


But in the end in Wonderland, we both went mad

by Marieke_things_dreams_and_stuff



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alex Danvers & Lena Luthor Friendship, Andrea/ Kara, Angry Lena Luthor, Danvers Sisters, Drunken Shenanigans, Endgame Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, Hurt Kara Danvers, Kara Danvers Needs a Hug, Kara is Ruby's idol, Lena's only mad for like four chapters because she loves Kara, Lillian and cat being aggressive pta moms talking up their kids in front of the teacher, Nervous Kara Danvers, Protective Alex Danvers, Protective Lena Luthor, Protective Samantha "Sam" Arias, Return of Cat Grant, Sad Kara Danvers, Slow Burn, Top! Lena energy, obviously, reformed Lillian Luthor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-18
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2020-07-08 04:00:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 167,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19863145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marieke_things_dreams_and_stuff/pseuds/Marieke_things_dreams_and_stuff
Summary: After Lena finds out about Kara’s secret identity, she doesn’t want to have anything to do with her former best friend/ long time crush.Kara feels so lost after Lena’s sudden departure from her life, that she becomes more and more reckless – a situation that both annoys and worries Alex endlessly.But when a mysterious new woman waltzes into Kara’s life and takes a special interest in the reporter, Kara finds herself intrigued. The people in Kara’s life worry that this new woman might be too good to be true, while Kara just wishes everyone could be happy for her.Lena will have to decide whether she wants to hold on to her pride, or save the girl she worked so hard on hating.





	1. All we can do

“Lena, please, let me explain, I didn’t mean to – ”

“Didn’t mean to what, Kara?”

Lena’s head whipped around, and she looked at Kara with such vitriol that Kara instantly shrunk back.

“Didn’t mean to lie to me? Didn’t mean to make a complete fool out of me?"

Kara shook her head, but Lena ignored her.

"You didn’t mean to have a good laugh with your friends at the expense of the little Luthor, who couldn’t even figure out her best friend was the city’s first and foremost superhero? You didn’t mean to do that, Kara? Really? God," she shook her head disbelievingly, "it must’ve been so funny to you people,” Lena sneered.

“Lena, no,” Kara tried.

“Or maybe,” Lena ignored Kara completely, “maybe you just didn’t mean for my brother to tell me, huh?”

Her eyes blazed with so much anger, that Kara instinctively ducked her head to avoid the burning glare. She’d seen that glare before, of course, it was infamous. The blazing eyes, pursed lips, raised eyebrows… it was terrifying. But for as long as Kara had known about that glare, she had always seen it being directed at others. At angry misogynistic lawyers and businessmen, her family, even Alex after a particularly nasty remark about Luthors and crime statistics. They had all been on the receiving end of that glare one time or another. But never her. Never Kara.

Lena continued to study her intently. Her eyes narrowed and her lips pursed. Never a good sign.

“That’s it, isn’t it? You’re sorry I ever found out. You wanted to keep it from me,” she said softly.

She seemed to become more certain of the idea the longer she spoke.

“You were never going to tell me, were you? You were going to keep me out of the loop forever.”

A tinge of hurt coated her angry words.

“No Lena, that’s not what – Lena, we never wanted to –”

“How many of your friends know about this?” Lena interrupted her. “Does Nia know? You’ve only been her friend for a year, but she seems to be in the loop, doesn’t she? I mean why wouldn’t she, she’s only your co-worker,” Lena added sarcastically.

“Lena, please, don’t do this.”

“Does J’onn know? Did Maggie? Or maybe you’ve already told Kelly? She is, after all, your sister’s new boo, right? So does...”

Lena paused. She suddenly looked up at Kara with wide eyes, and Kara instantly knew the connection the woman had made in her head. Lena took a step back. “Oh my God,” she said slowly, looking at Kara with so much hurt in her eyes.

“Does James know?” she asked disbelievingly.

Kara opened her mouth helplessly, but realised there was nothing she could say that wouldn’t upset the situation even further. She looked down at the floor. When Kara didn’t answer and instead pressed her lips together to keep from crying, Lena gasped and covered her mouth with her hand.

“My boyfriend, Kara?” Lena shrieked. “James knew? You both kept this from me?”

Lena got angrier with every word.

Kara didn’t answer.

The fact that Kara had nothing to say to defend herself, only upset Lena even further. She bit her tongue to keep her from exploding, and to take a hold of herself. That wasn’t the Luthor way. Luthors didn’t shriek, and they certainly didn’t act on their every emotion like pubescent teenagers. No, Luthors sought out the weaknesses of their prey and acted on those. They were cunning, and calculated, and Kara was just about to find out the full effect of said Luthor strategy.

“You know,” Lena said coldly, dropping her hands to her side, “for someone who’s so obsessed with loyalty and friendship, you’ve got some serious boundary issues when it comes to other people’s relationships.”

“Lena,” Kara pleaded softly, but Lena ignored her.

“My best friends and my boyfriend kept a huge secret from me, and you were just,” Lena waved her hand, “keeping that from me,” she stated.

There was no question in her words.

Kara hung her head in defeat.

Lena shook her head, and regarded her former best friend with an icy stare.

“You know Kara,” she said slowly, “I’ve been around a lot of really awful people in my life,” Lena’s tone was dangerously low, and she took a step closer to Kara, who instinctively took one back. “I’ve had friends like Veronica, and family like Lex and Lillian who conceived and conspired, who hurt and maimed others, but I don’t think, I have. Ever.” She harshly punctuated her words, “met someone so truly vile as you.”

“Lena, please,” it came out as a sob, and Kara hated it, “please, you know I never meant – if you would just let me explain – ”

“Save it, Kara,” Lena snapped. “I don’t need your half-assed explanations. In fact,” Lena grabbed her purse from the coffee table, still riddled with the untouched take-out Kara had ordered earlier on, and the glasses Lena had forced her to take off before, when she had rushed through the door like a storm, confronting Kara with all the lies she’d ever told, “I don’t need anything from you anymore.”

“Lena,” Kara said softly, “please.”

But Lena had already made up her mind. She snatched her black coat from its place on the couch, and moved towards the door. Before she could even turn the doorknob, however, Kara had already moved over there in a flash, blocking Lena’s way out.

“Kara,” Lena said coldly, “let me through.”

“No, not before you let me at least explain,” Kara pleaded. “I never wanted to hurt you, Lena, please! You have to believe me. You’re my best friend and I love you, and I can’t –”

“See, that’s where you’re wrong,” Lena interrupted. “We’re not friends, Kara. Apparently, we were never friends to begin with. You can’t have a friendship built on a lie,” she spat. “We’re nothing to each other anymore. You made sure of that.”

Kara shrunk back.

“Don’t bother coming by L-Corp again,” Lena added. “Don’t call me. Don’t text me. Leave me alone, Kara. If I see your face again in ten years it will be too soon. I want you out of my life.”

“Lena,” Kara whispered. Her voice cracked just the tiniest bit.

She could already feel the sting of the upcoming tears in her eyes. This couldn’t really be happening. Once upon a time the mere promise of Kara crying would have sent Lena into a frenzy, ready with open arms, cuddles, hot drinks and colourful threats to whoever would even dare hurt her best friend. Once upon a time, Lena would’ve cared about Kara. Lena would’ve comforted her.

But there was no warmth in Lena’s eyes now. No love, whatsoever.

“Please don’t leave,” Kara whispered, “everybody always leaves, please,” she begged, “I can’t have you leave too. I need you, Lena.”

Kara knew it was low. It was basically bordering on emotional blackmail, but she was desperate. Lena needed to stay. She needed to know how important she was to Kara, how amazing she was, and how horrible life would be without her.

Kara reached out her hands to touch Lena, but the other woman instinctively took a step back. The move seemed to shock them both. Kara’s eyes snapped up to Lena’s. A full wave of hurt flooded her senses.

Lena didn’t want Kara to touch her anymore. She had been rejected. Lena had backed away from her. Lena wanted to get away from her. Lena didn’t want her anymore.

It felt like a punch in the gut. It felt worse than being smacked into a building. It felt worse than the time Reign had thrown her of the roof of that skyscraper. It felt worse than the time that Mon-El had kissed Imra right in front of her. Hell, Kara would go as far as to say that it rivalled the pain Kryptonite always caused. No, scratch that. It definitely hurt more than kryptonite. Kryptonite stopped hurting after it had been taken away. Lena’s departure, Kara was sure, would be a lingering hurt that would slowly infest her body, and leave it rotting, desperate for contact. Lena being repulsed by Kara hurt more than anything and everything Kara had ever felt before, and Rao she suddenly felt sick.

Her eyes bored into Lena’s, unwilling to believe that they had really gotten to the point where Lena wouldn’t even consider touching her. Kara could see a flicker of regret, like Lena hadn’t meant to show her repulsion that clearly. As if she was irritated her basic instincts had betrayed her aversion to Kara. Because that was what it was, Kara realised. Kara physically repulsed Lena. Lena was disgusted by Kara.

The flicker only lasted a second before Lena’s face smoothed over once again, the same cool, cold expression that unnerved Kara so, because it reminded her so much of Lillian Luthor’s face, just etched onto Lena’s. The ‘don’t-see-don’t-feel’ Luther façade that Kara hated so. That expression made all hope of a reconciliation drain from Kara’s body. The Luthor façade equalled a ‘you-are-dead-to-me’ look, and there was no backing away from it.

Kara instantly missed the warm smiles when she noticed that expression. And not just the warm smiles, she missed the crinkles around Lena’s eyes that were usually present when they were together. The way Lena’s nose would scrunch up when Kara told her a particularly funny story from the time when she was still Cat Grant’s assistant. The way her cheeks would flush after she had a couple of glasses of wine, because she felt comfortable enough with Kara to let go completely. The way her dimple would show up when she was particularly happy with a move she made in Monopoly. All things Kara never knew she would miss so much. And now they were gone.

Embarrassed, Kara let her hands drop to her sides, and looked away from the face she loved so much. Kara understood that Lena wouldn’t budge, and she knew she had lost.

Lena stood unwavering, gripping her handbag so tightly her knuckles had turned white. She was holding herself back, Kara realised. The thought that Lena would have to restrain herself as not to act on her flight-reflex and push Kara aside to kick open the door filled her with dread that settled low in her stomach.  
She had truly lost her best friend now.

Knowing there was absolutely nothing she could say to change Lena’s mind, Kara wordlessly opened the door, keeping her eyes trained on the floor. She only caught a whiff of Lena’s perfume as the woman rushed through the door, and out of Kara’s life.  
She barely registered closing the door, and sliding down to the floor. She buried her face in her knees and started crying. 

* * *

It surprisingly only took Alex three hours, seven phone calls and one visit to Lex Luthor’s crime scene to figure out what had happened. She showed up at Kara’s door, and opened it with a spare key. She took one look at Kara’s blotchy face and red-rimmed eyes, and had her suspicions confirmed.

“Oh Kara,” she sighed, before dropping her bag onto the wooden floors and making her way over to her sister.

Seeing Alex’ slumped shoulders and the pity in her eyes, Kara could feel the tears start forming again. Which was ridiculous, because she had cried out all her tears already, right? There couldn’t possibly be any more tears left. If she cried any more, she reasoned, she might just shrivel up and dry out.

But Alex’s strong arms wrapped around her torso, and the familiar smell of leather, cheap drugstore shampoo, and the same Calvin Klein perfume Alex had insisted on wearing for the last twelve years invaded her senses, and Kara started sobbing loudly. Alex – like the angel she was, Rao bless her – didn’t say anything. She just tightened her hold, and kissed the crown of Kara’s head.

Kara felt like she was fifteen years old again, and her heart had just been broken by Jake Puckerman who had broken up with her just to ask Brie Reilley to homecoming three days later. She was transported back to the moment right after she had come running home in tears, ignoring Alex and Eliza’s questions about what had happened, as she ran into her room, flinging herself onto her bed and crying in her pillow. Alex had coaxed the story out of her, and had held her for hours that night, murmuring sweet things in her hair while Kara cried her eyes out. The warmth and the comfort Alex’s arms had provided had chased away the heartbreak and the embarrassment she’d felt all day long, and she had felt safe. Like things were going to be alright again. Alex’s soothing voice lulled her right into a sleepy trance, and the soft songs she’d sung reminded her that she had a home, and a family, and that she would be able to face Jake and all the other mean kids at school again, no matter how scared she was.

But that was just Jake Puckerman. Alex had broken his nose the next day, he had looked terrible in all the homecoming pictures, and Kara had had a great time with her friends at the dance. Kara had gotten over it, and had forgotten all about the embarrassment she felt the day that Jake had broken up with her. He wasn’t important. The whole situation hadn’t been important. That was a high school fling that was bound to burn out.

This was Lena. Her best friend Lena. The most amazing human being slash genius the world had ever known. Alex couldn’t just break Lena’s nose and have the hurt disappear. Not to say that she wouldn’t, because Alex had a strict ‘break her heart and I’ll break your face’ policy, but it wouldn’t make things better. Lena would still hate her, and Kara would still be alone.

Somehow that thought made her feel ten times more miserable, and she buried her face in Alex’s neck, while Alex rubbed soothing circles on her back, unable to do anything more.

When she was all cried out, Kara felt exhausted. She leant back and noticed that parts of Alex’s nice white T-shirt were completely soaked.

“Sorry,” she croaked, rubbing her wet eyes with her sleeve.

Alex shook her head.

“Don’t worry about it,” she said.

Her eyes were full of concern, and Kara had to duck her head to avoid the intense scrutiny behind them.  
Kara stood up, stretching her sore legs. That’s what she got for sitting on the floor for such an extended period of time. She took two glasses from her cupboard, and filled them with water from the tap.

“I’m guessing you know?” she asked, trying – and failing – to sound indifferent. She took a sip of her water to hide her pained expression.

Alex nodded, her eyes never leaving Kara’s face. It was unnerving. She hated being observed so closely.

“She told you?” Kara asked, voice cracking slightly.

“No, no she didn’t, I found out,” Alex said, quickly climbing to her feet after she saw the first cracks in Kara’s composure. “I tried calling you, but you didn’t answer. Then I called Lena, but she declined my call. So did her new assistant. I dug a little bit, and then I was called to Lex Luthor’s crime scene.” Kara raised her head at that. “There was apparently some ‘sensitive material regarding superheroes’ there. I checked the cameras, and, well,” she looked apologetic, “I saw Lena entering the building, and leave again, looking distraught.”

Alex took a deep breath. Kara let her continue the story, even though she already knew what happened. Lena had spat out every detail of the discovery, cutting deeply with every word. Kara cringed inwardly when she remembered how Lena had yelled that even her treacherous, murderous psychopath of brother had been more honest than her, and what did it make her if she was less honest than a notorious terrorist? Kara honestly hadn’t known how to answer that one. Maybe Lena had a point.

“The Supergirl files had been accessed within the timeframe of Lena’s presence in the facility.”

Kara looked at the floor. She wasn’t going to cry again. But Rao, did it hurt.

“There was video material of you, showcasing your powers in your civilian clothes, most likely from security cameras. We deleted it, of course. So, ehm,” she trailed off uncomfortably, “no need to stress about that, I guess, if that was something you were worried about.”

It wasn’t. But it did remind Kara of something.

It was strange, Kara thought. Alex was usually the first to yell at her for being reckless with her secret identity. She couldn’t count the amount of times Alex had berated her for forgetting her glasses, or producing terrible excuses to leave her work or her friends to change into her Super alter ego. Alex was worse than Eliza and Jeremiah combined when it came to protecting her secret identity. But now, right when it had been revealed that there was security evidence of Kara using her powers in plain sight, Alex was going easy on her? That made absolutely no sense.

“So from then on, we contacted – ”

“Why aren’t you yelling at me?” Kara interrupted her, disrupting Alex’s entire train of thought.

“… What?” Alex asked. “Why would I… Why do you think I should yell at you?”

Kara shrugged. “I broke our rules, didn’t I? I accidentally revealed my secret identity to Lex Luthor of all people? Lillian knows too. So does Eve, apparently. So why aren’t you yelling at me?”

Understanding dawned on Alex and she nodded once before looking at the glass Kara had pushed into her hands.

“That’s true. It was pretty irresponsible,” Alex said.

Her words didn’t sound angry though.

“I figured you were having a pretty tough time trying to hide your Super ego without me or Lena finding out. You must’ve run pretty ragged, being on your own, with no one to rely on. I figured you deserved a bit of a break.” A

lex’s eyes found Kara’s, and Kara saw nothing but regret in them, which made her frown.

“It wasn’t your fault, Alex. We did what we had to do.”

“I know, I know,” Alex murmured. But she didn’t look at Kara. “Doesn’t mean the entire situation doesn’t suck ass though.”

Kara cracked a smile at that, surprising herself.

“Yeah,” she mumbled, covering Alex’s hand with her own, making Alex look at her again, “it did really suck ass.”

Alex let out a disbelieving laugh that bordered on a sob.

“Kara Danvers, is that a curse I just heard leave your lips?” she asked in mock-outrage.

Kara laughed, tears jumping into her eyes. Whether from happiness or sadness, she didn’t know.

“Well, you said it first!” she exclaimed. “And anyway, sometimes the situation really requires a close analysis, you know?”

Alex nodded seriously.

“And your professional analysis of the situation would be that it sucked ass?”

Kara laughed and shoved Alex’s shoulder lightly.

“Shut up,” she murmured lovingly.

Alex grabbed a pint of raspberry ice cream from the freezer, and collected two spoons from one of the drawers in Kara’s kitchen.

“Are you kidding? This is gold. Soon I’m going to have to install a swear jar for you here, you little delinquent.”

“Stop!” Kara laughed.

She reached out to push Alex again, but Alex expertly evaded the swats, and danced around Kara’s apartment with the stolen frozen goods.

“I mean, what is there to be said about the state of our world when Kara Danvers has turned to swearing?” Alex said dramatically, swinging the spoons in her hand.

“Give me back my ice cream instead of mocking me, you monster!” Kara laughed.

She made her way over to the couch where Alex was sitting comfortably, having already ripped off the lid of the ice cream container.

“Ooh, ‘monster’, I feel like that’s a little soft for a woman who just used the expression ‘to suck ass.’”

“Oh shut up,” Kara mumbled, snatching the container from Alex’s hands, and digging in.

Alex’s laugh filled up the apartment and made everything feel a little lighter for a while. 

* * *

“So,” Alex began after they’d both relaxed fully on the couch, watching some dumb show on TV, and had finished not only the full pint of ice cream, but also the lukewarm take-out Kara had picked up for her and Lena earlier on.

Kara’s eyes didn’t leave the screen. “Yeah?”

Alex put down her empty take-out box and settled in one corner of the couch. She looked at Kara.

“Do you want me to go all director of the D.E.O on Lena?” she asked seriously.

“What?” Kara’s head snapped towards Alex.

“You know,” she stated matter-of-factly, “I come at her with every possible law I can, I annoy the living hell out of her and her stupid company, make her life miserable. You know, D.E.O. stuff. I bet I could even get Lucy to get on board to help.”

“No, what the hell, Alex! What would that even – I mean seriously, Al, honestly I – ” Kara sputtered, “that is horrible. And unethical. And possibly the worst possible thing to do in this situation. Not to mention a gross abuse of power.”

Alex put her hands up in defeat.

“Okay, okay. It was just a question.”

Alex narrowed her eyes as she studied Kara closely. She still had her chopsticks and food on her lap but made no move to eat any more. Which in itself was very disconcerting for a girl who complained about being hungry twenty-four seven. She was looking at the TV, but Alex would bet her life savings that Kara wasn’t following a second of the actual show. Instead, she just looked… lost. Or maybe dazed; like she still hadn’t quite managed to make sense of what had transpired before.

“So what do you want to do now?” Alex asked.

Kara frowned. “Do?”

Alex sighed deeply. It was just like Kara to just ignore her own emotions and pretend to be an empty serious canvas. Not that Alex was the picture perfect ideal of dealing with problems in a healthy constructive manner, but still. She hated cold uncaring Kara. And she definitely did not want a post-Mon-El repeat.

All of them, meaning James, Lena, Winn, Maggie and Alex had to put their heads together to pull Kara out of it. And they had managed. They’d all adapted their timetables to make sure Kara was never all alone and occupied with only her thoughts. James had pulled a few favours at work, and had gotten Kara the coolest new stories to work on. Alex and J’onn made sure the D.E.O. covered more ground in National City, so Kara didn’t have too many opportunities to hide in her Super persona. Lena had organised sleepovers at her place with Alex and Maggie, so Kara wouldn’t have to suffer through recurring nightmares and lonely nights. Maggie had gracefully offered up her bed to Kara and slept on the couch whenever Kara needed to cuddle with Alex to feel better again. The gang had invited her – or dragged her along – to every event they could think of, and they had made sure she had felt loved. Slowly but surely, Kara had crawled back out of her shell and had started to show her emotions again, admitting she didn’t always feel as cheery as the smile she was putting on.

The post-post-Mon-El faze had been a team effort. And honestly, Alex was concerned that without Lena, Kara would find herself in a similar situation, and this time without a best friend who wanted the best for her.

“Yes, Kara. Do,” Alex repeated. “How are you going to tackle the situation?”

Kara shrugged and it took everything in Alex not to roll her eyes at her little sister.

“Are you going to apologize to Lena? Are you going to go by L-Corp with flowers and chocolates from Belgium like that one time you spilled mayonnaise on her white Prada T-shirt even though she didn’t care?”

Kara sighed before mumbling, “I don’t think this is the kind of thing that can be fixed with chocolates and flowers, Alex.”

Alex opened her mouth to say something, but Kara raised her hand to stop her.

“I tried apologizing to her. She didn’t want to hear it. She told me she never wanted to hear from me again.”

“She doesn’t mean it,” Alex interrupted, “she just said those things in the heat of the moment. You can’t believe she’d actually – ”

“Please, Alex,” Kara stopped her sister, “don’t try and make me feel better. I know what she said. I know what she meant. She hates me.”

Kara added the last sentence in a whisper. Like it was a deep, dark, terrible curse, which would invoke terrible things if said aloud. The tears sprung into Kara’s eyes again, but she angrily wiped them away.

Now Alex had always had a complicated relationship with Lena. She was deeply suspicious of the youngest Luthor who had taken such a liking to her little sister, at first. But honestly, who could blame her? Alex had always been fiercely protective of her younger sister, and it did seem really suspicious that a woman whose family was notorious for its deep aversion to aliens somehow wanted to befriend the city’s prime Alien superhero. Then, after a series of heroic decisions made by Lena, some affecting her own family, Alex was forced to re-evaluate the woman. After some shared girls’ nights, some interrupted sister nights where Kara had neglected to tell Alex that Lena might stop by, and many, many arguments between the two stubborn women, Alex had to begrudgingly admit that Lena Luthor wasn’t half bad. In fact, she was pretty cool. And she always brought the best whiskey to parties, which Kara insisted was not an argument to befriend someone, but definitely did not negatively impact Lena’s ability to get into Alex’s good graces.

Over the two years since they had first met, Alex had started to really appreciate Lena for everything she did. Whether it was helping the D.E.O. and Supergirl to catch dangerous criminals and World Killers, or just organising the best surprise parties for Kara, Lena had proven herself to be an invaluable friend to both Kara and Alex.

Alex especially appreciated Lena in hard times. Because she was the only one, beside herself of course, who could always manage to cheer Kara up. If Kara had had a tough day at work, or if she had gone on yet another terrible date, Lena would always be there to help her, to listen to her, and to talk her through whatever she was facing.

At first Alex had been kind of miffed that Kara would go to someone else for comfort. Her bed was usually the first to be occupied by a crying Kryptonian when something bad had occurred, even when she was still sharing it with Maggie – who, she had to admit, took it like a champ, and had just rolled over to make more space. But recently, Alex only heard about the terrible things that had happened a day after the events had transpired. Lena had become Kara’s first call in case of emergencies. And even though it stung just the tiniest bit that Kara had someone else now, Alex knew that it was for the best. The more support Kara had to rely on, the better it was for everybody involved. And Alex still sometimes woke up with a blonde head hidden in the crook of her neck, and two arms holding her tightly.

All of this was just to say that Alex really liked Lena Luthor. But right now, in that very moment, Alex was ready to kill the bitch.  
Kara thought her best friend hated her. Lena made Kara cry. And worst of all; she had left. She had left Kara Danvers alone in her apartment after yet another person had left her life. By doing so, Lena Luthor had single-handedly broken every rule in the ‘Alex-Danvers’-handbook-for-dealing-with-her-amazing-slash-dorky-sometimes-incomprehensibly-stupid-Kryptonian-sister.’

Alex looked at her little sister trying to keep it together on the couch, and felt her blood start to boil.

“I don’t care what you say about not going loco on Lena,” Alex said standing up. “That bitch had no right to make you cry the way she did. She has the right to be angry, yes,” she clarified when she looked into Kara’s eyes growing with panic, “but she does not get to say that she hates you. I’m going over there right now.”

“To do what?” Kara asked concerned.

Alex shoved her phone in her pocket and walked over the door.

“To give her a piece of my mind,” she said. “And maybe a taste of my fist if she asks for it,” she mumbled in an afterthought, even though she knew Kara would hear.

Kara let out a high-pitched squeak and rushed over to her sister.

“You can’t do that!” she yelled.

“Why not?” Alex asked angrily, “She did it to you, didn’t she?”

“That’s different!” Kara said. “She didn’t lie to me for almost three years! She didn’t befriend me knowing full well she was keeping a huge secret from me. She didn’t hurt me,” Kara’s voice cracked, “she didn’t make me believe I had found an actual family, who loved and supported her, while it was all a lie. She didn’t take that away from me. I did. I took that away from her,” Kara let out a sob. “I lied to her, Alex. She’s right to hate me. It’s all my fault, I…”

“No, Kara,” Alex immediately regretted her outburst. This wasn't helping in the slightest. Of course Kara felt guilty. Of course she would think it was her fault. That was just typical of her.

Alex pulled her sister close. “I’m sorry, okay?” she whispered in Kara’s hair. “I won’t hurt her, I’m sorry. I won’t go over there. I’m so sorry, what do you want me to do? Just tell me what to do, Kara. Say the word and I’ll take care of it,” she promised.

Kara sniffled a little bit before backing away from her sister. She bit her lip and looked at the ground.

“There is one thing,” she whispered.

“Anything,” Alex said eagerly, clasping Kara’s hands tightly in her own.

“It’s just,” Kara took a deep breath, “she’s really mad, Alex,” Alex bit her tongue to avoid saying anything about misplaced anger and the like, “but she’s also really sad.”

Alex frowned.

“She didn’t just lose her best friend, Alex. She lost her family,” Kara explained, “her entire support system. That’s us. And it’s going to be heart breaking for her. She won’t just lose one friend. She’ll lose all her friends. You, James, Nia… It’s not fair. She shouldn’t lose her family just because she hates me. She’s going to need a friend.”

At that, Kara looked up at Alex. Her eyes were deeply concentrated on Alex, who frowned again. Alex was still confused, but when she saw the meaningful look in Kara’s eyes, paired with a hopeful twinkle, something clicked.

“Oh hell no.” Alex backed away from her sister.

“Alex,” Kara tried.

“If you think I’m going over to the stone witch and let her rant about you while I sit there with a stupid smile on my face, you’ve clearly been punched in the face too often and it has left you with a giant concussion.”

“You know how insecure she is!” Kara said. “You know she’s going to blame herself for – well, I don’t really know what – but you know she will! She’ll just drown her sorrows like she always does, and she’ll be miserable.”

Kara looked at the floor, and started to pace around the room, talking more to herself now than to her sister. “And of course, she’ll claim she’s fine, she always does, but she’s not. I mean, the last time she thought something was her fault she was ready to kill a man, which is awful! I mean it was Edge, who is a degenerate certified D-head, so it wouldn’t be completely horrible, seeing as he is – ”

“Kara!” Alex interrupted Kara’s ramblings. The latter came to a stand still and looked up at her sister. “I don’t want to go over to Lena’s to be her friend. You need me. I’m on your side. Not hers.”

“Alex, she needs you more,” Kara argued.

“Yeah, well, I don’t care about that!” Alex lied.

Because she did care.

A whole lot, actually.

She still remembered what it was like fighting side by side with Lena while she didn’t know her actual sister was Supergirl. She remembered how supportive Lena had been when she was worried about Kara or work or even the hypothetical baby. Lena had been there for her. She’d reassured her that Kara was fine, that CatCo was safe, that Alex would make an amazing mother, and that Lena would be honoured to be an honorary aunt to her future baby. She was amazing. They’d even gotten blackout drunk together after a day of intense harun-el research, which, in Alex’s book, basically meant they were best friends for life.

And Lena had needed Alex as well, Alex remembered guiltily. Lena was strong, stronger than most people Alex knew, but she doubted herself so much. Every single decision the woman made was turned over and deliberated upon for hours, until Lena had calculated every risk, had studied all the possible consequences and outcomes of said decision, and she had made sure the negative impact on her employees was minimal to non-existent. When she did make mistakes, rare as those were, Alex could see the woman crumble from within. She would lock the door to her office, and when it opened a few hours later, her desk would sport an extra empty scotch glass, and the full whiskey on the drinks table would be completely drained. She would see a blush on Lena’s cheeks, and red-rimmed eyes, trained on her laptop, and the woman would say: “Let’s move on.”

But all of that didn’t matter when it came to Kara. Kara was her sister. Kara was a sad alien immigrant who needed her help, and she couldn’t just ignore that. But if that was really what Kara wanted…

Alex studied Kara’s face intently.

“Are you sure that’s what you want?” she asked. “For me to get close to Lena again? Even if it means you will have to see her be happy with someone else?”

Kara flinched.

“It would hurt you, Kara,” Alex whispered. “You know it will.”

Kara swallowed hard. She seemed to mull Alex’s words over in her head, before something clicked in those baby blues. Kara had made up her mind. She straightened her shoulders and raised her head. Even before Alex heard the words leave her mouth, she knew what decision her younger sister had made. Of course her sister would go on the whole selfless martyr tour. Alex sighed internally. She had a feeling these next couple of months wouldn’t be kind to her.

“Choose her. She needs someone on her side.” Kara wrapped her arms around herself. “Make sure she doesn’t drink too much. And tell her…” she trailed off, suddenly unsure of herself. Kara tipped her head, like she did when she always did when she was thinking deeply about something. She seemed to realise something, because she shook her head and looked up at Alex sadly. “On second thought, don’t tell her I said anything. It will have an adverse affect. She won’t want to listen to you.”

“Kara,” Alex tried one more time, but Kara shook her head.

“She really needs a friend, Alex, please,” Kara begged, “please do this for me?”

And God. When, in the almost fifteen years Alex had known Kara, had she ever been able to say no to her sister’s gigantic, blue puppy dog eyes?

(Never was the obvious answer, not even when Kara had begged Alex to go on a road trip with her to a neighbouring town in California just to see Britney Spears in concert. The weather had been scorching hot, the car had been too old to have an AC installed, and the concert had been so truly god awful, that Alex had suffered from a head ache and ringing ears for days. Still, it had been worth it just to see Kara’s star struck eyes in the flashing lights at the venue. Kara still claimed it was one of the best days in her entire lifetime. So Alex did as well.)

Alex sighed. “Okay,” she said. "If you're sure."

Kara nodded.

"I'll leave right now, then," Alex said.

Kara just looked at the floor and nodded, arms wrapped tightly around her own midriff.

Alex shook her head.

"I love you, Kara Danvers."

Kara looked up at Alex with a watery smile. "I love you too, Alex Danvers."

Alex smiled sadly at Kara one last time, wanting to stay so desperately to take care of her little sister, but knowing she would never be able to change her mind. Alex's shoulders slumped as she resigned herself, and Kara, to their fates before grabbing her bag from where she’d dropped it by the door, taking one last look and her sister’s forlorn expression, and leaving.

She pretended she couldn’t hear Kara start to cry all over again through the door.


	2. Chapter 2

Lena was having a terrible, horrible, absolutely no-good day. The shattered bottles of over-expensive liquor in her kitchen could attest to that.

The second she had decided to woman up and confront Kara, her day had gone spectacularly downhill. If she believed in any of that superstitious crap, Lena might even say karma had been involved.

It started the moment Kara opened the door for her, and greeted her with that same wide-eyed wonder and show-stopping enthusiastic smile that had reeled Lena in so easily the first time they met so many years ago.

A part of Lena hated herself for it. Hated the way her eyes had been so cold – she knew they were, it was an expression that she’d worked to perfect for years to intimidate the people around her. Most of all, she hated the way Kara’s smile had slowly slipped off her face as she regarded the expression on Lena’s face.

She’d looked scared, and sad, but also resigned, as if she’d expected this to happen a lot sooner than it actually did. It almost made Lena go back to the question that had haunted her from the moment Lex had told her about Supergirl and Kara. Had Kara been planning on revealing her secret to her? And if so, when? But then she had to ask herself, would it have mattered? Kara had lied to her for almost three years. They had been friends for almost the entire duration of that time. How many opportunities had Kara had to reveal her secret? Hundreds? Thousands? Lena had trusted Kara with all her heart and almost all her secrets. Was it unfair for her to expect the same thing from her best friend?

Lena didn’t think so. So she let go of the question. It didn’t matter whether or not Kara had wanted to tell her. She didn’t. She lied. And that was enough to earn her a life long rejection from Lena’s life.

Kara had opened the door wider, stepping aside silently to let Lena barge through the door.

From then on, Lena had just started shouting at her. She had hurled every insult and reproach she could think of at her former friend, and Kara had let them all land, never trying to justify herself. And it had felt good. It had felt good to feel empowered again, to use her anger as a catharsis for the actual hurt she was feeling so deeply because her best friend in the whole world – her only friend, for an embarrassing long period of time – had lied to her face, and had made her the laughing stock of the ‘superfriends’. So yes, it felt so good to see Kara retreat within herself, to see the young reporter wrap her arms around herself, unable to look Lena in the eye.

Not for the first time in her life, Lena had been scared of how good it felt to hurt someone else. Because it had. The tears in Kara’s eyes, the way she was begging for Lena’s forgiveness made her feel like herself again. Like the powerful woman she knew she was and always would be. And no subpar reporter slash mediocre superhero in spandex was going to take that away from her.

She would not let Kara watch her break. She wasn’t going to fall apart. She wasn’t going to give Kara the satisfaction of being the bigger person, and letting Kara hug her like the self-proclaimed holier-than-thou narcissist she was. No, this was her power move. Kara lied to her, and hurt her. And in true Luthor-fashion, she was going to make Kara regret ever crossing her.

So maybe storming out and telling Kara she was nothing to her was a bit over the top, bordering on dramatic, but God, it had been _so_ satisfying. Everything from the look in Kara’s eyes, to the clicking of her own heels had made Lena’s heart soar with delight. She had won. She had successfully reduced her best friend to tears.

The euphoria lasted for about ten minutes after leaving Kara’s apartment. Then, the reality of the situation set in. She had made her best friend cry. She had burned every bridge there was between the two of them.

Kara had also been her link to a multitude of people she considered her friends. Nia, Alex, God, she thought, even James had all befriended her at one point or another because Kara had introduced them. And now that Kara was out of her life…

It wasn’t hard to imagine what side the so-called ‘superfriends’ would pick if it came down to a choice. Kara was the literal embodiment of everything good and nice and sweet and sunshine-y in this world, whereas Lena was dark, broody, a semi-alcoholic with a tendency to make rash decisions based on extreme emotions.

Only Kara though knew that wasn’t true for a fact, an annoying little voice in Lena’s whispered. Kara had told her time and time again that Lena was basically the sweetest human puppy ever to exist. Kara’s favourite spot in the world, she had once confided, was on her ratty couch, cuddled in Lena’s arms because, “I can’t help it Lena! You’re so soft, and warm, and you smell so good. Like, I know all rich people smell good, but you smell like the most amazing thing in the whole universe.”

Only Kara knew that Lena had a hard time watching sad movies. She figured that one out when they were watching Titanic one night. Lena wouldn’t outright admit she had cried, but she definitely hid her face in some cushions, and needed an extra glass of wine to get through the part where Rose was singing on that wooden door in the middle of the ocean. None of that mattered to Kara though. She had just scooted closer to Lena, and had held her hand when the latter’s eyes started to prickle. Kara, of course, had had tears streaming down her face, but she was never ashamed of it, and Lena never minded. She liked that Kara felt safe enough with her to express her emotions.

Not that safe, though, Lena bitterly thought. Not safe enough to tell her the truth.

Storming out of Kara’s apartment had only done so much. She had quickly lost momentum, so she tried to keep the power trip going by heading to L-Corp. Once she had arrived however, the bad news started piling up.

First, her newest assistant had left a resignation letter on her desk – apparently Lena had left the girl terrified after showing up at her office in the hours following Lex’s death – she’d maybe berated the girl a little too harshly for forgetting to copy some files, but Lena couldn’t find it in her to feel guilty about it – and that said assistant had been too scared to tell Lena in person.

It had definitely put a dent in her mood; she was going to have to go through yet another hiring process and subsequent background checks, which took out a huge chunk of her time, but it hadn’t completely ruined her day. That came later, when she got a phone call saying two of her biggest investors had pulled out of her newest invention because of all the negative news following her brother’s demise – again.

Lena could have screamed. She fought the urge to break everything in her office and pull out her hair and fire everyone on the same floor as her, and sank back in her comfortable chair, a luxury she had been happy to indulge in when taking over LuthorCorp.

She sat there for a second, contemplating her next move, before she suddenly reached out and wiped everything from her desk in a single sweet. Laptop, tablet, pens, photographs, glasses and useless trinkets fell to the floor as Lena felt the heat rise to her cheeks.

She was fucking angry.

Not just at those idiot investors who would rue the day they crossed her, not only at Kara, who couldn’t be bothered to be honest with her best friend, not only at her brother for shattering the perfect illusion. No, she was fucking angry at the world. Where was the fucking irony in being shunned and hated for her last name solely based on the fact that her brother hated aliens, and then befriending an alien who helped her get rid of the negative stigma surrounding her name, only to betray her in the end. How was this her life?

Lena looked down at the mess on her floor. She was pretty sure her laptop hadn’t survived the fall. Neither had her tablet.

Fuck it. Lena decided, standing up and grabbing her purse. She would replace everything tomorrow. With that, she stepped around the mess and went home. There was a bottle of expensive vodka somewhere in her cupboard with her name on it.

* * *

So that’s how she came to be the most miserable human being in all of National City. Drunk, tired and friendless, she sat on her leather couch, alternating between tapping drunk messages on her phone – which, in hindsight, could pose some problems – and mindlessly flipping through the channels on her TV. When she saw that there was absolutely nothing on, she threw the remote at the TV, effectively shattering the screen. Whatever. She only used the thing when Kara was there, anyway.

She stood up on shaky legs and stumbled over to her kitchen island to pour herself another drink. Lena struggled to pour the drink, as her hands were trembling too much. Right when the liquid was finally, _finally_ heading for her glass, there was a knock on her door, which completely broke her concentration, and made her spill hundreds of dollars worth of whiskey all over her hands and her kitchen countertop.

Lena let out a low growl and wiped her sticky hands on her designer jeans. She hoped that the person on the other side of the door had a good relationship with their deity, because Lena was going to obliterate them from existence. That would teach them never to come face to face with a Luthor who just had a very bad day.

“This had better be good,” Lena growled when she yanked the door open.

She was completely gobsmacked, however, when she saw who it was.

Alex Danvers stood in her door opening, a Big Belly Burger take-out bag in her hand, a hand on her hip, and a raised eyebrow that seemed to express a lot of different feelings at the same time, the dominant one of which seemed to be: ‘what the actual fuck?’

Lena could only imagine what she must look like. Half-empty bottle of whiskey in her hand, messy hair from lying down on her couch for the better part of the afternoon, and blotchy red patches on her skin from drinking – slightly – too much.

But all of that didn’t matter, Lena reminded herself. Alex was Kara’s sister. Kara lied to her. Therefor, Alex had lied to her too. She mentally applauded herself for putting those important pieces of information together in her head.

With her best, most impressive nonchalant, uncaring voice she asked: “What do you want?” Unfortunately, it came out kind of slurred and slightly desperate. “If you’re here to make me sign an NDA, you can just leave the paperwork on my desk in my office. No need to come all the way down here.”

Alex shook her head.

“I’m not here for that,” she said. She raised her take-out carrying hand. “I just thought you might need some comfort food.”

Lena almost barked out a laugh at the insanity of the situation. Moments ago, she’d broken Alex’s sister’s heart – stomped on it, would be a better description – and now Alex was here offering her food? Maybe Lena had expected Alex to show up, but in a vastly different scenario. Like, Alex would come barging in through the door, fist raised high, ready to knock Lena into a different universe. She had expected a litany of curses and some choice words that would involve the terms ‘Luthor,’ ‘unreliable’ and ‘stone cold bitch.’

But no, the other woman was there offering take-out.

The sheer ridiculousness of the situation almost made Lena forget about her anger in the first place, and she stepped aside, letting Alex in.

Alex took in the scene before her with wide eyes. The kitchen was covered in empty broken bottles of various kinds of alcohol, pictures had been ripped from their respective positions on the wall and ripped up, and Alex was pretty sure she could see a shattered flat-screen TV on the floor. Honestly, Alex thought, it was a wonder that Lena hadn’t cut her feet yet from all the pieces of glass littering the floor.

Alex quickly smoothed over her face and turned around to face Lena who was regarding her wearily through narrowed eyes. Though, to be fair, Alex was like sixty per cent certain those eyes were narrowed because of all the alcohol.

“So,” she asked faux cheerily, “plates or cartons?”

* * *

After Alex had watched Lena eat her burger with tiny bites – she herself was still stuffed from all the food she’d eaten with Kara – she saw Lena’s bloodshot eyes flutter close before widening again, like she was fighting off sleep, still holding a piece of her burger in her hand. Alex decided a conversation could wait until morning.

“C’mon,” she said, taking Lena carefully by the arm, gently prying the food from the younger woman’s fingers and putting it on the kitchen counter. The other woman didn’t protest. She stumbled a bit, coming down from a stool, and leaned heavily on Alex, who caught her effortlessly. “Let’s get you to bed,” Alex said with her most soothing voice. It was the voice she used when Kara was upset or tired, or when Maggie had had a horrible day at work. It was her Soft Alex voice, as Kara lovingly called it. The one not a lot of people were aware even existed.

Alex tried to navigate her way through the apartment, which had way too many bedrooms and bathrooms to be comfortable, in her opinion, mindful to avoid the glass on the floor. She had been here before, of course, but the last time she’d been here, they had both been black-out drunk, and had fallen asleep on the couch so there had been no need for Alex to look for a specific bedroom.

“Which one is yours?” Alex asked eventually, tired and frustrated of the endless wooden doors that led to impersonal bedrooms.

Lena pointed tiredly to a door at the end of the hall. At that point, Alex’s shoulder had started to hurt from Lena’s awkward position. Silently begging the woman not to throw up, Alex decided, to hell with it, and lifted the woman over her shoulder.

Lena just grunted, but didn’t protest. At least she wasn’t a difficult drunk, Alex decided.

She pushed open the door with her foot and made her way into one of the most spacious bedrooms she’d ever set foot in. A giant bed filled with decorative pillows, and beautiful light blue sheets dominated the room, which also housed a comfortable couch and a walk-in closet.

Not having the time to inspect the room further – which was somewhat regrettable, because Alex loved exploring new places – Alex carefully set Lena down in the middle of the bed. The younger woman was already clad in leggings and a soft sweater, so Alex decided against trying to change the woman into some pyjamas. She threw the pillows to the floor, and untucked Lena’s blanket to cover her with it. Lena was silent throughout it all, barely moving her body while Alex took care of her.

When Lena was settled in the bed, Alex emptied her garbage can and placed it next to the woman’s bed, in case she needed to throw up in the middle of the night.

“Lena,” Alex whispered, but Lena didn’t react. She frowned a little, but her eyes were already closed. “Lena, if you need to hurl, there’s a basket next to you, okay?” Lena gave no signs that she heard anything. “I mean it Lena,” Alex tried again, “if you vomit all over this carpet I’m not cleaning it up, you hear me?” Lena just grunted, and Alex couldn’t supress a smile. Even though Lena had been an absolute bitch to her sister that day, and even though Alex really wanted to hate her for it, Lena could just be so utterly adorable when she was unguarded.

Alex leaned down and pressed a short kiss to Lena’s forehead.

“Feel better, Lena,” Alex whispered. She closed the blinds in Lena’s room, and left the bedroom, closing the door behind her.

* * *

Lena woke up with a headache so absolutely skull-breaking, she thought she was going blind for a second. She groaned loudly before sitting up. She felt hot all over, her sweater stuck to her back, and her stomach was expressing its discontent with the situation.

She covered her eyes with her hands and sighed deeply. This situation wasn’t completely unfamiliar to her. All through high school and college, Lena had always been known as the girl who wouldn’t miss out on a party, frat- or otherwise. Being a Luthor – and an especially hot one at that – she’d always gotten invited to go the to newest clubs, the most extravagant get-togethers, and the wildest booze boat trips. She hadn’t even really stopped when she’d officially become the leader of L-Corp. She didn’t go out anymore, because people relied on her then, and with all the work Lex had left for her, she hadn’t even been able to find the time to get a drink. Nor did she have friends who wanted to go out and get a drink with her. The invites had stopped coming, her friends had stopped texting, the work had kept piling up, and somehow, the only time she found herself with a glass of alcohol in her hand anymore was when she got home after a long day of work to drink cheep red wine on her couch before passing out and doing it all over again.

It wasn’t the healthiest way of living, but it was living. And through the years Lena had gotten efficient at coping with her hangovers. She put bottles of water and painkillers on her nightstand, had her clothes for the next day pressed and laid out for her so she wouldn’t have to fuss about getting to work on time, and made her assistant go out for the meanest, most caffeinated drink she could get every morning to power through her day.

But all of that had changed with Kara. Kara invited her over so many times to watch a movie, to play games or just to talk on her couch over some greasy Chinese take-out she loved so much, that nights where she passed out from alcohol poisoning became rarer and rarer. She stayed at Kara’s later and later, desperate to soak up some of the happiness and warmth the girl radiated. When she did eventually get home, it was late and she was all comfortable and satiated, and she would usually fall asleep within the half hour of coming home, without needing a glass of wine to lull her to sleep. It felt good, and safe.

Which was probably why this hangover was hitting her like a freight train. It had been too long since her last one. Although…

Lena looked around and saw that the curtains were drawn, that the decorative pillows were arranged neatly on the sofa by the wall, and that her phone was fully charged – and overflowing with messages from Sam she was too tired to read – on her nightstand, next to a glass of water and an Ibuprofen. How had she been this organised when she had gotten black-out drunk?

Alex.

The memories of last night gradually came back to her with Alex’s name. Alex had come by. She still didn’t really know why. But Alex had fed her, she’d brought her to her room, and she’d even kissed her goodnight.

Oh God.

Ignoring the embarrassment in her lower belly, because _oh God_ Alex Danvers had had to put Lena to bed, Lena was just really fucking confused. Why the Hell would Alex, assuming she’d heard all about what had went down between Kara and herself – and knowing the two sisters that was just inevitable – show up at Lena’s place to show her kindness, and love in a moment of weakness? Why hadn’t she punched Lena in the face? Why hadn’t she yelled at her, or shot her, or whatever?

Lena sighed. Her head hurt too much to think about all that this early in the morning. With a trembling hand, she reached out for the glass of water and swallowed her pill. She had a disgusting, vaguely familiar taste in her mouth, and she was instantly disgusted with herself. Gathering all her courage, Lena slid the blanket away from her, turned to swing her legs over the bed – all the while her head throbbed in protest – and shakily stood up.

She almost instantly wanted to sit back down, because her stomach seemed to make its way up to her throat. In the five milliseconds it took her to make a decision, she ran over to the bathroom, almost tripping over the red patterned carpet on her floor, and threw up in her toilet. One hand gripped the bowl, while the other tried in vain to pull her hair from her face. All the various liquors she’d consumed last night made their way up her throat, and the feeling was so absolutely burning and torturous that Lena regretted every decision she’d ever made in her life.

In between heaves, Lena became vaguely aware of noise in her apartment, as if someone were trying to make their way into her room. For a split second, she worried about abductors or thieves, but honestly, at that moment she preferred getting shot over enduring another second of this self-induced torture. She heard doors opening, and what sounded like someone running or tumbling towards her own room.

The door to her bathroom opened, and Alex Danvers stood in her door opening _again_ with a worried expression on her face. Lena didn’t have enough time to process it before another wave of vomit came out. Alex quickly made her way over to the younger girl, and gently held Lena’s hair back.

“Shh, it’s okay, I’m here,” Alex said, soothingly rubbing circles on the younger girl’s back.

Lena teared up through the vomiting, whether from the general nausea or the loving gesture, she didn’t know. All she knew was she’d never been more grateful to have Alex in her life.

After a couple of more minutes of coughing up bile and gall, nothing came out anymore. Lena’s was glad. Had it continued for ten more minutes, she was sure she’d be expelling her own organs. She grabbed some toilet paper, and wiped her mouth with it before flushing it down the toilet.

She shakily tried to stand up, and Alex was there immediately to support her.

“Are you okay, can you stand?” she asked worriedly.

“Yeah, m’fine,” Lena mumbled, “m’just a little sick.”

Lena could almost see how hard Alex was trying not to laugh at the situation.

“I can see that,” Alex answered, barely supressing a smile, “I also want to add that that is the understatement of the century. I didn’t even know we could still get hangovers like that at our age.”

Lena scoffed. “Speak for yourself, you old bat. I’m in the prime of my life.”

Alex actually laughed out loud at that, and Lena couldn’t help but crack a smile in response. Alex’s laugh couldn’t differ any more from Kara’s, but it still somehow transferred that warmth and that love that Kara could always exude.

“You should tell me that when I haven’t just seen you throw up a life’s worth of alcohol,” Alex countered, but the grin on her face softened the words considerably.

“Yeah, well,” Lena mumbled, but she didn’t really have any other points to defend herself with. For once, it didn’t feel so bad to lose an argument. She leaned heavily on Alex, as the oldest Danvers carefully helped her to her kitchen.

When she got there, Lena was very confused. She could have sworn she’d left her kitchen in ruins, with broken bottles everywhere. Those weren’t there now, though. In fact, the kitchen looked clearer than it had in years. The counters were wiped clean, the shards of glass had been sorted into a trashcan, and she had somehow slept through the vacuuming of her entire kitchen.

Lena was speechless.

“When… how?” she asked.

“Oh,” Alex said, running her hand awkwardly through her short hair, “I had some time on my hand while you were asleep. I hope you don’t mind, I cleaned up a bit.”

“I…” Lena was lost for words, “thank you.”

Alex just nodded.

“Oh,” she suddenly remembered. She walked over to the fridge and produced a huge bowl filled with pieces of fruit. “I thought you might be hungry. You don’t have a lot of food in your fridge, so I had to improvise.”

She held up the bowl for Lena to see.

“Is this okay?” Alex looked a bit nervous, like she was scared she had overstepped or something.

Lena could only croak out a “that’s fine,” in response. In reality, she was so touched by Alex’s kind actions that she could barely find the words to thank her for them.

She slid up on one of the stools and leaned her elbows on her granite kitchen island. Alex pushed the bowl towards her, along with some eating utensils. Lena shot her a grateful smile, and dove in.

Alex went to sit on the opposite side of the counter, and studied Lena silently. After a couple of minutes of uncomfortable silence, only broken by Lena’s regular chewing, Lena finally mustered up the courage to say something.

“Why aren’t you at Kara’s?” she bit. She flinched, hearing the accusatory tone in her own voice. _Way to go Lena, really_ , piss off the one person who actually showed up to help.

Before she could apologise however, Alex replied: “I was at Kara’s last night before I came here,” she said conversationally, “she seemed pretty upset.”

Lena couldn’t help the feeling of satisfaction that bubbled up inside her.

 _Good_ , she thought.

Her face remained neutral, however, when she asked: “So what made you decide to swing by my place? Did you want to rub it in a little bit more?” she sneered.

Alex just threw her a look.

“Don’t do that,” she said, “don’t act like a bitch just for the sake of it. It’s beneath you.”

“What do you know about what’s beneath me?” Lena sneered. “Didn’t you lie right along with her, pretending we were actually friends?”

Alex ignored her.

“Kara was pretty upset last night, but I was reminded that she still had people around her to rely on. She can talk to her friends. You, on the other hand, and please don’t take this the wrong way, don’t really have an abundance of people to call about this.”

Lena bit her lip. She hated that Alex was right.

“So?” she snapped.

“So,” Alex explained, “I know it hasn’t always been smooth sailing between the two of us, but I do consider you my friend. I didn’t pretend for us to be anything. Think about it. Have we been best friends from the second you set foot in Kara’s apartment that day?”

Lena bit her lip.

She hated that Alex was right.

It had taken the older Danvers a long time to actually warm up to her, and even longer for them to actually form a relationship witch could be described as friendly. Alex had never pretended, because she never had to. She was clear about her mistrust of Lena from day one, and Lena had on the receiving end of a lot of jabs about Luthors and crime statistics. Yet somehow, after a long time, the two women had found that they had one thing in common; their absolute love for Kara Danvers and their desire to see her happy. Somehow, that affection for Kara brought them closer together too, and now, if Lena had to be completely honest with herself, she couldn’t imagine her life without Alex Danvers in it.

“I never pretended Lena. I consider you my friend. And I just thought you might need a friend right now. Was I wrong?” Alex asked with a raised eyebrow.

Instead of biting back, Lena surprised Alex.

“You consider me a friend?” Lena asked softly.

Alex’s eyes softened considerably. She looked like she wanted to come over and hug Lena close, and just barely constrained herself.

“Of course I do,” she whispered. “Lena,” she seemed to think for a bit, “there were times when, I felt like I couldn’t talk to anybody,” Lena opened her mouth to make a sarcastic comment, but Alex held up her hand, and Lena forced her remark down. “You don’t know this, but up until a few days ago, I didn’t even know Kara was Supergirl.”

Now that was news to Lena.

“What?” she croaked disbelievingly. “You worked alongside your sister for years and you never knew she was a freaking Alien?”

Now Lena had to admit she had been slow to find out that her best friend was a superhero/ alien menace, depending on what newspaper you read, but she still hadn’t lived with the woman in the same room for over ten years! How could Alex not know?

Alex shook her head. “That’s not what I said.”

Lena got more and more confused.

“Okay,” Alex said, “let’s start over.”

Alex explained the situation with Haley, leaving out no details. Neither Kara’s tearful goodbye, nor her own horrible behaviour towards Supergirl, not knowing that it was actually her sister. She explained what really went down between Kaznian Supergirl, Lex Luthor and her own sister in Midvale, all of which Lena soaked up breathlessly. Her heart ached at the thought that Kara had been on her own during Lex’s uprising, the anti-Alien movement, and of course, the anti-Supergirl campaign led by Ben Lockwood. She hated that Kara had been so alone, even when she had been surrounded by family and friends.

Only focussing on the pain of Kara’s betrayal could prevent Lena from running to Kara’s apartment, and knocking the door down to take Kara in her arms and holding her close.

Lena shook her head. That relationship was over now. They weren’t in the same place anymore. She would never hold Kara again, she would never touch Kara again. She hated Kara, and that’s what she was focussing on.

“So then I remembered. Everything. But that’s not what I wanted to talk about,” Alex said. “What really threw me off the minute I got my memories back, wasn’t how lonely Kara had been, but how _not_ lonely I had been. Lena,” Alex implored, leaning closer, “I was fine. I was okay. It didn’t feel like something was missing from my life. Do you want to know why?”

“Because you never remembered your sister was two different people?” Lena guessed.

Alex shook her head. “Because I wasn’t alone. Every step of the way, I had a friend with me. You.”

Lena unwillingly blushed.

“Whenever there was a problem, instead of contacting Supergirl like I always did, I contacted you. You were my friend, my confidante. I trusted you. I still do.”

Alex’s brown eyes bored into Lena’s own. Lena swallowed hard, and looked down at her hands.

“I know you’re mad. And I know part of that anger is directed at me. And I get that. But I would hate to lose my friend,” Alex said softly. “Unless that’s really what you want, but I don’t think it is.”

Lena shook her head slightly, and she could almost hear the smile in Alex’s voice when she spoke again.

“Do you want me to leave, Lena? Because I’d rather not. I’d rather stay with my friend than go back. Do you want that?”

Lena swallowed the tears she could feel trying to make their way to her eyes.

“No,” she whispered finally, “no I don’t want that. I want you to stay.”

She studied her fingernails closely, as if that would somehow mask the emotional pleas her words had exuded.

Alex smiled. “Okay,” she said. And just like that she diffused the emotional tension that still hung in the air. Lena needed a friend right now, not a therapist who was friends with the one person who had hurt her most. So that’s what Alex would be. A friend.

“Anything in particular you might want to do today?” Alex asked, stealing a piece of apple out of Lena’s bowl.

Lena groaned. “Yeah,” she answered, “to stay inside until this hangover nightmare has passed.”

Alex laughed. “Okay, I can do that. But can we then also buy you a new TV? Cause it’s my day off too, and I was planning on binging some series that have been collecting dust on my nightstand.”

Lena snorted. “Yeah, sure.” She threw Alex her phone. “Just click my personal shopper app, choose a TV and put it in my shopping basket,” she said disinterested.

Alex grasped the phone in her hands, and looked at Lena in disbelief.

“You have a personal shopper _app_?” she asked incredulously.

Lena shrugged. “Well yeah, I hate shopping. So I developed an app that would link with my personal shoppers’ phones, so I wouldn’t have to go out and buy things.”

At Alex’s bizarre expression, Lena huffed.

“I don’t know what to tell you, Alex, I’m lazy, okay? I hate shopping.”

Lena crossed her arms across her chest and looked away from Alex. She knew this had been a bad idea. She hated making new friends. At least Kara understood all her quirks and would – no. She wouldn’t even go there.

Then, all of a sudden, Alex began to laugh, and Lena turned to her in surprise.

“You are such a rich bitch sometimes,” Alex explained through her laughter. “In fact, you’re such a rich bitch that you decided to get a personal shopper app for you personal shoppers.”

Lena still didn’t get it.

Alex shook her head. “You’re too much sometimes.”

Lena still didn’t fully get Alex’s reaction, but she did see that Alex didn’t mean anything by it, and that she was genuinely amused by Lena’s antics. So, Lena smiled back, as Alex had her fun ordering a brand new TV – _“No way can I choose anyone of these, Lena, these are crazy expensive, are you sure, cause, oooh this one has a 3D setting!”_

After the whole phone debacle, the duo sat in silence for a bit, basking in their mutual newly-realised friendship and sharing some of the food Alex had prepared earlier on.

Lena smiled. This was comfortable and she liked it.

“Not to be rude or anything,” Alex said conversationally, effectively waking up Lena’s ‘ _see, here we go again, stop getting used to nice things’ attitude,_ “but your apartment really sucks.”

Well, that wasn’t what Lena had expected. In fact, that was something she took as a personal offence! More so than being accused of being a murderer just because of her familial relations. She had decorated the place herself, thank you very much! With some help from some private designers, but still! It was the exact opposite of her mother’s tastes, and it pissed off the Luthor Matriarch tremendously, so Lena was very proud of her place and showed it off in every magazine that would have pictures of it. She even submitted some herself one Christmas three years ago, just to spite her mother for hosting an anti-alien brunch.

“Excuse you,” Lena said indignantly, “my apartment is great, thank you very much. It’s up to date with the latest home trends, and it was featured in Forbes’s top ten most coveted places to live in National City,” she argued.

Alex shrugged. “That may be so, but it is the most boring, bland, impersonal place I have ever set foot in. Shouldn’t you at least put up some personal items? Like,” she blew a raspberry, “a painting or a picture or something?”

Lena frowned and regarded the room around her. Grey walls surrounding black and white furniture more designed to look good than to be comfortable. Her apartment looked good. Yeah it wasn’t as colourful an explosion as Kara’s was, but at least it was stylish, sleek and modern.

“I had pictures decorating my walls up until last night,” Lena said defensively. "It’s not my fault your first time seeing my apartment sober is after I’ve trashed the place.”

Alex laughed and Lena grinned right along with her.

“You know,” Lena said after a while, “there is one good thing about this situation, shitty as it might be.”

Alex shook her head, still smiling. “Okay,” she said eventually, “what is it?”

“Well,” Lena said, “at least now we know that all our secrets are out in the open.”

Alex nodded thoughtfully.

“There is literally nothing I’m keeping from you, nor you from me. I have nothing to hide anymore.”

“True,” Alex agreed, “everything is out in the open now. So we don’t have to lie to each other anymore. I can talk about everything with you, without having to first make sure I’m not accidentally revealing any sort of sensitive information.”

Alex left out the “about Supergirl” part. She figured it was a little too soon to talk about her sister’s alter ego right after Lena had gotten absolutely hammered to deal with said alter ego.

So, Alex left it out, and they smiled at each other before picking at the fruit salad again.

But before they could fully relax, they heard banging in the hallway leading to Lena’s apartment. Their heads snapped to the door.

Lena slid of the stool to stand next to Alex who had already whipped out her gun. They could make out muffled voices on the other side of the door. Whoever it was was getting closer. A key turned in a lock. They had a key to Lena’s place!

Lena felt sick again. Turns out, that even after a dozen attempts on her life, she still hadn’t gotten used to the feeling of impending death yet.

Then, the door swung open, Alex raised her gun to the door open, but before she could even yell at the intruder to drop whatever weapon they were carrying, in stormed Sam Arias in all her COO pantsuit glory, a sheepish looking Ruby Arias in tow. Alex’s mouth fell open, and she lowered her gun.

Sam’s eyes found Lena and Alex immediately.

“Lena Kieran Luthor!” she yelled, storming their way.

She appeared completely undeterred that a weapon had been aimed at her and her daughter mere seconds ago.

“What the hell do you mean Kara is Supergirl? You can’t just text me something like that and then not answer your phone!”

Alex had been putting her gun in her holster, but stiffened when she heard Sam’s words. She slowly turned her head towards Lena.

“You told Sam?” she shrieked.

Some details from last night came back to Lena, and something clicked. In all her drunken wisdom, Lena may or may not have thought that texting Sam about how her crush on Kara was doomed because of the latter’s secret superhero identity was a good idea. She hadn’t even known the text had actually sent. Maybe the millions of texts she’d seen on her screen should’ve clued her in.

She looked up at Alex with a tentative smile.

“Oops?”


	3. Chapter 3

Kara was exhausted.

Since she wasn’t hanging out with her sister or Lena, she had a lot of time on her hands. Too much time. Kara couldn’t stand being cooped up in her apartment without any distractions, so she’d quickly diverted her attention elsewhere.

She’d spent the last two weeks working tirelessly on any story she could try and get her hands on, whether they were simple fluff pieces, interesting business particles, or tough-crime stories. So far, she’d written about three cases of renter’s fraud, one article about the new summer collection of bicycles some company had put out, and a string of burglaries that terrorised one of the upper-class neighbourhoods of National City. Kara filled her nights chasing down criminals and saving the occasional cat stuck in a tree, until the first rays of sunlight illuminated National city in an effort to try and keep her mind occupied at all times.

Or more specifically, to keep her mind off of Lena Luthor.

She couldn’t say it had helped much. Thoughts of Lena spun around in her head constantly, forcing her to relive every horrible second of their last interaction.

She regretted everything. She regretted not speaking up more, she regretted not listening enough, she regretted letting Lena storm away, but also not giving Lena enough space… it was a nightmare. One that had left her mentally and physically exhausted up until the point she had to decline Alex’s requests for training sessions, because the older woman would freak out on her if she saw Kara.

Kara hadn’t slept more than three consecutive hours these last weeks, and it had started to wear on her. She hated going to sleep. Every night she dreaded the moment where National City would quiet down and every criminal apparently became too tired to cause any more mischief, which effectively sentenced her to rest.

Kara had always had trouble falling asleep on earth. Her first year on the blue planet, the noises were so loud and all-consuming that Kara could almost never fully relax. She’d only drifted in and out of consciousness, always alert.

Then there were the nightmares.

Even when Kara could find it in herself to sleep a couple of hours, her dreams were riddled with memories of Krypton, but never the good kind.

She could feel the heat underneath her feet again. The blisters that had become faded white scars on the soles of her feet over time hurt all over again. She could feel the pain of the burning air entering her lungs. She could hear the terrible screams of a suffering people on the verge of dying. She remembered the rumble of the biggest science buildings raining down on her, as the buildings collapsed, straining under the weight of a dying sun. The sickening cracks of Krypton’s surface separating from itself. The blackened hands of dying people grabbing at her ankles, pleading at her to take them with her. Her father’s booming voice as he called for her mother, and his strong arms, as he carried her over his shoulder, kicking the people she once knew – neighbours, teachers, friends – away from her. The desperation in her mother’s voice when she saw the destructed pods. The agony in her eyes when she realised there was only one viable pod left.

The nightmares were so terrible that Jeremiah and Eliza had been run ragged trying to calm the girl every night. Her screams had been so loud that the police had had to come by on three separate occasions upon receiving distressed phone calls from neighbours who though somebody might have been killed or hurt at the Danvers residence.

Ultimately, it had taken one grumpy, exhausted Alex Danvers to crawl into Kara’s bed muttering: “I need my sleep. So shut up, turn around and go back to bed. Don’t think this changes anything.”

They hadn't been friends back then, so that had been the warmest thing Alex had told her since she'd moved in.

And Alex had wrapped her arms around her alien sister, and Kara had felt weird. Comforted, like when her mother had wrapped her up in a soft blanket in winter. Kara never felt cold anymore, but Alex’s embrace made her feel warmer and safer than she’d ever had on earth. And that was the first time she’d slept until the sun had come up the next morning.

Jeremiah and Eliza were so surprised to have been woken up by their alarm and not Kara’s cries, that they at first thought something horrible had happened. They had raced to Kara and Alex’s room in a fit of panic. They’d thrown open the door, still in their pyjamas – though Jeremiah had grabbed his old antique ballonet from its usual place above the mantle piece, Lord knows what he was going to do with that – and stormed into the girls’ bedroom.

When they came in though, they were surprised to find their two daughters together in Kara’s bed, arms wrapped around each other, front to front, as if they were hugging giant stuffed animals.

The girls hadn’t woken up, but Eliza had been so emotional to see the two girls who usually butted heads about everything so calm and sweet together that she took a series of pictures. She still had them somewhere in a photo album, along with one of Jeremiah looking sheepish in his blue and white striped pyjamas, and his ballonet held loosely in his hand.

Ever since that night, Kara’d slept with Alex in the same bed up until the older girl left for college. The nightmares had long stopped before that, but it had become such a habit that they never thought it necessary to stop. Even today, when Kara experienced nightmares, she would just call Alex, or even just fly into her sister’s room, and hide away in her warm embrace.

Except now though, Alex was spending more time with Lena. And even though Kara knew Alex would drop everything to come to her if she would just call, Kara knew she couldn’t do that. She didn’t want to cut into the Alex – Lena bonding time, as she liked to call it. They needed each other.

Alex had sent some texts during these last weeks, but they had been sparse, with absolutely no information about Lena at all. The only thing Kara knew for sure, was that Alex had been talking to Lena regularly, and that they were still friends. One the one hand she was happy Alex wouldn’t just betray Lena’s trust and spill all her secrets, but on the other hand she was just so desperate for some scraps of information that she wasn’t above begging her sister for a single text message about how Lena was doing.

Which was good, Kara reasoned, they needed a Kara Danvers break.

But it did mean, that when her Krypton nightmares suddenly came back at full force, Kara struggled. She didn’t know what to do. It had been such a long time since she’d relived those vivid horrors, that her body didn’t quite remember how to attack those memories again. She knew she used to have coping mechanisms, but those were so long ago! Plus, her nightmares had always tied into the fears Kara had of being all alone and new to this planet. The cultural shock of having to go to an American high school, learning how to control her strength and powers… That was all so long ago! She didn’t even know why her memories had come back all of a sudden.

She did have a small inkling that maybe, just maybe, the nightmares had something to do with Kara’s fear of abandonment being stirred up again by a recent event in her life, but she quickly discarded the thought.

She wouldn’t blame Lena for this. That was unfair. She just had to deal with it like a grown-up.

So, Kara decided that instead of sleeping and reliving all those terrible, horrible things, she’d rather be out fighting the good fight, or working for CatCo. Unfortunately, her body didn’t agree with her. It was starting to show all the signs of an organism in desperate need of peace and rest.

Her usually flawless skin started to get irritated more and more, she was sporting purplish bags under her eyes, and her eyes were bloodshot from looking at her laptop too much. In a fight, she bruised more easily, her knuckles weren’t bleeding yet, but they became red enough for Kara to be at least slightly – and if she were Alex, and Alex knew about it, extremely – concerned. At work – to Snapper’s great disdain – she tired more easily, nodding off in important meetings, and was prone to losing important trains of thought, so much so, that even Nia had become concerned.

“Are you sure you’re okay, Kara?” she’d asked one day at work, leaning down conspiratorially towards her mentor, “because you look kind of…” she trailed off, trying to think of a word that sounded like horrible, but softened the message considerably. “Different?” she tried carefully.

Kara threw her a look. Nia put up her hands in defence.

“I’m just saying, if it has something to do with you-know-who and the you-know-what secret, you should totally just talk to her!” she said cheerily.

Kara felt her mood drop considerably at the mention of Lena. Nia was still optimistic that everything was going to be fine, and Kara didn’t have the heart to break it to her that Lena had told her she never wanted to see her again. To keep up the ruse, Kara tried to give the girl a reassuring smile. Glancing at Nia’s shocked expression, however, she assumed it hadn’t had the desired effect. She sighed, giving up on trying to give a good expression.

“I’m fine, Nia. I just haven’t been sleeping well. Work,” she gestured, “crime. You know the drill.”

Nia’s eyes widened, and she nodded feverishly.

“Oh, yeah, sure! I know all about it. Being a superhero and all. A-and having a day job. Of course I know what you mean. But hey,” she said excitedly, and Kara groaned inwardly.

Any other day, she would be just as enthusiastic as Nia, and would encourage the girl to be excited with her, but the absence of Lena in her life, paired with the exhaustion of the last two weeks, sort of made Nia’s cheeriness unbearable. She guessed she finally found out why Snapper was always driven insane by her cheery upbeat demeanour.

“If you need some help,” Nia continued, “I’d be glad to give you a hand, though! I could stun people.”

She gasped.

“Or maybe you could suspend me from your suit, and we could fly, and you could like, drop me in the middle of an active crime scene, and we could…”

Kara managed to tune her out, and focussed on the problem at hand. It had been two weeks since the fight, and she had respected Lena’s wishes not to contact her. She wanted to make sure that Lena knew that Kara was prepared to do whatever it took to get into Lena’s good graces again. Unfortunately, this was a pretty crappy way of restoring their friendship.

By having absolute. Radio. Silence.

And it sucked, because Kara needed to talk to Lena. She wanted to tell Lena how much she loved her, and how sorry she was, but she couldn’t.

Lena had also failed to show up at CatCo for two weeks, which was entirely out of character. James wouldn’t tell her anything. He’d shown up one Monday with such a dark expression on her face, that Kara hadn’t even had to come up to him to know Lena had talked to him. She was sure it hadn’t been pretty. James looked okay for the rest of the week, though. Not that she would know. James refused to tell her anything. Every day when he showed up, she dashed towards his office, trying to pry some information from him, but he had remained silent. He didn’t look worried, so Kara guessed Lena hadn’t something incredibly spontaneous like sell CatCo and making a run for it.

Things had to be okay.

Kara bit her lip anxiously.

“… Kara? Kara, are you even listening to a word I – ”

Kara jumped up when she heard the ding of the bell, and saw James in the opening of the elevator doors.

“Sorry, Nia,” she yelled over her shoulder. She heard Nia grumble, but couldn’t bring herself to care too much, because James was there, and maybe today he had fresh information. The weekend had just passed after all, and Lena was known to email her employees with important news on Sunday evenings.

James sighed when he saw Kara run towards him. He made his way to his office, completely ignoring his junior reporter shouting his name.

“James,” Kara gasped, out of breath when she entered his office. “Hey, I just wanted to ask – awtch!”

Kara gasped in pain when she bumped her hip against the corner of the coffee table in James’ office. James looked up immediately when he heard Kara’s exclamation.

“Oh my God, Kara!” He rushed over to her, and guided her closer to him.

Kara rubbed the spot on her hip. A sharp pain shot up her thigh, and she inhaled deeply through her teeth. For a second, Kara was paralysed with fear when she realised someone could have shot kryptonite through the open glass of CatCo’s office, but she quickly reassured herself. There was no hole in the window, and Kryptonite hurt way more than whatever this was.

Which did beg the question: what was it?

James looked from the corner table to Kara’s hip and he frowned deeply. After searching for consent in her eyes, Kara nodded, and he gently and tentatively lifted up her blouse. Right above the hemline of her jeans, a purpling, angry-looking bruise shone brightly. She gingerly reached down and poked it with her finger just to feel a dull, painful throbbing.

“Awtch,” she said surprised.

“Oh my God, Kara, this is bad! You’re bruising!” James said.

Kara frowned, looking at the bruise as if it was purposefully trying to inconvenience her.

“You blew out your powers!” James realised still holding up her blouse. His tone was panicky, and not at all reassuring, which wasn’t exactly helping Kara right now. “How the hell did you manage to do that?”

“I don’t know,” Kara mumbled half to herself, “I guess I have been overworking myself a bit, but I didn’t think it would really harm me – ”

Honestly, the thought of having blown out her powers didn’t upset her as much as she thought it would. She felt oddly calm, even somewhat… relieved? She was almost human, almost normal for a short period of time. That never happened to her.

Okay, so maybe she needed to rethink her priorities a little bit. Apparently stopping too much crime could have consequences that may or may not make Alex’s head explode, but in hindsight –

James rubbed the back of his head while she was talking, and suddenly stiffened. “Oh God,” he said, paler than Kara had ever seen him, “we’re going to have to tell Alex.”

Kara almost rolled her eyes at James’ behaviour. He had been friends with Alex for years now, and he still almost pooped his pants every time Alex would do as much as narrow her eyes at him. Sure, Kara wasn’t exactly looking forward to having the news about her having blown out her powers being the first thing she got to say to Alex face-to-face, but she was kind of miffed that James was so keen on over-exaggerating.

“James,”

“You have to get to the D.E.O. immediately, they need to put you under a sunlamp right now! God, Kara, this is serious!”

Kara opened her mouth to argue, but right before she could, a cold all-too familiar voice asked:

“Am I interrupting something?”

Kara and James’s heads whipped around to see Lena Luthor in CatCo’s office, clad in a skin-tight, professional black dress, paired with her favourite black Louboutins, arms crossed across her chest, and one signature eyebrow arched to perfection. It was the first time Kara had seen Lena in a almost half a month, and she couldn’t help the way her heart soared at the sight of her.

It had been too long.

Lena looked gorgeous. Her hair was in a tight bun; her make-up was impeccable, with a killer red lip finish. She was wearing her favourite pearl earrings, and her heels were tall and thin enough to be classified as a murder weapon. She looked ready to ‘slay the day away,’ like Kara always used to joke with her.

Used to.

Seeing Lena like that made Kara feel slightly self-conscious about her own appearance. Lena had always been classier and prettier in every way according to Kara, but they had never had to compete. Lena would always brush off Kara’s compliments by saying she had the money to pay for the fancy outfits, and that Kara was just as beautiful, if not more beautiful than her. She would compliment Kara’s eyes, or her cheekbones, and she would often say that Kara looked like the personification of sunshine.

Lena had always made Kara feel like the prettiest girl in the room.

Now though, it was painfully obvious who had been dealing with their friend-breakup – as Kara liked to call it – the best. Lena looked like a corporate goddess, while Kara, in her blue sweater, blouse and jeans, gave off more of a sleep-deprived student vibe. Kara knew Lena would never say anything about it, but Kara almost felt like rushing home to get an outfit change.

“Lena,” Kara exclaimed. James quickly dropped her blouse.

“It’s not what it looks like,” he said quickly.

Kara frowned. “What does it look like?” she asked confused.

Lena rolled her eyes. Kara frowned when she saw the reaction. Lena never used to mind that Kara sometimes missed cues that others found so evident. She always used to joke that Kara was too innocent for her own good, but she never made fun of it. Was this Lena making fun of her? Or being mean to her? Before Kara could figure it out, Lena spoke again.

“It was my understanding,” she said calmly “that on Monday mornings, the reporters assemble in this very office to discuss the hot news topics of this week’s magazine. Am I correct?”

“Yes Miss Luthor,” James said quickly, and Kara frowned at the official use of Lena’s name. When did that change happen? “I’ve just arrived, and Miss Danvers here had a question, and – ”

“A question that couldn’t wait until _after_ the staff meeting?” Lena asked.

Kara flinched at the coldness in her friend’s voice. She never would’ve said such a thing before. She always liked it when Kara came in first thing in the morning to give her a coffee and have a pre-work chat. But now…

“Since it’s,” Lena looked at her watch, “9:01 at the dot, I suggest you call your team in her for a meeting instead of racking up a harassment suit, wouldn’t you say that would be advisable, Mister Olsen?” the condescension dripped from Lena’s voice, and Kara flushed in James’ place.

James mumbled something, before pressing the intercom button, and calling the news team to his office. Kara did her very best to study the individual pieces of fabric of the carpet beneath her shoes, and not draw attention to herself.

“I want the editors grouped together next to the reporters, sorted by specialty, and then the art and fashion people, to have an efficient flow in the meeting,” Lena decided, having already moved on from the previous conversation and tapping away on an iPad she’d produced from out of nowhere.

James scratched his throat. Lena looked up at him with a frown.

“You have something to say, Mister Olsen?” she asked.

“I, um, just wanted to let you know that I’ve advised Kara here to go home.”

Lena’s eyes snapped to Kara, and Kara had never wanted to sink through the floor more.

She also never hated James more. How dare he disturb her state of non-existence?

“I see,” Lena drawled sceptically. “Might I inquire as to why?” Her sharp eyes scanned Kara from head to toe.

James coughed. “She’s sick, she needs to get special care.”

Lena’s eyes snapped up to Kara’s face. “She seems fine to me,” she said, eyes cold.

Kara shuffled closer to James, trying to render herself invisible.

“It’s fine, James,” she mumbled from behind James’ back.

“No it’s not,” James turned to Kara, “you need to go home.”

“I think,” Lena said in a clipped tone while the other employees started pouring in, “that if Miss Danvers wants to go home perfectly healthy while pretending to be sick, she can go home. But then she shouldn’t bother coming in tomorrow.”

Kara’s mouth fell open, and James started to protest, but Lena cut him off before he could even start.

“And if you, as her employer, can’t control her, Mister Olsen,” she bit, “then maybe you should consider the same thing as well.”

James fell silent next to Kara. Lena gave them one last loathing look before turning to her other employees, and greeting them with her business smile. James pushed Kara gently towards Snapper, Nia – who looked at her with pity in her big eyes – and the other reporters. Nia put a supportive hand on Kara’s shoulder, but slid it off the second Lena’s eyes landed on it. Even Nia wasn’t willing to invoke Lena’s wrath today.

Kara didn’t hear a word of the meeting. Lena’s hurtful words danced around in her head. Kara had been so relieved to see Lena again, to hear her voice again, and to make up. But that hadn’t happened. Lena had been ready to _fire_ Kara. Her friend. Maybe Kara had been holding onto the idea that Lena would come back around and that they would somehow make up, and go back to how things were before. But Lena was here. And she didn’t want to talk. In fact, she was ready to destroy the part of Kara that made her Kara. That made her human.

She barely heard Lena’s closing words. When the meeting ended, Kara was so upset, she didn’t even notice. Nia laid a hand on Kara’s arm, and tugged her out the door. Kara went, not even bothering to glance in Lena’s direction.

Lena was ready to fire her.

Kara let go of Nia, and ran to the bathroom. She started crying the second she locked the door behind her.

* * *

Lena saw Kara’s retreating back, and she instantly felt a wave of guilt wash over her. Should she go after Kara? She’d looked so cute today, if not a little tired. And God, if Lena hadn’t wanted to run after her to grab her, and hold her close, and whisper things in her hair, and never, ever let her go again.

Lena blinked the offending thoughts away.

No.

Kara had lied to her, repeatedly. She wasn’t going to let that alien make her feel guilty because she was being a decent boss. She was in the right here. Not Kara. Not now, not ever.

And to think she’d actually planned on talking to Kara today to _apologise_. Seeing James and Kara together had just… thrown her off. Logically, she knew Kara would never get together with James for many reasons, one of which was her belief that there was such a thing as “hoes before bros,” even if she thought the statement to be sexist and derogatory.

But what the hell, Kara had also said that she would never do anything to jeopardise their friendship, and that particular belief definitely hadn’t aged well.

So Lena shook it off, straightened her shoulders, and got back to work.

* * *

On Tuesday morning, Kara’s powers hadn’t returned yet, despite having spent three hours after work last night lying on the sunbed. Like she always did when she woke up powerless, she regretted never having appreciated her powers enough before. Kara woke up, and her entire body ached. Her neck felt like it had been tied up like one of those balloon animals, and someone had forgotten to untangle it back to its natural position.

The only good thing about being powerless, she supposed, was having been able to sleep through the night like a baby. She hadn’t been woken up by any alarms or bank robberies like she always did, and she had enjoyed the silence tremendously. She’d even been able to dream about something else than Krypton.

When she glanced at her alarm, however, her heart stopped.

It was 8:44.

Her eyes widened comically, and she sat up straight.

She’d forgotten to change the alarm yesterday. She only had fifteen minutes to get dressed, get breakfast and get to work on time. Normally, that would leave her with time to spare, but in her human state, everything would take her infinitely longer.

Kara dashed out her bed, tripping over the clothes she’d left on her bedroom floor last night, and bumping in to every piece of furniture she owned. She was half convinced some of those pieces just hadn’t been there yesterday and had grown in her apartment overnight just to mess with her.

Kara grabbed one of her sundresses from the rack, and threw it over her head, for once in her life not worried about ripping the fabric. She grabbed her brown leather bag from the floor, and ran out her apartment.

She made it to CatCo, only being five minutes late. Unfortunately, having run to catch the bus, and from her arrival stop to CatCo, her body had been through a lot. Her hair stuck to her neck and forehead in damp strings and she was gasping painfully. Her knees were going to give out any minute now, and she thanked Rao, God, Jesus, Mohammed and whatever other deity was listening up above for the invention of the elevator.

She finally reached the top floor, and jogged to James’ office.

She made it. Kara closed the glass door behind her, and sagged against it gratefully, closing her eyes for a second.

“Miss Danvers, how nice of you to join us.”

Kara’s eyes sprung open, and she saw that James’ office was full with all the editors and journalists from CatCo. And right in the middle, of course, was Lena.

“Oh, um, R-Gosh, I’m sorry, Miss Luthor,” Kara said. “I didn’t realise we were going to be having a second editorial meeting today. We usually only have those on Mondays. Which was yesterday. Since we’re Tuesday now.”

Nice save, Kara, really eloquent. She mentally patted herself on the back.

“Really?” Lena raised her eyebrows. Uh oh. Not good. Behind Lena, James brought his hand up to cover his eyes in a faceplant.

Definitely not good.

“Because I could’ve sworn I insisted on it multiple times during yesterday’s meeting. But maybe you weren’t as present as you claimed to be,” Lena added coldly.

“I’m sorry, I’m – ”

“Moving on,” Lena interrupted her, and Kara felt like someone had just punched her in the stomach, “I want Jefferson to cover the house fire story – you did great work on the family dispute last week. Carlson, you’re on the Lockwood case, his prosecution, developments in the case and so on, and finally,” she didn’t even look up from her iPad, “Danvers, you will be handling the Andrea Rojas interview. That will be all for this morning, dismissed,” Lena said.

“Um, excuse me, Miss Luthor?”

Kara wanted to punch herself for that line. Even more so when Lena’s head snapped up to look at her with narrowed eyes, while the CatCo reporters stopped filling out, and turned to follow the conversation.

“Is there a problem, Miss Danvers?” she asked, eyes trained on Kara.

Kara couldn’t shake the uncomfortable feeling she got when Lena was staring straight into her eyes. It was like those green eyes had her all figured out, and there was no escaping the extreme scrutiny she was under.

Kara swallowed hard. “Um, no ma’am, it’s just that, um, I was assigned to another case?” She looked to James for help, but he seemed to be looking anywhere but at her.

Traitor.

“And what case might that be, Miss Danvers?” Lena asked coldly.

Oh Rao she was going to go out and make her say it.

“I’m usually in charge of the, uh, Supergirl stories? And, well, there’ve been some interesting encounters that sparked the interest of – ”

“Yes, I’ve scrapped the Supergirl stories for this week’s CatCo’s magazine,” Lena cut her off.

Kara was stunned. “You – um, you don’t think… you don’t want to continue our, um, Supergirl brand – ”

Lena shook her head, and gathered her things.

“No, Miss Danvers,” she said, walking towards the door opening, a sea of reporters separating to let her through, “Supergirl is not our brand. National city and its inhabitants are our brand. We’re not a Supergirl fan magazine.” She turned and looked at Kara one more time. “Right now, there’s a new inhabitant in National City. You’re a reporter. You go and report it. Do you understand me?”

Kara shut up, and looked down at the floor. She fiddled with her glasses, and nodded once.

Lena said goodbye to James, and left the office, heading for L-Corp.

Kara turned towards James, who looked at her with pity in his eyes. Kara wiped her eyes with her sleeve, and shuffled closer to his desk.

“So,” she said, trying to sound steadier than she felt, “Andrea Rojas? Am I supposed to know who that is?”

James smiled wryly.

“Yeah,” he rubbed the back of his head, “you’re going to have a tough time with that one.” He grabbed a file from his desk and slid it over to Kara. “Andrea Rojas, CEO of Rojas Fashion Industries, she’s rich, very well-known, and extremely elusive.”

Kara studied the photo in front of her.

It was a vague paparazzi picture, taken from afar, but the figure in the picture was clear. The woman was gorgeous. She had light brown hair, piercing blue eyes, and she sported an arrogant smirk. Kara frowned. The woman looked… strange. Fancy, like Miss Grant had, but strangely more unlikable. Kara instantly felt guilty for judging the woman from a picture, and berated herself for it. She swore she would keep an open mind when she got to meet her.

“So far, she’s only talked to the press twice. Once when she started out as COO of a different company, and a couple of months ago, when she launched her fashion empire here in National City.”

Kara looked up from the photo. “But CatCo managed to snag an interview with her?” Kara asked. James looked a little guilty at that.

“Well, um, that’s what I wanted to tell you.”

Kara dropped the file on her desk.

“No,” she said disbelievingly, “I have to convince this woman to give me an interview? You haven’t booked anything yet?”

“I know, I know,” James said, rushing to close the door, blocking the sound for curious onlookers. “I know it’s not ideal,”

“Ideal?” Kara shrieked. “This is impossible! You just said she was – ”

“I know what I said,” James’ booming voice shut Kara right up.

She took a step back, and looked at him with big eyes. He never yelled at her at work. He never tried to use his power as her boss over her. James didn’t do that. He wouldn’t.

In his defence, James seemed to almost instantly regret his outburst. His shoulders dropped and he sighed.

“I know what I said, okay?” He rubbed the back of head and closed his eyes. “I don’t like it either. But Lena – I mean Miss Luthor – wants you on this case, so I have no choice. It’s just that things are a bit… tense right now.”

Kara could only agree with that. She hadn’t made a move to get closer to James again.

“Miss Luthor has decided on taking on more responsibilities at CatCo, so, there’s a lot of pressure right now to perform better, you hear me?”

Kara nodded. She understood perfectly what was happening at CatCo. Lena was making a statement. A statement to show off just how powerful she was, and just how miserable she could make the lives of those who had disrespected her. It made Kara feel guilty. James was probably in the first line of fire being Kara’s friend and confidant, and having lied to Lena for the entire duration of their relationship. He was obviously under a lot of stress, and it was all Kara’s fault.

“Just…” James rubbed his head in frustration, “just try and call to get an interview, okay? If there’s anyone who can get an interview from that woman, it’s you.”

James’ expression softened, and he smiled his famous boyish grin that showed off his perfect white teeth. It used to remind Kara just why she’d fallen for him in the first place, but now she just associated his grin with Lena’s presence and it filled her with sadness.

Nevertheless, she put on a smile, and said: “Okay. I’ll get right on that,” and turned on her heel to get out of his office.

* * *

As it turned out, getting an interview with Andrea Rojas was basically an impossible feat. James wasn’t lying about the whole elusive thing. The woman was impossible to contact. At the end of the day, Kara was ready to pull her own hair out and throw her phone all the way down from Cat’s balcony. She had spent the entire day being kept on hold by Miss Rojas’s nine (!) different assistants, who all told her to ‘just hang on’ and were waiting for some other department’s assistant to give them more information on whether or not they would _consider_ her interview request.

When five ‘o clock finally rolled around, Kara was beat. Her head hurt from making all those stupid phone calls, she was hungry because she skipped lunch in favour of waiting by the phone on one of the assistants who “was so close to getting you the answer, Miss Danvers, just hold on,” but most of all, she was cranky. She had not accomplished a single thing that day. She hadn’t written a single word, hadn’t taken a single interview. She hadn’t felt like less than a reporter in years.

“I’m leaving the office for today, Miss Danvers, would you mind calling us again tomorrow?”

The latest of a long string of assistants – Kathy, from Fashion and Development – gave Kara her last discouraging message of the day. She sounded annoyed. Kara couldn’t blame her. She’d probably hoped to do better things than call an incessant reporter all day too.

Kara sighed, and rubbed the space in between her eyebrows with closed eyes.

“Yes, Kathy, thank you,” Kara answered, knowing full well it wasn’t Kathy’s fault she’d had such a shitty day. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Great,” the voice on the other end of the line said, “good night.”

“Good n – ”

But the line had already gone dead.

Kara shook her head, before standing up and gathering her things. This day had been a complete and utter waste of her time. When she’d buttoned up her coat, and collected her bag, she swung by James’ office to tell him it hadn’t worked out but that she was trying again tomorrow. He gave her a weak smile and a wave before looking down at the spreadsheets on his desk with a frown. Kara didn’t envy him at all. When she was still Miss Grant’s assistance, it had been her job to double check important documents like that because Miss Grant didn’t trust others to do it for her.

James was different.

He felt that, as the chief of CatCo, he was the one responsible for any mistakes that might have been made. Therefor, he always stayed late to go over every detail, making sure nothing was out of order.

Kara smiled. He really had come a long way.

She took one last look at James before heading home. She felt her phone buzz in her bag, and took it out. She had a message from Alex apologising, because she wouldn’t be able to make it to sister’s night tonight.

In all truth, Kara was so tired, she had forgotten about it entirely. She shot back a text saying it was okay, and they could just postpone it, before bringing her hand back to her head. Her head was pounding and her stomach was starting to feel queasy. Man, she should really get something to eat. This whole fasting thing was a pain when she wasn’t fully superpowered.

* * *

Kara’s next couple of days did not improve at all. For starters, on Wednesday she woke up with the same headache from the day before. It hadn’t gone away. In fact, it felt even more painful than before. She got dressed in a thin flower dress with one of her trusty old cardigans, checked for messages from Lena – there never were any, but Kara kept holding out hope – and headed to CatCo. For the first time in forever, Kara willingly skipped breakfast. She strangely enough did not feel hungry at all. She guessed it had something to do with the inordinate amount of potstickers she had consumed the night before. She had made the mistake of ordering the same amount she always did, and she could only assume her stomachache was her body’s version of rolling its eyes at her.

The rest of her day went the exact same as it had the day before. Numerous phone calls to various assistants and interns whose names Kara now knew by heart filled her day, and Kara was sad to report that if it weren’t for some department emails, she wouldn’t even have had to open her laptop in the first place.

Wednesday, just like Tuesday was left without any typing. Kara was embarrassed to say, that while she was on the phone with said assistants, she had spent most of her time doodling away in one of the many notebooks Eliza had gifted her throughout the years. She made no progress whatsoever, because instead of just flat-out telling Kara where she could shove her interview, the people from Rojas Fashion Industries kept promising her more news, and more contact with people who could actually confirm or deny interview requests.

And round and round they went.

Kara had repeated her request over and over, until even she got sick of her own voice. Kara was going absolutely insane. Her head was throbbing, her queasiness hadn’t gone away, and someone must have changed the temperature in the office, which led to her being overheated and sweaty.

Kara huffed.

She wasn’t getting anywhere, and she was starting to resent James and Lena for forcing her to do this interview. A small, dark part of Kara had even wondered if this was Lena’s way of punishing her. Andrea Rojas and her moved in the same circles, didn’t they? Lena had to know how infamous the woman was for dodging every attempt of the media to get close. She’d have to have known that trying to get an interview with that woman was like asking Cat Grant to wear one of Kara’s more colourful cardigans to an award show.

Kara quickly shook her head and dialled another number. No, Lena would never do that to her, and it was horrible of her to even go so far as to think she would. Lena was hurt, but she wasn’t mean. She was sweet, and good, and soft. And Kara would get that interview, make it the greatest interview CatCo had ever published, and Lena would be grateful, and maybe she would even talk to Kara again.

With renewed energy, Kara perked up when the line connected.

“Hi, this is Kara Danvers from CatCo World Wide Media. I was calling as per Jane Tennison’s advice. She told me to contact you in regard to an interview I was hoping to obtain with your CEO. I understand that – ”

* * *

When Kara finally got home, an angry looking Alex Danvers greeted her. Kara sighed deeply before putting on yet another smile, and welcoming her sister

“Hey Alex – ”

“Don’t you ‘hey Alex’ me!” Alex said angrily.

Kara’s smile dropped and she sighed, resigning herself to her fate. There was no appeasing her sister when she was in one of those moods. Instead, she produced her key from her bag, and opened the door for them both.

“You hungry?” Kara asked before making her way over to the fridge.

Food certainly wouldn’t make her sister forget all about her anger, but it couldn’t make her mood worse either, so Kara took her chances.

“You have been powerless for three days, and you only went to the sunbed once?” Alex exclaimed accusingly. “How could you be so irresponsible, Kara?”

Kara stared into her fridge, but her stomach turned at every possible meal she could find. Should she just order something to eat?

“And on top of that,” Alex shrieked, “I had to hear it from James? You didn’t tell me you were at the D.E.O. to get some sunlight? You were keeping me in the dark about everything!”

Her voice was growing louder with every accusation.

“You were keeping it from me?”

Hearing those all too familiar words, Kara stiffened.

“You were going behind my back, Kara, and it’s not cool! You can’t just keep this secret from me!”

Suddenly, Kara snapped.

“I wasn’t keeping anything from you!”

Kara had turned around so quickly; even Alex was shocked and took a step back.

“I have a life, Alex, and sometimes it gets a little busy! Sometimes I don’t get around to texting you!” Kara yelled. All the pent-up frustration from the last couple of days seemed to come out all at once. “I blew out my powers, so I went to the sunbed. You weren’t there. I’m sorry for not asking your permission for every single thing that happens in my life!”

Alex paled.

“I know you think being a superhero is all I do, but I have a job too! I know it doesn’t mean much to you, but it does to me! I have to do so much, and no,” Kara yelled. “No, I didn’t have time to just lie down on a freaking sunbed, just so I might get better a little faster! So maybe you could just back. Off!”

When she finished her rant, Kara suddenly felt lightheaded, and swayed a little on her feet before gripping the granite counter tightly. Black spots started appearing before her eyes, making the world blurry. Kara angrily forced them away until she could see clearly again. Her head was pounding to the rhythm of her heart. It was too fast, too painful.

She wiped her brow with the back of her head. Rao, it was hot in her apartment.

Kara turned to look at her sister, and her stomach sank. One look at Alex’s shocked face, and Kara instantly regretted yelling at her.

It wasn’t her fault Kara’s life was shitty at the moment. It wasn’t her fault Lena was treating her like garbage. It wasn’t her fault she’d had a headache for days now, and even the smell of food made her nauseous.

“Alex, I-I’m sorry, I didn’t,”

Alex rushed over to her in fraction of a second.

“No, Kara, I’m sorry, God. Are you okay?”

Alex took Kara’s trembling hands, and pulled her down softly towards the floor. When they were seated, Kara leaned against the fridge, and let her eyes close. Rao, her head hurt.

“I’m sorry Kara, I know you’re busy, I didn’t mean to imply – I didn’t want to yell at you.”

As much as Kara appreciated Alex’s apologies, the cold of the fridge was doing wonders to her head, and Alex’s voice was kind of doing the opposite.

“Alex,” Kara interrupted her sister, “it’s fine. I just had a crappy week is all.”

Alex fell silent.

When Kara didn’t hear a retort, she frowned and turned her head towards her sister, opening one eye to look at her.

Alex looked guilty. She was chewing her lip, and her eyes were trained on the floor.

“Alex?”

Alex didn’t look up. “Yeah,” she said, “You’ve had a bad week, I know. I heard about it a little.”

Kara frowned. “You heard about it? Who told you? Was it – ” Kara stopped talking. She looked at Alex. “Oh,” she mumbled noncommittally.

Of course. Lena. They were friends now. It was only logical that Alex would have heard about it.

“You’ve been talking to Lena.” It wasn’t so much a question as it was a statement.

“Only because you told me to!” Alex countered defensively.

“I know, I know,” Kara said holding up your hands.

They both fell silent again.

Kara bit her lip trying not to ask the questions she could feel burning on her tongue. She just wanted to know so badly.

“So, um, how has she been?” Kara asked tentatively.

Alex sighed, closing her eyes.

“She’s been… okay,” Alex decided. “Obviously she’s still very mad,” Kara flinched inwardly at that, “but other than that, she’s good. She started talking to Sam again.”

“Oh,” that was surprising, “that’s great.”

It wasn’t great. In fact, it was very _un_ -great. Kara tried to ignore the jealousy she felt rising up inside of her. She had no right to claim Lena as her best friend anymore. Hell, she had no right to claim Lena as even just a _friend_ anymore. As far as Lena was concerned, Kara was just another faceless employee of hers, with no ties to her boss, whatsoever.

Still it stung.

Kara had been there for Lena from the start. Right when she was taking over L-Corp, facing scrutiny from the press and the citizens of National City on top of dealing with her murderous family. Where was Sam then? What was she doing to help Lena?

Kara knew it wasn’t fair. Sam had her daughter to think of, and she didn’t have the job she does now, so she couldn’t afford to be with Lena all the time, but still! Lena could’ve used a friend back then, and the only one she found was a green-behind-the-ears, stubborn, mousy, wannabe reporter.

But Lena hadn’t cared in the slightest about any of that. She loved every quirk Kara presented, laughed along to all of her silly antics – even when she once tried balancing an egg on her the bridge of her glasses, which ended in a big mess, which made Lena laugh so hard she got a stomach ache – and never belittled her for anything.

But that wasn’t the point. The point was that Sam was back, that Lena needed a friend, and that that friend just happened to be one of the most beautiful, amazing, smart creatures in the entire universe.

Kara sighed. Of course she was jealous. She was even jealous of Alex, who could still talk to Lena, who could still soak up her amazingness and wonderfulness, that was Lena Luthor, and Rao, she just really missed Lena.

“That’s good,” Kara croaked.

Alex threw her an unimpressed look.

Kara rolled her eyes. “Okay, yeah, maybe I’m a little jealous, but she needs a friend. Friends. Like,” she waved her hand, “multiple friends. It’s good. For her.”

Alex sighed, but didn’t comment, which Kara was grateful for. She rubbed her head. Her headache was really getting out of control. She just wanted to go to bed and sleep it off. Hopefully her powers would be back the next morning, and she could go on with her normal, superpowered life.

“There is one thing I should probably tell you,” Alex suddenly said.

Kara opened her eyes. “What is it?”

Alex turned towards Kara.

“It’s not good,”

Kara’s eyes widened. That phrase was never a good sign when it came out of Alex’s mouth.

“Sam knows.”

* * *

When Alex finally left for the night, Kara felt miserable.

On top of her body breaking down on her, the entire ‘Sam and Ruby know’ situation was a giant headache in and on itself. Alex didn’t exactly divulge many details, but Kara knew Lena had something to do with it. The last hour of Alex’s visit had been filled with ranting about too many people knowing her secret, and ranting about how Lena had been too careless, but honestly, at this point Kara was too tired to care.

So Sam knew. Whatever. Sam wasn’t her best friend who now hated her guts. Sam wasn’t the one who would refuse to ever see her again.

Alex had assured her she had now forced both of them to sign a very thorough NDA – Ruby was underage and couldn’t legally be held accountable by the D.E.O. but she had apparently been very serious about the entire situation – and they wouldn’t divulge her identity to anyone else.

Kara shook her head, and stood up from the couch on shaky legs. She didn’t want to know. She didn’t care anymore. Lena was important. Lena knowing her secret was important. Everything else was just… extra. Details.

She shivered despite herself, and frowned. She’d turned the temperature down in her apartment because she had been too hot, Alex had even complained about the new thermostat setting, but now she suddenly felt extremely cold. Wrapping her arms around herself, Kara shakily made her way over to her bathroom. A piping hot shower ought to warm her up.

Twenty godly minutes later, and after having adjusted the thermostat yet again, Kara buried herself under a mountain of fluffy blankets and warm comforters, and went to bed, falling asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. There was something to be said about mental and emotional exhaustion tied to a good night’s sleep.

* * *

On Thursday morning, Kara realised something was wrong. She woke up bathing in her own sweat. Her entire body stuck to her sheets, and everything in the room was blurry. Her stomach felt like it was moving towards her throat. She made a keening sound, before tilting her head to look towards her alarm.

The numbers were flashing red, but they were floating and blurry, so Kara couldn’t make them out. Her alarm could still alert her though, since it was buzzing hard enough to almost leap of off her nightstand.

Kara gritted her teeth and managed to lift her shaking arm to reach her alarm clock. She managed to steady the thing, and narrowed her eyes, focussing on getting the numbers to stop moving. After a few seconds of immense concentration, Kara finally managed to make them out.

It was 9:15.

“Shit!”

Kara jumped out of bed, ignoring the dizziness that fell over her and almost made her fall right to the floor. She trembled on her feet, but still ran unsteadily to her closet. She pulled open her drawer, but was met with mostly empty hangers. God damnit, she’d forgotten to iron her clothes the other night, because Alex had come by. It had been ages since this had happened. When Lena was around, she always reminded Kara not to leave her laundry in the washing machine downstairs, and to iron her them the night before work. But Lena wasn’t here, so, of course, Kara had forgotten.

Inwardly cursing herself, Kara pulled at the only presentable pieces of clothing she could find: a blue skirt, and a white blouse with some cute embroidery on it. She pulled her phone out of the charger in the wall – of course _now_ she noticed the dozens of messages James had sent her – and rushed over to her office, slipping on her shoes on the go.

When the elevator doors finally opened at about 9:55, Kara instantly knew this day would be much, _much_ worse than any of her other days working at CatCo. Because before she could even set foot in the office, she was met with an absolutely furious looking Lena Luthor, and a very apologetic looking James.

“My office,” Lena growled, “now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think, either in the comments or on tumblr! https://thingsanddreamsandstuff.tumblr.com


	4. Chapter 4

_“My office,” Lena growled, “now.”_

  
Kara felt her stomach drop, and felt the heat leave her body. She felt as if she had suddenly turned into stone, and was frozen on the spot. She saw Lena turn on her heel and walk to the office, and she knew she should follow, but she suddenly couldn’t move. Her entire body was willing her to stay where she was. Probably out of self-preservation.

She didn’t dare look around, but she could feel the entire office giving her sympathetic looks. From the corner of her eye, she could even see one guy pretending to hang himself with his tie. A popular joke, Kara assumed when she heard the muffled laughter.

“I’m sorry,” James mouthed. Kara tried to smile at him, but gave up almost immediately.

She swallowed hard. Lena had arrived at her office, and was holding the door open. She was about to meet her fate.

Without making a desperate quip with James like she used to do with Winn when Miss Grant was mad at her like that – _should have given her that second Xanax like you said!_ Or, _Guess my horoscope was right about this being a trying day for my emotional health!_ – Kara stayed silent, and walked towards Lena’s office. She kept her head down and ignored the stares she could feel burning holes in the back of her head. She’d gladly take any of Miss Grant’s outbursts over this any day.

“Close the door behind you.”

Lena had moved to sit behind her desk, riffling through some documents on her desk, while Kara wordlessly obeyed. Through the glass, she caught Nia’s pitiful look from across the bullpen. Kara decided she didn’t want her friend to see her get fired, so she closed her eyes and turned around. Kara’s breath almost caught in her chest when she realised this was the first time the two had been alone in a room together for weeks. If this had been any other occasion, Kara would have found reason to celebrate, but the joy was hard find in this situation.

But wow, Lena looked so beautiful! Kara always thought she was beautiful, of course, but now! She was wearing a dark blue suit that managed to simultaneously exude power and femininity, turning the heads of everyone she passed. It was such an effortlessly gorgeous look that Kara was sure she herself would never be able to pull off. And finished with that dark red signature lipstick she –

“Is this entire situation a joke to you?”

Lena’s hard words shattered Kara’s thoughts.

“W-what? N-no, Lena, I – ”

“It’s Miss Luthor to you,” Lena cut her off harshly.

Kara instantly shut her mouth. Lena closed her eyes and slowly breathed in and out.

“I have tried,” she said between gritted teeth, “not to let our personal situation interfere with work. To treat you like any other employee."

Kara’s heart broke hearing Lena say this. Of course she knew Lena treated her as such, but it was hurtful just the same.

“But,” Lena continued, snapping Kara out of her reveries, “you seem to insist on making your ‘superheroing,’” she uttered the word disdainfully, “interfere with your job. You _insist_ on irritating me, on grinding my gears, until you get what you want. You want a conversation with me, you’ve basically begged for it all week. You’ve been so desperate for it you’ve tried every trick in the book to get me to focus on you. Showing up late, interrupting meetings… It’s embarrassing,” she snapped.

Kara flinched, and tried to stay still.

“And it finally worked,” Lena sneered. “You’ve finally managed to get my attention.”

“No, Lena, that wasn’t – ”

“Being a horrible employee finally paid off,” Lena interrupted her, her voice as sharp as a blade. “Well now you have it. You have my undivided attention. I do hope you find it as satisfying as you’d hoped.”

Kara gulped.

“Let’s start at the start, shall we?” Lena said in her best business voice. “On my first day back at CatCo I find you with your boss, Mister Olsen, in a _very_ compromising situation, which is against a myriad of CatCo professional guidelines.”

“But that wasn’t – ”

“I wasn’t finished,” Lena said coldly, her eyes snapping up to meet Kara’s, whose voice instantly died down.

“I am kind enough to let your indiscretions pass, out of profession respect for Mister Olsen and yourself. I’d like to think I showed some leeway, an act of courtesy on my part which you have quite clearly just spat on.”

Kara flinched.

“Next, I ask you for one thing. To do. Your. Job.”

Her eyes bored into Kara’s, even as the latter looked away, cheeks flushing.

Kara readjusted her glasses, trying in vain to disappear from Lena’s office. A part of her actually debated jumping out of the window to fly somewhere safe, like an island a million miles away from this office. Then she remembered she didn’t have her powers right now, which is what had gotten her into this trouble in the first place.

 _Nuts_.

“You fail not only to be in attendance of the meetings from the start, but you also fail to listen to a word of what your superiors tell you.”

Kara wanted to protest, but the cold look in Lena’s eyes was enough to deter that idea.

“I ask you for one single interview, and instead of handling the rejection of your own narcissistic, self-aggrandizing piece on Supergirl like an adult, you choose to act like a petulant child and refuse to do the job you were assigned to do.”

Kara sprung back to life at those words.

“That’s not true!” she yelled far louder than she had intended to.

 _Shit_.

She hadn’t meant to yell, but Lena was being unfair! She was trying to get that interview! It wasn’t her fault that Miss Rojas was impossible to get a hold of.

And now she’d just been caught yelling at her boss by the entire office. Great. She knew people behind the glass doors of Lena’s office had heard her, and were staring right at her. They were probably already taking bets on how long it would take for Lena to have her escorted out of the building. Kara gulped.

Lena, for her part, didn’t look impressed.

“I- I mean,” Kara stuttered, back peddling, “I tried to get an interview with her! I’ve been trying all week! Miss Rojas is a hard woman to get in touch with. I couldn’t get her on the phone, and I’ve been in contact with all her assistants – which she has nine of, by the way, which is _insane_ – and then I was redirected to some department heads, but they couldn’t give me an answer either, so I – ”

“Pardon my _ignorance_ ,” Lena said sarcastically, effectively cutting off Kara’s rambling, “but why should I care?”

Kara’s mouth opened and closed in her best impression of a fish on dry land. She’d completely lost her momentum.

“W-what?” Kara asked. She didn’t understand.

“I _mean_ ,” Lena continued, some Schadenfreude in her words, “isn’t that your job? Isn’t that what I’m paying you for? To get one measly little interview? Or is that above your pay grade?”

She arched an eyebrow to perfection.

“If you can’t even score one interview all week, why should I keep you around as a reporter? You failed at the one thing you had to do; report.”

Lena leaned back in her chair, crossed her legs and folded her arms across her chest. A position of power.

“Tell me, Kara,” she continued, “are you telling me you need a career change because you’re not fit as a reporter, or are you telling me you prefer your superhero job over this one? Because in either case, it seems we’ll need to discuss exit payments.”

Kara didn’t have a retort. But she was so tired, and her head hurt so much, that she could feel her lower lip start to tremble.

She would not cry.

She would _not_ cry.

“And let’s not forget,” Lena said, “that on top of failing to do your job, you actually preferred to do your superhero job over showing up to CatCo on time.”

Kara remembered just in time that J’onn had taken over her superhero duties at the moment.

“Maybe Mister Olsen let you get away with that before, but that will not fly here anymore, Miss Danvers, do you understand?”

Kara nodded hesitantly.

Lena stopped speaking and leaned back. For the first time since that had started this conversation – or confrontation – Lena truly looked at Kara. Looked at her fidgeting with her glasses, to the blouse sticking to Kara’s torso from all the running she had done to get to CatCo – damn those busses and their refusal to be on time – and to her trembling lips.

“Miss Danvers,” she said calmly, “I don’t think you truly understand what I have just said.”

Kara looked at her questioningly. What hadn’t she understood?

“If you are ever late to work again, or if you ever fail to do your job and deliver on something your boss told you to do because of,” Lena pursed her lips and gestured vaguely, “anything, _especially_ if it involves a superhero activity, you can pick up your stuff and leave.”

Kara’s mouth fell open, and she was at a complete loss for words. Lena noticed her inability to speak, and a cold smirk graced her features for a brief moment. And in that moment, only just for a split second, Lena looked exactly like how the media had always portrayed her as. Cold, evil, gleeful and powerful. The exact female counterpart of her brother. And Kara couldn’t breathe.

Lena’s face smoothed over, and she stood up, picking through some of the paperwork on her desk.

“A more direct translation, Miss Danvers, is that if you fail to get my that interview by the end of this week for whatever flimsy excuse you manage to produce, you will be fired. Am I clear?”

The words were ringing in Kara’s ears.

Kara thought she was sinking through the floor. Lena had basically told her her career at CatCo was finished. She would never be able to get an interview with Andrea Rojas. Ever. And certainly not by the end of that week, that was the next day! This had basically been her termination meeting. She was only just starting to find herself in her articles, and now she was done. Over. Fired.

The thought of having to leave CatCo filled Kara with so much dread that she couldn’t keep the tears from rushing to her eyes.

_What will Miss Grant think of her?_

Surviving all those years as her assistant but not even lasting that long as a reporter? Kara would have to call her to tell her, and Miss Grant would be so disappointed with her. She would say Kara had failed to live up to CatCo’s image, and that she was an embarrassment and a failure, and that Miss Grant shouldn’t have wasted all those years on mentoring her, because it had all been for nothing anyway.

Lena’s eyes lifted up to Kara’s, who struggled to control her tears, still waiting on an answer.

“Well?” she asked. “Am I being clear?”

“Very,” Kara croaked.

Her heart was throbbing in her throat, she felt like she was suffocating in that office. It felt like the walls were keeping her there, trying to close in on her, and trapping her there forever. _She had to get away from there._

“May I be excused, ma’am?” Kara asked desperately.

She couldn’t stand to stay in this room longer than necessary.

“Just so I can get back to the interview, like you asked?” Her voice was scratchy and painful, and Kara struggled to keep breathing normally.

Lena looked at her for two more agonising seconds before she replied, “You may,” and looked away from Kara.

Kara turned on her heels, and ran out of that nightmarish office.

She had never run from anywhere as fast as she did right then and there.

* * *

Kara ignored Nia’s calls, and went straight to her desk after the complete annihilation she suffered in Lena’s office. She didn’t want anybody’s sympathy; she just wanted to get that freaking interview over with. She ignored the many stares, the jokes and even James, who tried to apologise to her for Rao knows what.

Kara was set on ignoring everybody and everything in that office until she had the stupid interview lying on her desk. She forced herself not to think about what had just happened, the way Lena had almost gloated at Kara’s discomfort and pain, but with every step she took, every click of her heel on the floor, Lena’s cruel words resounded in her head.

Click, fired.

Click, fired.

Click, fired.

The words and the steps started dictating the rhythm of throbbing that had been hurting her head for days now, and Kara felt herself get more frustrated about everything. It was just so unfair.

She hadn’t wanted for Lena to find out like that. She hadn’t wanted to get Lena, and she most certainly hadn’t wanted to lose her best friend in the process.

But who she was getting most angry with, was Andrea freaking Rojas. That damned woman could cost her her job, just because she thought she was above interviews and couldn’t even be bothered to say so over the phone. No, Kara was freaking pissed at her. Who did she think she was? She thought she could just casually destroy Kara’s life, and pretend it was all okay?

No.

Kara had suffered today, she had taken hit after hit with Lena, and she had taken them in stride. But days of pent up frustration and a headache that was killing her, had made Kara angrier than she had been in months. She would get a conversation with that woman. Whether it was with a notepad in her hand, or being carried out by security, Kara would force that woman to at least look at her, and make her justify her horrendous behaviour.

Sliding in her chair, she pulled up the phone number of Miss Rojas’s number one assistant, Jean Grayson, and called it.

It rang for precisely six seconds before Miss Grayson answered.

“Jean Grayson, personal assistant to Miss Andrea Rojas in Rojas Fashion Industries, how can I help you?”

“Jean? Hi, Kara here, remember me?” Kara said faux cheerily.

“Miss Danvers?” Jean stuttered. “Y-you’re calling me again? I thought I referred you t – ”

“Yes,” Kara said, spinning in her chair. “I was, you did. But see, I’m not really getting anywhere with all these phone calls to all these different departments, so I’ve changed my approach.”

“Y-you have?” Miss Grayson sounded so unsure of the situation that Kara almost sympathised with her. Almost.

“Yes. I’ve decided that information can be misconstrued over phone calls, so I’ve come to the conclusion that it would be better to meet in person and have a constructive conversation about whether or not Miss Rojas’s interested in doing an interview with CatCo Magazine. Would today work for you?”

“Today?” Miss Grayson’s voice sounded like a panicked shriek at this point. “You want to meet today?”

“Yes, exactly, when would be a good time?”

“Never! I mean – or, I mean, not today! Miss Rojas’s not in!”

That usually would’ve discouraged Kara altogether, but Kara knew better and smirked. She couldn’t even remember the amount of times she’d claimed Miss Grant was on a businesstrip, or on an airplane with no reception just to get the woman out of annoying dinners with creepy board people. Kara would bet her apartment on Miss Rojas still being in National City.

“That’s okay,” Kara lied. “I only want to meet up with you.”

“Me?” The poor girl seemed to be on the verge of crying, but Kara willed herself not to feel sorry for her. She couldn’t get fired over this.

“Yes, just so we can establish a narrative that works for everybody to see whether or not an interview is or isn’t possible.” Kara remained as calm as she possibly could. It felt good. She could feel her tears dry on her skin, and she knew she was starting to get her life back. Nothing would stop her from getting that interview. Not James, not Jean Grayson, and not even Miss Andrea Rojas herself.

“I, erm, I – I need a moment to sort through my calendar.”

Kara smiled.

“Of course, take your time, I’ll wait.”

She knew Miss Grayson was expecting her to hang up the phone, but she wasn’t going to do that. If she lost the connection now, she would never be able to get in touch with that assistant ever again, and she could wave even the possibility of an interview with her boss goodbye. Kara could almost hear the woman grind her teeth through the phone.

“Sure,” Miss Grayson said flatly, “if you don’t mind the wait.”

“Of course not,” Kara said cheerily. Nothing would deter her. Absolutely nothing.

The woman on the other end of the line sighed.

“Well,” she said finally, after some hesitation, “I guess you could come around at five. Does that work for you, Miss Danvers?”

The sarcasm dripped from her words, but Kara wasn’t discouraged in the slightest. On the contrary, a big grin spread across her face, confusing Nia, who had been casually trying to observe Kara just in case the other woman would start crying again.

She probably looked like a psychopathic madwoman.

“That works for me!” Kara said. “See you then!”

Kara ended the phone call, and pumped her fist in the air. She was one step closer to getting that interview.

* * *

Kara spent the afternoon in her office, working on her list of questions for Andrea Rojas. She worked through lunch, shooting down Nia and James’ request to go to Noonan’s with them. She typed away on her laptop feverishly, only stopping from time to time to check the clock.

The temperature in the office was really playing tricks on her. Kara had been regularly wiping her brow with the back of her hand to get rid of the excess of sweat forming there. Her headache had lessened slightly – who knew painkillers were so effective?! – but her queasiness hadn’t gone down. All day she’d felt weak and tired, so much so that she swore to herself she would go to the D.E.O. and rest under a yellow sunlamp the first chance she got. Kara hadn’t felt strong enough to stand for longer than twenty minutes before the room started spinning slightly, so she just stayed seated at her desk.

At four, James knocked on her door.

“Hey, you got a minute?”

Kara smiled tiredly and nodded for him to come in.

“Only if it’s really a minute,” she said with a smile.

James smiled back at her and took a seat opposite of her, interlacing his fingers on her desk. He looked at her with his ‘how are you really doing’ eyes, and Kara frowned. He was going to try and talk to her again. She sighed internally. She really, really didn’t have time for this right now.

He looked at her with his most concerned puppy expression that Kara used to melt for, but right now, she really, really just wanted to send him on his way. The second he opened his mouth; Kara knew exactly what was coming.

“How are you holding up?” James asked carefully.

There it was.

Kara gave her best ‘puppy Danvers smile,’ and said: “I’m alright James. Really, it’s fine.”

James frowned. “Are you sure? Because this morning – ”

“Really. I’m fine, James,” Kara cut him off.

She hated being rude, but she really couldn’t afford to be distracted right now. She needed that interview to save her job, so painful reminders of Lena’s behaviour towards her this morning wouldn’t get her anywhere.

“Lena was mad at me, my _boss_ was mad at me. It happens.”

She shrugged.

“I’ll survive. It’s not like Miss Grant never yelled at me, right? It’s no biggie.”

That was a lie and they both knew it. Kara was deeply hurt by every painful sentence uttered by her beautiful former best friend.

Now it was James’ turn to frown. His eyes studied her face for a second before he said: “Are you sure you’re feeling okay, you look kind of…” he hesitated, trying to find a nice word to describe her with, “tired?”

Kara threw him an exasperated look.

“Truly, James, thank you. I really needed that. A true boost to my self-esteem, right there.”

James didn’t respond to her lame joke, in fact, his brow furrowed.

“Hey, have you gotten your powers back yet? It’s been four days now, right?”

Kara sighed and shook her head.

“No they haven’t, but it’s totally normal, I just haven’t found the time to go to the D.E.O. yet. No sunlamps for me,” she quipped.

James frown deepened. Right when Kara was on the brink of giving up on trying to convince James she was fine and just ask him to leave, he suddenly moved closer, and before Kara could move away, brought his hand up to her forehead.

“Jesus, Kara!” he exclaimed. “You’re burning up!”

Kara pulled her body away from him.

“James!” she hissed, “after what happened on Monday, I really don’t think you should touch me like that! Lena already gave me a hard time about it!”

But James ignored her.

“Kara, you have a fever,” he said seriously. "You need to go home and let Alex check on you. This isn’t good!”

Kara waved his worries away and looked at the clock. “I’ll be fine, James. Can you just excuse me; I need to get to Rojas Fashion Industries.”

Kara stood up, and almost immediately, she was hit with a dizzy spell, and grasped her desk with one hand to steady herself. The blood came rushing to her head, and she could feel her headache start to return with its familiar throbbing.

“Kara!” James stood up too when he saw Kara swaying on her feet.

“M’fine, I’m fine,” Kara said, closing her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose. “I’m fine, I just really need to leave right now.”

James grabbed her arm to steady her.

“Kara, you’re sick, you need to see Alex,” he urged her.

“James, really, I’m fine. Please just – ”

Just then, Kara opened her eyes to see Lena pass through the CatCo bullpen. She was handed some documents by some assistant, and thanked her. Kara was frozen on the spot, the words directed towards James dying out on her tongue.

As if on she could physically feel Kara’s eyes on her, Lena’s head snapped up, and their eyes met. The dark haired woman regarded her for some time, the look in her eyes so intense that Kara felt the familiar feeling of paralysis crash over her. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t speak – heck – she couldn’t even listen to James anymore. All she could focus on was Lena. A frown passed over Lena’s face. Her eyebrows scrunched together, and her lips pressed together in a tight line.

Kara suddenly became hyperaware of James hand on her arm, and her eyes widened. She could only imagine what Lena was seeing right now. She quickly diverted her eyes and shook off James’s hand.

He protested, but Kara didn’t listen. Her cheeks were flushing in embarrassment. This was the second time this week Lena could have misconstrued her actions with James! As if the both of them lying to her about Kara being Supergirl wasn’t bad enough, now Lena probably thought the two of them were dating behind her back too.

Kara wanted to explain. She wanted to go to Lena and tell her this was all just a matter of seeing the wrong stuff, and misinterpreting different signals, but she knew it wouldn’t make a damn difference, and that’s what frustrated her the most.

“Kara,” James pleaded again, but Kara ignored him.

She grabbed her leather bag from where she left it next to her desk, and gathered interview notes. From her window, she could see dark clouds gathering outside, and she really wanted to make it to Rojas’s Fashion Industries before the storm broke out.

“Kara, at least call Alex to say you aren’t feeling well! You know she’ll be upset you aren’t telling her this,” he argued.

“I’m kind of tired of people being mad at me for things I did or didn’t tell them, James!” Kara snapped. “I need to get to this interview, I’ll check in with Alex later, okay? Now, please, back off!”

Without waiting for his reply, Kara turned on her heel and stormed out of the office. Lena’s lingering look wasn’t lost on her.

* * *

Of course the storm broke the second Kara was outside of CatCo. Rain came pouring down in the span of seconds, and the crowds around her suddenly changed into a sea of different coloured umbrella patterns. Of course today of all days, Kara hadn’t brought her jacket with her. She was barely three feet away from CatCo before she was completely and utterly soaked.

Her glasses instantly fogged over, and were absolutely useless now. But of course, she couldn’t just take them off. After all, it only took one overly observant bystander to see right through the persona she’d tried so hard to create. No, Kara had to keep them on.

Which brought her right to her second problem; she couldn’t see further than five feet in any direction, which made spotting a cab completely impossible. Kara swung her head from left to right, but the rain paired with the insufferable grey mass of people pushing past her prevented her from seeing anything.

Kara huffed and made her way to the car side of the sidewalk. She held a hand over her glasses and squinted, trying to get a better look of the world around her. Cars raced passed, rushing to get home. Kara cursed herself. Of course she had to leave at rush hour. All of a sudden a flash of yellow appeared in the corner of her eye. A cab.

“Hey, hey!” Kara called out. She started swinging her arm above her head like a crazy person. “Over here!”

The yellow car cruised closer, and Kara inwardly thanked Rao she wouldn’t have to spend another minute in the pouring rain. Kara kept her arm outstretched as the car came her way. However, when she set one foot closer to the road, the yellow car didn’t slow down. In fact, the cab accelerated. Kara only caught a glimpse of two passengers huddled comfortably in the back before the car drove through a giant puddle on the road. The water rose up and splattered on all sides, effectively soaking her from head to toe.

Kara gasped as she felt the cold seep through her white blouse, penetrating her chest all the way down to her lungs. It felt like icicles were making its way into her bones, freezing her from the inside out. For someone who’d spent the last fifteen years being completely unaffected by any changes in weather, this cold was so unfamiliar, so all-consuming that Kara felt her entire body scream out.

Meanwhile the cab raced forward, ignoring the drenched woman on the sidewalk completely.

“Hey!” Kara yelled. But her voice was drowned out by the rain, and the cab driver didn’t care enough to stop. Maybe he hadn’t even noticed her in the first place.

Kara looked around, and she saw some people hurriedly passing by, clinging tightly to their umbrellas. She got the occasional sympathetic look; but nobody stopped to offer her some cover from the rain. Nobody stopped to check on her. The crowds just moved passed her, leaving her shivering.

She wiggled her wrist until the water droplets had somewhat disappeared from her watch and looked at the time.

4:39.

Kara cursed herself.

Even if she could still manage to flag a cab – and in this weather, she highly doubted that – the traffic jam would make it impossible for her to arrive at Rojas Industries by five. Her best bet would be to start running, and to not stop until she got there.

So that’s what she did.

Kara took a deep breath before clasping her bag tightly to her chest, and taking off through the crowds.

“Sorry,”

“My bad,”

“Coming through,”

“Apologies,”

“Sorry!”

“In a hurry!”

Kara was convinced she’d never put in such a tremens effort to get somewhere on time. Not even when she and Alex had accidentally slept in and had had to run to get to school on time, because one more strike for being to late would get Alex a permanent strike on her record – she’d already gotten in too much trouble to earn herself a pass.

Sweat mixed with rain mingled on Kara’s skin, and she felt her lungs scream in protest. Her breaths came out raspy and short, and at that point, Kara was convinced she was purely running on adrenaline to keep going. It would make for a nice article, she thought briefly, what kind of things people were capable of doing when they were drugged up on adrenaline.

The pavement was overflowing with water, and became nothing but a grey blur to Kara, who didn’t slow down, not even to check what the time was.

With every step she took, Kara’s leather clad feet seemed to land in some kind of puddle. The cold drenched through her socks and into her feet, but she couldn’t find the time to feel uncomfortable. She ran until all the buildings and all the people around her became nothing more than a grey blur.

The only good thing about that situation, Kara supposed, was that the cold she’d experienced earlier had been replaced by an uncomfortable heat that burned in the back of her neck.

Kara ran like her life depended on it. Though, technically, her job and livelihood depended on it, so she supposed it was a sort of life or death situation.

All the muscles in her body protested, and not for the first time in her life, Kara wondered why people would ever voluntarily do this for sport. Her knees were shaking so bad, she was scared they were going to give out.

The pounding in her head matched the pace of her feet touching and leaving the stones beneath her, but she tried with all her might not to focus on the pain.

She just had to keep running.

Just keep running.

Finally, freaking _finally_ , the bright letters of Rojas Fashion Industries announced her arrival. The dark grey clouds had obscured much of National City, but the letters seemed too proud to be affected by any of the darkness. They shone fiercely, lighting Kara’s way to what she could only assume to be a step in the right direction to win back her friendship with Lena.

Kara almost laughed in relief. She’d never been so glad to see a skyscraper. She had to quench down the overwhelming urge to pat the building in thanks.

Happier than she’d been all week, Kara looked left and right before crossing the street, making her way towards the fashion empire. It was a gigantic glass skyscraper where lights shone on every floor. The building was higher than any of the offices next to it, as if it was subtly trying to make clear just what business ruled the city. The building could probably rival both CatCo and L-Corp in height.

Once Kara arrived in front of the building, she pushed open one of the giant glass doors hiding the interior. She slid inside and closed the door behind her. She leaned heavily against the it, allowing herself to relax for just one minute. She looked at the watch around her trembling wrist.

4:56.

She’d made it on time.

She looked around and saw that the inside of the building was even more impressive than the outside. The ceiling was extremely high, painted a deep gold colour, which in turn shone a golden light on the entire ground floor. A giant crystal chandelier was suspended from it, and gave the lounge an extremely fancy look. The room was further decorated with some expensive cream coloured leather seats and couches surrounding glass tables. Some exotic potted plants were placed all across the open hall, so flashes of brightly coloured flowers contrasted with the glass walls and jet-black stone floor.

Kara looked on amazed, as gorgeous people in fancy suits, dresses and pantsuits hurriedly made their way through the lounge and in and out of elevators. It was like CatCo under Cat Grant’s reign times a thousand!

Just when she was ready to pull herself together and make her way towards the receptionist’s counter, she was kept back by a strong hand on her bicep.

“Excuse me ma’am,”

Kara looked up and saw that the hand on her arm belonged to a bear of a man dressed in a black suit sporting a scary serious expression on his face.

“You can’t shelter from the rain here, this is a professional building. I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

“Oh,” Kara said quickly, trying to smile as sweetly as possible, “I’m not hear to seek cover, I’m here for an interview!”

The man in the suit didn’t budge. He looked her up and down, and his hold tightened.

Kara could only imagine she didn’t much look like a reporter now, but seriously? Who treats people like this? Even Lena’s security personnel were friendlier than this one, and they had to deal with a constant barrage of very _real_ death threats to their boss.

“Nice try,” the man in the suit grumbled. “Rojas Fashion Industries doesn’t allow reporters on the premises. I suggest you move along, Miss.”

“No,” Kara protested, “I have a meeting here! You can’t just deny me entrance!”

“I can and I will,” the man said, seemingly growing in stature. His voice became graver, and his expression scarier.

Kara tried not to be too intimidated, but she couldn’t help but feel a little trapped. Not for the first time this week Kara wished she had her powers again so she could teach this shmuck a lesson about harassing women.

“Ma’am if you don’t leave, I will remove you from the building myself.”

Okay so moaning about her lack of powers wasn’t going to cut it now. She needed to find another way.

“Please,” Kara pleaded, “I have a meeting with one of Miss Rojas’ assistants! You have to believe me! Can’t you just call her and let her know I’m here? I need to get in contact with her, my job depends on it.”

She didn’t know what did it, batting her eyelashes at the security guard, her pathetic soaking wet demeanour, or the pleas in her voice, but the man seemed to hesitate. He looked down at her, a pretty blonde with big, desperate blue eyes and a brown bag pulled close to her chest and he relented.

She probably didn’t much look like a threat anyway.

“Fine,” he grumbled, dropping her arm, and Kara’s heart soared in relief. “Who did you have a meeting with?”

He tapped on his earpiece, ready to make the call upstairs.

“Jean Grayson,” Kara said confidently, “Miss Rojas’ personal assistant?”

Suddenly, his face tightened.

“I’m sorry, did you say Miss Grayson?”

Kara frowned.

“Um, yes?” she asked hesitantly.

He nodded to himself.

“I’m sorry, but that’s not possible.”

Kara blanked. “I’m sorry, what?”

He sighed. “Miss Grayson left the building thirty minutes ago. I saw her leave myself.”

“W-what?” Kara’s stomach sank. “N-no, that’s not – we had a meeting planned. She promised me – I mean I called,”

The man nodded emphatically. “I’m sure ma’am.”

“No really, I did! I do! She said so herself.”

The security guard nodded once more, but Kara could see he was already taking hold of the iron doorknob to open the door. He was going to send her away. He wasn’t listening to her!

No. No. This couldn’t be happening. She couldn’t have come all this way, running through the rain just to be let down again. She couldn’t lose her job just because some stupid overpaid assistant couldn’t be bothered to keep to her schedule.

If she couldn’t do it the right way, she would find another way. It was now or never.

When the security guard was distracted with opening the door, Kara took her shot.

She ducked under his outstretched arm and dashed towards the receptionist’s desk at the end of the hall.

“Hey,” the security guard called after her, but Kara ignored him. Her job was depending on this interview, she couldn’t feel guilty about running away from one security guard. She ran off before he had a chance to grab her by her bag.

She pushed open some more glass doors, and let them close behind her without stopping. She stormed the desk, where the receptionist quickly dropped her phone. She stood up, looking alarmed, and regarded Kara wearily.

“Listen,” Kara cut to the chase, “I had a meeting with Miss Grayson about an interview I wanted to set up. Now,” she looked over her shoulder and saw that security guard number one had called some more security guards, who were currently making their way over to her. She turned back around. The brown-eyed secretary seemed to be debating trying to make a break for it.

“Look, I don’t have much time, but I need that interview, okay? If I don’t get it, I get fired! So could you, please, _please_ , get someone on the line who could help me?” Kara’s voice was bordering on hysterical.

“I-I’m sorry, Miss,” the woman stammered. “I sympathise, truly, but – ”

Kara closed her eyes, tuning the other woman out. The security guards were nearing her, and Kara honestly wanted to cry.

It was hopeless. They were going to drag her out and she was never going to get that interview. She would go in to CatCo tomorrow and she would have to go into her first meeting of the day to tell Lena that she’d come empty-handed. She would be told to pack her stuff, and oh Rao –

“Look, please, you don’t understand, I’m not some crazy person, okay? I work with CatCo magazine, and I really need this interview, I – ”

“Ma’am, you need to come with us.”

Two security guards gripped her upper arms tightly, and Kara let out a painful shout.

“Let me go!” she yelled, struggling to get out of the strong hold.

“Ma’am, we’ve notified the police, and if you don’t get out right now, you’ll be arrested on the spot.”

“It’s not fair,” Kara cried. “I had a meeting!”

She was aware she was starting to sound slightly insane at that point, but Rao, this was so _mean_! Kara always tried to never hate anyone, but in this moment she hated Jean Grayson, she hated James and she hated Andrea Rojas with a passion.

The receptionist watched with a shocked expression as the security guards forcibly dragged Kara to the exit. She barely even had to walk; her feet almost slid over the floor as if she were dragged along like a puppet.

Kara could feel the fight leave her body as she saw people watching her be dragged away, their expressions ranging from sympathetic to downright condescending. They murmured quietly among themselves, and Kara felt the familiar pang of hurt knowing that these people were all talking about _her_.

Judging _her_.

But what the hell did it matter anyway? She was never going to get that interview in the first place. So she would be fired. Whatever. It didn’t matter anymore. If she was lucky, Kara mused, she might get placed in Maggie’s precinct, then she might be let off with just a warning. It didn’t matter anyway.

Kara hung her head and let the men drag her out. It wasn’t worth the struggle anyway.

“What the hell is happening here?”

Kara’s head snapped up when she heard the sharp, low voice of a woman ring through the glass halls.

The hold on her arms loosened. Kara peeked behind one of the bulky security men and her eyes widened.

The woman walking towards them was gorgeous. No, that was an understatement. She was almost Lena-gorgeous, which was Kara’s most extreme way of noting that this woman was beautiful beyond all rational thought.

The woman wore a rose gold three-piece suit, with some intricate light blue flowery patterns sewn onto it. She wore a white blouse with a plunging neckline that could even rival those of some of Lena’s more interesting cocktail dresses underneath it. The suit looked so daring and sophisticated, yet at the same time, soft to the touch. The outfit was paired with some pearly killer heels that probably cost more than Kara’s entire wardrobe put together. A group of women flocked behind her, carrying what Kara assumed were the other woman’s phone and purse. She was reminded of herself back when she was Miss Grant’s assistant.

Speaking of Miss Grant, the woman looked irritated. But even through the darkened expression on her face, Kara was mesmerised to see a pair of piercing blue eyes glare at the men surrounding her. She wore lipstick that was just a shade or two darker than the red one Lena always wore. Her brown hair was slid back tightly, so it moved perfectly with every move the woman made. It was cut in a razor sharp line, and fell a little lower than her shoulders. She was older than Kara, maybe thirty-five, if she had to guess. She looked powerful and mature in an effortless sort of way.

Without having been told, Kara just instantly knew that this was Andrea Rojas.

The elusive, impossible-to-get-an-interview-with Andrea Rojas.

A very pissed-off looking Miss Rojas.

Kara swallowed hard. Maybe she hadn’t thought this all the way through.

“Our apologies Miss Rojas,” security guard number one said, “we had some problems with a reporter who forcibly made her way inside the building.”

Forcibly? Really? Kara inwardly huffed. She’d just run across a hall.

 _Forcibly_. Honestly.

“We’ve contacted the police to have her arrested for trespassing. We’re sorry to have interrupted your afternoon.”

Andrea Rojas’ eyes fell to Kara, who felt herself freeze on the spot.

Wow, those eyes were blue. Like, blue with a swirl of green in them. Like an ocean. Absolutely captivating. Up close, this woman was even more beautiful than before.

Kara had to shake her head to clear her brain of those intruding thoughts. Sure she’d thought women were beautiful before – like, hello, she’d worked for Cat Grant for years, and her best friends all looked like supermodels, not to mention her own sister who could probably run for hottest D.E.O. agent if she wanted to – but she’d only ever been this speechless when she met Lena for the first time.

Miss Rojas’ eyes studied Kara from head to toe, narrowing in the process, taking in her entire wet-cat look.

Oh this definitely wasn’t Kara’s best day.

The woman hummed.

“It may just be a very long time since I’ve actually talked to a reporter,” she said, “but I seem to remember that they aren’t usually dressed like they just took a plunge in a pool right before coming down to an interview.”

Kara didn’t know if the woman was being serious, or if she was just joking.

In any case, it couldn’t hurt to explain herself.

“It was raining,” she mumbled.

Miss Rojas smirked.

“Yes, I deduced that,” she stated. “Now,” she said, motioning with her chin for the guards to let Kara go completely, “tell me exactly who you are and what exactly you thought to accomplish by coming here.”

The men instantly let her go. Kara fell back on the heels of her feet, and shook a bit on her legs trying to deal with gravity again. The security people had been carrying more of her weight than she’d actually thought.

Kara rubbed her sore biceps. Those guys really did a number on her. She’d remember that for when she had her powers back. That way she could avoid seriously hurting the minor criminals that plagued National City.

“My name is Kara Danvers,” Kara said, trying to sound more confident than she actually felt. Recognition flashed in those blue eyes.

“You’re the reporter who’s been bothering my staff all week,” she said, sounding more delighted than Kara would expect.

“W-wait, you know about me?” Kara asked confusedly. “You know I’ve been trying to get an interview?”

Miss Rojas laughed, but it didn’t seem mean-spirited. She seemed genuinely amused by Kara’s antics.

“Of course I do!” She took a step closer to Kara, who immediately felt intoxicated by the other woman’s alluring smell. Sweet, yet more mature than any of the perfumes Kara herself had collected over the years. She could sense notes of vanilla, jasmine and… may rose?

“I know everything that goes on in here. It is, after all, my company,” she said with a slight raise of her eyebrow.

Oh dear Rao.

Kara wished she could only be half as confident as this woman sounded. Her voice just oozed power and mischief all at once.

_And Kara liked it._

Oh Rao, she didn’t just think that. This was no time to fawn over some powerful lady in a killer suit.

“I’ve read your articles, by the way,” the woman said casually. “I like the way you write, very impressive, truly.”

Kara was a bit dazed, either by the shocking turn of events or this woman’s voice, she did not know.

“Um, thank you?” she said, but it came out sounding more like a question.

“You’re very welcome,” Miss Rojas said, signing a document that had been shoved in her hands. She handed it back, and refocused all of her attention on Kara.

Rao those eyes were distracting.

No, bad Kara! What was it with her and confident CEO’s, truly? It was like she had some intense need to be liked by every single one of them! It was horrifying.

Kara quickly tried to turn back to the matter at hand.

“If you knew I was trying to get in contact with you, why didn’t you just let your employees tell me you didn’t want to do an interview?” Kara asked confused.

Miss Rojas laughed, and of _course_ it just had to sound sexy.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Miss Rojas apologised, trying to regain her composure. “I really shouldn’t laugh, it’s actually rather serious, you have no idea how cute you just sounded.”

Kara frowned.

“Really,” the woman assured her, putting a soft hand on Kara’s soaked arm without indicating she was bothered by the water in the least. It made Kara blush. “It’s nothing personal. It’s just,” Miss Rojas hesitated. “I’m a private person, Kara – can I call you Kara?”

Kara nodded sheepishly, her mouth had fallen slightly open in awe. She was supposed to be angry at this woman for putting her career at risk – she had been angry not more than ten minutes ago – but Kara found she couldn’t. This woman with her high cheekbones, full lips and captivating eyes spoke so warmly that Kara had almost forgotten why she’d come here in the first place.

So if Andrea Rojas wanted to call her Kara, Kara would absolutely, one hundred per cent let her.

Miss Rojas smiled heartily, exposing a row of perfect straight, white teeth.

“Fantastic,” she said grinning broadly. Then she turned to the security men still waiting stiffly behind Kara, and her voice grew colder. “You can leave now, Mr Ericson, and your team too.”

“But what about – ”

“And,” Miss Rojas said, cutting him off, “you will call the police back and tell them that there will be no need for them to come and collect Kara here. You’ll tell them you made a mistake and that Rojas Fashion Industries requires no further actions to be taken against her. Is that clear?”

The security man – Mr Ericson – threw Kara a nasty look, but he nodded nonetheless.

“Yes, ma’am. Our apologies, ma’am.”

Only when the security men had backed away from the women and had made their way over to the entrance of the building did Miss Rojas turn back to Kara.

Her expression went from mildly irritated to delighted in seconds and honest to Rao, it did things to Kara. This woman looked at her as if she were the most interesting person in the universe, like every word she said mattered.

She made her feel special, and they hadn’t even exchanged more than ten sentences.

“I – um, thank you,” Kara blushed.

“It’s no problem at all, dear,” Miss Rojas said sweetly. “I do apologise for the way you’ve been treated. My,”

She trailed a hand over Kara’s wet sleeve from her shoulder to her hand, and Kara was sure that if she hadn’t already broken out in goose bumps from the cold, she definitely would have now.

“How they could ever have regarded you as a threat is beyond me.”

She looked at Kara with a concerned expression on her face.

“You must be cold, aren’t you cold?”

Kara flushed. “Oh, no, it’s fine, really.”

Even though she was actually, pretty damn cold. The heating within the building had helped some, but Kara still had her arms wrapped around her torso to conserve whatever body heat she still had left. She thought her teeth might start to chatter if she didn’t.

Miss Rojas seemed to look right through her act.

“No,” she decided, “this won’t do. How can we possibly have a normal conversation with you shivering like that.”

Kara looked down at her feet. She blushed, but this time, it was from embarrassment. It was just like her to behave so weirdly around other people that they felt uncomfortable.

Miss Rojas snapped her fingers, and someone, Kara couldn’t see who, handed her an expensive woollen coat. Miss Rojas took it with a curt nod, and then, to Kara’s immense surprise, draped it around Kara’s shoulders.

Kara looked up with big eyes, while Miss Rojas carefully adjusted the coat around Kara. The coat smelled so good. Like summer, and winter, and spice and deliciousness and _Rao_ , Kara enjoyed it.

Kara blushed again, and by now, she imagined her head must start to look ridiculous. First off, she was soaking wet, her hair hung in damp strands around her face, her glasses were fogged over, and her cheeks must be tomato red by now from blushing so much.

“T-thank you,” she managed to say, taking hold of the incredibly soft fabric and covering her arms with it some more. “You really didn’t have to.”

Miss Rojas waved her concerns away, and smiled.

“Nonsense, you looked uncomfortable. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable around me.”

She said those things as if they were the most natural things in the world, and Kara couldn’t help but smile too. This woman was so incredibly nice. So unlike the picture Kara had painted of her in her head. She felt guilty for ever cursing the woman in her mind for not giving her an interview. After meeting her, she was convinced the woman must have an incredibly good excuse for not doing interviews. After all, why would anyone of her kind nature ever intend on hurting the career of a reporter? It was all probably a big misunderstanding, Kara was sure of it.

Miss Rojas suddenly frowned, and Kara immediately wanted to see the woman smile again, by whatever means necessary.

“Now where was I?”

“Y-you’re a private person?”

Kara hated that she stuttered. She was an experienced reporter for Rao’s sake! Now she was sounding more and more like the baby reporter slash assistant she used to be when she met Lena. So embarrassing.

Miss Rojas snapped her fingers.

“Right!”

She grinned again.

“Let’s go sit down somewhere,” she said, linking her arm with Kara’s and guiding her over to one of the leather seats at one end of the hall.

“See, Kara,” Miss Rojas said once they sat down, Kara becoming increasingly more uncomfortable when she felt the leather dampen under her soaked clothes – “I am a private person, which means I like to be able to control what is being said about me in the media.”

Kara nodded. That made sense.

“I have a lot of friends in high places, you know, and I have seen first-hand what happens to them when they choose to give an interview, or – even worse – when they deny interviewers the chance to pry into their lives. No offense,” she added quickly.

“None taken,” Kara said, “but,” she frowned, “what do you mean it’s worse to deny interviews? They don’t give out any information about their lives, so why would that somehow be worse?”

Miss Rojas smiled conspiratorially. “Well that’s their little trick, isn’t it? It’s one thing to take the answers you’re given and write up a story, but it’s another to use your imagination to fill the gaps in information.”

Kara was still confused. Miss Rojas smiled. She looked at one of the girls who was standing around, tapping away on an iPad dealing with whatever problem Rojas Fashion Industries concerned itself with. Miss Rojas snapped her fingers, and a brunette who reminded Kara eerily of Siobhan quickly made her way over to the duo.

“Yes, Miss Rojas?”

“Could you get a towel for my friend Kara here, please, Jane?” She then turned to Kara. “Not that it bothers me, honey, but you’re still looking kind of soaked.”

Kara looked down and saw that she was indeed still dripping water on the gorgeous obsidian floor below her feet. She looked up sheepishly at the woman next to her.

“Sorry,” she mumbled.

Miss Rojas waved her concerns away. “Don’t be, Kara, I just thought you didn’t look too comfortable.”

“So what you’re saying is,” Kara returned to the conversation, “is that reporters make things up about people they can’t get interviews with?” Kara frowned again. “That doesn’t sound fair.”

Miss Rojas threw her head back and laughed. Kara smiled confusedly. She didn’t think anything she’d said was particularly funny, in fact, it was all rather serious, but she couldn’t deny how amazing it was to hear Andrea Rojas laugh out loud.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Miss Rojas said, trying to regain her composure. “Thank you,” she said accepting a towel from one of the hurried assistants, and passing it along to Kara who thanked her with a smile.

Kara started drying off her face and hair while Miss Rojas continued.

“You’re absolutely right, Kara, it’s not fair at all. And it makes for a dangerous game,” she explained. “It’s easier for me to let a reporter such as yourself exhaust oneself by being kept on hold by multiple secretaries for days until they eventually give up than to deny someone an interview.”

Kara’s eyes widened. “That’s what you did with me too!”

Miss Rojas laughed.

“Exactly. But you were very persistent,” she smirked. “You weren’t satisfied by any half-answers, you continued to pursue your story.” She looked at Kara appreciatively. “I admire that. It hasn’t happened before. People usually give up after they’ve talked to four or five assistants. You didn’t. In fact,” she laughed, “I think you exhausted them more than they did you.”

Kara blushed.

“Look,” Miss Rojas took pity on her, and leaned in closer to Kara, who instinctively moved closer too. “Say I were to deny an interview with, for example, CatCo,” she gestured to Kara, who was still patting her arms dry, before covering them up with the coat again, “what’s there to stop them from theorising about just why I won’t give out interviews? What’s to stop them from spreading rumours about me being a stuck-up bitch who terrorises her employees and has children working in the basement of her building to sew the clothes she sells?”

“I don’t think you’re a stuck-up bitch,” Kara said quickly.

She inwardly groaned. What a way to go, Kara. Really. Way to sound like a stupid, empty-headed, blonde infatuated teenager!

But Miss Rojas seemed to appreciate it. She smiled, softly, this time, forgoing her usual grin or smirk.

“Thank you, Kara. That’s a very sweet thing of you to say. I also don’t believe you would ever invent such a story about people like me.”

Kara nodded eagerly. Of course she wouldn’t! It went against every reporter code there was!

“But you get where I’m coming from now, I hope?” Miss Rojas implored softly.

Kara nodded slowly, putting the now wet towel down in her lap. She hadn’t thought about it that way.

“Of course. I’m sorry, I hadn’t considered that before,” she said before adding. “I’m sorry for pushing. I didn’t mean to make your life harder.”

Miss Rojas waved her concerns away. “Nonsense. From what I heard, it seems you were under a lot of pressure from your boss.”

Kara blushed. Of course Miss Rojas had overheard her full-blown crazy rant to the receptionist downstairs.

“Well, yeah, she’s been pretty insistent on my getting this interview.”

Miss Rojas grinned again. “And that would be Miss Luthor, am I correct?”

Kara nodded. She really didn’t want to think about Lena right now.

“Hmm,” Miss Rojas hummed, looking can’t say thoughtful.“I can't say that I’ve had any business dealings with her, but I do know some people who’ve worked with her on several projects,” she looked at Kara again. “I can’t recall them saying that she was anything but correct towards her employees.”

Kara felt herself shrink inwardly. Miss Rojas looked at her closely, almost scrutinizing.

“So why would she be so particularly hard on you?”

Oh Rao, Kara wanted to sink through the uncomfortable leather seat right this second. She could not have this conversation. She couldn’t lie, something told her that Miss Rojas would be able to see through whatever flimsy excuse Kara would be able to come up with. The truth wasn’t exactly an option either, since it all came down to her Super secret.

She eventually settled on: “It’s a really long story,” and hoped for the best.

Miss Rojas nodded slowly.

“I see,” she said matter-of-factly. “Then I guess you’ll have to tell me some other time, when we both have more time on our hands.”

Kara smiled. “That sounds good.”

By then she’ll for sure have thought of some great excuse that would fool even Andrea Rojas.

The older woman smiled back, and for just a short moment, Kara was content to just look the other woman in the eye and enjoy their relative closeness. But of course, a moment like that couldn’t last.

“I’m sorry, Miss Rojas,” one of the assistants – Jane ? – said.

Kara was usually better at remembering names, but Miss Rojas had her so entranced, she honestly couldn’t care less what this woman’s name was. Besides, she’d interrupted a perfect moment between them, and it made Kara feel just a little bit cranky. At least now she knew why Miss Grant was always frustrated with her whenever she had to call her boss away from Rob Lowe when they were having an intimate moment.

“What?” Miss Rojas sounded just as irritated as Kara felt, and she couldn’t help but smile at the idea that maybe Miss Rojas wanted to spend more time with her too.

“I’m sorry, ma’am, but you have a dinner reservation at Vin en Or at six thirty. You still wanted to stop by your apartment for an outfit change?” the woman told Miss Rojas apologetically.

Miss Rojas closed her eyes and sighed. Kara could feel her own stomach sink.

She was surprised to note how good the conversation had felt. It had been the most relaxed she’d been in three weeks. Andrea Rojas was smart, interesting and witty, and unfortunately the exact type of friend Kara needed right now. The conversation had flowed so naturally, and the woman had been so kind, and Kara was embarrassed to admit that she craved more of the woman’s time, more of the woman’s attention. She wanted to stay in this hall, on this uncomfortable seat for much, _much_ longer, and soak up the woman’s words.

“Well, Kara,” the woman said regretfully, “it seems our talk has run its course.”

She stood up and Kara followed suit.

“So it seems. Can I ask you one last question though?” she added as an afterthought.

Miss Rojas smiled and nodded. “I think you’re probably the only reporter I’d let ask me a question,” and Kara blushed.

“Well, that was my question really.” Miss Rojas looked puzzled. “Why did you explain all of this to me?” Kara clarified. “Don’t you think I’m going to run off to CatCo now and spread this story?”

Miss Rojas nodded in understanding.

“Well, Kara,” she said, taking the damp towel from her and giving it to an assistant without looking away from Kara, “I have to say that no one, not a single reporter has ever actually called my bluff and come down here. Mostly people just,” she shrugged, “give up.”

She took a step closer to Kara, who was now close enough that if she were to reach her hand out, she would feel the soft fabric of Miss Rojas suit. The thought made her hot all over again.

“And,” the woman murmured, “I can’t deny that you’re a lovely woman, Kara. Hearing you scare my personnel so passionately did intrigue me endlessly,” she quirked an eyebrow. “I just had to take a closer look and see who you were for myself.”

Kara was speechless. This sort of thing never happened to her. Ever! People never thought she was interesting. They never wanted to get to know her! Well, except for – no, she wouldn’t go there.

“Well, I think we have to say goodbye now, Kara. It is time for me to go entertain some boring old business men,” she added with a wink.

Kara nodded.

“Oh wait!” she suddenly remembered, and went to take off her coat.

“No, no!” Miss Rojas protested, and Kara halted her movements in confusion. Miss Rojas smiled at Kara. “Keep the coat. It’s starting to get cold out there. I wouldn’t want you to freeze.”

“But Miss Rojas,” Miss Rojas held up her hand.

“I insist, Kara. Please,” she looked Kara up and down and a smile tugged on her lips. “You look better in it than I do anyway.”

Kara smiled back, feeling warm and fuzzy all over.

“Thank you, truly,” she said, knowing that any protests would be in vain. Then, another assistant came over to whisper to Miss Rojas that her car had arrived, and Kara felt her smile fade away again. She felt a pang of disappointment in her stomach. And not just because she had to go back to CatCo empty handed.

As if the woman could read her mind, she snapped her fingers and a different blonde assistant came running. Kara looked puzzled as Miss Rojas took something small from her assistant’s hand. Then, the older woman turned back to Kara and slipped her a white piece of paper. Her card.

On it, it said:

Andrea Rojas

Rojas Fashion Industries

84, Third Avenue, National City

And right beneath it were ten glorious numbers in perfect black ink, pressed deeply into the thick white paper of the card. The numbers to Kara’s salvation.

She looked up at Miss Rojas with big eyes. Did this mean what she thought it did?

“Since I’ve already tortured you enough with all these random no-good phone calls, I figured you’ve earned an actual shot at this interview,” the woman said with a big smile. “I’m convinced that after our conversation today, you’ll give me a fair assessment in whatever article you manage to concoct.”

She winked at Kara.

Actually winked!

Kara couldn’t help a grin from spreading on her face. Her job was in the clear! She had it! She had her interview! She did it, she actually got it! Kara had to stop herself from squealing and jumping up and down. This woman just saved her ass!

“Thank you, thank you! Really,” she gushed. “I can’t thank you enough, honestly, you’re the best! I can’t – ”

Miss Rojas held up her hand, indicating for Kara to stop rambling, but she did so with a smile. Kara shut up, and looked at the woman with so much admiration.

“There’s no need to thank me, Kara, you deserve this. You earned it. Now,” she put on a black stylish coat that someone had just handed to her, and an umbrella was opened a few feet in front of them. “I’ll have my driver take you home, just tell him your address, and no,” she looked at Kara sternly when the latter was just about to object, “I insist! No offence, my darling, but you look as if you’ve just been walking around in the middle of hurricane season! If we want to have that interview done, I’d like to assure that you survive your trip home without drowning, don’t you think so?”

Kara could do nothing but nod.

Miss Rojas smiled warmly, and Kara noted for the first time that the woman had some tiny crinkles around her eyes that she attributed to a life filled with laughter. It made Kara feel inexplicably fuzzy inside.

Rao, she liked this woman. She felt the familiar ‘Rao-I-wish-she-were-my-friend’ feeling rise up again. She’d felt it a lot over the years. With Lucy, with Lena, even with Miss Grant there was a definite sense of trying so hard to get the woman to appreciate, if not just tolerate her.

But right now, Kara thought the feeling might be mutual.

“Till next time, Miss Danvers,” Miss Rojas said, and Kara smiled dumbly. “Call me,” she added with a smirk before turning her back on Kara and marching out, already typing away on a phone that had been handed to her.

Kara watched as the woman left the building, immediately sheltered by an umbrella before the rain could even try and touch one hair on her perfect head. The darkness of her coat and umbrella, paired with the greyness of the weather outside, made the woman almost invisible, were it not for her pale suit.

Miss Rojas ducked inside a sleek black Maserati, the door of which had been held open by a driver in an equally impressive dark suit. He closed the door, took his place in the front of the car, and drove away. With that, Kara’s view of Miss Rojas disappeared in the rain.

She felt a slight tugging in her stomach, as if there was a physical longing there. She wanted to see Miss Rojas again. And not in two weeks, no, she wanted to see the woman again as soon as possible.

“Excuse me, Miss,” a rough voice called out to her. Kara’s eyes left the retreating car and she turned to face a begrudging looking Mister Ericson. “There’s a car ready for you, per Miss Rojas’ instructions,” he sighed deeply, before mumbling. “And I of course apologise for my irrational behaviour earlier on. It was out of bounds, and I assure you, it will most definitely not happen again.”

Kara had a feeling she knew whom Miss Rojas had been texting earlier on, and she felt warm all over again. She resisted the urge to look back to where she knew the car wouldn’t be anymore.

“Oh,” Kara’s eyes widened, “It’s all good, really. No hard feelings.”

Mister Ericson seemed grateful for the matter to have been handled this quickly. His uncomfortably gruff expression went to just gruff in a manner of seconds.

“Fantastic, follow me please.”

Kara took one last look around her before following the security guard to the elevator leading to the car park below the building.

She smiled to herself.

Miss Rojas had definitely been an interesting woman, and Kara couldn’t wait to see her again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you so much for reading! Please let me know what you think, either here or on my tumblr:  
> https://thingsanddreamsandstuff.tumblr.com


	5. Chapter 5

When Kara woke up the next day, she instantly wished she hadn’t.

Her headache had reached its most painful point yet, and black spots obscured her vision.

“Oh Rao,” Kara gasped. Her voice was hoarse, and so painful. She tried to swallow, but it made the ache in her throat even more pronounced.

Kara closed her eyes and tried to sit up straight, placing her weight on her elbows. The second she sat up, her entire body started to shiver. Her arms trembled, the pounding in her head increased, and Kara cried out as she buried her forehead in her knees. Her entire body felt ice cold as her blankets slipped down her body.

Her alarm blared loudly, and she blindly tried to turn it off by tapping her hand on her nightstand uselessly until she found it.

She had to get up. She had to go to CatCo, there was a big meeting today. She had to tell Lena and James that she got the interview and that she should be able to keep her job. She needed to get dressed, she needed to leave.

Gathering all the courage she had, Kara opened her eyes, shakily swung her legs off her bed, and stood up.

That was a bad decision.

Her stomach lurched, and Kara felt as if the wind had been knocked from her lungs. Whatever she had managed to hold down last night was quickly making its way back up. Making a split decision, Kara ran to her bathroom, but tripped over a dress on her floor and smacked to her knees.

Kara cried out when blinding hot pain shot through her knees. Her dinner was quickly coming back up though, so she crawled to the toilet on her knees, grabbed her hair in one trembling hand, and threw up into the bowl.

After what seemed like arguably the worst five minutes of her life on earth, Kara sank back against the wall, and closed her eyes. The room was still spinning, and her head was still pounding, but at least her stomach felt slightly less upset than it had before. She turned to look at the clock on her bathroom wall and sighed. She had to get up for work now or she would be late. And Kara honestly believed that being late one more time would earn her lifetime ban from CatCo from Lena.

So, she sucked it up.

Kara dragged herself upright, seeking support from the bathroom wall and her bath and managed to get back on her feet. Literally.

With small steps on shaky legs, Kara succeeded in walking all the way back to her closet, and with trembling hands, she found a soft cream coloured woollen sweater and some stretchy jeans, which would have to make due. Even when she was fully clothed, Kara still felt cold, and she felt shivers run down her spine repeatedly, making her arms break out in goose bumps every time.

Kara mindlessly grabbed her bag from where she’d dropped it by the door the night before, and brought her trembling hand up to the doorknob.

She had to go to CatCo, she had to. But dear Rao she felt awful.

Kara coughed, a sickly wet cough that burned her throat, and left it raw and painful. She struggled to turn the doorknob, having absolutely no force left in her arms.

At that moment, Kara felt like crying. She was weak, sick, and she couldn’t even open her damn door. A part of her wanted to call in sick, but she knew it would be her own suicide. Lena would personally have a box with her personal belongings from CatCo delivered to her doorstep. Kara felt a sense of hopelessness fall over her. She closed her eyes, and slowly leaned her forehead against the wooden door.

She had to leave. She had to. She couldn’t have gotten this far just to get fired. She’d beaten the odds, every single step of the way, from calling Miss Grayson to actually talking to the woman in person. It couldn’t end here. It couldn’t end with her fainting on her own doorstep.

Kara opened her eyes, and frowned when she spotted a dark mess on her floor. Upon further inspection, she saw it was the dark coat Miss Rojas had given her the day before, which she’d so carelessly let fall to the floor when she’d gotten home.

Kara smiled softly, and gently picked it up. She brought it to her nose, and was surprised to note that the delicious flowery smell of her perfume still lingered inside the fabric. It felt like a sign. It was Andrea Rojas’ promise to her. She would get that interview, and she would impress Snapper and James and everyone who’d doubted her. She got it. She just had to go to CatCo and tell Lena. She could do that.

Kara slipped on the black coat, instinctively nuzzling the soft faux-fur around her shoulders. Jasmine. Vanilla. May rose.

Kara nodded to herself. It was time. She took a deep breath, gathered her strength, and turned her doorknob. Only three flights of stairs, one bus ride, a ten-minute walk, and she’d be at CatCo.

“Piece of cake,” Kara whispered to herself.

She closed the door behind her, and headed for CatCo.

* * *

When she arrived at CatCo, she quickly crossed the bullpen, trying to ignore how awfully busy it seemed today. Her senses felt invaded by an excess of light, colours and noise. It seemed like every person at work today wanted to greet her or talk to her.

She smiled at Benny from accounting when he passed by her with a cup of coffee and a friendly, “good morning.” The smell of coffee usually woke her right up and let her bask in the feeling of morning and freshness. Today it just made her stomach turn.

Two other reporters – Jenna and Tony – greeted her with warm smiles and loud, “hey Kara’s!” that made Kara flinch inwardly. But it didn’t stop there. It seemed like everyone at CatCo had something to say to her that morning.

“Sorry to hear about Miss Luthor, Kara!”

“Don’t worry about it, we all have problems with the boss sometimes!”

“Morning, Kara! There’s some donuts left in the break room. I think there’s still some jelly-filled ones left if you hurry!”

“Don’t let the man get you down, girl!”

“Hey Kara, thanks for the birthday cake you made last week, really made my day!”

“Morning!”

“Sucks about the Luthor, Kara. Knew we shouldn’t have let them take over CatCo.”

“Kara, I left the spreads for the fashion article on your desk. Get back to me about an article on how the show went, okay?”

“Hey Kara! Love the coat, so cool! Where’d you get it?”

“Oh my God, Kara! I texted you like a billion times! Do you think that now that you’re out to Lena as you-know-who that I should tell her I’m the other you-know-who?”

Kara had her fill when Nia started asking questions.

“Let me get back to you, Nia,” she said, rubbing the spot between her eyebrows.

Rao, had the walk to her office always been this long and disorienting? Kara had to fight to keep a smile on her face, as she stumbled her way across the bullpen. Finally, freaking _finally_ , she got to her office. She set her bag down on her chair, swaying slightly on her feet as she did so, and took off her coat. She dug around in her bag until she retrieved both the questions she’d written down the day before, and the card Miss Rojas had given her, her evidence that she would be able to get an interview with the woman.

She looked up when someone knocked on the glass door to her office. James was motioning with his head for her to follow.

The meeting. Right.

Kara stood up straight, which turned out not to be the greatest idea, as the world started spinning again. She focussed on one of the framed CatCo covers in her office – one that featured Cat sitting on her desk with crossed arms and a haughty expression on her face – to try and make the room stop spinning.

It was working. Now she only needed to focus on breathing again. She could do that. She could.

_Okay, Kara, breathe._

Kara closed her eyes, and took some deep breaths, trying to steady herself. She could do this. She was Kara Zor-El Danvers, and she didn’t back down from a fight. Not from a literal one, and not from one that would decide the fate of her career. She was ready.

She opened her eyes, grasped the papers in her hand firmly and headed for the big meeting room.

* * *

The meeting room was a bland, white room with a big round table which was currently seating at least forty people from all kinds of CatCo departments, but it was still one of Kara’s favourite CatCo spots for one reason only. One of the walls was constructed completely out of glass, and had an amazing view of National City. Every meeting she’d ever attended in that room had made for some amazing daydreaming material. She could see the skyscrapers dominating the skyline; she could see the weather changing. It was majestic. And, on a good day, when she actually had her powers, Kara could see all the tiny people in all the tiny offices in all these skyscrapers, right from that room.

There was a big screen in the front of the room, which, today, projected one of Lena’s meticulous L-Corp presentations. It featured graphs, photographs for the newest magazine, to-do lists, comments, feedback and more. It was a presentation so well put-together that it could only be attributed to Lena. Kara could only guess how many hours she spent designing those things.

She remembered one time that Kara had come over to Lena’s apartment to watch a movie, and Lena had spent at least half of their time together frowning over an iPad, declaring that she’d be “done in a minute,” every time Kara asked her when she would be ready. Even though Kara always berated Lena for working too hard, she couldn’t deny she’d still take Lena working next to her over no Lena at all. Because even when Lena was working hard, she still hummed and answered all of Kara’s questions. She would still laugh along to the movie from time to time, and shift closer to Kara whenever a sad scene came up. And when Kara was on the verge of falling asleep, Lena would drape a blanket over her legs, her eyes never leaving the iPad on her lap.

She cared for Kara, even when she was busy trying to revolutionise the bioengineering world of today.

It was just one of the things Kara thought of when she entered the room. Lena was near the front, talking with one of the editors in hushed tones. She never even saw Kara come in.

Kara took a seat at the far end of the room, slipping into a chair next to Nia.

“Hey,” the younger woman whispered, leaning in close, “Kara.”

Kara raised her head, and smiled tiredly at her friend, who immediately looked shocked.

“Jesus Christ, Kara! You look awful!” she exclaimed in horror. “What the hell happened to you?”

Kara sighed. “I’m just a little under the weather, Nia, no big deal. I’m planning on spending the weekend under some sunlamps.”

Nia didn’t look reassured at all.

“But, I mean,” she trailed off.

She absolutely couldn’t hide the horror on her face.

“Kara, your eyes! They’re bloodshot! And your skin, are you sweating? Cause I don’t think I’ve ever seen you sweat before.”

Her eyes widened.

“Not that that’s a bad thing of course,” she laughed nervously, “I mean you look good all the time! Even now, when you’re all sweaty and dead – not that you wouldn’t look good dead! I mean, not like that, I just – ”

Kara watched with big eyes as Nia rambled on. She could barely manage to follow the girl’s words on a good day, so this was a pretty impossible feat.

“Nia,” she rested one of her cold clammy hands on Nia’s with a tired smile. “It’s alright. I know what you mean.”

Nia looked relieved, and even smiled back hesitantly. Kara patted Nia’s hand in reassurance.

“And hey,” she whispered, Nia’s head snapping up to listen when she heard the conspiratorial tone in Kara’s voice, “maybe when I get my powers back we can see about fighting the bad guys again,” Kara smiled.

Nia’s face lit up. “Really? I mean,” she shook her head, “that would be awesome! I’ll get my suit out, it’ll be so cool!” she gushed loudly. “We could go flying, we could – oh.”

Seeing the panic in Kara’s eyes, Nia quickly realised she’d messed up. She looked around the room suspiciously trying to see if anyone could have overheard their conversation. Luckily, the room was only just starting to fill up, and people were quietly talking among themselves.

Nia looked at Kara apologetically. “Sorry,” she whispered, “I’ll try and be more careful with the whole superhero thing.”

Kara smiled tiredly. Crisis averted. She shouldn’t be so tough on Nia. The girl was just enthusiastic. Like Kara had been years ago, after her and Winn had gotten together to talk superhero strategies. She remembered those days fondly. Things had been so much easier back then.

Kara brought a hand to her forehead. She did feel warm. And sweaty. Rao, this wasn’t good. James and Nia hadn’t been wrong.

Her head pounded, and she still felt cold, but she was happy she could at least talk to her friend again. From the corner of her eye, she could see James take a seat in the front of the room, close to Lena. She wanted to talk to Nia some more – she’d been neglecting the girl due to her fight with Lena, and it was absolutely unfair to her younger protégé – but then Lena started the meeting, and Kara quietly turned to face her.

“Good morning everyone,” Lena said with her best business voice, a pleasant smile plastered on her face. She was wearing a beautiful long-sleeved black dress, more modest than her favourite party dresses, but still formfitting, and downright gorgeous. “I’m glad you all could make it,” Lena continued, “I have some notes that I would quickly like to go through.”

Lena tapped away on her iPad.

“Ah, here it is,” she looked around until she saw Snapper. “Mister Carr,” she addressed the man, “I have some questions about what articles you wanted to save for our next edition and which ones were incremental for our September edition. Could you care to walk me through your thought-process?”

When Kara saw that Lena wasn’t immediately going to address her, she started to relax a bit more. She had some time. She was prepared. Lena couldn’t fault her for that. She’d been a good employee. She had her notes, she had her questions. She even took Miss Rojas’ personal card out, and tucked it between her thumb and index finger, almost like a good luck charm.

Lena went over several slides of her presentation, and the minutes ticked by. She talked to editors, photographers, representatives of the fashion department, and even some reporters. Kara hadn’t been called on yet.

Kara did start to feel more and more uncomfortable. The air had become thicker, less forgiving. It was as if someone had forgotten to air out the bathroom after a long shower. The air was too hot, and it was thick enough to choke her.

Kara could feel her breaths becoming heavier, more strained. Her lungs ached, trying to stay on the right rhythm. In fact, Kara frowned; she heard a loud thudding in her ears that somehow drowned out the noise of Lena talking. Her heartbeat, she realised. It was loud, and fast, and painful. It was a strange sensation, like being underwater. She could vaguely register that Lena was talking to some man, but her own breathing, and her own heartbeat were somehow louder.

Kara started to worry. She was embarrassed. Couldn’t the other people in the room hear her breathing? Rao, she was practically rasping like a dog right about now. Couldn’t they hear the same loud thudding she did? Her heart was beating too fast, and to hard! It hurt her chest. Her steady heartbeat started beating at the same rhythm her headache did.

She wanted to look around to see if anybody else had noticed, but the room started spinning too much. Kara tried to focus her eyes on one point – that had helped her earlier this week, and in her office this morning. She started seeing black edges around her vision. Rao, they couldn’t change into spots again, or she’d be blind again.

Next to her, Nia seemed to be listening attentively, completely unaware of Kara’s distress. Kara started panicking. Could nobody see this? Could nobody see her fear? Her body was wrong; she knew it was! Something was happening to her, but she didn’t know what. It was like someone had messed up her settings and had put all the reactors to extreme, causing her entire body to short-circuit.

This wasn’t good, this definitely wasn’t good! She needed to call Alex right now! She needed –

“Kara?”

Kara looked up to see Lena staring down at her expectantly.

Oh crap. Oh crap.

“How is that interview with Miss Rojas coming along? Could you care to talk to us about your progress?” she scribbled some things down in pen, before looking up at Kara again.

Kara cleared her throat – Rao, that hurt – and stood up straight. The world immediately felt wrong. The room was turning, and her headache! Rao, her headache! It was too much. She could feel her legs tremble, her knees about to give out. She closed her eyes briefly, trying to get the upper hand.

She just had to go through this meeting, and then she could go see Alex.

“Yes, thank you Miss Luthor,” Kara said in a shaky voice, “I went – um,” she coughed “I’m sorry – I went down to Rajos fashion Industries, and – ”

Oh no. The black spots were back. They were obstructing her vision completely. This couldn’t happen right now. She just had to –

“Excuse me,” Kara rasped, her heartbeat thrumming in her ears, “I don’t feel so good.”

Then she fainted.

* * *

Lena had a cramp.

Her hand hurt from scribbling down all the different things the people around her had mentioned. Every single one of their remarks had to be accounted for in the final version of the magazine. It was long, it was tedious, and it had to be done. She was too much of a control freak to let others do it for her, and was too scared to lose any of the information to just let it be typed into her iPad. She forced herself to write down every detail by hand, to memorise it completely, and to know with absolute certainty, that nothing – nothing – could go wrong in the printing process.

God, she did not know how Cat Grant did it. It was tiring.

Finally though, it was Kara’s turn. Lena had been efficient in ignoring her all morning. Of course she’d seen Kara. She was impossible to miss. She was like the only lightbulb in a dark room. Lena couldn’t help but be drawn to her. And she was everywhere, even when she wasn’t around. Lena heard people talking about her at work – all positive things, of course – and she had to read and reread all of Kara’s wonderfully written articles.

When she turned on the TV, there was Supergirl, saving the day. Putting out fires, retrieving balloons, and fighting the National City criminals who just really should know better by now.

She was in the air, in the smell of soft washing powder and some sweet Marc Jacobs perfume she loved so much. Lena never cared much about Marc Jacobs until Kara had mentioned some time that it was her favourite. Now Lena owned several gift boxes of every floral perfume, just in case Kara ever ran out and couldn’t find it again. It was sad, bordering on pathetic, really, but she just couldn’t stop imagining how disappointed Kara would be if were ever sold out. Hence her closet overflowing with plastic-wrapped perfume boxes.

Lena saw Kara’s touches all over her office. There was her filing system that had never been changed, because it was so fucking well organised. There were the CatCo covers Lena knew Kara had framed because she loved them so much. Even the coffee machine in the break-room was only there because Kara had managed to convince Cat it would improve her employee’s productivity if they could get caffeine without having to go outside to get it.

Kara was everywhere.

It was exhausting.

One part of Lena wanted to never see her face again. She wanted to ignore Kara, forget she ever existed, forget she was ever stupid enough to let her walls down for someone who still, deep down, considered her the worst of the worst. She wanted to be able to see her as just another employee. Someone she didn’t care about. But God – every time she saw Kara’s face, it was as if all reason left Lena’s head. All the anger she thought she had supressed came back with a vengeance, and she couldn’t help but lash out.

Like a child.

Lena shook her head.

The other part of her was still so incredibly obsessed with her.

Kara Danvers had been everything Lena was not. She was kind, light-hearted, loving, and so full of joy. And she’d let Lena – Lena! Dark, cold, unforgiving Lena – into her life, like it was the most natural thing in the world. She’d shared her love for movies and tea and sticky buns with her, let her cosy up next to her on her old couch, and had even put her head in Lena’s lap when she got scared or tired during movie nights.

She’d also introduced Lena to the wonderful world that was the National City Aquarium. Apparently, Kara loved watching the fishes, oohing and aahing at every single one of them.

Lena had taken so many pictures the day that Kara had first taken her there. Mostly of Kara, but the other girl hadn’t noticed that until she’d scanned through Lena’s photos on her phone later that afternoon. She’d blushed, and said that the fishes were much more interesting to photograph, but Lena wholeheartedly disagreed.

Kara had been so beautiful in that aquarium. The waves of the water reflected on her pale skin. Her big blue eyes somehow got even bigger when she was looking at the sea creatures in awe. Her mouth had been opened slightly, almost like a child, so amazed by the wonders of the underwater world. She’d looked so much like a mythical creature that day.

Lena was sure that that was the day she fell head over heals in love with Kara Danvers.

And one month later Supergirl implied that Lena was just as much a Luthor as Lex or Lillian was, and had completely broken her heart in the process.

Kara was inescapable. And seeing at work only made it harder. And then –

“… I don’t feel so good.”

Lena looked up from her notes to see Kara sway on her feet before falling to the ground.

The minute her body hit the ground, before Lena’s brain could even catch on to the idea that _Kara_ , sweet Kara was hurt, that she was on the floor; the room erupted into chaos.

People jumped up from their chairs, yelling all at once, running over to Kara, poking her, dragging her up, yelling at her to wake her up.

“No, no,” they couldn’t do that.

No no no no no.

They couldn’t do that.

“Get away from her!” Lena yelled out in panic, leaving her spot and running over.

She barely noticed her iPad falling to the floor, or her thick stack of papers slipping from her fingers, scattering across the room. She caught sight of James following directly behind her.

“You’re crowding her, leave her alone!”

Lena was aware she was basically screeching by now, but she couldn’t help it. Someone had hurt her, someone had hurt Kara! Kara was falling, Kara was on the floor! They were suffocating her!

On her way to Kara, she scanned the room, but she couldn’t spot the familiar green glow anywhere? Where was it? Someone must’ve brought kryptonite into the building but how? She’d installed kryptonite scanners five days after she’d found out about Kara’s identity. How could they have gotten past those? Lena had made sure they were fool proof. And who here was willing to hurt Kara? Lena had single-handedly run intensive background-checks on every single employee to make sure none of them were affiliated with any anti-alien or anti-Supergirl group. So who –

Lena reached Kara, and her heart got caught in her throat. Kara lay sprawled down on the floor, paler than Lena had ever seen her before. One arm was thrown over her torso; the other was curled on the space beside her head, as if she was merely pretending to be a ballerina in the midst of a meeting. Her glasses were askew on her face, and Lena couldn’t help but panic.

“Get away from her! Get her some space!” she yelled hysterically.

Luckily, her employees obeyed, probably alarmed by a maniac-looking Luthor, and moved backwards, until Lena found some space around her. Lena fell to her knees and frantically studied Kara’s face, but was left bewildered when she could find no sign of the typical green veins that Kara always spotted after a kryptonite attack. Her veins were the same pale blue colour shining through her almost-translucent skin as they always were. Was this some new form of kryptonite? One Lena and the D.E.O. just hadn’t encountered yet?

Lena carefully lifted Kara’s head, and set it onto her lap, pulling the hair away from her face, and setting her glasses straight. A part of Lena’s body rejoiced in the familiar sensation of Kara laying down on her lap like in the past, as if her body saw it as some sort of ghost limb that had been missing for too long. But Lena couldn’t think about that now. Kara was hurt. Lena had to find out how.

Lena bowed over Kara, never letting her hands move away from the other girl’s face. There were blue-ish bags under her eyes, her skin was paler than it usually was, but the only thing that really stood out was her temperature. Kara had always been warm to the touch – Lena’s personal little heater in winter, they’d once joked – but now she was too hot. Scorching hot. Kara had a fever and she was burning up. She needed medical attention.

“Somebody get Alex Danvers on the phone!” Lena yelled, not looking away from Kara.

 _C'mon Kara_ , she thought. _Wake. Up._ She heard confused mumbling around the room, but she couldn’t care less.

“Ma’am, don’t you think it’s better – ”

“Just do it!” Lena cut him off harshly.

When nobody reacted, she cursed. Directing her head towards her desk she called out: “L-Phone!” Lena’s phone turned on.

“Send an S.O.S to Alex Danvers.”

She had that feature built into her phone two days after Reign threw Supergirl off that building. Just in case they ever needed to get somewhere fast.

Lena looked down again.

Kara didn’t move. She didn’t budge. She just lay there, and Lena’s heart broke. With a trembling hand, she put her fingers on Kara’s throat, almost afraid of the silence that could possibly follow. She almost sobbed in relief when she felt a rhythmical thudding against her index and middle finger. Kara still had a heartbeat, she was still alive.

“Kara, can you hear me? Kara?” her voice broke. “Kara, I’m right here, okay? I’m not leaving, I’m right here.”

Her hands stroked Kara’s cheeks, the usual blush so dreadfully absent that it could make Lena mourn. Lena was slowly rocking her body back and forth, back and forth.

“I’m not leaving. I’m not leaving, Kara. Can you hear me? Can you – ” She let out a sob.

From the corner of her eye, she could see Nia Nal crying her eyes out, in complete and utter panic.

“Is she going to be okay? Lena, is Kara okay?”

Lena could see her shrugging off other people’s comforting hands dramatically, looking absolutely horrified. Lena couldn’t blame her.

“Is she still breathing?” Nia’s voice broke, and Lena didn’t know how to comfort her.

She truly didn’t. She just nodded once, but Nia still cried.

“Your sister is coming, Kara. Help is coming, just… just hang on, okay?”

Kara’s face didn’t so much as twitch. Her lips were turning paler too. Instead of that pink colour her beautiful laugh always sported, her lips were now turning a dreadful purplish shade. Lena noticed some wet drops on Kara’s face, and frowned. Where was all that water coming from?

Lena wiped the spots away, but they kept coming. Big splatters, falling on Kara’s face, before rolling down her cheeks, like she was crying. But she wasn’t. She was unconscious.

Lena felt someone squeeze her shoulder, before dropping to their knees beside her. James. Of course! He would know.

She quickly turned to look at him. He looked concerned.

“What’s wrong with her?” Lena whispered, unable to keep the terror out of her voice. “It can’t be kryptonite, right? I checked? But what else can it be? I mean she’s – ” Lena cut herself off. She looked around the room suspiciously. Any one of her employees could’ve been the one to hurt Kara.

God, if she found out who was responsible... Her blood started boiling in her veins.

“Lena,” James said in a calm voice, “I don’t think kryptonite has anything to do with this.”

“Yeah, that’s what I was saying!” she whispered hysterically. “So, now we have to find what it was that hurt her! Maybe it’s some new kind of weapon that – ”

“Lena,” James cut her off, and Lena shut up.

She looked at James with big red-rimmed eyes.

“Something happened to Kara, something that made her, well,” he looked around the room, making sure nobody was listening in on them.

Luckily for him, the others were all much too occupied with discussing among themselves what could’ve possibly hurt Kara, as well as trying to calm an utterly frenzied Nia. He leaned in closer to Lena.

“Something that made her not so super anymore.”

Lena leaned back and looked at James in shock.

“You mean,” she looked back at the pale face between her hands. “You mean she’s…” Lena didn’t know what she could say without alerting people who may or may not be eavesdropping. After all, she still wasn’t convinced nobody had planted anything in the room that had infected Kara. Lena struggled to find a word that fit. “You mean she’s more like us?”

James nodded gravely. “I’m afraid so.”

Lena’s thumbs grazed the tips of Kara’s ears, before sliding them down her jaw. This couldn’t be happening.

James’ statement didn’t reassure her in the slightest. If she was human, she would, in theory, be unaffected by any and all substances that could potentially harm Kryptonians if –

Lena’s thoughts suddenly halted.

Kara was human.

Kara was human.

Kara couldn’t be infected by Kryptonite, because she was human. And a lot could be wrong with humans. Humans could suffer from an array of different illnesses and conditions. And Kara was human.

Completely, utterly human.

Kara wasn’t flying around as Supergirl when she was supposed to be at work. She couldn’t have been. Kara was right here, on her lap, powerless.

A full on shiver ran down Lena’s spine.

Kara couldn’t have been late or distracted by superheroing. Kara was human. Kara had been absent at work this week. Showing up late when mere seconds ago Supergirl had been on TV. She’d looked tired and uninterested, leaning heavily on James.

Kara was powerless. She was tired, and probably scared. She was unfamiliar with the feeling of being human.

Lena covered her mouth with a trembling hand and looked at James in horror, and he understood. He stared right back at her, unwavering, and he confirmed everything.

“Oh God, James, I – ”

“Coming through!” Before Lena could finish her sentence, three paramedics made their way through the door and into the room carrying a stretcher and a big medical kit.

“Wait, wait, wait!” Lena called out, “Who called 911?”

“Ma’am, step aside please, we’ll be taking her to the Luthor hospital on – ”

“You can’t take her there!”

She looked at James, who seemed just as panicked as she did. Kara had to get to the D.E.O, that was the only place that could help her. She needed Alex, she needed a sunbed, she needed people who knew who she was, damnit!

When she looked around though, she saw people regarding her wearily.

Lena sighed inwardly.

Of course, it would look awful if a Luthor of all people denied her employee the right to go to a hospital after literally fainting in a conference room. Especially after having treated said employee like shit all week.

Lena looked at the door, but she saw no sign of Alex Danvers storming through the bullpen to get to her sister. They had no other choice.

Lena let her shoulders sag, and looked at James in defeat. They had no other option than to let Kara be taken.

One paramedic, a young man in his late twenties sporting an impressive hipster beard sank down to his knees and looked at Lena. He had a sweet smile, and bright blue eyes. He was exactly Kara’s type, Lena mused.

He exuded so much kindness, so much patience. It threw Lena off a bit.

“Hi,” he introduced himself, “my name is Jim. I’m going to be helping your friend here.”

Lena pulled Kara closer. She couldn’t trust anyone, not even someone with kind eyes and a smile. It could be a trap. They could be trying to abduct Kara and take her away. Take could want to hurt her even more. She wouldn’t let that happen.

Jim noticed Lena’s protectiveness, and he didn’t try to move closer.

“It’s alright now,” he said, “we’re going to take care of her, alright?”

He looked behind him and pointed to the stretcher.

“We’ll just gently put her on the stretcher, and get her down to the hospital. But first, we’re going to check to see what’s wrong with her. To see if maybe she needs some quick fixing before we leave. If you want,” he added, trying to catch her eye, “we can even let you drive with us in the ambulance.”

Lena looked at Kara. She hadn’t improved. She hadn’t woken up. She looked just as pale and miserable as she had when she first fainted. Lena’s hand had warmed up considerably from staying on Kara’s feverish skin.

She needed help.

Lena nodded, and slowly – ever so slowly – lifted her hands from Kara’s face. Jim nodded while she did, and when her hands had freed up, he motioned for the other paramedics to help him. Together, they swiftly lifted Kara up, put her on the stretcher, and started to perform some small medical tests to see where she was at. They moved so quickly and efficiently that Lena barely had time to see what was going on. Lena stood up too, quickly grabbing hold of Kara’s hand.

Kara hated being alone. She loved having dinner parties and sleepovers because that meant fun, and togetherness with the small circle of people she trusted. She was scared of storms and sadness, and she needed company to drive those things away. Lena also knew – more from observation than from actually being told – that Supergirl liked Alex to be around when she had to have surgery, or when she needed to spend time under the sunlamps. She wouldn’t voice it out loud, of course. It was just an unspoken rule in the D.E.O. that whenever something happened to Supergirl, Alex would be there to stay with her.

So Lena knew that Kara wouldn’t want to be alone in an ambulance or in the hospital. She would want someone there with her, if not to hold her hand than just to provide moral support. Or donuts, instead of the gross meals they usually served in medical wards. Plus, Lena thought suddenly, what if she were to wake up and there would be no one to greet her, to explain to her what happened? She would be terrified.

Lena gripped Kara’s hand tighter.

“Is she going to be okay?” Lena had to squeeze the syllables out of her mouth. She was so scared.

The friendly paramedic – Jim – stopped what he was doing to look at her.

“She’s not in any immediate danger,” he said with a friendly smile. “But she’s not doing great. Her temperature is through the roof. We’ll know more after we’ve gotten her to the hospital.”

Lena nodded, and let the men return to their jobs, still stroking the skin on Kara’s hand with her thumb. Kara was going to be alright. She had to be. When the paramedics finished their tests, they nodded to each other, before moving towards the hospital. Lena never let go of Kara.

“James,” Lena called out without looking back, “call Alex again, and come meet us at the hospital.”

Kara’s eyes moved underneath her eyelids.

“And tell her to hurry!”

* * *

Lena leaned against one of the white walls of the hospital waiting area, eyes untrained, ears filtering through the noise phones ringing incessantly, pagers going of, and nurses and doctors hustling about, pushing cards with medication and medical trays.

It sounded more like white noise to her now.

Lena had been in a lot of hospitals in her life. Even though they were all in different places, Lena found they were all exactly alike. Some were fancier than others, true, but all of them had that horrible hospital aura. An aura of pain, disappointment and fear.

They were all equally abhorrent to her, and she always wished she’d never had to stop foot in another one again.

She’d gone to so many different hospitals over time, that she could barely keep count.

Her most recent visit was after Eve’s betrayal, when Alex Danvers had personally accompanied her there to make sure she was alright.

When she was nineteen, and Lionel had had his first heart attack – his first of many. At seventeen when one of her friends had had to get her stomach pumped after a party gone wrong.

At thirteen, when she’d burned her upper arm during one of her garage science experiments. Turns out, just because your older brother has a big lab, doesn’t mean you get automatic access. And garages don’t really have much in the way of protective gear. Lena had had to make due with a bicycle helmet, a kitchen apron and some yellow rubber gloves people used to clean their bathrooms. Lena had had to improvise, she didn’t feel sorry.

At ten she had to go back to the hospital, because she’d broken a leg during a horseback-riding race. Tumbled right off her horse – Madame Curie, a name young Lena had lovingly given the horse. Lillian had been so disappointed she’d had to forfeit the race that she’d refused to accompany Lena to the hospital. The maid, an old woman named Mary who’d worked at the Luthor estate for almost four decades had had to take her. Somehow, her mother not being there to hold her hand had hurt way more than a literal broken bone.

And of course, at the age of four she went to the hospital too, when the doctors brought in her mother and her. Though, Lena remembered, they only brought Lena’s mom in to pronounce her dead. They didn’t fix her. They couldn’t fix her.

She still remembered every second of that day. Perks of having a perfect memory, Lena mused.

Her mother had been almost translucent when they fished her out of the water. Her lips had been blue. And Lena had stood there, all those adults, all those doctors and medical examiners on the shore, yet no one looked at her. She’d stood there, useless. Tiny, in her blue-and-white striped bikini. She’d even wondered whether or not she’d turned invisible without her knowing.

Her mother hadn’t looked like her mother anymore, when they’d fished her out of the water. She was swollen. She was cold. She was different. She was a whole new person, but she wasn’t her mother.

They brought Lena with them to the hospital, where she would have to wait for social services, but she wasn’t in the same car as her mother. She’d driven with a medical examiner who had had absolutely no idea how to address a child. He’d looked slightly panicked when they put her in his ambulance. He’d just let the radio play. In his defence, he tried to make small talk, but there is only so much you can say about the weather to a girl who’s just lost her mother. She still remembered what song they were playing on the radio. It was Killer Queen by Queen.

She still couldn’t stand that song, all those years later.

In the hospital, she’d gotten a blanket to cover her. For the shock, or something.

She’d watched those doctors look at her mother for less than a minute. Then they signed some documents, gave the okay, and her body was driven away on a gurney. Lena never saw her again after that. She only saw a string of social workers, each one less interested in her than the last, before a final woman, a younger one with a big grin on her face and curly hair that looked funny to touch, told her she would be brought to her dad, all the way across the ocean.

And now, Kara. Kara in a hospital. Pale, unconscious Kara. Helpless, and alone.

‘Kara’ and ‘hospital’ seemed like two words that should never be placed in the same sentence. Some sort of horrible conjunction that sickened anyone who heard it.

Some doctors had made Lena step away from Kara. She’d made a scene, of course. She’d yelled, and screamed and threatened to get everybody fired, and that Kara was her friend and that she needed her until her voice had turned hoarse – but it hadn’t mattered. They’d dragged her away, and now she was here.

Maybe Kara was dead too. Maybe she was cold now too. Pale, and blue-lipped, and swollen. On a basic level, she knew that couldn’t be true. Kara hadn’t been in the water. She couldn’t have bloated up.

But she could be dead all the same.

Lena wanted to cry at the thought, she really did, but her eyes had been dried out from all the previous crying. Kara needed her to be strong anyway. Kara needed her.

It shouldn’t have even happened this way. This was all Lena’s fault. She’d had some time to mull things over in her head during the ambulance ride. She’d come to the conclusion that she’d royally fucked up.

All of it made sense now. All of it. And Lena, scientist, universally declared intelligent person, had missed all the signs.

Kara had looked tired. Why would she have looked tired? She was Supergirl. She got her powers – her energy – from the sun! How could Lena have missed that?

Supergirl had been on TV, true, but Lena hadn’t counted on two important factors. One, Kara didn’t act like her usual chipper Supergirl personality. She didn’t stay to say hi to people or to take pictures with fans. She barely even stopped to thank the first responders! That was basically Supergirl’s MO!

And second, Lena had forgotten about J’onn J’onzz, Martian shapeshifter.

How did she not notice? Who cared about having three different diploma’s if she couldn’t even tell her best friend had been replaced by a different friend. Or, acquaintance – work friend. Whatever. She didn’t really know what the gang was to her anymore.

Lena looked up at the ceiling. There were some spider-web cracks in the old paint. It needed a do-over.

A do-over.

It seemed like the whole fucking world needed a do-over.

Lena laughed bitterly. If Kara heard her right now she’d probably call her cynical. Maybe even a cynical dummie if she really wanted to put some force behind the words. And Lena would shoot back that that was just the Luthor way. And Kara would shake her head disapprovingly and say something sweet. Something mushy. Something about Lena being an awesome human slash scientist slash friend who couldn’t possibly do any wrong.

How Lena longed to hear something mushy right about now.

Would Kara still think Lena could do no wrong?

Because no matter how she turned it in her head, Lena had been responsible for putting Kara in the hospital. She should’ve listened the first time James had told her Kara was sick. Back when they were in Lena’s office, when Kara had looked at her as if she were some sort of magical unicorn rainbow miracle. And Lena let herself believe that maybe Kara had missed her too in those two weeks they’d spent without each other.

And then she’d yelled at Kara. She’d told her to get an interview. She’d told her to get her act together. She’d threatened to fire Kara. Lena was the reason Kara had been overworked. It was Lena’s fault that Kara hadn’t taken the time off to rest.

God.

Lena should’ve been there for her. She should’ve been the one to show Kara what medication to use, she should’ve been the one who tucked Kara in with a kiss, just like Kara had done that one time she’d gotten a cold and had been forced to stay home by Eve. Kara had made Lena soup from scratch, and she’d hugged her, and told her to feel better.

And Lena –

She should’ve been there. Instead, she’d destroyed the one person who always tried to help her.

Lena was getting so amped up from all the could-haves and the maybes, she felt like pulling her hair out, or punching a wall. So many things could’ve gone differently! So many things should’ve gone differently! She felt like hurting something. Someone. Or maybe she just wanted someone to hurt her. Someone to blame her.

Where were those infamous Luthor-haters who always showed up to her important events now, huh? Why couldn’t they just shoot her through the head or run her over with a big truck now?

It seems like someone up above was listening, because not ten seconds later, the hospital hall exploded in a blur of yelling and screaming caused by one very angry Danvers woman.

“Where is she?” Alex threw open the door and yelled at the hospital staff with the same level of confidence as if she were raiding a Cadmus base. “Where is my sister?”

She walked up to the nurses’ station and banged her fist on the counter. A redheaded nurse stationed there looked like a deer caught in headlights; absolutely fucking petrified. And Lena could see where she was coming from.

Alex was dressed in her all-black D.E.O. work clothes, looking powerful, sexy and downright murderous. But Lena knew better. Alex was terrified. Not knowing what had happened to her sister must’ve been killing her.

The doors were quickly pushed open again, and James, Kelly, Brainy, Nia, Sam and Ruby poured in.

“Did they tell you where Kara is?” Nia asked.

The hysteria obviously hadn’t gone down in the last half hour, Lena noted.

“W-what is your sister’s name, ma’am?” the nurse stammered, opening a tab on her computer.

“Kara Danvers,” Alex said through gritted teeth. “She was admitted here around a half hour ago.”

The nurse entered the details and sat back. The results seemed to disappoint the woman, because she looked up at Alex with a frightened look.

“Well?” Alex asked impatiently.

“I’m sorry, ma’am,” the nurse stammered, “I don’t know anything yet. The doctors haven’t – ”

“Then get me some information!” Alex said. “Call the operating room, call all the freaking doctors on your staff, because I need to know where she is, right the fuck now!”

“I know where she is,” Lena intervened, stepping away from the wall, and closer to Alex and her posse. Just in time too though, she honestly thought the nurse was going to burst into tears.

Alex’s head snapped up.

“You,” she snarled.

That was the only warning Lena got before she was suddenly pushed back against the wall with all the force of one well-trained D.E.O. director.

Her body hit the wall, and the back of her head crashed against it so hard, she lost the ability to see for a second. Alex blocked her neck with an elbow, and did the same around her torso, so that Lena had no way of getting out from underneath that grip.

“Who. The fuck. Do you think you are?” Alex bit.

She was seething. Her eyes were bulging, and her cheeks were flushed in anger. She was pushing Lena so hard the other woman could barely breathe. But she didn’t even flinch.

“Alex,” Lena started calmly, but she was immediately interrupted, and the elbow against her neck pushed harder. She almost wheezed at the pressure, but didn’t want to appear weak.

“No!” Alex yelled, catching the attention of probably every nurse in the hospital.

Lena sighed inwardly at the headaches she would have tomorrow trying to deal with the tabloids publishing their new article about a Luthor pissing of yet another civilian.

“James told me,” Alex said. “He told me everything.” Lena simply stared back.

“Look, Alex,” Lena started.

“No! You don’t get to fucking talk!”

Lena closed her eyes when spit almost flew out of Alex’s mouth.

“You treated my little sister like shit for no fucking reason! You’re the whole reason she’s in this place! You – ”

“I didn’t know!” Lena yelled back just as angry. She was usually pretty good about hiding how she really felt, but she was just so full of all these different emotions, she needed to yell back. She needed to hurt too. “I didn’t know because you don’t tell me shit!”

Lena lowered her voice and continued: “I saw Supergirl flying about, looking all high and mighty as she rescued some cats from a tree, so how the fuck,” she emphasised the last word with an angry shout, “was I supposed to know, huh?”

Alex’s angry snarl didn’t fade. “You can act like the victim all you want, Luthor, but I swear to you,” she threatened, “I don’t care what Kara says, I’m going to make you pay for this.”

Lena scoffed, and Alex’s scowl deepened.

“God, you’re such a disgusting excuse for a human being,” she exclaimed, “I don’t know what Kara ever saw in you.”

“Yeah, well, you and me both,” Lena retorted angrily.

Alex regarded Lena for a second, her expression unreadable. Then, she took a deep breath to try and calm down.

“You know, Luthor,” Alex said softly, after a while, “I was ready to hurt you so many times. So many goddamn times, that you don’t even fucking know about.”

Lena clenched her jaw. Surprise, surprise.

“You told my sister you hated her.”

Lena flinched at the memory. Of all the things she’d ever said, that was the only she probably regretted the most. All because she wanted to protect herself from the pain she felt.

“When I saw her, that first night,” Alex continued, “I wanted to go over to your place and punch your perfect teeth in. Because you,” she poked her finger painfully against Lena’s chest, “you made her cry.”

Lena swallowed her pain. She wouldn’t give Alex the satisfaction of a reaction. Even if she was dying a little inside knowing she was the one who’d replaced Kara’s beaming smile with tears.

“If it weren’t for Kara literally _begging_ me to make sure you were alright, I wouldn’t have even hesitated.”

That did catch Lena’s attention, and she looked at Alex in shock. Alex shook her head disdainfully when she noticed Lena’s reaction.

“You didn’t know about that one, did you?” she sneered. “While you were out drinking, feeling sorry for yourself after you made my sister feel like shit, Kara was still trying to protect you. She was still looking out for you. She wanted to make sure you wouldn’t do anything stupid. She wanted to make sure _you_ had somebody.”

Alex shook her head in disgust, before stepping away from Lena. The latter took a deep breath as the air rushed back into her lungs, and she rubbed her sore throat.

“I did what she told me. And I stayed with you. And I even felt sorry for you,” Alex sneered. “And then you told Sam,” Alex whispered.

She looked so revolted with Lena, that it did take everything in her not to show how much that hurt.

“You were every bit the Luthor that I always warned Kara about. You took her secret and you acted like a careless rich bitch who’s never had to worry about the consequences to her actions.”

Alex took a step closer to Lena again, but didn’t assault her like before.

“I forgave you then, because it was what Kara wanted. Even though I wanted to fucking _hurt_ you.”

Lena saw tears in the corners of Alex’s eyes, and her stomach dropped.

“And now you put her here,” Alex whispered. “Just like your mom, just like your brother, you put her in a hospital.”

Lena couldn’t take it anymore.

“Then do it!” she said, her voice hoarse from the hurt and the tears. “Hit me. Punch me. Hurt me. Just do it!”

Alex frowned, but didn’t look away. She was hesitating. She obviously wanted to do it. She wanted to hurt Lena for everything she’d ever done to Kara. Lena knew Alex, and she knew the D.E.O. agent’s fists must have been aching to punch her. How many people had she knocked out in her life for looking at Kara the wrong way?

Lena’s voice became louder and louder until she yelled: “Just do it, Alex! Just fucking hurt me already! I deserve it, right?” Her voice broke. “Right?”

Alex didn’t respond.

“God, just hurt me already!”

Alex took a step back, and lifted her arm. Lena closed her eyes. She deserved this. She hurt Kara. She deserved this.

“No! No! You stop that right now!”

Sam.

When Lena opened her eyes again, she saw her old friend holding Alex’s hand in place, and blocking Lena’s body with her own.

“What the fuck, you guys?” Sam whisper-yelled. “What the actual _fuck_?”

Sam looked from Alex to Lena, and her expression was absolutely furious.

“Do you think _this_ is a solution? Do you think this is helping anybody?”

Alex slowly lowered her hand, embarrassed.

“Kara is laying in a hospital bed right now,” Sam whispered angrily, “probably scared out of her mind, and you guys are over here trying to have a fist-fight? Are you _fucking_ kidding me?”

Sam swearing was a pretty rare event to witness. She usually tried to keep her curses to a minimum as not to influence Ruby too much. She even made Lena cut back on the curses in solidarity. But right now, Sam was pissed. She was _fucking_ pissed.

Sam sounded so much like a mom and a confident COO that Lena had to admit that for a split second she forgot about the entire situation, and she was just happy she hired the woman. If she could speak with this kind of power and authority in the boardroom too, Lena was sure the future of L-Corp would be in the pocket.

“You,” Sam turned to Alex, who actually seemed to shrink under her scrutinizing look. “I get that you’re mad at Lena. And you can be pissed at her all you want later, but punching her in the face?”

She stared Alex down, and Alex – almighty, badass, scared-of-absolutely-nothing-and-no-one Alex actually flushed red and hung her head.

“You need to be here for your sister right now, and you know she’s not going to be happy knowing you two broke each other’s noses. So woman up, and let it go for now.” She looked at Alex intently. “Can you do that?”

Alex nodded slowly. She threw Lena one last vitriolic look, before walking away and re-joining the gang, who were all looking at the showdown with open mouths. Most of the nursing staff too.

“And you!”

Lena almost smacked against the wall again when Sam turned around furiously to look at her. She gulped.

“You and I are going to have one hell of a conversation, right. Now.”

Lena lamented her fate as Sam grabbed her by her arm, and dragged her away.

“No, but I – we should, I mean – ” she called out weakly, but Sam ignored her, and shoved her into a dark corner.

When they were standing in the dark, away from everybody else, Lena crossed her arms. “Look, Sam – ”

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

“I – ”

“No!”

Lena was taken aback by the anger in Sam’s voice. While Sam was never afraid to level with Lena – even when she was being irrational and overly threatening – Sam had never actually raised her voice with Lena. She’d always been calm, even when she had to tell Lena she was being stupid. But she never actually looked that angry while doing so –

“Is everything James said true?” Sam asked.

There was a plea in her voice. A plea for her to say it wasn’t so. For her to say that James had somehow twisted the story to make her the bad guy. A plea for Lena not to be the bitch everyone said she was.

“I – ” Lena hesitated, before flinching, and letting her shoulders drop. “Yes,” she whispered, “Yes, it is.”

Sam shook her head in painful disbelief, and Lena felt herself stiffen. Sam was disappointed in her; she knew that. She’d fucked up.

“You really told Kara you were going to fire her?” Sam whispered, almost afraid for the words to be spoken aloud.

Lena flushed in embarrassment. She had.

“I did.”

Sam shook her head, but when she spoke again, her voice was just sad.

“Why, Lena?” she asked desperately. “Why would you do that?”

Lena couldn’t answer. Somehow, ‘she was late to work twice and didn’t pay attention during meetings’ didn’t seem reasonable anymore. But, when she allowed her brain to actually think about it, it hadn’t ever been reasonable. She knew she couldn’t justify it. She’d hurt her best friend, and there was nothing to be said in her defence.

“I guess I was upset,” Lena muttered, “I guess I wasn’t over it after all. I thought,” she took a deep breath, “I thought two weeks apart to get my ducks in a row would be enough. I thought I could face her again after that.” Her voice broke a little, and she wiped her cheeks with the back of her sleeve. Something she hadn’t done in years, ever since Lillian had told her it was gross, childish and unbecoming of a Luthor lady. “I made a mistake, Sam. I fucked up. I fucked up so badly.”

She brought her trembling fingers up to her forehead, rubbing the space right above her eyebrows.

“I really, _really_ fucked up,” she whispered.

Sam had crossed her arms and was looking at Lena with great concern.

“Look, Lena, I’m not saying you don’t have the right to feel angry,” she tried to rationalise. “Your best friend is Supergirl, I get that that might be a bit of a shock,” she mumbled more to herself than to Lena. “I know she lied but – ”

“I’m not upset that she’s Supergirl,” Lena interrupted Sam.

“Also she – I’m sorry, what?” Sam looked absolutely flabbergasted.

“I don’t care that she’s Supergirl,” Lena repeated.

“Yeah, I – I heard y – wait, what?”

Lena almost laughed at the ridiculousness of it all. Of course Sam didn’t get it. Nobody got it. She hadn’t talked about it all. Everybody just understood that she was mad at Kara, and that was that. She would get over it; things would go back to normal.

But they couldn’t.

Because finding out that Kara Danvers was Supergirl meant that something fundamental had changed in Lena’s life.

“W-well, if you don’t care that she’s Supergirl,” Sam paused confused, “then why the hell are you giving her such a hard time? Why do you hate her?”

“I don’t – ” Lena sighed. “I don’t hate her. And I don’t care that she’s Supergirl. Because of course she is,” Lena said. “It makes perfect sense. Kara is the kindest person on earth; she would suffer to make a stranger happy. She has puppy dog eyes and big smiles and,” Lena almost cried happy tears at the memories that flooded her system, “she’s all of that, all those smiles and that bravery and that beauty and kindness personified, so of course, _of course,_ she’s also National City’s protector. Who else could be that perfect?” It was a rhetorical question, but Sam nodded nonetheless. “I don’t care about that. I really, really don’t,” Lena whispered.

Sam still looked confused. “Honey, if you don’t care that she’s an alien, or that she’s Supergirl… what is the problem?”

Lena took a deep shuddering breath. This was it. If she told Sam now, it would all become real. Every feeling, every tear, every memory would become reality. She’d tried so long to stomp the hurt down, would it really be okay to face it now?

Lena was usually a ‘share-and-bail’ person, as she liked to call it. The second she opened up to someone, she had the overwhelming urge to run away and to avoid all contact with said person. She wanted to blame it on her upbringing – everything in her family was ammo. Everything could be used against you as blackmail – but she couldn’t blame it all on that.

In truth, Lena was just scared. Opening up meant giving a part of herself to another person, and she wasn’t sure she could do that.

Sure, over the years she’d opened up to Sam, little by little. They’d gone through some rough things together, Sam’s pregnancy not the least of it. But talking about this… Lena already felt like she was on the brink of bursting out into tears. And after all the drama, the reveal, the death and murder of her brother, Kara’s mysterious illness… who could blame her?

“Lena?” Sam asked softly.

Lena realised she’d been panicking internally and had completely forgotten about her friend right next to her.

“Sorry,” Lena mumbled, but Sam just shook her head. She looked so worried. That was probably the mother in her, Lena mused.

“Please just tell me, Lena,” Sam whispered. “I want to understand. I want to help,” she pleaded, “but I can’t if you don’t tell me what Kara did to make you so angry.”

Lena nodded slowly.

“I want to tell you,” she started slowly, “but I don’t know how to.” Seeing Sam’s confused expression, she elaborated: “I don’t know if I can actually put it into words. It’s,” she paused, “hard.”

Sam nodded emphatically. “Okay,” she whispered, “I get that.” She took Lena’s hand into her own, and Lena resisted the urge to shake it off and run away. She forced herself to stay put. “Just try anyway,” Sam said with kind eyes, “I’ll listen, and I’ll try to understand, okay?”

Lena nodded.

“I’m,” God damnit, was she tearing up already? There was a lump in her throat and she could feel herself trembling. She took a deep breath and started over.

“I’m not mad that she’s Supergirl. In fact,” she looked up trying to blink her tears away, “in fact it could only make me love her more. There is only one person on this entire planet kind and sweet enough to risk her life time and time again, defending even the most horrid people amongst us.”

Sam nodded.

“Therefor, I feel awful for feeling bad about… it all being a lie,” she whispered. “All of it, these three years since I’ve met her, have been one big lie.”

“What do you mean?” Sam asked softly, and Lena let out a sad laugh.

“It means,” she swallowed her tears, “that when I met Kara, I was over the moon.” She let out a short laugh at the memory of bumbling not-reporter Kara in her pretty dress, trying not to choke on her own words in nervousness. “She was so,” she paused, thinking, “wonderful. So absolutely wonderfully perfect. Straight out of a fairy-tale, I thought back then.”

Sam smiled back at her, but she still looked unsure about where this was going.

“I couldn’t stay away, you know?” Lena told Sam with a smile. “No matter how bad of an idea I thought it was, I couldn’t stay away. I couldn’t stop myself from looking up her address and asking her to go to parties with me, or to help me with something or other.”

She sighed, and looked at Sam.

“And she didn’t mind, Sam.” Lena whispered. “In fact, she seemed just as happy as me to meet up and have lunch. Even though,” Lena felt some tears slide down her cheeks, having rudely escaped Lena’s harsh demeanour. “Even though she already had so many friends who loved her and wanted to see her, she didn’t mind befriending me. She supported me, she – ” her voice cracked. “She believed in me, Sam. She asked me out to lunch. She asked me for help with articles. And her friends,” she laughed, but it sounded hollow in her ears, “her friends didn’t trust me back then. Which was understandable, of course, but still. It hurt. But it never deterred her,” Lena whispered, “she never let that stop her from meeting up with me. She believed in me,” she repeated.

Lena shook her head, wiping her tears away, trying to regain some of her usual confidence.

“Maybe it’s because I have some major parental approval issues,” she said, “but her approval and support meant everything to me. When I took over L-Corp, I had to tell myself and everybody around me that I was trying to turn L-Corp into a force for good, but even I didn’t really believe it.”

Sam frowned. “But you said – ”

Lena held up her palms in defeat. “I know what I said. I told every reporter willing to listen that I was excited about L-Corp’s position as a positive change in National City’s daily life. But come on,” she levelled with Sam, “I knew people weren’t going to trust a Luthor.”

She scoffed.

“Why would they? All my family’s ever done is destroy good things.”

“Lena you can’t – ”

“I’m not trying to turn this into a pity party for myself, I swear,” she promised, “I’m just trying to explain to you – I’m trying to explain what she means to me.”

Why was this so damn hard?

“Kara came into my life, loving, and open and so positive,” Lena said, her eyes flickering. “She was the first to whole-heartedly believe in me. First she wrote that amazing piece on me for CatCo, and then she just… didn’t stop.”

She looked at Sam, and found that the other woman was smiling.

“No, Sam I mean it!” Lena said, but she smiled too. “It was like I could do no wrong. She assured me that L-Corp would thrive under me, and she… she made me believe that maybe I could be better too. Better than the last name I was given when I was adopted.” The last part came out as a whisper. Like it was a secret. A dark deep secret.

Sam’s hand found Lena’s, and she looked up to find that she’d drifted off into her own memories.

“You are better than them, Lena, you know that,” Sam said softly.

Lena scraped her throat uncomfortably. “Yeah,” she said hoarsely, “I do – or,” she frowned again, “I did.”

She took a deep breath again.

“I thought that if someone as sweet and pure and perfect as Kara could believe in me, than I could do it too. And I started to. With every meeting, every conviction Kara had about my being a good person; it started working.”

She looked at Sam with wonder in her eyes.

“I started believing too. I worked harder, I spent more time around people, and I learned not to always expect the worst. I accompanied Kara to events; the media spotted me doing more mundane stuff like shopping and the like – all with Kara, of course. I started doing the stuff I used to like, like,” she waved her hand trying to find an example, “like repairing cars. And you know what, Sam?”

Sam shook her head.

Lena smiled. “I found that, people didn’t look at me the way they used to anymore. Because of Kara. Because I changed, all thanks to her,” she smiled. “They weren’t scared of me anymore, Sam. They wanted to meet me. They wanted to hear about my latest inventions, and they wanted me to speak about what I was doing, what I was creating, without referring to my family. I was my own woman, Sam. I became someone the world could be proud of.”

Sam smiled.

“And it was all thanks to Kara. She did all that. She changed my life. She changed everything. And then…”

Lena fell silent.

“Then what?” Sam asked. “That didn’t go away because she was Supergirl, did it?”

Lena choked out a laugh. It sounded more like a sob.

“But it did, Sam,” she whispered. “Because you see, Kara being Supergirl meant that she had to protect the public. She had to make sure that there were no threats to National City or its citizens. She carries an enormous burden, you know? Every decision she makes, affects the lives of millions of people. If she puts her trust in the wrong person, people could suffer. If she didn’t check up on people who might form a threat to society, she might miss the presence of an upcoming disaster. Do you get it?”

Sam shook her head. “I’m still confused, Lena. What does that have to do with you?”

“I’m the possible threat, Sam!” Lena all but yelled. “I’m the person who nobody can trust. I’m a Luthor,” her shoulders dropped. “I’m a Luthor, and I’ll always be one.”

“Lena – ”

“And I don’t blame her!” Lena said, her voice taking on a slightly hysterical tone. “I don’t blame her for doing what she did, that’s the worst part! She had to do it. She had to make sure people were safe. She had to.”

“She had to do what, Lena?”

Lena wrapped her arms around herself. This was too hard. It hurt too badly.

“To make sure that I did have good intentions,” Lena said, trying to sound as calm as she could, “to make sure I wasn’t my family, she had to keep an eye on me, one way or another. And I gave her the perfect opportunity. I literally begged her for it, really,” she laughed self-depreciatively. “I wanted to be her friend so badly. And I presented her with the best way to check up on me.”

“Lena, you can’t possibly think that Kara – ” Sam interrupted with a frown.

“It wasn’t mean-spirited, Sam,” Lena countered defensively, “she just had to know what I was up to. I’m not upset about that. It was her duty to the city. She pretended to be my friend to make sure I wasn’t going to nuke the city, or something.”

Truthfully, Lena didn’t much care what Kara was afraid she was planning. With her family’s history, she was sure it was all very much justified. What really hurt… what really cut the deepest –

“But you know what it means, Sam?” Lena asked not expecting an answer, “It means that all of it, literally all of it,” she could feel herself start to cry, but she rejected Sam’s outstretched arms by stepping away, “all of it was fake.”

She said it. She said it.

The truth was out and she couldn’t swallow it again.

“All the hugs, all the promises, God, Sam, all of her confident declarations that I was a good person who could help people,” she covered her mouth to stifle a sob. “It was all fake. She was trying to abate me. To keep me quiet and content, and I relished in it,” she admitted. “I was so starved for love, that I stopped using my brain. I didn’t think, I didn’t consider that she was appeasing me, trying to make sure I wouldn’t cause any trouble.”

Sam shook her head, but Lena ignored her.

“I used to be so rational, Sam. I used to overthink everything, every decision. But then I met Kara,” she smiled through her tears. “I met Kara and I stopped thinking. I became slow and careless, just like my mother always said,” she added bitterly. “I was so desperate for someone to tell me I was doing a good job that I just soaked up the compliments and shut off the part of my brain that questioned the intentions behind them. Because in the end,” she choked on the word.

Lena had to wipe her face with both her hands to wipe the tears away.

“In the end, every compliment, every hug, every smile, it was all fake.”

“How could you possibly know that, Lena?” Sam asked softly, but she seemed just as affected as Lena. The latter even thought she could see some tears in the corners of Sam’s eyes.

“Because,” Lena said, and she felt her heart grow colder at the memory, “the second, my credibility was even the slightest bit in doubt, she turned on me. Not as Kara,” she added, “no, that would be throwing away the perfect cover. No,” she shook her head, eyes staring unblinkingly at the wall in front of her, completely bypassing Sam, “when she thought I was trying to make something that could possibly, hypothetically hurt her, she told me,” she whispered.

Lena swallowed the lump in her throat.

“She told me in so many words that she couldn’t trust me, because I was just like my family,” she whispered self-depreciatively.

“Lena…”

“That’s how I know, Sam,” Lena said, “that’s how I know she was keeping me on a short leash. She never fully trusted me in the first place. And the worst part is I don’t even mind that.” Lena was trembling now, stuck in her own thoughts. “I don’t mind that she didn’t trust me. That she never had in the first place. Because she had to. She was protecting everyone in National City. She befriended me, not because she had to, but because it was the right thing to do.”

“Then what is it?” Sam asked, almost desperately. “If all of that didn’t make you angry, then what did?”

Lena smiled sadly.

“What hurt me, was that I was so stupid,” Lena whispered. “I was stupid enough to believe that someone – anyone – could actually think I was anything more than the family I grew up in.”

Her eyes turned to Sam, and her voice took on a pleading edge that made Sam want to hug Lena close and never let go.

“I was stupid enough to believe that I was doing good. That I could be different. That people could look at me, and actually see something else than the horrors my brother and mother inflicted on so many innocent people and creatures.”

Sam clenched her fists, in a way that made Lena think she might be restraining herself from actually taking Lena in her arms.

“All the changes,” Lena whispered, “all these people I thought regarded me differently after I’d met Kara,” she shook her head. “It was all fake, Sam,” her voice cracked. “I was never going to be a good person. I was delusional. I was playing make-belief like a _child_. I never had a chance, Sam, I- I’m nothing. The second I do something wrong, people remember exactly what kind of a monster I am. When they find out Supergirl and I had a fallout, they’ll remember that I’m just like them, that I – ”

Lena started crying in earnest now. Hot tears streamed down her face at the realisation that everything she’d kept inside was making its way out of her body. She couldn’t contain the loud sobs that wrecked her body, and if this were any other time, she would feel so _embarrassed_ because she was crying in a freaking hospital. But right now, she couldn’t stop.

Suddenly, two strong arms enveloped Lena in the second-warmest hug she’d ever gotten in her life. The comforting smell of Sam was everywhere, and Lena soaked her blazer with all the tears she had.

“How could I be so stupid, Sam?” she cried “How?”

“You are not stupid.” Sam said sternly, tightening her hold. “You hear me, Lena Luthor? You are not stupid, and you are not a monster.”

She took a step back, still holding Lena’s arms.

“You are not your family, and deep down, even you know that. You don’t want to hurt people, you don’t – ”

“I hurt Kara.” Lena cut her off. “I hurt Kara, because I couldn’t deal with the embarrassment of my own personal shortcomings.”

She was disgusted with herself.

“How is that not the Luthor way?”

Sam shook her head.

“You were hurt, Lena.” Sam said calmly. “You were hurt, and you acted out. I know you like to work with boxes,” Sam raised an eyebrow, indicating just how little she approved of that method, “but like I told you a million times over, that’s only going to come back to bite you in the ass.”

Lena laughed softly, and wiped her eyes. Sam smiled back at her.

“You were blasted with all these different emotions, and you didn’t know how to deal with them. You drank alcohol, you let some time pass, and you assumed you could push it all back down.”

“But I couldn’t,” Lena whispered.

“But you couldn’t,” Sam agreed. “You aimed all your emotions at the one person you could, and that was Kara.”

Lena hung her head in shame.

“You made a mistake, and if Kara were just your friend, that mistake wouldn’t have too many consequences. But what you did, Lena, and I’m saying this as kindly as I can,”

Lena flinched.

But Sam didn’t pull any punches. “What you did was a gross abuse of power, and you should’ve known better than to go to CatCo again, the second you realised you were hurting her on a professional level.”

Sam’s strict stare could make a school teacher blush, and even Lena who usually stared down her enemies in boardrooms and life-threatening battles, had a hard time trying not to look away.

“Your anger made you blind to the things happening around you. The Lena I know would never threaten an employee’s job over such petty things. You’ll be lucky if Kara doesn’t press any charges. And lastly – ”

Lena knew Sam was right, of course, but it still hurt. She instinctively bowed her head, trying to escape the upcoming truth-bomb that would inevitably hurt her.

“It’s understandable.”

 _Understandable_.

Lena had to process that for a couple of second. She initially thought she’d misheard Sam. She blinked a couple of times before looking back up at Sam in confusion.

“Did you just say…?”

Sam sighed. “You’re human, Lena. Even if you want to pretend you’re actually some cool feeling-less humanoid, you are very much human. You made a mistake. You fucked up. But you were hurt, and I understand.”

Lena nodded slowly.

“So why can’t you consider that maybe Kara made a mistake too?”

Lena paused. “What?” she asked.

Sam shook her head, and mumbled something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like ‘and she thinks she’s so smart’.

“Look,” Sam deadpanned, “you have this insane notion that Kara had this mastermind plan to control your life to keep tabs on you.”

Lena nodded self-consciously. _Well when you put it like that it sounds insane._

“Have you actually met that girl, Lena?” Sam asked, growing impatient. “You say she’s some sort of spy-genius, when I have seen her try and eat three pizza’s stacked on top of one another to win an eating contest with James.” She held up her hands. “Call me crazy, but that just does not scream evil mastermind to me.”

Lena laughed. That had been one hilarious evening. How James thought he could ever out-do Kara when it came to eating – pizza nonetheless – was still a mystery to her.

“I’ve seen how you and Kara interact, Lena,” Sam added softly, “and that girl loves you. She loves you with all her heart.” Lena shook her head; she didn’t want to believe in pretty little lies anymore. “Listen to me, Lena,” Sam said sternly, “that girl lets you win at board-games because she wants to keep you around. She saved deserts for you – something she doesn’t do for anyone, according to Alex.”

Lena didn’t want to hope. She couldn’t.

“Alex also told me Kara spent more than half her budget on a dress for one of your parties, because she was terrified she would embarrass you if she arrived in one of her old dresses, did you know that?” Sam looked at Lena intently. “She didn’t have to do that. In fact, a lot of people – reasonable people, reasonable friends – wouldn’t do that. She went out of her way for you because she loves you, Lena. She does these things with love.”

Lena looked at the floor, clutching one of her fists against her chest. Could it be – no. It all hurt too much, and it was too confusing. Lena couldn’t think, she couldn’t rationalise anything anymore. But Sam had planted a seed of doubt in Lena, who couldn’t stop herself from hoping that maybe, just _maybe_ , Sam was right.

“All I’m saying here, Lena,” Sam continued softly, “is that you should give Kara the benefit of the doubt. You don’t know her side of the story until you actually talk to her.”

The reality of the situation suddenly came rushing back, and Lena could feel herself start to panic again.

“How can I do that,” she whispered hysterically, “when Kara could be dying because of my negligence? What if – ”

“Okay,” Sam grabbed Lena’s shoulders again. “First of all, stop freaking out, it’s not good for your skin. Second,” her tone became more serious again, “while you and Alex were having your little chat,” she used airquotes for the last word, and Lena couldn’t help but smile, “I talked to the nurse some more. Turns out she could find a lot more information when she wasn’t being yelled at.”

Lena nodded. “Yeah, Alex is weirdly terrifying,” she mused.

Sam nodded, and smiled looking at the floor. “Yeah,” she whispered, “she really is.”

Lena frowned. She made a mental note to ask Sam about Alex later.

Sam shook her head, focussing again. “What I mean to say is, they’re just rushing Kara through some tests. They’ll tell us more when they have the results.”

Lena let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding.

“Really?” she almost started crying again. Her face must look more like a panda right about now. Not a good look.

“Really,” Sam nodded. “She has a fever,” she continued gently, “she wasn’t shot by some sort of mysterious weapon, okay? She’s not dying. She’s just sick.”

Lena nodded. “Right.”

“You’re going to have to apologise to Kara,” Sam said, “but I am convinced things will be alright. I promise.”

“But how, I – ” she swallowed a lump in her throat. “What if she doesn’t want to talk to me again after she wakes up?” she asked anxiously.

“Lena,” Sam deadpanned. “I’ve seen the way that girl looks at you. No way will she ever refuse to see you, believe me.”

Lena nodded slowly, still not completely convinced.

“So what do I do?” she whispered.

“Well,” Sam said producing a wet wipe from her purse, “first you’re going to make yourself look presentable, because, honestly, you in panic mode is not a reassuring sight.”

Lena laughed and gratefully accepted the wet wipe.

“Then, we’re going to re-join the group, and we’re going to wait for the doctor to come out and tell us what’s wrong with Kara. Understood?”

Lena swallowed her nervousness and nodded. She wiped the mascara stains from her cheeks, and threw the used wipe away.

“Okay,” she said. “Let’s go and wait for Kara to wake up.”

Sam smiled. “Okay.”

She took Lena’s hand, and together, they walked back to the waiting area, where the others awaited.

* * *

Ruby was sat half on her chair, half on Alex’s lap, her face red from crying. Alex held the girl in an iron hold, allowing her to bury her face in the nook of Alex’s neck. Alex didn’t look much better. Her lips were pressed tightly together, and her jaw was clenched, like she was trying very hard to keep it together.

Nia was still sniffling, but Brainy held her hands in his, and was murmuring sweet things in her ear in an effort to make her feel better. James sat slouched in his chair, looking at the floor, his hands holding his head. He looked so lost. Kelly sat next to Alex and Ruby, rubbing Alex’s arm in a comforting manner from time to time.

They looked so much like a tightly knit family that Lena wanted to turn around and run away. These people didn’t want her here. They blamed her for what happened, and rightly so. They didn’t want to talk to her.

She looked over her shoulder, but Sam caught her eye, and raised an eyebrow. She obviously knew what was going on in Lena’s brain.

Lena both loathed and loved that woman for knowing her so well.

“Relax,” Sam mouthed, and Lena nodded almost imperceptibly.

Kelly was the first to notice her.

“Hey Lena,” she smiled tiredly, “care to join us?”

The moment the words had left her mouth, six heads snapped up, and Lena regretted not having run away while she still could instantly.

For a brief moment, everybody just stared at one another. Then Ruby piped up. “Can you come sit next to me, aunty Lena?” she asked.

Alex actually looked a little offended that Ruby would seek comfort from anybody else, but when Ruby tightened her hold around Alex’s waist a bit more, she relented.

With an over-exaggerated eye roll, she glared at the chair next them, and then to Lena. She raised her eyebrows as if to say, “well?”

From the corner of her eye, Lena was pretty sure she could see Sam smirk. It kind of made her want to roll her eyes too. But Lena wasn’t going to pass on this opportunity.

She slid into the chair next to Ruby, and sighed. When she turned to look at the younger girl, she saw Ruby look at her with a sad smile, and Lena’s heart all but broke. She reached out her hand and rubbed Ruby’s arm softly. The younger girl smiled a bit wider, before letting her head drop back to where it was laying on Alex’s chest before. Sam took a seat next to her, and Lena quietly overheard her introduce herself to Nia.

She leaned back in the chair, and watched as the nurses and doctors passed them by, unaware of how scared all of them were.

Lena crossed her arms in front of her chest.

All they could do now, was wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed this lengthy update (almost 15,000 words!) It took me a while to write it. 
> 
> As always, feel free to let me know what you think, either on here or on my Tumblr:  
> https://thingsanddreamsandstuff.tumblr.com
> 
> Lots of love!


	6. Chapter 6

They had been waiting for hours.

Hours!

Dozens of people had gotten admitted and discharged in the time that they’d been waiting there. Doctors and nurses had moved around rushing from one place to another, saving lives, doing paperwork, and God knows what else. Lena wished she could fast forward, and see all the people moving around at an accelerated speed, like in those little videos online.

God, why did she even own a hospital if it didn’t even let her prioritise the care of her dearest… friend (?) over any other patient? Realistically she knew she couldn’t do that, but emotionally… she felt like punching the doctors who came by to tell them “there weren’t any updates yet.”

Lena shifted uncomfortably in the hard plastic chair. Her butt had gone numb from sitting down for too long, and she was starting to get antsier with every passing minute.

It couldn’t be good.

It couldn’t be innocent.

If Kara had been with doctors for over four hours and twenty-three minutes, without any one of said doctors having the time to inform them, it meant that they were really busy patching her up. It couldn’t be good.

Lena looked at her watch again. She’d done so hundreds of times in these last hours, but she couldn’t help it. Her entire life was based on punctuality. A meeting at ten AM that could last exactly sixty-three minutes with two minutes for small talk and seven minutes for calculated interruptions. Then a short two minute break for her assistant to get her a coffee and inform her of current affairs of the day, before another meeting was meant to start.

Lena’s life centred round time. It was her lifeline. It controlled everything she did, and everywhere she went. It went by too fast, so that she was still working at eleven at night, when all of L-Corp was empty. It went by too fast when she was having fun with Kara, wishing the game nights and spontaneous lunches and visits never ended.

She glanced at her watch and –

“Can you please stop that?”

Alex’s voice was sharp and irritated, and it snapped Lena out of her reveries.

“Stop what?” she asked innocently.

“Stop checking the time every ten seconds,” Alex gritted out. “It’s driving me insane.”

Lena rolled her eyes, but lowered her wrist. Whatever.

She glanced at Ruby, still lying on Alex’s chest. The girl had fallen asleep about an hour ago, the emotional turmoil having tired her out. Lena’s eyes softened, and she stared back ahead. Alex was loosely holding her with one arm, the other held up a folded magazine she was intensely focussed on.

But Lena knew it was all pretence.

Alex was wound just as tight as she was, terrified about what was about to happen, or what was happening at that very moment. She was probably just as eager as Lena to just drop into the doctors’ quarters and demand answers. But she didn’t move. She just read her stupid article in her stupid magazine.

Lena wanted to go yell at the doctors. She wanted to stand up, run to operating rooms, and go look for Kara herself. She wanted to scream at those doctors, threaten them, maybe, just to get some sort of reaction. She wanted answers, and she wasn’t above using her Luthor name to get them. She wanted to scare them into telling her everything they knew. She wanted to know whether Kara was alright, whether she was still unconscious, whether she had to undergo surgery or not. It was driving her insane.

But seeing Ruby’s tired face always pulled her right back into reality.

She couldn’t scream. She couldn’t yell. Because Ruby would wake up, and she would be so scared, and God know that poor girl didn’t deserve to be scared any more in this lifetime.

Lena sighed deeply and leaned back in the chair. From the corner of her eye, she could see Alex’s knuckles tighten around the magazine. She frowned and closed her eyes.

This was going to take forever.

She should be at L-Corp or CatCo right now. Hundreds of employees were counting on her to make sure the companies survived another financial quarter. All those people relied on her to make sure they had a steady income to put food on the table and provide for their families. She was supposed to be there; a calming presence, seemingly in perfect control of what happened. Someone to trust, like some sort of higher power.

But Lena wasn’t there to make sure those people were going to be fine. She was in her own fucking hospital, waiting for a girl who was playing the human equivalent of Schrodinger’s cat. As long as no doctor came into the room, she was both sick and healthy. Alive and dead.

Lena was selfish. She needed to be her. In the hours she wasted away in the hospital, all she could focus on was Kara. Her companies could have burned to the ground, suffered multiple terrorist attacks, taken over by her mother who was planning to destroy whoever had crossed her this time, and Lena still wouldn’t have left her uncomfortable plastic chair.

Because Kara needed her.

Or, maybe it was the other way around.

She needed Kara. She needed to know that her (former?) friend was okay. She needed to know that she did everything she could to make sure that Kara would get to go home after all this. That she could walk into Eliza’s arms after everything was over. That she could eat her chocolate pecan pie, and laugh while watching Friends reruns, and complain about Snapper’s outbursts and Alex’s food stealing habits. She needed to know that Kara Danvers could go back to being Kara Danvers again after all this was over.

God, that was depressing.

Lena sighed again.

“Could you stop that?” Alex snapped.

Lena opened her eyes and turned to look at Alex.

“Stop what?” she asked confused, and slightly irritated.

Alex was stressed out, she got that. Alex was scared, Lena understood. But Alex wasn’t the only one freaking out right now. She wasn’t the only one who had something to lose in that moment. They’d _both_ been waiting in this fucking awful place for the last four hours, so Lena was feeling just slightly too pissed off to let Alex use her as a punching bag.

“Stop breathing so obnoxiously loud,” Alex said through gritted teeth.

“I’m sorry,” Lena deadpanned, “you want me to stop _breathing_?”

There was a glint in Alex’s eyes that looked far too hopeful for Lena’s tastes.

“Well,” the agent countered, a sour smile on her face, “if it’s not too much trouble.”

Lena rolled her eyes.

“And stop doing that too!”

“Do what?” Lena snapped. “Fucking move? Fucking roll my eyes? Blink? What?”

“Yes!” Alex yelled, sitting up straighter to yell at Lena, which in turn woke up Ruby, who shot up straight, and looked around wildly. “Yes to all of those things! Stop acting so unbearably annoying!”

“You guys,” Ruby mumbled, but Lena and Alex ignored her. They only had eyes for each other.

“Look, I get that you’ve got this giant stick up your ass, but you’re not the only one who’s worried right now, okay?”

Lena gestured around.

“We’re all worried too! You don’t see us freaking out over people blinking!”

“It wasn’t the blinking!” Alex countered angrily.

“Oh, really,” Lena deadpanned, before rolling her eyes over-exaggeratedly, inwardly cheering when Alex’s face turned red.

Ruby looked worriedly between the two powerhouses. “Auntie Alex, auntie Le – ”

“You know what, Alex?” Lena cut off Ruby. She was really fucking angry now. “If my breathing bothers you so much, why don’t you just go sit somewhere else?”

Alex’s chest puffed up, and her eyes started bulging in a way that Winn once described as ‘super-villain-Alex-approaching-Armageddon’ mode.

“Why are you even here, Luthor?”

Alex stood up, and Ruby slipped from her lap, and ran back to Sam, back to safety.

“We get it, you want to make sure nobody sues the fuck out of your company,” Alex mocked, “but the truth is, no one wants you here!”

“Alex,” Sam commended softly, but both women ignored her.

“You’re not her friend,” Alex spat out in disgust, “you’re nothing more than her horrible, fucking boss, who couldn’t give her a break until she. Fucking. Fainted,” Alex finished, enunciating every last word. “Not even Cat Grant did that.”

That hit just a little too close to home for Lena, and she clenched her jaw. Alex smirked when she saw it, but Lena could find no mirth in her eyes. There was more to this situation than Alex cared to show. This verbal show-off was something Alex desperately needed. She needed a win. She needed a scapegoat.

And then it clicked.

Lena knew how to counterattack again.

“That’s pretty rich coming from you,” she stated calmly.

Alex frowned. “What do you mean?”

Lena sneered. “You were with Kara at the height of her disease, weren’t you?”

Alex shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other, and Lena smiled coldly. She always knew how to win.

“You couldn’t tell that your own sister was sick, that she was needy, that she was burning up. You’re her sister,” Lena said in mock disbelief, “yet you couldn’t tell that she was sick enough to land in a hospital?”

Lena shook her head emphatically.

“God, and to think you’re the one she trusts the most.”

Lena tilted her head.

“It’s like you said,” she said with innocent eyes, “I’m just her boss. I’m nothing to her. I couldn’t have noticed.” Her expression morphed into a cold sneer. “But you, as her sister, as her friend,” she tutted, “you didn’t know anything.”

“That’s enough!” Sam stood up now too, hands up, trying to diffuse the tension, but it was to no use.

Lena stood up now too. “You can’t live with the fact that you let your own sister down, so you’re trying to put it all on me, but I won’t fucking stand for it,” she yelled pointing at Alex.

“You fucking bitch!” Alex yelled, but tears shone in her eyes. “You don’t know anything about this!”

“Alright, okay!” Kelly got involved now too, and started to hold Alex back, who tensed up when she felt the other woman’s arms around her.

Sam’s hand found its place on Lena’s shoulder, and clenched hard.

“I. Will not! Be your fucking scapegoat,” Lena whispered angrily. To her shock, she herself felt tears on her cheeks, and she angrily wiped them away. “I have just as much right to be here! I need to fix this shit!”

“You can’t fix anything!” Alex yelled out, her voice cracking. “My sister is in the hospital, and all you care about is clearing your conscience!”

Lena actually recoiled. “That is not true! I’m here to make sure that Kara’s okay! I am trying, okay?”

“No it’s not! It’s not okay!” Alex yelled back. “You’re nothing more than a self-centred, arrogant, controlling cu – ”

“Excuse me?”

Seven heads whipped back to see a doctor in a white lab-coat and glasses and a chart in his hands regard them all nervously.

“I don’t mean to interrupt, I’m looking for Miss Danvers’ family?”

That one sentence seemed to create one big suction machine that somehow soaked up all the tension in the room. Pairs of shoulders sagged, and aggressive and defensive statures were replaced with hesitant, uncertain positions.

They were getting the information now.

Alex ran a hand through her short hair. Sam, Lena and the others soon joined her, and together they braced themselves for whatever came next.

“That would be us,” Alex confirmed. “We’re the family.”

The doctor nodded. “I’ve got her test results.”

* * *

“The truth is, I’ve never actually seen anything like this,” the doctor explained, once they’d all gathered around him. “Miss Danvers has sustained multiple infections that are supposed to be,” he paused, thinking, “well, truth be told, they’re supposed to be harmless.”

Alex crossed her arms in front of her chest. They were going to have a hard time explaining this.

“The moment we are born, even before that, our bodies create anti-bodies to combat viruses and illnesses around us, right?”

“I’m a doctor,” Alex responded dryly, “I do know about basic biology, thank you very much,” she huffed.

Ruby giggled behind her.

“W-well, then you know,” the doctor blurted out excitedly. “We’re dealing with a medical mystery here!”

His eyes gleamed at his own words.

“Miss Danvers’ body doesn’t seem to possess any of the antibodies humans have created throughout evolution to deal with various diseases. She’s contracted viruses that are supposed to have occurred in childhood!” His voice came out faster and faster the more he spoke.

Alex didn’t like his enthusiasm one bit.

“I think medical mystery might be a bit of an overstatement in this case,” she said, but the doctor ignored her.

“I can almost compare it to a human being kept in quarantine since birth!” he said excitedly. “As if she’s never come into contact with our polluted air and surroundings.”

He took the file in his hand and let his eyes flick down the pages and pages of information.

“I mean, look!”

He shoved the file under Alex’s nose.

“It’s like her body doesn’t even know what to do! It doesn’t know how to defend itself against these infections.”

Alex was quickly losing her patience. “But did you manage to contain the symptoms?” she implored. “Is her fever down? Is she okay?”

The doctor looked up, almost as if he’d forgotten about Kara as an actual person, and not just his medical puppet.

“W-wha- oh, the fever! Yes, yes,” he waved her concerns away impatiently, “we got all of that down. We gave her some antibiotics, some fluids, she’s fine now.”

Alex closed her eyes.

Kara was fine. She was okay. Her fever was down.

“Of course, we’re still going to run some tests, keep her here for some time, see how she reacts to various illnesses. You know, get to the bottom of things,” he concluded happily. “We could do trials, see what kind of antibodies her body creates over time in reaction to – ”

Alex narrowed her eyes as the doctor rambled on.

“That won’t be necessary,” she said. “She won’t be staying here any longer.”

Alex couldn’t say she didn’t feel especially gleeful when she saw the doctor look up in shock.

“Wait, what?” he asked.

She almost smirked.

No, she definitely didn’t feel bad. She loved wiping the stupid smile from his stupid face. She could recognise his type immediately. She’d encountered men like him in medical school en during her residencies. She knew exactly what kind of doctor he was. He was the kind who thrived on mysterious, painful diseases that hadn’t been discovered yet. He was the kind who was dying to find an expensive cure for a new disease, which would get him awards, glory and prestige. And money, of course.

Alex despised his type. Those kind of doctors didn’t care about patients, only about numbers. They didn’t care someone was suffering and dying, no, they only cared about numbers and statistics.

And Alex would be damned if she let her sister be reduced to nothing more than a number on a page.

She took her wallet from the pocket of her brown leather jacket and presented her F.B.I. badge to the doctor.

“Miss Danvers was taken here to intensive care only because she fainted,” Alex stated matter of factly. “Unfortunately, she’s of interest to the F.B.I. Meaning, that as soon as she’s ready for transport, she’ll be taken there for further testing.”

The doctor’s mouth fell open the longer he listened to Alex’s story.

“But you can’t do that!” he exclaimed. “Sh-she could help us better understand the human body!”

“The government says I can,” Alex said faux-innocently. “And since you just told me she’s fine, well,” Alex let her words linger and smiled. “There’s really nothing more you can do but give me her room number.”

* * *

Alex took a deep breath.

The nurses told her Kara had only just woken up, and since she was still recovering, it was best to limit the visit to one person at a time as not to upset her.

It had seemed only logical that she be the one to go. After all, she was Kara’s sister. But what did that really mean?

Alex was Kara’s sister, but she didn’t much feel like one right now. She’d ignored all of the signs that something was wrong with her, writing it off as sadness due to her and Lena’s friend break-up. Kara had been pale, and sweaty, and oh-so tired. She’d been complaining about a headache. She’d adjusted the thermostat in her apartment twice while Alex was there.

Alex was a doctor for crying out loud! How could she miss the tell-tale signs that Kara was getting sick? It was one thing to yell at Lena for not realising it sooner, it was another for a doctor – for her _sister_ who loved her so damn much – not to know.

Alex sighed and rubbed her forehead. This was such a mess. How could she ever apologise enough to Kara? How could she ever repay her for treating her so badly?

Suddenly a shiver went through her body.

What if her mother found out?

Oh dear God. Alex wanted to bang her head against the door. If Eliza Danvers found out that Kara was in the hospital because Alex had been too preoccupied with work and friends to realise that her only sister was contracting multiple illnesses, she would unleash hell on her.

“Hell hath no fury like a mother scorned,” Alex muttered to herself. “God, she’s going to kill me.”

But that didn’t matter now. Kara was still in the hospital. Alone, scared, and awake. She was probably panicking about the amount of work she was missing sitting there.

Kara.

Alex ran a hand through her short hair and took a deep breath. She could feel bad about herself later. Right now, Kara needed her, and she was there to help her.

She could do it. She could help.

Alex was too late, she should’ve helped sooner, she should’ve seen the signs. She should’ve been there for her sister when Lena was being so God awful to her. She should’ve been there to see the symptoms. She should’ve been there to force Kara to lie under the sunlamps. She should’ve been there to make sure that things wouldn’t have come this far, that Kara should never have fainted and that she should never have ended up here in the first place.

But there was no use dwelling on the ‘should haves’ and ‘could have beens’. She was here now. She was here to help her sister now.

So Alex raised her fist, and knocked on the door.

“Come in,” a thin voice called out softly.

Alex turned the knob and entered the hospital room.

At first, she almost missed Kara. The room was so white and Kara was so sickly pale that the younger Danvers almost completely blended into the décor.

Also, she was half buried under the thin hospital blanket.

“Kara?” Alex asked softly.

“Kara isn’t here,” Kara answered, her words muffled.

Alex cocked an eyebrow. “Really?” she asked. “How do you figure that?”

“The only Kara that’s here is the ‘please-don’t-yell-at-her Kara.’ And she’s only coming out when people aren’t going to yell at her for not telling people she was sick.”

Alex couldn’t help but smile at her sister’s antics. This was just typical.

“Alright, can I then speak with ‘please-don’t-yell-at-me Kara’?” Alex asked bemused.

It seemed like Kara could hear the smile in Alex’s voice, because she peaked out from under the blanket, and when she saw her sister standing there in the door opening, her face devoid from any of the ‘scary Danvers’ expressions, she lowered the blanket even more, until her entire face was uncovered. Kara smiled sheepishly.

“Hi there,” Alex said.

“Hey Alex,” Kara whispered.

“How are you doing?”

Kara shrugged. “Fine, I guess. Better than before.”

Alex nodded.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call you,” Kara blurted out suddenly. “And I’m sorry for not going to the sunlamps more. And I’m sorry for not telling you I got sick. And for going into Catco anyway, and f – ”

“Kara, Kara,” Alex cut off her sister’s rambling. “Please calm down.”

Alex saw that her sister still looked a little scared, her big blue eyes looking slightly suspicious at the calm tone of her voice. Alex closed the door behind her and walked over to Kara’s bed. Kara sat up straight, and hugged her knees, waiting for Alex’s inevitable rant.

“Look,” she said, her palms rose in a defenceless gesture, “I can’t say that I’m not upset, because I am.”

Kara shrunk a little when she heard those words.

“I was scared out of my mind today, thinking something bad happened to you, and that I wasn’t there to help you,” she said softly.

Kara looked down at her lap looking so terribly guilty that Alex took pity on her, and sat down in the bed, facing Kara.

“But right now,” Alex continued softly, grasping one of Kara’s pale hands in her own, “I’m just so glad you’re okay.”

Kara sniffled, and Alex could see she was trying hard not to cry.

“Come here,” Alex said, and opened her arms.

Kara dashed forward the best she could with her arm still attached to the IV and snuck into Alex’s arms, her head safely tucked under Alex’s chin, while her older sister wrapped her comforting arms around her.

“I’m so sorry,” she whimpered, before the tears suddenly fell from her face, and dampened Alex’s T-Shirt.

Alex shushed her, and drew Kara even closer, pulling her fully onto her lap. “It’s okay,” she whispered. “It’s okay.”

Alex slowly drew circles on Kara’s back, and let out a sigh of relief, just knowing that she had Kara back safely in her arms again. Her fingers threaded through her sister’s golden curls, sometimes getting stuck in one of the many knots and tangles that had accumulated that day. She let her face rest on Kara’s head and bunched Kara’s hospital gown in her fist, while the younger girl’s body cried silently.

The room was silent, except for Kara’s quiet sobs and the steady beep of Kara’s heart monitor, and Alex could almost appreciate it. For the first time in hours she felt at ease. For the first time in hours, she felt as if she was right where she was supposed to be. Like things were working out again.

Kara was safe. Kara was in her arms again. They were okay.

“You’re okay,” Alex whispered in Kara’s hair.

She didn’t know if she said it to reassure Kara or herself, but it seemed to help. Kara grew quieter, and her breathing seemed to even out more.

Eventually, Kara drew back, and Alex reluctantly let her go. Kara wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and looked at Alex with big red-rimmed eyes.

“I’m really sorry,” she whispered hoarsely.

Alex shook her head. “It’s me who should apologise,” Alex whispered, and Kara frowned in response.

“What do you mean?” she asked confused.

Alex sighed and took one of Kara’s hands into her own again. She stared down on her lap, and took a deep breath.

“There’s really no excuse for what I did, Kara,” she said softly. “I was so busy working at the D.E.O. and splitting my time between Kelly and Lena that I totally neglected you.” Kara opened her mouth to protest, but Alex didn’t let her. “I saw you,” she whispered, “remember?”

She looked up then, and Kara still looked pale and confused.

“I saw you in your apartment earlier this week,” Alex clarified. “I saw you look sick and tired, and I yelled at you.”

She whispered the last words, as if they were too painful and too horrible to ever be said aloud. Like it was a deep dark secret that had to be whispered in the dark instead of in a brightly lit hospital room. “I gave you such a hard time, and – ” Alex choked on the end of her sentence, and couldn’t get it out anymore.

She looked up when she felt Kara’s bony hand squeeze hers.

“Hey,” Kara whispered, “this wasn’t your fault, okay?”

Her bright blue eyes bore into Alex’s, and she looked so serious, and older beyond her years. Like all the years in the phantom zone had only just manifested themselves in her eyes.

“I couldn’t recognise the signs, but even I felt that something was wrong. I just didn’t want to tell you because I knew what you’d say, and then I wouldn’t – ”

Her sentence trailed off, but Alex knew what she was going to say.

“Because then you wouldn’t have been able to secure that interview for Lena,” she practically growled.

Kara closed her eyes and sighed. “Please, Alex, not right now. I know what you’re going t – ”

“Oh, I know what I’m going to say,” Alex said, standing up straight. “And I already told her.” Kara’s head snapped up. “I told her exactly what I thought of her.”

“Alex!” Kara groaned.

“No, no, Kara!” Alex said. “She literally worked you so hard you ended up in the freaking hospital! How the hell do you justify that?”

“She didn’t know!” Kara countered.

The heartbeat monitor beeped faster and louder, as if it were getting just as upset as Kara about the transpired events.

“I didn’t exactly tell her I was sick, Alex! It’s not her fault I fainted!”

“It’s her fault she created a toxic work atmosphere that made you feel like you couldn’t take a day off to rest!” Alex yelled.

Kara covered her face with her hands and groaned.

“I can’t believe you yelled at her, Alex!” she said once she’d brought her hands back down again. “She’s still upset about the you-know-what-secret!” Kara exclaimed as if it would clear everything up. “She has trust issues because of her family, so when I lied – ”

“Being a sad Luthor with trust issues doesn’t give her a get-out-of-jail card, Kara!” Alex yelled, walking around the room, trying to walk her anger off. “One day, she’s going to have to own up to all the shitty things she’s done in her life. I get that she’s not her brother, okay.”

Alex paced the room, facing the door.

“But the truth is, you don’t have to be a mass-murderer to just be a shitty person, and that’s exactly what – ”

Alex turned around and immediately shut up. Kara’s heart monitor was beeping faster than it should, and the girl it was attached too was starting to look worse for wear.

“Kara?” Alex immediately rushed over to her sister.

Kara was looking even paler than before, her eyes were clenched shut, and when Alex brought her hand to her forehead, she felt that the skin there was clammy and sweaty.

“Oh my God, Kara, are you okay?” Alex asked, quickly skimming her charts to see if there was anything wrong with her.

Kara shook her head but didn’t open her eyes. “Just a headache,” she whispered.

Alex instantly felt guilty. Kara wasn’t even out of her hospital bed yet, and she was already overwhelming her, and making her feel bad! If she kept this behaviour up she could compete with Lex Luthor over worst sibling of the year.

Alex sighed. “I’m sorry, Kara. I didn’t make to make you feel worse.”

The heart rate monitor slowed down, and with it, so did Alex’s heart.

“It’s fine, Alex,” Kara whispered. “I’m just… worried.”

Alex sat back down on the bed, leaning closer to Kara. “Worried about what?” she asked softly.

Kara looked around helplessly.

“I don’t know,” she said softly. “Everything?”

Alex’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion. “You’re going to have to be more specific.”

Kara blew the air out of her mouth.

“Like,” she trailed off, trying to put her thoughts into words. “I guess I’m worried about Lena firing me,” she started out carefully, not meeting Alex’s eyes.

Alex clenched her jaw, but forced herself not to go and knock Lena’s teeth out. Kara didn’t need that shit right now.

“Okay,” she said encouragingly, “what else?”

“Well,” Kara said, sitting up a little straighter, “I guess I’m also worried about my lack of powers, but,” she looked at her lap again, and pursed her lips, “I guess now we know why they’ve been gone so long.”

“Because you got sick,” Alex filled in.

Kara nodded. “Yeah.”

“Well, okay,” Alex said, perked up, “I’ve got good news then!”

Kara frowned. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah!” Alex exclaimed. “I’m getting you out of here! I got the all clear from your doc, and I’m driving you straight to the D.E.O. to get you,” she pushed her finger against Kara’s chest, “all the lighting boost your photosynthesising butt needs.”

Kara laughed a little, and Alex cheered a little on the inside. Seeing a smile break through on Kara’s face was always one of the best feelings in the world. The rosy cheeks, the dimples, all of it!

“Eliza said you can’t call me a plant anymore,” Kara mumbled, wiping away some stray tears, the smile still shining on her face.

“Well,” Alex replied nonchalantly, “she’s not here to kick my ass now, so I’m thinking I’ll get away with it.”

Kara rolled her eyes, but her grin matched Alex’s, so Alex figured it was okay.

“So,” she said, lifting her eyebrow, “wanna see how fast we can drive you through the hospital in a wheelchair?”

Kara laughed out loud, before said smile suddenly morphed into a frown, and Kara’s face fell.

“Hey, hey,” Alex scooted closer to Kara, baffled by the sudden change in demeanour. “What just happened, what’s wrong?”

“Alex,” Kara said, running a hand through her hair, “Alex, I don’t have insurance.”

She looked down on her lap.

“Oh my Rao. Alex,” she looked up at her sister, her eyes wild, “Alex, what am I going to do? I don’t have any sort of insurance and now I’ve undergone tests, stayed in a hospital bed, and they’re going to force me out in a wheelchair?”

Kara’s breaths came out faster and shallower, while her voice quickly grew more panicked.

“What if I have to pay thousands of dollars, Alex?” Kara looked at Alex with wide, scared eyes. “I don’t even have a thousand dollars to spare! What am I going to do?”

“Okay, okay,” Alex cut her sister off. “Don’t you worry about that, okay? I’ll fix it, don’t worry, please.”

Kara didn’t look reassured. “Rao, I always go to the D.E.O. and I am invulnerable! I shouldn’t have even ended up here, and now I’m going to be broke because of it, I can’t-”

Kara started to hyperventilate, and Alex quickly realised she had to intervene.

“Kara,” she said forcefully, taking her hands, “look at me and take a deep breath.”

Kara lifted her head to look at her sister, but her eyes were still unfocussed. “I’m going to be broke,” she whispered. “I’m going to have to take out loans, but they won’t let me because my credit is almost non-existent,” she rambled on.

“No, Kara, no,” Alex assured her. “You won’t be broke, and you won’t be taking out any loans because I am going to deal with this, you hear me?” she asked.

Kara nodded shakily, but didn’t look too convinced. “Okay,” she whispered.

“Okay,” Alex responded. “I’m going to take care of that right now. You stay here and rest up, okay? I’m coming back to take you home in a bit, alright?”

Kara nodded, and went to lie down on her side, still looking shaky and scared, and so, so worried.

Alex closed the door behind her, and vowed to fix this mess. Her sister was sick because she was over-worked, and over-stressed. The last thing she needed was to worry even more about something as stupid as hospital costs. So, Alex swore to pay off the whole thing, no matter the cost. She would not let her little sister be scared a minute longer than necessary.

Kara would be okay. She’d make sure of that.

* * *

“Hey,” Alex knocked on the nurse’s desk with her fist.

The nurse stopped typing on her computer, and looked up at Alex with an annoyed look on her face, until she recognised the woman from earlier. The look was quickly replaced with an expression Alex quickly recognised as fear.

“Please don’t yell at me again,” she whimpered. “I’m just doing my job.”

Okay, that did make Alex feel slightly guilty.

“Relax,” Alex said, “I’m not here to yell at you again.”

The woman visibly relaxed.

“I’m just here to check the bills for Kara Danvers? She’s being released, and I wanted to see what I can do in terms of payment,” she explained. “She’s only got some basic insurance provided by CatCo, but I need to know what costs aren’t covered?”

The nurse nodded, and typed Kara’s name into the computer. Her eyes quickly skimmed the page in front of her, and she suddenly looked confused.

“What?” Alex asked when she noticed the woman’s confusion. “Is something the matter? Are we talking in the thousands here? C’mon,” she pressed, “tell me what I’m dealing with here.”

“It’s- it’s nothing of the sort, really,” the nurse explained, still focussed on the screen in front of her. “It seems your sister’s bills have already been taken care of.”

She turned the screen towards Alex, and as the older woman leaned over the counter to read the webpage, she soon found the nurse to be correct. Under extravagant costs that made her stomach turn for procedures such as MRI tests, and head CT’s, as well as mind-boggling simple things such as a change of bedding, and the insertion of an IV with freaking fluids, Alex saw that the total cost amounted to… zero.

Absolutely nothing.

Kara’s total sum should’ve been in the high thousands, but instead, a round zero stared back at Alex.

Alex looked up at the nurse, who was looking just as confused as she was feeling. “How is that possible?” she asked.

The nurse shook her head, and turned the screen back towards her. “Well,” she said, clicking further on in Kara’s file, “it seems like someone anticipated that your sister would be in some medical trouble,” the nurse said, frowning as she read the webpage before her. “All of Miss Danvers’s hospital costs have been paid, and will be paid in future cases by one bank account. It seems that instead of insurance, Miss Danvers’s health file has been coupled to this one bank account. See here,” she let her finger catch on a sentence on the computer that Alex couldn’t read. “I can’t say when it was established, but I can say that it is unconditional. Costs of surgeries, medical examinations, vaccinations, hospital stays… pretty much everything is covered by this contract. Which means that your sister can walk away today, scot-free.”

She looked back up at Alex with a slight smile.

“It seems your sister has one amazing guardian angel, agent Danvers,” the woman said.

Alex let her eyes drift over the room, catching when she saw Lena tapping away on her phone with a frown.

“Yeah,” she said softly, “or one fairy tale godmother.”

* * *

“Hey guys,” Alex said approaching the group.

The words had barely left her mouth when Alex was almost jumped by her friends wanting to know about Kara.

“Is everything alright?”

“Is auntie Kara okay?”

“Are we permitted to step into her chambers or has she suffered one of the various earthly infections that could have nefarious consequences to our health?”

“Alex, is Kara okay?”

Alex held up her hands to stop the barrage of questions coming her way. Fortunately, the group quieted down fast, tensely awaiting any kind of news.

“Kara is fine,” Alex said, and a collective sight of relief escaped the gang. “She’s still a little tired and worn-out, but she’s looking forward to getting the hell out of here. So,” she turned to Brainy, “I’m going to take her to the D.E.O. to recharge, and I want you there to closely monitor any molecular changes.”

She gave him a stern look.

“I want Kara to be back to writing articles and fighting crime in no time, am I understood?”

“Perfectly, director Danvers,” Brainy said seriously, standing up straight and just barely refraining from saluting her on the spot.

Alex frowned but contained her almost instinctive eye-roll. She turned to face the group again. “Kara told me she’s been very stressed lately, in fact,” Alex shook her head, “she still is. She’s been under a lot of pressure lately.”

From the corner of her eye, she could see Lena duck her head, clearly uncomfortable with the situation.

“And honestly,” Alex continued, “I think we’ve all been a bit to blame.”

That got everybody’s attention. James frowned, Nia clutched her chest and looked at Alex with the saddest Bambi eyes she’d ever seen, and Kelly looked taken aback, even a little… hurt? And Lena… well, Lena just looked confused.

“I’m saying this as honestly as I possibly can,” Alex stopped to swallow the guilt that came up, “that we, all of us, haven’t been there for Kara these last few weeks.”

She scraped her throat.

“Me personally, I haven’t been there for her. I think I’ve seen her a total of two times these last few weeks, and I can take the blame for that. But let’s be honest,” she looked around the room, “ask yourself when was the last time you had dinner or lunch with Kara?”

She saw James’ mouth open.

“Or made time for Kara outside of work,” she deadpanned.

He closed his mouth.

“I mean, come on,” she looked around, “I know for a fact Kara’s always ready for me when I’m in trouble.”

Alex couldn’t even begin to count all the different occasions in which Kara had been there for her, be it fighting crime or helping her figure out what dress to wear to a D.E.O. party which would both make her look tough and sexy at the same time… Kara had helped her with Maggie, she’d saved her when she fell down the hiking trail and could’ve broken her leg. Kara had always been ready to save the day, always.

That’s why all of this was hitting her so hard, Alex mused. The one time she could have ever treated Kara as her human equal, the one time she could have provided Kara with some much-needed protection and love the most; Alex hadn’t been there.

But, as she looked around the room, she saw she wasn’t the only one who felt that way. Recalling the events from earlier on, Alex knew that Lena was feeling horrid. She wouldn’t be surprised if the girl dropped unconscious from all the nerve-wrecking stress and emotional turmoil she’d gone through in the last six hours. But even Nia and James looked guilty. If Alex had to guess, it would be that Nia felt embarrassed that she’d been spending all her free time with Brainy, and kind of forgot about Kara. James, well, objectively, Alex knew he’d been trying to get her to see a doctor, and she knew that he was suffering from Lena’s anger as well, but she still couldn’t help but feel at least irritated that he didn’t contact her directly, or made sure that Kara was okay outside of work.

Alex noticed her friends shifting uncomfortably in front of her, and she knew she hit a nerve. Trying to deflect the tension, she perked back up.

“That’s why I came up with this idea.”

The others looked back up at her. Alex licked her lips nervously.

“I was thinking, since Kara’s always there for us when we need her, maybe we should do something to show her we care, and that we’re, you know,” she gestured, “sorry for not being there for her, this time around. Like a little get together. With drinks. And food.”

She crossed her arms defensively.

“So what do you think?”

“Like a dinner party?” Kelly asked.

“Yeah, maybe,” Alex responded. “Maybe a little more informal? Just pizza and potstickers and maybe some games?”

“So like game-night?” Sam asked confused.

“No,” Alex said exasperated, dropping her shoulders, “you guys. This is serious. This isn’t just something we do all the time, okay?”

She looked at them expectantly.

“It has to be special. We have to show Kara we’re sorry for everything, and that we’re here for her. So it has to be a Kara themed get-together. It has to have everything that Kara loves, food-wise, and activity-wise. We’ll keep it low-key so she doesn’t overexert herself, and we’ll make it as comfortable and fun as possible. Can we do that?”

The others looked at each other and nodded. Sam turned to Alex and smiled.

“I think we can do it,” she said.

Alex smiled, relieved. “Okay. Then it’s settled. When Kara’s feeling better, we’re having a Kara party.”

“A Karty!” Ruby grinned.

Alex smiled and ruffled the girl’s long hair. “Exactly, kiddo, a Karty.” She turned to look at Brainy again.

“But let’s get her to the D.E.O. first, huh?”

Brainy nodded. “I’ll ask one of the assistant doctors for one of your peculiar wheely chairs,” he said solemnly.

Before Alex could even open her mouth, Nia jumped in. “And I’ll go with him so he doesn’t get transported to the psych ward,” she reassured Alex.

When they left, Sam and Ruby came up to Alex. “Listen,” Sam said apologetically, “I wish we could stay longer, but I really have to go. Ruby has try-outs for a new soccer team, and if we have any chance of actually being able to participate, we’ve gotta leave right now.”

“You guys are staying in National City?” Alex asked.

Sam blushed.

“Yeah,” she said, “Metropolis is fun and all that, but,” she smiled, “there are some thing National City has that Metropolis just lacks, you know?”

“Sure,” Alex said breathlessly, even though she didn’t know.

Sam laughed, and tucked some hair behind her ear.

“I’m really sorry for having to leave so abruptly,” she said.

“It’s okay, really,” Alex reassured her, “I’ll tell Kara you stopped by.”

“Okay,” Sam squeezed Alex’s hand, and with a swift kiss to her cheek and a smile, she and Ruby turned and left the building.

Alex raised her hand to her cheek, and found she was blushing a bit. _Well, look at that._

She didn’t have time to reflect on it longer though, because the Olsen siblings made their way over too. “Hey, babe,” Kelly said, “I really have to get going too. I have an appointment with a real-estate agent, and James is taking me.” Her beautiful soulful eyes looked right into Alex’s with so much empathy, that it made Alex’s stomach hurt in an unfamiliar way. “Are you going to be alright?”

“Oh sure, of course,” Alex said in a voice that was much higher than she would’ve ever liked to hear. “Kara’s fine, so I’ll just take her to – ”

“I was asking about you, Alex,” Kelly said softly. Alex shut her mouth in confusion. “I know Kara’s alright, and I’m so glad she is, but,” she took Alex’s hand into her own, and Alex couldn’t help but feel even more confused, for different reasons, “you need to take care of yourself too, Alex.” Kelly insisted. “This day has been very stressful for everyone, not least of all you. It wouldn’t be unfathomable for you to feel down about it,” she said. “So you make sure to call me if you want to talk about it, okay?”

Alex nodded dumbly.

“Okay,” Kelly smiled. She leaned in, one hand on Alex’s upper arm, and pressed her lips softly to Alex’s. “Bye,” she whispered.

“Bye,” Alex said dazedly.

Kelly giggled, and in a cloud of flowery perfume, she somehow let go of Alex and left the room, a grumbling James _– did I really need to see that, Kelly? –_ in her stride.

“Wow,” Alex whispered to no one in particular.

From the corner of her eye though, she could see Lena hurriedly pack her stuff, going so fast it seemed she was running away from someone instead of just leaving for the day.

“Lena,” Alex approached her.

Lena flinched, but relaxed once she saw Alex.

“Oh hey,” she said nonchalantly, still packing her purse like her life depended on it. “Since Kara’s fine, I thought it would be best for me to just head out now too.”

She stood up straight and put on her businesswoman front.

“Please let Kara know she can take as long as she wants to recover from this episode, and that she can pick up her work whenever she feels ready to do so.”

She turned back around and threw a bright red lipstick without the cap on in her purse.

Alex sighed, grumbled internally, and cursed every deity in the world for putting her in this situation, but she put on a smile. Putting her facts straight helped a little.

Lena had paid for Kara’s hospitalisation without telling anyone. Lena had been looking out for Kara when Alex couldn’t be reached at the D.E.O. Lena had personally made sure that Kara had been taken care of by the best doctors in her hospital. Lena had made sure Kara would never have to suffer crippling debts because of hospital bills. Lena had stayed because she wanted to know that Kara was alright, even though Alex had yelled at her and insulted her almost constantly.

Lena wasn’t altogether a horrible person.

“Hey Lena,” she tried. Lena hummed, still packing her stuff. “Why don’t you go tell her yourself, at the party,” Alex suggested.

Lena stiffened in front of her. She slowly stood up, and faced Alex. Her face was inscrutable.

“What?” she asked.

If it would still be becoming at her age, Alex would’ve stomped her foot. She hated being nice to people she didn’t like. She hated having to do this. But it was for Kara, she reminded herself. It was for Kara, and that’s why she just had to suck it up.

“Well,” Alex continued, still trying to sound as calm as possible, “I told everybody I would make sure everything Kara loved would be at the party.” She tilted her head. “That includes you.”

Lena cast her eyes down.

“I don’t think that would be wise,” she spoke softly. “I think it would be better for me not to interfere with Kara’s life for a while. I’ve done enough harm.”

She went back to packing her things, and Alex wanted to scream. Why was being a good person so freaking hard?

“Look Luthor,” Alex said in her normal voice, tired of using her sweet voice.

Lena looked up with a frown, clearly more accustomed to this voice than she was the other.

“I know you messed up. In fact, you really fucked up.”

Lena was quiet, and looked at the black leather bag on her lap. There were some red streaks on the inside now.

“But,” Alex conceded, “if you really want to make it up to her, you won’t run. She doesn’t like that,” Alex levelled, “not. At. All. So,” she went and sat down next to Lena. “If you want to apologise for real, you come to the party, you show Kara you still care, and you try and win back her forgiveness. That is the only way,” Alex asserted, “that things will work out between you two. But I can promise you that running will do the exact opposite.”

Lena was quiet for a while before she nodded, seemingly to herself. “Okay,” she whispered. She looked up at Alex. “Okay,” she said again, stronger.

Alex smiled. “Okay.”

Lena stood up, and smoothed down her dress. In her ever-so professional voice she said: “Text me the details to the party, and I’ll be there. Promise,” she added with a small smile.

“Alright then,” Alex said, inwardly cheering.

She’d done it. She’d secured the one thing on earth that could make Kara happier than pizza with potstickers on a game night. She brought Kara the possibility of her best friend back. That had to count for something.

Lena nodded to Alex once more, before she made her way to the exit of the building, where her driver was already waiting.

Alex heard some commotion coming from the nurse’s station, and she saw a nurse trying to restrain a doctor while Brainy was calmly trying to explain to him how his knowledge about the human body was actually primitive, and even laughable to him.

Alex sighed and stood up to walk over to the nurse’s station to help out a struggling Nia. Her life wouldn’t be her life if she didn’t constantly have to put out fires all over the place.

* * *

“I don’t get why I couldn’t talk to Vasquez a little longer,” Kara complained. “I haven’t seen her in ages, we could’ve stayed a little longer.”

They were currently on their way to Kara’s apartment, Kara leaning heavily on her sister while they walked the stairs, since she was still feeling pretty drained from the exhausting last few days she’d had.

“Relax,” Alex said rolling her eyes, “you can see her whenever you want, she’ll still be there tomorrow.”

Kara huffed. “Well I just don’t see why we’re in such a hurry to go home! It’s not like I left the stove on or something.”

“Can we just get a move on?” Alex asked. “You’re heavy!”

Kara gasped indignantly. “I am _not_ heavy!” she exclaimed.

“Sure, sure.”

Kara narrowed her eyes at Alex, but decided to let it go.

Finally, they reached Kara’s apartment, and Kara could honestly say she had never been happier to see her front door. After spending an entire night and half a day under the sunlamps – very uncomfortably, mind you – she couldn’t wait to dive back into her own bed, in her own sheets in her own cosy room.

She was home.

“Alright,” Alex said, settling Kara against the wall and fishing a key out of her bag. “Home sweet home.”

Kara smiled tiredly.

“Ready to get back to your normal non-hospitalised life?”

Kara moaned. “Ugh, like you wouldn’t believe.”

She stood up straight once she heard the key turn in the lock.

“Go on,” Alex said in a weird tone. She looked… excited? Or like she was in a weird zone between excitement and fear. Whatever she was feeling, Kara couldn’t decipher it.

Kara frowned at her, but shrugged off her weird behaviour. She figured it was just a result of all the sleep deprivation and stress Alex had suffered this weekend.

Kara stepped towards her apartment, turned the doorknob, and for a split second, while she was opening the door, she inwardly cursed herself for somehow leaving all the lights in her apartment on? Her electricity bill was going to be through the roof if she kept this up.

She opened the door wider, and was met with one of the most heart-warming scenes she’d ever witnessed – and that includes the four puppies dressed up as sharks waggling their tails at her on Main Street. All of her closest friends, everybody she loved so dearly, gathered on her couches and in her kitchen, preparing snacks and putting up the finishing touches to their – clearly home made – decorations. Her apartment was bathed in light and warmth, and she could smell delicious, mouth-wateringly good pizza, and potstickers! The mess she vaguely remembers leaving on Friday was gone, cleaned up. Kelly was putting out plates and glasses, while J’onn was filling wine glasses and Sam was busy baking something clearly amazing with Ruby in tow, both wearing Kara’s cute Disney themed aprons.

“She’s here, she’s here!” she heard someone call out, and then she was suddenly greeted with numerous: “Kara’s!” and “It’s so good to have you back’s.”

Kara was speechless.

She was absolutely flabbergasted.

“H-how…?”

She felt Alex press against her from behind, wrapping her arms around Kara’s middle.

“We wanted to surprise you,” Alex said, and Kara could hear the nervous smile in her voice. “We know we’ve been too busy lately, and we wanted to do something for you. To say we’re sorry.”

Kara turned around, and she saw Alex wrapping her arms around herself, clearly worried about how Kara was going to react.

“Alex,” she whispered, “Alex, this is too much! You didn’t need to do that, you,” she turned around to face the entire group. “You guys,” she said, “this is,” she shook her head in disbelief, “this is amazing. I love you all so much.” Kara got some awe’s in response, and smiled. “But you really did not need to do that,” she stressed, “you guys are amazing! But you don’t have anything to apologise for! Come on! I know you guys have busy lives! You all work so hard!”

She turned to James. “You are so busy leading CatCo everyday, and I know you can’t be everywhere at once, I don’t blame you for not having the time to see me!”

Kara noticed Sam. “And Sam,” she said adoringly, “I’m so glad to see you, and – oomph.”

Kara was hit with all the strength and love of an athletic thirteen year old, and was also nearly tackled to the ground.

“Ruby!”

“Auntie Kara!”

“Oh my God,” Kara swept the girl up in a hug. “I can’t believe you’re here, oh,” Kara felt herself tear up. “Ruby! I’ve missed you so much!”

“I missed you too!”

Kara let go, Ruby still half-clinging to her body. “You guys,” she said softly, “I just don’t know what to say.”

“Don’t say anything,” James suggested. “You’ve deserved this, okay?”

He came over and gave her a quick hug. “Don’t you worry about anything CatCo related right now, you hear me?” He whispered in her ear. “You just focus on getting better. Take all the time you need.”

They let go and Kara smiled gratefully up at him. Sometimes she forgot how easy it had been becoming friends with him that first year at CatCo. After their kiss, after their failed date, after Guardian… Everything had just become so much more complicated, even their friendship. But every time he shot her that toothy grin, she remembered, and she couldn’t help but smile back. Deep down, he was still her CatCo buddy. Her only one, now that Winn was gone. She missed the friend he used to be, even if he was still there, disguised as her boss.

“Hi there.”

The second Olsen sibling came up to her, and pulled her into a soft hug.

“Hi Kelly,” Kara said with a soft smile when they let go.

“I’m so glad you’re feeling better,” Kelly said genuinely. “You gave us all quite a scare.”

“I know, I know,” Kara bowed her head, “I really didn’t mean to.”

“Oh it’s alright!” Kelly quickly reassured her. “We’re all just so relieved to see that you’re okay.”

Kara smiled gratefully up at her. That woman really was a sweetheart.

“Kara Danvers!” The booming voice that rang through her apartment could only belong to one man.

Kelly stepped away from Kara, and J’onn J’onzz stepped into her line of sight instead.

“J’onn,” Kara said happily, but she quickly dropped her smile when she saw his very _un_ happy expression.

He took four big steps, and then he was right in front of her. He towered over her in a way that made Kara understand why he had once been hired as director of the D.E.O. He was incredibly intimidating. Or, he would be, if Kara didn’t know him well enough to know he was a big cuddly bear underneath his stern persona. Hence, why she bought him the ‘papa bear’ mug for father’s day. (She definitely caught him tearing up when she presented it to him, and to this day, she’d only seen him drink his coffee out of that mug. And the ‘space dad’ mug he got from Winn, but whatever, it wasn’t a competition.)

But all of that didn’t take away from the fact that J’onn was looking pretty scary right about now. He had a frown etched on his face, his arms were crossed over his chest in his previous director stance, and worst of all, he had a very disapproving glare in his eyes.

Kara gulped. That was never great.

One time, she and Alex had decided to throw a big secret party in the D.E.O. when J’onn was away on business, and he’d come home earlier than expected, and he’d had that very same disapproving glare in his eyes then.

Alex and her had been forced to clean up the entire D.E.O. by themselves without using her superpowers.

One other time, she’d tried to bake a cake for J’onn’s birthday, and she’d used the kitchen in his apartment to do it. Unfortunately, Kara kept forgetting she was really bad at baking. So that night, when J’onn and everybody else arrived at the apartment to celebrate his birthday, they came home to an explosion of egg whites, powdered sugar, and a big mess of sticky flower covering most of the walls and floor.

Kara had been banned from his apartment for over a month. And she was subsequently also banned from ever baking anyone a birthday cake ever again. Which she still found to be very unfair? It’s not like Alex had never made a dish explode in a kitchen, and did she get a life-long ban from the kitchen?

What she meant to say was; there were always bad consequences when J’onn looked at her that way. And right now, things were looking quite dreary for Kara.

“Okay,” she said, opting to go for the defence before J’onn got the chance to go into the offence. “I know you’re mad,” Kara acquiesced, “but, you really should look at it this way,” she opened her mouth to continue, but quickly faltered.

That was a bad start. She didn’t know how to look at it in a different way. And clearly, J’onn knew that too. If it was even possible, he looked even grimmer than before.

So Kara went over to her second tactic.

Cuteness.

Kara shot him an awkward toothy smile, hoping to assuage the man a bit. And it worked! Slightly. Kara was pretty sure she saw a hint of smile in his face when the side of his mouth went up with an almost imperceptibly small quirk. Though, it could’ve just been an extension of his frown.

Kara’s shoulders sagged. “Look,” she sighed, “J’onn, I’m really sorry, but I’m also kind of tired of having to apologise to every – oh!”

Kara was swept of her feet – literally! – when J’onn wordlessly wrapped her up in an uncharacteristically warm hug. He held her so tight Kara felt her arms go around his neck out of some self-preserving instinct. His strong arms held her so protectively, and he even swayed her around a bit. Kara instinctively closed her eyes. This quiet hug, so unlike all the other hugs she always got from Lena, Alex – even her mom, brought her so much well-needed comfort, she could almost cry again.

The hug felt familiar and unfamiliar. He smelled like J’onn. Like cologne, gunpowder and that distinct dad smell. She could only associate it with the way her own father had smelled, so she had just dubbed it ‘the dad smell.’ It made her feel small, and so, so protected.

“Don’t you ever,” J’onn mumbled against the top of her head, “don’t you ever, ever scare me like that again, you hear me?”

Kara fought against the prickling in her eyes and smiled a watery smile that J’onn couldn’t see.

“I’ve already lost two daughters,” he continued, “I’ll be damned if I lose another one.”

Kara hugged him tighter, and nodded against his shoulder, and he seemed to understand. But he didn’t let go. He didn’t let go for another good ten seconds.

When he finally did release her, Kara saw she wasn’t the only one affected by the hug. J’onn was looking anywhere but at her, and Kara spotted a blush in his cheeks. His voice was gruff and hoarse when he spoke again.

“Well,” he scraped his throat, and blinked a couple of times fast, “now that that’s settled.” Kara had to laugh at how uncomfortable he seemed. In some aspects, he was the warmest, most emphatic man she’d ever met. In others, he was so uncomfortable with expressing his own feelings that he hid behind his own tough exterior.

J’onn seemed to be put at ease by her giggle though, and he turned to look at her again. His eyes were soft as he ruffled her hair with his big hand. “Sorry about that,” he grumbled with a smile. “I’ll let you get back to your party.”

He turned to leave, but Kara quickly wrapped her arms around his middle again. J’onn was caught off guard, but seemed delighted with the short hug Kara gave him. She let go again, and smiled.

“I really am sorry, J’onn,” she said.

J’onn nodded, and it seemed like the air between them had been cleared. Kara found she could breathe a lot easier now that they’d spoken again. She’d missed him so much.

She turned around to look around the room again. People were laughing and talking, Ruby was making a mess in her kitchen, and was lightly scolded by Sam, who seemed to multitask between mixing her own drinks and baking… pancakes? Nia and Brainy were trying – and failing – to hide their obvious young love, cuddled close together in one of the nooks of Kara’s apartment. Kara had to smile at the sight. Those two really deserved each other. James was caught in a conversation with J’onn, Alex and Kelly about something or other, but they were laughing, and that was all that mattered to Kara.

Kara could feel her heart soar knowing all her favourite people had gathered around her to support her. It meant so much to her, she couldn’t even express it in words.

Ruby came by, precariously carrying a tray with some fruity drinks, which Kara gratefully accepted. Ruby gave her a quick once-over, and her expression seemed to settle on awe. Her eyes glittered with amazement, and Kara smiled back hesitantly, but she had to admit, she wasn’t quite sure what all that was about.

Ruby begrudgingly moved on to the other people in the room, serving her drinks, and Kara smiled politely as she left, before her eyes caught on a flash of dark hair by the couch, and her smile froze.

When she had first entered the room, she hadn’t registered just who had come in. She’d just noticed Sam and James and Kelly. She had been so overwhelmed by the sheer wonder of her friends being there for her, and having gathered in her apartment to do something nice for her, that she hadn’t let her gaze wander too far. If she had, she might have noticed the apparition earlier on. Because there, sitting uncomfortably stiff on her fixed spot on Kara’s couch – where she used to always be sprawled comfortably under soft blankets and too many pillows in fuzzy sweatpants and worn-out T-shirts – was Lena.

Lena.

Lena was in her apartment.

Lena had come to her surprise party.

“Lena,” she whispered.

The name had been uttered so quietly that the sound couldn’t have carried far, obscured by the noise of people talking and the soft music playing through her speakers, but Kara noticed Lena flinch all the same, as if she’d heard it. Painfully slow, Lena turned her head and looked straight at Kara.

“Lena,” Kara said again, a little louder now. Like her brain could only make sense of the abstract concept if it was spoken aloud.

“Yeah,” Alex said uncomfortably, having moved over when she’d noticed her sister’s perplexed state, “about that.”

She took Kara by her elbow, guided her back towards the door, and leaned in a little closer, the closest she could come to having a private conversation in the over capacitated apartment.

“Look, Kar, I know this is all a little sudden, and believe me,” she urged, “we are all still extremely mad at her, I mean,” Alex said, getting aggressive just thinking about it, “if it were up to me, I’d – ”

Alex shut up once she saw the look her sister was throwing her. She laughed uncomfortably. “But, that’s not the point. What I’m really trying to say is,” she tried to deflect, “she wanted to be here. She told me so herself.” Kara looked uncertain, and Alex softened a little. “I know it’s scary, okay? But I think she really does feel awful and wants to apologise. And,” she whispered conspiratorially, “I heard she had quite the emotional breakdown when you fainted at CatCo.”

Kara looked at the ground and wrapped her arms around her thin frame.

“Hey,” Alex lifted Kara’s head to make her look at her. “For what it’s worth, I yelled at her a lot in the hospital.” She laughed. “And I mean a lot.” At Kara’s disapproving stare, she coughed, and continued. “But she stayed, Kara,” Alex said softly. “I was so fucking angry – still am, mind you – but she took it like a champ, and she stayed. She wanted to make sure you were okay.” Alex stroked Kara’s long hair. “And,” she hesitated, “I might hate her a lot right now, but I’ll never stop being grateful for her taking you to the hospital so fast, and getting you the best possible care she could find.” Alex whispered the last part. “I’ll always owe her a debt for being there for you when I couldn’t.”

Alex’s voice was rough, and it made Kara feel terrible. Alex must’ve been scared out of her mind in that hospital, and she’d put together this whole party for her, it was just… It was just so Alex.

So Kara squeezed her hand. “Okay,” she whispered, when Alex looked up. “Thank you for getting her here.”

She kissed Alex’s cheek, took a deep breath, and turned around. Lena was still looking at her, a glass of wine held tightly in her hand.

Kara could do this. She could. She could.

She wiped her suddenly sweaty hands on her jeans – the one Alex had brought over to the hospital, right along one of her favourite comfy blue sweaters, Rao bless her – and walked over to the couch.

Lena saw her coming, of course, and stood up too, to face her. Everybody in the room was engulfed in some kind of conversation, chatting away happily, but Kara was all too aware that the tension in the room had mounted the second she took a step towards Lena. They might all be talking jovially, but Kara instinctively knew, the attention in the room was focussed on her, even if they were trying not to listen in.

“Lena,” Kara said for the third time that evening.

“Kara,” Lena said politely. The tone could’ve been construed as cold, but the small smile dancing around Lena’s lips told Kara otherwise.

Kara opened her mouth, but realised she didn’t know what to say. Was she supposed to ask about L-Corp? No, that was too impersonal. Should she ask if she could get an extension on her Andrea Rojas interview? No, that seemed very passive aggressive. A terrible idea. Should she ask how things were going between her and James? That just seemed awkward.

Kara grew more nervous with every passing second in which not a word was said. What was she supposed to do? What was she supposed to say? Alex had just sprung this on her, and it wasn’t fair! She’d had zero time to prepare, and everyone knows that you always need five to ten minutes of preparation time when entering a debate! Which was very much what a conversation between her and Lena would lead to. What was she supposed to –

“I didn’t flirt with James!” Kara blurted out.  
“Are you feeling better?” Lena asked simultaneously.

“What?”  
“What?”

They laughed softly, awkwardly.

“You go first,” Kara offered, not ready to deal with the absolutely terrible conversation opener her stupid brain had selected for her.

“Okay,” Lena smiled. “I asked if you were feeling better?”

“Oh,” Kara opened her mouth comically, “yeah totally! Much better,” she rambled. “Almost good to go, ready to get back to CatCo and serve you – I mean work under you! I mean do the article! I mean, not that I feel work pressure or anything, but just, I mean – ”

In that instant, Kara felt very sorry for herself. She knew she tended to ramble when she was nervous – or when she was happy. Or frustrated. Or angry – but this was next level terrible! This level of awkwardness was one for the books if the expression on Alex’s face was anything to go by. Alex looked like she wanted to shoot both Kara and then herself to escape the situation.

Darn it! Kara had succeeded in making this situation go from slightly awkward to very awkward, very quick.

“Gosh, Lena,” she said, shaking her head, “I’m sorry, I’m – ”

“No, Kara.” Kara looked up, and to her surprise, Lena was smiling. “It’s fine. I’m happy you’re back to your rambling self again.” She giggled. “Although I have to say I haven’t heard you ramble this much since we first got to know each other, I think.”

There were tiny crinkles of laughter around Lena’s eyes, and they made Kara light up inside. Lena was smiling. At her, no less!

“Yeah,” Kara smiled, “sorry, I guess I’m just nervous.”

Lena’s smile dimmed at that, and Kara wanted to kick herself. Why’d she have to bring down the mood right when she and Lena were getting to a better place? This was just so typically her.

“Yeah, about that,” Lena sighed, “I – we… I think – ” She seemed to hesitate.

“Well,” Kara said with an awkward smile, in an effort to diffuse the tension, “at least I’m not the only one rambling incoherently anymore.”

“Kara,” Lena said seriously, but with a lingering smile on her lips, “in all honesty, we have to talk about this.”

Kara let her shoulders hang, but nodded.

“But,” Lena said softly, trying to get Kara to look at her again, “that doesn’t mean we have to do that right now, right here, at your party,” she added.

Kara looked up at Lena again, and was taken aback by those beautiful soulful eyes. Sometimes she forgot just how beautiful Lena really was. Her pictures in magazines didn’t do her justice. Lena was beauty personified. She was ethereal. And her eyes emboldened that beauty even more.

“For now though,” Lena continued, “I do have one thing I have to say.”

She reached out one trembling hand, and took Kara’s into her own. For a second, Kara almost wanted to retract her hand when she remembered it was sweaty and gross, but if Lena was put off by it, she didn’t show it, and just grasped it tighter.

“Kara,” Lena said solemnly, “I know there is nothing I can say or do to make up for all the hurt I’ve caused. I’ve acted wildly unprofessional, and you got terribly hurt in the process. I am so. Unbelievably sorry for what I’ve done. For all of it.” She started counting on her fingers. “For not believing you when you said you were sick, for pushing you to get that impossible interview, for – ” Lena almost choked up, but swallowed her emotions like the true businesswoman she was. “And,” she squeezed Kara’s hand a little tighter. “I’m sorry for ever threatening to fire you. It was wrong, and mean, and manipulative, and – ” she seemed to look for the right word, “downright sociopathic!” she decided.

Her eyes bore into Kara’s, and Kara couldn’t possibly say anything in that moment. She was frozen, stuck in Lena’s orbit.

“If you want to take legal measures against CatCo or me personally, I completely understand, and I am willing to reach a settlement, if that’s what you need. I know it won’t make anything right between us, but I just want you to know that I am truly, deeply sorry for what I’ve done. There are no excuses.” Lena cast her eyes down.

Her words did trigger something in Kara, almost as if with the absence of Lena’s eyes on her, Kara could finally think rationally again.

“Wait, what?” she asked confused.

Lena froze. “I’m sorry, what parts needs more clarification? Do you need recommendations for a lawyer?” she asked seriously.

“Lena,” Kara shook her head, “I don’t want to take legal action,” Kara said.

“W-well, are you sure? Kara,” now it was Lena’s turn to shake her head. “Take some time to think about it. You are very much in your right t – ”

“Lena, cut it out!” Kara exclaimed, a little louder than she wanted to. She noticed a few heads turn their way, and she definitely saw Alex tense up, ready to go into fight mode. “I don’t want your money, Lena!” Kara lowered her voice, upset.

Lena looked confused. “Then what do you want me to do, Kara? What can I do to make it right to you?”

Kara almost felt like crying. “I want us to go back to before, Lena!” Kara said desperately. “I want us to be friends again, and not have to worry about yelling at each other, or – or being mean to each other! I want to get ice cream with you, and watch trashy movies on my couch! I – ” Her voice cracked a little bit. “I want to hear about your day, and I want us to organise sleepovers again. I want to get us take-out food again, and, and,” she trailed off. “I want us back like before,” she concluded.

Lena looked taken aback, and sad. Very, _very_ sad.

“Kara,” she whispered pained, “there is a lot I can do to make up for the things I’ve done, but what I can’t do,” she stressed, “is forget about what happened with us. I’m apologising here, for everything I’ve said and done the first time I walked into CatCo after our,” she hesitated, “separation. But that doesn’t mean that I’ve forgotten about the lies, and the deceit. I’m hurt, Kara. And I don’t know how to make it stop hurting.”

Kara flinched.

Lena shook her head. “You know how I feel about betrayal, Kara, you know what it does to me.” She looked at Kara with an unreadable expression in her eyes. “I’m trying to deal with my own destructive behaviour. I’m trying not to lash out anymore, but I can’t forget what you did. I just can’t.”

Lena almost seemed apologetic.

Kara nodded. She knew it was ridiculous, but some part of her had actually believed that talking to Lena would eventually lead to forgiveness, and then their continued, inevitable friendship. This seemed like a huge step back, and a harsh slap in the face.

Logically though, Kara knew Lena was right. Kara wasn’t sure how to get back to where they once were either. She loved Lena, loved her with every atom of her body, but she’d seen Lena in action now. She’d experienced what it was like to have Lena Luthor against her, and not Lena as her friend, and she was terrified. To be honest, Kara wasn’t sure she was ever going to forget the way Lena’s eyes had narrowed, and how they’d stared right into Kara’s when she told her she would be fired if she didn’t bend over backwards to get that interview.

Kara remembered. And she had to admit she didn’t know if she would ever get over that. She didn’t know if it was possible to form a friendship in which one party resented the other, while the other party was scared of the first party! It was all so complicated and painful. It hurt so damn much.

Lena seemed to notice Kara’s distress however, because she quickly piped up to make Kara feel better.

“Don’t get me wrong,” she said sternly, making sure Kara’s eyes didn’t stray from her own face, “I do want that for us, I do want us to get back to the place we were in before eventually, but for right now,” she took a deep breath. “I’m afraid it’s not possible. ”

Kara felt her heart fall in her chest, hitting all her organs on its way down. Her world was crashing and hurting all over again, and she couldn’t help but feel a treacherous little tear jump in her eye.

“Oh Kara,” Lena whispered, hurt. “Oh honey, oh sweetie, no please don’t cry.”

Her hands fluttered helplessly around Kara, trying to make the hurt lessen.

Well of course that did make Kara tear up in earnest. Lena had always had a soft spot for Kara. She always had a hard time seeing Kara hurt or in distress. Her almost natural, instinctive response to those situation in which Kara was terribly upset, was always to comfort, to hug, to love. To make sure that Kara was alright again. And right now, even when she was still angry with Kara, she was doing just that.

Those thoughts made Kara tear up even more, and she tried to wipe them away, but other hands made their way to her face, and rubbed the tears away instead. Lena’s long, nimble fingers dexterously, and carefully wiped the tears from her eyes, looking just as hurt and broken as Kara felt.

“Listen to me, Kara,” Lena vowed, “just because I can’t magically zap us back to the place we were in months ago doesn’t mean I’m not going to try, you hear me.”

She looked at Kara with such force and such conviction, that Kara couldn’t help but nod.

“We may not be as close as we once were,” Lena continued, “but mind you Kara, this was my effort at trying to re-establish a solid basis for our friendship. I want this to be our fresh start. A new foundation, if you will.”

Kara smiled through the tears at Lena’s words, which encouraged her former friend.

“I want to be your friend,” Lena said. “I want to try. I’m just not sure how.”

Lena looked conflicted, like her mind and body were telling her two different things, and Kara wished again that she could fix it all with one magic wish. Lena seemed to catch herself. She shook her head, and smiled a watery smile.

“So,” Lena continued, “I’m going to try. And it’s going to be a process of trial and error, in which I figure out how to make a friend again,” Kara laughed, and Lena’s eyes crinkled in mirth. Then she became serious again.

“I can only apologise for how terribly I’ve treated you, Kara, and I truly hope that one day, you’ll be able to forgive me.”

“Of course I forgive you, Lena,” Kara said, barely letting Lena finish her sentence, still reeling her head around the fact that Lena had said there was a chance. A chance for them to get somewhere better than this terrible place they were at right now. “I never blamed you in the first place.”

Lena looked even sadder at that. She smiled, a tragic, almost artful smile. She brought her hand to the side of Kara’s face, almost like she wanted to stroke her cheek, but thought better of it, and dropped it again. Kara didn’t know why she felt disappointed.

“Maybe you should,” Lena said softly. “I sure did.”

“Lena,” Kara started.

“What did you ask me before?” Lena changed the subject. “I didn’t quite understand.”

Kara was still trying to make sense of all of Lena’s micro-expressions, so at first, she didn’t quite know what Lena was referring to. It wasn’t her fault though! She used to be able to read Lena so well, and now she was left second-guessing every smile that passed over Lena’s face, every movement of her eyes, every change in timbre of her voice.

It was all so confusing.

So when Lena asked about earlier… Earlier.

“Oh!” Kara suddenly remembered, and a hot flush of embarrassment shot through her. “That really – I mean, that, that,” she nodded a bit to herself. “Yeah, that didn’t really come out right.”

“I’m only asking because I truly didn’t understand, what were you trying to ask about James?”

“Oh, well,” Kara shuffled awkwardly, “I – I remember you were upset, before, you know,” she looked up at the ceiling, trying desperately to get rid of the heat she felt rise to her cheeks, “at CatCo. About James.”

Lena was quiet for a bit. “Oh,” she said simply.

Rao, maybe she was still mad about that?

“Lena,” Kara said quickly, “I just want you to know nothing happened between us. I promise you, I would never, ever do that to you! And I know you saw some dubious things, but I swear I - ”

“Kara, Kara,” Lena interrupted her. “Please, slow down,” she pleaded softly.

And like every single time Lena had implored her to do something in that voice, Kara complied.

“I know nothing happened between you and James,” she began, wringing her hands. “And I know I was very unfair to you about that, but you have to know,” she said sternly, “I wasn’t mad about that. That was just a convenient excuse. I – ”

Lena pinched the bridge of her nose. “God, I’m so lousy at apologising. I didn’t even tell you what I was apologising for. This must be so confusing.”

Kara couldn’t exactly disagree with her on that. She did, however, wait patiently for Lena to continue. Lena thought for a bit, and then took a deep breath.

“Kara,” Lena finally continued softly, “all of it, everything I did or said at CatCo… it was never your fault. I needed to vent, and I used everything you did against you. You could’ve adopted a puppy, and I still would’ve found a way to use that against you. That’s why I needed to apologise, Kara.”

She stared pleadingly into Kara’s eyes, willing her to understand.

“I was hurt and angry about what you did, and even though,” she closed her eyes briefly, looking so hurt Kara wanted to hug her again to make her feel better. She didn’t. “Even though it is absolutely no excuse, Kara, I lashed out because I was hurt, and I made your life unbearable. You didn’t deserve any of it, Kara. And I am so, so sorry for acting out the way that I did.”

And Kara understood. She’d always had, in a way, but hearing those words come out of Lena’s mouth, didn’t soften the hurt. On the contrary; hearing that Lena actively went out of her way to hurt Kara was something she never thought she’d actually have to deal with. Her best friend wanted to hurt her. Wanted to make her suffer.

“Kara, I knew you would never do that to me. I swear.”

Kara was taken aback by the solemn tone in Lena’s voice, and the desperation behind her words. It felt like Lena needed Kara to believe her. She needed Kara to understand. So Kara nodded. Lena looked so relieved when she did, that Kara felt the need to reaffirm what was implicitly stated.

“I understand.”

Kara’s voice was groggy, and painted by the hurt Lena’s previous statement had caused, but it was honest. She did understand. Lena was hurt, so she wanted to hurt the person who’d hurt her in the first place. It was all very Shakespearian, and Kara almost had to laugh at the though if she wasn’t so sad.

Lena nodded though, and she smiled again, which was all Kara needed to feel better again.

Kara had to focus on the positives. Lena had apologised. She’d admitted to treating Kara horribly, and she’d said there was a chance. A chance for them to be friends again. Lena had opened the metaphorical door one tiny crack. She had promised she would try her hardest to be the friend Kara deserved, and so Kara vowed to never stop trying as well. Kara was going to try and find a way to deal with the hurt that Lena had caused. Her apology had been the first step, and Kara was going to make sure, that the long, steady friendship she’d built with Lena wouldn’t go to waste. Lena had opened the door a crack, and Kara was going to push that door with all her might if it meant them becoming friends again.

Lena took a step back. She painted on a smile that Kara recognised as her ‘smiling through the pain’ smile. Kara hated that smile almost as much as her corporate one.

“I think that’s quite enough of seriousness for one night,” she laughed. “You should really get back to your party. It’s in your honour, after all.”

“But,” Kara protested, but she was cut off when Lena squeezed her arm.

“Really, Kara,” Lena said emphatically, “it’s okay. We can pick this up later. Please,” she pleaded, “go and enjoy your evening.”

Kara sighed, but nodded. “Okay,” she responded petulantly.

Lena smiled in response, and that smile felt a little more genuine, Kara thought.

“Go,” Lena mouthed. So, with one parting smile, Kara turned around to join the group once more. She was ready to join her party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading! I'm so sorry about the long wait. I had a month filled with exams, so I had very little time to do anything else. The next chapter should be up a lot sooner. 
> 
> As always, you can come talk to me on Tumblr: https://thingsanddreamsandstuff.tumblr.com  
> I hope you all have a great day! 
> 
> Lots of love!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just in time for the new Supergirl episode! Enjoy this update of no less than 16k words to make up for the long stretches of time between my updates!

The party was in full swing.

Laughter resounded throughout the studio, and it was a miracle Kara’s landlord hadn’t barged in to complain about it yet.

Kara’s cheeks hurt from smiling so much. She couldn’t help it. This was one of the best nights she’d had in months! People were talking and laughing and stuffing themselves with the delicious take-out and homemade pastries that Sam, Alex and Ruby had prepared for them. Even Lena had tentatively joined the group to make small talk, and was currently wrapped up in a conversation with Kelly about the differences between living in Metropolis and living in National City.

It was amazing. Kara couldn’t wish for anything more. She looked at Lena, throwing her head back in carefree laughter.

Well maybe one thing.

Kara shook her head, and went to sit at the kitchen island. She grabbed the can of lemonade – freshly squeezed, Ruby told her, before rushing off to serve cookies to someone else – and poured herself a drink.

Things were good. They were okay.

Then, Nia, red in the face, slid onto a stool, right across from Kara.

Kara raised her eyebrows.

“You okay there, Nia?” she asked.

“Yes, sure, fine,” Nia said quickly, but her eyes kept darting around the room nervously, completely contradicting her previous statement.

“Really,” Kara drawled, “you don’t look fine.”

Nia nervously bit one of her nails and hummed absentmindedly, still not looking directly at Kara.

“Hey,” Kara snapped her fingers in front of Nia’s face. Nia’s eyes quickly found Kara’s.

“Huh?” she asked.

Kara tilted her head. “What’s wrong with you?” she asked softly.

Nia pursed her lips for all of two seconds before she burst.

“Well, okay, it’s just… is Lena mad at me?”

Kara’s eyebrows almost rose to the top of her hairline.

“What?”

“Well you know!” Nia said exasperatedly. “Lena was mad at you for the whole Supergirl thing, and like, I get that we’re not as close as you guys are, but,”

She blew the air out of her mouth.

“What if she’s mad at superheroes in general? What if she’s mad I’m dreamer?”

Nia gasped.

“What if she’s mad I didn’t tell her I’m dreamer? Or what if she thinks everybody’s been lying to her? And it’s not like I’ve been lying to her per se, I mean,” she let out a nervous laugh, “we barely even know each other, but still! And I want to talk to her about it, but what if she doesn’t want to? And, God, I can’t even do it with Kelly around!”

Kara, who used to be the so-called rambler queen, had trouble following all that. Every time she wanted to interrupt, Nia’s rambling continued, until there was no space for an interlocutor anymore.

“And what if she yells at me?”

Nia paled.

“God, I know she did with you, and like, I applaud you for taking it like a champ, but you don’t know me! If she yells at me, I will start crying,” she swore.

“Nia!” Kara finally interrupted.

Nia fell silent.

“I’m sure she’ll react ten times better to you being Dreamer than to me being Supergirl,” Kara reassured her.

Nia still looked nervous.

“You sure?” she asked with a trembling voice.

Kara smiled sweetly. “I’m sure.”

Nia nodded.

“Okay,” she whispered to herself. “Okay.”

“Hey guys,”

Kelly and Lena sauntered closer to the kitchen isle. Lena went to sit on a stool right across from Nia, who seemed to be dangerously close to having her first aneurism.

“Snack?” Nia asked loudly, shoving a basket of vegetable crisps towards Lena.

Lena looked a little taken aback, but smiled hesitantly.

“No thanks, I’m good,” she said sweetly.

Nia nodded, but continued to stare at Lena with giant eyes, almost like a prey looking her deadly predator in the eye.

“Yeah, sure, no, that’s fine, it’s whatever,” she said trying – and failing – to sound casual.

Lena looked like she wasn’t quite sure what to make of the whole interaction, her eyes fleeting over to Kara as if to ask: ‘Is she okay?”

Kara waved away her concerns with a warm smile, and Lena relaxed, taking a sip from her glass of wine.

Kelly, however, did not move to sit down. Instead, she put on a blazer, and looked apologetic.

“I’m really sorry, but I have to leave. I have two patients tomorrow morning, and I still have to review their cases,” she explained.

A series of disappointed sounds rose from the group, and Kelly waved them away with a promise to make it up to them.

“I’ll walk you out,” Alex offered, but Kelly shook her head.

“It’s fine, Alex, really,” she said with a smile. “You go and enjoy this party. I’m taking an Uber home.”

Alex sighed, but eventually grumbled: “Alright.”

Kelly grinned, and pulled at the hem of Alex’s grey T-shirt.

“That doesn’t mean I don’t want a proper goodbye,” she smirked.

Alex grinned, and let herself be pulled flush against Kelly. Her hand went to the side of Kelly’s head, and she gently guided Kelly’s face towards hers.

“Goodbye,” she whispered, before her lips finally connected to Kelly’s.

The moment she did that, woops and cheers resonated throughout the apartment. But Kara didn’t cheer. She gasped and her mouth fell open.

Only then did Alex vaguely register that she might have forgotten to inform Kara that she and Kelly were dating now.

She quickly disconnected their lips and turned to look at Kara, who looked absolutely baffled.

Before Alex could utter a single word, Kara turned to James.

“You knew about this?” she asked.

James rubbed the back of his head and scrunched his nose.

“Yeah,” he mumbled, “yeah, I did.”

“Your sister,” Kara pointed at Kelly.

James nodded.

Kara pointed at Alex.

“And my sister?”

James pursed his lips and nodded.

Kara halted for a second. Her mind seemed to be running at full speed.

“Kara,” Alex tried carefully, but Kara held up a hand to stop her.

“Oh my God,” she said finally. “Oh, my God!”

Alex looked worried, while Kelly seemed to be trying to figure out how the hell to flee the scene.

“Oh my God!” Kara said again, but this time, her voice sounded more elated than before.

“Of course,” she said. “It all makes sense now!”

“It does?” Alex asked hesitantly.

Kara beamed.

“Of course! You and Kelly! Kelly and you! Danvers and Olsen!”

Her eyes widened and her lips trembled in utmost joy.

“Oh my God,” Kara said elated. “You’re Dansen!”

Alex was absolutely stunned for a good few seconds. She had to admit, even after years of having an alien sister, the other girl _still_ managed to surprise her. She had to say she was really at a loss for words.

Then, Kelly started laughing. Alex quickly turned to look at her.

“I’m sorry, babe,” she grinned, “but I gotta say, I love the name Dansen.”

Alex rolled her eyes, but smiled nonetheless, and Kara almost melted at the sight. Her sister hadn’t looked this happy in a long time, she decided. She should treasure this. Alex and Kelly. A Danvers and an –

“Oh my God,” Kara turned to James, who was shaken up by the enthusiasm in her voice.

“What?” he asked carefully.

“Your sister and my sister are dating!” Kara yelled out.

James laughed. “I guess they are.”

Kara gasped. “That means you’re my brother-in-law!” she said gleefully. “I’ve always wanted an older brother!”

James, however, frowned. “Does that mean I kissed my little sister?”

Kara’s shoulders dropped immediately.

 _Gross_. Stupid. Why had she even – Rao, this was stupid. And silly. And she shouldn’t have said it.

James leaned in closer. He rested his hand on hers, and smiled his dimpled grin.

“I’m just kidding, Kara,” he said, and Kara perked up.

“Really?” she asked hopefully.

James laughed loudly. “Of course, I’ve always wanted – ”

Kelly shot him a glare with her eyebrows raised so high, James quickly amended his statement.

“Just kidding.”

He put his arm around Kara’s shoulder and squeezed her tightly.

“I’m glad my sister’s dating your sister,” he said honestly, and Kara beamed. “And I’m glad that out of all the weird women who could become my sister-in-law, it’s you.”

Kara just about melted, and leaned her head on James’ shoulder gratefully. He really was comfort wrapped up in one giant good-looking man. She was glad to have him.

“Okay, who’s talking about in-laws exactly?” Alex said.

Her arms were crossed across her chest, and she sported a scowl that could bring a grown man to tears. More pointedly though, her stance was matched exactly by Kelly, who was looking just as intimidating as Alex. It was very disconcerting.

“Seconded,” Kelly pointed out.

“Don’t make it weird, guys.”

“Sorry,” James and Kara mumbled at the same time. But James still held her hand for a good couple of seconds, and Kara was happy.

“I really have to go now,” Kelly said, more to Alex than to anyone else. “I’ll see you guys later?”

“Yeah!”

“Of course,”

“Sure!”

“Okay,” Kelly said. She kissed Alex lightly on the lips one last time, before waving goodbye and leaving through the door.

Alex stared at the door for a second longer before she turned around and met Kara’s overly excited eyes.

Alex sighed deeply. “Okay,” she resigned herself to her fate, “lay it on me.”

“Oh my God, Alex!” Kara squealed. “She. Is. Ah-ma-zing!”

She rounded the table, and just about jumped Alex for information.

“You have got to tell me everything! Who initiated the first kiss? Have you been on any dates yet? If yes, where did you go? If not, I have a list of great first-date places to go. I’ll mail it to you. Is she staying in National City? If so, is she going to be working at the D.E.O? Do you think your relationship is serious? Will you – ”

“Kara!” Alex cut her off.

Kara’s mouth shut close.

Alex rubbed the spot between her eyebrows and closed her eyes.

“Can we please talk about this later? I don’t know everything yet. This is new, and,” she sighed, “I don’t want to mess it up.”

Kara lowered her shoulders and sighed.

“I understand,” she said disappointed. “But we are going to have a sister-meeting about this,” she said seriously.

Alex laughed, and pulled Kara into a hug.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” she said, before releasing her sister, and chasing a desperately-needed drink.

Kara smiled at Alex’s retreating back, before sitting back down at the kitchen isle.

“I’m dreamer!” Nia blurted out suddenly.

Kara almost fell of her stool at Nia's loud interjection. Lena seemed to fare about as well as her. Her eyes had shot open, and she’d almost knocked over her drink.

“Uh, Nia – ”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you! But I didn’t want you to be mad at me, please don’t be mad at me. And also, please don’t yell at me, I don’t want to cry,” Ruby pleaded in quick succession.

“Nia, Nia,” Lena said, putting her hand on Nia’s.

Nia fell silent at the move, and her eyes widened comically.

Lena tilted her head apologetically. “I kind of figured that out already,” she said slowly. “You know… you’re always with Kara, you and dreamer kind of look and sound alike… Not to mention you’re here with Brainy.”

“Oh,” Nia whispered.

“Yeah,” Lena smiled. “I promise I’m not mad at you. And I definitely won’t yell at you, I promise.”

“Oh,” Nia repeated, but her shoulders slumped in relief. “That’s good, I, yeah.” She smiled. “That’s good.”

Lena shook her head with a smile, and Nia looked about a hundred times more comfortable from that moment on.

Kara smiled at the interaction, and she could swear she saw Lena smile at her too from across the table.

Kara’s eyes drifted across the table. Sam, Ruby and Alex had really outdone themselves. There were so many trays filled with the most delicious of things. Potstickers, little pieces of toast with salmon and cucumber, cinnamon roles, even tiny little croissants!

Kara smiled and dove right in.

When she looked up, however, Ruby was on the other side of the table, looking at her with unrestrained awe in her eyes.

Kara put down the potsticker she’d only _just_ snatched off the table and sighed.

“Okay, Ruby,” she asked, “what’s up?”

Ruby grinned so wide, it would have freaked Kara out if she didn’t know the girl so well.

Ruby leaned closer, and glanced around the table, like she was making sure they were the only two sharing this information.

They were. The others were all caught up in some deep conversation about something or other.

“You’re her,” the girl whispered conspiratorially. “You’re Supergirl.”

Oh crap. Kara had forgotten all about that.

“Yeah,” Kara mumbled, running a hand through her hair. “I guess you know about that too, now.”

“Oh,” Ruby piped up quickly, “you don’t need to worry about me! I’ll keep your secret, I swear it!”

Kara smiled gratefully back at her, before retrieving her little potsticker.

“Besides,” Ruby said happily, “we’re basically family now, and family protects family.”

Kara almost choked on her potsticker. “I’m sorry,” she coughed, “we’re what now?”

“Ruby, are you harassing Kara?” Sam joined the conversation.

She turned to Kara.

“I’m sorry,” the other woman said, “ever since she found out you’re Supergirl, she’s been talking non-stop about how you two are probably related.”

“It’s fi- ”

“Not probably!” Ruby said angrily. “We’re both from the same planet! That inherently proves that we stem from the same ancestor. Therefore,” she wiggled her finger between herself and Kara, not taking her eye of Sam, “we’re family,” she said seriously.

Sam sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Honey – ”

“It’s okay, Sam,” Kara said quickly.

She turned to the angry teenager and said. “I do believe you have a point there. We could absolutely share an ancestor.”

The other girl perked up.

“Really?” Ruby asked hopefully.

“Of course,” Kara said seriously. “It’s only basic evolution theory combined with ancestral history.”

Ruby’s chest puffed up. “That’s what I said.”

Kara laughed.

“Well, it’s very nice to discover a new member of the family.”

Ruby’s eyes sparkled. “It so is.”

Over her shoulder, Sam shot a grateful smile at Kara, who happily returned it.

“So,” Ruby said, “now that we’ve established we’re family… don’t you think I should know more about my home planet?” she asked hopefully.

“Uh,” Kara hesitated.

Well.

She hadn’t thought of that.

Of course Ruby would want to know.

But it was kind of complicated.

It wasn’t like Kara didn’t want to talk about Krypton, it really wasn’t. She loved talking about Krypton. She loved Krypton. She loved sharing all the cute teensy details about _her_ planet. Her home.

It was just… she so rarely did.

It was a bit of a secret. Something she only shared with a handful of people.

She still remembered how secretive, how important it had felt to share her story with Alex when they were kids. They’d lain closely together in Alex’s bed, and Alex had listened in quiet awe, while Kara told her her people’s story, in a way that almost felt holy, spiritual. Kara had spilled words like a waterfall, and Alex had soaked them up, one by one.

At this point in her life, Kara was convinced Alex was the only person on this planet who knew just as much about Krypton as Kara herself did. Even Kal-El’s knowledge didn’t compare. He only knew the stuff he could find out from the fortress of Solitude.

But Alex, Alex knew everything. The details, the feelings, the smells, the sounds and the sights. Kara had explained them all to her the best she could, comparing them to everything she could find on earth.

Sometimes Eliza would join them. She would lie down next to them, and stroke their hair, and let Kara talk about Krypton for hours, even if both her and Alex had school the next day. She wouldn’t say much, just ask intermitted questions or clarifications about something or other every now and then.

Those moments were theirs. They were sacred. Kara cherished every one of those nights. She appreciated her family for wanting to learn about Krypton as much as they wanted to teach her about earth.

Even Winn, even James, even Lucy… they were all her friends, and they’d all known about her secret since forever, but they still weren’t privy to the secrets that Krypton held. Not in the way Alex was. Not in the way Eliza was. It was theirs. It was her family’s story that she would only share with her new family.

It was a secret. Kara’s memories of Krypton were the only testaments of Krypton’s existence. The only proof that her planet had existed, had lived, had thrived, before ultimately succumbing to its own hubris.

Kara felt protective over Krypton’s history. It was hers. She didn’t want to share it.

But looking in Ruby’s hopeful big brown eyes melted something inside her. Maybe it was time to share Krypton. Even if it was just with the people in her living room. The people she trusted most on this planet. Maybe it was time not to let her history go to waste by residing in only two other human heads. Maybe it was time to share Krypton’s story.

Kara took a deep breath and smiled at Ruby.

“Of course,” she said softly. “What would you like to know?”

Before Ruby could even squeal out excitedly, Sam interrupted.

“Oh Kara, you don’t have to do that!” she said.

Ruby shot her a death glare, which Sam pointedly ignored.

“I know Ruby’s insistent, but she’ll understand if you’d rather not talk about it,” she placed a soft hand on Kara’s shoulder. “Really.”

Ruby looked just about ready to have a verbal throw down with her mom, but when Sam’s words sank in, she reluctantly nodded her head.

“I’d understand,” she mumbled begrudgingly.

Kara smiled. Ruby really was a sweetheart.

“I know you would,” Kara agreed, “but ask away, anyway.”

Sam looked at her, as if to double check if it was really okay, and Kara winked in response.

“Oh boy,” Ruby said. “Where to begin?”

She rubbed her forehead. “I’ve got so many questions! I should’ve written them down!”

Kara laughed, but when she saw that Ruby actually looked a little disappointed in herself, Kara quickly took pity on the younger girl.

“How about,” Kara suggested, “I just talk about my daily life on Krypton, and you just interrupt with whatever question pops into your head? How does that sound?”

Kara was sure there was no way Ruby could’ve smiled any wider if she wanted to. The girl was beaming in a way that made Kara blush. She never thought she could make anyone so happy with just information about her day-to-day life at home. It was quite flattering.

Ruby nodded eagerly. “Yes please!”

“Okay,”

Kara wanted to start talking, but noticed that the others had seemed to catch on to what she had been telling Ruby. More and more conversations were quieting down, in favour of coming closer to the kitchen island to subtly – or very unsubtly in Nia’s case – listen to her stories.

From the corner of her eye, Kara could even see Lena approach the table, and her heart soared.

That was a huge win.

Lena wasn’t just tolerating her Supergirl persona now. She was actively acknowledging its existence by coming closer to listen to Krypton’s stories. Kara willed herself to stay calm, but she couldn’t hide the grin that could’ve matched Ruby’s in brightness.

“So,” Kara said, “why don’t we start with school?”

* * *

“Wow,” Ruby exclaimed. “So you weren’t just smart, you were a genius!”

Kara laughed.

She had been talking about Krypton for more than an hour. She didn’t know how, but once she started opening up little by little, the words just kept flowing. She’d talked about everything from transportation to linguistics, from interplanetary relations to the architecture of Argos. She’d also shared some tiny bits of her personal life back home, but kept them sparse, more as details in the bigger picture that was Krypton’s history.

Somehow they had ended up discussing different functions and jobs on Krypton, and Kara might have mentioned that she was in the running to become a member of the Science guild back home.

Her friends were all looking at her in awe and admiration, and Kara couldn’t help but blush. She had never really been able to brag much about anything. When she was in high school in Midvale, she had been called stupid, slow and autistic because she couldn’t write essays in English as well as her peers, and because she easily failed tests because she was distracted by the loud sounds around her. But now, she could tell stories about the time she was on an equal playing ground. Back when her father had led her through his labs, and shown her all the experiments and tests him and his team were working on. Back when she was considered a smart and bright child, with an equally bright future ahead of her.

“Well, I wouldn’t say genius…” Kara mumbled.

“Totally a genius,” Alex replied, completely ignoring Kara’s previous answer. “I’m telling you, she could’ve become the scientist that solved global warming and overpopulation in her sleep.”

Kara blushed.

“Alex,” she whined.

“So why didn’t you?”

Kara turned to Lena.

This was the first time she’d spoken up since the conversation had turned to Krypton. She’d just sat quietly at the kitchen island, sipping her glass of red wine, but listening attentively to what was being said.

Lena was good at that, Kara mused. She was good at being unnoticeable, vague, a background figure. It was one of her strategies. She would make people forget she was even in the room, and then she would soak up all the information that was being spread, so she could analyse, contemplate and weaponise on said information. Kara knew she did it enough in board meetings.

But something about the way she formulated her question made Kara think that this wasn’t Lena looking for something to hurt Kara. This was Lena being interested in her friend’s life. This was Lena being observant of Kara’s emotions, and using her intuiting to pry further.

“Oh,” Kara said uncomfortably, “I don’t know. When I came here, English was so hard for me to understand. While the science parts were all super easy here on earth, I couldn’t really explain myself very well?”

She doubted very much the others could relate to what she was saying, but Lena nodded in understanding anyway.

Encouraged, Kara continued.

“For example, I knew what the concept gravity was, had played around with it and its many equations for years, but I didn’t know the English word. So when I asked the teacher to explain it to me, she obviously concluded that I was years behind on science, and dismissed me right away.”

Kara looked down, and intertwined her fingers.

It was hard to think back to how badly the adults in school had regarded her. She caught the condescending glances, the muted gossip in the halls in which teachers and students alike were partaking. They called Kara a lot of names, a lot of words she didn’t know. But that didn’t mean she was blind to the tones they used, or the way in which they spat out the words like insults. Kara came to realise very soon just what those people thought of her.

“Also,” she continued, “since I was bad at English, I was immediately written off on a lot of other stuff too. I had to ask for the harder exercises, because everybody else always expected me to be dumb. Then again,” she shot a furtive glance at Lena, “I also wasn’t allowed to showcase how much more I knew on certain subjects. I couldn’t give myself away. I don’t know,”

Kara waved her hand dismissively. Her cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

_C’mon Kara, this isn’t a therapy session. Wrap it up._

“Since I was so bored with how easy it was, and since I knew I could never implement my Kryptonian knowledge, I just started focussing on other things,” Kara said with a shrug of her shoulders.

Silence followed her words. Then:

“Those teachers sound really mean,” Ruby decided.

Kara gave a short laugh. “I guess so. But they weren’t all bad.”

Alex looked like she heavily disputed that answer, but luckily, before she could way in, Ruby continued.

“So,” Ruby said thoughtfully, “you were meant to be on the science track your entire life? You were prepared by your parents and everything, but you still chose to do something completely different?”

Kara shrugged. “Pretty much.”

“Do you think you would’ve changed field on Krypton as well?” Ruby pondered. “Since you love writing and journalism so much?”

“No,” Kara said firmly, “never.”

“Why not?”

“My father would have had a heart attack. He would’ve been so disappointed,” Kara said. “All his life he wanted someone to follow in his footsteps, and he was just so happy to have a daughter who could,” Kara smiled sadly. “If I had gone into the artists Guild, which is about the closest I could get to writing, I would have broken his heart.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Ruby put up her hands. “Your dad would be mad if he knew you weren’t doing science right now?”

She looked around the group of adults.

“That’s crazy! My mom would never be mad if I didn’t want to do business, right mom?”

She turned to Sam with big, questioning eyes. Sam stroked Ruby’s hair, and kissed the top of her head.

“Of course not, baby. You do whatever you want. As long as – ”

“Yeah, yeah,” Ruby said impatiently, “as long as I don’t get pregnant at a frat party and drop out of college, I know.”

Sam laughed wholeheartedly, and the others soon joined in.

“Exactly.”

“That must be hard,” Lena said softly.

Kara’s laughter died out and she looked over at her friend.

“What?” she asked, the memory of a smile still on her lips.

Lena looked uncomfortable as the attention was once again on her.

“I said, it must be hard. Knowing your dad wouldn’t be happy knowing what you do.”

The remnants of Kara’s smile faded away. She fixed her eyes on the wooded table counter in front of her. For the first time since she’d started talking, she didn’t quite know what to say. She noticed a tiny dent in the wood, and she started chipping away at it with a fingernail.

“I guess,” she said nonchalantly. “I mean,” she frowned. “No. No, it wasn’t easy,” she concluded. “I spent a long time fighting with myself over it, but I finally decided.”

She looked up at Lena.

“The dead are dead. I have to go on living, and make the most of my life here. There is no point trying to please the dead. Even if you so desperately want to. I love writing. I wouldn’t give it up for anyone or anything,” she decided firmly.

She felt a warm hand on her shoulder, and grasped it in return. Rao bless Alex and her ever-comforting presence.

Lena nodded thoughtfully. “I get that,” she said, and then she smiled.

She smiled.

Kara lit up. She wanted to berate herself for being so irrationally happy about the tiniest of things, but she forced her stupid negative voice back down.

Lena had smiled at her, and Kara was over the moon.

“Hey, anybody want these last cookies?” Sam called out.

Instantly, the room was bustling with life again. The conversations became more mixed and took on a happier tone.

“Hey Kara?” Ruby asked shyly.

Kara hummed in response.

“Can we do another lightning round of questions? I think I’ve come up with a few more. If that’s okay with you,” she hurried to say.

Kara smiled. “Of course, please.”

She gestured with her hand for the younger girl to go on.

“Okay great,” Ruby beamed. “First question. Did you guys have jails?”

“Nope, people who committed horrible crimes were banished to a place called the Phantom Zone, where time does not pass.”

“So no capital punishment?”

“Nope.”

“Who was your best friend on Krypton?”

“A girl name Morgana. She was three years older than me, and always got into trouble. She was a lot of fun.”

Ruby looked suspicious.

“More fun than me?”

“Absolutely not,” Kara solemnly swore, putting two fingers up as a sign of her trustworthiness.

Ruby seemed satisfied, and moved on.

“Religion?”

“Raoism. Rao was the name we gave to our Red sun. We believed he brought us life, light and happiness, and we put all of our faith in him.”

Ruby looked confused.

“You thought a sun was your god?”

“Ruby!”

Kara smiled.

“It’s okay, Sam. I understand.”

She turned to Ruby.

“It does make some sense, I think,” Kara pointed out, “because the sun is what allowed for our crops to grow, for energy to be produced, which in turn powered our scientific inventions. It was literally at the centre of our life. So, yeah,” she smiled, “I still believe that.”

Ruby nodded, her cheeks a little red.

“Right,” she said awkwardly, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude.”

Kara shook her head.

“It’s okay, Ruby, I promise.”

Ruby nodded.

Kara raised her eyebrows. “You want to ask me another question?”

Ruby lit up again.

“Sure! Ehm – ”

Ruby stared at the tabletop with scrunched up eyebrows, trying to think of her next question.

“Okay,” she gave up, “I have no idea about what to ask you anymore, so… what is something about Krypton that would totally shock me?”

Kara laughed.

“Well,” she said leaning in, “did you know that Kryptonians weren’t conceived during sex?”

Ruby’s eyes grew three sizes. “What?” she asked astounded. “No way!” She looked at Kara suspiciously. “Now you’re just making stuff up.”

Kara laughed. “I’m not!” she swore. “Kryptonians were designed in labs using the parents’ DNA samples. Then, the embryo would be placed in uterus-resembling pods that would help them grow and develop.”

Ruby’s mouth hung open.

“In fact,” Kara said gleefully, “my cousin was the first baby in centuries to be conceived the ‘human’ way.”

“So you still could then?” Ruby clarified. “Like, your bodies can still… conceive humans?”

Kara laughed. She was enjoying Ruby’s astonishment immensely.

“Yes we can.”

“Then why didn’t you?”

“Well,” Kara thought aloud, “Kryptonian society was very much founded upon scientific principals. We wanted to make anything and everything as sterile and effective as possible. With scientific methods to conceive and perfect offspring, we could supposedly create the genetically perfect Kryptonian.”

She scoffed.

“Supposedly.”

“You don’t agree?”

Kara softened slightly at the younger girl’s honest question.

“Maybe it’s because I experienced my teenage years here on earth, but I’ve found that I disagree on a lot of Krypton’s… policies.”

“Such as?” Ruby asked carefully.

Kara sighed. “Well,” she said, “for starters, I disagree with Krypton’s idea of a cold, scientific society devoid of exuberant emotions. People on Krypton lived according to the ideology that we should be united by knowledge, not by love. Which, to an extent, makes sense, but – ”

She looked at Ruby with soft eyes.

“We need more love in the world. We need people to care, both about themselves and for others. We need to appreciate each other more. When I first came here, I couldn’t believe how warm and loving people were with each others. Of course my parents were affectionate with me, but,” she shook her head, “it was nothing compared to how parents hugged and kissed their children in public. That was unthinkable to us.”

She dropped her shoulders.

“Science is amazing, Ruby, and it can help us tons, but if people don’t care about each other, and show their love for one another – ”

Kara’s eyes drifted off to Lena, who seemed to be listening to a story Sam was telling her and Alex, but Kara would bet that she was actually trying to hear what Kara was telling Ruby.

“Well, then we would have a pretty boring world. Believe me,” she said.

Ruby nodded.

“Okay.”

Kara scraped her throat and tried to turn the conversation around.

“Did you know that we also perfected the concept of clones?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.

Ruby’s eyes widened. “No? Tell me!”

Kara smirked.

“Some other time, kiddo,” she said ruffling Ruby’s hair. “I gotta save something for the next time! Otherwise I won’t have anything cool to tell you, and you’ll grow bored of me!”

Ruby grinned.

“Never,” she said, and came around the table to give Kara a rib-crushing hug.

Kara smiled against Ruby’s hair, before the other girl let go, and joined her mom, enquiring about the topic of conversation.

Kara smiled, and tuned into some of the other conversations going on in the room. James was discussing different camera’s with Nia, Brainy was trying to figure out what the purpose of a rubik’s cube was, and Sam was amusing everyone with a story from L-Corp’s branch in Metropolis.

Kara was delighted just to sit back and soak up the radiating happiness being dispersed in the room. She folded her arms on the kitchen table, and rested her chin on her elbows, resting comfortably. With a tired, satisfied and carefree smile, she observed the banter between her friends, and laughed when it required her input.

She was content.

Then the doorbell rang.

Kara sighed. She hated getting up when she was comfortable. She moved to stand up, but Alex’s hand pushed her back into the chair.

“You rest,” Alex said, “I’ll get it.”

“Thanks, Al,” Kara said.

“No sweat,” Alex said walking towards the door. “Besides, chances are, I’ll be able to help them since, you know, everybody you know somehow also translates to everybody I know.”

She put her hand on the doorknob and turned to Kara with a frown.

“It’s sad,” she deadpanned. “I need to make new friends.”

Kara just laughed at Alex’ silliness, and tuned back into the conversation. Brainy was sharing a story about how he was once harassed in a diner by anti-Alien activists, and consequently rescued by one very angry Nia.

It was a heartwarming story, but Kara couldn’t help but be distracted. She’d heard Alex open the door, but Alex hadn’t said who it was. She turned to the door, but whoever had rung was obscured by Alex’s body.

Kara huffed. God she hated not having her superpowers. She wanted to be able to eavesdrop and have her X-ray vision so she could tell who was trying to come in!

Kara leaned back on the barstool and tried to listen to what was being said as best she could.

She could make out a distinct, faintly familiar, feminine voice say: “Like I said, I must have the wrong address. I was looking for a Miss Danvers.”

“I’m _a_ Miss Danvers,” Alex replied dryly, and Kara rolled her eyes. “But somehow I don’t think I’m the one you’re looking for.”

The other woman went silent.

“Forgive me,” she said quickly, “I didn’t realise she was married. I’ll be on my way.”

That was all Kara needed to hear to slide off her barstool and walk towards the door. Luckily, Alex had at least had the good sense to stop the woman before she could actually leave.

“No wait, I’m sorry. I should’ve clarified.”

She looked over her shoulder to see Kara arrive, and she opened the door wider. Then, Kara finally saw had come by unannounced. Standing uncomfortably in her dooropening, clad in a black suit with a blush-worthy neckline and heels that made her taller than Alex, was Andrea Rojas.

The woman was looking at Alex with quiet discontent in her eyes, but she quickly lit up when her eyes fell on Kara.

“Kara Danvers,” she exclaimed.

“Miss Rojas,” Kara replied confused. “This is a surprise! What can I do for you?”

Alex crossed her arms over her chest and frowned.

“ _The_ Andrea Rojas?” she asked. “Seriously?”

Miss Rojas glanced at Alex, but quickly diverted her eyes back to Kara.

“I was wondering if we could talk?”

“Of course,” Kara said.

She threw Alex a meaningful look, one that clearly meant, move your butt somewhere else, but Alex managed to ignore it completely.

Kara sighed.

“Do you mind?”

“Not at all,” Alex replied, staying put.

Kara rolled her eyes and then glared at Alex.

“Alex,” she deadpanned.

“Mmh?” Alex hummed in response, not taking her eyes off Miss Rojas.

“Move,” Kara ordered.

Alex looked at Kara with an undignified expression, but Kara would deal with that later.

She pushed Alex aside with her hip, and looked at her with so much fire that Alex realised that if she didn’t move, it would cost her dearly.

At least Alex knew when she had lost. She threw her hands up in defeat, glared at Miss Rojas one final time, and moved back into the living room, where everybody else was craning their necks to see the mysterious newcomer.

Kara turned back to Miss Rojas.

“I’m sorry about that,” she apologised.

“No need, Kara,” Miss Rojas replied with a small smile that Kara couldn’t help but return. “It’s my fault for interrupting your…” she raised her eyebrows. “Soiree? Sleepover?”

Kara blushed. “Oh no, it’s nothing like that. It’s just a little get-together. With food. And wine. No games, though. That's game night. This is just... a party. But also not really a party.”

Rao, she felt stupid. If she continued speaking in such short sentences, Eliza may soon send her back to that speech therapist she had to go to years ago.

Luckily, Miss Rojas was kind enough to let her stammering pass without any comments.

“Well,” she smiled, “it’s all the same. I really am sorry for barging in like this, uninvited,” she apologised.

“Oh no,” Kara said quickly, “I’m happy to see you, really!” she added. “It’s nice that you came by to, uh,”

Kara fell silent.

“Why did you come by again?” she asked carefully.

Man, she really didn’t want to make it seem like she didn’t want Miss Rojas to show up to her apartment, because that wasn’t true, but she was just wholly confused right now.

“Right,” Miss Rojas shook her head. “I’m sorry, Kara, I haven’t even told you why I showed up in the first place.”

For the first time since Kara met the woman – which, granted, wasn’t that long ago – Miss Rojas looked a little uncomfortable. Flustered, even. She rubbed the back of her neck, and looked anywhere but at Kara.

Feeling her friends’ eyes on her back, Kara knew she had to find a way to make this situation a little more bearable for the business woman.

“Would you like to step into the hallway?” Kara suggested.

“That would be nice,” Miss Rojas replied gratefully, “thank you.”

“Of course,” Kara waited until the woman had stepped into the hallway to turn around and grab the doorknob. In doing so, she caught a glimpse of the scene in her own apartment. Her friends were all cramped around her kitchen island various uncomfortable positions, leaning over the countertop as far as they possibly could, shamelessly trying to get a good look at what was going on in the doorway. They weren’t even being subtle about it. The conversation had ceased completely, Kara was pretty sure Sam was pouring wine into her soda glass – her eyes trained on the door – and Alex’s hand was covering Brainy’s mouth, presumingly because his talking drowned out the sound of Kara and Miss Rojas’ conversation.

Even Nia, _Nia_ , who’s supposed to be on her side – uh, hello, mentor? – had the audacity, to grab chips from a bowl, bringing them to her mouth without breaking her stare.

She shot them all an angry ‘ _really?’_ look, before she purposefully closed the door behind her, ignoring the many ‘ _no’s_ ’ she heard from her friends.

“So,” Kara quickly turned around when the lock clicked, her hair sweeping over her shoulders in a swift motion, “what can I help you with?”

Outside, with fewer eyes on her, Miss Rojas seemed to relax. Kara could see her shoulders lower the slightest bit, like she was letting the tension drain from her body.

Kara recognised the action. Lena always did the same when she came over to Kara’s after a long day at L-Corp. She would be uncomfortable for all of two seconds with the whole “ _I don’t want to be a bother_ ,” or “ _I didn’t even tell you I was dropping by,”_ and the most frequent one of all, “ _I’m such an inconvenience to you right now_.” Eventually though, Kara would convince the woman she loved having Lena here, and that if the other woman didn’t mind Kara doing laundry for a bit, she was welcome to stay and crash on her couch with a glass of wine. They could talk or watch a movie. Lena would gratefully accept, and minutes later she would be settled on her couch in borrowed sweats and one of Kara’s claimed sweaters that had the words ‘I’m soft, give me snuggles,’ on it. The second Lena would sit down on her couch, her shoulders would to that exact same thing, and her eyes would flutter close with a grateful smile. She would be completely relaxed. Kara would iron her shirts, and Lena would sip her wine, and they would talk, and to Kara, it was undoubtedly her version of heaven on earth.

Kara shook the thought away and focussed on Miss Rojas.

The woman looked gorgeous.

Her hair was curled slightly, and was up in a tousled-looking bun. It looked effortlessly messy, and Kara wondered why everytime she tried to shoot for a messy bun, her hair always came out looking more like a cornfield than anything else, while this woman looked like she’d just walked off a catwalk.

The woman was taller than Kara, but Kara wrote that off as a consequence of wearing those ridiculously high, black lace stilettos. From years of working for Miss Grant, Kara guessed they were Jimmy Choo’s.

Kara was once again blown away by how gorgeous this woman was. Her black suit made the woman look both powerful and feminine, in a way that Kara never knew was possible. She also blatantly ignored the “dress shirt” requirement of a suit, and wore nothing but a blazer and a creatively cut, soft-looking waistcoat to cover herself. It was very distracting really, Kara mused. She could almost see the frilly lines of a bra just –

Kara had to force her eyes upwards, her cheeks flushing red. She hoped Miss Rojas hadn’t seen her be so staggeringly unprofessional. Luckily for her, Miss Rojas seemed to be occupied by her own thoughts.

Kara looked up, and caught Miss Rojas’ eye.

“Well,” the woman started, “it all seems a bit silly, now that I’m actually here.”

Kara frowned. “How so?”

Miss Rojas sighed, and quickly glanced up, before she looked at Kara again.

“Remember when we met, last week?” the woman asked.

“Of course,” Kara nodded, flinching at the memory of how sick she’d been, and how awful she’d been feeling that day. It was a miracle she hadn’t fainted right at Miss Rojas’ feet right there and then, Kara realised. A shiver ran down her spine at the thought. That was at least one thing to be grateful for. She wouldn’t know how to get back from that one.

“Well,” Miss Rojas frowned, “I was under the impression that you were in a hurry to obtain an interview. I was kind of awaiting your call.”

The woman bit her lip, and Kara was momentarily confused.

Partly because of the red lip effectively trapped beneath pearly white teeth, full and mesmerising, and partly because… what the hell?

She knew why she was desperate to call Miss Rojas, she had a job to save, but why was Miss Rojas so upset about Kara not calling her? That made no sense. Miss Rojas had no interest in giving out interviews, Kara or CatCo. It seemed completely random.

“You… you were wondering why I, me – Kara – haven’t called… you, Miss Rojas?” Kara asked for clarification.

Miss Rojas seemed to stand a little taller now, a little more like the Miss Rojas Kara had encountered last week. Her back straightened and she raised a perfectly manicured eyebrow.

“Why yes,” she replied. “I though I made myself quite clear. I was very interested in receiving a call from you.”

Kara didn’t know what the woman was implying, but she was almost certain there was some sort of subtext in that sentence. She just didn’t know exactly what it was.

“Okay…” Kara said dumbly. “Well, I was planning to, but uhm,” she blushed a bit.

Her story was going to sound so stupid, and maybe Miss Rojas was going to laugh at her for fainting in a professional setting in front of all her fellow employees and her own freaking _boss_.

Kara decided that if Miss Rojas had the courage to come knock on her door with just the question of why she hadn’t called yet, Kara was brave enough to tell the embarrassing story.

“Well you see,” Kara said, shuffling a little bit from one foot to the other, “it seems that I caught something last week, some sort of bug.”

Kara decided that that was vague enough to imply just about any illness that could possibly land her in the hospital. She was completely clueless on what kinds of illnesses she could have possibly contracted, since she’d never caught them before.

“A bug?” Miss Rojas asked confused.

“Yes,” Kara said. “A bug.”

Please dear Rao, just go with it, Kara internally begged.

Miss Rojas looked a little taken aback, but to her credit, just shook her head, and with it, her confusion, away.

“Alright,” she said slowly. “What happened?”

Relieved, Kara continued. “Well, I sort of fainted at work on Friday,” she muttered, and looked at the floor to avoid catching Miss Rojas’ eye. “And then I guess I was taken to the hospital. I was only just released.”

Kara dared to look back up, and she was almost glad to do so. The woman’s eyes shone with empathy, worry and something that Kara couldn’t pinpoint, but made her insides feel warm and gooey.

“So you know,” she added awkwardly. “I totally forgot about work. Didn’t have a lot of time to schedule an interview while I was stuck to an IV.”

Her joke fell flat, but it didn’t really matter. Miss Rojas was looking at her like she was the most beautiful, fragile thing she’d ever seen, and it only worked to increase Kara’s confusion. Why was she looking at her like that? What could possibly merit such a strong reaction?

Suddenly, Miss Rojas stepped forward, and before she could register it, took Kara face in her hands.

Kara, for her part, almost felt like fainting again. The woman’s touch made her cheeks heat up instantly, and for a split second, she worried the other woman was going to be grossed out by how much she was blushing.

The woman’s cold fingers settled on her warm cheeks, her thumbs just barely grazing the corners of Kara’s lips.

She was so close, Kara could study every detail in those woman’s eyes. The blue-grey-ish colour was speckled with tiny flecks of green, a detail that completely entranced Kara for some reason.

“I am so sorry that that happened to you, Kara,” the older woman said, still cradling Kara’s face in her hands. Her warm breath touched Kara’s lips, and Kara felt intoxicated.

“Uh, thanks?” Kara said. She didn’t quite know what to do or how to react, since up close, she caught another whiff of Andrea Rojas’ perfume, and it send Kara straight to some kind of dreamy other world where everything was calm, and beautiful and nice and peaceful, and dear Rao, she never wanted to leave that magical place.

“I’m serious, my darling,” the woman urged. “I can’t apologise enough for coming down here to berate you – ”

“No it’s – wait, berate?”

“While I should have known you weren’t feeling well,” the woman said.

Kara went silent, and stared dumbly into Miss Rojas’ stupidly beautiful eyes.

“Uhu,”

“I have to admit I felt a bit… offended, that you didn’t call me back.”

“What?”

Kara was struggling to grasp anything the woman was saying at the moment.

Miss Rojas laughed, in a gorgeous, husky yet melodious way that made Kara want to listen to nothing else for the rest of the evening.

“It’s quite embarrassing,” the woman decided, still not removing her hands from Kara’s face, but Kara was starting to get more comfortable with the continued contact. In fact, it took all of her self-restraint to keep her from pressing her own hands to Miss Rojas’.

Her eyes sparkled and Kara was soaked up.

“What?” she asked breathlessly.

“Well, I must say you left quite an impression on me, the other night.”

“I did?”

Miss Rojas smile widened.

“You did. You were so determined, and beautiful… I must say I was very excited to get to know you.”

Kara’s mouth fell open slightly.

“I was anxiously awaiting your call because I was going to suggest doing the interview, well,” she laughed self-depreciatively. “Over dinner?” she added with a raised eyebrow.

“Huh?”

“Here I was thinking the pretty girl was going to call me, because she was obviously interested, and now I find out she was on the brink of death!”

“Well,” Kara interrupted, “death may be a little far-f – ”

“You were in the hospital!” Miss Rojas called out, and Kara quickly held her tongue. “And I thought you would call me for an interview, so I could ask you for a date.”

“You were – wait what?”

Miss Rojas stepped backwards, and let her hands drop to her side. Kara’s cheeks tingled from the loss she suddenly felt, and for some reason, she almost longed to place those hands back on her cheeks immediately.

“You were going to ask me out?” Kara asked softly.

“I thought it was obvious,” Miss Rojas said. “But I must’ve mistaken your flush for interest. I really do apologise,” the woman said honestly. “You were just trying to do your job, and I made things complicated. I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable. I guess I just misread the signs.”

She took another step back, and Kara didn’t know what was happening anymore. Date? Flush? Signs? What?

Miss Rojas scraped her throat. “I would appreciate it if you left that detail out of your interview,” she stated calmly. “It would be quite an embarrassment to me and the board to know that I was trying to seduce a young reporter.”

She raised an eyebrow.

“I can’t believe I told you about how reporters turn everything into a dirty drama for others to read, and inadvertently did the exact thing I was afraid of all by myself.”

She stood up straight again, and pulled at her blazer.

“Well,” she said, “I truly am sorry for having bothered you. I’ll be going now.”

Kara watched the other woman turn on her heel to walk away, and she could only follow those click-clack footsteps with her eyes until she suddenly snapped out of her trance.

“Miss Rojas,” Kara called out, going after the woman. “Wait!”

Miss Rojas turned so quickly, that Kara basically bumped into her. She would’ve fallen flat on her ass if Miss Rojas’ hands hadn’t shot out to steady her.

“Are you alr – ”

“I didn’t know!” Kara burst out.

Miss Rojas raised her eyebrows until they were almost touching her hairline.

“I’m sorry?” she asked.

“I didn’t know you wanted me to go on a date with you!” Kara flushed.

The other woman made an ‘ah’ sound, but refrained from coming any closer.

“I never would have made that assumption,” Kara hurriedly tried to clarify. “You’re,” she waved her hand in the air in front of Miss Rojas, “you. And I’m just me. How could I have ever thought you were interested in me?”

“Kara,” the woman said with a confused smile, “I gave you my number.”

“On a business card!” Kara exclaimed.

“My darling,” the woman laughed, “I gave you my card – which I never do by the way – and then asked you to _call_ me.”

She raised an eyebrow.

“You think I tell just anyone to do that?”

Kara deflated a bit.

“No?” she asked hesitantly.

Miss Rojas laughed.

“It’s alright, dear. You don’t have to feel bad about it. I shot my shot, and it didn’t work out.”

She shrugged.

“It happens. I’m a big girl,” she winked, “I’ll get over it.”

She stepped back, and smiled.

“Don’t worry, you’ll still have your interview,” she promised. “I won’t let my horrid gaydar ruin your job.”

Kara nodded mindlessly.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

Miss Rojas only smiled in response.

“I’ll let you go now,” the woman said. “I think your companions aren’t too pleased with me having stolen you from them,” she added cheekily.

Kara blushed.

“They’ll be fine.”

An awkward silence fell over them.

Kara didn’t know what to say, but her mind was going at the speed of light, trying to come up with a reason for the other woman to stay just a little longer. She didn’t know why, but she craved her company, and she wanted so badly for the other woman to stay. Maybe it was because she associated the woman with being so kind and nice at a time when everybody else was so cruel. But this strange woman seemed like a breath of fresh air. Like something good and comforting. Kara didn’t know her at all, and yet she wanted to be with her so badly.

Or maybe it was the fact that this woman had come here unannounced because she was worried about Kara not calling her, because she had actively been waiting for a phone call. She had wanted to see Kara. She came all this way, for her. Kara felt wanted, she felt appreciated. But most of all, she felt special. Special, because this woman, this rich, successful, elusive Andrea Rojas, had picked her of all people to want to be around. She’d picked her to ask on a date. And Kara wanted all of that attention, and more.

Unfortunately for Kara, Miss Rojas seemed to have decided that their conversation had had its course. She scraped her throat.

“Well, please set up an interview with my assistant, then,” she smiled. “I promise she won’t leave you hanging this time around,” she joked.

“Wait!” Kara called out again, before the other woman had even had a chance to turn around.

The woman looked at her expectantly, and Kara internally cursed herself. She had to stop calling out whatever before she even knew what she wanted to say. It was getting really, really embarrassing.

“Yes?” Miss Rojas asked.

“Uh,” Kara said.

Miss Rojas softened a bit.

“Is there something I can do for you?”

Kara was drawing a blank, but she didn’t know what to say or do. So she decided to try a new approach. Brutal honesty.

“I don’t know why I said wait,” Kara admitted.

Miss Rojas arched an eyebrow, but didn’t interrupt.

“I said it, and I don’t know why. I – I don’t know what to say to make you stay,” Kara said fumbling with her fingers. “Because I want you to. Stay, that is,”

The look on Miss Rojas’ face was inscrutable. Kara couldn’t guess what that woman was thinking for the life of her, and it was making her feel so stupid.

“I know that doesn’t really make sense. It doesn’t to me. But, I really want you to stay. I just don’t know why or how – I-I”

She fell silent.

“I just want – ”

Kara didn’t get to say what she wanted in the end, because Miss Rojas looked at her with something akin to heat in her eyes. Some sparkling, unwavering attention, and a sudden understanding of something.

She slowly placed her purse on the floor, and slowly but determinately strode towards Kara. Kara held her breath with every step Miss Rojas took, and leaned against the wall behind her for some sort of support. She placed both of her hands flat against the white brick, and waited.

In mere seconds, Miss Rojas had crossed the few steps between them, and stood in front of Kara.

Kara looked up, and caught Miss Rojas’ eye.

Her entire body was on fire. She couldn’t focus on anything. All her senses were overwhelmed in a way that she’d only ever experienced when she had her powers. She could feel the cold of the stone through her hands, she could hear her own breathing loud in her ears and her heart was beating a mile a minute. If she weren’t pinned down by Miss Rojas’ look, Kara might’ve felt the need to jump, run, fly, anything to cope with this overload of sensations. But she stayed. She stayed because the other woman had too. Because something was going to happen, and Kara didn’t what it was, but she just knew she wanted it to happen.

Miss Rojas didn’t say a word, but she reached out a hand, and cupped Kara’s cheek with one cool hand.

She slowly inched closer, giving Kara every place and all the time to stop her, to tell her to wait, to slow down, but Kara didn’t stop. She didn’t want to.

Miss Rojas’ breath was warm on her lips. For just a split second, Kara bemoaned the fact that the woman’s breath was minty and fresh, while hers was probably smelling like pizza and cheese puffs. That thought quickly went out the window though, when she felt the brush of the other woman’s nose against her own.

Miss Rojas paused her descent just centimetres from Kara’s lips. She was giving Kara final way out.

But Kara didn’t want it.

This was insane. This was crazy. She was delirious. She should go back inside, let Miss Rojas leave, and never think of this again. This was insane, insane, _insane_!

Kara ignored all of the thoughts racing through her head, and let herself take control.

She leaned up, grasped the corner of Miss Rojas’ suit jacket, and crossed the short distance herself.

Kara pressed her lips against Miss Rojas’ with just the tiniest amount of pressure. Rao, her lips were soft, pillowy. Full enough to make all of it feel like a dream. The pressure was close to non-existent, but Rao, the contact was indescribable. Maybe it was because she hadn’t been kissed for so long, or maybe it was the thrall of kissing a total stranger; but she felt like she never wanted to stop kissing this woman ever again.

Caught up in her own feverish want for the other woman, Kara was unable to tell whether or not Miss Rojas was actually kissing her back. The pressure was so slight, the other woman’s movement against her lips could’ve just been an involuntary movement.

Kara hesitated. Should she stop? Fall back?

Just when she wanted to bow her head and break the kiss, Miss Rojas moaned. _Moaned_. The sound vibrated against Kara, and her body seemed to react to it on instinct. She brought her left hand to Miss Rojas’ shoulder, trying to get the woman even closer.

Miss Rojas seemed to agree on the issue. She tightened her grip on Kara’s face, as she pressed harder against her lips. They kissed slowly, fiercely. Miss Rojas pressed a series of quick, furtive kisses on Kara’s lips, before darting out her tongue to trace Kara’s underlip.

That seemed to ignite something within her, and Kara actually moaned out loud.

Kara responded by leaning closer, and kissing the woman’s lips again, and again, until a lack of oxygen finally drove her to stop.

She pushed Miss Rojas away with the tiniest bit of pressure, and Miss Rojas immediately complied with the unspoken wish.

They broke apart, and Miss Rojas cleared her throat, taking a step back.

Kara tucked her hair behind her ears, pushed her glasses up her nose, and felt a blush high on her cheeks.

Which made absolutely no sense to her. She’d just kissed a woman she’d only met twice, in a hallway like some kind of teenager afraid to get caught by her parents, and now, _after_ , she was blushing?

Luckily, when she looked up, Miss Rojas seemed to be in a similar sort of predicament. Her hair was a little mussed, her bun not as organised as it was minutes ago. Her high cheekbones were dusted with just the tiniest bit of pink, and Kara’s heart swelled at the sight.

When their eyes caught, Kara couldn’t help but chuckle nervously. Miss Rojas hesitated for just a second, before laughing too.

“I’m sorry,” Kara said, “I promise I don’t usually do that.”

“Do what?” Miss Rojas teased.

“Kiss strangers in my hallway,” Kara blushed.

“Oh,” Miss Rojas took a tiny step forward. “Are we still strangers then?”

Kara laughed in disbelief. “I don’t really know you,” she replied. “That does seem to be the definition of a stranger.”

Miss Rojas nodded thoughtfully.

“So you don’t usually attack people you don’t really know with your lips?” she asked seriously.

“Excuse you,” Kara laughed, “I think you did a fair part of the attacking yourself.”

Miss Rojas laughed too.

“That is true.”

She smiled warmly, and Kara realised she could learn to adore that smile. It was so open, so free, so careless.

“So if I wanted to kiss you again,” the older woman inquired with an arched eyebrow, “we would have to _not_ be strangers anymore, according to you. Is that it?”

Kara blushed.

“That would be preferable, yes.”

“Well in that case.”

The woman stretched out her hand.

“Kara Danvers,” she asked solemnly, “how would you feel if I took you out to dinner, and you could ask me all your interview questions so we could get to know each other and not be strangers anymore?”

Kara grinned. “I’d like that very much.”

“Fantastic,” Miss Rojas said with a broad smile. “Give me your phone,” she asked firmly.

Kara saw no need to disagree, and handed it over.

Miss Rojas smiled while typing something down. She handed the phone back when she was done, and said: “I just typed in my number. Send me a message so I have yours too.”

Kara complied, and wrote her name with a simple smiley face in a text to a number now labelled: Andrea ‘NotAStranger’ Rojas.

A ping let her know the message had arrived, and Miss Rojas saved her number with a smile.

“See,” she said, “now I have your number. I’ll call you, and I’ll set up an interview, because I have zero faith in your calling abilities.”

“Hey,” Kara said, but she was smiling all the same.

“And then we’ll have our date,” Miss Rojas whispered.

“A date,” Kara reiterated with a blush.

They stood there, standing in the hallway for some time, smiling like two fools with nothing better to do on a Sunday evening.

They were interrupted when they heard a loud bang, followed by some sort of glass breaking in the apartment behind Kara.

“I guess I’d better let you go back to your friends before they start wondering if I’ve abducted you,” Miss Rojas said with an arched eyebrow.

“I guess,” Kara agreed reluctantly.

Why did that surprise party have to be tonight? She wanted to talk more, she wanted to learn more about Miss Rojas. The woman was amazing, alluring, powerful and sweet, and Kara wanted to set her down on her couch and admire and listen to her for hours on end.

Miss Rojas seemed to read her mind. Or maybe Kara’s insecurities were just that clear to be read on her face.

“Hey,” Miss Rojas said softly, “I promise you, I’ll make time for you as soon as possible, my darling.”

Kara nodded, but she could feel a pang in her chest. _What if she didn’t_?

“Hey,” Miss Rojas had stepped closer, and stroked Kara’s cheek with her thumb. “I’m really looking forward to our date,” she whispered, and Kara smiled.

“I want to get to know you, Kara,” she added in a more serious tone. “And I’m not one to let go of things that interest me.”

Kara nodded, and Miss Rojas pressed a chaste kiss to her cheek.

“I want to kiss you again as soon as possible too, by the way,” the woman stated matter-of-factly, “which makes for a fantastic incentive to hurry this date along.”

Kara let out a laugh.

“Okay,” she whispered.

“I really do have to go now, my darling,” she said, “but I will see you soon.”

She picked up her purse from where she’d dropped it earlier on – Kara blushed at the memory.

“Okay,” Kara said again.

“Goodbye Kara,” Miss Rojas said warmly.

“Goodbye, Miss Rojas,” Kara smiled.

“Kara,” the woman deadpanned, “as a rule, I let the people who kiss me call me by my first name.”

Kara laughed.

Then, a wicked expression appeared on Andrea’s face.

“Unless you’re into that sort of thing, of course,” she added innocently.

This time, Kara’s flush extended to the tips of ears, and Andrea let out a loud laugh at the sight.

“Andrea it is,” Kara muttered.

Andrea smiled again, that warm, beautiful, soft smile that made Kara’s head go fuzzy.

“I’ll see you soon, my darling.”

Andrea Rojas turned on her heel, and turned the corner to go down the stairs, effectively obscuring herself from Kara’s eyesight.

Kara waited until she couldn’t hear Andrea’s footsteps anymore. She took a second to regain her bearings, to think about what just happened.

Andrea Rojas had come all this way to see her. She wanted to meet up with Kara. She had wanted to ask Kara out on a date. A _date_. And Andrea had kissed her! They’d kissed! Like full on, total make-out kissing in a freaking hallway!

Kara blushed when she recalled that Miss Rojas – Andrea, she thought happily – had implied that she wanted to do it again.

Kara’s lips already tingled at the thought. She didn’t think she’d mind being kissed by Andrea again. Not at all, in fact.

She allowed herself one last, gigantic grin and a tiny squeal, before she stood up straight, smoothed her sweater and ran a hand through her hair.

She was ready to face her friends again.

With that, she turned around, and turned the doorknob to her apartment.

The second the door opened though, Kara was bombarded by the noise in the room.

“There’s no way that woman is trying to get Kara to come work for her, come up with a better hypothesis!” she heard her sister slur.

“Oh yeah?” James replied. “Better than: the woman’s an alien hunter who’s trying to capture Kara, really?”

“Uh, duh!” Alex said, dangerously dangling her beer bottle from her right hand.

“Alright kids, let’s calm down,” Sam interrupted, taking Alex’s bottle from her hand and switching it with a piece of pizza.

That did seem to appease Alex, because she took a bite, and was momentarily distracted.

“You’re all wrong,” Nia called out, “Kara’s obviously in the middle of an interview right this second!”

“But then why would she have shown up at an interviewer’s door?” Lena asked, just as caught up in the debate as the others.

“Because Rojas is illusive and distrusting,” Nia said in a _duh_ tone. “She obviously doesn’t trust Kara to do the interview in her office, where there’s tons of delicate information. So, she came here to make sure that the interview would be unexpected, that way it would happen on her own terms.”

Lena nodded thoughtfully. “That seems a little paranoid,” she threw Nia a pointed look, “and that’s coming from me.”

Nia frowned. “You’ve got me there,” she mumbled, and went back to mulling over her options.

Brainy walked away from the fridge, a fresh glass of juice in his hand, and he noticed Kara standing by the door, still trying to decide whether to become mad, or just to laugh at her friends’ ridiculous antics.

Brainy pointed at Kara.

“Instead of formulating many fallacious hypotheses, why not just ask one of the parties involved?”

Kara only had a second to close her eyes and rethink her choices in friends, before the others followed the direction of Brainy’s finger, and noticed Kara.

“Kara!” at least five voices rang out.

Kara waved awkwardly. “I’m back.”

She shuffled over to the kitchen island, where her friends were impatiently awaiting her arrival, like predators waiting for their prey to come close enough to be bitten. Close enough to be attacked. Which was exactly the position Kara was in right now.

But she wouldn’t go down without a fight.

“So, what did I miss in here?” she asked casually, taking the last piece of pizza from the cardboard box. “Did I hear something break? Where’s Ruby, by the way?”

Kara arched her neck but couldn’t see the girl anywhere.

“Did I miss anything important?” she asked innocently.

Unfortunately, Alex and Nia were like dogs with a bone.

“Just us trying to figure out why Miss Rojas came to see you. We also started a short bet. Sam drank coke with wine and sprayed it everywhere. Alex got drunk. She dropped three of your plates, but somehow only managed to break one. And a wine glass. She also knocked over a lamp. Ruby got tired around eleven. She didn’t want to go home yet. Sam and Lena tucked her into your bed. We figured you’d be fine with it. She’s been asleep for about an hour now. You didn’t miss anything important, now spill!”

Kara was taken aback by Nia’s heated rambling.

She looked around, and saw that everybody was leaning in. They all wanted to know what had just gone down. Even Lena, who had been trying to look disinterested the entire evening, was gripping her wine glass, intently staring at the wine bottle, obviously waiting for Kara’s speech.

Kara caught Sam’s eye. Sam, who at least had the courtesy to look a bit apologetic, but was just as desperate to find out what happened.

Kara sighed; realising there was no escaping her inevitable confession.

“Fine,” she said reluctantly.

Alex cheered silently, and rounded the table to lean against Kara.

“Tell us,” she drawled, and Kara had to turn her head to avoid the thick scent of scotch and beer coming her way.

“Oh my God, Alex, how much have you had to drink?” she asked waving the scent away with a disgusted expression on her face.

“I don’t know, a lot?” Alex said impatiently. “Stop stalling and tell me!”

Kara rolled her eyes, but agreed anyway. She quickly explained what had gone down in short, undetailed sentences, keeping everybody’s attention firmly on her.

“And then, uh,” Kara hesitated.

Should she tell them? It felt more like her own personal secret. Did she want to share it with others already? It felt so fresh, so new.

Then again, they were her friends. Kara heard about James and Lena’s kiss from Lena before it had even taken place. That’s how close they were.

Taking a decision, she took a deep breath before continuing.

“And then we kissed.”

* * *

It had taken a while for things to calm down after that.

Alex had freaked out the most. She’d ranted about consent, lesbians – temporarily forgetting she was one herself – inappropriate C.E.O.’s – with a deadly glare pointed Lena’s way – the ethics of seducing reporters, and the integrity of the media being compromised by said inappropriate C.E.O. lesbians.

When all of that was done, and after Kara had calmly waited to explain that, yes, she’d wanted the kiss, and that yes, it had all been very consensual, Alex launched into her second rant. This time, her rant covered the fact that small-minded towns like Midvale enforced a heteronormative idea of society, which in turn caused both Kara and herself to discover their sexual identities way later in life.

Kara just nodded along to her sister’s drunken angry rant, deciding that tonight was not the night to say that she’d been pretty sure she liked women all her life, but had just never really acted on it.

Sam had asked her if it really was all consensual, and when Kara had answered in the affirmative, she’d smiled a small, almost sisterly smile, and congratulated Kara.

James was happy as well, although he did see the whole date-ordeal as a way for CatCo to be the first to publish a very comprehensive article on Andrea Rojas, an article which would surely launch them to the top. Kara didn’t agree with him, but was too tired to fight that fight that evening.

Nia was all over the place, asking for more details, which Kara only gave out sparsely, to Nia’s great frustration. She was happy, obviously, but just like Alex, she pondered on the ethics of the whole situation, albeit in a more concise and comprehendible way.

Brainy nodded along to most of it. He didn’t really have a grasp on the whole dating thing yet, his only source of knowledge being Nia, and a lot of old CatCo articles Kara had considerately donated to him.

Lena had stayed oddly quiet during the whole ordeal. She didn’t utter a word, and didn’t even look at Kara. She hadn’t even sipped her wine in a while.

Kara wondered if it had something to do with the fact that the name ‘Andrea Rojas’ was basically poison between the two of them. She almost flinched at the memory of Lena enouncing the name. It had been uttered in a sad, painful, hurtful context, and try as she might; Kara couldn’t forget how it had felt.

She promised herself she’d talk to Lena about it later. But right now, she was exhausted.

The others too, it seems. Alex was swaying on her feet, but Kara guessed that was just the alcohol. One by one, the others trickled out of her apartment, thanking her for an amazing night, and promising to organise another one soon.

Alex had, at one point, fallen asleep on Kara’s couch, and hadn’t moved in over half an hour. Sam, sweet, considerate Sam helped with the clean up, despite all of Kara’s objections.

“I made the mess, Kara. What kind of mother would I be if I taught my child that it’s okay not to clean up after yourself?”

Kara couldn’t argue with that logic, and started cleaning up beside her. Lena, too, had stood up, and was currently gathering glasses that were strewn all over the apartment. They were the last ones left.

“I can’t thank you enough for this party,” Kara said after a while, drying the dishes as Sam was washing them.

Sam smiled sweetly at her. “It was nothing, really,” Sam said. “I loved every minute of it. Ruby too. She missed you guys a lot.”

Kara looked affectionately in the direction of her bedroom.

“We missed her too. Alex especially. I think she had a hard time seeing you guys leave town.”

Sam nodded. “So did we, believe me. But I – we, had to get out of National City for a while,” a pained expression crossed her face. “We needed a bit of a break.”

Kara nodded emphatically. “Of course,” she whispered. “I understand. Glad to have you back, though,” she added with a smile.

Sam tilted her head to look at Kara and smiled back. “We’re thinking of staying this time. We decided we want to be with family.”

Kara smiled warmly.

“This party just confirmed it, really,” Sam said, cleaning a wine glass. “It felt good to be at a family party again.”

She smiled softly to herself.

“I’m glad I was invited.”

“Of course you were,” Kara said softly. “We wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.”

Sam smiled softly, but Kara could see a crack in her façade. When Sam turned to go back to cleaning a plate with a small sponge, Kara put down her kitchen towel.

“Is everything alright, Sam?” Kara asked carefully. “I know we haven’t had a lot of time to talk tonight, but… is there something bothering you?”

Sam stopped wiping the plate. She stared ahead for a few seconds, before clenching her eyes shut. She seemed to count till three, before she turned to face Kara again.

“It’s not me. It’s you.”

“Excuse me?” Kara asked shocked.

“No, no, not like that.”

Sam frowned and closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose.

When she opened her eyes again, Kara saw they were hurt, scared.

“Sam,”

“Why aren’t you yelling at me?”

“Excuse me?” Kara asked.

“You’re – you’re Supergirl!” Sam whispered loudly. “You’re Supergirl!”

Kara nodded self-consciously.

“Are you – is that something that bothers you?” she asked softly, trying not to sound too hurt.

“No! Ugh!”

Kara waited patiently while Sam tried to gather her thoughts to make them into a sound argument.

“Okay,” she tried again after a beat. “I know I’m probably the last person you wanted to have been entrusted with your secret.”

“That’s not – ”

“Kara,” Sam said seriously, “I saw what Reign – what I did to Supergirl. There’s video’s all over the internet of _me_ ,” she emphasised, “throwing a bloodied Supergirl off of a rooftop.”

Kara made a short ‘ah’ sound, but didn’t interrupt.

“I mean, what kind of monster does that? Jesus Christ, Kara, I put you in a coma!” Sam said, loud enough for Lena to turn her head their way.

“God,” Sam buried her face in her hands. “How can you not hate me for what I did to you. It’s tantamount to torture, Kara. Forgiveness is one thing, but having that person re-enter your life? That’s too much to ask from anyone.”

Kara nodded slowly. Then, she took Sam by her shoulders and pulled her into a hug. Sam was taken aback at first, her whole body tensing up. She even dropped the plate back into the dirty water, splashing the mixture of soap and water all over Kara’s kitchen.

Kara wrapped her arms around Sam’s neck, and rested her head right under Sam’s chin.

“You’re my family, Sam. I know it wasn’t you. We all do,” she said simply. “I can’t judge Alex for the things she did when she was under Myriad, I certainly won’t judge you for Reign’s actions.”

She felt Sam whimper above her, but didn’t let go.

“Would you judge me for Red Daughter’s actions?” she asked against Sam’s shoulder.

She heard a muffled sob, and then two solid, powerful arms wrapped around her waist, and pulled her closer.

“No,” she heard. “Of course I wouldn’t.”

Kara smiled. “See,” she spoke up, “well there you have it. No blame at all.”

Kara stepped back, and let Sam wipe away some stray tears.

“But the pain,” Sam muttered.

Kara silenced her with a short shake of her head.

“It wasn’t the first time someone threw me off a building, and it certainly won’t be the last. The one thing you bruised was my ego, and that certainly needed to be brought down a notch,” she joked.

Sam laughed a little through her tears, but she nodded.

“Okay,” she said.

Sam awkwardly dried her tears.

“Wanna go back to doing the dishes?” Kara asked sweetly.

Sam smiled. “Please.”

It took another few minutes, but with the three of them working together – Lena ridding the living room of food, dishes and rearranging whatever furniture had fallen victim to the party, while Sam and Kara did the dishes – the apartment was once again spotless.

“Alright,” Kara said, throwing her kitchen towel in her dirty clothing hamper, “that’s it.”

“Great,” Sam said. “I’ll wake up Lena and drive everybody home.”

“Are you sure?” Kara asked. “Because Alex can crash on my couch, and I can call you a cab?”

Sam shook her head with a smile.

“It’s fine, Kara,” she said. “I drove here, and I only had one terrible glass of wine,” she winked. “I’ll drop Lena and Alex off at their places.”

“Okay.”

Kara and Sam went to wake up Alex and Ruby respectively. Somehow, the two girls looked exactly the same when woken up in the middle of the night. Irritated, with eyes clenched shut to avoid the light, and hair sticking up in different places. They both grumbled in the exact same way too.

Sam and Kara exchanged amused glances over their heads.

Kara dressed Alex in her black leather jacket while Sam did the same for Ruby with her brightly coloured jacket. She kissed Alex’ cheek – Alex making her promise that they would talk about Andrea later, when Alex had sobered up – and hugged Ruby. The girl’s enthusiasm had tempered down a lot after having been woken up by her mother, so the hug was mostly a one-armed attempt on Kara’s part.

Sam, however, hugged her close, whispering another thank you in her ear, before letting her go with a smile.

That only left Kara and Lena.

Lena had put her coat on, a beautiful black one, with fur around her neck, and she had a firm grip on her clutch. She was ready to leave.

Kara didn’t really know what to do. A hug wasn’t in the cards – she hadn’t forgotten how Lena had flinched away from her when she found out about Kara’s identity – but shaking each other’s hands was just a terrible thought altogether, and would hurt even more.

Clearly, Lena was thinking the same thing, because she was awkwardly rubbing her arm with one hand, while looking at the floor.

“So,” Kara tried, “thanks for coming.”

Lena gave a small smile.

“It meant a lot to me that you would show up here.”

“It meant a lot to me that you didn’t turn me away,” Lena responded softly. “Even after all the shit I put you through.”

Kara nodded.

“Never,” she whispered.

Lena smiled, but it was short, forced.

“Lena – ”

“We’ll talk soon, okay?” Lena asked.

Before Kara even had the time to answer, she’d already rushed past Kara, and joined the others at the door.

Kara frowned. Lena’s behaviour hurt. Although this was probably the best reaction she could’ve hoped for – she did say they would talk soon – it still felt awkward and distant somehow. It felt unnatural.

Sam threw her another final smile, as if she could tell Kara needed it, and then she closed the door behind her.

* * *

Lena leaned against window of Sam’s car, watching the buildings and other cars pass by, as they silently drove through the rain to Alex’s apartment. The clock on the car’s dashboard read 1:09. They’d stayed far longer than they had anticipated. Ruby and Alex were both out cold in the backseat, having fallen asleep in no less than four minutes after they’d gotten into the car.

Sam drove meticulously, carefully, making the ride as comfortable as possible. Lena knew she hated driving in the rain. She probably knew all the statistics indicating how many more people got into car accidents in the rain than when the sun was out.

Sam was a careful person. She looked twice before crossing a street. She checked the ingredients on every packaged item of food she bought. She watched her back. She was careful.

She didn’t used to be.

Lena still remembered how Sam used to go on binge-drinking nights in college, and leave parties with complete and utter strangers. She once watched the woman do a handstand, drunk, on the roof of a building, far too close to the edge for comfort.

That all changed when she had Ruby. She matured ten years in only nine months, and Lena had sat back and looked in awe as Sam perfected the role of a mother, without even having one herself to support her. She watched as Sam learned how to tap and store milk and how to calm down a fussy baby. She watched how Sam took night classes with Ruby asleep in the baby carrier next to her. How she worked her ass off trying to provide for her daughter, refusing to take hand-outs, and only letting Lena babysit when she could prove she didn’t have early morning classes, just so Sam could get some rest.

Sam had grown into motherhood in an organic, beautiful, awe-inspiring way that still baffled and touched Lena immensely. But unfortunately – or fortunately, depending on the day – that motherhood hadn’t just stopped with Ruby. It had extended to Sam taking care of everyone she loved in her life. That meant Lena too.

So while Lena was trying very hard to just focus on the rain tapping against her window, and the vague forms of cars passing by, she could feel Sam’s concerned eyes on her.

Careful Sam, taking her eyes off the road when it was actually raining, just to check on her. It was driving her insane.

Sam never took her eyes off the road when it was raining.

“Lena – ”

“I’m fine.”

There was silence again. The radio wasn’t even playing to absorb a bit of the tension in the car.

“You’re not, though,” Sam said after a beat.

Lena clenched her jaw, and pointedly ignored Sam.

“Lena – ”

“What?” Lena hissed, turning to face Sam.

Sam looked taken aback, before she turned back to face the road, a hurt expression on her face.

Lena sighed. _God damnit_.

“I’m fine,” she repeated, softer this time.

Sam didn’t take her eyes off the road.

“You’re not,” she whispered softly in response.

Lena didn’t know how to answer that.

“Kara kissed someone.”

“Stop.”

“Lena – ”

“I’m serious, Sam. Stay out of it.”

“Did you tell her?”

“No.”

Now it was Sam’s turn to sigh.

“Lena – ”

“Please, Sam,” Lena begged.

This time, she did turn to face Sam.

“Please don’t make me go there, okay? There’s enough hurt already. Things are already complicated enough. I can’t – ”

Lena covered her mouth with a trembling hand.

“Lena – ”

“No, Sam I don’t want to – ”

“Shut up,” Sam cut her off, to Lena’s eye-widening surprise. “Shut up, and let me talk for a minute.”

Sam was holding the stearin wheel so tightly her knuckles had gone white.

“I know you don’t want to hear it, but I’m going to tell you anyway.”

Sam didn’t sound like she needed any sort of agreement, but Lena nodded anyway. Pettily, as if to show she still held some sort of control over the situation.

“You like Kara,”

Lena scoffed.

“Don’t interrupt me, Luthor,” Sam warned, and Lena shrank back a little in her carseat.

“I don’t get you,” Sam said plainly. “So help me out here, because I haven’t understood what has been going on for a long time.

Lena bit her lip.

“Lena,” Sam said, swerving the car to head onto Leafland Street. “You’ve loved Kara since the day she came into your life. Whether that’s as a friend or something more is up to you to decide. All I know is, less than a year ago, you crashed my house more drunk than I’ve ever seen you, and all you talked about all night was how much you loved Kara. How you were convinced she was the best thing that ever happened to you. You told me you spent more time with her than with James, and that you preferred it that way. You _said_ ,” Sam stressed, “that you’ve never felt better than when you and Kara were hanging out alone, having dinner, and falling asleep in her apartment.”

“I was happy she was my friend. I love my _friend_ ,” Lena bit back in retort.

Sam threw her a look that said she didn’t buy any of it.

“Then,” she continued, pointedly ignoring Lena’s previous remark, “not even two weeks later, I hear you’ve gotten back together with James, as if nothing happened. And I was disappointed. Because I thought you were Lena Luthor. You go for what you want. And you want Kara.”

“God, Sam,” Lena spat out indignantly. “I was sad! James had been giving me the cold shoulder for weeks! I was upset, and lonely, and I needed someone! So I might have oversold my love for Kara a bit, but that doesn’t mean anything.”

“So,” Sam deadpanned, “you were so lonely and upset, anybody could’ve been considered as a potential lover in that alcohol-soaked brain of yours, is that it?”

“Yes,” Lena said confidently.

“Okay. So it could’ve been me too, then?” Sam said seriously.

Lena grimaced.

“That’s what I thought,” Sam said with enough self-satisfaction to make Lena’s blood boil.

“You like Kara, you like her as more of a friend. You like her more than you probably should, and we agreed that night, _we_ _agreed_ ,” she stressed, “that we would be honest to the people around us about our feelings, right?” she warned. “I was under the impression that you were going to go straight to Kara and tell her how you felt.”

“That was before,” Lena responded.

“Before what?”

“Before!” Lena called out as loud as she dared, trying not to wake the girls in the backseat. “Before, when I was drunk, and lonely, and when my relationship with James was on the rocks! I didn’t know what I was feeling, so let it go!”

Sam stopped before a red light, and turned to Lena. She looked sad. No, not sad. She looked at Lena with pity in her eyes.

Lena couldn’t stand pity. She didn’t want it, and she certainly didn’t need it.

“I think you knew very well what you were saying that night. I think you really do love Kara.”

Lena scoffed, and turned back to the carwindow, looking out at the shops and houses to their right.

“Lena,” Sam said, softer this time. “Can you honestly tell me right now that you don’t feel anything for Kara. Nothing more than just basic friendship?”

Lena stayed silent.

But her silence was an answer in and on itself, and Sam knew that very well.”

“Okay,” Sam whispered finally. “Do you want to know what I think?”

Lena shrugged petulantly.

“I think, you’ve loved Kara for a very long time.”

Lena bit her lip. She didn’t want to think about this. She didn’t want to hear any of it.

“I also think that you were scared,” Sam continued, keeping her eyes on the road. “Kara was the first, real and genuine friendship you had after the Lex ordeal, and she was so kind to you that you were scared to mess it up. You didn’t want to lose it. Am I warm?”

Lena clenched her jaw, but gave an almost imperceptible nod nonetheless.

Sam nodded.

“I think, you’ve been looking for an excuse not to date her for years. I think you’ve tried to think of every possible angle, just so you could tell yourself you did a good thing by not asking her out on a real date.”

“Okay, hey now,” Lena interrupted.

“And I think,” Sam continued, “that finding out that Kara was Supergirl was a blessing to you.”

“That is not – ”

“Because then,” Sam continued, “she was an alien.”

“I am not my family,” Lena was angry now too. “I’m not that shallow. I don’t care – ”

“No, but they have everything to do with this anyway, don’t they?”

Lena shook her head. “What?” she asked confused.

“Finding out she lied to you, finding out that you two were really incompatible because of the whole ‘Luthor-Super’ conflict,” Sam rolled her eyes, “that allowed you to justify not dating her. It gave you an out.”

“You’re being ridiculous,” Lena decided, and angrily turned to the carwindow again.

“No,” Sam argued, “I’m not. You have feelings for Kara, but now that you’ve found out she’s Supergirl, you’re repressing them again.”

“I am not repressing anything,” Lena said heatedly.

“Ha,” Sam laughed, “not repressing anything, my ass!”

Lena shook her head. She didn’t want to hear it. She didn’t want to hear any of it.

“You could just barely admit to me and yourself that you loved Kara after you’d consumed a shelf of whiskey. You’re the queen of repressing your emotions. You can’t handle your love for her, so you use the Supergirl thing as a moronic excuse.”

Lena was so angry she couldn’t utter a single word.

But Sam wasn’t done.

“You’re telling me, that that love, that,” Sam huffed trying to find the right word, “overload of emotions, suddenly stopped when you found out she was Supergirl?”

Sam shook her head.

“I don’t believe that. And neither do you,” she pointed out. “You just like to pretend you do. You like to yell at Kara, and hate yourself after for hurting her. Because you still care. Because you still love her. And I can see that even more clearly after tonight.”

“You’re wrong, you – ”

“If you really didn’t love her, like you claim, you wouldn’t have driven to the hospital with her. You wouldn’t have shown up to the party tonight.”

“Alex asked me t – ”

“Yes, because you always do what Alex asks you to do,” Sam deadpanned.

Lena bit her tongue.

“If you didn’t care so much for her, you wouldn’t have looked so absolutely stricken after Kara told us she’d kissed that woman.”

Lena’s felt her heart fall. God, she didn’t want to think about Andrea _fucking_ Rojas. And she certainly didn’t want to think about that woman and Kara kissing. It made her sick to her stomach.

“Let’s face it Lena,” Sam said, a lot softer now, “you care about her. And you messed things up. You’ve hidden your emotions for so long, and now things have fallen apart. I could see it on your face.”

Lena shook her head.

“Stop it, Sam,” she warned.

“I bet you didn’t think it would happen. That she would kiss someone else. You weren’t counting on it to happen.”

Lena huffed. “Of course it could happen, she’s a beautiful woman.”

“Exactly,” Sam agreed. “But you always thought it was just going to be you and Kara, and now you don’t know what to – ”

“Stop the car,” Lena ordered.

That did get Sam’s attention.

“What? Lena,”

“Stop the car, Sam,” Lena growled, “I’m getting out.”

“What, no you’re not,” Sam huffed. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Now Sam!”

“But,”

Sam slowed down at the red lights, and Lena threw her car door open.

“Lena, this is ridiculous, get back inside!”

“No,” Lena called out.

She stepped outside, and felt the cold wind and rain wrap around her body.

“I’m walking home!”

“Lena, you’re wearing four-inch heels! You live ten blocks from here! It’s raining!”

“I’ll manage,” Lena spat out, and threw the car door closed.

Sam watched with open mouth, as Lena stomped out on the street the best she could in clothes that were going to absolutely ruined after. The woman took big strides, trying to put as much distance between her and the car as she could, which made her a bit blind to her surroundings. Taking a big step closer to the sidewalk, Lena sank in a black puddle, which soaked her foot up to her ankle, and Sam could almost hear Lena’s cursing through the rain.

The rain was almost flying horizontally at this stage, and it must’ve been ice cold. Lena’s hair was already sticking to her face. Her jacket, while beautiful, was absolutely useless against this weather, and Sam just knew that Lena was already chilled to the bone.

But Sam knew she couldn’t call her back. Lena was stubborn. She would do things just to spite the people who thought she couldn’t. Lena wouldn’t get back in Sam’s car tonight, not even if her life depended on it.

Sam huffed, and leaned back.

Suddenly, a sleepy voice spoke up, shocking Sam out of her reveries.

“Are we there yet?”

Sam hurriedly looked behind her to see Ruby rubbing her eyes. She was still resting her head on Alex’s shoulder, and Sam could see the creases in her daughter’s cheek from Alex’s leather jacket.

“We’re almost there, baby. I promise.”

“Can auntie Alex stay over?” Ruby asked sleepily. “I think she’s really tired.”

Sam smiled, and looked over to the other brunette, who hadn’t woken up yet. Her mouth was slightly open, and her hair stuck out in different directions. It was adorable.

“Sure, baby. I’ll make up the couch.”

“Okay,” Ruby said, and her eyes closed again.

“We’ll be home in a few minutes, okay?”

Ruby nodded, but she didn’t open her eyes.

Sam smiled at the sight of the two girls sleeping next to each other. She resisted the urge to take a picture, and turned around, just as the light sprung to green. She put on her blinkers, and turned left, no longer heading in the direction of Alex’s apartment.

She took one last look to her right, but Lena had already disappeared into the darkness.

Sam shook her head, and drove home.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Enjoy this update of 17k(!!!!!) words! The longest chapter yet!

Lena frowned.

Either someone was secretly embezzling millions of dollars of L-Corp’s revenues, or the accounting department was doing pot again.

There were dozens of mistakes in L-Corp’s financial reports. Miscalculated overhead costs, data entry errors and last but not least: some of the figures had been jotted down in the wrong section, making the documents absolutely useless.

If she had to guess, Lena thought the accounting department might’ve been leaving too much work to the interns, instead of actually doing the work themselves.

Lena sighed, and called up L-Corp’s finances on her laptop.

_If you want something done right._

Without looking up from her screen, Lena patted her hand on the right side of her desk until it was able to locate one of her rice-crackers. They’d gone completely stale in the last two days and a half she’d spent in her office, but she chewed them down nonetheless.

Lena’s once meticulous office had turned into a garbage pile, she could admit it.

Lena wasn’t a sloppy person, _per se_ , but it was true that sometimes she got so caught up in her work, that she forgot to put back the stuff she didn’t need anymore, thereby filling a room with trinkets, papers and books.

This usually didn’t really pose any problems, because she’d always had people cleaning up after her. But, ever since she started living out of her office, she’d asked her assistant not to let anyone up, not even one of the pre-approved L-Corp cleaning crew members.

There were files and papers spread all over her desk and floor (because she’d run out of desk space) but she was positive she could retrieve the right document in seconds, if needed. Her office may be a mess, but it was a structured mess.

Food wrappers, empty glasses and take-out boxes were strewn all around the gigantic space, but Lena didn’t even really notice anymore. She just knew she’d run out of good snacks seventeen hours ago, and she had very little energy left to call her driver and ask him if he could pick up some Reese’s cups for her in the Supermarket.

So rice crackers it was.

It was fine though. She’d told her new assistant that she’d only hold meetings in the big meeting room one floor down, so no one would come in and see her office like this. She had a small built in bathroom in her office so she could shower from time to time. Her assistant brought over fresh outfits everyday and left them hanging outside her office. All she really needed was a pillow and a blanket to sleep with on the couch, and she was set.

Granted, it wasn’t the healthiest way of living, but she’d done worse. Way worse. She’d gotten through college with a caffeine addiction, ramen noodles, and a lot of self-determination, and that had all worked out fine.

Lena had just needed to get out of her apartment for a bit. She needed to get away from her personal life, and focus on L-Corp by being there for her company one hundred per cent. That meant, staying up, day and night to answer whatever conference call came in from anywhere in the world. That meant, dealing with IT issues at four in the morning, to make sure that her servers wouldn’t crash, and that she wouldn’t lose all the valuable information the company had gathered over the years.

And anyway, Lena preferred it like this. Her employees would go home at five, and the building would be quieter. She could work in peace and silence, and sleep when she got tired, whether that was at ten PM or at three AM. And no one would berate her.

It was all working fine.

Except that it wasn’t.

Lena wasn’t fine. She wasn’t even close to fine.

She wanted someone to tell her to go home. She wanted someone to care whether or not she’d slept more than three hours before going back to work. She wanted someone to yell at her that she was overworking herself, and that she wasn’t being healthy. She wanted that person to stand their ground, and refuse to leave until Lena would. She wanted that person to drag her away from her office, and force her to go to her apartment, put on some pj’s, and fall asleep in front of the TV.

The voice in her head personifying said person, strangely sounded a lot like Kara.

But there was no one waiting for her back home. There was no one to tell her to stop overworking.

Well, that wasn’t exactly true. Sam had sent her a total of two text messages asking her to hang out. Lena had replied to both that she was too busy to do so.

Sam had stopped texting then.

Kara hadn’t called Lena either. Not that Lena was expecting her to. But she had to admit, every time she heard the ping of her cellphone, her heart skipped a beat in misguided hope, and she was disappointed every time she unlocked the screen, and found that it was just another email or calendar notification.

It had been one week since the party, and Lena was slowly crashing back into reality.

She’d spent all of last week working long hours at L-Corp, trying to do damage control for all the hours she’d missed while spending the day in the hospital with Kara. She was already on such a tight schedule, dividing her time equally between CatCo and L-Corp, and missing an entire day’s work had completely disrupted any semblance of Lena’s well-organised life.

Her assistant had nearly cried when Lena told her she had to cancel yet another meeting with some important investor about something or other.

Lena kind of felt bad for the girl, but even so. It wasn’t her fault the world was trying its very best to keep her away from L-Corp.

Lena sighed, and scanned her desk for the quarterly numbers.

She frowned when she couldn’t find the document anywhere. She was sure she’d put it right next to her calendar/ organiser. The one Kara had given her on her first day of working at CatCo.

She huffed as she moved one stack of papers, skimmed through some others, and just flat out threw some documents on the floor to find it.

No luck.

She’d just patted herself on the back for having an organised mess of an office, and then this happened. _Honestly_.

Frustrated, Lena pushed her chair away from her desk, and sank to her knees on the floor. Maybe the document had fallen off her desk and she hadn’t noticed.

She scanned the floor for the missing document, and encountered tens of other stacks of papers – her personal taxes, CatCo’s finances, HR documents, CV’s – but no quarterly numbers.

She groaned as she patted the floor for some miracle. Some sign that her work could go forward. That she could continue doing L-Corp’s finances, and move on to something she actually liked, like spending her time in the lab. She needed that document as a sign that her life could move forward.

Just when she reached the next stack of papers near the right corner of her desk, she was interrupted.

“Good God,”

The familiar voice startled Lena so much, she temporarily forgot she was kneeled under her desk, and snapped her head up, effectively knocking it hard against the hard white polished wood of her desk.

“Awtch!”

Lena gracelessly grabbed the sides of her head, closing her fingers over the top, and clenched her eyes shut. The pain shot from the top down through her temples, and rendered her incapable of doing anything for a full five seconds.

Groaning, and with a lot less enthusiasm than she possibly could’ve mustered, Lena crawled from under her desk and stood up.

“Mother,” she said, walking around her desk to plop back down in her chair, massaging her injured head. “How nice of you to visit.”

Lillian Luthor looked regal as always, clad in her white skirt and matching blazer with her hair strapped down in a tight bun, yet she also managed to simultaneously look absolutely revolted at the sight of Lena’s office.

“I always suspected you too might carry the same gene that drove Lex to madness,” Lillian said, looking around Lena’s office with a horrified look, “but I never actually thought you could go _this_ mad. Even Lex cleaned up after himself after he was done building his anti-alien weapons.”

Lena rolled her eyes.

“Thank you, mother, for that very helpful comment.”

Lillian hummed, gripping her purse close to her chest, as if she were walking in a crime-ridden neighbourhood instead of her daughter’s office. Her eyes wandered over the papers and take-out boxes on the floor, and she shook her head.

“How can you conduct business in this environment, Lena?” she asked sounding distressed. “How do you organise meetings? How do you meet with investors, Lena – ”

She jumped when her foot accidentally knocked over a half-empty glass of water, which in turn slouched its meagre contents over Lena’s thick white carpet.

“Oh my Lord,” Lillian muttered. “If your father could see this.”

Lillian’s over-exaggerated behaviour was starting to annoy Lena. She didn’t invite her mother in. She didn’t invite anybody in. She didn’t ask for any input on how she was handling her business. This was her own bloody office! She wouldn’t very well let someone barge in and criticize it!

“Who let you in, mother?” Lena asked, annoyed. “Because I sure as hell don’t remember putting you on the guest list.”

Lillian turned around, and her eyes swept over Lena’s outfit in that same condescending, judgemental way she always did from the time she was adopted. It felt degrading, and awful, and it used to make Lena so terribly self-conscious when she was in high school.

She hated that it still had an effect on her, even after all these years of being in charge of her own life.

“You should work on your security detail, dear,” Lillian said, her eyes falling on the package of rice crackers surrounded by crumbs on Lena’s desk. “It took me about five minutes of threatening them with the power I still have over the board that I could use to fire them, and they folded like wet paper cards.”

Lena rolled her eyes.

“Of course they did. How utterly in character for you.”

“Not to mention your assistant.”

Lillian tutted.

“The new one is such a crybaby, Lena, honestly,” she shook her head. “I thought I taught you to pick the strong ones. This one nearly started bawling her eyes out when she saw me. Absolutely terrified that one.”

Lena briefly closed her eyes, and tried not to get too worked up at the thought that she would probably have to pay for the girl’s therapy for years after making her suffer through an ordeal with her mother.

“Thanks, mother. Really,” Lena drawled. “Haven’t you terrorised enough people this week? You just had to add my assistant too?”

Lillian shot her daughter a tight smile before she let her eyes wander around Lena’s office again.

“You’ve certainly gone for a new look around the office,” the woman noted dryly, changing the subject. “Any reason for this particular… refurbishment?”

Lena briefly entertained the idea of calling security up to her office and have the other woman forcefully thrown out of the building. But satisfying as that fantasy was, at this point in her life, it would do more damage than good.

“Why are you here, mother?” she asked tiredly. “Shouldn’t you be off enjoying your newfound freedom by plotting Supergirl’s downfall or something?”

It had come to no surprise to Lena that her mother had managed to weasel her way out of a conviction by selling out her son to the authorities. She was an opportunistic survivor. Lena hadn’t expected any less from her.

Lillian had basically taken credit for Lex’s downfall, claiming it was her swift action and close teamwork with Supergirl that had lead them to save the day.

It made Lena want to hurl, but at the same time, her mother was in the spotlight now more than ever. She had a book deal, appeared on numerous talkshows _and_ had managed to secure a deal with the FBI. On the condition that she would be closely monitored, Lillian had talked her way out of a jail cell, and was now on every terrorist watch in the nation.

She wouldn’t be able to lift a finger against Supergirl without the entire country knowing.

The thought, Lena couldn’t deny, was very comforting.

Lillian scoffed. “If you can even call it freedom.”

She turned to Lena.

“Did you know they seized my assets the first time I went to prison?”

Lena did know that. Alex had offered to get her whatever she wanted from Lillian’s stuff, if there was anything that belonged to her, but Lena had declined.

Everything she’d owned before, she’d either kept or discarded indifferently. It’s not like anything material she’d had with the Luthors had any sentimental value left.

Either way, Lillian shook her head, not expecting an answer, and let her eyes drift over the carpeted floor.

“Yes, they have my apartment and everything. They put me up in the Hilton, Lena, _the_ _Hilton_! Can you imagine?”

The disdain practically dripped from her words, and Lena rolled her eyes.

“We all have sacrifices to make,” she commented dryly.

Lillian hummed in agreement, either not grasping the sarcasm, or just plain ignoring it.

“I suppose we do,” she agreed. “So is that what you’re doing?”

Lena sighed.She really didn’t have the time or the energy to deal with her mother’s mind-games right now.

“What?” she asked tiredly.

Lillian gestured at the mess in her office.

“Is this you sacrificing yourself for something? Is this you… repenting for something?” Lillian asked. “Because by God, there are easier ways to assuage some guilt. Donate to charity, for example. Requires much less effort, and elevates public opinion,” the woman decided.

Lena sighed in irritation.

“Yes, thank you for this life lesson, mother,” she irked. “Fortunately, I’m not trying to atone for anything. I’m just working.”

Lillian hummed again, in that annoying, blood-boiling, condescending way of hers that made Lena want to scream out her frustrations.

But she bit her tongue instead, and just took it.

She was old enough not to let her own mother antagonise her anymore.

“If you say so,” Lillian smiled.

“I do say so,” Lena bristled. “Now, are you going to tell me why you’re here? Because I certainly know it’s not a casual visit to catch up on what’s new in each other’s lives.”

She arched her eyebrow to perfection, her ideal power move.

“Is it, mother?”

Lillian smiled, but differently this time.

She looked…calculating. Not hesitant but more… indecisive. Like she’d come here with a plan, a fixed list with all the things she needed to say, yet when she had the time and the place to say them, she was actively pondering whether or not she _had_ to share the information with Lena.

Whatever it was, Lena was already sick of it.

She crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back in her chair with an annoyed expression.

“Look, mother,” she said tiredly, “if you don’t have a valid reason for your visit, then I’m going to have to ask you to – ”

“You’re right,” Lillian interrupted.

Lena closed her mouth, surprised. She arched her eyebrows.

“About…?” Lena asked seriously.

Lillian sighed, before she walked closer to Lena’s desk. She stared at her daughter from across the table, and seemed to try and figure Lena out.

Lena wasn’t used to seeing Lillian look so indecisive.

Lillian was a woman who planned ahead, who had no qualms about doing things so atrocious they could make a grown man cry, if it would help her achieve her goals. She didn’t think twice about separating children from their parents. She hardly blinked when she launched a weapon that could wipe out all alien life. She lost no sleep over the plan to send a group of aliens and Alex Danvers into space, with no fixed end destination ahead.

Yet right there in her office, Lillian looked confident, yet unsure of either herself or Lena, and it was unsettling the CEO to say the least.

Lena uncrossed her arms and leaned over her desk.

“Mother,” she asked seriously, “are you in trouble? Are you in contact with Lex’s cronies? Because if so, you have to tell me now,” she urged. “That way I can still help you.”

“Please,” Lillian scoffed in response, “as if I could still work with his army of empty-headed, babbling minions. They are of no use to me. And no,” Lillian rolled her eyes, “touching as your concern is, I am not in any trouble.”

Lena resisted the urge to roll her own eyes.

Just typical. Every time she wanted to help her family, her family had to act like it was the most insane thing imaginable. A Luthor helping another Luthor. _Crazy_.

“However,” Lillian’s voice turned serious, and it caught Lena’s attention immediately. “I have caught wind of some… whispers.”

“Whispers,” Lena repeated.

“Yes,” Lillian replied.

“And where would you have heard these whispers?” Lena asked sceptically.

Lillian smiled.

“You know very well I can’t keep in touch with anyone associated with Cadmus or her sister organisations, Lena,” the woman smirked. “And I would never do anything to compromise my position with the FBI.”

“Right,” Lena muttered. “Of course you wouldn’t.”

“Exactly,” Lillian smiled, “so why don’t I save us both some unnecessary explanations, and we keep it at ‘whispers?’”

Lena sighed and rubbed her temples.

Every goddamn time.

“Okay, mother,” she gave in. “What kind of ‘whispers’ did you hear?”

“Well, I – ”

Lillian took one of the chairs, intending to sit on it, when she found it to be already occupied by a stack of papers, and an empty coffee mug that declared Lena to be the ‘best CEO in the world.’

The other chair didn’t fare much better. It was stacked with files and a few empty mars wrappers.

Lillian raised her eyebrows, as if the discovery of those files on Lena’s furniture, only further affirmed the belief that Lena was going batshit crazy.

Lena sighed impatiently, and stuck out her hand.

Lillian took the files with a disgusted expression, as if they were carrying germs and diseases, instead of just boring information on stock exchanges.

That expression was nothing compared to the one she sported when Lena carelessly dropped the papers next to her chair on one of the few empty slots on her floor.

Lillian shook her head, and sat down on the chair. She mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like ‘if your father were alive,’ but Lena didn’t care enough to comment.

“The whispers, mom,” she reminded her mother impatiently. “Tell me.”

“First off,” Lillian started in her business voice, “I want to officially state that I have absolutely no affiliations with the forces behind these rumours, whatsoever.”

“Noted,” Lena replied dryly.

“So,” Lillian crossed her legs, “as you may have gathered, the anti-Alien activism has seen a significant downfall in numbers since Lex’s death.”

Lena nodded tersely.

“After everything that’s transpired, many activists were arrested.”

“You can say terrorists, mom,” Lena interrupted.

The corner of Lillian’s mouth twitched.

“Let’s not argue over semantics, Lena,” she said. “It never changes the facts anyway.”

Lena shook her head, but motioned for the other woman to continue.

“The nation is celebrating,” Lillian leaned back in her chair, “because all the known _activists_ have been put away. The sons of liberty, Cadmus, Lex…”

Lena shook her head incredulously.

“And?” she asked.

Lillian tilted her head.

“You should know by now, dear, that the smartest people don’t showcase their plans for the world to see. Showmen are on the forefront of the media, not the action. They’re arrogant, lazy and have no real heart for the cause.”

She looked at Lena with a steely glance, and for an uncomfortable second, Lena was reminded just how much of his character Lillian had passed on to her son. Just because her mother wasn’t strictly speaking an enemy of the state anymore, didn’t mean that the person in front of Lena wasn’t a cold, dangerous creature. One that was not to be trifled with.

“What I’m trying to say is,” Lillian clarified, “they caught the people they _knew_ were responsible. The organisations that have yelled the loudest, that have appeared on talkshows. The ones who didn’t hide.”

A shiver ran down Lena’s spine.

“You’re saying they’re still out there?” Lena whispered. “Other organisations?”

“What I’m saying, Lena,” Lillian urged, “is that maybe, your little Superfriend has more to worry about than just little old me.”

“How so?” Lena asked hoarsely.

“Before I tell you, I’d like to remind you that I’m doing you a favour by telling you this,” Lillian said. “Not just you, Supergirl too. I hope you’ll remember that, if the need ever arises for me to request a favour from either one of you.”

Lillian arched an eyebrow, and Lena clenched her jaw.

Typical.

“How could I forget,” Lena forced out.

Lillian smiled a sinister smile, but seemed satisfied.

“About a week ago, I caught wind of some people trying to contact me.”

“What people?”

Lillian waved a hand dismissively.

“I’m not sure. Strawmen, most likely. Not the real people behind the cause.”

“What did they want?”

Lillian leaned closer.

“This is where it gets interesting. They were trying to pitch me an idea.”

“A pitch?” Lena asked confused.

“Yes,” Lillian urged. “But it wasn’t aimed at me specifically. At least, not at the Luthor funds.”

Lena was intrigued. Her mother had her full attention and she knew it.

“Who was it aimed at?”

“It was aimed,” Lillian proclaimed, “at Cadmus.”

“Cadmus?” Lena asked confused. “But Cadmus was disbanded ages ago.”

“Yes,” Lillian agreed, “it was. But that didn’t seem to bother them. They were more interested in all Cadmus had to offer, resource wise.”

Lena frowned. “Like capital? Evil inventions?”

Lillian continued, undeterred by Lena’s choice of adjective.

“Not at all,” she said, a tad too eagerly for Lena’s taste. She was enjoying this.

“They wanted to know if they’re was still a spark behind Cadmus, so to speak. People, sympathetic to the cause,” she clarified.

Lena sat back in shock.

“So then,” she stopped herself. “Wait,”

Lena rubbed her temples and tried to ignore the headache that was quickly making itself known.

“You’re saying, that there are people out there – an organisation,” she corrected herself, “that’s trying to recruit former members of Cadmus.”

Lillian shook her head.

“No, dear, I’m afraid it’s a little more complicated than that.”

For the first time since she entered the room, mockery and sarcasm completely left her body.

“A faceless, unknown organisation is recruiting people from every anti-Alien organisation there ever is or was. They’re building up to something, behind the scenes, without anybody knowing.”

Lillian shot Lena a grave look.

“Don’t you think that’s something your Superfriend ought to know about?”

Lena was left speechless for a bit.

This was too much to grasp.

They had _just_ won. They had only just been able to take out Ben Lockwood, her brother, the activists and the entire anti-Alien posse, and now this was happening?

Of course. Of course her day would go like this. Of course she couldn’t go one full month before yet another disaster struck. And now she had to deal with that too.

“What did they offer in return?” Lena asked.

Lillian frowned.

“I don’t know,” she answered honestly. “We never got to that part. The second they noticed I wasn’t interested, they left.”

Lena closed her eyes.

 _Goddamnit_.

“Okay,” she whispered to herself. “Okay. I’ll deal with this.”

She looked at the literal storm of papers on her desk and sighed.

“Might as well add this to the pile,” she added somberly.

“Though they didn’t tell me what they wanted,” Lillian suddenly spoke up again, “I have a feeling it’s going to be big. They spoke of it as an investment. A business deal.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Lena suddenly asked. “Not that I don’t trust you but – ”

Lena tilted her head with a frown.

“Oh no wait,” she said faking confusion. “I don’t trust you. Why the sudden urge to come clean about everything?”

She folded her arms.

“What do you get out of it?”

Lillian threw her an unhappy look, as if she felt uncomfortable just having to answer that question.

She pursed her lips thoughtfully, before replying:

“I still think the Aliens are overrunning this country. I still think we should study them, and arm ourselves against them.”

Lena fought the urge to roll her eyes. Honestly, she thought she deserved an award for how well she’d behaved these last ten minutes. She’d not rolled her eyes nearly as much as she’d wanted to.

“But,” and Lena’s ears perked up at the word, “I have seen first-hand what blind hatred does to a man. It creates a soulless madness, which burns everything it touches.”

Lillian shook her head.

“Lex was obsessed with aliens, and it destroyed him. He went too far. For God’s sake, Lena,” Lillian swallowed and looked at her lap. “Lex was hunting aliens off-earth! It wasn’t enough for him to drive them away, he wanted to make sure we were the only ones in the entire universe! He used an alien clone to drive our nation to anarchy, and he wanted to blow up an alien civilisation lightyears away from us!”

Lillian shook her head.

“He would have killed us all, if an alien hadn’t saved us from him.”

She looked up at Lena with a steel gaze.

“I might not like her, I might disapprove of her existence on this earth entirely, and I might detest her entire raison-d’être, but I’ll never forget that she was the one who stopped Lex from destroying all of us.”

She stared deep into Lena’s eyes.

“From destroying you.”

A silence fell over the two of them.

This was probably the most meaningful conversation the two had had in a long time. They weren’t quite used to it. The silence felt awkward and begging to be filled with something, anything.

“Right,” Lena replied awkwardly.

She didn’t quite know what to say.

She couldn’t quite tell if this was an improvement for her mother, or if it was just the general ‘Luthors detest owing anyone anything’ attitude. But, the woman wasn’t actively trying to hunt down Supergirl, so Lena would consider that a win.

“So,” Lena hesitated, “what now?”

“Well,” Lillian said, picking up her purse and standing up, smoothing her already wrinkleless skirt over. “I suggest you contact your little group of bandits and tell them what I just told you.”

She stood up straight and regained her haughty Luthor demeanour and attitude.

“As far as I’m concerned,” she spoke, “I did my part. Now it’s up to you to do with the information I provided as you see fit. You can use it to prevent whatever’s bound to happen, or you can ignore it completely.”

She shrugged.

“Personally, I couldn’t care less either way.”

Lena nodded as her mother gave her a last quick lookover, before turning on her heel and heading for the door.

“I know it’s not true,” Lena called out just before her mother could reach the door.

Lillian stilled.

“I know you care. You don’t want to admit it yet, and that’s fine,” Lena said softly but surely. “But I know that what Lex showed you, shocked you. You don’t want to see so much blood spilled again.”

Lena smiled softly, albeit a bit awkwardly.

“Thanks for telling me.”

Lillian stayed quietly for another three seconds before she opened the door and walked out without uttering another word.

Lena sank back into her chair, the wheels in her head turning at full speed.

The idea that most seemed to come back to her was ‘ _what the hell?’_ What the actual hell?

What was she supposed to do with this information? She basically had jack squat.

An anonymous organisation was sniffing about the ruins of old, failed anti-alien organisations? What did that mean? Was there going to be more drama? Would another Ben Lockwood or a different version of the sons of liberty rise up? And if so, was that actually so worrisome? Without someone mad like Lex Luthor at the wheel, would they really be something to fear?

Lena decided that it wasn’t up to her to decide on whether or not this news was worrisome. She needed to contact the D.E.O.

She sighed inwardly at the idea alone.

Alex and her might’ve grown closer in the weeks that followed Kara’s betrayal, but it had all been squandered after Kara had ended up in the hospital. Lena had messed up. Alex Danvers now hated her with a burning passion, and Lena couldn’t really blame her.

Because what had she done?

Lena shivered at the memories, and fought down the urge to down a drink.

She was starting to recognise that drinking was quickly becoming a habit, a reflex, so to speak, whenever something didn’t go according to plan. Or did go to plan. Or whenever she got nervous. Or scared. Or angry.

The point was, Lena was actively trying to fight that particular urge, by drinking a glass of water every time she needed a drink, instead.

It didn’t give her the nice buzz she was accustomed to, and it made her have to run to the bathroom ten times more often, but after what happened the last time she went binge drinking, Lena knew this was the only way.

She pushed the button of the intercom.

“Emily? I need you to clear my afternoon for me.”

“But ma’am,” a metallic, panicked voice rose from the tiny intercom, “you have a meeting with Mister Barnes at three. It has been rescheduled four times already!”

Lena cursed.

Of course this kind of news would only come on one of the busiest days of the week. These things were never just going well for her.

Fucking perfect.

A seductive voice in her head told her the meeting with Alex could wait. Her mother’s information had been vague at best. She could stand to wait one day, two days at the most, couldn’t she?

Lena inwardly sighed.

No she couldn’t.

Stupid conscience.

“Please apologise profusely to Mister Barnes, and tell him I’ll meet another time with him at his convenience.”

The voice over the intercom made a sort of whimpering sound, like what Lena imagined a kicked puppy would sound like.

She was reminded yet again that it wasn’t her who would bear the brunt of Mister Barnes’ anger and disappointment. Or that of any of the other cancelled appointments for that matter. That all felt on Emily, the poor girl.

It made Lena’s heart plummet into her stomach with guilt.

“Right. I’ll do that right away, Miss Luthor.”

“Thank you, Emily.”

She tried to convey as much sympathy and warmth as she could in her words, but she was afraid they all fell flat.

She should probably give Emily a bonus, or something, for helping her out so much this past week.

Lena’s hand left the intercom button, and chose to cover her eyes instead.

What a goddamn mess.

This day couldn’t possibly get any worse.

A visit from her mother, impending doom in the form of a cryptic message, inadvertently provoking one of her most important new inventors, probably being the cause of her assistant crying her eyes out in the bathroom later, _and_ a meeting with the angry sister of her former best friend?

It’s like the universe agreed with Lena wholeheartedly that she’d royally messed up, and was doing its very best to make her suffer.

Just then her phone rang.

Without checking it, Lena angrily swiped it, and brought it to her ear.

“What?” she asked curtly.

_“Lena?”_

Lena sat up straight in her chair when she heard the sweet tones of Kara Danvers’ worried voice make their way to her ear.

“Kara?” Lena asked hopefully.

This was the first time the other woman had contacted her in a week! She wanted to talk! She wanted to listen! Maybe Lena’s day was turning around after all.

 _“Hi,”_ the other voice said cheerily, if not a little out of breath.

“I – you,” Lena stumbled over her own words in her haste and delight to talk to Kara again. “How are you? I saw Supergirl flying about again on the news. Was that – ”

“ _Oh, yeah, that was me. I got my powers back on Monday. I found out by slipping in my shower and breaking my wall tiles when I tried to grab them for support,”_ she rambled. _“All by all, not the most elegant way of recovering my powers, but I’ve had worse.”_

Lena could hear the grin in those words, and she couldn’t help but smile broadly behind her own hand.

“You’ll have to tell me about the other times then,” Lena smiled.

“ _Oh totally!”_

Lena swore she felt warmer just by hearing the sunshine in Kara’s voice. It was so warm, so comforting, so familiar! Lena didn’t know if you could have withdrawal symptoms from missing someone’s voice, but if she did, hearing it again was like shooting pure heroin right into her veins.

She was soaring, she was ecstatic!

Kara’s voice was like a soothing balm on an aching bruise.

It felt like home. Like friendship. Like walking in the park. Like dancing around the kitchen in onesies to NSYNC and Britney Spears. Like falling asleep on the couch mid-cuddle. Like warm sweaters and borrowed T-shirts. Like lunches in rooftop restaurants and visits to the science museum and the aquarium.

Lena shook her head.

“What can I help you with?” she asked, putting on her best cheery Lena voice, the one Kara had once said could charm any living creature on the planet.

“ _Oh, um, I –_ ”

Suddenly, Kara was interrupted by someone on her end of the line.

Lena could make out some laughter, some background noise, and a woman’s voice. Kara giggled in return, and Lena felt something tug on her heartstrings.

She loved Kara’s giggle.

“Is everything okay, Kara?”

 _“Huh? Oh, yes! It’s fine_ ,” Kara said quickly. “ _I was just contacting you to, uh,”_

She laughed again at something the other person next to her had said. Lena quietly gripped the phone a little harder, suddenly feeling a little less sure of herself.

“ _Stop it_ ,” Kara giggled on the other end of the line.

Lena felt like a frozen ball had replaced her beating heart right there. She didn’t think she’d ever felt so unimportant in her life. Not even around the Luthors.

Kara was talking to her, but also not really talking to her. She wanted to tell her something, but she was also distracted. She was talking to Lena, her best friend, but someone else was more important.

Kara’s laughter implied that she had even forgotten she was even on the phone at all.

Lena felt empty. Forgotten. Like a bystander in a group of friends. She was unimportant. Invisible. She didn’t count.

Maybe it was because she had always been in the centre of groups. She was the head of her ‘squad’ of mean girls in boarding school – they were minions who feared her more than they liked her, Lex made sure of that – and when she was with the Superfriends, Kara always made her feel like she was the most important person in the room.

She wasn’t used to being ignored anymore.

Yet here she was. An outsider looking through a window – no. Not even that. She was like a girl with her ear to the door, desperately trying to hear what was going on with the cool kids, so she could live vicariously through them from a distance.

Lena swallowed hard.

“Kara?” she asked again, and she almost whimpered at the hoarseness of her voice.

She felt tears prick in her eyes, but she didn’t know why they were even there. Kara was still smiling and laughing on the other end of the phone, and Lena could barely refrain from letting out a dry sob.

“ _Yes! Lena, I’m sorry. My friend just came back. I have to rush. I just wanted to tell you, uhm,”_ she laughed again, breathlessly this time. “ _I got the interview! You know, the one you wanted. With Andrea Rojas?”_

Lena’s heart sank again at the memory.

“Right, well, that’s – ”

“ _I know you were very adamant on getting it, so I wanted to tell you that it was sent over to editing yesterday! I even got a, uhm,”_ she laughed awkwardly, “ _a follow-up interview today.”_

Lena knew what the interview was code for. She knew very well, because Andrea had made her intentions very clear on the night of the party.

It was a date.

 _A date_.

Kara had gone on a date with Andrea, and a follow-up interview basically meant that they were having their second date right now.

Andrea was the other woman on the line.

Andrea was the one who was making Kara smile, and was making her lose her train of thought. Andrea was the one who was making Kara forget all about Lena on the phone.

The realisation lay heavy on her heart.

“Two interviews in one week?” Lena managed to croak out. “That’s impressive.”

Kara giggled, but Lena couldn’t smile at the reaction, because she couldn’t tell if Kara was giggling at the compliment, or if she was smiling at something Andrea was doing.

“ _Yeah_ ,” Kara said, and Lena could just hear the shy smile in her voice. “ _She was pretty happy after the first one – just an orange juice please, thanks. Andrea’s gone to get us some drinks.”_ Kara informed her. _“So,”_ Kara started again, _“she set up a date – I mean a follow-up interview right after our first one had finished.”_

Lena forced herself to put a smile in her own voice.

_For Kara._

“It’s okay, Kara. You can call it a date.”

“ _Really?”_ Kara asked breathlessly – excited. “ _Because, oh my God, Lena!”_ she whisper-yelled. _“I mean, just, wow! I can’t believe this is_ happening!” she gushed. “ _It’s all so fast and overwhelming! We’re on our second date already! Granted, it’s just a lunch, but still! I mean, we haven’t really done anything – we haven’t even kissed again since, well_ ,” the voice on the line giggled, embarrassed, _“you remember.”_

Lena did.

_“But it’s just, ugh,”_

Kara’s happiness was almost palpable through the static of the phone line.

 _“She’s so nice and sweet and perfect. Lena, I like her so much! She’s taking me to her favourite restaurant tonight! Some sort of fancy place. I don’t even know what to wear! She says she wants to spend more time with me. All the time,”_ she gushed. “ _Isn’t that just so sweet? Can you believe it?”_

“Of course I can,” Lena replied truthfully. “You’re a gorgeous, amazing woman, Kara. Andrea would be a fool not to ask you out again before someone else managed to snatch you up.”

Kara giggled shyly on the other end of the phone.

 _“I want this date tonight to go well. But, Lena, I’ll be so out of place there,”_ Kara mumbled. _“Andrea is so fancy – like you! I don’t want to embarrass her.”_

Lena couldn’t stand the insecurity in Kara’s voice.

“You wouldn’t embarrass her, darling.”

The endearment was out of her mouth before she could stop it. For a second she was afraid it had ruined the entire exchange, but Kara glossed right over it.

 _“I don’t know, Lena,”_ she mumbled. _“I just want things to go perfect.”_

“And they will be,” Lena jumped in. “Things will go great, Kara. Do you still have that blue dress you wore to my gala? The cute one, with the patterns and the uneven bottom cut?”

_“Yes, I think it’s still in my closet somewhere.”_

“Okay,” Lena said, “wear that.”

 _“Really?”_ Kara asked hesitantly. “ _If you’re sure…”_

“Definitely,” Lena decided. “You looked gorgeous in that one.”

She blushed a bit at her own declaration.

She wasn’t lying though. Kara had been a vision in that dress. She’d stolen Lena’s breath away at that party. And probably not just Lena’s. Lena still remembered how Winn and James had gaped at Kara with open mouths. She did however note with satisfaction that Kara had only had eyes for her that night. Wide, sparkling eyes that made Lena want to throw a ball every night, just so she could see those eyes sparkle that way again.

 _“Well, okay then,”_ Kara breathed, suddenly sounding a whole lot cheerier. _“I guess that’s decided then.”_

Lena smiled.

A proud flush spread through her body. She’d succeeded. She’d pepped up her friend, and she’d helped her. Her friend was happy again.

Way to go, Lena, she applauded herself. It was usually the other way around. It would usually be Kara who would reassure Lena that she was amazing and wonderful and the best CEO in the world, and that she didn’t have to feel self-conscious about anything, because she was Lena friggin’ Luthor! She could do anything!

Lena was glad that for once, she could be the one to boost Kara’s self-esteem.

 _“I haven’t seen you around CatCo much,”_ Kara changed the subject. _“Are you coming around anytime soon?”_

And just like that, Lena’s smile fell.

“Actually, Kara,” Lena started carefully, “that is something I wanted to talk to you about.”

Kara fell silent again, and Lena wasn’t sure she was supposed to be happy or sad that she finally had Kara’s full attention, but only in strict boss-mode.

“I wanted to tell you to contact James about anything further related to your articles. I won’t dictate what you write about anymore. L-Corp’s stock has been taking a few hits since the Lex debacle. I need to do some damage control, so I’m going to focus on L-Corp instead of CatCo for a while.”

She waited breathlessly for Kara’s reply.

 _“Okay,”_ Kara said slowly. _“So I’ll see you in a couple of weeks then?”_

Lena sighed deeply.

“Kara,” she whispered after a beat. “It’s a bit more complicated than that. I don’t think I’m going to come back to CatCo as anything other than a majority share-holder for a while.”

“ _Why not?”_ Kara’s voice was small, hurt.

“Kara,” Lena started again, closing her eyes, “I want us to become close again. I really do. But to do that, I have to re-examine my moves, my mistakes. I abused my power as your boss in my anger. I threatened to fire you, because I was hurt and frustrated. That’s unforgivable,” she breathed. “I didn’t even know I was capable of doing that, until I did. And I did it to you, of all people.”

She paused.

“My very best friend. I hurt you. I belittled you. I won’t allow myself even the chance of doing so again,” she vowed.

_“But – ”_

“Kara, if there’s any hope of us rebuilding whatever we can from the broken pieces of our friendship, we have to do it by being on equal foot,” Lena said decisively. “I can’t repair anything if I still hold power over you. I won’t allow myself to do that, do you understand?” Lena urged.

There was static silence over the line, and for a second, Lena was petrified that Kara would just put down the phone, and go back to Andrea. That she wanted to cut the conversation short.

But she was happily surprised after all.

 _“You don’t have to do that,”_ Kara said quietly.

Lena smiled a watery smile.

Of course Kara would say that. And of course she would be so sweet about it. But Lena knew better. And even Kara knew better. Kara knew she was right.

Lena knew that Kara was still a bit afraid of her. Maybe not afraid, but still weary. Like she wasn’t sure if what she did or said to Lena could have major consequences.

Lena knew she’d hurt Kara, and she’d decided days ago that leaving CatCo in James’ capable hands was the right decision.

“That’s sweet of you to say,” Lena smiled sadly, “but I know this is the right move. I want to make things right, Kara,” she vowed honestly. “I don’t want you to be afraid of doing the wrong thing in front of me. You’re a great reporter,” she said sincerely, “and you sure as hell deserve an employer who can help you build on your amazing work instead of tearing you down.”

A silence followed her words again.

 _“Okay.”_ The other voice was teary too, even a little emotional. _“Thank you, Lena.”_

“It’s alright. It’s fine. I can’t wait to read your article,” she said, wiping at her damp eyes.

Kara laughed wetly on the other end of the phone.

 _“I’ll send it to you the second it’s approved by editing,”_ Kara promised.

“I can’t wait,” Lena smiled. “Now,” she said, “go back to your date. You should never leave a lady waiting!”

Kara laughed.

 _“Okay,”_ she whispered. _“Goodbye, Lena. Take care.”_

“Goodbye, Kara.”

There was a click, and then the conversation was over.

Lena looked at her screen.

The red call button and the picture of Kara and Lena together was the only indicator that they had even talked at all. That and the tears in the corners of her eyes, of course.

God, she wanted a drink right now.

The whole altercation with Kara had left her drained, tired, and weak. She felt like she was losing her grip on reality, and she needed some help in liquid form. Something she could hold on to. Something that would make it seem like losing reality wasn’t that bad, because reality sucked anyway.

She wanted a drink.

No, scratch that. She _needed_ a drink. Her tongue almost felt dry at the need to feel the burning liquor with the bitter aftertaste slide down her throat.

But she couldn’t.

Drinking was what had gotten her into so much trouble with Kara in the first place. Not just the drinking, of course, but it hadn’t helped at all. In fact, it had only made things worse. So much worse. Lena had sworn she would never do anything that could jeopardise her relationship with Kara ever again. And that meant never having a drink again, she would do it in a heartbeat.

The last time she’d had too much to drink was about three days before she had to start working at CatCo again.

She’d put it off for a long time. Two weeks to be precise.

Lena had done everything in her power to avoid going back to CatCo, but duty called. The workload there was overflowing, and with her brother’s scandal hot on the press, she needed to show her guidance and attendance to reassure her employees that their jobs weren’t at risk.

But Lena had actively tried to avoid all of Kara’s usual places and hang-outs. She didn’t go to Noonans anymore, instead choosing to go to the haughty coffee bar she used to go to before she met Kara, even if she felt out of place, missing the smell of cinnamon and sticky buns in the air. Even if she felt like the condescending people in suits were arrogant and rude and the complete opposite of the friendly waiters who knew her by name and slipped her free samples when they saw the bags under her eyes. The ones who would give her Kara’s order as well with a strangely paired wink, and a “You’ll need that too, we assume.”

Lena always did, and Kara would always laugh when she told her.

Lena didn’t go to Bentley Park anymore, because she knew that was Kara’s preferred lunch spot. Lena didn’t want to bump into the other woman having potstickers and a soda with James.

She didn’t even dare cast her eyes up to the sky, fearing that Supergirl would be flying over, and she would catch a glimpse of the blonde superhero, and she would drop everything she had and run after the other woman. Lena kept her eyes trained on the way ahead of her, if she wasn’t staring down at the pavement.

Lena told herself it was because she hated Kara. She told herself that she despised the other woman, and that her very existence made her nauseous, that that was the reason why she didn’t want to go to CatCo and look at Kara’s face again.

But the truth was she was scared. Petrified, even.

She knew that one look at Kara could make her fall to her knees. She knew that if Kara looked at her one more time with those apologetic eyes, Lena would forgive her in a heartbeat.

And she didn’t want that. She couldn’t do that.

Kara had hurt her beyond anything she’d ever felt. She couldn’t let that slide. Not even if it was for Kara.

So Lena’s alcohol-soaked brain had, four drinks in, had come up with the brilliant idea for her to wear an armour, made out of years of pent up frustration, hurt and betrayal. She wouldn’t let Kara in, not even if she came at her with all the love and the smiles in the world.

She decided she wouldn’t allow herself to be weak and frail. Instead, she would be rude, cold and distanced, and Kara would be scared and hurt, and she wouldn’t approach Lena again. It was a foolproof plan, Lena thought. Kara would keep her distance, and Lena wouldn’t be able to fall into the temptation that was Kara Danvers.

Of course it all got out of hand the second Lena saw Kara.

In her absolute frenzy to create the most anger, in her haste to recollect memories of pain, hurt and betrayal, a white-hot rage had gathered within her. It was like fire collecting in her fingertips, desperate to be let out, to hurt and to maim. Disgust mingled in her temples. All her instincts screamed at her to jump into action. Lena would’ve bared her teeth if the situation so demanded it.

It all came to an epic, horrifying bang when she saw Kara and James together. An all-consuming ball of rage and power, aimed at one unsuspecting reporter.

Lena shivered.

She didn’t want to think about it.

She didn’t want to remember how icy, and unfamiliar her voice had sounded when she’d berated Kara. When she’d _threatened_ her.

 _But she hurt you_ , that voice in her head whispered. _She didn’t believe you. She had your boyfriend spy on you._

That was all true, Lena conceded, but even she couldn’t feel the fury behind those statements anymore. There was just a dull, lacklustre hurt where the disdain and anger had been before.

Yes, Kara had lied and betrayed her.

And then Lena had stressed the girl out so much she ended up in a hospital.

On some level, Lena had to be worse than Lex or Lillian, she’d often mused afterwards. Lex and Lillian had focused all their rage and torture on creatures they thought to be inferior. Creatures they believed were harmful to them, to the human race. They believed they were exterminating a threat. They wanted to kill them to protect humanity, fucked up as their methods were.

But Lena hadn’t been protecting anybody when she was cutting Kara down.

There wasn’t some big reason behind her torture of the younger woman. There was just blind rage, and the desire to watch the other woman writhe before her. What kind of a monster would torture their own best friend? The friend that had always been there for her, in every situation? Who could be capable of doing such a thing?

Lena quickly drank her half-empty glass of water, and stood up.

She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t think about this right now. She had a mission. She had things to do! She couldn’t afford to be distracted by all the horrible things she’d done. She could do that later, when she was alone, trying fruitlessly to fall asleep on her couch.

Right now, she had a different angry Danvers sister to visit.

* * *

Lena was pleasantly surprised to find that her entrance card to the D.E.O. hadn’t been revoked yet.

Either it had slipped Alex’ mind, or Kara had convinced her sister that they might still need Lena’s help someday, and that denying her access would be pointless and stupid.

Lena liked to guess it was the second option.

She walked through the familiar dark, almost-cave like halls, down the stairwell, and straight to the open conference “room.” Lena thought it looked more like a landing clearing for Kara to jump to and fro when there was a Supergirl emergency, but that might just be her.

She didn’t find Alex there, however.

The room was occupied by relaxed people in uniforms, typing away on tablets, and soldiers gearing up with some basic weapons to handle whatever incident required their attention.

It was very different from the last times Lena had been there. Like the one time where Alex had called her hysterically, tripping over her words, trying to explain what had happened to Supergirl.

To Kara.

When Kara had been lying on a table, unconscious, with green veins decorating her beautiful body. When they were rapidly running out of options.

Lena had to swallow a lump in her throat at the memory.

She was sort of relieved she hadn’t known it was Kara back then. She didn’t think she would’ve worked as efficiently if she’d known. She would’ve probably broken down in a puddle of her own tears, unable to see past the idea of a Kara-less world. Lena didn’t think her heart could’ve bourn the stress and pain that would’ve come with the realisation that Kara was so close to death.

Lena shook the memories away, and turned left, to where she thought Alex’ office was.

The hallway was dark. Smooth black stones obscured any light coming from other other rooms, and dowsed the hallway into a gloomy, dark space, where Lena would never want to set foot at night. There were no windows, and there were a lot less people wandering about. No pictures or paintings, not even the American flag decorated the dark walls.

It was like the hallway was warning her not to go any further. Like it could just predict that Alex Danvers was going to be at the end of it, waiting with a snarl on her face, and a fist ready for its first punch.

But Lena was nothing if not resilient.

If she could stare down full-grown manbabies in expensive suits, she could stand to inform Alex Danvers about a vaguely threatening organisation.

She found Alex’ office at the end of the hall. A black plaque with in golden lettering “Alex Danvers, Director,” announced her arrival at the right place.

She heard muffled voices argue behind the closed door, and Lena had to admit she hoped she wouldn’t find Alex in a foul mood.

She had no desire to apply three coats of make-up to cover up a gigantic bruise on her temple tomorrow.

Lena knocked three times in rapid succession. She rasped her throat just a little, and stood up straighter, just like she’d been taught years ago by her frantic, disapproving mother.

She smoothed over her face, so it would show no signs of fear or intimidation. She was ready to face Alex Danvers.

But the facing took a long time, though. She waited for a while.

It was like there was no one there. No one came to answer the door. There was no indication that they’d heard her knock. But Lena could still hear the voices inside, discussing and arguing, even raising their voices every once in a while.

She sighed, before purposefully bringing her fist up to the door and knocking thrice.

The voices inside stilled.

Suddenly, Lena heard loud, angry footsteps approach.

The door was pulled open, and a frantic, annoyed-looking Alex appeared in her line of sight.

“What?” the director hissed.

When her eyes fell on Lena, her expression darkened even more. Lena had to admit she had to swallow her nervousness, because damn, did Alex look terrifying sometimes.

“You,” Alex sneered, crossing her arms. “What do you want?”

Lena raised her chin, and stared Alex down with her best business expression. Uncaring, unflinching and unafraid. Like a Luthor.

“Director Danvers,” Lena began firmly, “I’ve got some Intel about some anti-Alien movement in National City that I thought you might like to know about,” she stated.

A crash resounded in the space behind Alex, followed by a string of “Sorry’s” and “Nothing happened’s.” The D.E.O. director flinched at the sound, and clenched her fists in frustration, not even bothering to look behind her.

Lena raised an eyebrow.

“But if you’re too busy…?”

Alex sighed deeply.

“Intel?” she raised an eyebrow.

“Yes,” Lena replied matter-of-factly.

Alex narrowed her eyes, but Lena stood her ground, and stared back, unflinching.

Alex seemed to be debating whether it was worth giving into the urge to throw the door in Lena’s face with a satisfying bang over actually doing her job and letting Lena in to discuss the potentially valuable information.

Lena definitely noticed, and she inwardly smiled, knowing exactly what choice Alex was going to make, the great director that she was.

Alex clenched her fists and her jaw simultaneously, before giving Lena one last suspicious look-over, and begrudgingly stepping aside.

Lena walked into Alex’s office and was greeted by Brainy waving at her, while simultaneously typing away on a tablet.

It was a simple room with one big window, a pretty empty desk, and a holographic board near one wall. It seemed void of anything personal, save for one picture of Kara and Alex on the desk.

Lena quickly averted her eyes.

The office seemed unused, clean and so impersonal, that Lena couldn’t imagine Alex spent much time there. And, indeed, as far as she could think back, she’d only ever seen Alex working at the D.E.O. in the big social places like the open hall, or one of the conference rooms, where she was in contact with all her employees, and her lab.

Alex was a leader; she needed to be active, she needed to work closely together with those under her, and she needed to project the image of confidence, power and guidance.

So, seeing Alex hide away in her office with Brainy, puzzled Lena. Something was going on.

Unfortunately, Lena wasn’t given the time to ponder on the suspicious situation further, because right that second, Alex walked passed Lena, leaned against her desk, turned to face her, and folded her arms. The door hadn’t even fallen shut yet before she spoke up.

“Well?” she asked brusquely.

Lena threw her a pointed look.

“Well, hello to you too,” she said sarcastically.

Alex narrowed her eyes and glared at her, so Lena got the impression it might be better to just start talking.

“So,” she started, “my mother came to see me.”

“Your mother?” Alex asked disgusted. “What did she want?”

While Lena fully understood the hatred and disdain the entire world – including Alex Danvers – must feel for her mother, it still irked her somewhat that people would be so rude about her. She knew her mother was a terrible person, and she would be the first to stand up and say so, but that didn’t mean that she appreciated other people saying the exact same thing.

“She came to help, believe it or not,” Lena bit back. “She brought valuable information concerning a terrorist group in National City.”

“Really?” Alex drawled. “Do tell.”

So Lena did. She told Alex everything she knew, everything her mother had told her, which, granted, wasn’t a whole lot. She was done talking after about three minutes. But, it had to be said, Alex had shut up and listened attentively with a frown on her face for the entirety of the conversation.

After she was finished talking, Alex buried her face in her hands and groaned.

“I knew it,” she mumbled to herself after a while. “I fucking knew it. This always happens to me.”

She turned to Brainy.

“Why does this always happen to me. Why do these things always – no!” she yelled before Brainy could give her a statistical analysis on why something was always happening to her.

She walked to the holographic board, and angrily mumbled to herself, while picking up her tablet and tapping away on the screen.

Lena could just make out a: “Every goddamn time,” before she gave up on trying to decipher Alex’s angry musings.

“Okay,” she finally gave up, “what’s going on?”

“I knew something was up!” Alex all but yelled. “Every single time something slightly bad happens, something worse always follows! It’s like some goddamn cosmic joke!”

Lena’s eyes widened, but she wisely kept her mouth shut.

“Mon-El is back, Sam is Reign!” Alex angrily mumbled to herself. “Kara gets a new best friend, oh said friend is arrested for aiding and abetting her mother in prison.”

“Hey,” Lena crossed her arms self-consciously, “I was cleared for that.”

Alex ignored her, scowl deepening as she furiously clicked away on the tablet.

“Kara gets a boyfriend, that boyfriend’s parents want to destroy the earth. Kara starts seeing some new woman, there’s a new anti-alien organisation at work,” Alex scoffed. “Every goddamn – damnit! ”

Alex furiously tapped away on the iPad, until the holographic board was unlocked, and the items that had previously been displayed on the screen, were now visible to Lena as well. Alex and Brainy must’ve had locked it before she entered the room.

But what really threw Lena, was seeing whose head was virtually rotating on display.

“Wait,” Lena asked, “is that…?”

Alex looked up.

“Yes,” she said grimly, “Andrea Rojas.”

Lena frowned for a second, looking at the haughty, but admittedly beautiful face of Kara’s new friend.

“Should I ask? Is she the slightly bad thing in your life?” she asked eventually.

Alex grumbled, not looking up.

Lena didn’t think Alex really wanted to talk to her about anything, not missions, not science, and definitely not her sister’s new social life. But, apparently, Alex’s frustration about this new woman outwon her hatred for Lena.

“This woman,” Alex scowled, looking at the holograph, “she just showed up on Kara’s doorstep, out of nowhere!”

“Well,” Lena reasoned, “not really out of nowhere. More like, her apartment or her office.”

Alex shot her a dirty glare, and Lena held up a hand apologetically, and motioned for Alex to continue.

“Like I said,” Alex growled, and for a second Lena thought the other woman might change her mind and pick her hatred of Lena over her need to communicate with anyone other than a robot-resembling futuristic alien, “she arrived out of nowhere. I mean,”

She ran a hand through her short hair.

“She’s practically a stranger who just showed up at her doorstep!” Alex exclaimed. “Where did she even get the address? Who even does that?”

Lena’s eyes widened comically. She pursed her lips and nodded.

“That is weird behaviour, yes,” she said hoarsely.

Luckily, Alex didn’t seem to remember how she and Lena had officially met at Kara’s apartment so many years ago – when Lena had showed up unannounced.

Lena let her shoulders slump.

“But is that really a reason to have her face up on some board?” she asked tentatively.

Alex’ head snapped to see Lena’s.

“I mean,” Lena quickly back peddled, “she just has a crush on your sister. I’m not sure it merits an entire investigation.”

“Please,” Alex huffed, “your face was up on that same board for like a year and a half after Kara told me about your budding friendship.”

Lena wasn’t sure whether she was offended by the first part of that sentence, or more enamoured by the idea that Kara must’ve excitedly told Alex about their new friendship. So excitedly, Lena mused, that it merited Alex’ complete and utter suspicion.

Lena decided to settle on the second option.

“But to answer your question,” Alex begrudgingly admitted, “no, it doesn’t really merit an entire D.E.O. investigation. That’s why we’re doing this here.”

She gestured around the empty room.

“And,” she said, looking down on her tablet with slightly blushing cheeks, “also because after J’onn found out about me using D.E.O. tech to spy on you, James, and Mon-El after finding out Kara was seeing you all, he forbade me from ever using D.E.O. resources on a personal matter ever again.”

Lena bit back a smile. She could just picture it already. A flushed Alex, having to explain why Lena and Mon-El’s heads were on display in the big meeting room.

“So,” she repeated, “we’re not doing it out in the open.”

“Gotcha,” Lena nodded.

“In secret,” Alex added meaningfully.

“I got that, yes,” Lena commented with a hint of sarcasm.

“Good,” Alex responded, turning back to her tablet, “then you’ll stay quiet about this whole operation, if you know what’s good for you.”

Lena rolled her eyes.

When she saw how tense Alex’ shoulders were however, she took pity on the other woman. It couldn’t be easy, always having to make sure that the new people in your naïve, people-loving sister’s life were, in fact, good people, and not alien hunters, out for revenge on Supergirl.

“Alex,” she said softly after a while.

She only got a distracted hum in response.

“I think I can help with this too.”

That did get Alex’ attention. The woman turned to face Lena, and frowned.

“How so?” she asked.

“Well,” Lena said, “Andrea and I attended boarding school together. I know her.”

“Really?” Alex put down her tablet, and approached Lena. “What can you tell me about her?”

“Before you get too excited,” Lena warned, “we weren’t exactly friends. We were more like,” she hesitated, “acquaintances.”

“Acquaintances,” Alex repeated.

She looked a bit disappointed, but eventually shrugged.

“Acquaintances is better than nothing. Which is about all we have been able to gather,” she added, sounding more than a little miffed. “Even with all this tech,” she gestured to the screen, “this woman is still like a phantom to us.”

Lena nodded.

“She’s a bit older than me, I was only in my first year, when she was already a senior,” Lena explained. “But I talked to her a couple of times. That’s actually why I was pushing your sister to get an interview with her. I thought Andrea would most certainly award us an interview if she heard that a former classmate of hers owned the magazine that wanted the interview.”

Lena was almost scared to divulge the information, seeing as how her relentless pursuit of the article had led to Kara being hospitalised. But the only sign that Alex knew precisely what Lena was thinking about was the almost imperceptible clenching of her jaw.

“So what else can you tell me about her?” Alex asked inscrutably.

It seemed like she was getting more pissed at Lena the more she was reminded of what had gone down between the Kara and her, yet, she was desperate for any information about the woman.

“Um,” Lena tried to think back to the woman she had known years ago. “I remember she was smart? She had a business brain, that’s for sure,” Lena decided. “She won our school’s best young enterpriser prize. She was always thinking up plans for her future business.”

Alex didn’t look pleased with meagre information, but jotted it down anyway.

“Oh,” Lena remembered, “she was always very private, which was weird, considering she had an entire posse of followers in high school. She was pretty charismatic.”

Alex made a face, but Lena ignored her.

“But, when you would ask them about her – her followers, I mean – they would only know rumours about Andrea’s personal life. I think she only had like two real friends that she confided in. It was pretty crazy.”

“Yeah,” Alex commented, “we kind of figured about the whole ‘private’ thing.”

She clicked on her tablet.

“I mean, Brainy and I have been skewering the internet non-stop to find anything on this chick, and there’s just,” she gestured broadly with her hand at the empty space in the room, “nothing! Not even a freaking parking ticket! Other than some details about her family and the fact that she owns a big business, which started out a couple of years ago, we don’t know anything about her.”

The other woman looked so frustrated, that Lena tried to think of anything else that could help Alex regain her bearings.

“Look,” she tried to reassure her friend(?) “from what I remember, Andrea wasn’t a bad person. She was rich and privileged,” Lena conceded, “but so were all of us there. She didn’t really stand out, except for the fact that she was moderately popular, and very private. Those aren’t exactly valid reasons for an arrest warrant.”

Alex didn’t look happy. She also didn’t look entirely convinced. But, she knew Lena was right.

“Fine,” she grumbled. “So she might not be completely world-dominating evil,” Alex conceded. “But I’m keeping the Google alert on her name, though,” she warned.

Lena smiled. “I don’t think you would be you if that weren’t the case.”

The left corner of Alex’ mouth quirked up, as if she’d temporarily forgotten she didn’t really want to smile at Lena because she was supposed to be mad at her.

“I guess,” she mumbled.

She gestured for Lena to sit down in one of the chairs in front of her desk, and went to sit down as well, bypassing Brainy who was still obsessively typing away on his tablet, as she did so.

“Are you really this upset about a woman showing up at your sister’s door?” Lena asked seriously. “Because Kara told me you’ve been trying to get her to go out again. I don’t know,” she said, wiping some lint of her dress. “I guess I just thought you’d be happy for Kara to have an interest in someone else, again.”

Lena shrugged.

“It just didn’t really seem like something you’d do, for something so trivial.”

Alex sighed, and supported the side of her head with her hand, her elbow resting on her desk.

“I guess not,” she mumbled. “I mean…” Alex frowned. “I just don’t get it.”

“What don’t you get?” Lena asked carefully.

“Kara!” Alex exclaimed. “Everytime I’ve been trying to get her to go on a date with just about anyone, she’s declined! She says she’s had her big romance with Mon-El, which,” she snorted, “is bullshit, by the way.”

Lena couldn’t help but silently agree.

“Kara says she’s fine with just living her life as it is right now. With her friends and her family.”

Alex gestured between the two of them, and Lena felt herself blush with the idea that she could still be considered part of Kara’s extended family.

“And then, all of a sudden there’s this _woman_ ,” Alex emphasised, “who just, like, barges into Kara’s life, and suddenly that’s all Kara wants to talk about?”

She looked at Lena with big, confused eyes.

“Kara’s never even mentioned having an interest in women, and now she’s head over heels for this, this…”

“Stranger?” Lena suggested softly.

“Yes!” Alex exclaimed triumphantly pointing a finger at Lena. “That’s exactly it! A stranger! That’s so not like my sister!”

“Because it’s a woman?” Lena asked sceptically. “Because that’s not very open-minded of you,” Lena pointed out.

“What?” Alex asked. “No! That’s not what I mean! I mean, yes,” she admitted, “it’s weird that Kara’s never even told me that, especially after I only came out to her, what, like three years ago? She could’ve mentioned it a little sooner,” Alex grumbled.

“But everybody takes that journey on their own time, at their own pace,” Lena helpfully suggested. “Maybe she wasn’t ready then, but she is now.”

“Yeah, maybe,” Alex agreed softly, “but still!”

She turned to Lena.

“I know my sister. And I know what my sister’s like when she wants to date someone!” Alex exclaimed. “She’s the ‘follow all the romantic cues in a romcom’ kinda gal! She doesn’t believe in love-hate relationships, and she only ever dates people she’s known since forever! She gets crushes easily, sure,” Alex conceded, “but the dating doesn’t start until much, _much_ later!”

Lena nodded, trying to ignore the pang she felt in her chest at the idea that Kara was actually, officially dating someone else. Or, someone. Whatever.

“I mean,” Alex rambled on, “how is this the same girl that used to wait until my mom had gone to sleep to gush about who caught her eye and why! Kara is the kind of girl who’s giddy, and in love, and who has to tell all her friends before she can even consider dating said person!”

Lena couldn’t help but smile at the image of a blushing, head-over-heels in love teenage version of Kara.

“It just doesn’t sound like Kara,” Alex said softly, looking away, lost in thought.

“Hey,” Lena tried, “maybe you’re right. Maybe she’s not in love, and that’s why she’s behaving differently.”

Alex didn’t turn to look at Lena, but Lena could feel she was listening.

“Maybe all of this is just a bit over an overreaction. Maybe it is just a bit of an out-of-control crush that’ll die out in a week or two.”

Lena wasn’t sure who she was trying to reassure at that point. But it did seem to appease Alex a tiny bit.

The D.E.O. director nodded to herself while she listened to Lena, and when Lena was done talking she was visibly calmer than she was five minutes ago.

“Okay,” Alex said. “Okay. We’ll just see where this goes. Maybe all the fuss is about nothing, right?”

Lena nodded. “Right.”

Alex frowned one last time.

“I still don’t have a good feeling about her, though.”

Lena tried her luck, and put a hand on Alex’ arm.

“To be fair though, Alex,” the woman joked, “Kara told me you never have a good feeling about the people she wants to date.”

Alex cracked a small smile.

“I guess that is true,” she admitted. “You don’t even want to know how many noses I’ve broken for her.”

Lena laughed.

“Actually,” she proclaimed, “that absolutely seems like something I would want to hear about.”

Alex laughed, and just like that, a tiny fraction of the tension left the room.

Just when Lena wanted to make another quip, though, the screen jumped, and instead of Andrea’s face, the board now showed Lillian Luthor’s face, the Cadmus insignia, and several different names, one of which was Lena’s.

Lena frowned. “What…?”

“Oh, my apologies,” Brainy spoke up.

Lena had been so relaxed during her conversation with Alex, and had gotten so used to Brainy’s silence, that she had to admit, she almost jumped in her chair at the sound of his voice. She’d almost forgotten about his presence entirely. At the sight of Alex’s hand on her hip, near her gun holster, she could tell Alex had too.

“While you ladies were chattering, I decided to put up a list with everything Lena has been able to inform us about,” Brainy declared. “I analysed her information and cross-referenced it with names of known alien sceptics already in our database. I assumed that if they had already contacted one known anti-alien activist, they might try others in our database as well.”

Alex and Lena both regarded him with stunned expressions.

Brainy seemed to notice their behaviour and halted.

“Should I not have done that?”

“No, no!”  
“It’s fine, really, great!”  
“Perfect,” Alex and Lena rambled simultaneously.

Brainy nodded slowly, before fixing his attention on the board before him. Alex and Lena quickly stood up to join him.

“This is what we’ve gathered so far,” Brainy started, and so began an explanation into the connections that he’d found.

* * *

After about an hour of brainstorming, they still hadn’t found out much. Lillian’s information had been so sparse, that they only had a couple of leads to go on.

“Look,” Alex decided, tired and on her third cup of coffee, rubbing her forehead. “I suggest that Brainy and I do some fieldwork on this one. We meet with some people, try and get them to talk,” she suggested. “Maybe it’s nothing, maybe something pans out. We’ll see. For now though,”

She shot Lena a meaningful look.

“You’ve done enough. Go home.”

“But,” Lena wanted to protest, but Alex held out a hand, effectively stopping her.

“You’ve worked hard. You provided us with some great Intel.”

She awkwardly patted Lena’s shoulder.

“You did great. Thank you. We’ll inform you of anything and everything we find, okay? We’ll need your help on this one.”

Lena sighed, but gave up.

“Fine,” she muttered.

Lena grabbed her bag and blazer from where she’d carelessly dropped them during the meeting, and after an awkward exchange of smiles with Alex and a quick salutation from Brainy, Lena was on her way.

* * *

Three days later, Lena was still living out of her office.

Her mother hadn’t come by with more cryptic information again, so Lena’s days were filled with business meetings and overseeing L-Corp’s day-to-day business. She hadn’t come up with any good ideas for new products yet, so she hadn’t set foot in the lab in ages.

Lena was bored out of her mind.

Leaving the work at CatCo to James left her schedule emptier than ever, and for the first time in a long while, Lena found herself on another Tuesday at four PM with absolutely no more work left to do.

All her meetings were over; she’d answered all her emails, and L-Corp’s stock exchanges had been studied, analysed and sent down to accounting.

For the first time in ages, Lena didn’t know what to do with herself.

She leaned back in her chair, and swirled slowly from left to right.

Usually, when she was tired, and so done with L-Corp that she was convinced that if she stayed five minutes longer her eyes would go cross, Lena would text Kara. She’d ask her if she was up for a visit to the National City science museum, or to grab a quick bite in the French Deli next to Jefferson Park, or whatever other idea popped into her head.

Kara would almost always respond in the affirmative, but she did so with a thousand emojis and exclamation points which would always put a smile on Lena’s face.

But she couldn’t call Kara now. They hadn’t spoken since the last time they’d been on the phone with each other.

She had swallowed the urge to ask Kara how her date had gone, and Kara hadn’t texted her to let her know.

Lena rubbed her arms, trying to comfort herself a little.

She felt lonely.

She missed Kara.

She missed Kara a whole lot.

She’d missed Kara before, obviously. This wasn’t the longest they’d ever been apart. But it had always felt… different.

Lena had gone on dozens of business trips throughout their three years of friendship. But even then, her and Kara had been in constant contact. Kara would call her whenever she got the chance, keeping Lena updated on all the things that had happened in their little circle of friends.

Lena would always laugh, because Kara thought it of the utmost importance that Lena was in the loop about everything. That meant, that if Kara had successfully – or rather, unsuccessfully – managed to make lasagne, Lena would hear about it. If Alex sprained her ankle in the pursuit of a criminal, Lena would hear about it – often accompanied by Alex’ grumblings in the background that she was fine, and that Kara and Lena should mind their own business, and that she wasn’t even that hurt, she just had to crash in Kara’s apartment for a bit, because her building had an elevator, and whatever. She’d gotten the criminal anyway, so Kara shut up.

Lena loved lying on her fancy hotel beds, desperately trying to stay awake, just to hear Kara ramble on about how Eve had accidentally spilled coffee on James’ suit right before a meeting, and how he had to wear one of Winn’s old dress shirts instead, which almost made the buttons pop off. She loved hearing about how Nia and Kara had worked tirelessly on an article that was actually going to make the first page of CatCo magazine! She loved Kara’s voice, and she would never tire of hearing that sweet, melodious voice talk about the most mundane things in her life.

Every detail counted, and Lena loved all of them so much.

Of course, they had been apart for stretches of time when there was almost absolute radio silence from one side or another.

After Mon-El had left, Lena had tried texting Kara about a million times a day. She tried to invite the other woman to lunch, or she asked how Kara was doing, and what Kara was doing, and how her work was going. But Kara either responded with lacklustre, three word sentences, deflecting her invites, or she didn’t respond at all.

It had been one of the loneliest stretches of time Lena had encountered since she’d gotten to know Kara.

But she was supported by Kara’s friends and family – now her own friends and family – who were in the exact same predicament.

No one could convince Kara to get out of the house for anything other than work – and her Supergirl duties, as Lena now realised. Not even Alex, who had started to look desperate and exhausted, couldn’t get in touch with her unless she forcefully entered Kara’s apartment.

Lena could still remember the headaches she got from endlessly staring at her phone, waiting for – no _begging_ – for Kara to text her back.

Like some sort of addict, she needed her fix of Kara’s attention.

When she got a text, meagre as it could be content-wise, she experienced a high so great, she felt like her heart could burst, because Kara Danvers had thought about her, and had chosen to contact her. Kara Danvers had taken time out of her day to text Lena back, when she didn’t even text Alex back that same day.

However, when no text came, when Kara didn’t choose to think about Lena, the low and the downfall were so horrendous, that Lena could physically feel her heart break. She’d be hopeless, desperate, and she’d wait up for hours, keeping her phone charged at all times, so she could catch Kara’s message if it came.

But God, she would do it all over again the next day, just to try out her luck at getting the tiniest of chances to get to talk to Kara again.

Then, of course, there had been the silence after the fight. After Lena had finally faced Kara _. After Supergirl_.

After Lena had stormed out of Kara’s apartment, they hadn’t spoken for two full weeks. A long stretch of time for the two of them not to see each other, but it hadn’t felt long to Lena. In fact, the weeks had raced by. But then again, in those two weeks, Lena had had her righteous anger to hold on to. She felt powerful in the idea that the distance between herself and Kara was justified. Kara had hurt her, so she never wanted to see her again. She couldn’t miss her friend, because, in her mind, they’re was no friend to miss.

It had all seemed so logical, and she had been so _fucking_ angry, that there was hardly in any place in her mind, for her to miss Kara. She was frustrated and insulted to her core, and she figured that if she could just make sure that she would never have to worry about Kara again, she could forget the girl entirely.

So, to the best of her abilities, she’d made sure Kara would be protected at CatCo, the least she could do, and then she’d cut all her ties immediately. She didn’t want to know about Kara anymore. She didn’t want to know about Supergirl anymore. She didn’t want to see her anymore, she didn’t even want to worry about her anymore!

But now…

Lena was convinced that she was in some sort of purgatory.

She missed Kara.

She missed her warm presence, and her smiles. The way she would stare at Lena in adoration when Lena was explaining her new inventions to her. The way she would curl up on Lena’s couch, and brighten up the otherwise so sterile room immensely.

Now, they were tentatively becoming friends again, yet also not entirely.

They were friendly at the party, loving even. But only for the duration of the party.

And Lena wanted her friend back! She’d loved listening to Kara’s stories at the party, she loved that the other woman would divulge some of her history, some of Krypton’s history! A history, so sacred, and silenced for so long.

God, Lena needed her Kara fix again.

She unlocked her phone and clicked on her shortlist of favourite contacts.

Kara’s name was on the top of that list.

Lena’s thumb hovered just above the image of her and Kara, hugging on the couch in Kara’s apartment.

James had taken that picture one time at gamenight when she and Kara had been on a roll, and had won four consecutive games! Kara had been ecstatic, and had declared that their night of victory – a name Alex respectfully disagreed with – had to be commemorated.

Lena loved the picture so much, because Kara’s frozen grin was infectious, and made Lena smile every time she looked at it. The picture also made Lena remember how happy and satisfied she’d felt that night. She remembered how soft Kara’s loose curls were under her fingers when she’d squeezed the other woman tight. She remembered how Kara’s smell had invaded her senses, and how nothing, not even Alex’ sour attitude, could’ve ruined that night for her.

It had been such a magical night.

But now… Lena wondered if nights like that would still be a possibility in her future. She honestly wasn’t sure.

Lena lost the courage to actually text Kara.

She sighed as she closed the app, and left her phone open. It was like the bright-lit screen was taunting her. So many apps, so many messenger options, yet she had no one to contact.

No one who would want her to contact them.

But, Lena suddenly realised, that wasn’t exactly what social media was made for. Not all interaction had to be direct. She could just… take a peek at Kara’s life, without actually having to talk to the woman. She could get her Kara fix another way!

Lena silenced the voice in her head that told her this was tantamount to stalking by making herself promise this wouldn’t turn into a habit.

Lena clicked on her Instagram app, her heart pounding in her chest, even though she’d tried to convince herself it wasn’t a big deal.

The app seemed to take forever to load, and Lena was almost tempted to tap the app’s icon repeatedly, which would almost definitely make her phone freeze in confusion. Just then, the app finally loaded.

Before she could even type in Kara’s name, before she could even see if the woman found herself in Lena’s story’s, one single picture loaded at the top, with Kara’s username right above it.

It loaded in a matter of seconds, and was displayed right in front of Lena.

It was a picture of a blushing Kara, smiling shyly into the camera, surrounded by trees in gorgeous red and golden fall colours. Her eyes were bright, and her smile was wide.

But what really drew Lena’s attention to the picture was the image of Andrea Rojas, face close to Kara’s, pressing a red-lipped kiss against Kara’s cheek, eyes closed, facing away from the camera, but lips quirked into a smile.

The caption read:

“Fall really is a magical season.”

Lena’s heart fell.

It fell right into her stomach, hurting all her other organs on the way down.

Lena couldn’t close the app soon enough, and with trembling fingers, she locked the phone, and threw it somewhere on her desk. She brought her trembling hands to her mouth, covering it. She breathed heavily, supressing the pain and anguish that had suddenly wormed its way into her body.

Oh God.

Oh God.

No. This couldn’t be.

Oh _God_.

Kara and Andrea.

Andrea and Kara.

Maybe it all hadn’t really sunk in yet.

Oh God.

Maybe Lena hadn’t wanted it to sink in yet.

Oh God.

Maybe her disdain for Andrea and her jealousy had covered up all the other feelings.

Maybe the only thing she really caught from her conversation with Alex was that “it could just be a crush.” Maybe she’d held on to that tighter, and for longer than she knew.

Maybe she hadn’t realised that Kara gushing about Andrea was actually coming to fruition.

Maybe she hadn’t believed it could be.

Maybe she thought Alex was overreacting.

That it couldn’t be.

Maybe she didn’t want to believe.

Maybe it hadn’t sunk in, that Kara liked this woman more than a normal amount.

That Kara _liked_ , liked this woman.

Kara liked this woman like she had liked Mon-El.

Oh God.

Oh God.

Lena felt tears slide over her cheeks, and over her fingers, but she had no idea where they’d suddenly come from. They felt weirdly discorporate and otherworldly. Like they weren’t supposed to be there.

Sam was right.

Sam was _right_.

Sam had been right all along.

She loved Kara.

No, no.

No, no, no, no, no.

She loved Kara. As more than just…

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, NO!

Lena stood up suddenly.

This couldn’t happen. Not right now. Definitely not right now. Not ever, but definitely not now!

Oh God, how was this happening? How could this be happening?

In a haze, Lena walked over to her cabinet, and shakily brought out her favourite bottle of scotch. The bottle was expensive, even for her, and when she poured it into a glass with trembling hands, she spilled much of it onto the table. It didn’t deter her.

She threw it back, knowing full well it was a sipping-scotch. One that was supposed to be enjoyed, savoured. Lena ignored all of that, and downed another.

Lionel’s heart would break at the sight. Not that of his daughter drinking, hell no, he’d be proud about the family resemblance. No, he’d be furious about her throwing back his favourite drink so carelessly.

But Lena couldn’t help it. She had to cleanse herself off Kara Danvers. She had to erase her. She had to get rid of the thought of her, of the memories, the ideas, the _feelings_ associated with her.

Lena sat back down in her chair. She breathed in deeply.

“Okay,” she muttered to herself. “Okay.”

She had to take a deep breath, and clear her head. This couldn’t be happening, but it was, so now Lena had some decisions to make.

She nodded to herself.

She could do this. All she had to do was try to be a distanced, neutral observer to the problem. She could do this.

Lena took one of her hairties, and tied her hair back in the tightest, highest ponytail she could manage.

If there was one way to approach a problem, she’d learned early on, it was by getting her hair out of her face, to get a fresh take on whatever was happening.

But, Lena thought when she looked around her office, she couldn’t fix anything if her working space was overflowing with work material. No, this required a clean office, a clean slate, and a clear mind.

With that in mind, Lena stood up and started collecting all the important documents strewn carelessly around the room. She systematically organised them by subject, and then suborganised them by whether or not she still needed the document in question. After she’d collected all of them, and had put them on her assistant’s desk for her to deliver to the right departments, Lena took two of the biggest trashbags she could find from the cleaning crew’s mobile cleaning station. To say they looked aghast at her move would be an understatement.

Lena threw everything in the bags. All the things that weren’t usually present in her office disappeared in the black bags, one by one. Loose copies, food wrappers, some disgusting old leftovers she had to pinch her nose for to actually get rid off, empty pens and broken tech toys she had messed with… all of it was gone in the matter of an hour and a half.

Lastly, Lena collected all her empty glasses, plates and bowls, and went down all the way to the third floor, to where the cafeteria was. She loaded all of them in the dishwasher, along with the cutlery and plates from the other employees, turned it on, and with a satisfied smile and a few greetings to her baffled employees, she went back up to her office.

Her office was as clean as it had been before the party, and Lena could slowly but surely feel more like herself. Her office, her room, was as pristine she always wanted it to be, and she felt in charge of her own life again. The mess couldn’t hurt her now.

Lena Luthor was back.

She sat back down at her desk, and rubbed her temples.

It was time to tackle her Kara problem.

Objectively speaking, Lena knew that the particular situation wasn’t the end of the world. She’d had crushes on people before. She’d had unrequited crushes before, even! So this wasn’t a drama, she reasoned. This wasn’t anything new. She just had to rationalise it. She had to deal with this as if it were a business decision.

So she did.

Lena took one of her old, trustworthy notepads out of one of the drawers, and took out her favourite pen, one that Lionel had gifted her for her high school graduation. And to make up for the fact that he couldn’t make it there, even though he’d promised to attend.

In perfect, neat handwriting, Lena wrote:

L-Corp’s solution to the quandary of an excess of norepinephrine, phenylethylamine and oxytocan in the executive, in relation to a subject with interpersonal interest to the executive.

Lena figured that if she made the title as distanced and objective as possible, it would feel more like writing a thesis than adressing actual heartbreak. And she was right.

Lena frowned, looking at the title, and approached the issue the Luthor way.

Step one: analyse the problem.

Lena was in love with Kara. She was in love with Kara just when her and Kara had had a major fall-out. Kara didn’t feel the same way and was romantically intertwined with a third party. Lena didn’t stand a chance.

Step two: gauge the negative consequences of the problem to the business.

If she told Kara she was in love with her, Kara would almost definitely think Lena was playing a trick on her after all the horrible crap she’d pulled before. Even if she didn’t, she wouldn’t leave Andrea now. Their friendship would be ruined, any further interactions would be awkward and uncomfortable at best, Lena would lose her best friend.

Step three: are these consequences a hit that the company can take, or does it require further action?

Not being friends with Kara would kill her. The distance they had now was already killing her, and it had barely been a week and a half. No. She couldn’t lose Kara. She wouldn’t. The thought alone made Lena sick to her core. It would be complete and utter torture, and Lena had no desire to put herself through such a predicament.

Step four: if the consequences are incompatible with the survival of the business, how do we fix the problem and avoid said consequences in the first place?

Lena got stuck on the fourth one.

She had to get over her feelings for Kara, that much was clear. But how? She couldn’t very well drink herself into a stupor every night again to dull the pains, that would kill her. She couldn’t tell Kara, because, again, disaster!

Lena sank her face further into her hands.

How had she handled this in college? How had she gotten over being rejected?

Oh right.

An idea popped into Lena’s head.

“Of course,” she whispered to herself, “of course!”

Lena picked up her phone again, going straight to her contacts. She scrolled for a bit, hesitating between three or four numbers, before she finally made a decision, and resolutely clicked on the number she was looking for.

She shot a quick text, and sank back in her chair with a drink in hand.

Lena had done it. She’d found a solution, like she always did. Now she just had to execute it.

A wry smile appeared on her face, as she sipped her drink.

She knew exactly what she was going to do with her time tonight.

* * *

When at precisely 8:45 PM her doorbell rang, Lena opened her door in bright red lingerie.

The woman on her doorstep, a beautiful blue eyed lawyer with a short-ish blonde haircut took in Lena’s outfit with big eyes. Lena had met her a couple of years ago at a club, and had held on to her number ever since. She’d only used it a couple of times, but still. It was a nice number to have.

“Wow,” the blonde said after a beat. “You’re really not shooting for subtle tonight, are you?”

Lena huffed, and tugged on the other woman’s blazer, pulling the woman into her apartment.

As soon as the door closed, Lena pulled the woman against her own body, kissing her hungrily.

She bit and licked at the other woman’s lips, until the woman pliantly – or maybe more out of surprise – opened her mouth to let Lena’s tongue in.

The blonde moaned, digging her fingers in Lena’s soft back.

“Lena,” she sighed, once Lena decided to let go of her mouth, and press lingering kisses down the woman’s jaw and down to where her neck met her shoulder. Lena ignored her, and continued her assault, biting and licking wherever the woman’s skin was uncovered. She pressed open-mouthed kisses to the woman’s collarbones, and revelled in the scent of the other woman’s perfume.

“Lena,” the woman tried again, her voice coming out in a low keen.

“What?” Lena whispered into her skin.

“Fuck me.”

Lena smiled against the woman’s neck, and hummed.

“What?” the blonde woman asked desperately when Lena didn’t comply.

“I don’t know,” Lena said nonchalantly. “I don’t think you’ve earned my fingers yet.”

The other woman moaned, a mixture of arousal, desire and frustration.

“Lena, please!”

Lena let go of the other woman entirely, taking a step back, and observing the blonde with cold, calculating eyes. The blonde leaned in, trying not to lose contact, but Lena was resolute in her action.

She looked at quivering mess of a woman, and smirked. She was already so far gone. Her cheeks were flushed, and her neck and collarbones were covered in a multitude of red hickeys and bitemarks.

“You want my fingers,” Lena said with a fake edge in her tone, “but you haven’t given me anything.” She tutted. “That doesn’t seem like a fair exchange to me.”

She leaned in closer to the other woman, who was trembling on her legs.

“What will you give me?” she asked.

“Anything!” the other woman burst out. “Anything at all, Lena please!”

Lena smiled. This was exactly what she’d been waiting for. She loved playing this game. This predator and prey- like dance. And the blonde lawyer just loved to play along.

“Very well,” Lena said, taking a step closer to the blonde woman, and softly raking her fingers through blonde tresses.

She leaned in close, until her mouth was touching the shell of the other woman’s ear. “Let’s see how many times you can make me come with your mouth.”

The other woman shivered from head to toe, and when Lena took a step back, she could see her eyes were blown, hungry for Lena.

Lena didn’t want to waste anymore time. The woman’s need was definitely matching her own, and she was quickly running out of patience.

She pulled the blonde’s blazer off, and then undid the zipper to the other woman’s red slacks. She didn’t even bother with the woman’s blouse.

She pulled the blonde into her room, and pushed her on the bed.

The other woman leaned her weight onto her elbows. She was already out of breath, Lena noted with mild amusement.

“How do you want me?” the other woman quirked an eyebrow.

Lena slid the red panties off her legs, and sat up on the bed.

“I want you to make me forget,” Lena whispered.

The other woman’s fingers trailed up her thighs, but Lena swatted them away.

“Not yet,” she said. “I want something else first.”

The other woman didn’t look surprised. She just waited until Lena gave her next order.

“Move up,” Lena commanded, and the other woman did.

Lena quickly propped some pillows under the woman’s head, and, when she was satisfied with the result, she crawled over the blonde’s body, until her pelvis was hovering over the woman’s mouth.

“You ready?” Lena asked, already panting in anticipation.

Instead of answering, the blonde pulled Lena’s thighs closer, until her mouth touched Lena’s wet swollen folds. She didn’t hesitate for a second as her tongue darted out, and licked into the softest parts of Lena, while her fingers left red indents in Lena’s thighs.

Lena gripped the headboard tight and moaned.

“Yes,” she hissed. “Just like that.”

This was _just_ what she needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Thank you so much for reading! I hope you liked it! I felt very self-conscious about this chapter, because I was worried people would find it boring or bland. I hope it still felt like a nice update. Anyway, I'll try and update every three weeks now. The next update should - hopefully - be on the 17th of November.


	9. Chapter 9

Kara couldn’t stop smiling.

She tried, truly, but she couldn’t.

The people around CatCo had started giving her the side-eye, often murmuring among themselves whenever they passed her. Her dopy grin was probably the source of many rumours going around the office, but Kara couldn’t bring herself to care.

There was a box of chocolates – and not just any chocolates! An assortment of the finest chocolate pralines one could possibly hope to find in the city – right there, on her desk! On the beautiful, cream coloured box, there was a tiny card, marked with the initials R.J.

It didn’t say much. In fact, it didn’t really say anything. There were just three tiny black x’s embedded in the card.

It made Kara blush right up to the tops of her ears.

Being with Andrea was great. Not just great, it was amazing! It was fantastic! It was wonderful in the sense that it was also deeply terrifying, and Kara was continuously swinging between absolutely love-struck, and skincrawling anxiety that she would do something wrong.

Andrea was… new. She was nothing like anybody Kara had ever met before. Well, Kara reasoned, she did sort of resemble Lena a little, when she thought about it. But even there, the comparison stopped at: classy CEO lady’s who know how to get shit done.

Kara wouldn’t go further. Because, try as she might, she couldn’t help but notice how different Andrea was from everybody else in her life.

She was smart, but not in a Lena or Brainy way. She was calculating, she was good at sizing people up. Sometimes, Kara would go on rambling about her favourite subject, and Andrea would just listen, her eyes narrowed and her lips quirked in a mysterious smile, that always left Kara guessing what the other woman was thinking.

She’d since found out it was Andrea’s way of learning everything about her. She would observe, acknowledge, and then store away the information somewhere in that huge brain of hers, just in case it could come in handy at some point.

Such as now, when Kara had a box of chocolates before her. Chocolates she’d mentioned were her favourite about two weeks ago. Andrea had remembered.

It amazed Kara.

Andrea was amazing.

Kara fished her phone out of the pocket of her slacks, and started typing with a grin plastered on her face.

Got your back to work gift. Thank you. You’re the best.

She added three heart emojis, and sent it off.

Not even two second after she’d put her phone down on her table, it started ringing, Andrea’s name flashing on the screen. Kara unlocked the phone with a grin.

“You know I’m already dating you, right?” Kara teased. “You don’t have to keep trying to win me over.”

“Oh I disagree.”

Andrea’s husky voice made Kara smile so hard her cheeks started to hurt.

“A girl like you should be appreciated every day, by every means necessary,” Andrea said seriously.

Kara rolled her eyes, but hid her smile behind her hand.

“You’re so cheesy.”

“You bring it out of me.”

Kara laughed. “You’re the worst.”

Kara twirled on her feet as Andrea started talking about the day ahead of her. For the life of her, Kara couldn’t figure out how she’d gotten so lucky. It was like the universe had sent Andrea to her, to apologise for putting Kara through some truly awful relationships. Like a: “Hey girl! Sorry about the whole invasion-boyfriend. Here’s a gorgeous hot CEO to make up for it. Keep doing you girl!”

Alex had rolled her eyes when Kara had offered her theory, but Alex rolled her eyes at everything, so Kara didn’t mind. She was convinced she was right. Andrea was everything Mon-El hadn’t been. Self-sufficient, smart, elegant and just so freaking gorgeous. Not that Mon-El hadn’t been handsome in his own way, he sure was a great-looking guy, but he just didn’t compare to Andrea.

She was pulled out of her reveries by some light tapping on the glass door. She turned to look, and saw James, pointing at his watch.

Right. Work. Meetings.

She’d totally forgotten about that part.

Somehow, even the slightest hint of her girlfriend – yes, _girlfriend_ – could turn her day completely upside down. Kara wouldn’t be able to focus on anything, she forgot about work details and meetings, or she would enter the wrong office when she read a new text Andrea had sent her.

She was a mess.

But what a happy, overjoyed, blubbering mess she was.

She just got the tinkling of Andrea’s fading laugh through her phone, and felt a pang, knowing she’d have to cut of their conversation before it had even properly started in the first place.

“Hey Andy?”

Andrea hummed in response.

Kara bit her lip. “I have to go. James just called me to a meeting. Am I still seeing you tonight?”

“That’s okay, my darling,” the voice on the other end of the phone said. “No rest for the hard-hitting journalists, I’m sure.”

Kara smiled. “I’m afraid not.”

“And yes,” Andrea said with a smile in her voice, “I will pick you up at seven.”

“Great,” Kara said. “I might still be at CatCo then, I’ll let you know.”

“Perfect,” Andrea concluded. “I can’t wait.”

Kara blushed. “Me either.”

James knocked on the door again, and Kara quickly gathered her notes.

“I’ve gotta go, bye!”

“Goodbye, Kara.”

Kara put down her phone with a smile. Nothing could ruin this day for her.  
  


* * *

  
Noonan’s was closed.

Kara stared at the darkened windows with a horrified expression. This was her lunchspot! This was where she was supposed to get her mix of bearclaws, cinnamon roles and donuts! Where was she supposed to go now!

This day was a disaster.

Sulking, Kara turned around. Where else could she go? What else could she possibly get for lunch that could rival the delicious, calorie rich sweets that she called food?

With an unhappy sigh, Kara decided to walk down the street, and see if any food places caught her eye. It wouldn’t be as good as Noonan’s, and they probably wouldn’t have her amazing chocolate covered donuts with added rainbow sprinkles, but it would have to do. With slumped shoulders, and a slight drag in her step, she left Noonan’s behind her.

After a couple of minutes, Kara found a new salad bar that she knew she would’ve never even bothered to look at twice a few months ago. But something about the beautiful painted green leafs on the window made Kara stop.

The place looked beautiful. There was a short line that ended right outside the door, probably due to the fact that it was lunch hour, and that the restaurant resided in a prime position in a business district.

If she’d known about this place a couple of weeks ago, she might’ve brought Lena along. Or, more accurately, Lena would’ve brought her along. Lena would’ve liked the place. She would’ve pleaded and begged until Kara finally would’ve caved, and would’ve begrudgingly gone with her, and eaten a tiny, green mess of a salad.

For Lena.

Lena would look so pretty if something like that were to happen.

She would be so happy, and her beaming smile would light up even a salad bar. Seeing her like that would make Kara’s day, she was sure of it.

She could honestly just picture it already.

Lena would wear one of her signature suits, her hair high up in some messy ponytail, and her sunny smile would be accentuated by that bright shade of lipstick, and –

“Kara?”

Kara blinked.

So maybe she was thinking about Lena a little too much. Maybe she’d pictured her a little too well, because standing right before her, plastic container filled with a surprisingly colourful salad, was Lena Luthor.

“Lena!” Kara blurted out.

Lena smiled shyly. “The one and only.”

They both regarded each other with a mixture of surprise and awkwardness.

Kara didn’t know what to say, and it made her feel horrible. Lena was her best friend, her most amazing, wonderful, best friend in the entire world, and she couldn’t think of a single thing to tell her. Once upon a time, they would’ve bumped into each other, and a waterfall of words would’ve erupted, right up until they had to separate, and even then the conversations usually continued via text messages.

But now Kara didn’t know what to say, or what to do.

And Lena didn’t seem to fair much better. Her mouth was opened in a tiny ‘o’, as if she really wanted to say something, but found out at the last possible moment that she didn’t know what that was.

All Kara could do was look at Lena, and take in the perfect woman, her friend, who was now a total stranger to her.

Lena glanced down at her hands, which clutched her salad. Her face brightened in a way that Kara knew indicated she’d had a good idea. Lena looked back up, smiled a tiny smile and pointed at the salad bar behind her.

“So,” she said casually, “hath hell frozen over or were you really about to go into a salad bar?”

Kara let out a short disbelieving laugh.

That remark was so Lena, so perfectly her Lena, that she felt a rush of affection bubble up inside her.

“I’ll admit,” Kara joked, “it was a close call. But in my defence, Noonan’s was closed, so I’m kind of bordering on the edge of insanity right now.”

Lena laughed in that carefree way of hers that made the dimples in her cheeks stand out, and made her nose scrunch up adorably. Kara could only laugh along to that kind of laugh. It made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

It made her feel brave.

“Hey,” Lena said suddenly, “if Noonan’s is closed, you’re probably looking to get lunch somewhere, right?”

Kara nodded.

“Well,” Lena asked carefully, “I was just about to eat this salad in the park.”

She shot Kara a nervous look.

“Would you maybe like to grab something to eat and join me?”

Kara’s grin couldn’t get any wider if she tried.

“Absolutely!”

Lena teasingly bumped her elbow against Kara’s as they turned to walk.

“You sure your new girlfriend won’t mind?” she asked with a grin.

Kara flushed red, stammering a no, eyes trained on the ground.

Lena laughed, and dear Rao, that laugh. Kara would do anything – superpowered things included – to hear that laugh again everyday for the rest of her life.

“So I take it things are going good then?”

Kara smiled, thinking back to Andrea’s note that morning.

“Yeah,” she whispered dreamily, “they’re going pretty great.”

At Lena’s answering smile, Kara felt the need to elaborate.

“She’s really nice about everything, you know?”

Lena hummed. “Like what?”

“Well,” Kara started, putting her hands in her pocket, “for one thing, she doesn’t mind taking it slow – seeing as I haven’t really dated any girl ever, you know?”

Lena stopped in her tracks, and it took Kara looking left and right, and then twirling on her heel to notice Lena had gone missing. She took a step back to join Lena.

“Lena?” she asked.

“Kara,” Lena said seriously, looking her deep in the eye, in a way that made Kara feel uncomfortably put in the spotlight. “Her taking things slowly because you desire them to be so, is not a quality that’s admirable okay? It’s basic human decency. You should hold her to a higher standard than that. You should hold _all_ your lovers to a higher standard than that.”

Kara opened and closed her mouth a couple of times.

Lena frowned. “You do know that, right?” she asked softly.

Kara blushed. “Well, yeah of course. It’s just – I thought… I mean, she was just nice about it, you know? Kind, and all that,” she tripped over her words.

Lena raised her chin, her eyes indecipherable.

“Okay,” she stated simply, and continued walking.

Kara blinked.

How Lena could go from passionate and imposing to calm and composed to the next was an enigma to her. Kara wanted to ask what brought that whole thing on, but decided against asking. If Lena had let it go so easily, Kara would too. She wanted a nice lunch with her friend. And she was going to get one, so help her Rao.

Kara skipped until she reached Lena’s side again.

They exchanged small smiles; Lena’s waking up the dimple in her cheek that Kara loved so much.

Once upon a time she’d made so much fun of Lena ‘Super imposing CEO’ Luthor having the most adorable dimples in all of history. Lena had tried to stay mad, but the ridiculousness of the situation had made her laugh out loud, which had in turn unveiled a dimple she couldn’t hide, even if she tried her hardest to cover it up with her hands. Kara had just pulled them away and had snapped a picture of Lena, head thrown back, mouth open in a wide smile, and the adorable dimple right there, near the corner of her mouth.

Kara smiled at the memory, and looked ahead. The cold day suddenly felt a little warmer. She resumed her walk with a spring in her step. Nothing could possibly ruin –

“So how’s Alex feeling about the whole Andrea thing?”

Yep that did it.

“Aah, well, you know Alex,” Kara deflected. “She’s being a bit… Alex-y about the whole situation.”

Lena tilted her head to look at Kara. “Meaning?” she enquired.

“Well,” Kara drawled out, “you know. She’s a little… suspicious and overbearing, if I’m being honest.”

“Well,” Lena asked, “did she at least like Andrea?”

Kara bit her lip. “Well, they might not technically have met in person. Or over the phone. Or any sort of meeting really.”

She smiled sheepishly at Lena, who in turn shook her head.

“Kara, if you want Alex to be less worrisome, you might have to consider letting them meet up in the first place.”

Kara huffed. “I know, it’s just… that doesn’t usually help.”

“How so?” Lena frowned.

“Well, you might have noticed that Alex is sorta… really protective over me.”

Lena looked at Kara with a deadpanned expression on her face. “Yeah, no kidding.”

Kara let out a short, embarrassed laugh, remembering all the times Alex had threatened to hurt Lena when she even turned on Kara a little.

That included that one movie night where Kara had been allowed to choose the film, and she’d chosen ‘Moulin Rouge,’ which, considering it had only been three months since Mon-El had left, had been a terrible decision to begin with. Lena had made Kara jerk up from her place on the couch by saying it was a terrible movie. Lena had pointed out that there was no way any human being in the late stages of tuberculosis could have possibly sung the notes Nicole Kidman had sung with such power and strength. She’d said that the plot was completely over the top ridiculous, and that no director could pass this off as a believable, academy worthy movie. When Kara started tearing up again at the sheer mention of Satine’s death, after she’d already cried her heart out during the woman’s last song, Alex had almost thrown a punch at her. The only reason she didn’t was because Maggie had stopped her. Also, Kara would’ve never forgiven her. And also, also, Lena was the one who took Kara in her arms and whispered soft things into her ear until she wasn’t sad anymore. Kara had melted it in Lena’s arms, and was in such a state of near comfort, that she’d fallen asleep right there and then. How could Alex have stayed mad?

“I’m just scared that when they actually meet, Alex is gonna do her whole ‘mean F.B.I. shtick, and it’s going to drive Andrea away,” Kara confessed. “I don’t want that.”

Lena looked at Kara in confusion. “F.B.I. shtick?”

Kara sighed. “Yeah, you know. That thing she does when she makes herself look all imposing, and then she’ll squeeze your hand super tight when you shake hands, and she’ll go all: “Special Agent Alex Danvers, good to meet you. Yes, I can deadlift 225 pounds.” And then she’ll go and have a talk with them when I’m in the bathroom, or looking away for _one_ , damn second,” she emphasised, “and then they’re left petrified.”

Lena laughed at Kara’s horrible impersonation of her sister, and for a second, Kara’s mood lightened considerably.

“Yeah, okay,” Lena grinned, still shaking with laughter, “I am familiar with that move. She may have used that voice on me back when she didn’t trust me at all.”

Kara pouted.

“No you don’t get it, Lena,” Kara huffed. “She does that with every guy that crosses my threshold. It’s always the same! I get a date, they stop by my place and my sister’s _conveniently_ coming by to get something out of my fridge or whatever.”

An eyeroll indicated that there was nothing convenient about the whole thing.

“Then,” Kara continued, “they quake in their boots, refuse to even look at me after their ‘chat’ with Alex, and then, somehow,” Kara threw her hands up, “they never call me again.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Lena took pity on her, and let her shoulder bump against Kara’s in support. “That must suck.”

Kara sighed. “Yeah.” Then a smile broke through. “At least she cares, though. As insufferable as she may be. She’s always looking out for me.”

Lena smiled too. “She is.”  
  


* * *

Kara and Lena were seated at a small table next to the window in a fancy new brunch and lunch place.

It had started raining about six minutes after they’d decided to eat lunch together in the park. Right after their conversation about Andrea had come to a close.

When the first drops had fallen, Kara had felt a surge of nauseating fear bubble up inside her. Lena had wanted to eat something in the park. That plan had fallen through. What if she didn’t want to do something together in any other setting? What if she decided to just eat her salad in her office? What if hanging out with Kara in an enclosed room with no escape was too much for Lena, and she wanted an out?

Luckily, Lena had just looked up, sighed, and turned to Kara.

“If only your powers included controlling the weather, right?” she’d said with a wry smile.

Kara’s heart had done a wild summersault, but she’d somehow managed to contain her reaction to a small answering smile.

“Yeah,” she’d whispered, “too bad.”

They both paused for a bit, seeing tiny dark spots appear on the grey stones beneath them. Kara feverishly searched for something to say. She wanted to beg Lena to stay for a while, but as the rain started to come down at a faster pace, Kara knew she wouldn’t be able to keep Lena for long.

Right when Kara felt absolutely discouraged that she and Lena would ever have lunch again – the rain had darkened the pavement completely, and Lena had shivered almost imperceptibly from the creeping cold – Lena turned to Kara with a pensive look on her face.

“How do you feel about hummus?” she asked.

“Hummus?” Kara repeated.

“Yes,” Lena said, “there’s a spot not too far from here, that serves the best selection of hummus in the city.”

Kara’s heart started beating a little faster.

“What about your salad?” she asked, barely containing the smile bursting up inside of her.

Lena shrugged. “I’m sure my assistant will appreciate it just as much as me.”

Kara, who had never had hummus in her life, and who only had a vague idea of what hummus actually was, smiled broadly.

“Lead the way.”

Which had led them to rush into a quaint little café, decorated with dozens of houseplants, but served food that Kara still wasn’t a hundred per cent sure about. For one thing, the portions consisted largely of vegetables and lentils. For another, all their drinks seemed to promise some sort of cleansing, detoxifying power, but tasted, in Kara’s humble opinion, kind of icky.

But she’d gladly eat mushy lentils and boring green things for the rest of her life if it meant sitting across from Lena again.

She couldn’t help but beam from time to time at the mere sight of her.

Lena was wearing one of her pinstriped suits, and her hair was up in an uncharacteristically messy ponytail. Kara was mesmerised at the sight of Lena cutting up her food carefully, and eating in such a way that her red bold lipstick never once got smudged.

_How does she do it?_

“So,” Lena teased in between bites, “how’s life for CatCo’s star reporter?”

“Oh,” Kara blushed, waving away the compliment, “same old, same old. Somehow, now that my articles have gotten more track, Snapper’s being even harder on me than usual. It’s crazy.”

Lena shook her head. “I’ve only had met that man a handful of times in my entire life, and I can’t imagine ever working with him for longer than three minutes, honestly.”

Kara laughed.

“He means well,” she promised, “he just doesn’t show it very well.”

“Uhu,” Lena said sceptically.

“Really,” Kara insisted. “He just wants me to reach my full potential!” Then, in a softer voice, she added: “Miss Grant was the same way.”

Lena’s smile tightened for a second, before it returned to her soft, happy smile. The change was almost too short for Kara to even be able to notice, but she did. And she frowned.

Was something wrong? Did she say something wrong? She mentally went over the last words she’d spoken, but she couldn’t think of anything that would’ve set Lena off.

Kara sighed internally.

Was this what it was going to be like for the rest of their friendship? Tight smiles, hesitant words and careful attitudes? That seemed exhausting.

“That must be nice,” Lena commented, taking a sip from her wine, “having a mentor. Someone to teach you the ropes.”

Kara smiled. “It is. Was,” she corrected herself.

Lena nodded, but didn’t comment on the obvious slip-up.

“She must’ve taught you a lot about the reporter scene,” Lena stated.

Kara nodded. “She taught me everything,” she smiled at the slew of memories that rushed through her head.

Lena tilted her head in question.

Kara leaned in closer over the table, gross meal discarded and forgotten.

“She taught me how to stand up for myself,” Kara said. “How to go after what I want, and not apologise for it. She taught me how to deal with men who think they can tell me what to do, or who I am.”

Kara smiled wistfully.

“She taught me everything. Even how to be a better hero.”

At that, Lena sat up straight, and clenched her jaw.

“Oh,” she said, bringing her fork to her lips. Her tone sounded casual, but the tension in her hand betrayed her emotions.

Kara frowned.

“Something wrong?” she asked carefully.

Lena shook her head, chewing the small bite in her mouth for what felt like an eternity. Her eyes were trained on the table, like she was mentally calculating some risks of a new invention in her lab, instead of having lunch with her best friend.

“I’m fine,” Lena said with a small smile.

“You sure?” Kara asked, not sounding very convinced.

She didn’t like Lena like this. When she couldn’t read what Lena was feeling. She could either be off in her own thoughts, thinking of things she still had to do at L-Corp, or she could be eviscerating Kara with her mind.

Like she had, not so long ago.

Kara swallowed uncomfortably. She didn’t like this.

Lena shook her head. “No, no,” she said faux-casually, “I just hadn’t realised Cat Grant,” she almost spat out the name, “knew of your second identity.”

Kara frowned in confusion. “What?”

“I mean I guess it makes sense,” Lena noted, waving her fork with every word. “She invented Supergirl. It’s no wonder she wanted to know who was hiding behind the metaphorical mask.”

“But Lena – ”

“I mean I would want to know if I was her,” Lena laughed in a frenzy sort of way. “I would want to know if my assistant was out fighting bad guys instead of getting me my coffee,” she laughed. “Right?”

Kara felt a sinking feeling in her stomach.

“Right,” she said slowly, “except – ”

“And obviously you two had a bond. You were close. So close and – well, she was your boss.”

Lena laughed, but instead of warming Kara from the inside like it usually did, it made the blood in her veins feel like ice. The laugh was almost cruel. Painful.

“I guess I was your boss too, but not like Cat,” Lena pointed out. “She was obviously _super_ important to you. And why shouldn’t a media mogul know your biggest secret, right? She obviously knew you _so_ well, she would choose not to publish it and make a shit-ton of cash. You must’ve trusted her with everything you – ”

“Miss Grant doesn’t know!” Kara interrupted harshly, cutting Lena off.

The speech was just too mean. Too cruel.

Lena was struck silent. Her mouth was still open, like she was in the middle of making her argument, and time had just frozen around them. Freezing everything right in its place. Silence fell over them, yet the chatter of the busy café raged on around them.

They were frozen in a moving world, and Kara didn’t know how to undo it.

It struck her then, how lonely she felt, even though she was sitting right across from the best friend she ever had. It had all started out so promising, so hopeful. Just a regular lunch between two friends, like the hundreds of regular lunches before. Yet somehow, it still ended up in this twisted, horrible, painful contact that somehow dominated every single interaction between them.

Were they only going to be able to be friends again when there was a bunch of other friends around them, forcing them to stay civil? Or would they only be able to communicate honestly over the phone, when there was no chance of a physical threat? Was this their reality now?

Kara almost whimpered.

Was this where their friendship would end? In uncomfortable conversations, laced with feelings they actively tried to supress?

Kara looked down at her plate, and self-consciously started rubbing her upper arms. It’s like the cold tone their conversation had taken on, somehow translated to a physical sort of frost.

It was Lena who broke the silence.

“I see,” she said simply, before taking up her fork and starting to eat again.

The sound of the cutlery against her plate seemed too loud and piercing, and it made Kara flinch. It was screeching in her ears. It sounded like a hundred people screaming, like agony and trouble and discomfort and Kara hated it.

She put her palms flat on the table, trying to get a grip on the situation again. She focussed on her breathing. Slow, in and out, so quiet, the woman across from her didn’t notice a thing. The cold wood under her trembling fingers felt soothing, and Kara felt a bit more like herself again.

Which meant she realised that this wasn’t a good situation to be in. Which meant she knew she had to say something.

“This isn’t working,” Kara whispered.

“What?” Lena asked, focussed on trying to get the waitress’ attention to fill her wine glass.

“I said,” Kara raised her voice just a little bit, “this isn’t working.”

Lena’s head snapped to Kara’s. Her eyes were wide, and the disbelieving look in them, almost made Kara want to call up Sara Lance to ask her to reset time so this wouldn’t have happened.

Lena dropped her cutlery on her plate with a loud clang. She opened her mouth to say something – and then the waitress arrived.

“What can I get for you?” she asked in a cheery voice.

Lena didn’t react. She just stared at Kara with open mouth.

Kara’s stomach sunk.

“Ma’am?” the waitress asked politely.

Lena still didn’t move.

“Lena?” Kara tried carefully. When the woman still didn’t react, Kara turned to the waitress. “I think she wants a refill on the wine.”

She added a small smile, but the waitress still left with a stunned frown on her face.

“Le – ?”

“What do you mean this isn’t working?” Lena cut her off.

Kara’s shoulders slumped.

“I didn’t exactly mean to put it like that,” she tried.

“Yet you did,” Lena countered.

Kara sighed and closed her eyes for a brief moment.

“Lena – ”

“No, Kara.” Lena was raising her voice now. There was hurt in it. Palpable, deep-rooted hurt. “I want to know what you meant.”

“All I meant to say,” Kara said, “was that we haven’t spoken about _it_.”

Lena raised her eyebrows.

“So?” she said sounding unimpressed. “I don’t know about you, but I’m in no hurry to talk about it. Because I want us to be friends, yet that ‘it’ brings back feelings that make friendly conversation very close to impossible.”

She leaned in just a tad closer over the table.

“You’ve seen first-hand just what kind of reactions that has provoked in me, Kara,” she said with big eyes. “You know how awful I can be. I just want us to get past that, and forget it ever happened! I don’t exactly want a repeat of last time. I was awful. I don’t ever want to open that part of myself again.”

“And that’s the problem,” Kara argued. “We don’t talk about it, and it’s clearly causing some problems!”

“Like what?”

“Like,” Kara spluttered disbelievingly, “the fact that you rush to conclusions! That you vilify anyone who might know about _it_. The fact that you’re obviously angry at me, and supressing it only makes it harder for us to talk! You feel bad about how you treated me, yet you also can’t live with the fact that you’re still hurt about the secret. You can’t reconcile those two emotions, and you’re handling it horribly!”

Kara almost felt out of breath by the end of her speech. She was so tired, she was so drained.

_And they hadn’t even had the talk yet._

Yet Lena said nothing. She just sat there. Blinking, staring. Kara felt herself lose hope by the second.

Oh dear Rao. Was this it? Was this the last time they’d ever talk?

Then the waitress returned. She set the glass of wine down near Lena’s hand, and once she’d confirmed that Kara didn’t need anything, she was on her way.

For a second, Lena did absolutely nothing. Then, her hand moved from her lap to the table. She took the glass of wine and set it on her lips. She opened her mouth and started gulping the drink down.

Kara watched with open mouth as Lena expertly chugged the glass of over-expensive biological wine, until not one drop was left.

Lena put the glass down with a hard thud, and took a breath.

“Okay,” she said after wiping some droplets of wine from her lip with her thumb, “let’s talk.”

That was one of the most power move worthy actions Kara had ever seen in her life, and she had worked for Cat Grant for three years.

“Yeah, uh, sure,” Kara stammered. “Where do you want to start?” she asked carefully.

“Truthfully, I don’t really know, Kara,” Lena said harshly. “I’ve never been in the loop, I don’t know what guided your almost astoundingly ridiculous thought-process, so why don’t _you_ tell _me_ where to start?”

Kara instinctively withdrew within herself.

“Lena – ”

“God, Kara,” Lena buried her face in her hands. “How could you – why would – I can’t – ”

Kara could only stare with teary eyes how Lena lifted her face from her hands and stared at Kara in utter contempt.

Lena seemingly regained her composure, because when she started to talk again, her voice was a lot calmer. But it was a tense sort of calm. A calm that hold so much anger, so much pain. It was a calm that Kara knew could never lead to anything good.

“I proved to you over and over that I was not like my family,” Lena spoke slowly. “I rescued you, I helped you, for God’s sake, Kara! I built you a suit to protect you against kryptonite, and you still. Didn’t. Trust. Me.”

“It wasn’t about trust!” Kara interrupted.

“Oh like hell it wasn’t!” Lena sneered. A vein was popping dangerously near her temple, and Kara knew things were going to blow soon.

“You trusted everyone in your life with your secret. From Alex to Winn, to Brainy, and _God_ ,” Lena stressed, “even Nia.”

Kara swallowed.

“Nia and Brainy have been in your life for a year and a half. I’ve been in yours for over three years!”

Lena’s beautiful green eyes started to fill with tears, yet she apparently willed them not to fall. A talent Kara didn’t seem to possess, because a single tear escaped her eye at the sight.

“Yet somehow, I didn’t deserve to know,” Lena whispered, hurt. “Even though we spent so many of those three years together, you decided I shouldn’t know. You invited me to movie nights, and game nights, and I was the only outsider in a room full of people. You betrayed me.”

A dry sob escaped her lips.

“How do you think that made me feel, Kara?” Lena asked. “How many times did I tell you about how betrayal has shaped my entire existence? How many times did I confide in you how hurt I was over those betrayals? And then... How was I not supposed to guess that you didn’t tell me because you didn’t trust me? Because I’m a Luthor,” she spat out.

“It’s not because you’re a Luthor!” Kara exclaimed. “And I’m getting so tired of you always using that as your counterargument!”

Lena scoffed and leaned back in her chair. Kara instantly regretted putting her thoughs in those words. Lena shook her head slightly. She lifted her glass in the air, signalling the waitress that she needed a refill.

Kara lowered her voice. “Lena, you know you’re not a Luthor to me. You’ve _never_ been just a Luthor to me.”

“Well,” Lena answered with a wry smile, “guess that’s easy to say when all your actions prove the exact opposite.”

“What actions?” Kara asked, getting upset. “Please, let me know what specific things I’ve done to make you believe you’re just another Luthor to me. Because the way I see it, I’ve tried to prove the contrary time after time after time! As Supergirl, _and_ as Kara.”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

“Okay,” Lena sat up straight, “fine. You want an example; I’ll give you one. The way you treated me when you find out I was helping Sam.”

“Oh my God,” Kara buried her face in her hands.

“Yes, oh my God, Kara,” Lena sniped. “The things you said to me, the way you looked at me, I – ”

She shook her head in disgust.

“You knew me as your best friend. You knew me as the person who trusted you with all my secrets. I helped Supergirl, without knowing a single thing about her. That,” she pointed a finger at Kara, “that takes guts. And you spat on me.”

“Lena, I’ve apologised for that so many times – ”

“As Supergirl!” Lena whisper-yelled. “I got your half-assed explanation about ‘the stress of the moment.’ But finding out you were Kara added a whole new dimension to the situation!”

Lena angrily wiped away some tears that were threatening to get out, and Kara had to swallow her guilt at the sight. Lena was so hurt. So pained.

“I tried to do everything right. I lost Jack,” her voice cracked. “I – I threw my own mother in prison, even if it broke my heart. I built you a suit even after our fall-out. I killed my own damn brother for you, Kara! What more did I have to do?” she pleaded. “What else could I have done to prove to you that I was worthy of knowing your secret?”

“I don’t know,” Kara whispered.

Lena scoffed disbelievingly. “Well that helps.”

The waitress exchanged Lena’s empty glass for a full one, and Lena wasted no seconds picking it up, and taking a big gulp.

“I don’t know what to tell you, Lena!” Kara said exasperatedly. “You’re my friend. You always were my friend, and I trust you with my life.”

Lena regarded her silently.

“Clearly not,” she stated, almost resigned, like she was giving up, “or you wouldn’t have treated me like you would my mother and brother. You wouldn’t have used me at your convenience. You wouldn’t have betrayed me.”

The words came out so hurt, with such harrowing sorrow in them, that Kara couldn’t help but lose hope. Maybe Lena was hurt beyond all repairs.

But that didn’t mean she wouldn’t try her best.

Kara clenched her fist and took a deep breath.

“Lena,” she started, as calmly as she could, even when she felt like crying, “I’m sorry for everything that happened with Reign. I handled the situation wrong. I should’ve trusted you, but the thought of you making kryptonite,” Kara sucked in a breath. “It hurt me.”

Lena didn’t say anything. Her raised eyebrow though, radiated a certain distance that Kara was now all too familiar with.

“Look,” Kara was getting desperate now, “I get that the ‘I’m only human’ expression doesn’t really apply to me, but the message does! I make mistakes! I’m not perfect! People always expect me to, but it’s not feasible! I can’t be everywhere at once, and do everything perfectly!”

Kara’s frustration was bubbling up, until it overtook everything in her soul.

“Yes, okay,” Kara admitted, “I shouldn’t have acted out all my anger and frustrations on you, but you weren’t innocent in all of that either.”

Lena’s chin snapped up. Her eyes narrowed.

It was a warning sign.

 _Careful now, Kara_.

But since Kara had never been a really careful person to begin with…

“You lied to me. You used kryptonite without telling me, because you knew I would be hurt. I wasn’t the only one keeping secrets.”

“I don’t owe you my secrets,” Lena snapped.

“And neither do I!” Kara yelled.

Silence.

Tears started gathering in Kara’s eyes at a rapid pace. She didn’t want Lena to look at her with pity, so she averted her gaze.

It didn’t matter now anyway. It was clear this wasn’t going to change anything.

“Look, Lena,” Kara whispered, “I’ve made my mistakes. Not telling you was certainly one of them, but I have never not trusted you.”

“How can you say that?” Lena asked, voice pained. “We worked together so many times. I’ve saved your life tens of times. Why not tell me then?

“I have always tried to be there for you, Lena,” Kara said, looking Lena in the eyes. “Both as Kara Danvers and as Supergirl. I never for a moment believed you were like your family. You are good, and kind and – ”

“Don’t,” Lena forced out. “Just. Don’t.”

“No, Lena,” Kara said, “you wanted to know, so I’m telling you. I was suspicious of you, the first day we met, right before I was supposed to interview you. I was nervous, I was scared.”

She regarded Lena curiously.

“Did I ever tell you how terrified I was of Lex Luthor when I was only fifteen years old?”

Lena didn’t look at her, but her fingers on her wine glass tensed.

“I was watching television, and there he was,” Kara laughed without a trace of happiness in her voice at the memory. “He said, right there on live TV in my cosy living room, that my cousin, that _I_ was dangerous. That I should be put in a cage. That they should develop weapons to hunt me down, and kill me.”

Lena looked up at her, but didn’t interrupt.

Kara’s eyes were dry now. It was like the memory of the awfulness of the situation prevented her from feeling anything other than hurt. She remembered the deep-seated fear. The terror when her cousin was struck down on television by Lex in one of his Lexosuits.

She shivered.

“Eliza turned it off, of course, but the damage was done. I was scared Lex Luthor was going to come by my house and kidnap me.”

Lena flinched.

“You know,” Kara said, staring off into the distance, “there was a time I was absolutely petrified of him. I didn’t want to go visit my cousin in Metropolis, because I was sure Lex was going to sniff me out, and kill me.”

Kara shook her head. The memories of her hiding in Alex’ bed, eyes trained on the window, just in case Lex would break into her house through her window like the villains in Kim Possible.

“I didn’t want to go with Clark to interview you. In fact, I almost ran out of your building twice,” Kara let out a laugh that sounded more like a sob. “And then I met you.”

Her eyes met Lena’s, and all of a sudden Kara felt so sure of what she had to say. She knew what words to say, because she’d never been unsure about Lena. She just had to tell her.

“I had more reasons than anybody else to walk away from you; to be scared of you. But I couldn’t. Because you,” she smiled, “you were warm, and kind, and right from the second you looked into my eyes, I _knew_ ,” she emphasised, “I knew that you were nothing like your family. That you were someone I would want to be friends with. You were amazing, Lena,” Kara laughed, “you were charming and perfect, and I never doubted you for a second after.”

Lena’s lip trembled.

“Our friendship was never a manipulation or a betrayal, Lena,” Kara urged. “It was – ” she searched for a word that could describe the wonder and enchantment of their friendship coming into existence, “spontaneous. It was unplanned.”

Kara felt tears well up in her eyes again, but they were happy tears this time.

“Lena, I never meant to betray you. I didn’t even try to,” she said, shaking her head. “I never planned for our friendship to happen, but I am so, _so_ grateful that it did. Because it is one of the best things that ever happened to me.”

Lena swallowed hard.

“I know you don’t believe me,” Kara sighed, gently folding her hands on her lap, “and I don’t know how to convince you. All I can say that everything from visiting you in your office, to saving you from Hank Hanshaw – ” Lena’s eyes hardened at the memory. “It was all because I wanted to. Not because there was some sort of master plan at hand there,” she spoke softly. “Not because I was using you.”

Lena’s eyes were sparkling with tears, but refused to overflow. Lena didn’t bother to wipe them away either.

“I didn’t tell you my secret, and I’m sorry for that, Lena,” Kara promised. “I know I should’ve told you sooner, but I kept chickening out. I kept finding reasons not to tell you. Fear, being the main one. Fear that you would hate me. But,”

And Lena frowned at the ‘but.’

“I’m also not sorry,” Kara sighed. “Because the moments I spent with you as just Kara, were so precious to me. Everybody else treats me differently because of who I am. You accepted mousy, boring, little Kara into your world, and I didn’t have to try to impress you.”

Kara wiped away a stray tear with just the pad of her thumb.

“I didn’t have to fly to Paris and get you some croissants to make you like me,” Kara laughed tearily. “I didn’t have to punch a whole in a wall to impress you, you just liked me, as me.”

A rough whimper passed Lena’s lips, but she didn’t speak.

“I treasured our time together, Lena,” Kara vowed, “and no matter how much I wish I could turn back time and tell you about my secret sooner, I’m also so grateful I got to be your friend, without constantly having to wonder if you were only my friend because of my abilities.”

Her tears were falling freely now, but Kara didn’t care anymore.

For a moment, that was all that needed to be said between the two of them. They let the words sink in. Kara felt more at peace, knowing she’d said everything she’d had to say months ago. Things that might’ve prevented the entire onslaught of feelings. Lena stared right into her eyes, a storm of feelings brewing inside of her.

Then, Lena looked away. She was gazing into the distance, the wheels in her head turning at full speed.

Kara felt Lena’s indecision, her anger and her frustration, and she would patiently wait for what Lena had to say.

Except… Lena didn’t have anything to say. Not for a long time. She was staring at the table, staring at her still half-filled glass of wine, but she wasn’t looking at Kara. She didn’t bother to address the waitress who came to take their plates away. And with every second that passed, Kara felt more defeated.

She’d spilled her gut to Lena. She’d been honest, like she should’ve been, way before that. She’d done everything she could, as well as she possibly could’ve… Yet, Lena didn’t say a word.

After a full five minutes of silence, Kara gave up. She let out a quiet sob, that seemingly went unnoticed by Lena, but Kara was pretty sure she was just not acknowledging it.

“This isn’t going to work out, is it?” she asked, but it was a rhetorical question. She didn’t need Lena to answer it; she already knew what the answer was.

“Kara,” Lena started softly, but her eyes still weren’t meeting Kara’s.

“It’s okay, Lena,” Kara said, grabbing her coat from the chair next to her, and standing up.

That did grab Lena’s attention. Her head snapped up, and her eyes bewilderedly registered all of Kara’s movements.

“Wait, what?”

“Lena,” Kara whispered tiredly, “it’s okay. It’s clear to me now that this isn’t something we can overcome. We can just split as friends. It’s okay.”

“Wait, no,” Lena said, but Kara had already placed enough money on the table to cover their lunch and a twenty per cent tip.

“It’s okay, Lena,” Kara smiled a small smile. “It was good to see you again. And I’m glad we finally talked.”

“Kara,” Lena protested, trying to get up from her seat.

“Goodbye Lena,” Kara whispered. And then she was out the door.

It hadn’t stopped raining outside, but at least it had sizzled down to a mere drizzle. That, Kara could deal with. She hastily buttoned her baby pink coat, her fingers struggling to complete the single task. Her tears were making her eyesight blurry, but blinking them away like she usually did didn’t help.

Kara set a brisk pace, wanting to get away from the café, away from Lena, as fast as possible. She couldn’t get out there fast enough.

Her footsteps echoed on the pavement, aching to just set off, and fly up into the air. Just a two more blocks, then she could change in the alley and fly away. Just two more blocks.

But then –

“Kara!”

Kara frowned but didn’t turn around. She had to have imagined –

“Kara!”

Kara came to a standstill when a cold hand gripped her shoulder. She turned around and found Lena, her face flushed, her eyes teary, and her entire body panting. Her coat was half thrown over her shoulder, only one arm in a sleeve.

“Lena? What are you – ”

“I’m sorry!” Lena exclaimed. “I’m so goddamn sorry, I’m sorry – ”

She was so out of breath that the last words came out voicelessly, while her hand leaned heavily on Kara’s shoulder.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Kara said, fearing Lena might faint if she tried to apologise even more. “It’s – hey, it’s okay.”

Lena nodded, slowly regaining her bearings. Her left hand, the hand that wasn’t on Kara’s shoulder, went to her side, rubbing the pain away.

Once Lena had calmed a bit, Kara carefully tried to probe again.

“Lena? Are you ok – ”

“Don’t leave,” Lena begged.

“O-kay?”

“I mean it,” Lena said pleadingly. “I’m sorry, I was an ass. You forgave me so easily for what I did to you in CatCo, and now I ruin things again by lashing out at you. I keep messing up. I keep – I can’t even – I’m sorry, Kara. I’m sorry that I keep asking you to forgive me. I’m sorry it’s always you. I’m sorry you always have to be the bigger person. I’m sorry I got mad – I,” she took a wet breath. “I’m _so_ sorry, Kara.”

“Well,” Kara answered wryly, “to be fair, you did warn me my secret was like a red flag to you.”

Lena didn’t smile.

“That doesn’t excuse anything, Kara,” she said. “I want to be in your life, so badly, and I just can’t seem to show you. I’m sorry, I – I just can’t lose you. I don’t want you to walk away again. Ever.”

Kara was speechless.

“Look, I can’t tell you I get why – why,” a sob wrecked through her body, and Kara instinctively took her hand in hers. Encouraged, Lena went on. “I don’t get why you didn’t tell me earlier, but I’m willing to trust that you had your reasons, okay?” Lena begged. “I’m willing to trust in you. Because I do! Trust you, that is. I just – please don’t leave. I know I treated you terribly, and I left, and you have every reason t – please don’t leave. I love you, Kara. So, so much. I’ll be better. I’ll be better. I promise I’ll be better,” she babbled.

Lena started crying in earnest, and Kara was almost too shocked to do anything. Sure she’d seen Lena tear up a couple of times. But this, though, this was different. Lena with red puffy eyes, mascara stains and messy lipstick was a sight to behold. She looked like tragedy and drama and sadness all at once.

It broke Kara’s heart in a billion pieces.

Kara quickly drew Lena close. Lena’s hands found their place on her shoulders, while Kara pulled Lena close by her jacket, feeling, until she found Lena’s back, and gripped tight.

“It’s okay,” Kara whispered, still stunned. Her hand found the tips of Lena’s black hair, slightly tangled under Kara’s fingertips due to the rain. “It’s okay.”

“I can’t lose you, Kara. I can’t. I’m sorry,” Lena cried.

“No,” Kara whispered. “You won’t.”

“I love you, Kara,” Lena whispered in her hair. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Kara promised, but somehow that only made Lena sob harder.

Kara didn’t let go. People passed, and threw them weird looks, but Kara ignored every single one of them. Let them stare, she thought. They wouldn’t understand. They wouldn’t understand.  
  


* * *

  
“So,” Alex said casually, “new earrings then?”

Kara’s hand unconsciously found its way to the string of diamond drooping from her earlobe.

“Oh, yeah,” she smiled. “Andrea gave them to me yesterday.”

Alex nodded slowly. “That’s nice of her,” she commented carefully.

Kara caught on to the note of _something_ in Alex’ voice. It wasn’t exactly contempt, but it wasn’t enthusiasm either.

Kara sighed. “You have anything to say about that, Alex?”

Alex slung her arm over Kelly’s shoulders.

“No,” she said innocently. “Not really.”

“Uhu,” Kara frowned disbelievingly.

When Alex didn’t say anything more, Kara just shrugged and took one of the donuts of the plate in front of them.

“I mean – ” Alex started, and Kara inwardly rolled her eyes. She knew it.

“What, Alex?”

“Yeah,” Kelly looked questioningly up at Alex. “What’s wrong, babe?”

“Well, I just,” she huffed, running a hand through her short hair, thereby letting Kelly go. “Don’t you think it’s kind of a big gift?” Alex asked carefully.

“Yeah,” Kara responded self-consciously. “So?”

“Don’t you think it’s a bit soon to give your girlfriend a gift that’s worth a couple of thousand dollars?”

Kara rolled her eyes. “They’re not worth a couple of thousand dollars, Alex.”

“Well,” Kelly piped up, and the two Danvers sisters turned to look at her. “Not to pick sides here,” she continued, slightly uncomfortable with the intense eyes of the Danvers girls on her, “but those earrings are from the new Tiffany’s Victoria Diamond line.”

“Okay,” Kara said slowly. “What does that mean?”

“Well,” Kelly said, “it means those earrings are worth around twenty thousand grant. Give or take.”

Kara’s eyes widened comically.

“What?” she exclaimed.

“What?” Alex agreed.

“Oh my God, oh my God, ohmygodohmygodohmygod.”

Kara quickly started pulling at the little locks behind her earlobes.

“Kara?” Alex asked.

“Get these off me, get these off me!” Kara yelled hysterically. “I’m the most clumsy person in history and I’m wearing twenty thousand dollars worth of diamonds in my ears! What if I fly into a building, and I drop my earring? Then I will have lost ten thousand dollars!”

Alex’ deer-in-headlights look seemed to confirm Kara’s suspicions that she was the least suitable person on earth to be bestowed those kind of earrings, and she quickly jumped up to help.

“You guys,” Kelly tried, but it was to no use. The Danvers sisters were pulling on the earrings as if the devil were chasing them.

With a sigh, Kelly stood up from her comfy spot on Kara’s couch to join her girlfriend.

“There,” Alex said triumphantly, having successfully taken off one of the earring’s locks. “Now we just have to take out the earring and lock it away somewhere for safekeeping.”

“Babe,” Kelly tried, placing one of her hands on Alex’ shoulder, “don’t you think Andrea’s going to be a little disappointed if Kara’s not wearing her gift on their date?”

Kara’s head jerked up. “You’re right,” she gasped. “Andy will be so sad!”

‘Andy?’ Alex mouthed to Kelly, face scrunched up in disgust.

Kelly shrugged, but smiled endearingly at Kara.

“Alex,” Kara said frantically, turning on her heel so fast it made Alex dizzy, “I need to put the earring back in, come on!”

Alex sighed and rolled her eyes, but got back to work anyway. Five seconds later, Kara was sporting her beautiful earrings once again.

“If I just don’t move at all, the earring should stay put, right?” Kara asked nervously, protectively cupping her ears.

“Kara,” Kelly reassured, “you’ll be fine, I promise! They won’t just fall out, okay?”

“Okay,” Kara whispered, slowly bringing her hands down.

“So where’s she taking you tonight?” Kelly asked, trying to distract Kara. She sat back down and pulled Alex down next to her to cuddle.

“Well,” Kara said, walking into her bedroom, “I think she’s taking me to another fancy restaurant, which means – ”

She walked out of her bedroom with seven different dresses in her arms.

“I’m going to need your help picking out an outfit.”

Alex threw her head back and groaned. “But I don’t wanna – awtch!”

She yelped when Kelly stomped her shoulder, and looked at her girlfriend in utter betrayal.

“What the hell was that for?”

“Your sister needs help,” Kelly scolded. She turned back to Kara with a soft smile. “Okay, what are your options?”

Kara exhaled in relief.

“Well,” she started, but just then, a knock on the door interrupted Kara.

Alex frowned. “Is Andrea early?”

Kara looked through the door and beamed. “Nope,” she said, and went to open the door.

“Hi,” Lena smiled nervously, “thanks again for inviting me.”

“Of course,” Kara grinned, taking a step aside so Lena could walk in.

Immediately, Alex shot up from her seat, and crossed her arms, trying to come off as threatening as possible.

“What’s she doing here?” she asked with no small amount of hostility in her voice.

“I invited her,” Kara said simply and skipped back into the living room. “I told her everybody was meeting Andrea, and I wanted her to be there too.”

“When did that happen?” Alex hissed to Kara.

“When I ran into her earlier this week,” Kara said simply.

“What?” Alex asked. “You didn’t tell me that.”

“I didn’t know you wanted to know I had lunch on Monday,” Kara said. “If it helps, I had lunch today too.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it,” Alex said, not taking her eyes off Lena.

Kara rolled her eyes. “Relax,” she whispered. “Lena’s my friend, okay? I want her to be here to meet Andrea. Can you be cool? Please? For me?”

Alex glared at Lena, who rolled her eyes in response, but looked uncomfortable with the situation. She stood stiffly behind the couch, purse clutched in her hands, as if she was considering dashing out of the apartment.

Kelly threw Alex a look.

“Hi Lena,” she said with a smile, completely ignoring the conversation between the Danvers’ sisters. “We’re so glad to have you.”

The remark was pointed not only at Lena, but at Alex too. Eventually Alex rolled her eyes, and sighed overdramatically.

“Fine,” she whispered to Kelly, “but she better have brought some scotch.”

“Well,” Lena said, pulling out a nice bottle of Van Horne single Malt, “will this do?”

Alex’s face brightened instantly, anger long forgotten. She jumped up from the couch, snatched the bottle from Lena’s hands and took it into the kitchen to open it.

“Alex!” Kara and Kelly admonished her.

“What?” Alex asked defensively. “She offered.”

Lena laughed quietly. “It’s fine, guys, really. I brought it hoping someone would appreciate it.”

Alex sighed, licking her lips. The golden liquid swirled in one of Kara’s only scotch glasses. “Someone sure is,” she said appreciatively.

Kara rolled her eyes but decided to let it pass.

“Ehm, Kara,” Lena turned to Kara, “I thought you said Sam was coming, too?”

“Oh yeah, she’s just running late,” Kara assured.

“Oh.” Lena paused. “And when’s Andrea supposed to arrive?”

Kara groaned. “She’ll be here in ten minutes. I told her she’d get to meet everybody, and then we could grab dinner.”

Lena’s brow furrowed. “So what’s the problem?”

“I haven’t found out what I should wear! And this one – ” she glared at Alex, “has been no help whatsoever.”

Alex just toasted her glass in the air.

“I can help,” Lena offered. “Where is she taking you?”

“Some fancy new Italian Restaurant near Petunia Avenue,” Kara said.

Kelly’s eyebrows went up. “Wait,” she asked, “you don’t mean Il Castello Bianco?”

Kara snapped her fingers. “That’s the one.”

Kelly and Lena exchanged a look, before turning back to Kara.

“What options do you have?”

Kara smiled, dashed into her bedroom and came back fifteen seconds later, dressed in her professional dark chino’s and a pink blouse.

“This is my usual kind of outfit?” she twirled on her feet to show Kelly and Lena. “I usually wear it to work, but it’s classy, right?”

Her hopeful look was so endearing, that Lena couldn’t help but smile softly. “While I love the outfit, darling, I’m afraid it might be a little underdress-y for that particular restaurant.”

“Oh,” Kara frowned, and her shoulders slumped. “Nuts.”

“But, that’s only the first outfit you’ve shown us,” Kelly helpfully interjected. “What else have you got?”

Kara hummed thoughtfully before her face brightened.

“I’ve got it!” she yelled out before once again rushing into her bedroom.

“Oh boy,” Alex sighed, handing Kelly a glass of red wine, and Lena a glass of scotch with only a mere scowl on her face, which Lena found to be a considerable improvement. She looked at Kelly and leaned back comfortably in the couch. As long as Alex’ girlfriend was here, Lena had nothing to fear.

Kara walked back in in a dress so ridiculously Barbie pink that it almost hurt Lena’s eyes just by looking at it.

“Well?” she asked hopefully.

“Eh…”

Kara’s face fell. “Oh no, what’s wrong with this one?”

“It’s just – ”

“Not the restaurant’s style,” Lena cut Kelly off.

“Oh,” Kara looked dejected. “Well, I’ll see what else I’ve got lying around but… I don’t have that many fancy – oh wait!”

Kara face brightened, and she dashed into her room before returning with a huge cardboard box with the words CatCo gifts written on it.

“This is a box of old things Cat got that she didn’t want. She told me to keep them, but the stuff was all so fancy I never actually got to use them,” Kara explained.

“You have a box full of expensive clothing and gadgets and you never told me?” Alex asked disbelievingly. “Are you my sister, or what?”

Kara rolled her eyes, and got down on her knees, pulling the box open and pulling out one fancy item of clothing after the other.

“No way,” Alex’ eyes lit up at the sight of a designer black leather jacket. “I call dibs!”

“Alex!” Kelly chastised, but Kara didn’t even look up, she just made a vague hand movement, which Alex interpreted as an affirmative.

“Yes,” she whispered, putting the jacket on and admiring her own arms. “Now, this,” she looked up grinning, “this is exactly what I need.”

“Aha!” Kara exclaimed when she got to the dresses. “I knew I hadn’t imagined these.”

She triumphantly held up a blue backless dress with a V-neck so deep, it made her blush just thinking of wearing it in public. She pulled out dress after dress, handing them Kelly and Lena who inspected them with a critical eye.

“Try this one on,” Kelly suggested.

When Kara was finally in a new dress, a golden number, which was quite modest compared to some other dresses in the box, but still wasn’t quite right.

“Okay,” Kara looked between Kelly and Lena with a disappointed frown, “what’s wrong with this one?”

“It makes you look like a golden lollypop,” Alex helpfully suggested inbetween sips.

“Yes, thank you, Alex,” Lena said dryly.

“Happy to help,” Alex muttered against the rim of her glass.

“Okay guys,” Kara said defeated, pulling the dress over her head, “I’m all out of ideas.”

She folded the dress, and stood up straight. Kara crossed her arms over her chest, naked but for her lily blue panties, and white, daisy-patterned bra.

“First the dresses aren’t fancy enough, then they’re fancy but they just don’t look good on me…” She sank down onto one of the unoccupied couches. “I don’t know what to wear anymore.”

“Oh come on, Kara,” Kelly said encouragingly. “I’m sure we can find you something perfect. Right, Lena?”

When no answer came, Kelly turned to Lena. “Lena?”

But Lena wasn’t listening. Her cheeks were tinted pink, and she was looking extremely flustered, eyes glazed over. Her lips were pursed together, and her hands clutched the fabric of the couch so tightly her knuckles had gone white.

“Lena?”

“What?” Lena jerked up.

“I just said Kara would find the right dress, right?” Kelly asked, taken aback.

“Oh, yeah, sure. Absolutely. No doubt,” Lena said, sinking deeper into the couch’s pillows.

Kara frowned at Lena’s behaviour, but decided to let it slide.

They were in a weird place right now. They’d finally talked about the whole Supergirl thing, which Kara considered to be long overdue. But had it really fixed anything? Lena was still hurt; Kara couldn’t take that away. But Lena had also apologised. For everything. Not that that made anything easier for Kara.

But Lena was here. She was here, and she was being supportive. She wanted to be involved in Kara’s life, and even though the hurt was still so palpable… Kara had missed her so, so much.

Even now, seeing Lena back on her couch, squeezed next to Kelly and Alex. It was indescribable. It felt as if a piece of her apartment had gone missing in Lena’s absence, and now her home was whole again. Lena was back. She was back, and she was trying.

And Kara needed her best friend. Even more so now when Alex was being weird about Andrea. Kara needed a friend she could gush to about Andrea. A friend she could confide all her secrets to. And dear Rao if that wasn’t Lena.

So maybe Kara’s forgiveness rested a lot on the fact that she couldn’t _not_ have Lena in her life. She needed her in a way she never though she would need another human being. Well, aside from Alex, but somehow, Kara found Lena and Alex to be in two different categories of people she needed. Even though she considered them both family. And they were both amazing, powerful women she could rely on.

Huh.

After a couple more tries, each one making Lena’s face pink up a little more, they finally settled on a cute, black Chanel dress that was fancy enough for the restaurant, sexy enough so Kara wouldn’t feel like an absolute potato next to Andrea, and just cute enough to still radiate a lot of Sunny Danvers energy.

“Okay,” Kara said, twirling in a circle before her friends. “All done.”

Alex had done her hair – she was really good at that. Had been since they were kids. For a long time, Alex was the only one who was allowed to braid Kara’s hair, or put it in complicated updos they’d seen in magazines and tried to recreate themselves. Kara loved the tight bun with the princess braid around it that Alex had so expertly fashioned for her date.

“Okay, now,” Kara turned to Alex, “Andrea’s going to be here any minute, and I need you to promise me something.”

Alex shrugged. “Yeah, sure. What is it?”

Kara’s eyes narrowed and she took a step closer to Alex, trying to summon the darkest, most intimidating part of herself.

“When she gets here,” Kara waggled her finger at Alex, “I’m going to need you to be on your best behaviour, you hear me? I don’t want any snide remarks, no eyerolling, and,” she said, snatching a fresh glass of whiskey out of Alex’s hand – who had already broken rule number two, to absolutely no one’s surprise, “no alcoholism.”

“Hey!” Alex said indignantly. “Why am I the only one getting a scolding? Lena drinks just as much as I do.”

“True,” Lena conceded, “but I do it with more class.”

“Why you little – ”

Luckily, there was a knock on the door before Alex could finish her insult.

“Oh God, it’s Andrea,” Kara whispered, nervously straightening her dress.

“Kara,” Kelly said sweetly, “you look amazing. Don’t worry, okay?”

Kara nodded, and shot Kelly a small smile before making her way over to the door.

Kara hesitated for two seconds, all too aware that the others were paying close attention to what she was doing. She didn’t want to appear too nervous. She didn’t want to make them think that Andrea made her nervous. Because she didn’t. Well, she did, but in a good way. A making butterflies appear in her tummy kind of way. The sort of nerves you got, waiting for the ride to start on a rollercoaster. The anticipation, the adrenaline, the expectations… that was Andrea to Kara.

Kara took a deep breath, and opened the door. And almost instantly, she didn’t feel nervous anymore.

Andrea was dressed in a beautiful checked, black and white dress. Oh good, Kara thought relieved, at least they matched, dress wise.

“Kara,” Andrea said softly.

Kara’s name had never been pronounced so elegantly, so absolutely reverently, as if she was precious, holy, almost unattainable. It made Kara feel all warm and fluttery inside.

A bright smile adorned Andrea’s face as she took her girlfriend’s hands in hers. “You look absolutely gorgeous.” Her eyes were shining so brightly, and her smile made Kara’s stomach turn ten times over. Dear Rao that woman was beautiful.

Andrea took a small step closer, her eyes asking for permission. When Kara’s own eyes fluttered close, Andrea took that chance to press their lips together sweetly. No rush. No extreme, over the top passion, just a small, gigantic feeling of love put into one small kiss.

Kara melted on the spot.

She let her lips glide from Andrea’s lips to her cheeks, where she pressed tiny kisses, until she was close to Andrea’s ear.

“You ready to meet my insane sister?”

Andrea laughed, and Kara loved that she could feel that laugh reverberate in her own chest.

“Bring it on,” Andrea challenged, and tickled Kara’s sides.

Kara laughed, and took Andrea’s hand. She led her girlfriend – yes, girlfriend – over to the others.

“Alex, Kelly, Lena, this,” she looked up lovingly at Andrea, “is Andrea Rojas. My girlfriend,” she beamed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys!
> 
> Sorry for the late update! I know I was supposed to update on the seventeenth but well, you know, I didn't. But the update's here now! Just in time for the new Supergirl episode!!
> 
> I'd just like to say, for all those who still watch Supergirl and thought my version of Lena was too harsh, and mean…. At least my Lena didn't put Kara in a block of ice with Kryptonite. Just fyi. Just kidding, it was horrible to see, and I promise the Lena in this story would never ever do something like that.
> 
> I hope you guys all liked the story. 
> 
> Next chapter will have a lot of Andrea interacting with the group, so drama abound!
> 
> Until next time!


	10. Chapter 10

_“Alex, Kelly, Lena, this,” she looked up lovingly at Andrea, “is Andrea Rojas. My girlfriend,” she beamed._

A chorus of hello’s rose up from the group, along with one suspicious glare from Alex.

“And Andrea,” Kara continued, “this is my sister Alex,” Alex nodded curtly, “her girlfriend Kelly,” Kelly smiled broadly at Andrea, “and my best friend in the entire world, Lena Luthor.”

Andrea’s eyes widened at when she heard Lena’s name. Her eyes locked with Lena’s, and she smiled knowingly.

“Lena Luthor,” she said, “it’s been a while.”

“Yes,” Lena said dryly, “since your graduation, if I’m correct.”

“You probably are,” Andrea agreed. “You look good. I heard you’d taken over Luthor Corp.”

“L-Corp, actually,” Lena corrected coolly, a smile painted on her lips.

“My mistake,” Andrea smiled back. “You seem to have done well for yourself.”

Lena accepted the compliment with a tight smile.

“Likewise,” she said. “Rojas fashion industries is thriving, I heard.”

“Well,” Andrea said, “I’d by lying if I said we aren’t doing better than expected. But it’d be hubris of me to say that I’m the only one to thank for that. My team truly deserves all the praise there is, and definitely shares in the success.”

“I’m sure,” Lena said snidely.

Andrea moved on, and her eyes quickly found Alex’s. Kara felt herself stiffen when the tense air filled the space around her.

“So,” Alex said, standing up and squaring her shoulders, “you’re the woman who’s been dating my sister.”

“Alex,” Kara warned, but Alex ignored her.

To her credit, Andrea didn’t move a muscle. She looked completely at ease, even when she was being out-alpha’d by Alex.

“That would be me,” Andrea said. She turned to Kara and raised her eyebrows. “Unless there’s some other girlfriend that I’m not aware of?”

Kara rolled her eyes over-exaggeratedly. “You know very well there’s not. I’ll send you a memo if that changes.”

“How considerate of you,” Andrea laughed and kissed Kara’s temple. Kara could just burst from happiness. Alex, for her part, didn’t look impressed at all.

“Do you often flirt with vulnerable reporters who then turn into girlfriends?” Alex asked snidely.

“Alex!”

This time though, the; ‘Alex,’ was called out rather indignantly by Kelly Olsen herself. Alex didn’t let it distract her though. But neither did Andrea.

“No,” she said, shooting Kara a loving look, “this was definitely a first.”

Kara smiled warmly, and cast her eyes down, but not before shooting imaginary lasers at Alex and mouthing: ‘you promised.’

Kara and Andrea sat down in the couch facing Kelly, Alex and Lena.

“This is cosy,” Andrea said after a beat. “I love that you guys meet up so often.”

“Yeah, Kara always insists on getting everyone together to celebrate literally everything,” Alex said.

“Really,” Andrea said, turning to Kara with a smile. “That’s adorable, darling.”

Andrea leaned in closer and –

“Excuse me,” Lena said, standing up and walking to the kitchen.

Kara turned to follow her with her eyes, and Andrea’s kiss landed on her cheek. Kara absentmindedly stroked Andrea’s hand as an apology, but shot Alex a worried look. Alex just responded with a vague ‘I don’t know,’ gesture, which was absolutely useless.

Before Kara could ask if anything was the matter, someone knocked on her door.

“Is that Sam?” Kara asked.

Alex’s face lit up.

“Well tell her to come in,” she said impatiently.

“I’ll get it,” Lena said, strolling over to open the door.

Lena had just barely turned the doorknob before –

“Sorry, sorry I’m late!” A dishevelled looking Sam rushed through the door, cheeks flushed. “Ruby’s parent-teacher night ran long, and I couldn’t get out of there, I’m so sorry! Man, I swear I’m not always late to things.”

She quickly embraced Lena before going over to the couch and hugging Kara. The outside cold hung around Sam like a frosty aura, and hit Kara’s cheeks when they hugged.

“Thanks for inviting me,” Sam said sincerely.

“Of course,” Kara smiled, “you’re family!”

Sam smiled, and turned to Andrea.

“Hi,” she said, shaking Andrea’s hand, “you must be Andrea. I’ve heard so much about you.”

“All good I hope,” Andrea grinned.

Sam laughed, but Kara was sure that it had not been “all good.” Especially if Sam had gotten her information from Alex.

Kara bit her lip anxiously. This had to work out. It had to. Andrea was so great… surely the others would see that too, right?

Sam went to sit down next to Alex and hugged her close.

“It’s so good to see you!” Sam said, one hand on Alex’s lower back, the other on her neck.

“You too,” Alex said softly. Her hands were gripping Sam’s sweater like she was afraid that if she let go, Sam would disappear into a cloud of smoke. Sam didn’t seem to mind the tightness, though. She smiled into Alex’ neck, and closed her eyes for a second, just enjoying being in Alex’ vicinity again.

Sam only let go when she opened her eyes again, and caught Kelly’s smile.

“Hi Kelly,” Sam murmured, a slight blush on her cheeks. “Nice to see you again.”

“You too,” Kelly replied sweetly.

Her gaze flickered from Sam to Alex. A look of confusion passed over her face, but was quickly replaced with her authentic, warm Kelly smile.

“So Kara,” Kelly asked, and Kara turned to face her. “Why isn’t Nia here? She doesn’t strike me as the type who would casually decline an invite to meet your new girlfriend.”

Kara laughed. “No she is not. She had to work on an article tonight,” Kara explained. “She was very upset she wouldn’t be able to attend tonight’s ‘meet and greet’.”

“Well,” Andrea said, putting her arms around Kara’s shoulders, “there’ll be other times, right?”

“Definitely,” Kara beamed.

The fact that Andrea seemed to be so completely convinced that there would be other times she’d be able to meet her friends sent Kara over the moon. Andrea wasn’t looking for an out yet. She wasn’t scared off, yet.

Now she just had to keep it that way.

“Can I get you anything to drink?” Kara asked sweetly.

“Well, I thought I spotted a rather nice looking bottle of whiskey back in the kitchen.” Andrea raised her eyebrows. “Is that up for grabs?”

Kara laughed. “Yeah, but you have to share with Alex, otherwise she gets crabby.”

“I do not,” Alex retorted indignantly.

“Do too.”

Kara stuck out her tongue at Alex and made her way to the kitchen. She wanted to use her superspeed to pour the drink and be back by Andrea’s side in under a second to make sure Alex couldn’t say or do anything to upset her, but she knew she couldn’t. While she definitely had strong feelings towards Andrea, she hadn’t known the woman long enough to divulge her biggest secret.

Although…

Kara bit her lip and her hand stilled on the bottle.

If her fight with Lena had taught her anything, it was not to keep up the ruse of “normal, bland Kara Danvers” for too long. The consequences could be catastrophic.

Kara shook her head. She didn’t have to think about it for the moment. She and Andrea hadn’t been together for very long. Right now, all she needed to focus on was letting her feelings for Andrea blossom, and see where they were headed.

And she had to focus on Lena.

Kara raised her head, and allowed herself the privilege of stealing a glance at her friends on the couch.

They were making small talk, Andrea conversing with Kelly in her trademark elegant, businesswoman way. Kara was quickly getting used to that side of Andrea. When they were in restaurants, ordering food, Andrea spoke to the personnel that way. When they were walking down the street and Andrea encountered a business partner, her attitude would change completely. Her tone would be serious, her smiles would be glossy, and her words would be carefully measured.

It never failed to entrance Kara. How a person could so deftly transform from one persona to the next was incredulous.

But Kelly seemed to be well versed in the way of making small talk too. She smiled and laughed at Andrea’s stories, implementing the necessary comments and thoughts where needed.

Andrea was talking about her latest business-meeting blunder. Kara had heard the tale before, so she recognised all of Andrea’s frustrated and hilarious expressions. Kelly listened attentively, and Kara felt a surge of affection for Kelly inside her. Kelly was so wonderfully helpful and supportive, and she knew just what to say and do to make Andrea feel welcome. Kara could only smile, seeing Kelly’s efforts.

Her eyes drifted to where Sam and Alex were huddled closely together on one of the couches. They were turned towards each other, knees touching, and Sam was gesturing wildly, recounting a story of Ruby’s soccer team in Metropolis. Alex practically hung from Sam’s lips, trying to absorb every word of the story.

“And then she just punched the guy!”

“Yeah! Go Ruby!” Alex cheered.

“No!” Sam admonished, but she was laughing too. “Not good, Alex! Not good!”

“Why? Did she forget to tuck her thumb?”

“No! Not good because a thirteen-year-old shouldn’t punch her soccer coach!”

“He made her teammate cry! Ruby did exactly what I would do,” Alex said proudly.

“Yes that’s exactly what I’m worried about,” Sam teased and Alex laughed, bumping her head against Sam’s in the process which just made them laugh more.

Either Lena had heard the story already, and already knew the outcome, or she was very much not mentally with them at the party. Her eyes were glassy, like her mind had drifted off somewhere else. One of her lips rested against the wine glass in her hand, but she never made a move to take a sip. While Alex laughed along to Sam’s revelation that Ruby had scored? Won an argument? Kara didn’t actually know, she’d stopped following the story after Alex had started laughing like crazy – Lena just leaned back, not reacting to Sam’s story in the least. Not that Sam seemed to mind. Her attention was focussed solely on whether Alex reacted appropriately or not. And judging by the gigantic grin on her face, she was pretty satisfied with Alex’ reaction.

Just then, Lena’s eyes moved up, and locked with Kara’s. Kara was so taken aback that she actually dropped one of the ice cubes she meant to put in Andrea’s glass on the floor.

Red-faced, she kicked it somewhere else, hoping and praying to Rao that Lena hadn’t noticed. But either Lena had seen and didn’t care, or she just didn’t see Kara’s embarrassing moment in the first place. She looked just as relaxed as she did before, just a bit more alert. Lena looked at her for a while; her eyes more fixed than they were when Sam was talking.

Kara’s hand stiffened on the bottle, completely frozen, like she’d forgotten why she’d come to the kitchen, and had grabbed the bottle in the first place. She felt the chill of the glass bottle under her fingertips. Too late, she realised she’d held an ice cube in her hand for longer than she should. Water trailed between her fingers, yet Kara couldn’t find it in herself to care, or to even look down.

Her eyes were still locked with Lena’s, and for a split second, it felt like there was only Lena and her.

Just Lena, in her apartment, like so many times before. Sipping a glass of wine, telling Kara about her day while Kara cooked something up in the kitchen, listening to Lena’s soothing voice.

It felt like any other Tuesday.

Kara couldn’t say why, but she suddenly felt as if Lena felt the exact same way, remembering the meet-ups after long workdays, just basking in each other’s presence.

Maybe it was the way Lena’s eyes looked more longing than they had in weeks, or maybe it was the way her entire face had softened, almost begging for the world to slow down, so they could pretend. Pretend for just one more minute that things were like before, like it was just another Tuesday. Like it was just the two of them. Like nothing had gone wrong between the two of them.

Like there was no Supergirl.

No Lex.

No secrets.

And then Lena smiled.

It was a soft smile. Loving, caring, and yet there was a sense of melancholy about it.

Like they both knew the world wouldn’t slow down for the two of them, no matter how much they wished it to. Like the moment would pass, and they would be pulled into a reality where those Tuesdays were in the past, and where their evenings would never be like before again.

Kara smiled back. Like she was trying to communicate to Lena: “Yes, I know we can’t get those times back. But we can create new moments. New memories. New Tuesdays. I’m still prepared to do that.”

Kara didn’t know if her thoughts were well translated into her one tiny smile, but when Lena’s smile widened, she couldn’t help but think that it had.

Lena’s eyes twinkled, and Kara had to bite her lip to keep from grinning. She didn’t care that it might all be in her head. She was sure Lena and her were having their own secret conversation from across the room, and no one else could understand them, or try and deduce what they were saying and feeling.

Just when Kara was ready to lean down onto the wooden kitchen counter, sighing like one of those princesses waiting for their princes in those old Disney movies, the spell was broken.

“Kara? How’s that drink coming along?”

Kara startled, and immediately stood up straight, spilling some of the whiskey on the counter. She cringed, knowing full well that Lena only brought the really expensive stuff she could never afford.

“It’s coming!” Kara managed to croak out, quickly pouring the drink and trying to locate a rag to mop up the spilled booze.

When she looked up, she saw that Andrea was staring at her. Well, not right at her, but more between her and the bottle. She looked puzzled. Her eyes drifted from where she was standing, almost following Kara’s previous line of sight. Right. To. Lena.

Kara felt her stomach tighten, and she didn’t understand why. She felt… nervous, almost guilty. But what did she have to feel guilty about?

Andrea’s gaze flickered between Lena – who had since averted her gaze and was staring into her wineglass like she’d never seen a glass of wine before in her life – and Kara.

She tilted her head thoughtfully before looking into Kara’s eyes again. Her confusion melted away, and a loving smile replaced her frown. Andrea stretched out a hand towards Kara.

“Come here,” she mouthed.

Kara smiled, and shook her nervousness off. She took the drink, and walked back over to her girlfriend.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” Kara smiled.

Andrea carefully took the drink from Kara’s hand and set it down next to her on the coffee table. She then pulled Kara down next to her.

Kara landed on the cushions with an inelegant ‘oompf,’ but was immediately soothed by Andrea’s soft arms circling around her waist. One hand came up to Kara’s upper arm, and rubbed it softly.

“You okay?” Andrea asked.

“Yeah,” Kara whispered. “I’m just glad you’re here.”

Andrea smiled and pressed a kiss on the crown of Kara’s head as the blonde buried her nose in the crook of Andrea’s neck.

“I’m glad too,” she whispered, and Kara felt her heart grow four more sizes.

She swung her legs over Andrea’s lap, and let Andrea’s hand trail over them, drawing patterns with her fingers where she could.

“You know,” Andrea said casually, “I don’t know what you were so afraid of. Your sister seems fine to me.”

Kara smiled. “Well, it’s day one. She’s not going to use up all of her badass, scary energy in one night. Also,” she added pointedly, “she’s distracted.”

They both turned to look at Alex who was laughing loudly at something Sam was saying, her hand intertwined with Kelly’s, whose chin rested on Alex’ shoulder so she could listen to Sam too.

“So what you’re saying is,” Andrea said after a beat, “I’m not out of the woods yet? The worse is yet to come?”

“Don’t worry,” Kara pressed her lips to Andrea’s neck, “if she’s getting scary, I’ll save you.”

Andrea laughed, and Kara felt the vibrations reverberate through her own body. She loved it. She loved it.

“My hero,” Andrea said lovingly, kissing Kara’s head again.

Kara smiled, and sighed happily. She had been worried about nothing. Andrea was happy, Alex was happy… She was comfortable in Andrea’s embrace, and she would stay there for as long as possible.

But she couldn’t quite figure out why she couldn’t bring herself to look at Lena for the rest of the night.

* * *

The days passed by quickly and uneventfully in National City. Fall began experiencing winter-y temperatures, and a cold wind blew through the metropolitan area, pushing people to seek refuge in overcrowded coffee shops and warm department stores. One dreary day it had started drizzling, and it hadn’t stopped since. November was wet, cold, and altogether very unappealing.

Supergirl spent most of her time stopping robberies, catching pickpockets, as well as wrestling the occasional irritated alien bringing down the value of National City’s real estate.

Her and Alex went home to Midvale for Thanksgiving. Given that they’d spent most of their previous thanksgivings in National City, they’d deemed it fair to go visit Eliza for once, instead of making her come all the way to the big city all by herself.

And Eliza had missed them a lot. Even though they were in constant contact with her, the distance was hard on all of them. Calls and weekly emails just weren’t the same as the tight, warm hugs, and the conversations over steaming mugs of tea from Eliza’s own garden. Alex and Kara had decided to keep it a Danvers women weekend, meaning that no girlfriends or other friends would come along, and they would just enjoy being together like they had when they were younger. Just with less fighting and bathroom hogging. Just them and Eliza, back in their childhood home.

Kelly and Andrea had understood.

Kelly was spending the holiday with James and her mom, and had just kissed her girlfriend goodbye and made her promise to be nice to Kara, which the latter very much appreciated. Andrea, on the other hand, being from Argentina and all, had never really seen much use in the holiday to begin with, so she wasn’t really feeling very left out.

“I mean, it’s basically celebrating the slaughter of the Native Americans, Kara,” she’d said with a frown. “I fail to see how that is cause for celebration. Not to mention that less than twenty-four hours after people say what they’re grateful for, they bash each other’s heads in, trying to get the cheapest refrigerators or what have you. It’s ridiculous.”

Kara had agreed, obviously, but she still silently cheered for the delicious chocolate pecan pie she knew was waiting for her back home. Paired with delicious turkey, and an amazing set of jams Eliza prepared with fruit from her own garden, this meal was something she looked forward to all year. She agreed it was a pretty barbarian, macabre holiday, but the idea of food could at least persuade her to celebrate the notion of being grateful for all the good things in her life.

One of which just happened to be Eliza’s homemade chocolate pecan pie.

After Thanksgiving, things pretty much went back to normal. Well, National City normal.

December saw the employees of CatCo running around the building on very little sleep and with an endless supply of Noonan’s coffee cups almost magically appearing on their overflowing desks. The December issue was coming up, which meant dozens of winter wonderland photo-shoots, interviews with all the celebrities of National City on how they decide to spend the holidays, as well as articles on all the events and happenings in the city. It was so busy that Kara found it to be a miracle if she got to talk to Andrea for more than three minutes on the phone once a day.

At least Andrea was busy too.

Her company was preparing for the Christmas season by unveiling a new line of festive outfits and accessories, and opening up pop-up stores wherever it could. One the rare occasions where Kara did see her, Andrea looked exhausted, and could barely keep her eyes open. When Kara expressed her concern however, Andrea would just smile tiredly and kiss her.

“Don’t worry, my darling,” she’d said, “it’s a busy season, but the pay-off is going to be incredible. I’m so excited about all my new ventures,” she’d shaken her head in such a cute lovable way that it had made Kara’s insides melt. “I’m so excited to share them all with you.”

Then Andrea had distracted Kara with kisses, until she’d forgotten what she wanted to say in the first place.

The only thing that didn’t go back to normal though, was CatCo’s main office.

Lena still hadn’t come back to work. She told Kara over quick coffee breaks that she was just too busy getting the numbers through for the end of the year over at L-Corp, but Kara knew that was only half-true. She knew there was a different reason why Lena hadn’t come back to work yet.

It made working at CatCo about ten times harder, because try as she might, Kara just couldn’t make peace with the idea that Lena had left CatCo because of her. Every day, she willed herself not to look through the glass walls of Cat’s – and Lena’s – office. And everyday, she did, about ten times. And everyday she was disappointed, because the office was either vacated, or James was there, quickly taking some notes before running off to a different part of CatCo to deal with whatever issue came up.

Lena had assured her that things would go back to normal, and that she hadn’t abandoned CatCo completely, and that she would eventually come back, but Kara was quickly losing hope. Lena hadn’t so much as set foot in CatCo in over two months. It kind of hurt.

There was one upside to the whole situation, however. She and Lena were finally, _finally_ growing closer again.

While things hadn’t completely gone back to the way they were before, her and Lena were tentatively trying to find their balance again. Lena’s emotional plea not to leave her had affected Kara so much, she couldn’t _not_ want to talk to her friend again. And truth be told, the speech hadn’t just tugged on her heartstrings because Lena had been crying, but because every word Lena had uttered could’ve been pulled from Kara’s own diary. She loved Lena so much; to imagine a world in which they weren’t friends made her sick to her stomach.

So they both tried.

It started with tiny texts. Just a simple ‘good morning,’ or a ‘good luck on your presentation with the board today.’ The occasional update on their lives. Kara shared her frustration about Alex’ hard-headedness from time to time. Lena lent her support through various emoticons and some cat gifs she’d managed to find. For a literal tech-genius, it had taken her an absurdly long time just to figure out what gifs were, and how she was meant to use them, in Kara’s opinion.

They kept their texts light. Short. Easy. They didn’t talk about heavy stuff. Kara only mentioned Supergirl when talking about busy days, and Lena didn’t push her. But Kara missed hearing Lena’s voice, and seeing Lena’s face. After admitting that over text, Lena let their texts evolve into phone calls.

Kara didn’t really feel ready to sleep over at Andrea’s, and Andrea had the unhealthy habit of working on various projects until deep into the night, so Kara usually went home alone after her crime-fighting was done. After taking a shower, and finally getting ready for bed, Kara was so tired it took everything she had not to fall facedown onto her bed and fall asleep. The only reason she didn’t, was because those hours, late at night, but not too early in the morning, was the only time Lena could comfortably talk on the phone without being interrupted by her assistant, or some business leader who needed her undivided attention. Those hours, when the both of them were relaxed, usually in their respective apartments – in Kara’s case, snuggled in her dozens of soft blankets and her thick comforter in her bed – those sweet hours, were just for them.

Lena would usually still be working away on her laptop, but more of what she called her ‘relaxed’ version of working. Finalising some reports, going through her emails… things she found easy enough to do from the comfort of her couch with a glass of wine in her hand, and a good book within reach.

Kara found herself eagerly awaiting the calls with a fast-beating heart, counting the seconds until Lena finally wrapped up whatever she needed to wrap up, to dial Kara’s number. They would talk about everything and nothing, until they ran out of things to say to each other, at which point, Lena would gently ask Kara if she would rather just go to sleep. Kara’s answer was always no. Even when it was mumbled through an extended yawn, she would say no. Lena would chuckle, every single night without fault, and she’d ask for Kara’s suggestions on how to keep their conversation going. At that point in their phone call, they’d usually already been on the phone for at least an hour, time flying by when they talked, but Kara would be so exhausted she was barely able to keep her eyes open. Still, the thought of falling asleep instead of talking to Lena for another minute was unimaginable. She would always rather talk to Lena. So Lena would take up her book, or she’d finish the answer to an email, all the while voicing her actions out loud.

Kara had admitted once, that Lena’s voice was so calm and soothing that it easily lulled her to sleep, and Lena had greedily soaked up that information with a grin. At some point – Kara couldn’t recall just when – Lena had stopped bothering to ask Kara how to fill the time in their phone conversations. She’d just read pieces of her writing – whether they were boring corporate emails, or scientific dissertations from when she was younger – to a smiling Kara. Lena would provide background information and comments on her own work, and it was just adorable. She would say: “Did I really write that? No wonder I wanted to switch fields back then, this research was tedious.”

She often read some other reviews from the scientific magazines she was subscribed to – like the cute little nerd she was, as Kara giggled. It earned her an admonishment through the phone. Sometimes she would comment with just a scoffing: “Really Doctor Gerald? That’s really the theory you want to run with? Okay, whatever. It’s your career.” Other times she would absentmindedly half mumble half sing some old song while she gathered her stuff, with Kara still on the line.

Kara was smart enough to turn off the lights, and let Lena’s voice guide her into a well needed-sleep. When Lena sensed that Kara was just on the brink of sleep, she’d whisper a soft “sleep tight,” and was content with the murmured “good night,” from Kara, after which she’d turn off the phone with a chuckle.

Kara had woken up way too many times since, with her phone lost in her blankets. She couldn’t say she’d slept badly since they installed their almost nightly phone calls, though.

They had real conversations in the flesh too, as of late. They talked over short lunches, if Kara didn’t spend them with Andrea, and intermittent coffee breaks. But Kara still sneakily thought their phone conversations to be her favourite. She loved how honest they were, and how they were reserved just for the two of them. In those hours, nothing would bother them. No attacks that needed Supergirl’s attention – so far – and no annoying L-Corp people fighting over every free second of Lena’s attention.

It did, however, create a monster of a schedule for Kara. She spent her days – and some parts of her nights – dividing her time between working on articles at CatCo, showering Andrea with love and attention as much as she could, saving the city as Supergirl, and caring for her friends and family.

She was running ragged.

It had been ages since she’d found the time just to read a book, or paint, or just generally do something for herself. Kara honestly felt like she was just racing off from one place to another, from CatCo to the D.E.O. right back home. She almost felt like she hadn’t just simply stood still in ages.

Which is why, when Alex called to cancel on a sister’s night, Kara suddenly felt at a loss for what to do.

“ _I’m sorry, Kar, I really am_ ,” Alex sighed over the phone.

“That’s okay,” Kara said, “busy day at the D.E.O.? Anything I can help with?”

But before she could even contemplate locating her supersuit and getting into full-blown Supergirl-mode, Alex answered:

“ _No, no, nothing like that_.”

There was a pause. Kara didn’t spur Alex on, and waited patiently on her explanation. Alex sighed, and Kara could hear it both through the static of her phone, and by focussing on the sound of Alex’s voice, a couple dozen blocks from her apartment.

“ _Kelly and I had a fight_ ,” Alex finally said. “ _She stormed out, so now I have to go fix it_.”

Alex sounded… tired. Resigned. Like just the thought of arguing with Kelly again was exhausting her.

“Oh no,” Kara whispered. “Are you okay? Is there anything I can do?”

“ _No, no, it’s fine_ ,” Alex reassured her tiredly. “ _You’re sweet for offering, but, this isn’t – there’s not much you can do._ ”

“Okay,” Kara whispered, and slowly sank down in her sofa. “Wanna tell me what it’s about?”

Alex sighed. “ _It’s nothing – I mean, it -it’s pointless, really_.”

Kara waited.

Alex paused. “ _We got into an argument over work_.”

“Okay…?”

“ _Kelly feels like I’m hiding things from her, which, you know –_ duh _. But, it didn’t really feel like that was all she was upset about. I mean she knows that I have something to do with James and Guardian, and Supergirl, and that I fight with Aliens and anti-alien lunatics all the time, so she’s put some things together, and it doesn’t feel like she needs me to tell her more, ya know?”_

“Sure,” Kara said, but she wasn’t actually sure. She didn’t really get it.

“ _And then she started talking about Sam – ”_

“Sam?” Kara interrupted. “What’d she have to say about Sam?” she frowned.

_“I don’t know, all sorts of things. Started mentioning how close we are.”_

“But you’re friends,” Kara stated confused. “And you haven’t seen each other in ages. It’s only normal you guys would want to reconnect.”

“ _Right?!”_ Alex exclaimed. _“That’s what I said!”_

“Wait, wait, how did you say it though?” Kara asked. “Because you do tend to sort of get just a tiny, lil bit defensive about – ”

_“I said it in a normal tone, Kara!”_

“Okay,” Kara conceded, “I was just asking.”

Alex huffed. It was a frustrated huff. One that was usually reserved for when Kara was watching some Hallmark Christmas movie, and the couple got into an obvious fight that would be resolved just before the end of the movie where they would get their happy ending. She hated those moments. She would loudly complain about them all through the actual scene until both Kara and Eliza were ready to kick her out of the living room.

“So,” Kara drew out, “did she elaborate on the Sam thing?”

“ _No_ ,” Alex said, and the rustling of her getting some coat made its way through Kara’s speaker, “ _she just told me to figure it out. Then she walked out. Totally immature_ ,” she mumbled under her breath.

Kara hummed affectionately. “So what are you gonna do?”

“ _Well I’m going after her_ ,” Alex said irritated, and Kara instinctively drew back. “ _I kind of have to, don’t I?”_

“I don’t know,” Kara whispered. “It doesn’t actually sound like that’s what you want to do.”

“ _Of course it’s not what I want to do, Kara,”_ Alex exclaimed. _“I spent all day filing paper work, dealing with cadets who think it’s hilarious that a woman’s in charge of them, dealing with criticism from commander Hailey of all people, and then I come home to see my girlfriend giving me the cold shoulder, and ranting to me about things that make absolutely no sense instead of telling me what’s wrong so that I have to chase her instead of just getting the burger I’ve looked forward to all damn day? Yeah, no,” she bitched, “I’d of liked this day to end a little differently, thank you very much.”_

Alex was practically panting by the end of her monologue. Yelling out her frustrations into the phone did apparently provide some sort of cathartic relief that temporarily lifted her spirits.

Kara wisely held her tongue, as she could barely feel Alex’ exhaustion following the admission.

“ _I’m sorry_ ,” Alex finally whispered, “ _I shouldn’t have – I’m sorry. It’s not your fault I’m having relationship troubles.”_

“Alex,” Kara gently reminded her, “you’re my sister. I always want to be the one to listen to your rants and frustrations. Of course I prefer listening to your enthusiastic talks about your new D.E.O. training facilities,” she teased, and Alex laughed. “I’ll always take some bad with the good. Otherwise things would just be dull, and we’d have no real conversations.”

Alex sighed. “ _That’s true_ ,” she conceded.

“Well, of course it is,” Kara said seriously. “Everything I say is true. I’m a pretty wise person.”

“ _Alright, okay_ ,” Alex laughed, “ _don’t let it get to your head, you weird little alien_.”

“What I mean is,” Kara said lovingly, “you’re my sister. I want to be the person you contact if you’re feeling down. Would you rather I didn’t tell you if something was bothering me?”

“ _Of course not,_ ” Alex sighed. “ _I see your point. Thank you, Kara_ ,” she added softly.

“That’s okay,” Kara smiled.

Kara could practically feel Alex’ smile through the phone.

“ _Well_ ,” Alex said eventually, “ _I guess I should go after her, right_?”

It almost felt like she was asking Kara if that was the right course of action. Or even more, that she wanted Kara to give her an out. To provide her with an excuse, a reason not to go over to Kelly’s apartment and fight some more.

“Alex,” Kara asked, “do you think anything productive will come of you going over to Kelly’s tonight?”

Alex sighed. “ _Not really,”_ she admitted, “ _she’ll probably be vague again, and I’ll say something stupid because I won’t understand, and then we’ll fight some more.”_

“Okay,” Kara said. “So maybe you shouldn’t go over there tonight. At least not until you’ve gotten a good night’s sleep and some more perspective.”

Alex didn’t say anything, and for a second, Kara thought Alex might actually be considering doing what she’d proposed, but then Alex sighed, and Kara knew she’d lost the argument.

_“Yeah, no, thanks Kar, but I’m going to try and see if I can at least make her tell me what’s wrong. Just so I know what we’re fighting about, you know?”_

Alex joked, but Kara could tell she was just exhausted and incapable of fighting another fight. But she also knew her sister, and she knew there was nothing she could say to change her mind when she was set to do something.

“Alright,” Kara said. “Text me to tell me how it went.”

“ _Will do,”_ Alex promised. “ _Sorry about cancelling again. I’ll make it up to you. Try and do something fun for yourself tonight, okay?_ ”

“Okay,” Kara whispered, “bye.”

She put down her phone after Alex had said goodnight. She leaned back against the couch cushions, and turned her head to look out the window.

“So that sucked,” she said to no one in particular.

There she was, having her first free night in weeks, and she had no idea how to spend it. She felt awful for Alex, of course. Fights were never easy and she knew how much Alex cared for Kelly, but she still felt that little tingle of her own egotistical side whispering: but what about sister’s night? What about the plans they’d made?

Kara looked around her darkening apartment, her eyes darting over the pile of books she’d collected that she hadn’t even opened yet. Her painter’s easel stood starkly near her window, almost begging to be used again. But Kara felt no desire to pick up her old paint and get to work.

She wanted to text Andrea; they’d had dinner last night over at Andrea’s apartment, and things had been so lovely, and the music had been so soft, and Andrea’s personal chef had prepared the most amazing combination of flavours she’d ever tasted. Kara desperately wanted a repeat, and she was tempted to call Andrea and beg her to come down to Kara’s apartment for some well-needed loving hugs. But Andrea had told her the night before she’d be up working all night on some new project that required her attention.

Kara sighed and got out her phone.

Don’t work too hard tonight.  
Miss you  
xxx

She read the text over a couple of times before shooting it off. She usually wasn’t too careful about what she wrote, but something about Andrea made her terribly self-conscious sometimes. Andrea was so classy, so amazing, she was already so out of her league. Kara didn’t want to add to that by texting and behaving like a weird immature teenager.

Not even five seconds after she’d sent the text, her phone buzzed with a response.

I won’t. Promise.  
What would I do without you taking such good care of me?  
Have fun at sister’s night. Tell Alex hi from me.  
Love you heaps.  
\- Andrea

Kara smiled. Andrea had such a way of making everything feel better.

Kara thought about texting her that Alex had bailed on her, but decided against it mid-sentence. Andrea was so busy lately, hopping from one project to the next, trying to lead her company to the top of National City. She was already so stressed out; Kara didn’t want to add to that by making her feel guilty for leaving her alone.

She sent some x’s back, and put her phone down.

She looked at the clock, and saw it was still too early to call Lena. She would still be working, and wouldn’t want to be disturbed. So that left Kara with very little options. She’d already cooked, and eaten a gigantic portion of pasta, so she couldn’t go out with the excuse to get dinner now either.

So what now? As if on cue, Kara heard the distinct sirens coming from several police cars downtown. She wasn’t sure what it was, and if it even required her attention, but seeing as she had nothing better to do, she supersped into her costume, and flew out the window.

The situation, it turned out, was nothing more than a hoax. A very stupid one at that too. Some idiot had left a big unmarked package in City Hall. When the mayor and his associates had finally stepped out of the meeting, they’d found the package and thought it was a bomb. The whole building – which carried more people than usually because of some long drawn-out debate about housing – went into a frenzy, and had to be cleared out by the police. When Supergirl arrived at the scene, she took the box high up into the air before scanning it. It turned out to be empty, save for some old papers. It had clearly just been meant for the trash.

All in all, everything had been taken care of in less than forty-five minutes. It took her longer just to reassure everyone that it had probably just been an accident by some overworked rookie intern who forgot to put it near the trashcans, than that someone was actively trying to murder National City’s mayor and his friends.

After a lot of persuasions and reassurances on her part that she would keep an extra observant eye on City Hall and the mayor, Supergirl was finally free to go. She thanked the police officers for their efforts, and bid them goodnight as they smiled tiredly, filling out their final witness statements and reports.

She bent her knees, pushed herself up, and took off, soaring through the fresh night sky.

The buildings flashed by her in one continuous grey blur with yellow streaks. The wind ruffled her hair, and elevated her to new heights. Kara smiled. She would never grow tired of that.

Kara turned and leapt, making summersaults up in the air, and laughing out loud while she did so. She dove, and accelerated, flying over the Pacific Ocean, just because she could. She extended her hand into the water while flying a little faster, and let the droplets soar up into the night sky. She felt like a little kid, gazing through the ocean depths in wonder, trying to see the many coloured fishes mind their own business right underneath her. The feeling of being untouched by gravity, and being able to feel so free was just… amazing. Wonderful. Incredible. She could never, ever get used to it.

Once she finally slowed down, she set her course back to National City. She didn’t want to get spotted hovering over the ocean anyway. Some news crew would catch light of her nightly activities, and she would never get a chance of flying somewhere in peace and quiet because the camera’s would already be there to track down her every move.

The irony of her aversion to obsessive news crews wasn’t lost on her.

Kara flew back through National City, flying as slow as she could to savour the calm feeling of being so far above all the troubles in the world. She passed CatCo, then the D.E.O., going passed Alex’ apartment. And then… she flew right by L-Corp.

The lights were still on in Lena’s office. No surprise there, Kara knew her friend liked to work for as long as possible, especially when all her employees who could possibly disturb her had already gone home. Apparently that made the work ‘more peaceful.’ Lena’s words. Kara didn’t really buy it.

Lena was a workaholic. She was just also really skilled at coming up with excuses as to why she had to work so hard.

When Kara had brought up once that Cat rarely worked the hours Lena did, Lena had just batted her eyelashes and had said: “Well that’s just cause she had such a wonderful assistant like yourself there, darling. Those are hard to find. I couldn’t possibly find two of you.”

Kara had blushed and had been momentarily too distracted by the compliment to follow up on the unhealthiness of Lena’s work life. Only when Kara had gotten home after, it dawned on her.

“ _Nuts_ ,” she’d mumbled to herself.

She shook off the memories and zeroed in on Lena’s balcony. When she focussed her sight a bit more, she could see Lena perfectly. She was sitting on her fancy office chair, slumped over a stack of papers that did nothing to make Kara think that Lena would make it home before midnight. She’d kicked off her uncomfortable heels – Kara let out a silent cheer, yay for cuddly socks, nay to painful toe-squeezing shoes – and was rubbing her forehead in methodical circles with her two fingers that also held her fancy pen. She was definitely going to find some ink splotches on her face when she got home.

Kara wanted to fly down to go see her. She really did. And if she were Kara – well, if she were dressed like Kara, at least – she might just do that. She would fly down to the building, ask to be let up, and greet Lena with some delicious take-out and a perfect way to get her mind off her work for half an hour.

But Kara wasn’t dressed as herself right now. She was sporting her signature red cape and her house insignia. Her red boot clad feet hovered in the air, and the wind made her skirt twirl around her hips.

She was Supergirl.

Kara bit her lip.

While she and Lena were definitely in a better place now, having discussed her being Supergirl and all, that still didn’t mean it was the best subject for either of them to bring up. While Kara sometimes made slight references to her alter ego, mostly when she had to explain why she was so tired and she had to say something like: “Oh, all of National City’s criminal underbelly just decided to rob banks, and they thought it was cute to shoot at me with electric beams.”

The point was, Kara wasn’t entirely sure how Lena would react seeing Supergirl in all her Supergirl-iness right in her personal space.

The woman in question sighed, and brought a hand up to the back of her neck, rubbing the tight knots Kara knew were there. Lena complained about them all the time, yet never found the time to go to a masseuse to try and work them out.

Lena closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose.

Kara’s heart quenched. Lena looked so tired.

Before her mind could catch up to the decision Kara had just made, she flew down and landed softly onto the balcony.

Lena’s heartbeat shot up at the sound, and she turned around so quickly, Kara was convinced the woman had to have some vertigo right there and then. When Lena’s eyes finally adapted to the dark however, she recognised Kara, and her eyes widened.

“K-Supergirl?” she asked disbelievingly.

Kara waved awkwardly through the glass.

“Hi,” she said sheepishly.

Lena barked out a disbelieving laugh, and stood up; slipping into the heels she had discarded before. She walked up to the balcony doors and opened them with a smile.

“Well, well,” she smirked, crossing her arms. “Dear old Supergirl, right here on my humble property. To what do I owe the honour?”

Kara laughed. “I’d hardly call these premises humble, Miss Luthor,” she joked.

Only when she’d uttered the last words a chill ran through her body. She remembered the last time she had to call Lena that.

Lena seemed to catch on too, and the smile froze on her face.

“Ah well,” she said, regaining her composure, “I suppose they are rather imposing. Not my idea I’m afraid,” she said, walking back into her office while Kara followed. “Lex put up the building years ago, right after LuthorCorp’s first office, constructed by my father, became too small to carry all of its nefarious business dealings.”

“Right.”

“But I’m sure that’s of little interest to you. What can I help you with, Supergirl?” Lena asked, all professionalism, as she sat back down at her desk.

_Wait, what?_

Did Lena think Supergirl only ever showed up to ask for help or to spy on her? Was that it?

“I – nothing,” Kara responded confused. “Nothing of the sort – I don’t need anything.”

Lena arched her eyebrow in question.

“I just – the lights were on and, well ehm – I was flying, so, I eh, I came to down to see eh you,” Kara stumbled her way through an explanation, and failed to explain exactly why she was there to visit Lena.

To be fair, she herself wasn’t entirely sure why she’d come down to visit Lena, since she knew chances were they were going to talk again later that night on the phone. Just… something about Lena looking so tired and frustrated, cooped up in that stupid office of hers… it made Kara want to rush in to help her, like she used to before, when she was just ‘Kara’ to Lena.

“I don’t know,” Kara said honestly, when Lena still looked confused. “I was just flying by, and I – well.”

Kara clenched her hands together, and looked down to the floor with blushing cheeks.

“I guess I just wanted to see you.”

When she dared to look up through her eyelashes, she saw that Lena’s entire stance had softened. Her corner of her mouth was tilted upwards with a hint of a smile, and her eyes showed nothing but surprise, and an overwhelming amount of love.

“I see,” she smiled, and Kara could finally relax. “That’s sweet of you.”

She stood back up and gestured to the couch.

“Take a seat, please.”

Kara obliged, and went down to sit on the white couch where she swore her and Lena had had about a million conversations now. Tough and soft. Interesting ones, and some pointless ones. Kara remembered all of them in vivid detail.

Still, she felt kind of silly, sitting there in her tiny red skirt, taking up space on the Kara and Lena couch. Not the Supergirl and Lena couch.

Kara started fidgeting with her fingers, and felt more uncomfortable by the second. This was so stupid. She shouldn’t have come. This was weird. She should’ve just stuck to the phone calls and leave it at that. But no, she just had to be greedy.

 _Idiot_.

“Can I get you anything?”

Kara shook her head. Lena slowly walked around her desk and went to her little bar. She poured herself a glass of wine and went to sit down next to Kara, all the way over at the other end of the couch.

Kara looked at her, and shot her a shy smile, which Lena returned.

Lena looked pretty. She was wearing a stylish black-and-white dress, and her hair was up in some fancy updo which made her look incredibly fancy.

Kara felt self-conscious sitting there, becoming increasingly aware of how the special bulletproof fabric of her shirt clung to her chest, while her cape stuck out embarrassingly from underneath her. It probably stuck out like a sore thumb on the fancy white, leather couch.

She bit her lip.

This was such a mistake.

“So,” Lena asked, motioning at Kara’s outfit, obviously just as clueless as to what to say as Kara, “you, eh, have a busy night?”

Kara blinked, and looked down at the house of El insignia.

“Eh, no,” she said, “not really. Just some intern causing some mayhem over at City Council. No big deal.”

Lena nodded. “That’s good,” she said after a beat. “Having an easy night once in a while. Can’t imagine it’s nice having to fight ginormous aliens and extremist assholes with superpowered weapons all the time.”

Kara let out a short laugh. “Yeah. This definitely beats last year. It’s nice not to be the country’s number one undesirable for a change, you know?”

Lena laughed too, and Kara felt herself loosen up at the sound.

“It was just some idiot leaving behind one stupid cardboard box, and the mayor just lost his mind, thinking there was a witch-hunt sent for him.”

Kara started motioning with her hands.

“Imagine being the blandest, most unnoticeable, useless mayor this city has had in _decades_ , and be so freaking full of yourself that you think there’s an entire secret society out to get you! I mean,” she had to laugh herself, “it took me longer to calm him down than to check the package!”

Lena laughed, and clutched her stomach.

“And the most annoying part of it all was, I wasn’t even on duty tonight!”

“Really?” Lena asked, her beautiful red lips still smiling. “I thought you always just kinda,” she waved her hand around, “flying about. Spotting criminals. Fighting them. All that.”

Kara hummed thoughtfully. “It’s both, really. I usually tell the D.E.O. when I won’t be active, like when I have something to do, an event to guard, and then they’ll usually take over. However, when there’s an emergency,” Kara sat up a little straighter, “I’m there.”

“So how come you were called in tonight?” Lena asked with a frown. “It certainly doesn’t sound like that was a real emergency you had to be present for.”

“Oh, no,” Kara said, “that was just because Alex cancelled on sister’s night. I didn’t know what to do with myself, so I just flew out the second I heard some commotion.”

“Why did Alex cancel?”

Kara shrugged. “Some fight with Kelly. She’s over there now trying to fix it.”

“Oh no,” Lena said, “am I allowed to ask?”

“I mean you are, but I don’t know the full story,” Kara explained. “I just know it was something about Alex’ job, and then it escalated and Kelly brought Sam into it. Strange, right?”

Kara expected Lena to let out a loud: “What?” or “That’s ridiculous! Samantha Arias? Our Samantha? Why bring her into this?” or at least a: “Sam? Why Sam?” but Lena just stayed quiet, contemplating Kara’s words.

“Lena?”

“I mean it’s not all that strange,” Lena said eventually, after having taken a slow, thoughtful sip of her wine. “I can kind of imagine what Kelly must feel.”

“How so?” Kara frowned.

“You really don’t see it?” Lena asked confused.

Kara shook her head. _See what?_

“Honey,” she started, turning to face Kara a bit more, “Sam and Alex are close. Have been close, ever since they met. Right?”

“Yeah, but they’re like best friends,” Kara said with no small amount of confusion. “Of course they’re close.”

“Yes, I agree,” Lena continued, “but the fact of the matter is, every time Sam’s around, Alex only has eyes for her. There could be an army of aliens out to get us, but if Sam were involved,” Lena made a noise, “I guarantee Alex is going to focus on one person, and one person only.”

“What are you saying?” Kara shook her head. “That my sister is cheating on her girlfriend?”

She could hear her voice rise, and she knew she should try and keep calm but she was just honestly –

“My sister is a good woman. A good girlfriend, heck, a good fiancée when it comes down to it! She would never, ever – ”

“I wasn’t insinuating that she was!” Lena interrupted. “Hey,” she said, her voice lowering significantly. She scooted closer on the couch, until she was sitting right next to Kara, and took Kara’s hand in hers.

“I wasn’t saying she was. I’m sorry, hey,” she rubbed Kara’s hand lovingly, and tried to catch her gaze. “You know I love Alex, I could never think she was anything but loyal in a relationship. Ever. I didn’t mean to make you upset.”

Kara suddenly felt silly for her stupid little spat.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled. “I’m just a little bit defensive of Alex at times, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” Lena giggled, “Alex is so lucky to have you as her sister. I’m sure she’s glad someone’s out there to have her back.”

Kara looked up at Lena and smiled.

“Thanks Lena,” she mumbled, her cheeks tinted red from the compliment.

Lena was still sitting very close. So close, in fact, that her dress-clad leg, and part of her bare knee were touching Kara’s leg. She hadn’t let go of Kara’s hand, but Kara didn’t actually mind that. Lena’s hand was soft, except for the ring on one of her fingers. But she was still rubbing circles on Kara’s hand with her thumb, and that feeling alone could lull Kara into such a deep sense of comfort and safety, it anyone came up to attack L-Corp right then, Kara wasn’t a hundred per cent sure she’d be able to stop them.

“Are you okay?” Lena asked, still a little concerned about her previous - embarrassing – outburst.

Kara caught Lena’s eye.

“Yeah, yes, totally,” she reassured Lena. “I’m A-okay,” she promised.

“Okay,” Lena said, but didn’t let go of Kara.

“So,” Lena said, very obviously – but also very successfully – trying to distract Kara, “if the whole thing with the mayor didn’t last that long, why are you here so late? What else did you do?”

“Oh,” Kara perked up. “I went flying!”

“You went flying?” Lena asked.

“Yes! Across the pacific!”

“You went flying… for fun?” Lena clarified.

“Yes!” Kara smiled. “It was amazing! I saw some fish, I almost touched some clouds. It was great!”

Lena couldn’t help but smile. “I didn’t know you often liked to go out flying just for fun. I always just figured you used it for transportation, or to fight crime.”

“Oh no,” Kara said, “flying is the most wonderful feeling there is! I wish I could do it all the time! There’s nothing like it.”

“Well,” Lena mused, “I’ll have to take your word for it.”

“Or I could take you sometime?”

“What?”

_What?_

“I mean,” Kara backtracked, “if that’s something you’d like, of course. Obviously, if you don’t that’s fine. I was only offering – suggesting, really. It’s nothing – ”

“Kara,” Lena cut her off by placing her hand on Kara’s upper arm.

“Yes?” Kara squeaked.

Lena smiled. “I would love that.”

Kara looked into Lena’s beautiful, green eyes, and saw nothing but truth. Lena wasn’t just saying that to make Kara happy, she actually meant it!

Lena’s hand was so warm on Kara’s arm, she swore she could feel it right onto her skin, which coincidentally also broke out into goosebumps. Lena’s fingers were spread out on the fabric of her blue supersuit, and every single finger felt like it was shooting sparks right at Kara.

For a brief, flickering moment, Kara’s eyes darted to Lena’s lips, and then shot right back to Lena’s eyes. A warm feeling that only came with her tell-tale blush spread across Kara’s cheeks.

Because for that one short moment, Kara wanted Lena to lean in and kiss her.

_Wait what?_

Kara instantly scooted back across the couch, which made Lena’s hand let go of her, and drop to her thigh in the process.

Kara did not just think that. She had a girlfriend! She had – Andrea, for Rao’s sake! The most wonderful person to have ever – her girlfriend! Why had she ever thought of Lena that way?

Guilt flooded Kara’s entire being until she felt like she was so full of it, it could run out her pores. Why had she thought that? Oh dear Rao, Lena would be disgusted if she knew. That was terrible. Awful. She couldn’t even begin to comprehend –

“Kara?” Lena asked concerned. “Are you okay?”

Act normal, be normal, Lena doesn’t know, she’ll never know, your brain was probably just rebooting itself or something. It was just a thought. An innocent, little thought. She was probably just missing Andrea. Yeah, that had to be it.

Kara painted on her best smile, even though she knew she had to be pale as a ghost right about then.

“I’m fine,” she said with as much conviction as she could muster. “Just, eh,” she waved her hand at her face, “got a little overheated.”

Lena frowned in confusion. “I thought Kryptonians couldn’t run hot or cold on earth.”

Her eyes widened.

“You aren’t getting sick again, are you?”

It was like Rao was tempting her, because Lena instantly scooted closer and brought one palm to Kara’s forehead.

“Your sister is going to kill me if you faint in front of me again,” Lena mumbled, bringing her other hand up to Kara’s jaw, and turning her head first left, then right, to check for… Kara didn’t really know. Blotchiness?

“You don’t feel like clammy. I don’t think you have a fever,” Lena said absentmindedly, “but your cheeks _are_ pretty red.”

Kara could die.

Lena frowned and dropped her hand. “Maybe we should get you to the D.E.O. just in case.”

“Lena I swear I’m fine, I – ”

“I think I have a first aid kit lying around somewhere, stay put.”

“Lena, I’m fine!” Kara exclaimed, stopping Lena in her path. “I promise this isn’t like before, okay?”

Lena paused, and her eyes scanned Kara from top to toe. “You’re sure?” she asked.

“Positive,” Kara said, hovering a couple of inches above the couch to demonstrate she still had all her powers.

“Oh,” Lena sat back down, “I’m sorry, Kara. I just had to make sure.”

She looked at Kara with so much love and affection that it almost floored her.

“The moment you fainted at CatCo, right across from me,” Lena paused. “That was one of the scariest moments of my life, Kara. I thought someone had done something horrible to you. I thought someone had somehow managed to get Kryptonite inside of CatCo. I just… never want to see anything like that again.”

“Lena, I promise I’m fine,” Kara reassured her, unconsciously scooting closer to Lena.

The latter took Kara’s hand in hers again, but now Kara felt it was more to reassure herself that Kara was indeed safe instead of doing it to console Kara.

“I understand you were afraid, but I’m fine,” she said with a tiny smile. “I’m all okay now, you hear me?”

Lena looked at her, and smiled sadly. “You are.”

For a second they didn’t say anything. Kara just looked at Lena, and Lena looked at Kara, and nothing really had to be said. It was like a spell. A wonderful enchantment that left them comfortable in their togetherness.

And for the second time that night, Kara wondered what it’d be like to kiss Lena.

“ _Supergirl_?” she heard. “ _Supergirl, come in_.

It was Alex.

Kara shot up from the couch.

“Lena, I have to go. Alex needs me over at the D.E.O.”

“Okay,” Lena said confused, standing up. “Be safe.”

“I will,” Kara assured her.

Then, before she could think about it too much, she gave Lena a short hug. So short, in fact, that Lena barely had the time to return it before Kara was already gone with a strong _woosh_.

Kara could vaguely catch a: “Goodnight, Supergirl,” but made herself focus on getting to Alex. There was no point in thinking about it anymore.

But why on earth had she thought about kissing Lena? Twice!

She shook her head. She was tired. That was it. CatCo had been so busy, it was only natural she got confused and started thinking about things she shouldn’t think of.  
  


* * *

“I’m here!” Kara landed with a soft thud on the D.E.O. floor. “What can I do to help?”

“Meet James Hue.”

Alex didn’t even bother greeting her. She just put on the picture of a skinny, shady looking guy with black hair that fell over his sunken equally dark eyes in long tresses.

Kara crossed her arms and frowned.

“He’s a meta-human. He’s been arrested a couple of times on some minor charges. Petty theft. ‘Accidental’ arson, or so he says.”

Alex pulled up a couple more pictures of a flaming man, and Kara’s eyes widened.

“Well that’s gotta be uncomfortable,” she said.

Alex didn’t laugh. She looked tired and cranky, and frankly, in no state to want to laugh at Kara’s subpar jokes right now. She was clad in a D.E.O. T-shirt and jeans, and she had seemingly been pulled from her bed to assist the D.E.O. again, which had not amused.

“He’s been in and out of the D.E.O. for a while now, but lately he’s kept to himself. Thinks he’s a changed man or whatever.”

Her eyeroll indicated his statement didn’t instil much confidence in her.

“Okay,” Kara said slowly, “so he’s done something stupid again? You need me to bring him in?”

Alex shook her head.

“Surprisingly enough, no. He sent us a distress call about one minute ago. Has to be pretty desperate to want to talk to us again. He hasn’t kept his revulsion of us quiet,” she said with raised eyebrows.

“Look,” she said facing Kara, “I’m pretty sure it’s nothing. He probably just got into some trouble with some other meta-human bookies. He’s been known to get into all sorts of trouble. But our code dictates that we at least take a look. And if multiple meta-humans are involved…”

“You want me to get on the case,” Kara finished the sentence.

“You got it,” Alex nodded, and threw her clipboard on a nearby desk, startling the officer who was dozing off at that very same table. “His address is 45 Leann street. Just, see if there’s anyone needing a cool-down, okay? And call for back-up if you need it.”

“You got it boss,” Kara joked.

It earned her a small smile from Alex, but the bags under her eyes, as well as her defeated posture didn’t make it feel like her joke had really landed.

“Hey Alex?” Kara asked nervously, and Alex looked up. “Are you, ehm, okay?”

Alex looked away. “I’m fine,” she snipped. “It’d feel better if I knew the jackass was okay. He might be a criminal, but he’s also not the worst guy that’s ever crossed this floor. I just want to know why he contacted us, so…”

Kara got the cue. If Alex wasn’t ready to talk, she wouldn’t talk. It really was that simple. No person on earth, or any other planet for that matter, could get Alex to open up when she wasn’t ready. Alex could only talk if it was on her terms, if she had a say in what happened.

“Okay,” she murmured, and took off.

Alex would talk to her later.  
  


* * *

  
Kara landed in the worst part of National City. Which was saying a lot, since National City was one of the cleanest Metropolis Kara had ever set foot in. On earth, that was, because other planets like Krypton did tend to keep their cities and societies as squeaky clean as they possibly could.

Although, in retrospect, that wasn’t exactly an indicator of how well a planet was doing.

James Hue lived in what was basically an upscale dump. Buildings covered in graffiti, with broken, dusty windows, and overflowing trashcans right outside the doors. Which was surprising, given how much trash was just littering the street. Most of the buildings seemed uninhabited, but one quick scan with her X-ray vision proved otherwise. Kara’s stomach turned as she saw teenagers huddled together, some unconscious, lying on mattresses and couches indoors. Some televisions were playing old-time-y cartoons, while a radio was broadcasting the top hundred songs of the decade in a different building.

A protruding scent of urine and marihuana hung around the streets, and made Kara’s nose crinkle in disgust. The streets were abandoned, which wasn’t surprising, given the late hour, but made the area seem all the more gauntly.

Kara felt dirty just walking there. She did not want to be there.

She quickly walked towards number 45, the house James Hue supposedly resided in.

It didn’t look much different from the other houses she’d passed. Dusty windows, some covered in political posters that were starting to peel and a roof that seemed to be held together with duck tape and some serious self-confidence. Except for one tiny little detail…

The doors to all the other houses she’d passed were locked tightly, because crime was very prevalent in that part of town. No one in their right mind would even think about leaving their door open. Some had even boarded up their doors with extra wooden pallets, an old-school anti-burglar alarm, so to speak.

But the door of house 45 on Leann Street was left ajar.

On high alert, Kara pushed the door open, and slowly crept inside. She stepped inside and a cloud of dust rose up from the carpet. The house was pitch dark, even with the two small lamps turned on in the hallway, courageously holding on to whatever electricity managed to get to them.

The downstairs room – a kitchen that also seemed to serve as a living room – was empty. However, a lukewarm bowl of pasta and a half-empty glass of water were sitting on a coffee table in front of a TV, untouched. Someone was clearly about to eat here, but for some reason didn’t.

Kara scanned the ceiling, but saw no indications that there was anybody in the house. Still, she had to check for clues.

Kara walked upstairs, almost sinking through a loose floorboard while she did so. The wood was rotten, infested with wood mites and some surprisingly lanky mushrooms. Kara shook it off, and opted to just float upstairs instead.

When she got there, Kara was shocked.

The upstairs were in shambles. All the furniture had been turned over, there were black scorch marks on the bullet-riddled walls, and vases and plates lay broken on the ground. A fight had taken place here, and it hadn’t lasted long. She could still smell the smoke and iron from the bullets.

Kara carefully walked around, to see if there were any signs, anything mister James Hue could’ve left behind that could point to who his attacker was, but however they were, they left no evidence behind. She looked out the window, focussing her vision. The attacker must’ve been in and out of the place in under five minutes. But Kara spotted no suspicious trucks, no helicopters or airplanes… nothing.

However abducted James Hue was long gone.

Kara stood alone in an empty, ransacked room, and could do nothing but call Alex via intercom.

“Alex? No, there’s no one here. He’s gone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! 
> 
> Happy New Year, happy holidays and happy whatever you choose (not) to celebrate! This is my gift to you, and I hope you all liked it! 
> 
> This update goes out to Nav for the support! So a big thank you!
> 
> Anyway, thank you for all the kind messages, I'm so grateful for every kudo, every comment… Just knowing that you guys enjoy this story motivates me to write even more.
> 
> I hope 2020 is kind to all of you, and I hope all your biggest wishes come true. 
> 
> Lots of love!!!


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Kara woke up when she the first bright beams of sunlight hit her eyelids. She scrunched up her nose. She refused to actually open her eyes, almost begging her body to just go back to sleep.

It was to no use.

She gradually became more aware of everything in the room. The cool air on her face. The warm duvet around her middle. And something soft and delicate, trailing random figures on her arms. Slowly, very slowly, her brain started to wake up as well.

How could there be cool air in the room when she hadn’t opened her window last night? Why was the sunlight already waking her up when she had really thick curtains in her bedroom to keep out the light? And whatever amazing, soft massage was going on on her arms, she was fairly certain she didn’t have Streaky anymore, who would wake her up when she was younger by walking on the bed, his tail wagging against her arms.

Kara slowly cracked open an eye and was hit with a stunning sight.

Andrea Rojas, basking in sunlight, was propped up on one elbow, a halo of light shimmering around her brown hair, making it look almost golden in the morning light. She was taking in all of Kara, eyes trailing all over, while softly drawing patters on Kara’s arms with her fingers.

“Good morning,” she whispered with a smile.

Kara ducked her head shyly under the covers. “Morning,” she whispered back.

Andrea laughed lightly. The movement made her brown hair fall across her face, but she shrugged it back over her shoulder. She tucked some of Kara’s blonde tresses behind her ear, with a loving smile, and Kara thought her insides would surely melt.

“So,” Andrea said faux-seriously, “give it to me straight. First night sleeping over. How bad was it.”

Kara laughed, and dropped her head on one of the fluffy pillows of Andrea’s bed.

“Mmm,” she hummed, “your bed is amazing.”

Andrea arched an eyebrow. “Just my bed?

Kara laughed. “Oh yeah,” she teased. “I could nap in here all day. All these pillows and blankets,” she punctuated her statement by pulling some stray pillows to her chest. “Oh yeah, I could stay here forever.”

Andrea narrowed her eyes.

“Is that so? Well then maybe, you should just date my bed. Seriously, go right ahead, really.”

Kara laughed at Andrea’s indignant tone.

“Andrea,” she said, cupping Andrea’s cheek. “I loved it. I loved sleeping next to you.”

Andrea smiled, almost giddily.

“Yeah?”

“Yes.”

Andrea smiled before leaning down and kissing Kara softly on her lips.

It was an amazing kiss. A Sunday morning kiss. The sort of lazy kind of kissing you can allow yourself only on warm Sunday mornings, when the world doesn’t expect you to go out and work, or when your sister doesn’t need you to save earth’s population again. The kind you have right before your body can remind you to have breakfast, in those sweet minutes before the rest of the world can remind you of everything else that’s waiting for you.

Andrea’s lips were soft, and warm, still curved into a smile, and the skin on her cheeks was slightly dented with lines from her pillow, which felt heavenly under Kara’s fingers. Her breath washed over her lips, and smelled a little like sleep, but Kara didn’t mind. It made Andrea feel all the more real to her. So real, and so close.

Andrea broke the kiss first, resting her forehead against Kara’s. Her eyes were shut, but her smile was wide and bright, and Kara could just not believe how happy she felt.

Andrea looked happy. Careless. Somehow, she looked ten years younger in the morning, a bit more like a teenager who just had their first kiss than an actual CEO of a major company after her first sleepover with her new girlfriend.

After a while, Andrea broke the contact, and lay back down on the pillows, opening her arms with a clear message.

Kara smiled, and cuddled close into the embrace. She closed her eyes, as she rested her head on Andrea’s chest, careful not to make the other woman uncomfortable. Kara felt Andrea’s hands rest close together on her back, and she felt so incredibly lucky, just for being allowed to be with her. Andrea’s left hand went to the top of Kara’s head, and slowly moved down, twirling through golden curls on her way down, before starting over again. Andrea lightly scratched the tiny baby hairs in her neck, and paid a lot of attention not to tug on any of the knots or tangles in Kara’s hair.

Kara felt so relaxed.

Andrea’s room was the epitome of rest and relaxation. Light blue walls that she said reminded her of Argentina. Light furniture, in grey and white tints, and a beige fuzzy carpet sticking out from under the large queen sized bed. Kara hadn’t been kidding about the bed either. It was so soft, so incredibly comfortable. She didn’t want to know how much money Andrea had spent on the mattress alone!

Andrea’s hand softly bunched some curls in her hand before letting go and twirling some blonde hair between her fingers. Kara felt so utterly relaxed and so at peace, she could feel her eyes close shut again, the massage almost being enough to lull her to sleep.

“Thank you for staying over last night,” Andrea said, breaking the silence.

Kara hummed.

“It was my pleasure,” she mumbled happily. “I’m sorry for taking so long to get us here.”

Andrea kissed Kara’s hair, the only spot she was able to reach from her position.

“You’re here now, that’s all that matters,” Andrea said. “Although I have to admit, I’ve never really dated anyone who seemed to want to take it slow with sleepovers. Sex,” she said matter-of-factly, “definitely. Lots of people want to take it slow when they’re talking about sex. I mean, not with me,” she joked, “but it’s definitely a recurring phenomenon. But sleepovers?”

Kara opened her eyes, and stared out the window.

Andrea’s bedroom had an amazing view of National City, with skyscrapers and high-rises seemingly sprouting outside her window. The grey curtains were pushed back, so the view was unobstructed, and the natural sunlight could find its way inside. Kara tried to find the right words, focussing on one of the glass skyscrapers reflecting sunbeams outside.

“I’m sorry,” Kara mumbled self-consciously. “It’s just… the last person I shared a bed with, my boyfriend, he, ehm, he left. And it really, really hurt. It also felt awful waking up without him. It took me a long time to even want to sleep in my own bed again. It’s no reflection on how I feel about you,” she said, trying not to sound too desperate.

“Oh my darling,” Andrea said, shifting a bit, so Kara sat up a bit more, and Andrea could look her in the eyes, and hold her face in her hands. “Don’t worry about it. It doesn’t bother me. I’m just happy you were willing to spend your night in my bed, okay?”

She waggled her eyebrows at the statement, and Kara couldn’t help but burst out in embarrassed laughter, just like Andrea had wanted, undoubtedly.

Instead of answering, Kara opted to place a lingering kiss on the sweet spot on Andrea’s jaw, right under her earlobe, almost tentatively brushing down to Andrea’s neck.

Kara lifted her head back up, and saw that Andrea’s attention was solely on her, the smile almost gone from her face, and her pupils blown.

For a split second, Kara worried she’d overstepped, done something wrong.

She loved Andrea, but Andrea could be iffy about certain things. She didn’t like people touching her stuff, getting things out of order, that sort of thing. Kara was still learning all her little ways. Maybe Andrea didn’t want her to kiss her there?

Oh Rao, Kara felt her cheeks heat up at the thought that maybe she’d done something wrong. It’s not like she had much experience with women to fall back on.

Right before Kara could apologise, a wicked grin appeared on Andrea’s face. In one smooth move, Andrea pushed herself up, and turned Kara over, who, with a short _whelp_ , landed on her back, with Andrea hovering over her.

“Hi,” Kara said, a little out of breath for someone with actual superpowers.

“Hi,” Andrea smirked.

Kara blushed all the way to the tops of her ears.

“Mmm,” Andrea hummed, “have I told you lately how fucking gorgeous you look in my bed?”

_Oh dear Rao._

Speaking of Him, Kara was convinced she was as red as her sun god right about now. But every time Andrea said things like that… Kara just found it hard to breathe.

“Eh, no,” Kara stammered, “I don’t believe you have.”

Andrea smirked. “Well then.”

She leaned in closer and rested her lips on Kara’s cheek, just centimetres away from her ear, and whispered. “You look fucking gorgeous in my bed.”

Andrea lifted herself back up, and looked down, her eyes sweeping from Kara’s lips back up to her eyes in question.

Kara could barely register what was going on, her befuddled brain taking its sweet time to wake up and smell the roses – or, in this case, Andrea. Nevertheless, the way Andrea looked at her made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside, so she nodded.

Andrea wasted no time, and lowered herself down onto Kara’s body. Kara didn’t mind that at all. Andrea’s weight on her body felt good. Safe. Warm.

Andrea kissed her again, but this time there was more urgency to her kiss. She pressed hard into Kara’s lips, taking the lead almost instantly. Her tongue traced the seam of Kara’s lips, and it felt so soft and hot at the same time that Kara thought her mind might be going into overdrive.

And then Andrea started pressing tiny kisses to Kara’s jawline. She kissed quickly and sloppily, all the way from her chin to where her jaw met her ear. It felt so good. So warm, so… ticklish. There really was no other way to describe it.

But then Andrea let her lips trail to Kara’s neck, and Kara’s body almost jumped up, only being held down by Andrea’s weight, and the knowledge deep down somewhere in Kara’s brain that prevented her from showing her powers to people.

The warm, wet sensation of Andrea’s tongue on her neck did cause Kara to falter, and she moaned.

Actually moaned.

In Andrea’s presence.

While Kara couldn’t decide whether she felt embarrassed or not, Andrea absolutely did not seem to share that feeling.

Her lips left Kara’s neck, and she kissed the corner of Kara’s mouth, before taking advantage of Kara’s still open mouth by slipping just the tip of her tongue inside of Kara’s mouth. She flicked just the tiniest bit, and just barely grazed Kara’s teeth.

It felt wonderful. Amazing. World-changing, even!

But then Andrea’s hand, which up until that point had sweetly stayed on Kara’s arm, was starting to crawl its way up. Kara could barely focus on Andrea’s lips, or on kissing her back, as she became increasingly more aware of the hand’s trajectory.

The hand paused on Kara’s hipbone, and for a split second, Kara felt relieved, because she thought it might’ve reached its destination. Kara kissed back softly and tenderly, surrendering to Andrea, who seemed dead set on ravaging her.

And then the hand moved up. It crawled over Kara’s toned stomach, under her cotton pyjama T-shirt, and Kara felt her heart speed up for all the wrong reasons.

When she felt the tops of Andrea’s fingers hit the underside of her breast, Kara sat up suddenly.

Andrea stopped immediately.

“Hey,” she asked, flushed from all the kissing. “You okay? Did I bite you too hard?”

In all truth, Kara hadn’t even felt Andrea’s attempts to bite her; she had been too focussed on that wandering hand.

“No, no, you didn’t bite me,” Kara said quickly. “I’m fine.”

Andrea looked at her for a while, and then her brow furrowed.

“Did I do something else wrong then? Did you not like my kissing?” she added self-consciously.

“No, it’s not that,” Kara said, trying to stamp down the guilty feelings of making Andrea believe she was bad at kissing, out of all things. Like Andrea could be bad at that, Kara inwardly laughed. The woman was a goddess.

“I ehm,” she took Andrea’s hand in hers, almost to reassure herself it wouldn’t try to crawl back towards her breasts again.

“I just,” Kara couldn’t quite bring herself to look at Andrea again. “I just felt like we were going a little…”

“A little…?” Andrea tried to catch Kara’s eye. When she looked up, Andrea looked worried.

“… a little fast?”

“Oh,” Andrea said surprised. She pulled her hands back and Kara almost felt guilty all over again.

“I just,” Kara hurried to say, “I just felt like it was a little much so soon. I want to have sex with you – ”

She blushed.

“I really, really do. But… I want to feel ready, prepared, when that actually happens. I want to make sure it’s perfect. Is that okay?”

She bit her lip anxiously. She knew it was important to share her wants and don’ts and desires with her partner, but that didn’t make it any easier. Especially since she was refusing a woman who probably had hot men and women lining up for her, jumping at the chance to have sex with her. Maybe Andrea would tire quickly of Kara’s prudish behaviour.

And Kara wasn’t lying. She did want to have sex with Andrea. She’d had sex before. Good sex, bad sex. But somehow, this felt bigger, grander, even more so than when she lost her virginity. This was Andrea Rojas. This was a beautiful woman who wanted her, who appreciated her. And yet something held Kara back.

Andrea nodded seriously after a beat of silence, and when she saw Kara’s worried expression, she smiled.

“Okay, thanks for telling me,” she said calmly.

Kara nodded tersely. Was Andrea upset?

But Andrea didn’t kick her out of bed, nor did she say she was disappointed. She didn’t ask when Kara would be ready either. She just went to lie back down and opened her arms again. Kara could almost cry in relief, as she rushed to lie back in Andrea’s arms.

Andrea took the comforter, and pulled it over the both of them, banning the chilly morning air from the both of them.

“Don’t worry about it,” Andrea said, in between sweet kisses to Kara’s cheek, almost reading her mind. “We can just make it a lazy Sunday morning. Would you like that?”

Kara smiled, relieved. “Yes. You have no idea.”

Andrea laughed, and pulled Kara close, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend. They both sighed happily, and Kara had to giggle at the synchrony. She couldn’t imagine Andrea was very comfortably, what with Kara half-cushioned on top of her, but Andrea made no move to change positions.

Andrea’s fingers found Kara’s arms again, and she resumed her own imaginative drawings, dragging her fingertips over Kara’s sensitive skin. Kara closed her eyes, and smiled.

This was the life.

“I think I like spending my Sunday mornings with you,” Andrea said after a beat, a rare tinge of vulnerability in her voice.

Kara nosed the crook of Andrea’s neck, and placed a small kiss there too.

“Me too,” she whispered lovingly.

Andrea squeezed Kara’s hand in response.

* * *

Alex looked tense.

Her shoulders seemed tight, and unlikely to lower or relax any time soon. Her arms were crossed over her chest, and she was staring down her agents suspiciously, barking orders at any poor soul unfortunate enough not to have anything on their hands.

Even agent Dox was standing some steps away from Alex, tapping away on some futuristic looking iPad.

“Hey Brainy,” Lena said as she walked past him.

Brainy looked up and his face lit up.

“Lena Luthor,” he called out enthusiastically, “you are here!”

Lena couldn’t help but smile at his adorable antics.

“That I am. I’m here to help. Alex called.”

“Yes she did,” Alex called out irritated. “And she didn’t call you to chat with agent Dox.”

Lena rolled her eyes, but strolled over nonetheless.

“Alex,” she said conversationally, “good to see you in such a splendid mood. Sleep well?”

“Don’t sass me Luthor,” Alex grumbled. “Take a look at this.”

She shoved a stack of documents in Lena’s hands, and Lena almost buckled under the weight.

“Look through those and tell me what you see.”

Lena frowned, and went to work, going through stacks and stacks of… real estate documents?

“Real estate?” Lena asked. “You called me here out of my very busy office for real estate? I could have just recommended some people if you’re looking to invest.”

“Will you just look?”

Lena sighed, and turned back to the files at hand.

“I don’t know what I’m looking at,” Lena said eventually, after having read through most of these files. “These are just different documents of different rich people buying lots.

“Exactly,” Alex said grimly, “but look at the dates.”

Lena skimmed through the documents and saw that all of that ground, and all those empty construction lots had been bought up in basically the same three months. There were some outliers, of course, but most of them had been acquired within the same period of time.

“You think it’s connected,” Lena said simply.

Alex nodded.

“Your mother tells us there’s a new anti-alien group brewing in National City, and not a month later those buy-ups start stacking up? And that’s supposed to be a coincidence? No,” she shook her head, “I don’t buy it.”

“Okay,” Lena said slowly, “so what do you need me for? This all seems pretty clear-cut.”

“Well it isn’t,” Alex said. “All the lots were bought by different people. They seem to have no connection, except for…”

“They’re all rich and all move in the same circles,” Lena finished for her.

“Exactly,” Alex agreed. “Just look at those names. Celebrities, stock-brokers, real estate moguls… People from all walks of life, who have nothing in common except for the amount of zeros in their bank accounts.”

“Wait,” Lena said, thumbing through the documents, “these locations aren’t all that far away from each other. They’re all close to the water, but far away from any commercial areas or any place with living quarters on it, really.”

“They’re constructional zones,” Alex said. “I had Brainy take a look at some satellite pictures. There’s some big empty hangars on those terrains. The people that bought the ground, didn’t break down any of them.”

“They kept the hangars,” Lena said slowly, and Alex nodded. “I don’t get it,” Lena said finally, pretty frustrated that she couldn’t make the connection. “A lot of rich people buy a bunch of ground in pretty much the same place, and we don’t know why. Have you tried taking a look to see what they’re doing?”

“Of course I have,” Alex snapped. “But unfortunately, they’re very protective of their ground, and unless I get a warrant – which is impossible, because we have absolutely no proof that they’re up to something nefarious – we’re not taking a single step on their ground.”

Lena sighed. “So what do you want me to do?”

“I don’t know,” Alex said, looking so tired, that Lena felt a little sorry for her. “I can’t connect any of the dots until they do something, and I just worry that by then, it’ll already be too late.”

Lena sighed, and put a hand on Alex’ shoulder.

“We’ll figure it out, Alex. We always do. We just need to find a new approach.”

Alex smiled a disheartened smile. “Yeah, maybe.”

She patted Lena’s hand. “Thanks, Lena. I hope I didn’t pull you away from anything important. I just wanted to keep you up to speed.”

“I appreciate it,” Lena smiled. “Now c’mon, I heard you’ve got a Christmas party to plan?”

Alex groaned.

“Don’t even mention it, it’s going to kill me.”

Lena laughed. “You’re so dramatic, it’s a Christmas party! What’s the worst that could happen?”

“Well first of all,” Alex pointed out, “it’s going to be a Christmas lunch party, cause Andrea has a Christmas gala or something going on, and she needs Kara to come.”

Lena clenched her jaw.

“Fair,” she said tersely, trying to hide just how she felt about that. “But my point still stands. What’s so bad about it?”

“My mom’s gonna show up,” Alex said sombrely. “And she’s going to ask me all about Kelly, and it’s going to be awkward as hell, and I won’t even be allowed to drink, because then she’ll think I’m an alcoholic and I’ll get a scolding.”

Lena let out a disbelieving laugh.

“That’s the worst thing you could come up with? That’s really your idea of a nightmarish Christmas? An overbearing mother and a lack of alcohol?”

Alex frowned. “How is that not awful?”

“You clearly haven’t spent time at a Christmas party at the Luthor manor.”

“Guess my invitation must’ve gotten lost in the mail,” Alex commented dryly.

“You don’t know awful until you’ve been to one of those parties,” Lena ignored her. “It’s basically a room full of evil, rich people, schmoozing about how much money they made on the backs of poor people, while sipping champagne and looking at you in the most disgusting way possible.”

Alex face scrunched up in disgust. “That’s awful.”

“And let’s not forget about my mother!” Lena said. “When she wasn’t off scheming with lord-knows-who she was constantly criticising – ”

Lena suddenly stopped talking.

“Lena?” Alex asked concerned. “Are you okay?”

“Yes,” Lena said, turning to Alex. “I just thought of something.”

“What?” Alex asked.

“The people who bought the land,” Lena said impatiently, “the ones so rich and so awful we’ll never be able to get close to them.”

“Yeah?” Alex asked. “What’s with them?”

“Well we already said it!” Lena exclaimed. “They move in the same circles! We need to find people who move in those same circles! If there’s really someone out there telling them to buy that ground and whatnot, then they’ll contact our person on the inside, and we’ll know more.”

A light bulb almost physically manifested above Alex’ head.

“Yes,” Alex said slowly. “Yes, that just might work!”

Her eyes lit up. “Who did you have in mind?”

Lena’s smile dimmed a little at that. “You’re not going to like my suggestion,” she said honestly.

Alex looked confused, before horror dawned in her eyes.

“Oh no. No, no. Please don’t tell me –”

“How many awful rich people do you know we can sort of trust?” Lena argued.

“Oh no,” Alex groaned.

“Yes,” Lena said. “I think we need to ask Lillian for help.”

* * *

“Kara, we don’t need a billion appetizers,” Alex groaned.

“Yes we do! So keep chopping those onions.”

Alex groaned again, louder this time, but Kara ignored her. She was busy strategically setting up the room. She wanted them to have appetizers in the living room, like they always did. Just comfortably huddled together, all relaxed and cool. And then she wanted them to move over to the actual table – which had been decorated perfectly, thank you very much – so they could have a fancy lunch, like adults.

“I hate cutting onions,” Alex said throwing her knife in the sink. “My eyes keep tearing up.”

“Oh, the great D.E.O. director Alexandra Danvers, beaten by an onion?” Lena joked.

Alex turned around, her face stormy and dangerous, but slightly undermined by her teary eyes.

“I am not getting beat by a stupid onion,” she warned. “And don’t! Call me Alexandra.”

She turned back around, grabbed the knife, and furiously started cutting onions again.

Kara and Lena laughed, as they moved some small plates into the living room.

“You weren’t kidding when you said the name thing was a delicate subject.”

“No I was not,” Kara joked. “Thanks for setting up by the way. You really didn’t have to do that.”

Lena waved her concerns away. “Please, it’s no bother. I’ve been invited to so many of your holiday parties over the years, I can’t believe I haven’t helped you out more.”

Kara smiled, and continued decking the small coffee tables she’d placed around the living room.

Christmas was an institution in the Danvers’ household. When Kara first moved in with them, she hated pretty much everything on earth, from the food to the houses, to the blue sky above them. But when her first Christmas had rolled around, Kara had quickly found one thing she did absolutely love about Earth.

The weird tradition of putting a tree in your house – insane, but wonderful – and then getting to decorate it? And you could sit in your pyjama’s all day, and open presents, and eat delicious food with warm beverages? Kara couldn’t think of anything better, ever.

So every year since that first Christmas, Kara really went all out on the holiday. She loved organising a house to fit all her friends and family, getting the perfect gifts, and making the most delicious meals she could think of. She even loved the holiday buzz, the crowded streets, and the near-depleted stores.

Kara loved all of it.

So when Andrea had surprisingly said that of course she’d very much like to spend Christmas with Kara instead of in Argentina with her father, Kara had momentarily been stumped.

She’d already invited all her friends. That was no worry, they all knew Andrea, and sort of liked her. She thought. But Eliza was also coming. Eliza was driving from Midvale to National City, just to spend the holiday with them.

Which meant that Andrea and Eliza would meet.

For once, Kara understood Alex’ anxious behaviour every time Eliza was to meet someone she liked. For the very first time, Kara thought about cancelling Christmas altogether, just so she wouldn’t have to deal with her adoptive mother meeting her very first girlfriend.

In the end, Alex’ insistent ‘just call hers’ had convinced her to just get it over with. So, she’d dialled Eliza’s number, and had, in one really quick breath, told her she had a girlfriend who would also be at Christmas, and would that be okay, and also would Eliza freak out, and did she mind not getting a single son-in-law, and was she freaked out, and oh no she wasn’t, but was she disappointed, no not that either, and would Eliza still come, and yes she would and also she was enthusiastic, and oh she would bring her chocolate pecan pie, and she was excited to meet Kara’s girlfriend, and oh she was so happy and so proud, and she couldn’t wait to see her daughters again, and oh she loved them both so much, and all by all it all went way better than Kara had expected. 

Alex was even a little miffed that Eliza was so calm and supportive, while all of Alex’ previous boyfriends had always gotten the stinkeye.

Kara had a slight idea as to why that was, but she wasn’t about to broach that subject.

When the tables were finally set, Kara walked into her room and took a large Ikea bag out from under her bead.

When Alex saw the bag, her eyes lit up.

“Presents?” she exclaimed.

“Presents!” Kara confirmed giddily.

She carefully took out one wrapped package after the other and placed them in neat constructions under the beautifully decorated tree.

“Alex,” Kara called out from under the tree, “give me yours, and I’ll put them next to mine.”

“Uh-uh, no way.”

Kara whipped her head around to look at her sister. “What? Why not?”

Alex folded her arms over her chest. “Because you’re just going to look through ‘em again to see what I bought you.”

Kara’s cheeks turned red. “No I wouldn’t.”

Alex arched an eyebrow.

“Fine,” Kara grumbled.

Lena laughed. “I can not keep up with all these funny alien qualities of yours darling. It never occurred to me how you could use your gifts and powers for such trivial things.”

Kara’s face lit up. “Wait till you see me roast a turkey!”

“Yeah,” Alex commented, “delicious home roasted turkey with a side of radiation for free.”

She was hit by the pillow so fast, she never saw it coming.

* * *

People started coming in around twelve. Nia and Brainy, followed by J’onn, came by with a bag full of gifts they immediately sorted under the tree.

Sam came rushing in with Ruby in tow, and was delighted to find that for once, she wasn’t the last one to arrive.

Kara was in a nervous rush to finish up the last touches of her appetizers – little toasts with salmon, dill and onion, toasts with olive tapenade, as well as tiny crab cakes, red beet-based hummus with pitta bread, and an assortment of vegetables and homemade sauces. She rushed to fill glasses with champagne, or fancy sparkling lemonade in Ruby’s case, flying from one task to the next.

“Alex, can you come stir the soup please?”

Alex strolled over, more relaxed than Kara would want her to be.

“Why are we even making soup when we already have a turkey?” Alex asked, sniffing the pot on the fire suspiciously.

“Because I read somewhere that it’s _fancy_ to serve tiny cups of soup at – hey! Don’t taste it and then put the spoon back, that’s not hygienic!”

Alex rolled her eyes, but dutifully grabbed a different wooden spatula to stir the soup.

“Why are we even pretending to be fancy. We’re not fancy.”

“Well we’re having fancy guests,” Kara bit back. “So I’d appreciate it if you could just work with me for once.”

“Okay, okay. Don’t go all kryptonian on me.”

Kara rolled her eyes and took off her apron.

“I’m gonna go change. Can I trust you not to set everything on fire while I’m in my room?”

Alex threw her a look.

Kara held up her hands defensively. “Just checking.”

She zapped into her room and came back clad in a deep red dress that showed off more cleavage than she’d ever shown before. It came up to her knees, but had a daring split in the skirt, revealing a sliver of her upper thigh. She’d finished the look with some tiny black heels and some diamond earrings Andrea had given her some time ago.

Wolf whistles and cheers rose up from the living room when Kara walked back into the living room, and Kara blushed a deep red – almost as red as her dress.

“Wow, Kara,” Sam teased. “Someone special coming over tonight?”

The others laughed. Lena shook her head with a smile and took a sip of her champagne. Kara stuck out her tongue at Sam but blushed all the same.

“It’s for Andrea’s gala,” she explained, but it did nothing to appease the laughter of the group. “I just thought it’d be fancy.”

She self-consciously stroked the smooth fabric down her thighs.

“You like it?” she asked, her shaky voice betraying her nervousness.

“Oh I like it,” Nia said, before smirking, “but I know someone who’ll absolutely _love_ it.”

The others laughed again, and Kara swatted in their direction.

“You guys are the worst; I can’t believe I keep inviting you.”

“You love us,” Nia called out, and Kara shook her head.

A knock on the door at least gave Kara an excuse to walk away from her mean friends and open the door.

“Joel,” Kara asked surprised.

Joel was Lena’s driver, but he was currently standing at the door, red and sweaty. The cause of his haggard appearance wasn’t hard to find. He was carrying a gigantic bag filled to the brink with perfectly wrapped presents.

“Miss Luthor asked me to bring these up,” he said.

“Oh Joel!” Lena ran over and accepted the bag from her driver, almost dropping it. Kara quickly took it from her, and Lena smiled gratefully.

“You’re a lifesaver, Joel,” Lena said, and quickly shoved a wad of crisp green bills in his hand.

The man’s face brightened instantly. “It was no problem, Miss Luthor. Merry Christmas!”

“And happy Chanukah to you, Joel!”

The man waved one final time, and then waddled back downstairs.

“Lena,” Kara admonished. “We had a strict one gift per person policy.”

Lena waved her concerns away, leading the way to the tree so she and Kara could rearrange the way the presents were presented.

“I followed the rule!” she said innocently. “But sometimes one gift is composed of multiple, tinier gifts.”

Kara groaned. “You’re impossible!”

Lena winked.

“So where did you get that dress?” Lena asked conversationally, as she placed a round gift on one of Nia’s tacky snowman wrapping paper-covered ones.

“Oh,” Kara blushed, looking down. “I used to go to all these different boutiques to pick up stuff for Miss Grant? I went by there this weekend and… well, I splurged.”

Lena narrowed her eyes thoughtfully. “Which one? Which boutique?”

Kara looked up guiltily. “The small British one on Lakor Street?”

Lena’s eyes grew two sizes.

“Kara!” she hissed. “Those dresses are insanely expensive! I know they don’t go for less than a thousand bucks a piece!”

“I know,” Kara whined. “I do. But Andrea invited me, and I couldn’t show up in any of the dresses I have because she’s already seen all of those! She told me to wear something fancy and new, so I had to go out shopping! I don’t want to embarrass her by standing there in something silly.”

Lena sighed.

“Kara,” she said softly. “Next time, just come to me. I’ve got loads of fancy dresses I’ve never even worn. You can borrow one of those anytime. Okay?”

Kara smiled sadly. “Okay,” she mumbled.

Lena shook her head. “A thousand-dollar dress for a gala. I thought you only justified spending that much money on food.”

Kara laughed. “Well, you’re not wrong. Guess I spend my money on food, and things that make my girlfriend happy.” She looked down at the dress. “I hope.”

“Kara,” Lena said seriously, “you look gorgeous. Andrea’s not gonna know what hit her. You’ll be the prettiest girl there.”

Kara blushed. “Yeah right.”

Lena tilted up Kara’s chin to make her look her in the eye. “You will,” Lena emphasised. “None of those girls will even compare to you, you hear me? You’ll be the Belle of the ball. Even if you won’t have a beast on your arm.”

Kara cracked a smile. “You remember the Disney reference.”

Lena laughed huskily. “How could I not after you practically forced me to watch it with you.”

Kara laughed.

“Mom texted,” Alex piped up, “she’s getting gas just outside of National City. She’ll be here in twenty.”

Immediately, the queasy feeling Kara had successfully buried by working hard on her appetizers and keeping busy came back.

“Oh GodohGodohGodohGod,” Kara mumbled.

“Hey, Lena said, “why are you so nervous?”

“I don’t know!” Kara exclaimed, straightening her dress. “I –I don’t know. I’m just… scared.”

Lena looked at her questioningly.

“I just want my mom to like Andrea,” Kara explained. “This is the first ever girl I’ve brought home, and I just want things to go well.”

“Kara,” Lena reasoned, “Andrea’s perfectly polite. Why would she not like her?”

Kara bit her lip. “I don’t know.”

She didn’t feel relaxed.

“I don’t know. I just have this feeling. Eliza kind of… gets a feeling about people. She instantly loved Maggie, and James. She even liked Mon-El. She’s liked all of my friends really. But what if she doesn’t end up liking Andy?”

Lena tucked some hair behind Kara’s ear, and looked at her with a soft, loving smile.

“I’m sure she’ll be happy you’re happy,” Lena said. “She’ll see that Andrea treats like a princess, and she’ll love her. Don’t worry, okay?”

Kara swallowed, and looked into Lena’s eyes. They showed nothing but support and unconditional love, so Kara couldn’t help but nod, and smile back.

“Okay,” she whispered. “Okay.”

“Now,” Lena said turning back to the presents at hand, “let’s organise these presents shall we? Careful,” she warned, “some of those are very hard to replace.”

Kara groaned and Lena laughed.

“Not even sorry, darling.”

Kara packed a present, when a voice made her pause.

“But we’re all counting on you to come.”

Kara turned her head to see Alex still in the kitchen, on the phone with someone, an ugly frown adorning her face.

“But we saved you a seat and everything. Kara made lunch… But we put in vegetarian options for you. Yes, I know, but we’re all – what do you mean who’s there?”

Kara’s stomach sank.

Lena looked at her questioningly, momentarily halting the present organising, but Kara couldn’t bring herself to say anything.

“Well, you know,” Alex said uncomfortably. “There’s Nia and Brainy – you love Nia and Brainy! Ok, yes fine! There’s also Lena, my sister, J’onn,” she hesitated, and Kara knew right that second they’d have one fewer plate on the table.

“Sam’s here too.”

Her sister didn’t say anything. It was clear Kelly was speaking now. And as much as Kara wanted to know what was being said, she respected her sister’s privacy enough not to listen in on the conversation.

She turned her back to Alex once she saw her entire expression fall. Her sister needed a second to process her hurt or whatever by herself.

“What’s – ”

Kara shook her head and took a present out of the bag, putting it in front of one of her own red-and-gold wrapped presents.

Lena looked at her silently for a while, before grabbing another present and continuing her work.

Kara heard her sister’s phone click.

Then –

“Kelly’s not coming,” Alex informed the group.

“Oh no,” Nia said. “Why not?”

Alex shook her head.

“She had other obligations,” she said simply.

Lena’s words of those nights ago re-entered Kara’s mind, and she looked at Sam, who didn’t say a word. In fact, she looked kind of stuck between deep-sated guilt and plain relief. Relief that she wouldn’t have to play pretend with Kelly? Relief that she had Alex to herself?

Kara didn’t know. She didn’t understand.

She looked to Lena for answers, but Lena just smiled sadly and moved on with the gifts.

Was Kelly not coming because of Sam? Kara knew Kelly and Alex had hit a bit of a rough patch, but they weren’t really fighting over Sam, were they?

Alex plopped down on one of the couches opposite of Sam, her expression glazed over a bit.

“She’ll come by some other time,” Alex commented, but Kara didn’t know if she informing the group, or just trying to reassure herself.

Either way, Alex didn’t look happy.

And Eliza hadn’t even come by yet.

“Hey Alex!” Kara yelled, momentarily stumped by her own impulsiveness.

Alex looked up with a frown.

Right. She called her, so now she had to have a reason.

She looked at Lena from the corner of her eye, and an idea popped into her head.

“Lena and I were thinking about making some cocktails. For fun. You in?”

Lena frowned at her, opening her mouth to protest, but Kara swatted in her direction, and Lena just went with it.

“Sure. Sam, you want to join too?”

“Eh,” Sam said, “Ruby can’t really help and I – ”

“I’m fine mom,” Ruby dismissed her. “Nia’s telling me all about fighting crime as Dreamer.”

She nodded approvingly. “Kick-ass name by the way.”

Nia laughed, and Sam blinked at the conversation going on between the two, before resigning herself to her fate and walking over to the bar.

“Well,” she sat down on one of the barstools, “it appears my daughter’s found a new superhero to dote on. Sorry Kara.”

Kara shrugged. “I’ve still got some cool stories ready. She’ll be back before she’ll know it.”

Sam smiled. “So what kind of cocktails are we making?”

“Yes, Kara?” Lena turned to her friend. “What cocktails _are_ we making?”

“Eh…”

Kara started rummaging through her cabinets, and came up with some limes, some lemons, rum that Alex had stashed away in her cabinet for emergenies, wine, and some soda as well as sugar.

Kara regarded her ingredients for a second.

“Sugar, rum, limes and soda? We can make mint-less mojitos?” Kara suggested.

The others looked at the ingredients and shrugged.

“Why not?” Sam said, and took some of the limes.

“Not the worst thing I’ve ever gotten drunk on,” Lena added.

Alex looked at Kara for a second, like she knew exactly her sister had just come up with this stupid idea to distract her. But Alex smiled a half-smile and went to sit down on the barstool.

“Hand me a cutting board?” she asked Kara, hand outstretched.

Kara smiled, and happily obliged.

Ten minutes later, everyone was enjoying their low-budget mojitos. Even though they didn’t actually have mint, and the sugar they had was only mostly cane sugar, cause it was the last bit Kara had found and they had to add some white sugar to go with it, and they put some limes and lemons in for the taste, they all really enjoyed the drinks.

Lena swore high and low that it was the best cocktail she’d ever had, while Alex said it didn’t taste as ‘sissy’ as the usual cocktails in bars. Sam was just glad they changed up their drinks a bit, because in her words:

“I cannot deal with another wine hangover. Last time, I had to go to one of Ruby’s soccer games after a night out drinking with Lena, and I swear to God I’ve never been closer to death than when I stood on a field full of yelling soccer moms right under the scorching sun.”

The others laughed, and so started the tradition of their worst (and best) alcohol poisoning nights.

“I’ve gotta say,” Lena said looking up pensively, “a friend’s eighteenth birthday party. We were on a yacht in Italy, near Sicily – ”

“Snob,” Alex whispered in her glass.

“Well I was going to invite you to join me on my yacht this summer, but if you think it’s over the top – ”

“No, nonononono!” Alex said quickly. “I was just kidding. Please don’t make me spend my summer cooped here in National City?”

“That’s what I thought,” Lena smirked. “Now where was I? Right,” she snapped her fingers. “We were on the boat, having a party, getting absolutely pissed.”

They laughed.

“But then,” Lena continued mischievously, and Kara’s attention was piqued, “one of the girls, Sienna, drunk off her ass, suggested we all go skinny dipping.”

Kara’s stomach dropped.

A couple of ooh’s rose up from the group, and Lena smirked, holding the group’s attention like a pro.

But Kara’s mouth suddenly felt very dry.

“Skinny dipping?” she asked hoarsely. “As in… naked swimming?”

Lena nodded salaciously. “Uhu. And obviously, us being young, stupid and wasted, we thought it was a splendid idea.”

The others laughed, but Kara suddenly couldn’t really feel the humour of the situation anymore. One the one hand, she wanted to listen to Lena’s story, without any interruptions, because Rao did she want to know what happened next.

And on the other hand, Kara felt a wave of nausea come up. Because somehow, after months of nervousness with Andrea, Lena’s words had shot straight through her, and set her entire body aflame. She felt hot, almost sweaty – which was impossible – and she felt that sneaking sense of familiar guilt that had come from that one night in Lena’s office.

This wasn’t a strange feeling.

She was turned on. She was hopelessly, uncomfortably turned on.

Kara could sink through the floor if she could, and she almost cursed the sun for not including the power of dematerialisation to come with the super strength and flight.

“So what did you do?” Alex asked almost breathlessly.

Lena smirked.

“Well the Luthors didn’t raise a quitter,” she said, and Sam cheered.

“No you did not!” she cried.

“Did too!” Lena laughed. “I pulled off my black sundress and my bikini and jumped right in.”

“Oh my God!” Alex cackled.

“Oh my God,” Kara whispered.

“We’re not even three minutes in the water, and who shows up?”

“Who?” Sam asked eagerly.

“The maritime police force,” Lena deadpanned.

“No!”

“Oh yes! Apparently, there had been complaints about our boatparties from neighbouring boats – ”

“You can’t make this shit up,” Alex whispered in her glass.

“ – and as we are now all very aware, skinny dipping is, in fact, illegal.”

“Oh my God!” Sam yelled. “What happened then?”

“Well,” Lena said, gingerly picking up her cocktail, “they were gracious enough to let us get our towels and some underwear.”

“You got arrested?” Kara asked breathlessly.

“God, no. Well, not for long anyway. Never even saw the inside of a jail cell. Lex bailed me out,” Lena explained. “Then he paid those officers good money to forget I was ever there. And to this day, my record remains squeaky clean. Well,” she added as an afterthought, “except for the whole: you’re brother’s a murderer thing, and the ‘you must be in on it too so we’re arresting you’ thing.”

Alex raised her glass. “I said I was sorry. So did Maggie.”

Lena hummed, and took a sip of her glass. “Isn’t bringing that lost day I spent in prison back.”

Alex sighed deeply. Lena was never going to let her off the hook for that. But Kara deemed it fair, since she’d never let them off the hook for that either.

“Oh Kara, you look kind of red. Are you okay?”

Kara was shaken out of her reverie by Sam. She’d noticed her blush. Oh dear Rao, no.

“That is true. You okay, Kara?” Alex asked.

Lena looked at her with concern, and Kara could just die.

“I’m fine,” she said quickly, “just, ehm, thinking about my drunken stories.”

Alex snorted. “What drunken stories? You got drunk once!”

“Really? A drunken Supergirl?” Lena smirked. “Now that I need to hear about.”

“Oh,” Kara blushed, “it was nothing really. I just got to drinking with Mon-El, and I – ”

“Ugh,” Alex groaned. “Can we not talk about him? He sucks. Let’s just forget he was ever part of the team. Look,” she said, “I’ve already forgotten the dude. It’s like… Mon-El? What Mon-El?”

“Mon-El who?”

“Exactly.”

“No, I’m seriously asking. Who’s Mon-El?”

Kara narrowed her eyes at Alex before turning to a confused Sam.

“Mon-El was my boyfriend. He left town right before you moved here.”

“Oh,” Sam said, “right. I remember you saying something about just getting out of a relationship.”

Kara smiled awkwardly. This was not her favourite subject.

“Anyway,” Alex said, “he was a jerk, and now we try not to bring him up anymore.”

“Yes, which you did a great job of, by the way,” Kara said snippily.

“Let’s forget about boyfriends for a second,” Lena said, “they’re not that great anyway, in my experience. Let’s just talk about something else.”

Kara looked at her, and Lena winked. Kara shot her a grateful smile.

“You know,” Alex said, twirling the metal straw in her drink – Kara thought it had added the special ‘cocktail’ touch, “I’ve been thinking.”

“Oh boy,” Lena mumbled in her glass.

Alex just ignored her. “When you and Andrea got together – ”

_Oh boy._

“ – I thought it came out of nowhere.”

“Alex, how much have you had to drink already?”

Alex shot her a dirty glare.

“Not much. I’m trying to have an open conversation here that’s not about boyfriends. Can I? Or would you rather switch subjects again?”

“Switch subjects,” Kara said decisively.

Alex glared at her.

“Fine,” Kara rolled her eyes. “What were you thinking?”

“Well,” Alex started anew, “I thought it came out of nowhere. I was like – _wow_ – you know? Both of us being into girls? What a coincidence.”

“It really isn’t,” Lena pointed out, “statistically speaking.”

“Anyway,” Alex shot her a glare over her cocktail, “I thought it was so weird that I didn’t notice, or like, knew about it. So I started going over some things from back in the day.”

“Such as?” Kara asked.

“Such as your reactions to women!” Alex said in a _duh_ voice. “And lo and behold, I found proof that Andrea wasn’t the first girl you were actively crushing on.”

“Oh,” S am said, turning to Kara with a smirk. “Do tell.”

“Yes, Alex,” Kara said. “Do tell, because I have no idea who you’re talking about.”

Alex crossed her arms on the wooden countertop and leaned forward with a smirk.

“Lucy Lane.”

Kara frowned. “What?”

“It suddenly makes so much sense!” Alex exclaimed. “Oh Lucy smells so nice, oh, Lucy’s so amazing,” Alex said in a horrifying impression of her sister. “Oh I wish I were dating her.”

“Oh my God!” Sam laughed.

“You did not say that!” Lena exclaimed.

“That was totally pulled out of context!” Kara yelled with red cheeks. “And I didn’t say it like that! I was talking about liking James and being jealous of him – I mean her!”

The others laughed.

“And it’s something I told you in confidence,” she gritted at her sister.

But Alex didn’t seem in a hurry to stop. Instead, she smirked lazily.

“And don’t even get me started on Cat Grant.”

“Oh,” Sam whispered, taking a sip from her drink, “what’d she say about Cat Grant?”

“Okay, what are we, teenagers?” Kara exclaimed. Her cheeks felt redder than they should, and she was extremely embarrassed.

“Oh c’mon, Kara,” Sam whined, “please indulge my needs for teenage drama! Ruby won’t tell me anything about what happens at her school, and I fall asleep when I watch Netflix! I need my teenage angst fix!”

Kara sighed and threw her head back. “Fine.” She turned to Alex. “What did I say about Cat Grant?”

Alex grinned. “It’s more what you didn’t say,” she said in an attempt to be mysterious. It didn’t really work though, since she thrived on drama, and couldn’t share her findings quick enough.

“Kara here,” she said to her friends, “refused to quit working for the most ruthless woman in National City. She was always the first to defend Cat. Like, no she’s not a terrible boss – ”

“She isn’t,” Kara deadpanned.

“And she’s so smart and powerful and cool – ”

“She is.”

“And she’s so impressive, Alex, I loooove working for her.”

Kara rolled her eyes at Alex’ exaggerated impression of her.

“I did love working for her,” Kara disclosed. “It wasn’t really a secret.”

“Pfff, whatever,” Alex said, taking a gulp of her drink. “You have a thing for powerful women.” Her eyes lit up. “You have a power-women-kink.”

“Oh my God!” Sam broke out into laughter, while Lena’s mouth fell open.

“Alex! I do not have a – don’t even use that word, what’s wrong with you?”

She took Alex’ drink away from her.

“You so do! Lucy, lawyer. Andrea, CEO. Cat, CEO. Lena, CE – ”

“What?”

“What!?”

“This is the best night of my life,” Sam whispered happily.

“I did not – how could you – Alex, I did not – ” Kara sputtered, which she mourned gave her absolutely zero credibility around her friends, but still.

“Oh c’mon!” Alex said. “When you first came back from your first interview with her, you couldn’t shut up about how pretty Lena was, and how good she smelled, and how different she was from her family, how nice she was.”

“But I didn’t mean that as anything other than deep-rooted respect!” Kara sputtered, unable to even look in Lena’s direction. “Not flirtation!”

“Oh Kara! That’s so cute!” Sam said. “You liked Lena!”

“No! God, Sam! No!”

She made the mistake of looking at Lena, who looked taken aback.

“You didn’t?” she asked.

“Well – ” Kara sighed hopelessly. “I didn’t _not_ think you were attractive. But, like just that! I promise! I would never, ever think of you disrespectfully, and I, I swear I didn’t – ”

She looked helplessly in Alex direction. Alex, who had managed to cleverly steal her drink back – looked up, completely oblivious to Kara’s helplessness.

“Kara, there’s no shame in thinking people are attractive,” she assuaged. “I was just messing with you. Everybody has crushes. Why are you taking it so weird?”

“I-I’m not! It’s just – there’s the deep-rooted stereotype of women-loving-women being predators, and I swear I never – I would never – I don’t want people to think I – ”

“Kara,” Lena quickly intervened taking her hand. “I’m not mad!”

“But I – I really don’t want you to think I was flirting with you! I swear I wasn’t! I just thought you were pretty, and I told Alex, so I totally wasn’t – ”

“Kara!” Lena interrupted her, and Kara fell silent.

Lena looked at her – really looked at her, and she smiled.

“I’m flattered,” she said softly. “And I thought you were really pretty too, when I met you. Still do, really,” she added as an afterthought, “you’re like breathtakingly beautiful.”

Kara blushed.

“And just so you know, if you had actually had a crush on me, I would’ve been so lucky,” Lena added softly.

The words tugged at something inside of Kara, but she couldn’t really pinpoint what.

She just knew that the words kind of _hurt_ somehow. Like a longing, a something that was left unexplored, unopened and had become unavailable.

Lena smiled and winked at her.

“So Alex,” she asked nonchalantly, picking up her glass, “have you ever had crushes on _your_ friends?”

Alex almost spit out her drink, choking on some mojito. When she’d stopped spluttering, her face was as red as Kara’s had been.

Sweet, sweet revenge, Kara thought smugly.

Sam turned to Alex, inexplicably interested in what she had to say.

“I, eh, well I – ehm, m’not sure what – ehm, you’re asking. Like, I eh – I mean, there was Maggie, but we didn’t really like each other first, and I eh – I meant I didn’t _not_ eh – ”

Then the bell rung, and Kara heard Alex whisper an almost inaudible “oh thank God.”

Served her right.

Kara ran to open the door, and almost jumped into Eliza’s embrace.

“Eliza!” she cheered, wrapping her arm around one of her favourite women in the whole world. “You’re here!”

Eliza chuckled, and wrapped her arms around her youngest daughter.

“Hello there, darling,” she smiled. “God, how I’ve missed you.”

“I missed you too,” Kara whispered in Eliza’s embrace.

Eliza’s comforting smell of citrus and lavender that somehow always clung to her, even if she hadn’t spent her day working in her garden, transported Kara back to a simpler, and softer world. Of running around the beach in Midvale; of coming home to a steaming plate of homemade food; or Eliza tucking her in and reading her bedtime stories, even though she’d been old enough to read them herself.

Kara instantly felt all her anxieties melt away and could barely remember why she had been so stressed in the first place.

Eliza broke off the hug, and kissed Kara’s temple lovingly. She looked over her youngest daughter’s shoulder, and a broad smile spread over her face.

“Alexandra!”

“Hi mom,” Alex mumbled, a little embarrassed.

Eliza wouldn’t have it though, and briskly crossed the distance between her and her daughter and pulled her into a hug.

“How are you sweetheart?”

“I’m good, mom. Really.”

Eliza smiled. “I’m so glad.” She took a step away from Alex and looked at her proudly. “You look good, darling.”

“Thanks,” Alex whispered, and Sam giggled.

Eliza looked at the pair and grinned broadly.

“Lena! How are you, sweetheart?”

“I’m good, I’m great,” Lena said, giving Eliza a short hug.

“And you must be Sam! It’s so good to finally meet you.”

“Oh, you too,” Sam said with a smile. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

Eliza went around the room to great J’onn, Nia, Brainy and Ruby, while Alex and Kara exchanged a glance.

“Okay mom,” Alex said, “can I get you anything to drink?”

Before Eliza could answer, there was another knock on the door.

“Oh,” Eliza’s face brightened, “is that Kelly? I’ve been dying to meet her!”

A beat of silence passed, in which Kara looked helplessly at Alex, trying to guess what she could say to their mother. Ultimately, it was up to Alex.

“Eh, no, mom,” Alex mumbled awkwardly. “Kelly couldn’t make it today. She had other business to attend to.”

“Oh,” Eliza looked confused. “Then who – ”

Kara opened the door.

“Andrea,” she breathed happily.

“Hello, my darling,” Andrea said before taking a step closer and softly kissing her girlfriend.

“Hi,” Kara whispered against those amazing lips.

“You look adorable,” Andrea said, after having taken her in completely. “I love your dress.”

Kara flushed pink.

“Thanks. You look amazing too.”

But that wasn’t exactly a weird occurrence. Andrea looked radiant in a skin-tight black dress that showed off all her amazing curves. It made Kara almost instinctively want to wrap her arms around herself, because her body didn’t even come close to Andrea’s wonderous supermodel body.

“You didn’t tell me what your mother liked,” Andrea spoke up, “so,” she opened her bag and showed to eye-wateringly expensive bottles of wine, a box full of the finest chocolate pralines one could find, and one more beautifully wrapped gift.

“I decided to just get her a little bit of everything.”

“Andrea,” Kara whispered, “you didn’t have to bring all that. Really!”

“Are you kidding?” Andrea asked with raised eyebrows. “I’m meeting the mother of my girlfriend. You bet your ass I’m going to pull out all the stops. Gotta make sure she loves me,” she winked.

Kara rolled her eyes, but smiled, and let Andrea pass by her.

“Sam, Nia! Good to see you again!”

Kara closed the door with a smile and listened to Andrea greet everyone as if she’d known them forever.

* * *

Nothing Kara had feared came to pass.

She should’ve known. Andrea was about the most charming businesswoman Kara had ever had the pleasure of meeting. Her girlfriend could charm the pants off about anyone, misogynistic assholes included, so meeting Eliza must’ve been a piece of cake.

And it all went perfectly well.

They talked, they laughed. Everybody enjoyed the lunch, and Kara was complimented on the food and the turkey. Drinks were passed around, stories were shared, and Andrea was as charming as ever.

And yet somehow, Kara found herself looking at the situation from afar. Like she wasn’t really there. She watched Andrea smile, and exchange stories with Eliza, Sam and Alex. She watched Eliza politely smile, and pass dishes around, and talk about work at the lab with Lena and Andrea.

And Kara felt like she was watching a movie. Like it was all a perfect, beautiful hallmark movie, that she was somehow starring in, and also simultaneously watching on the TV.

Andrea put her hand on Kara’s knee under the table. When Kara looked up, Andrea seemed as innocent as well-behaved as ever. But Kara noticed the sly mischievous sparkle in Andrea’s eyes.

She smiled and guiltily pressed a chaste kiss to Andy’s cheek.

Andrea was working so hard on making sure everyone was on board with their relationship. So why was Kara feeling so distant?

Then suddenly, a phone rang.

Andrea mumbled an apology while she fished her phone out of her purse. She glanced at the screen and cursed silently.

“Please excuse me,” Andrea said, kissing Kara’s cheek, “I have to take this.”

“Sure,” Kara said, but Andrea had already walked away, through the door and into the hallway.

For a second there was nothing but the clinking of glasses, and the scraping of forks and knives on almost empty plates.

Eliza was the first to speak up. She scraped her throat and looked at Kara.

“Andrea seems nice,” she smiled.

Kara smiled back. “She is. She really is.”

“If you can read your dreams,” Ruby contemplated out loud to Nia, “can you also read other people’s dreams? Because I had a very concerning dream about some evil, ginormous lollypops looking for world domination last night.”

Ruby’s question relaunched the conversation, and just like before Andrea had left, the life returned to the table, and Kara’s apartment was bustling with noise again.

Eliza however, didn’t partake in the conversation. Her eyes were still focussed on Kara. They looked pensive, concerned.

“How long did you say you two were dating now?” she asked.

“Oh well,” Kara sighed. “I’m not too sure. I met her in September. We started dating not too long after that.”

“Right, right,” Eliza smiled. “You wrote about that in your weekly email.”

Kara smiled.

“So it must be almost three months then.”

“I guess so,” Kara said.

Eliza looked at her daughter for a bit.

“You’re going to a party then after this?” she asked.

“Oh yes,” Kara sat up straight. “There’s this Christmas gala Andrea’s hosting. She absolutely wanted me to be there.”

Kara blushed when she remembered Andrea’s elaborate pleas for her to come. She’d pleaded, and promised her the world, while intermittently placing kisses all over Kara’s face, making it very hard to refuse.

“Is that why you bought the new dress?” Eliza asked cheekily.

Kara blushed. “You like it?”

“You look absolutely beautiful, sweetheart.”

Kara smiled, and basked in that singular glow of having your mother tell you you look pretty in something you bought.

“Thanks Eliza,” Kara whispered, and Eliza shot her a beautiful smile.

The door opened, and Andrea stepped in.

The expression on her face made Kara’s stomach sink.

“Darling,” Andrea started, and Kara already knew what was going to happen.

She liked dating Andrea. She really did. She loved all the perks of dating a powerful woman who knew what she wanted. Except on moments like these.

Andrea was so busy, and she had built such a big empire to rule over that she would often be called away to sort out one of the many messes that occurred in her business. It would happen often, frequently. When they were on dates. When they were just having lunch or taking a walk. Even when they were just out to get some fresh air.

Andrea’s time was a valuable commodity, and it seemed that everyone wanted a part of it, and Kara would just have to get in line.

Kara sighed.

“It’s work. I’m so sorry, babe,” Andrea said, taking Kara’s hand. “Someone royally fucked up, and of course it’s up to me to fix this entire mess, lest I don’t have a company tomorrow morning.”

“But we haven’t opened the presents yet.” Kara argued. “Can’t you stay for that?”

Andrea pulled a face. “I wish that I could babe, but I really can’t. You just go ahead and open all the presents. There are nametags on the gifts I bought, as well as the receipts if anyone wants to go ahead and change gifts.”

Kara shook her head.

“That’s – that’s…”

She gave up, and sighed. “Okay.”

“You’re a lifesaver, babe,” Andrea said quickly.

“It’s okay,” Kara said with a shake of her head and a tiny smile, “they just can’t survive without you.”

Andrea smiled, and it crinkled the skin around her eyes. Kara loved that smile.

“I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”

She stood up and quickly apologised to the group, who all assured her that it was fine, and that they weren’t insulted.

“Well just in case,” Andrea smirked, “I left the bag with gifts under the tree.”

A chorus of no’s, and ‘that’s so unnecessary and unfair to you, no’s!’ rose up, but Andrea waved each one away.

She kissed Kara’s cheek.

“Eliza,” she said, “it was wonderful to meet you. I hope to see you again soon.”

“You too, Andrea,” Eliza smiled warmly. “Good luck!”

“Thank you!”

Andrea walked to the door in a brisk pace, already tapping away on her phone.

“Don’t worry, babe,” she called absentmindedly, “I’ll be ready in time to pick you up tonight, okay?”

“Okay,” Kara called after her.

Andrea opened the door, before changing her mind, and looking over her shoulder one more time.

She smirked. “Oh, and babe? I can’t wait to see what you’re going to wear tonight.”

She said one final goodbye before she was out the door.

She didn’t even hear the glass in Kara’s hand shatter.

* * *

“It’s okay, you don’t need to help, really. Just sit down,” an irritated Kara said to her mother.

“I want to help, let me.”

Kara sighed before giving up and letting her mother clean up the glass shards under the table.

She walked over to her bedroom and ignored Alex’ calls.

Kara threw open her closet and looked for anything else she could wear to that damn gala. Anything that _would_ impress Andrea, because apparently, sexy red dresses didn’t do it for her.

Just as Kara suspected, she’d worn everything in that closet already. That wouldn’t do for Andrea. The woman would be embarrassed if Kara was seen wearing anything she’d already been photographed in.

This was a disaster.

There was a soft knock on her bedroom wall, and Kara turned around to find Lena standing in the curtain opening.

“Hey,” Lena said softly.

“Hey,” Kara responded miserably.

“Can’t find anything to wear?” Lena asked, stepping inside.

Kara shook her head.

“It took me weeks to find this stupid thing. I spent so much money on it, and she didn’t even notice. She didn’t even think that it could be good enough for her stupid, stinking gala.”

Lena cracked a smile.

“Stinking, huh? That bad?”

Kara couldn’t help but smile herself, even if the humiliation and overall suckiness of the situation definitely managed to knock her down a bit.

“What am I going to do, Lena?” she asked, resting her head against the wood of her closet. “I’ve got nothing. I can’t show up in nothing. People would notice.”

Lena laughed. “While that definitely would be something,” she started, “I do want to say that your previous statement isn’t completely true. You’ve still got me.”

Confused, Kara lifted her head to look at her best friend.

“You might’ve heard,” Lena teased, “but I get invited to a lot of fancy pants parties.”

Kara let out a short laugh.

“So, I’ve got an endless supply of fancy outfits. If that’s something you’re after of course,” she added with a sweet mocking tone. “And not that it matters, but I’ve been told I’m an _excellent_ stylist.”

Kara laughed disbelievingly. “You’d really do that for me?” Kara asked softly. “You’d be like my fairy godmother for tonight?”

Lena laughed. “Well when you put it like that! How could I ever say no?”

Her eyes softened, and Kara suddenly felt so light and thankful for Lena. So immensely grateful that Lena had chosen to come back into her life. That this wonderful being had, out of all the universes and planets there were, come to exist on this very place where Kara coexisted in that very same stretch of time. It was truly a miracle.

Lena truly was a miracle.

Kara couldn’t contain herself and walked over to her friend, throwing her arms around her.

“Thanks Lena,” she muttered in her friend’s hair. “What would I ever do without you?”

Lena’s hand found their way to Kara’s upper back, and she squeezed.

“Oh, I don’t know,” Lena murmured. “You’d probably all die within a day. Seriously, for a special government agency with secret weapons and everything, you really suck at inventing things that keep you alive.”

Kara laughed, and broke the hug.

She pinked some tears she was surprised to find away and smiled lovingly at her best friend in the whole world.

“I love you, Lena,” Kara said, and she felt the truth of that statement resonate inside her. “I love you a whole lot.”

Now it seemed to be Lena’s turn to look taken aback. She blinked a few times, and Kara could see that her eyes were slightly damper than usual.

Instead of deflecting the statement like she thought Lena would, Lena managed to surprise her once again.

“I love you too,” Lena whispered huskily, the words coming out almost strangled. “A whole lot and then some.”

Kara smiled at her, and Lena looked incredibly confused for a second. Then, the other woman shook her head, and reached out her hand.

“Shall we go take a look in my closet?”

Kara accepted her hand gratefully. “We shall.”

* * *

The gala went perfectly fine.

Andrea thought she looked gorgeous in her black tulle Oscar de la Renta dress patterned with beautifully added golden leaves. She escorted her around the huge ballroom to introduce – and show her off – to all her colleagues and business partners.

Andrea certainly didn’t pale in comparison.

She looked gorgeous and powerful. She’d changed into a strapless black dress with a dark rose print and looked elegant and incredibly sexy at the same time. Kara could honestly admit that when Andrea had shown up at her door, she’d made Kara week in her knees.

Kara almost felt like the Belle of the ball on Andrea’s arm, completely overwhelmed by the beauty, the music, the food, and the all-around grandeur of the gala. She was swept up in conversations with people whose names she forgot as promptly as they were introduced.

Andrea boasted about her talented ‘star reporter’ girlfriend, and proudly tugged her around the room.

And Kara felt pretty.

And she felt lucky, being the one of Andrea’s arm, when she was frequently shot jealous glares from many of the good-looking tuxedo-clad men in the room.

Yet somehow, throughout all the glory of that evening, in that enormous crowd, on her gorgeous girlfriend’s arm, Kara felt incredibly lonely.

People only spoke to her when Andrea introduced them, and they always asked the same shallow questions about her job, her connection to Andrea, and how they’d met. Once Andrea greeted someone other, and left Kara alone with the now not strangers, they immediately lost interest in her, only talking to her when they thought it would make Andrea appreciate or notice them more.

Maybe she was making too big a deal of it.

It was just… she remembered how different galas could be.

Before… everything had gone down between her and Lena, the latter often invited – no pleaded – for Kara to join her on one of her so-called ‘tedious parties.’

Lena would thank her endlessly for agreeing to come – amidst a billion apologies for dragging her to the worst place in the world, even though Kara ardently disagreed. Lena wouldn’t mind that Kara came dressed in one of her favourite summer dresses. She would always almost squeak in excitement when she saw that Kara had arrived, even if she was in the middle of a conversation with an often bewildered -looking businessman. From the first second of her arrival to the end of the event, Lena would try to stay by Kara’s side, but not like Andrea was now.

Andrea held on to Kara but was often engaged in conversations Kara could barely follow. Lena would stay by Kara’s side, giggling and laughing as if they were sitting in Kara’s living room, watching a movie instead of at a fancy-ass gala meant to impress investors.

Lena would share all the dirty secrets she knew about the people around her, while Kara tried to stifle her embarrassed laughter, which Lena absolutely didn’t. When Kara would crack a joke about one of the stiff, conservative, bitter looking women in the room, Lena would laugh a full belly laugh, which would in turn make Kara’s resolve crack. It didn’t matter how many times they promised each other they’d be professional at a gala, the night always ended with the both of them red-cheeked, happy and regarded as if they were insane.

Lena would have to give speeches, obviously. But Lena was always so incredibly nervous – even if it was almost unnoticeable to the public – and Kara would give her tons of thumbs-ups, or big grins and silly faces to make the woman up on the stage crack a smile and relax.

Kara smiled at the memories.

Galas with Lena were incredible. And this gala was exactly the same kind of gala Lena usually held. Kara was even convinced she recognised a couple of faces from Lena’s parties. And yet, the difference between the two was startling.

Kara realised she hadn’t relaxed her shoulders once that night.

And that’s how she could pinpoint the difference between Andrea’s gala, and Lena’s. With Lena, it didn’t matter how stiff or how rude the people around her were, Lena would always manage to make it the most wonderful of parties.

Kara could never feel lonely at any of Lena’s galas, simply because Lena wouldn’t let her. Even when they were surrounded by awful people, they managed to get by, together.

And Kara suddenly missed her friend.

So, so much.

There she was, standing in a three-thousand-dollar dress that didn’t even belong to her, away from the one person who could turn this night around.

She was arm in arm with one of the most beautiful women on the planet.

And Kara felt so alone.

“You okay there, babe?”

Kara looked up to find Andrea staring at her inquisitively.

“Oh, yeah,” Kara shook her head. “My mind just,” she waved her hand, “wandered.”

Andrea shook her head with her smile. “Sometimes I do wonder where your mind goes sometimes. It seems like it’s always off some place different.”

Kara laughed uncomfortably.

If she told Andrea where her mind had wandered to, parties like this one but infinitely better, she was sure she’d break Andrea’s heart right in two.

Andrea smiled and looked her up and down.

“You really do look gorgeous, my darling.”

“Thanks,” Kara said.

“I must say, I didn’t know you owned such a marvellous piece. Oscar de la Renta,” she raised her eyebrow, “right?”

Kara smiled sheepishly.

“Eh yeah, but you eh,” she coughed, red-cheeked, “you thought right.”

Andrea tilted her head in confusion.

“It’s actually Lena’s,” Kara said by means of an explanation, cheering up just at the mention of her best friend. “She knew I still needed a dress, so she lent me this one.”

Kara twirled on the spot and beamed.

“Don’t you love it? I feel like a princess in this dress. She hadn’t even worn it before, and she let me wear it. Isn’t that just so nice?”

Andrea stilled.

The hand that had rested on the tulle of Kara’s dress froze, almost as if it had suddenly realised it was actually allergic to the fabric. She stared at Kara’s dress as if she was only seeing it now for the very first time, and not like they had spent an entire car ride and an hour and a half of gala time together. Her eyes swept up to Kara’s face, where they settled for a while, an inscrutable expression on her face.

“Lena lent you this dress?” Andrea asked slowly.

“Yeah,” Kara answered, just as slowly. “Is that… not okay?”

Two seconds went by. Then –

“Of course not, it’s fine.”

Andrea was quiet just a beat too long for Kara to fully believe her, but Kara really couldn’t tell what the issue could possibly be.

“Of course not,” Andrea repeated almost absentmindedly to herself, before placing a kiss on Kara’s cheek. She shook off the weird look in her eyes and smiled.

“You look gorgeous. Now, if you’ll excuse me – ”

She gestured to a group of men and women in the corner of the room.

“ – I really need to talk to those people. Business,” she rolled her eyes in that way of her, that made Kara would feel sorry for the awful predicaments Andrea as a CEO had to put herself through in order to keep the peace, so to speak. It had happened before, and Kara always managed to support her girlfriend.

Kara put on a smile that hurt her cheeks.

“Please, go ahead,” Kara said.

Andrea had walked away before Kara had even finished the sentence.

Kara looked around.

She was stood in the middle of the room, slightly distanced from any other people, who were standing around in little groups, talking amongst themselves about subjects Kara didn’t know the first thing about.

She rubbed her bare arms, unaffected by the physical cold, yet strangely affected by the cold that loneliness so often brings.

A waiter dressed in a white suit came up to her and wordlessly offered her a drink.

Kara accepted it with a wry smile, but he too disappeared into the crowd, leaving her alone once again.

Kara twirled around a bit more, slowly and softly, almost wondering how her night would’ve gone if she would’ve stayed at her apartment with the others, who had decided to continue the Christmas party for a bit.

Kara didn’t blame them. They were all so happy, comfortable and together.

Her shoulders almost dropped at the thought that she could’ve been there too. The only thing keeping her head up was the scolding her brain gave her. Hundreds if not thousands of people would kill for an invitation to an event like this. Here she was, in a dress that seemed to be made for an actual Disney princess, and she was complaining.

Kara guiltily rubbed her arms. She stole a glance at Andrea, who seemed to be animatedly explaining something or other to the people surrounding her, who all looked glued to her lips.

Kara smiled. Andrea was amazing at this.

Kara squared her shoulders and put her chin up.

If Andrea could do this, if Lena could, then she could as well. She was a journalist, darn it! This gala was a huge opportunity she just couldn’t let slide!

She took a deep breath before walking to the first group of people she could vaguely recognise. It was time for her to make her girlfriend proud.

* * *

Kara walked home the next day, carrying a huge bag of groceries to her apartment. She turned her key in the lock and opened the door – and almost lost her balance stumbling over five gigantic shopping bags.

“What the – ”

Kara put the groceries down in her kitchen and quickly walked over to the shopping bags.

“What’s this?” Kara asked aloud.

She opened one of the fancy light blue bags with a French label on it, and gasped.

Gorgeous dresses wrapped in thin paper were gently stacked in the bags. Kara pulled out dress after dress from the bags, sometimes encountering jewellery and shoes to go with them. Brands like Céline, Prada, and Hermes were sitting next to different bags from lesser known small boutiques.

Kara was flabbergasted

She quickly took out her phone, snapped a picture of the shopping bags, and sent it to Andrea.

Did you have anything to do with this?

She added a bunch of wide-eyed emotions and sent it off.

Her phone buzzed not a second later.

I did. Do you like the things I got you?  
I think you’ll look gorgeous in all of it.  
Now you won’t have to borrow Lena’s clothes anymore.  
xx

Kara stared at the pile of items with an accumulated value of over thousands of dollars. Did Andrea buy her all of that just so she wouldn’t dress in Lena’s clothes anymore? No, that’d be ridiculous, right? It couldn’t be. Andrea just wanted her to look nice.

But Kara bit her lip in doubt and smoothed her hand over the fabric of a thin, white, delicately woven dress.

She was driving herself crazy. Andrea was just being a good girlfriend. She was giving her gifts. She was amazing, and Kara berated herself for ever daring to think ill of her.

I love them. Can’t wait to try them on.  
Thank you <3

Her phone buzzed.

Anytime, my darling.

* * *

“Hey,” Kara touched down at the D.E.O. “You wanted to talk?”

Alex swung around to face her sister.

“Hey!” she exclaimed. “You’re here early! I thought you were still at CatCo! I didn’t expect you until, well,” she looked over her shoulder, “later.”

Kara frowned.

“I got my assignments done early,” she shrugged. “I thought I could have lunch here. Better to be early than late, right?

“Right,” Alex smiled nervously. “Totally!”

“Plus,” Kara said, walking up to one of the office chairs in the room and plopping down, “you said Lena was going to be here. I wanted to make sure you weren’t arresting her again or something.”

Alex didn’t laugh at the joke. In fact, she was tapping her hands together nervously, like she used to do when she was stressed out about an upcoming test. It was her nervous tick.

“Are you okay?” Kara asked.

She put a bag on the table, and took out two wrapped burritos, offering one to Alex.

“I brought you lunch too?”

Alex seemed to snap out of her stupor.

“That’s okay,” she said, “I’m not hungry.”

“Not hung – Alex!” Kara held up the burritos disbelievingly. “These are the real La Esquina burritos! I went all the way to New York for these!”

Alex smiled a tiny smile. “I already ate. You go on ahead.”

Kara shook her head and unwrapped her own food. “To think I would see the day where Alexandra Danvers refused a La Esquina burrito.”

Only after Kara had stuffed part of the burrito in her mouth did she realise that Alex hadn’t commented on the fact that Kara had used her real name.

Something was going on. Something really fishy had to occupy Alex’ mind for her to let such an ‘insult’ slide. Kara was definitely going to find out. Right after she finished her lunch.

Rao, was the food good.

Kara happily bit off another piece, but was rudely pulled out of her food ecstasy by the one voice that could make all of the hairs on Kara’s skin stand up straight.

“My, it’s good to see the tax dollars of the American citizens hard at work.”

Kara sighed deeply before turning her chair and looking at possibly the most agonizingly awful woman Kara had ever met in her entire life. And she’d met a lot of horrible women.

“Lillian,” Kara said with a fake smile. “Here to turn yourself in? That’s very progressive of you.”

Lillian looked back, her eyes narrowed, and her lips pressed together in a tight unlikable smile.

“Still cracking your little jokes, I see,” Lillian sniped.

Kara grinned broadly. “All part of the full Supergirl-hero-ing package. So,” she leaned forward, “how was prison?” she asked faux-cheerily.

Lillian hummed. “Wasn’t there long enough to let it make an impression. Though I hear they still have a Supergirl name plaque at one of the cells in Ryker’s. Any plans for future one-way trips?”

Kara scoffed.

“Okay,” Alex quickly intervened. “Now that we’ve all gotten reacquainted. We all need to talk.”

Kara turned to Alex and folded her arms across her chest.

“Yeah no kidding. When were you going to tell me the D.E.O. was hiring pathological second-rate criminals?”

“Please, acquitted criminal, if it’s not too much to ask.”

Kara grinded her teeth and swung her head to a smirking Lillian.

“It is too much. But thanks for checking.”

She turned back to Alex.

“Well?” she asked with big eyes.

“It’s kind of a long story. But if you could just – ”

“I can explain.”

Kara saw Lena Luthor come up behind her mother.

“Lena?”

“Hey, Kara,” Lena smiled sweetly. “Believe me. This isn’t exactly my favourite course of action either. But we have no choice.”

“Why?” Kara frowned. “What’s going on.”

Lena nodded. “Let’s talk.”

* * *

“So, just to be clear, you’re currently investigating the vague notion that there might be a big anti-alien conspiracy movement going on in right here in National City, funded my extremely rich businessmen – and women?”

Lena and Alex exchanged a look.

“That’s what it boils down to, yes.”

Kara glared at Lillian. “Sounds like Cadmus to me.”

Lillian smiled. “Cute, dear, but for once, I’m not involved.”

She looked at Alex. “Or at least I wasn’t until this one called me up and pleaded for me to help you all.”

Alex glared at Lillian now too. “I did not plead,” she argued. “I merely asked if you were interested.”

“And good thing that I was,” Lillian said, wiping some imaginary lint from her dusty-pink jacket. “You all seem to be terribly incompetent, and,” she looked around the room disdainfully, “hopelessly underfunded. I don’t know how you’re going to afford my help.”

Alex smiled.

“I’m glad you brought that up,” she beamed. “Because I talked to the DA, and they were happy to renegotiate the terms of your freedom.”

Lillian’s smile fell, and Kara could feel genuine glee bubble up inside her.

“What?” Lillian asked icily.

“Yeah,” Alex said with fake surprise, “the DA seemed to be more than happy to go through your files again, to see if there were any charges they didn’t dismiss when you talked to the FBI. I convinced them that if you helped out, they didn’t need to take a second look at all. How about that?”

“This is blackmail,” Lillian hissed.

“I know,” Alex said. “Great to have you on board, Mrs Luthor!”

Lillian huffed and crossed her arms, but didn’t say anything.

“So, now we can officially say this,” Alex said looking to Lena and Lillian. “Welcome to team Supergirl.”

Lena smiled. “Thank you, Alex. Glad that it only took me three years to get here.”

Alex shot her a look, and Kara couldn’t help but giggle.

“Team Supergirl,” Lillian scoffed, “I’d like to formally protest that team name.”

“Noted,” Alex said dryly. “Now let’s get to work.”

Kara bit her lip to keep from laughing and caught Lena’s eyes when she did. Honestly, Lena didn’t seem to fare much better. She was much better trained to keep her composure, but even she had to look away from her mother, and the corner of her mouth kept trembling, just keeping itself from becoming a wide smile.

Lena winked at her, and Kara blushed.

“Lillian, please follow me. Agent Dox and I will be needing you to tell us everything you know.”

Lillian sighed in that dreadful way of hers, before begrudgingly following Alex out of the room. The two left Alex’ office, leaving Kara and Lena by themselves.

The second the door closed behind them, Kara and Lena burst out laughing.

“I never thought I’d live to see the day where your mother selflessly offered to work with an alien,” Kara wheezed.

“You’re telling me!” Lena laughed. “Did you see the look on her face when Alex mentioned Brainy? I actually thought she was going to have a stroke right there and then.”

They both laughed for a while longer, before they slowly started regaining their composure.

Kara smiled at her friend, when suddenly –

“Oh hey!” Kara exclaimed, and Lena looked at her.

“What?”

“I forgot something!”

Lena frowned. “What?”

Kara started fishing for something in the bag she brought with her.

“Aha!”

She pulled out a messily wrapped present with a giant red bow glued to it.

“Your Christmas gift!”

“Kara,” Lena said disbelievingly, “we agreed to do presents tonight when we all got together!”

“Yeah,” Kara shuffled on her feet, “but I felt so bad for having to leave early, and not being able to open gifts with you guys… I just had to give you yours earlier. So – ”

She handed Lena the present and blushed.

“I know it’s not much, I’m on a bit of a budget this year. But I hope you like it anyway.”

Lena smiled at her. “I’m sure it’s great. Thank you,” she said softly.

Kara blushed. “Well open it!” she said quickly. “You have to see what I got you!”

Lena shook her head with a smile and started tugging at the mess of tape and paper. With a lot of effort on both parties – and some mumbled, blushing apologies from Kara – they finally got the wrapping paper off.

“What’s this?” Lena asked softly, touching the soft blue cover of a square blue book, covered in glittery lines and drawings, as well as stickers and glued on pearls. “Is this…?”

“Open it,” Kara said softly.

Lena did, and gasped.

“Kara,” she whispered.

She sank down in a chair, putting the book on her lap so she could bring one hand to cover her mouth in awe.

“Is this…?”

Her fingers glided over the many glossy photos glued on the thin pages. All of them of the two of them – sometimes with the addition of their other friends. 

“It’s a photo album,” Kara said nervously. “Photos of the two of us, you know? To commemorate our friendship?”

Lena didn’t look at her. She just turned page, after page, revelling in the wide smiles, the silly poses and the absolute happiness radiating from every single photograph.

“I, eh,” Kara stuttered, embarrassed, “I wanted to show you how happy I am you gave our friendship a second chance. I wanted to show that I’ll never take you for granted, ever again.”

Lena opened her mouth, but didn’t seem to be able to formulate an answer. She touched every single photo, and felt her heart soar at the memories.

The two of them sprawled out on the couch, in warm PJ’s, with bowls of ice cream on their laps. A picture Alex had taken when she accidentally barged in on one of their girls’ nights and had a laugh at seeing Lena Luthor in such a predicament

The both of them sticking out their tongues into the camera, a selfie taken by Kara on one of their meet-ups.

Kara and Lena, squeezed on the couch beside Alex and Sam, positively intertwined, looking so happy and at peace.

The tears shot in Lena’s eyes.

“I didn’t know you saved all of those pictures,” she whispered.

“Of course I did,” Kara smiled. “I want to remember every second of our friendship. I don’t want anything to pass us by.”

Lena looked up. She put the photo album down beside her and shot up to pull Kara into a hug.

Lena hugged like she would never let go again, but Kara didn’t mind. The closeness, the tightness, the familiarity of it all…

Kara closed her eyes and basked in the comfort of Lena’s hug. She let the smell of Lena’s perfume overwhelm her senses, and let her head find its rightful place on Lena’s shoulder, resting against Lena’s head.

A thought suddenly flashed into Kara’s head unannounced.

Kara realised how right their hugs always felt. Like their bodies were just meant to hug each other. Like each curve of Kara’s body was specially moulded to fit against Lena’s own. Like they weren’t meant to be separated.

Kara didn’t know if Lena realised that too, but Lena hand came to rest on the base of Kara’s skull, holding her so perfectly, that Kara couldn’t help but wonder if she did.

Lena took a tiny step back, her hand gliding from the back of Kara’s hand to cup Kara’s cheek. When Kara opened her eyes, she was staring right into Lena’s.

Her eyes were so intense, so beautiful. They were intoxicating swirls of blue, grey and green, and Kara felt a sudden sting, knowing that people had looked into those same heart under different circumstances, and had walked away from them.

Lena’s stories on heartbreak and sorrow were plentiful, but when Kara looked into her eyes, so close to her own, she suddenly couldn’t imagine anyone ever being able to refuse those eyes anything. Much less to actually hurt the person behind those gorgeous, soulful eyes.

“Thank you, Kara,” Lena whispered, and Kara could feel her breath touch her own lips. “This is the most beautiful gift anyone has ever gotten me. Much less made for me. I – ”

She shook her head.

“I don’t know how I could ever thank you enough for this.”

Kara blushed and shrugged.

“It’s nothing, really,” she whispered.

“Don’t say that,” Lena pleaded. “This is the most wonderful gift anyone could ever gift me. You’re, you’re…”

Lena’s words failed her. She shook her head, and pulled Kara close again, but this time, she didn’t just hug the woman. She kissed her cheek.

Kara felt her temperature shot up at the move.

Lena’s lips stilled on Kara’s cheek after the kiss, still brushing lightly against the soft skin.

“You’re my hero, Kara,” Lena breathed against her cheek. “I don’t know what I did in this life to deserve you. I love you so much.”

She pulled back, her hand still cupping Kara’s jaw, and her other hand resting on Kara’s side. Lena looked at Kara with so much _feeling_ , so much emotion, that it made Kara dizzy.

Kara’s hands rested on Lena’s upper arms, not willing to break the contact.

“I love you too, Lena,” she said with a soft smile. “So much.”

Lena made a sound and kissed Kara’s cheek again. And again. And again. She pressed kisses to both of Kara’s cheeks twice. Soft, short kisses, that pressed deep in Kara’s skin. Kisses she could feel even when Lena had taken her lips away from Kara’s face.

Right when Lena had to move her head to the side again to be able to press another kiss to Kara’s other cheek, her head seemed to halt its movement. It hesitated not right in front of Kara’s mouth, but definitely hovered over the corner of her mouth.

Kara could feel… something. She didn’t know what was coming, but she was desperate to find out. 

“I love you, Kara,” Lena whispered.

Kara wanted to answer, but the closeness of Lena’s face to her own was really starting to get to her. Her mind felt fuzzy. She felt like she was forgetting so many important things, but at the same time, she couldn’t find it in herself to care.

Kara just looked into those eyes, hopelessly captivated, unable to move, talk or blink.

Lena leaned in slowly, so incredibly slowly. She pressed a lingering kiss right next to the corner of Kara’s mouth. She could almost feel the imaginary pressure of Lena’s lips on her own. Moreover, she was almost disappointed the kiss hadn’t been just millimetres to the left. She would have killed just to feel the tiniest pressure right on her –

A blaring alarm cut Kara off mid-thought. Lena jumped back and looked up at the red lights blinking on the ceiling.

“What’s going on?” Lena asked.

“I don’t know,” Kara frowned, already getting into full Supergirl mode, “but I’m going to find out.”

Together, they walked out of the enclosed room and into the income hall.

“Alex?” Kara called out. “What do we got?”

“Where’s my mother?” Lena asked.

“I sent her on her way,” Alex said. “There’s a case. Brainy?”

“There has been an outbreak of a fire in an apartment building on Seventh Street. The entrance has been blocked by rubble, and the firefighters can’t get in and the inhabitants can’t get out.”

“On it,” Kara said. But right before she was about to lift off, Alex cursed.

“What?” Kara asked bewildered.

“There’s a huge hostage situation in the Central bank. About ten heavily armed robbers have taken thirty to forty people hostage in there. Police can’t seem to negotiate with them. They suspect some of the perpetrators are aliens.”

“Okay…?” Kara asked. “What does that mean?”

“Director Danvers,” Brainy called out.

“What?” Alex snapped. “Kind of busy here, Brainy.”

“There’s been another incident,” Brainy rapidly said. “There’s a huge shoot-out on Main Street. The instigators are shooting with alien weaponry. They’ve already confirmed three casualties.”

Alex swore.

“How the hell are there so many things happening at the same time?” Lena asked. “It’s statistically incredulous that all of those things would happen on the same – ”

“Statistics won’t help now,” Alex interrupted her harshly. “We need to contain the problem. You – ”

Alex pointed at Kara.

“I need you to get to that burning building and rescue everyone that’s trapped.”

Kara nodded seriously, and shot off into the sky.

“Brainy!”

“Yes director?”

“You take team A and deal with the robbery. I want you to take J’onn with you too. Maybe he can help.”

Brainy nodded and hurried to gather his agents.

“And you – ”

Lena jumped when Alex looked at her.

“What, me?”

“Yes, you. Suit up. We’re going with team B and we’ll deal with the shoot-out. We need everyone on board.”

She checked on Lena once.

“You up for it? You’re not an agent, so I won’t force you. But,” Alex sighed, and looked at Lena with such maturity, severity and pressure. “We could really, really use your help.”

Lena nodded, not even allowing herself to think twice. If Kara was up there saving people, so could she.

“I’m in.”

Alex shot her a brief, grateful smile, before walking off and shouting commands at her agents.

Lena blew the air out of her mouth.

“Okay,” she said. “Okay, I’ve got this. I’ve got this.”

She walked off in the direction of the dressing rooms to get ready.

* * *

Kara was breaking a sweat.

Like actual, wet, sweating. It was disgusting. Being on a planet where the atmosphere just generally had very little effect on her physiology – well, besides giving her superpowers – meant that she generally got around very non-sweatingly. She’d almost forgotten what it felt like to sweat up until a couple of months ago where she lost her powers.

But in rare moments of exertion and over-the-top superheroing, Kara’s body did actually feel the consequences of her actions.

Such as right that moment, when she was flying into the building for the sixteenth time, trying to get everybody out of the building on time, while intermittently helping out the firefighters by using her freeze breath on the building.

Contrary to popular belief, saving people from a burning fire was definitely not an easy feat. Petrified people clung to their possessions as if they would somehow save them from a fiery death. Some were unconscious due to smoke-inhalation and would be dead weight she had to carry around one person at a time, in fear of dropping someone. Others were too scared to leave, or even stalled to collect their most prized possessions.

It was exhausting.

The fire was set deliberately, Kara could tell. Every single floor was burning, and the entrance seemed to have been blocked before the fire even broke out. Some sick individual wanted to make as many people as possible suffer.

Kara flew entire families down, dropping them near the ambulances and paramedics on scene before shooting back up to go save the next couple of people.

Her breaths were heavy, and she could feel her body groan under her continuous efforts.

“Help!”

“Help us!”

Kara took a deep breath and dove back into the building.

She landed in the living room of a terrified Asian family. A father and a mother, with two young children clung to each other tightly, wet towels pressed to their mouths and noses.

“Hi,” Kara said. “I’m Supergirl, I’m here to help.”

The eyes of the girl in her mother’s arms widened.

“Supergirl,” she whispered reverently.

Kara shot her a comforting smile. “Don’t worry, I’m going to get you out. You ready?”

A sudden quake send a shockwave through the building, and the family in front of her cried out in fear.

“New plan,” Kara said. “Everybody on the couch now!”

The family hurried to get to on an old red couch, clinging to the back tightly.

“Don’t let go, okay? I’m gonna need you to stay really still while we fly. I promise I will get you down safe and sound!” Kara yelled, the rumbling and screaming obscuring her voice.

“I’m flying down on three.”

Kara gripped the couch.

“One.”

She lifted it up slightly, and the mother of the family started babbling quickly, presumingly praying to whoever could help her, while she clutched her family close.

“Two.”

Kara made sure she had a tight grip.

“Three!”

Kara rushed through the window, ignoring the fearful screams of the family as she flew them down as fast and as safely as possible.

She got to the floor quickly, and gently put the couch down.

“Everybody okay?” Kara checked.

They all seemed fine.

“Thank you, thank you!”

Usually, Kara would be more than willing to greet and talk to the people she saved, but right then, she had more important things on her mind.

She walked up to the chief of the firefighters who was holding a list of all the tenants of the building.

“Did we get everyone?” Kara panted. “I think I got everyone but I’m not sure.”

The man ran over the names quickly.

“Yeah, I think we’re – oh no.”

“What?” Kara asked alarmed. “What is it?”

“The unconscious lady you carried down? Seventh floor?” the firechief explained quickly.

“Yes? What’s up with her?”

“She has a five-year-old daughter.”

Kara’s eyes widened. “But I didn’t see – ”

Kara focussed her ears, trying to drown out all the other noises. And there it was. It was almost unnoticeable through the noise of the building crumbling down, the fire, the screaming victims and the loud sirens. But there it was, clear as day. The quiet whimpers that could only be contributed to a small child.

“Superg – ”

But Kara was already in the air.

She landed in the apartment and saw that the situation had gone south very quickly. The building was unsalvageable, even with her ice breath. The building’s structure was just too weak to support a fire that size.

Kara scanned the apartment with her X-ray, and quickly found her missing victim.

A tiny dark-haired girl was hiding away under her bed, squeezing a stuffed unicorn tightly to her chest.

Kara quickly zoomed into the room, making herself known, but it only seemed to terrify the girl. Her cries went from tiny whimpers to sobs real quick.

“Hey,” Kara leaned down until she was face to face with the girl and smiled. “Hey, my name is Supergirl. I’m here to help. What’s your name?”

The girl pushed herself away from Supergirl, closer to the wall.

The building shook once again. They didn’t have time for this. But Kara would not traumatize a kid if there was any other way.

“Is that your unicorn?” Kara asked instead. “He looks really fluffy.”

The girl hesitated, but nodded eventually.

“He’s really cute. I’m more of a mermaid kind of person, but I like unicorns too,” Kara said.

“I like mermaids too,” the girl whispered, and Kara grinned.

“That’s great! That’s – ”

The building shook again, and this time, a piece of the ceiling above them came loose and crashed on the wooden floor not five feet from where Kara was sitting.

The little girl screamed and started crying anew.

“I want my mom,” she sobbed. “I want my mom.”

“That’s good!” Kara said. “Because I know your mom! She has like dark short hair, and she was wearing a blue sweater, right?”

The little girl sniffled and nodded.

“Oh good! Cause I’ve already flown her down! I bet she’s really worried about you! She’s waiting for you to come too!”

The girl curled up into herself.

“Can you come with me?”

“I’m scared,” the girl cried. “I’m scared.”

“That’s okay,” Kara said. “I’m scared too. But you have your unicorn with you, right? I’m sure he’ll protect you just right.”

The girl sniffled and pulled her unicorn close. She didn’t budge. She didn’t want to go. But Kara could feel the flames creep closer. The scent of lighter fluid and gas reached her nose, and she knew it was only a matter of time before the whole building blew up. She knew she had to move.

“I once got separated from my mom once too,” Kara said quickly.

The girl looked up and stared at Kara with big eyes.

“Yeah, I was terrified. I thought I was never going to see her again. But I was brave. And strong, and guess what?”

“What?” the little girl asked breathlessly.

Kara smiled. “I saw her again. And she was really proud of me for holding on. Can you hold on for me?”

The girl’s lip trembled thoughtfully.

The building shook again, and Kara was about ready to give up and just drag the kid out from under the bed, when suddenly, the little hands reached out. They reached out and tugged on the material of Kara’s cape.

Kara got the hint and quickly freed the girl from her hiding spot. She picked her up and walked to the open window.

“You ready?”

The girl buried her nose in Kara’s neck and nodded.

“Okay.”

Kara pushed herself away from the windowpane and flew out into the sky. Five seconds later, an explosion on the sixth floor brought down all of the floors above it. The building would crumble down in minutes.

Kara squeezed the kid close.

“Don’t look,” she whispered before flying down.

In the time that it took to get the girl – who was apparently called Lauren – out of the building, her mother had woken up, and was almost hysterical, thinking her daughter hadn’t made it.

Kara gave her her daughter back, getting showered with tearful thank yous and hugs.

Kara smiled politely, walking away so the two could reunite in peace.

She tapped her D.E.O. comm’s device.

“Alex?” she asked. “How’s everything on your end?”

“We’re fine,” Alex answered back after a while. “Lena managed to disable the devices from a distance,” Alex sounded impressed. “After that it was a piece of cake. How about you?”

Kara looked at what was left of the smouldering building.

“We got everybody out in time,” she stated.

“Good. Agent Dox?” Alex asked over the comms.

They only received static in response.

“Agent Dox?” Alex asked again, concern creeping up in her voice.

“Brainy?” Kara asked worriedly.

Suddenly, there was a sound. A gravelly, quick sound, followed by Brainy’s voice.

“You two need to get to the D.E.O. immediately. We’ve had a crisis.”

“What?” Kara asked. “What kind?”

“A break-in,” Brainy said angrily. “One that requires you both to be here right now.”

Kara nodded. She said her goodbyes to the firemen, before shooting off, picking Alex up, and flying to the D.E.O.

It was complete and utter chaos there. Everything was overturned, there were marks all over the place, bullet holes, scorch marks… The televisions and communication devices were smashed to pieces, and there were blood spatters on the floor.

It was horrible.

Kara spotted at least three dead agents and her stomach turned.

“What happened?” Kara asked. “We were only gone…”

“It seems like someone coordinated the attacks to get us all out of the D.E.O.,” Brainy said, walking up to Alex and Kara. “They broke in mere seconds after we’d all left. There were very few people on the scene as we had an all hands on deck situation.”

Kara shook her head.

“Well, what did they want?” Alex asked agitatedly. “Weapons? Information? Hostages?”

Brainy shook his head.

“No director,” he said grimly. “They emptied out all of our holding cells. All of the aliens in our custody are gone.”

“Dead?” Kara asked horrified. “They killed them?”

“No, Supergirl,” Brainy shook his head. “The aliens are nowhere to be found. They’ve all been taken by the burglars.”

“They took our prisoners? All of them?”

“W-wait,” Kara said shaking her head. “That doesn’t make any sense. What could they possibly want with already contained aliens, if it’s not to kill them on sight?”

She motioned at the dead agents on the floor. “They clearly didn’t have any qualms about shooting people?”

Brainy looked from Kara to Alex. “I’m afraid I have no answer to that question, Supergirl. All I know is that not one cell was left alone. All of the aliens were taken.”

“Whatever it is they want,” Alex trembled in rage and powerlessness, “I doubt they’re planning anything good. Not if they were willing to go over so many dead bodies to do it.”

Kara couldn’t help but silently agree. She watched as one of the other agents covered a fallen one with a white sheet, so they could be taken away in peace and tranquillity.

“We need to figure out who they are fast,” Kara whispered. “No human or alien is safe as long as they continue their operations.”

She turned to Alex.

“Let’s get the team together.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! 
> 
> I’m updating twice today (on this story and the Finding our way back story) to celebrate that I passed my exam! Yay!!! 
> 
> Here are the links to Kara and Andrea's dresses: 
> 
> [Kara’s dress](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/212021095055035091/)  
> 
> 
> [Andrea’s dress](https://www.prada.com/hk/en/products.dark_rose_print_cady_dress.P39B0_1U60_F0011_S_192.html)
> 
> Thank you so much for your enthusiasm, your love and your patience. I hope you liked this chapter as much as I did! Lots of action and story development! I hope Lillian's entree was okay for everyone, I looooved writing her so much!
> 
> I’m sorry about the wait, I hope it didn’t take too long. 
> 
> I’ve read every comment on this fic, and I love every single one of them. You guys are amazing, and your enthusiasm really keeps me from giving up on these fics. I hope you had fun reading this chapter, the next one is already on its way.
> 
> Please let me know what you thought, either here or on [my Tumblr!](https://thingsanddreamsandstuff.tumblr.com)
> 
> If you have any sort of prompts you think I might like to write, please send me a message on Tumblr! I love writing fan fiction, and I can't wait to write some more :) 
> 
> See you next time!


	12. Chapter 12

Kara groaned.

This had been the suckiest day in ages. Literally, the worst. Day. In. Ages.

The five of them, Kara, Lena, Alex, Lillian and Brainy were stuck at the D.E.O. in one of their blandest, greyest meeting rooms. The windowless room, whose only light came from the holographic screen hovering above the table, seemed to slowly suck the joy and the life from everybody in there.

Alex had dark circles under her eyes and kept mumbling the same things over and over again, going over the limited information they had. She was half sprawled over the table, bowed over stacks of documents. Lillian had started filing her nails forty-five minutes ago and had somehow managed to still look perfectly present, not a hair out of place in her perfect chignon, and completely focussed on the subject on the table.

Brainy had started typing rapidly on a D.E.O. iPad two hours ago and hadn’t stopped since.

Kara herself was half asleep on the conference table, barely keeping herself upright on her elbows, her eyelids drooping every few seconds.

Even Lena seemed to be nodding off. She still sat upright, looking in Alex’ direction as if she were still paying perfect attention to what was being said, but Kara knew it was all make-believe. Shine. The way she’d been trained to remain rigid in long L-Corp meetings.

Her beautiful eyes were glazed over and her heartbeat was so slow, it was a miracle the woman hadn’t actually fallen asleep yet.

“Maybe if the people involved meet up somewhere?” Alex murmured.

“Yes,” Kara said tiredly, “you said that two hours ago.”

Alex hummed, but the comment didn’t seem to get to her. She kept turning the pages of the documents, stacking them all up according to a system only she knew.

Alex phone buzzed for the fourth time that day. Alex glanced at her girlfriend’s photo before pressing the red phone button, effectively cutting off the connection.

They were too busy for social calls, she’d said earlier on.

Alex turned a page and continued her mumbling as if she were never interrupted. It was impossible. Kara suspected that if it were up to Alex, they’d work all through the week without even taking a break. As if the pages would somehow magically give them some answers they didn’t have ten hours ago.

When Lena leaned forward in her chair, only to jump back, apparently shocking herself awake, Kara decided that enough was enough.

She scraped her throat loudly, which was enough to break through Alex’ mumblings and Brainy’s tapping, the only sounds in the room.

Alex looked at her in surprise.

“Supergirl?” she asked.

“We’ve been at this for hours now, Alex,” she complained. “We don’t know what’s going on, we don’t know who’s in charge, and we haven’t gotten anywhere close to getting any answers. Can we please, _please_ take a break?” she begged. “The suit’s really getting uncomfortable.”

She shifted unhappily in the black D.E.O. chair.

“Well maybe if you could stop complaining for two seconds we would get somewhere,” Lillian snided.

“What, because you’ve been so helpful today?” Kara countered.

“Okay,” Alex intervened, “it’s been a long day. I think Supergirl might have a point and – ”

Lillian ignored her. “I’ve sacrificed my very valuable time. The fact that I’m not charging you is reason enough for you to thank me on your bare knees.”

“You’re such a martyr,” Kara mocked, clutching her chest dramatically. “Why, how ever could we thank you enough for sacrificing the time you would have spent drunk or at brunch here by criticising us?”

“Don’t forget, little girl,” Lillian spat, “without me, you wouldn’t even have known about this whole organisation. I’m doing you a favour.”

“How very gracious of you,” Kara replied sarcastically.

“What’s with the Supergirl thing, anyway?” Lillian scoffed. “Why does everyone in this room still address you like that? Do you need some self-aggrandising name to boost your ego? We all know who’s hiding under that hideous suit. Why do we need to keep up the charade? We all know it’s Kara Danvers.”

She spit out the name like it was a splash of a four-dollar bottle of wine she had the displeasure of taking a sip of.

“Okay, let’s settle down,” Alex stood up, slightly alarmed.

At least everyone was awake again.

Lena was sitting up straight, her eyes darting between her mother and Kara, her mouth half-open, as if she was stuck in her doubts on whether it was up to her to speak up or not.

Brainy was using his iPad as a shield, his eyes sticking out with a worried look over the black screen.

“Look,” Alex continued, “if we could all just – ”

“You know what, Lillian?” Kara stood up and turned to the older Luthor with an angry scowl. “I’ve had a very, _very_ long day. In the last twelve hours I saved dozens of people from being burned to death – ”

Lillian rolled her eyes.

“I had to help transport the bodies of three people I knew to the freaking morgue, and I had to sit in a meeting with you of all people! What have you done besides sitting here making snide remarks at everybody?”

She stood up and approached Lillian Luthor with a furious anger she didn’t know she had. To her credit, the other woman didn’t budge. She merely looked bored with the entire situation.

“I’m tired,” Kara snarled. “I’m angry. I’m frustrated. And I’m definitely not in the mood to be lectured by someone as vile, morally rotten and despicable as you. So if I were you, I’d. Shut. The hell. Up.”

Lillian stared at her for a few seconds with a burning intensity, that either meant that she wanted to kill Kara on the spot, or that she was surprisingly impressed by Kara’s ability to stand up to her.

Since Kara didn’t find a Kryptonite blade embedded in her chest, she thought it might be the latter.

Lillian didn’t say anything. She leaned back in her chair thoughtfully and merely seemed to wait for Kara to speak up again.

“Look,” Lena interrupted the tension in the room. “This arguing isn’t going to get us anywhere. The truth is, we don’t know anything. And by standing around yelling at each other, we’re not going to find out much more.”

She looked to Alex for support, who nodded tiredly.

“Lena’s right. We’ve been at this a long time, we’re all tense.” She rubbed the bridge of her nose tersely. “This has been a harrowing day for all of us. Let’s just go home and regroup tomorrow. How does that sound?”

Lillian scoffed and stood up. Staring Kara straight in the eye, she wiped some imaginary dust from her perfectly straight pink blazer.

“That might be the most intelligent thing you’ve said all day,” Lillian commented.

Kara balled her fists in anger. She couldn’t talk to Alex that way!

“Great!” Alex said unenthusiastically. “I’ll have someone drive you home. Please wait for future instructions from us, and please don’t leave the state in the meantime.”

Lillian made an undignified sound, between a scoff and a scowl, which Kara derived great pleasure from.

“Bye, bye now Lillian,” she said.

“Cheerleader,” Lillian said dismissively, and walked towards the door. Brainy walked her out after an encouraging nod from Alex.

Kara shook her head. Once she heard the door fall shut, she turned to Alex.

“I will never forgive you for making me work with her,” she said.

Alex sighed tiredly. “Believe me, you and me both. I need a drink.”

“Ditto,” Lena rubbed her brow.

Alex went to her desk and fished three lukewarm beers out of a drawer. Kara shot her a disapproving glare before shaking her head.

Alex shrugged, put one of the beers back in the drawer, took one for herself and slid the other over to Lena, who gratefully accepted it

“I don’t know how you survived your entire childhood with that woman,” Alex commented, plopping down in her chair. “One more minute with her and I would’ve shot myself with my service gun.”

“Well, for one, I wasn’t there much. Went off to boarding school the first chance I got.”

Alex made an appraising sound.

“Well, I’ll leave you to it,” Kara said. “I need to get back home. I have some work to finish.”

“Fine by me,” Alex said taking sip from her bottle.

Kara looked between the two of them.

“Please don’t overdo it with the drinking, please,” Kara said, more to Alex than to Lena. It was Lena though, who smiled, and promised not to.

“Bye guys.”

“Bye.”

A whoosh of air, and then Kara was gone.

Alex and Lena sat in silence, taking sips from their beer, and staring at the dark walls around them.

“Lillian was kind of right,” Lena eventually said. “We got zero shit done today.”

Alex sighed in her bottle. “You’re telling me.”

Lena paused.

“If we really do need extra information – which, we do – we need to go and get some. We can’t keep waiting for the information to come to us, like Lillian did.”

Alex shook her head.

“Look, I hear you. I just don’t know how or where we’re going to get that information.”

Lena hummed thoughtfully. She took a sip from her beer.

“Hand me that list again?”

Alex pushed the list of the names of all the people who’d bought up terrain in National City.

Lena took a pen out of her bag and started going over each and every name carefully. She frowned and started placing tiny crosses next to a couple of names.

“L-Phone,” Lena called out, “pull up my calendar.”

Her phone lit up, and an overflowing list of activities sprung up on the calendar app.

“Filter out everything that isn’t an event, gala or happening I’ve been invited to.”

The phone flickered, and in less than a second, a short list appeared.

Alex looked up attentively, finally becoming more interested in what Lena was doing.

“Please pull up all the guest lists of these events,” Lena said, taking out her L-Pad and scanning the lists Alex had given her.

“Now cross-reference the names on the incoming document,” Lena said.

The phone loaded for two seconds, before it produced three events.

Lena eyed the screen critically before nodding. She slid the phone over to Alex.

“Seventeen of the people on that list are going to attend a gala next weekend. How much do you want to bet the leaders of that group are going to be there?”

“To discuss the project inconspicuously with their conspirators in a public setting?” Alex asked impressed.

“I’ll do you one better,” Lena leaned in. “All those rich people in one place? They could be recruiting others.”

Alex looked up with big eyes.

“They’ll use the gale to lobby?”

“In my experience, that’s the main reason people attend galas in the first place. Everyone wants something. Galas are the place to get it. Support, money, business partners…” She clacked her tongue. “You name it, someone will provide it for you.”

“So,” Alex clarified, “all out persons of interest will be gathered in one place next weekend, discussing the one thing we’re after.”

Lena nodded. “That’s my guess.”

“Luthor,” Alex shook her head with a grin, “once again, you’ve managed to impress me.”

Lena shrugged languidly, but she couldn’t hide her satisfied smile.

“I try.”

“But wait,” Alex frowned, taking the list in her hand. “You’re invited to this event?”

“Yeah, I always get invited to these things,” she rolled her eyes. “I never go, though. I organise my own galas. I loathe going to others unless it’s absolutely necessary. It would raise suspicions if I suddenly did show up there.”

Alex leaned back in her chair dejectedly.

“So we have no way of getting in.”

“I wouldn’t say that.”

Alex frowned.

“No offence, Luthor, but I’m really tired. Can you just give it to me straight? I’d hate to keep guessing.”

Lena rolled her eyes. “What I mean is, I’m not the only Luthor invited to those parties. Lillian is no stranger to galas like the one we’re looking at.

“Oh God,” Alex buried her face in her hands.

“Look,” Lena insisted. “We brought my mother on for a reason. She knows those people. She’s socialised with them. At the very least, using her to infiltrate that party gives us eyes on the situation.”

“Yeah, or she could betray us and give them everything we know!” Alex countered.

“Which isn’t a lot, Alex!”

“All we have is their ignorance! They don’t know we’re investigating them! We can’t give that away!”

“Well then what do you propose we do, Alex?” Lena asked exasperatedly. “You want to let our only chance to obtain more information fly because you’re too crabby to trust a Luthor?”

“I’m just saying, I don’t feel good about placing all our bets on Lillian!” Alex exclaimed heatedly. “I’d feel much better about having a second set of eyes on the scene. Someone we can trust _not_ to field for the anti-alien assholes.”

“Right,” Lena leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest. “And how many agents do you have that get an invite to social events like this one?”

She raised her eyebrow obnoxiously and Alex huffed in frustration.

“I don’t know!”

“Exactly! You don’t get many celebrities over the floor at the D.E.O.”

Alex nodded begrudgingly, before suddenly stilling.

“What?” Lena asked.

“Oh God,” Alex muttered, rubbing her face. “Oh God.”

“What?” Lena asked irritably, waiting for an answer.

“Well,” Alex explained, “it wasn’t exactly here, but we did get one celebrity in D.E.O. territory. Back when the Daxamites attacked.”

“Well, is it someone who’d get invited to one of these galas?” Lena asked.

“Most definitely.”

“Are they pro-alien?”

“Oh yes. A little too pro-alien if you ask me.”

“Do you think they’d want to help?”

“I would bet on it,” Alex said.

“Alright,” Lena said. “Let’s contact them and send them to the event with Lillian to keep an eye out.”

Alex sighed. “Fine. But you get to tell Kara that we’re inviting Cat Grant on a D.E.O. mission.”

“What?!”

* * *

A movie was playing on her TV, but with all the good-will and honesty in the world, Kara couldn’t tell you what movie was playing.

She was sitting in Andrea’s lap, languidly kissing her girlfriend. One hand rested on Andrea’s shoulder, while the other carefully cupped the woman’s perfect cheek. Andrea, meanwhile, was clutching at Kara’s hips, bunching up her skirt just a little, and pulling her closer whenever Kara became bolder in her kissing.

There was nothing but Andrea.

Her hot breath on her lips, her soft, wet tongue licking in Kara’s mouth. The teeth that pulled on her lips whenever Kara leaned in close enough to connect their upper bodies completely. Andrea’s soft moans that made Kara giddy because _she_ had pulled those sounds out of Andrea.

The way Andrea would tug forcefully on Kara’s hip when Kara sucked on the tip of Andrea’s tongue. The way Andrea’s perfume invaded all of Kara’s senses, and made any coherent thinking impossible.

There was only Andrea.

And it was nice. It was comfy.

Or it had been ten minutes ago.

Kara was actually getting tired, and hungry! Andrea had taken her to the fanciest restaurant in town, and Rao knows the food was delicious, but darn it! The portions had been so incredibly small that Kara was dying to get some major high-calorie food inside her. Preferably pizza. Topped with some hamburgers. And some potstickers.

God she was hungry.

But Andrea had walked her up to her apartment, and with a wicked grin, had pushed her on the couch to make out. They’d since changed positions a little bit, and the making out had grown slower and more deliberate than before, but Kara was getting a bit bored with the constant licking and kissing and sucking.

She was hungry.

But she couldn’t very well tell Andrea that.

Andrea, whose hands were starting to slide down just a little. Just over the line where her dress stopped and her bare legs began. Andrea’s hands landed there, on the tan skin of her thighs, just above her knees. Her fingers drew small circles on the skin she found there, and then, her hands went up.

This time though, she reached under the dress.

Kara felt herself stiffen against Andrea’s lips.

Andrea’s hands kept sliding up, while Andrea’s mouth slid lower, misinterpreting Kara’s stillness for arousal. She pressed kisses to the underside of Kara’s jaw, to her neck, to her collar bone.

Kara felt her heart race when Andrea’s hands under her dress had slipped so high, they were almost reaching her panties.

Clearly, Andrea had a goal in mind. With a sickening feeling, Kara realised that Andrea might have thought that tonight was the night.

She’d taken her out for a fancy dinner, Kara had worn one of the sexier new dresses Andrea had gotten her, and she had been open to a full-on make-out session.

Kara’s heart started to beat a little faster.

Had she led Andrea on? Was Andrea under the impression that Kara was playing hard to get? Was Andrea going to be frustrated when Kara stopped her?

Kara’s thoughts were interrupted by a brief knock on the door, and Kara could’ve sobbed in relief.

“I’ll have to get that,” Kara quickly said, already trying to slid off Andrea’s lap.

“No, don’t,” Andrea protested, pulling at Kara’s thighs to keep her on her lap. “It can’t be that important.”

She kissed up Kara’s jawline, her hand resuming the path they were already on.

A second knock couldn’t even deter Andrea.

“I should at least check it out,” Kara rambled. “It could be important.”

“Babe,” Andrea husked seductively, “stay.”

“I – oh!”

Kara was interrupted when Andrea brought her hands up to Kara’s face, and pulled her close, enabling her to kiss Kara deeply and intimately.

Kara hummed when Andrea licked into Kara’s mouth, hungry, forcefully, like it was the very first time they’d done that.

Kara tried to pull herself away.

“Andrea, I really think – ”

“Shhh, relax, baby,” Andrea whispered. “You’re so pretty like this.”

Kara let herself get tugged back, clueless as to how she could get out of the embrace without hurting Andrea’s feelings.

When a third knock broke through their kissing sounds, even Andrea couldn’t ignore it anymore.

“Whoever’s behind that door better have a killer reason for being here,” she huffed, crossing her arms.

“Yeah,” Kara said, quickly jumping away from Andrea and making her way to the front door. “Must be important.”

Inwardly, she couldn’t care if it was her old neighbour who needed her to change her television channel, or the president of the United States who needed her to help out with a mission that should save the multiverse, she would open the door for literally anyone who could get her out of her predicament right then.

Her glasses prevented her from seeing through the door, so Kara definitely wasn’t prepared for the sight that greeted her when she swung open the door.

“Kara!”

“Lucy?!”

“Oh my God!” Lucy squealed, dropping her gigantic suitcase uncaringly to the ground, and jumping up to wrap her arms around her friend. “Oh my God! Kara!”

Kara finally recovered from her surprise and tugged her friend impossibly close.

“Oh my God,” Kara whispered, tears jumping in her eyes, covering her mouth with one hand, her other clutching Lucy so close as if she could disappear in a flash. “Lucy is that really you?”

Lucy laughed tearily. “Of course it’s me, you silly, blonde alien! God, I’ve missed you.”

Lucy’s words broke something inside of Kara, and tears of joy started rolling down her cheeks.

“You’re back,” Kara whimpered in Lucy’s hair. “You came back. You actually came back.”

Lucy took a step back and looked at Kara with all the love in the world. She smoothed Kara’s blonde curls down softly, to get a better look at her friend.

“Of course I came back. How could I not?”

Lucy wiped some of Kara’s tears away with her thumbs.

“Now why are you crying? It’s just me.”

“Well you’re crying too,” Kara laughed through her tears.

Lucy gingerly touched her own face and didn’t seem at all surprised to find the traces of wet tears there.

“I guess I am,” she grinned. “You can’t imagine how much I’ve missed you, Kara Danvers.”

“Not nearly as much as I missed you,” Kara said, hugging Lucy again. “God, Lucy,” she whispered. “Where have you been?”

“Oh,” Lucy’s laugh cracked. “Here, there. All over, really.”

“Well,” Kara said once they’d separated slightly, still holding on to each other a little, “it’s good to have you back.”

“Babe?”

Kara turned around to see Andrea stand in the door opening, arms crossed over her chest, and an eerie, cold smile on her face.

“Who’s this?”

She walked a few paces towards Kara and Lucy and draped her arm possessively over Kara’s shoulders.

Kara blushed at the sudden intrusion in her conversation.

“Andrea,” she said awkwardly, “meet Lucy. My friend.”

“My, you do have many friends,” Andrea muttered, before shaking her head. “Hi,” she said, extending her hand, “I’m Andrea Rojas, Kara’s girlfriend.”

Lucy didn’t seem deterred by Andrea’s sudden clinginess. In fact, she looked rather amused.

“Lucy Lane. Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise,” Andrea replied. “I see you’ve got a suitcase with you. Did you need – ”

She cursed when her phone started ringing. She sighed.

“Just a minute, please,” she said, narrowing her eyes at Lucy before walking away to pick up her phone.

“Please come in!” Kara said, taking Lucy’s suitcase and rolling it inside. “Oh my God, I seriously can’t believe you’re actually here again!”

“You’re telling me!” Lucy laughed. “I mean look at this place!”

She twirled on the spot and took in all of Kara’s apartment.

“It feels like no time has passed and nothing has changed! Although…”

She looked passed Kara and smirked at the sight of Andrea pacing around in front of Kara’s bedroom, arguing in low tones with whomever was on the other end of the line.

She turned back to Kara with a raised eyebrow. “Well maybe _some_ things have changed.”

Kara blushed.

“It’s a long story,” she whispered.

Lucy laughed and pulled Kara close by her hands.

“Baby, for you I’ve got all the time in the world.”

Kara beamed.

“Literally though,” Lucy shrugged. “I’ve got no job, no boyfriend, and no sister I want to visit. I’m all yours for however long you’ll have me.”

“Lucy – ”

“Babe, I’ve gotta run,” Andrea said, picking up her jacket. “Work.”

“But we have reservations at that Italian place,” Kara protested.

Andrea rushed through the apartment, picking up her stuff from all over.

“I’ll make it up to you,” Andrea said, eyes glued to her phone screen, “I promise.”

Kara sighed. “Do you need me to save you some food then?”

“I’ll get something on the go,” Andrea said distractedly.

When she finally reached the duo, she eyed Lucy suspiciously. “Besides,” she added, “I’m sure you and Lucy need some time to catch up.”

Lucy grinned.

“I’ll make sure she won’t be lonely without you,” Lucy quipped.

Andrea’s smile seemed to freeze on her face. Her eyes narrowed, and her aura had never seemed more frightening and frigid.

“I’m sure you will,” Andrea smiled icily.

Kara glared at Lucy, who didn’t look at all apologetic for her joke. If possible, her smile got even wider when she saw the expression on Andrea’s face.

“Well,” Andrea said, wrapping her arm around Kara, but keeping her eye on Lucy. “If you’ll excuse me,” she whispered, before leaning in and surprising Kara with an uncomfortably long kiss to her lips.

Andrea leaned back and licked her lips with a smirk.

“Duty calls.”

She picked up her bag and strutted over to the door.

“Have fun,” she called out.

“We will,” Lucy yelled.

Kara buried her face in her hands when she heard the door close just a little harder than it probably should.

* * *

“So let me get this straight,” Lucy said, licking thoughtfully around her spoon.

They were both lounging on the couch in their sweats, sharing a tub of rocky road icecream – well, mostly sharing. Kara was very hungry after all – and exchanging all the stories they could think of. Well, at least Kara was. Lucy’s time in the military was basically top secret from start to finish. Other than some minor vague details Lucy had provided, Kara was none the wiser about where she’d spent the last four years of her life.

“You didn’t end up dating James, even after I basically handed him to you on a silver platter.”

Kara bit her lip. “No?”

“Then you ditched the whole assistant thing, became an actual reporter, your sister finally realised what all of us already knew and embraced her sapphic side. Then you dated an honest to god freaking prince– ”

“Whose mother tried to kill me,” Kara added helpfully.

“Whose mother tried to kill you,” Lucy confirmed. “Then you ditched him, fought some supervillains – one of which who turned out to be one of your friends – ”

Kara nodded.

“You became best friends with the most cut-throat CEO who also happened to be your cousin’s archnemesis’ sister along the way; your mother and Argo turned out to still be alive, Lex freaking Luthor broke out of jail, found some creepy clone of yours, manipulated the country to rise up against you, Alex forgot who you were, Lena shot Lex, he told her about your Superhobby, you lost her friendship, got it back, and now you’re dating another hot CEO lady?”

Kara went over the events of the last five years in her head to see if she missed something.

“Yeah,” Kara confirmed. “That’s basically everything.”

Lucy leaned back in the couch cushions with a pout.

“Man,” she begrudged, “I always miss everything.”

Kara smiled, but took pity on the girl.

“You didn’t miss _everything_ ,” she argued.

“I missed both of the Danvers’ girls gay awakenings!” Lucy exclaimed. “That’s a tragedy with a capital T.”

Kara rolled her eyes.

“Stupid military with their stupid jobs and their stupid offices in the middle of stupid fucking nowhere,” Lucy muttered angrily to herself. “I can’t believe I even missed you becoming a reporter.”

Lucy’s eyes softened at the statement.

“You’re a wholeass professional reporter!”

Kara smiled shyly.

“I’m so proud of you,” Lucy said crawling over the precariously placed tub of icecream and kissing the top of Kara’s head. “You deserve all the success in the world.”

“Thanks Luce,” Kara blushed once Lucy had sat back down. “I really missed you.”

“Ugh, same!” Lucy said. “Honestly, we should celebrate the fact that we’re back in each other’s lives! We should do something!”

A light went on in Kara’s head.

“Well hey,” she said, “we’re having a sort of continuation of Christmas tomorrow evening – ”

“A second Christmas?” Lucy frowned.

“Long story,” Kara shook her head. “It’s just a get together with drinks and some gifts but,” she smiled, “you could come too! We’ll have some drinks, dress up! It’ll be great!”

“Danvers,” Lucy saluted her with a raised spoon, “I’ve always said you had a bit of a genius gene inside of you.”

Kara laughed, and bumped her spoon against Lucy’s.

“To friends.”

“To elongated holiday celebrations.”

“Cheers.”

* * *

“Oh man,” Sam sighed, “we need to do this every year.”

“Do what?” Kara smiled.

She was stretched out comfortably on the couch, relishing in the easy banter with her friends. Everything was slow, easy and just, genuinely perfect.

“Open gifts after Christmas!” Sam exclaimed. “It makes the holiday last so much longer!”

Alex laughed.

“You’re right about that,” she smiled, and took a sip from the amazing thirty-year-old scotch Lena had brought with her. “This feels like an endless week of amazing parties.”

“And Lord knows we deserve a week of holidays,” Lena said, raising her glass.

Kara smiled and curled up against the pillows.

“You agree, Kara?” Alex asked, tilting her head.

Kara made a content sound from underneath the soft blankets she’d thrown over herself half-way through the evening.

She hummed affirmatively and the others laughed.

“Are you tired, Kara?” Lena asked with a soft smile. “If you want to kick us out, you can. We’ll understand.”

“No!” Kara protested. “Don’t go. Lucy’s coming by in a minute! Andrea too. I like it when you guys are here. I just,” she stroked the new fuzzy blanket Sam had gotten her. “I feel so warm and cuddly right now.”

“Well, I’m glad you like it,” Sam smiled.

“So much,” Kara all but moaned. “I’m never putting it down again.”

The door opened and Andrea walked in.

“Sorry, I’m late,” she apologised, kicking off her heels and dropping her purse. “Work was insane, you can’t even imagine.”

She quickly shimmied out of her beautiful black coat and walked over to the living room.

“Hi guys,” she said, completely at ease around Kara’s friends already.

“And hey you,” she murmured, leaning over the couch’s arm to get closer to Kara.

Kara’s whispered _hey_ got lost in Andrea’s lips when the woman pressed forward uncaringly, kissing Kara slowly.

Kara blushed when she heard some uncomfortable coughs coming from the couch opposite her own, and lightly pushed Andrea away.

She really loved Andrea, but public displays of affection somehow felt a little awkward with her – especially around her friends.

Andrea didn’t seem at all deterred, and simply smacked her lips with a wink before walking around to sit down next to Kara while the conversation between Nia, Sam, Lena and Alex picked up again. 

Andrea sat so close that Kara could easily slip into her embrace, her knees curling up on Andrea’s thighs, and Andrea’s arm coming up around her shoulders.

“What did I miss?” Andrea asked.

“Nothing much,” Kara whispered. “We exchanged the last Christmas gifts we couldn’t give out last time. Then we decided to kind of convert it to a girl’s night, anyway.”

“Oh,” Andrea tucked some hair behind Kara’s ear. “That’s nice.”

“It was,” Kara smiled. “Sam got me this amazing blanket, feel how soft!”

Kara rubbed the material against Andrea’s skin, and Andrea laughed, before gently pushing the blanket down.

“I can feel it, thank you. How did Nia like her gift?”

“I loved it!” Nia exclaimed, and both Andrea and Kara turned their heads to look at her.

“Sorry,” she mumbled. “I heard my name.”

Kara laughed. “It’s okay. I’m just so glad you like it.”

“Are you kidding?”

Nia picked up the personalised reporter’s notepad Kara had made for her. It was covered in tiny paintings by Kara’s own hand, and featured tiny gemstones and motivational quotes. It came with a beautiful old-school fountain pen Kara had found in a tiny stationary store and didn’t have the heart to leave behind.

“I’ve got a real reporter’s notepad! And it’s beautiful!”

“Every reporter has got to have their own pad,” Kara explained seriously. “I get that iPads are faster, but they’re just not the same thing. Notepads are, like, the foundation of journalism.”

“That or the integrity and commitment to always inform the public of the truth,” Alex noted dryly.

Kara stuck out her tongue.

“Well I think it’s lovely,” Andrea commented, kissing Kara’s temple. “And so thoughtful.”

Kara beamed, but from the corner of her eye, she could see Lena roll her eyes at Sam, who gave her a look.

Lately, it had become more and more obvious that Lena really didn’t like Andrea all that much.

Every time they were both in the same room, they barely exchanged two words, both opting to sit on opposite sides of the room. Andrea was always polite, and Lena was always courteous, and yet, the two women in the room with the most in common – both having gone to the same boarding school, the both of them having fought their way to the top of the business industries as the top female CEO’s in National City – found the least to talk about.

It made Kara feel incredibly uncomfortable.

She truly didn’t know how to handle the situation. One the one hand, she felt like it was her duty to keep her girlfriend happy. On the other hand, she’d just gotten Lena back. She couldn’t just lose her over something stupid.

Alex seemed unable to help, completely swept up in her troubles with Kelly. She didn’t need to hear about Kara’s tiny, little non-problems.

They had bigger things to worry about.

“So Alex,” Andrea said conversationally. “Where’s Kelly?”

Everybody in the room stiffened.

“I feel like I haven’t seen her in ages! How’s she doing?”

Andrea seemed either completely unaware of the sudden tension in the room, or she wasn’t the type to back away from an uncomfortable conversation. Either way, it put all of them in an awkward situation.

“Eh, Andy,” Kara whispered, “I don’t think.”

“It’s fine, Kar,” Alex said. She turned to Andrea. “Kelly’s with James right now. She decided she needed a little her time.”

Alex said it simply, very matter-of-factly. But Kara could just feel the hurt and the insecurity behind those words. Kara didn’t know why exactly Kelly had gone to stay with James, but nothing in Alex’ words reassured Kara.

“That’s too bad,” Andrea commented. “Especially when she wasn’t here for real Christmas either. I missed seeing her there.”

“Andy,” Kara said softly.

Alex’s smile tightened. “Yeah.”

She ran a hand through her short hair.

“Well, actually,” she mumbled, looking down in her lap. “Kelly won’t be joining us any time soon.”

Kara leaned forward, moving out of Andrea’s embrace.

“Alex?” she asked concerned.

Alex sighed, before looking at Kara.

“We broke up.”

A chorus of horrified sounds rose up from the room, but Alex closed her eyes and shook her head.

“It’s fine, it’s fine,” she waved away their concerns. “I didn’t want to bring it up, cause I didn’t want to be a downer.”

“Alex,” Kara admonished. “You’re never a downer.”

She broke away completely from Andrea – who made a disgruntled sound – and ran over to plump herself down between Alex and Lena – who barely had time to protect her glass of wine– and wrapped her entire body around her sister like some sort of sloth.

“You should have told me,” Kara said, snuggling into her sister. “I’m so sorry.”

Alex sighed, but rested her head on Kara’s head anyway.

“I know,” Lena whispered.

“Oh Alex, that sucks,” Nia said softly.

“I’m so sorry, Alex,” Sam said.

She truly did look apologetic too.

Alex smiled sadly before shaking her head.

“Don’t worry about it, really. It was a long time coming.”

Kara squeezed her sister a little tighter.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled against Alex’ sweater.

Alex let out a shuddering breath.

“Yeah me too,” she said in a smaller voice.

“This is ridiculous,” Sam said. “Alex, you need some time to process this. Let’s just all go home and leave you and Kara to talk and hug it out.”

“Yes,” Lena said, and Nia nodded in agreement.

“No, no,” Alex protested, “I don’t want to feel sorry for myself. If I did, I would’ve stayed home. Look,” she argued, turning to an unconvinced Sam, “I need to be distracted right now, okay? I need to be with my friends, and laugh, and,” she waved her hand distractedly, “be happy. Can we just do that? Just for tonight?”

She looked around the group questioningly.

Sam rolled her eyes and sighed.

“Well, if it makes her feel better,” Andrea said, leaning back.

“I can get wanting to be with friends instead of staying at home all alone,” Lena said next to Kara, and Kara shot her a warm smile.

Lena was sitting so close since Kara had plumped herself between her friend and her sister, that their bodies were basically squished together.

But Kara didn’t mind that at all.

“While I want the record to show that I do not think this is healthy behaviour,” Sam arched an eyebrow, “I won’t let you wallow in sadness alone,” she acquiesced.

Alex smiled relieved.

“But,” Sam warned, “I will be keeping tabs on you, Danvers. If I see one sign of you being sad or feeling unwell, I’m taking you straight home.”

Alex blushed and coughed awkwardly.

“You guys are the worst,” she said lovingly, snuggling into Kara. “But thank you.”

Suddenly, the door was thrown open, and a haggard looking Lucy Lane dropped inside, carrying about seven different fancy looking bags.

“Oh my God, you guys, I’m so sorry I’m late!”

She closed the door, shed her black coat, and revealed her silver glittery dress that was so short, it made everybody in the room both impossibly fascinated, and weirdly unsettled at the same time.

“Lucy Lane?” Alex said slowly.

“Oh,” Lucy looked up and a grin slowly spread over her face. “Heya, Danvers. You’re looking hot.”

“Thanks,” Alex said dryly. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Lucy smirked. “It’s so good to see you too, Alex, I’ve missed you.”

Alex rolled her eyes.

“For the record, your sister invited me.”

Kara’s eyes widened and she threw Alex an apologetic look.

“Sorry, guess I forgot to mention that.”

“You think?” Alex groaned.

“Oh come on, Danvers!” Lucy exclaimed. “It’s been ages! I’ve missed you!”

“Uh-huh,” Alex said unimpressed.

“Yeah, I did!” Lucy said. “I heard you made it to director.”

“Heard you made it in the military.”

“Heard you into girls now.”

Alex shot Kara an angry glare.

Lucy laughed, and walked over to Alex.

“It’s good to see you, Alex,” she hugged her.

Alex groaned over-exaggeratedly, but hugged Lucy back, and Kara swore she spotted a slight smile on Alex’ face.

Lucy walked over to Kara.

“Hi babe,” she greeted Kara, planting a big red kiss on her cheek. “You’re looking smokin’ as always.”

“Lucy,” Kara laughed, “you saw me two hours ago.”

“Wait,” Andrea frowned. “What do you mean two hours ago? I thought you stayed at home.”

“Oh,” Kara said, “I did. But Lucy spent the night. We had a sleepover since – ”

“I’m technically homeless,” Lucy finished for her. “I had to give up my apartment when I left town. It was either this or a hotel room.”

“And I never would have made you miss out on a homemade meal!”

“You really hate her that much?” Alex piped up, which earned her a painful elbow in her side.

“How nice,” Andrea said, but her voice had taken on that same icy quality it had the night before. “A sleepover.”

Kara had a feeling she’d be hearing about that later.

“Wait,” Lucy said, eying Lena. “Who are you? I haven’t seen you here before. I mean, I definitely would have remembered,” she added, her voice taking on a flirty tone.

Seeing Lucy bat her eyes at Lena momentarily distracted Kara from Andrea’s weird behaviour for a second.

“I’m – ”

“ – that’s Lena, my best friend,” Kara said quickly.

Lucy looked amused.

“Oh!” she remarked. “ _The_ best friend, I presume?”

“Yeah,” Kara said, eyes flying between the two brunettes. “My best friend.”

Lucy smiled.

“Isn’t that cute,” she said vaguely, almost distracted.

“Kara,” Andrea called.

Kara looked over, and saw Andrea pat the spot on the couch beside her.

Kara almost moaned sadly at the thought of having to leave the comfortable spot between Lena and Alex, but even more so because that meant that Lucy would get to sit there. Next to Lena. Next to _her_ Lena.

Kara shook her head.

She couldn’t believe the thoughts popping up in her head again. She had to stop thinking of Lena as hers. That’s what got all of those crazy thoughts into her head in the first place. She couldn’t think about that now. She couldn’t think of the fact that Lena’s body was so warm and so close, and that she smelled so good, and that Lena’s hand rested on the small of her back, and –

“Coming!” Kara said, pushing herself up.

She saw a flash of something like hurt on Lena’s face, and she wanted to turn back, apologise, tell her she had to do it because she would make Andrea mad if she didn’t, but she couldn’t.

So she walked to the other couch, and let Andrea tug her down, and pull her close.

Kara watched with a pained expression how Lucy sat down next to Lena and immediately struck up a conversation with her.

Kara cast her eyes down when Andrea kissed her temple.

She didn’t understand anything anymore.

* * *

Two hours later they were all sitting around Kara’s kitchen table, playing poker.

The booze had started flowing, and the tension had slowly seeped out of the room, leaving everybody just happy and tipsy enough to play games, and laugh their asses off.

Though now, after everybody had tapped out one by one – some more begrudgingly than others – Lena and Andrea were the last ones to play.

Lena had enjoyed herself well enough that evening. At least, she definitely had before Andrea had arrived. She enjoyed herself enough after, Lucy was a very fun and animate person to talk to, but Andrea’s presence had definitely cast a shadow over her night.

It wasn’t that Andrea was very unpleasant, on the contrary. She knew exactly how to talk to people, how to put on her happy voice and entice people with her exorbitant stories.

She’d done that for as long as Lena could remember.

It was a coveted skill that her own mother Lillian had tried to drill in her, but something she despised doing. It consisted of talking to people, asking them questions as if they were the most interesting people alive. It required training, impeccable manners and facial expressions, but above all, it required a certain amount of doe-eyed attention that Lena just couldn’t muster up unless it was absolutely necessary. 

Sure this quality came in handy when she had to entertain various businessmen and women, but it made her feel so fake and awkward, that by the end of such a convention or meeting, she’d feel completely drained.

The problem Andrea presented, Lena thought, was that all of her interactions were drenched in that fake ‘love me’ kind of way. She talked to people, she asked questions, she seemed to be interested… but Lena could tell that none of it was truly genuine.

She often wondered whether Andrea was different with Kara.

She spotted them, sometimes. The both of them, cuddled together on the couch, whispering to each other with big smiles on their faces while the others were wrapped up in their own conversations. They seemed genuine enough with each other.

It wasn’t like Lena was trying to stalk them. It was just that she was automatically drawn to Kara, in every room, and in every scenario.

She couldn’t help it if during a conversation her gaze wandered and landed on Kara’s beautiful face.

She loved her.

She loved Kara more than anybody else in the whole world, and that made it impossibly hard to look at her and Andrea, but at the same time, made it impossible to look away.

Sometimes Andrea would kiss Kara. She would lean in and connect their lips in a way that made Lena want to gauge her own eyeballs out.

Yet at the same time, she couldn’t look away, because the sight of Kara kissing someone else rattled up forbidden thoughts and fantasies, and the age-old question –

_What would it be like if I kissed her?_

It didn’t do well to dwell on fantasies, Lena had always decided.

Wishing her mother would come and take her away from the cold Luthor household. Wishing Reign was just another alien, and her best friend was just suffering from caffeine withdrawal. Wishing Kara was just Kara, and not the Supergirl who had hurt and accused her.

Yet in some wave of masochism, Lena couldn’t stop herself.

She loved Kara. And if she could only have her in the deepest, forbidden cavities of her mind, then so be it. She couldn’t deny herself those small moments of peace and happiness.

Even if they were slowly driving her insane.

Tonight though, throughout the party and all the little laughs and conversations, Lena noticed something. She noted that while Kara usually shone in Andrea’s presence, her smiles were now a little dimmer, a little smaller.

She was almost hidden under Andrea’s possessive arm over her shoulder, so her face only peaked out just a little.

A damn tragedy, because Kara’s face should always, _always_ be visible. Put on display, really.

Andrea, who Lena usually just tried to ignore, was making Kara uncomfortable. Lena was sure of it. She just didn’t know why, or what had happened.

But it sure pissed her off.

So much so, that in every single game they’d played; from Jenga – which Sam and Alex had won – to Monopoly – her and Lucy had truly wiped the board with all of them – she had tried to obliterate Andrea. And while boardgames played in teams were cute and all that, this, poker, was her terrain.

It was the real deal, and Andrea knew that too.

Whether she’d noticed Lena’s increased competitivity or not, once the poker set had been put on the table, she’d smirked, and directly made eye contact with Lena. Her only true competitor surely.

And it was working.

Everybody else had been played out. Lucy was scowling, Sam was consoling Alex with a drink and a hug – although Alex really didn’t seem to be all that put out from losing, especially not after that hug which had left her with red hot cheeks, Lena noticed with a smirk. She figured she’d keep that one to herself. Sam looked really happy, anyway.

But her and Andrea. That, that was serious.

They both had chips to spare, and their cards had just been dealt.

Andrea took a look at her cards, and a shadow of a smile passed over her lips.

Lena bit her tongue.

She hated Andrea’s little way of looking at her cards. Andrea had a tell – several, in fact – but none of them meant the same thing in every game. Sometimes her lip would curl upwards and she’d have bad cards. Other times, that exact same curl would mean she had a full house and had won the game.

It was infuriating.

But this time though, this time, Lena’s cards were good. Great, even. If Andrea didn’t have a straight flush or higher, Lena would beat her.

She got some grim satisfaction knowing she’d win from Andrea. She would have pegged that woman down a notch, even if it was at a petty card game.

She could ponder on her petty deeds later.

“So Lena,” Andrea spoke up.

Lena’s eyes darted up.

She arched an eyebrow. “What?”

“Want to make this more interesting?” Andrea drawled.

From the corner of her eye, Lena could see Kara frown.

“What are you suggesting?”

“I’m suggesting,” she said, toying with some of the blue tokens with her dexterous fingers, “we up the value of the game a little. After all,” she motioned at their friends, sulking around the table, suddenly a whole lot more interested in the rest of the game. “We are now in the unique position to raise the stakes, so to speak.”

She grinned with her perfect white teeth, and Lena had to force herself to smile back politely instead of throwing those chips in her face.

“Name your price, Andrea,” Lena said, tired of playing around. “You’ve clearly got something in mind,” she said cuttingly.

She felt Kara’s eyes on her, but she couldn’t look over at her right then.

Andrea didn’t look offended. Instead, she grinned.

“Two million dollars,” she said.

“What?!”

“No way!”

“Rich people,” Alex muttered, shaking her head.

“You’re kidding,” Lena stated.

“Andrea!” Kara gasped. “T-that’s – w-what, I mean – that’s insane!” she spluttered.

Andrea didn’t look at her girlfriend. She kept her eyes trained on Lena.

“Unless that’s too much for you?” she asked innocently.

Lena clenched her jaw.

“Let’s do it,” she said.

“Lena!” Kara interrupted. “That’s insane! This is insane! This isn’t – we play for food! Gummy bears!” she spluttered. “Drinks at the bar at the most! This – this… This is not what game night is about!”

Well, she was right about that.

“Kara – ”

“Baby, she knows what’s she’s doing,” Andrea cut her off, and Lena almost snarled. Leave it to Andrea to always want the final say. “She’s an adult. She’ll be fine.”

Kara didn’t seem all that convinced. She looked worriedly at the table, where chips were now uselessly discarded all over the table.

“This is insane,” she muttered. “Completely crazy.”

“Lena, you’re not actually considering this?” Sam asked.

“Why not?” Lena said defiantly. “I can afford it.”

Kara shook her head.

“Whatever,” she muttered, walking to the kitchen to get another drink. There, Lucy opened her arms to let Kara lean back against her with folded arms.

“Don’t worry, babe” Lena heard Lucy whisper. “If this is really what they want to do with their money, let them.”

“It’s insane,” Kara replied. “And it’s the exact opposite of what game night should be.”

Lena felt a pang of guilt in her chest at the knowledge that she was ruining game night for Kara over some petty grievance. She had half a mind to forfeit the game, just to see Kara shoot her a relieved smile and a grateful mouthed ‘thank you.’

But Andrea had picked up her cards again, and was smirking at her as if she was truly expecting Lena to crawl back.

She arched an eyebrow, with a low: “You ready?”

Lena couldn’t back down then.

“Oh always,” she replied sweetly.

“Okay,” Andrea said.

She took out a piece of paper, and wrote down a neatly curled ‘$2 million.’ She passed the note to Lena with a smirk. Lena resisted the urge to roll her eyes, and wrote down the number as well.

Andrea seemed very confident. While the money was basically pocket change to Lena, it didn’t mean she wanted to lose. But Andrea had been the one to raise the stakes. Was she bluffing? Did she have some sort of royal flush?

“Babe,” Andrea said, cutting through Lena’s internal musings.

She looked up to see Andrea stare at her with a weirdly vague smile.

Kara walked over, a little confused. Andrea waited for the final second to turn her eyes away from Lena and to her girlfriend.

“Wish me luck?” she asked sweetly.

Kara looked puzzled, but smiled carefully, nonetheless.

“Good luck,” she said, kissing Andrea’s cheek.

“Alright,” Sam said, “show your hands.”

Lena turned her cards over and spread them on the table with no small amount of satisfaction.

The laid-out cards consisted of two queens and a joker.

Lena completed them with her own two queens.

Four of a kind.

She heard gasps rise up from the room, and a sort of strangled sound that came directly from Kara’s throat.

She quickly glued her eyes to Andrea’s cards. And glanced again, because she couldn’t believe her eyes.

A four of spades, and a two of clubs.

She had no pair, no matches, no nothing.

Andrea had absolutely nothing.

Lena raised her head with inexplicable glee. She’d won! She’d won in a landslide, Andrea had nothing, she had everything and –

Andrea was looking at her with a smug smile on her face.

“Congratulations,” she smiled. “I guess you won.”

“Yes,” Lena said slowly. “I did.”

Andrea laughed and stood up, pulling Kara in her embrace.

“Are you okay, Andy?” Kara asked concerned. “That’s a lot of money.”

“It’s okay, baby,” Andrea said, keeping her eyes trained on Lena. “I bet you can make me feel better later.”

Lena felt the blood drain from her face.

Andrea’s hand slipped from Kara’s shoulders to her lower back. She kissed Kara’s temple, before letting her lips trail to the woman’s lips.

Lena couldn’t look away, but she felt nausea, hatred and deep pain bubble up inside.

Andrea knew.

Lena didn’t know how, but Andrea had found out – or had at the very least figured out – that Lena had feelings for Kara.

Maybe she felt threatened. Maybe this was all just a powerplay to show her who Kara really belonged to. Maybe she wasn’t secure enough in thinking Kara would stay with her. Whatever it was, it had made her want to throw away two million dollars, just to shove it in Lena’s face.

She wanted to show that she could do whatever the hell she wanted, even lose two million dollars to Lena, and still win. Because at the end of the day, she was dating Kara, and Lena was still very much alone.

And Andrea was revelling in that feeling.

Once Andrea broke away, leaving Kara a blubbering, blushing mess, she looked at Lena again.

“I’ll write you a check in the morning,” she said dismissively. “Maybe you can buy yourself a new dress.”

“Don’t bother,” Lena balked, standing up to. “I don’t need your pocket change. When I win, I want there to be actual stakes. This,” she sneered, “this was child’s play.”

Maybe the iciness of the situation had finally reached Kara, because she jumped away from Andrea and laughed nervously.

“Well hey,” she said eagerly, “you at least deserve some sort of prize! Let me get you a winner’s drink!”

She looked so hopeful and so desperate to keep the peace, that Lena just couldn’t refuse. Besides, the jealous look on Andrea’s face when Kara presented Lena with a glass of whiskey and a big smile was at least a small victory.

“So now that the rich ladies have had their fun,” Lucy suddenly spoke up. “Kara here promised me a real party.”

Kara looked around confused.

“There’s alcohol. That’s usually our version of a party.”

Lucy groaned. “No Kara! We’re hot, we’re young! We should be out partying in clubs!”

Kara suddenly looked a whole lot less enthusiastic and a whole lot paler.

“Clubs?” she asked hoarsely.

“Yes!” Lucy exclaimed. “Parties, dancing, drinking, making out with hot people!”

She took Kara’s hands in hers and pouted.

“Please, Kara? I got all dressed up, and I just got back and I’m just aching to see how many drinks this dress’ll get me. Please,” she pleaded, “I need my friend to go with me, please? I’ll make sure you have a great time?”

Kara looked around uncomfortably while Lucy kept up her constant pleading, until she finally gave in.

“Fine,” she conceded, “I’ll go with you. If,” she checked with Andrea, “if that’s okay?”

Andrea didn’t look happy at all.

“Actually, babe, I’d feel more comfortable if you stayed in. It’s already late after all. And I thought you’d be spending the night again?”

“Oh,” Kara said, “well, since Lucy’s staying over, we’re having a sort of sleepover? So I think I’ll be staying here tonight,” Kara smiled tentatively.

Andrea’s smile tightened.

“Well then why are you asking me when you’ve clearly already made up your mind?” Andrea all but sneered.

Kara looked really taken aback.

“Andrea – ”

“What’s the matter?” Lucy piped up, and Andrea looked ready to strangle her. “Kara and I are just going dancing. What’s the harm in having a little fun? I promise I’ll look after your girlfriend?”

Lucy’s faux innocence and batting eyelashes seemed to have some sort of effect on Andrea.

She looked around to see that everyone was staring at her. Sam seemed guarded, ready to intervene if things escalated between Andrea and Kara, while Nia’s eyes were flitting between the two girlfriends.

Alex as always seemed to ready to grab a knife and attack before anything could escalate.

Seemingly realising she had been driven in a corner, Andrea shook her head.

“Fine,” she said, “I’m going home then. I’ve still got so much work to do – ”

Lena rolled her eyes.

“ – I’ll see you tomorrow, my darling?”

Kara smiled, relieved.

“Yes, see you tomorrow.”

They kissed, and this time, Lena looked away.

“You’ll look after her?” Andrea checked jovially with Lucy.

“You betcha!” Lucy beamed.

Apparently, it was definitely a ruse to get Andrea to leave her alone, because once the door closed behind Andrea, Kara burst out laughing.

“You betcha? You’ll look after me? Who are you and what have you done with Lucy Lane?”

Lucy laughed. “Well, I had to convince her, didn’t I? Be glad you finally saw my lawyer skills at work.”

“Your lawyer skills taught you how to manipulate my girlfriend into letting us go clubbing?”

“Yes. Now go get changed. We need to make an impression when we get there.”

Kara sighed, but walked to her bedroom.

Lena’s eyes met Kara’s and she shot her a quick smile, which Kara answered with one of her own. She looked tired though. Caught off guard by Andrea’s behaviour.

Maybe Kara knew that Andrea had overstepped tonight, that she had marked her territory like some sort of dog. Maybe she knew, or maybe she thought it was just normal.

Lena shook her head, and went to get another drink.

* * *

“Okay,” Kara walked out of her bedroom. “I think I’m ready.”

Lena turned around and almost sprayed her drink all over the couch.

Kara was wearing a sinfully short strapless black dress. So short, even, that she kept tugging on the hem, trying to get it to cover just a sliver more skin on her thighs.

She looked extremely uncomfortable.

And Goddamn drop-dead gorgeous.

“Kara!” Lucy exclaimed. “You look hot!”

Kara blushed a fiery red.

“Thanks Luce,” she muttered.

“I’m serious! If you weren’t dating that uptight CEO you’d have to pry me off you with a crowbar.”

Lena scowled.

“Thanks for that, Luce. Really.”

Lucy nodded solemnly, as if she’d just bestowed a huge favour upon the room.

Kara coughed awkwardly, looking around the room.

“So’s everyone ready to go?”

“Actually, Kar, we’re going to be staying here,” Alex said. “I’m not feeling much in the way of dancing.”

Kara sulked. “But Alex?”

“Another time, Kara, I promise.”

Kara sighed, but seemed to accept her fate.

“So you guys’ll be staying with her then?” she asked.

“No, I’m coming with you two,” Nia piped up. “I’m not missing a chance to see Kara Danvers dance!”

Kara shot her a glare.

“Great!” Lucy exclaimed.

“We’re just going to empty out your liquor shelf,” Sam said toasting her glass.

Kara rolled her eyes, but laughed anyway.

“Well we’ll probably be home soon – ”

“No we won’t!”

“ – so I’ll probably see you guys later.”

“No you won’t!”

Kara sighed.

“Just go, Kar! Have fun! Let loose!”

Kara shot Lena an exasperated smile, but Lena just laughed.

“Be careful, have fun,” Lena smiled.

Kara nodded before allowing an already dancing Lucy to tug her out the door.

* * *

Alex was drunk.

Again.

Honestly, at this stage in her life, Lena had seen Alex drunk often enough not to be fazed by it. Except, apparently after a break-up, Alex was a sad drunk. A very sad drunk.

It had all started out fine.

They were just lounging about, drinking fancy scotch, laughing at the idea of Kara dancing awkwardly at a club, before moving on to discuss what had happened at the D.E.O.

“Wait,” Sam had laughed, “you’re really trying to put your mother and Cat freaking Grant in a room together for an honest to God D.E.O. mission?”

“Yep. As soon as we convince Cat to come back, the mission is a go.”

They had laughed and joked, and had just genuinely had a good time.

But around Alex’ third scotch, she became a lot quieter. She didn’t join in in the conversation as much anymore, and she seemed to be in a more contemplative mood.

“Alex,” Sam spoke up. “Alex.”

Alex looked at Sam, startled.

“What?” she asked, a little dazed.

“I was asking you how you think the whole mission with Lillian and Cat is going to go. It’s gotta be hilarious, right?”

“Right,” Alex smiled a tiny smile. “Hilarious.”

“I can’t imagine a world in which Cat Grant chooses to spy on a party. Have you even gotten in contact with her yet?”

Alex didn’t answer.

“Alex!” Lena asked, a tad irritated. “Are you even listening?”

“Huh?” Alex looked at Lena as if she’d never seen the woman before. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Alex, are you okay?” Sam asked concerned.

Alex blinked at her, slowly. Like the words Sam was uttering were too difficult, and too far away.

“Alex?”

“Kelly took her stuff,” Alex whispered. “She left her key, and – and took her stuff. I guess she really wanted to be rid of me.”

Then she promptly burst out into tears.

“Oh God,” Lena uttered.

“Oh God,” Sam whispered softly.

“She’s really gone,” Alex cried.

Seeing the big, strong director Danvers bawl her eyes out in a drunken episode was not something Lena ever wanted to see in her life. But here they were.

Luckily, Sam did all the consoling. She held Alex tightly, and brushed her hair out of her face, and told her things would be okay, all the while Alex was clinging to her like a koala.

For adopted sisters, Alex and Kara really did sometimes act completely alike.

“I just can’t believe she – she just left,” Alex cried. “Like it was nothing.”

“Oh honey,” Sam hugged Alex close.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Lena suggested, trying to be helpful.

Alex had taken her up on that offer.

For more than half an hour, Alex sobbed in Sam’s arms, piecing together the story of how Kelly and she had gotten into more fights, and more meaningless spats, and how it had slowly sucked the life and love out of their relationship.

Apparently, Alex thought Kelly didn’t get that she had to work so much to defend National City.

Kelly apparently got jealous of everyone Alex was around – including Supergirl! Alex didn’t make time for her, but she did for her friends, which Kelly didn’t really like. And Alex hadn’t been attentive according to Kelly, and had forgotten how to be romantic in the last months.

It had been a long time coming, but that didn’t make it any easier for Alex, who seemed to think she was the worst girlfriend to ever walk the earth.

Eventually, she tired herself out, and leaned heavily against Sam’s shoulder, who kept at it, whispering sweet nothings in Alex’ ear. She hiccoughed sadly from time to time, but the heaviest crying had subsided.

She looked immensely sad though, and Lena felt for her. Kelly was a good person, a kind person. A loving girlfriend. After everything that had gone down between Alex and Maggie, Lena was secretly happy for her friend that she found someone so emotionally healthy and mature. Someone she could grow with.

“I think she’s really gone,” Alex mumbled, and Sam stroked her hair.

“It’s going to be okay, baby,” Sam said. “The hurt’ll go away soon.”

Alex nodded slowly, and yawned, making no indication she was going to move away from Sam any time soon.

When it finally did seem like Alex was succumbing to her alcohol induced slumber, and Lena and Sam felt too awkward to talk when Alex was basically on the verge of falling asleep, they decided to call it a night.

“Okay,” Sam said after a while, “I’m going to take her home.”

“Sounds good.”

“No, I’m going to take her to my home.”

“Sam – ”

“She’s sad, drunk and lonely, Lena. I can’t just leave her alone. Besides,” Sam blushed a bit, “she’s slept over before. It’s no big deal.”

Lena didn’t think that last part was completely true, but she wasn’t sure Sam was really lying to her, or lying to herself.

“Okay,” she said, holding up her hands, “you do what you think is best.”

“Thank you,” Sam said.

All three of them got their coats – Alex with a little more help from Sam because she kept falling back on the couch – and put the dishes in Kara’s sink. Lena made a silent promise to return the very next morning and help Kara with the clean-up.

Just when they were about to head out though, loud laughter and thudding footsteps echoed through the hall.

Lena had a sneaking suspicion of who she’d find when they opened the door, but nothing could’ve prepared her for the sight.

She’d swung the door open to find a drunk and haggard looking Lucy Lane, heels in one hand, lipstick smudged, but most importantly, supporting a very, _very_ drunk looking Kara. The latter’s glasses were askew on her nose, her dress had clearly been pulled down a little too much, revealing the lacy top of her bra, and she was somehow missing one shoe which must’ve been hilarious to her, as she was giggling a lot.

“What in the name – ”

“Oh good!” Lucy said. “You’re here!”

“Lucy, what – ”

“There’s a really hot Brazilian guy waiting for me downstairs,” Lucy rushed. “Nia went home about an hour ago – and texted, she really did arrive. I just had to get sloppy drunk here home so you guys could watch her.”

“Lucy, I – ”

Lena didn’t have time to finish her own sentence when Kara’s warm, sweaty body was basically dumped in her arms. Lucy quickly took out her buzzing phone.

“Lena!” Kara mumbled excitedly, wrapping her arms around Lena’s neck. Her eyes were half-closed, and Lena could just barely classify the woman as conscious. “You’re here too!”

Lena was momentarily struck speechless at the sight of her drunken best friend, smiling in the crook of her neck. Then she remembered whose fault that was, and turned to Lucy with a stormy expression.

“Explain,” she threatened.

Lucy didn’t seem at all worried. In fact, she seemed more concerned with whomever was trying to give her a call. Typing out a text message, she quickly informed Lena of what had happened.

“She had a lot of alien alcohol. But the bartender said she’d be okay so long as she drinks a lot of water,” Lucy rattled. “We went dancing, she had some shots, then some mixer or a cocktail – I can’t remember. But anyway, she had a great time, you just have to make sure she doesn’t get sick. That should be all. Gotta go, good luck!”

Lucy had already turned around and ran into the hallway before she’d even finished her trail of thought.

“Lucy!” Lena hissed.

“She’ll be fine, just have Alex look after her. Hot Brazilian guy, gotta go bye!”

Lucy turned the corner, giggling an ‘I’m coming, Paolo,’ into her phone.

“Use protection!” Sam called after her.

They heard Lucy yell something that vaguely sounded as a “duh.”

“Alright,” Sam turned to Lena. “I’m going to run downstairs, make sure this guy is legit and then take Alex home. Can you take care of Kara?”

Kara made a happy sound in Lena’s neck, which blew some warm air right onto a sensitive part of Lena’s skin.

She almost wanted to squirm away from the heat that was suddenly all over her.

“I don’t know,” Lena said worriedly. “I’m not – maybe you should – ”

“Lena,” Sam admonished, “I have to take care of Alex, get her home, make sure Lucy isn’t going home with a murderer or a rapist, and I have to make sure the babysitter gets home on time. Can you please woman up and look after _your_ best friend?”

Lena shuffled on her feet at the animadversion.

“Okay,” she muttered.

Sam let out a relieved sigh.

“Okay,” she said slowly. “Thank you. You’ve got this.”

Lena moved aside with Kara, so Sam could pass with the other drunk Danvers sister. They didn’t even register passing each other by.

They exchange hurried goodbyes, before Lena closed the door. She heard Sam call out for Lucy to wait up.

Lena looked at the smiling woman in her arms and sighed.

She hoped Kara was an easy drunk.

She wasn’t.

After various attempts to get Kara to clean herself up and go to bed, Kara only seemed to become more lucid, and more awake.

“Lena it was so funnn,” she drawled. “We went dancing, and the music was great, and the club was just great, and the people were just amazing, and, oh my Rao, it was just so great!”

She danced around the room in some demonstration, while Lena followed her, trying to pick up all the various items Kara had dropped.

“Yes, Kara,” Lena said exasperatedly, “that’s great. Now can you please take off that dress and get in your pyjama’s?”

But Kara wasn’t listening.

“It was so fun! Did you know dancing was so much fun?”

Lena dropped her head in exasperation, but smiled nonetheless.

“Yes, Kara,” she said, “I know dancing in clubs is fun.”

“I didn’t!” Kara exclaimed. “I never go! I’ve been missing out!”

Lena rubbed her brow. “Uh-huh.”

“And the drinks,” Kara gasped. “They were amazing, and sweet! And they made my head feel like cotton, feel!”

She tugged on Lena’s hand so it touched her hair.

“See?” Kara beamed. “It feels cotton-y. And when I go like this – ”

She swung her head from the left to the right.

“ – then the world goes spinning! It’s in-sane!”

Lena laughed despite herself. Kara was a handful as a drunk, but at least she was a cute drunk.

“And then, and then, Lena, some guys wanted to dance with me, but Lucy scared them all away,” she giggled. “I think one of them gave me his number though.”

She held up her arm for closer inspection, and to Lena’s vexation, she saw that Kara’s arms were decorated with unintelligible numbers, written in permanent marker.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” she deadpanned, before shaking her head.

“Alright,” she said to her prancing friend, “new plan. Take off that dress, get in the shower before your girlfriend finds out you were hit on by a bunch of guys, then pyjama’s.”

Something she said must’ve finally stuck, because Kara came to a standstill. She held up her arms in front of her.

“Kara?” Lena asked.

“D’you think she’ll be mad?” Kara was slurring her speech slightly.

“Who, Andrea?” Lena asked, folding Kara’s jacket over the couch. “Who knows with that woman.”

That had been the wrong thing to say, because when she looked up, Kara was looking at her with her big, hurt doe eyes.

“She’ll be mad at me?” Kara whimpered, jutting out her trembling bottom lip.

“No, no, honey,” Lena realised her mistake, and rushed to say, “she won’t be mad. She’ll be happy you got home safe and sound, okay?”

“Are you sure?” Kara asked, her eyes dreadfully close to watering up.

“Yes, yes,” Lena assured, “she’ll be so relieved to know you’re okay. Do you want me to call her to come over?”

“No ‘s okay. She won’t – I don’t – M’good.”

Lena was surprised at the rejection Kara showed, but didn’t mention it. Maybe she didn’t want Andrea to see her like that.

“How about we text her then, okay? Tell her you got home okay?”

“M’I guess,” Kara said.

Lena had apparently reassured her enough for her to be distracted by something else again.

“Where’s your phone, Kara?”

Kara shrugged and started dancing again.

Lena sighed and sank to her knees to dig through the contents of the bag Kara had carelessly dropped to the floor.

Nail polish, reporter’s pad – _why even?_ – lipstick, shoe – _there it was_ – keys, phone!

Lena unlocked Kara’s phone – _1, 2, 3, 4? C’mon Kara_ – and it showed her one new text message. From Andrea.

And while Lena felt guilty about it, as she was usually a strong defender of privacy and space, she couldn’t help but look at the brief text.

I’m sorry I was short with you earlier.  
Please forgive me.  
I love you  
\- Andrea

Lena felt sick, and wanted to throw the phone against the wall.

Is this how it usually went between Kara and Andrea? Andrea messed up, and one apologetic text later, Kara came rushing back to her?

It was disgusting.

Lena kept herself from looking at the previous texts, and instead shot a short text back.

It’s Lena. Kara just came home.  
She’s pretty drunk so I’m helping her out.  
Thought you’d want to know.

She hesitated a couple more seconds before just hitting send. She didn’t give a crap what Andrea thought about her text writing style anyway.

“Okay,” Lena said, putting the phone on the kitchen counter. “Time to get ready for bed, Kara.”

“No,” Kara protested, “wanna dance!”

She swung her hips wildly and put her decorated arms up like she was still in the club.

“I can still hear the music, Lena! It’s amazing! Dance with me.”

“Kara,” Lena started, but she didn’t have time to finish her sentence before Kara tugged on her arm and pulled her with her.

“Dance, Lena!” she pleaded. “Please?”

Well it’s not like Lena had ever been able to refuse Kara anything.

She felt ridiculous, moving around awkwardly to some non-existent music, but the absolute adoration and joy on Kara’s face made all of it worth it.

“Yay, Lena!” she exclaimed and started dancing around wildly.

Lena couldn’t help but laugh when Kara started to sing along.

_“It ain't my fault that I'm out here gettin' loose - gotta blame it on the booze – gotta blame it on my juice, baby – It ain’t my fault - ”_

Her singing was accompanied with a high jumping, that quickly put her out of breath. Kara seemed to be tiring herself out. After a while, the singing turned into rhythmic mumbling, and then into some loud breathing.

Kara’s eyes were half closed, and her dancing was now more leaning on Lena than anything else.

“Okay,” Lena murmured after Kara’s dancing had been limited to softly swaying on her feet with her head on Lena’s shoulder. “Let’s get you out of that dress and into something comfy, alright.”

Kara hummed in response.

Lena carefully turned Kara around and let hands trail over the back of Kara’s red dress, fumbling for the zipper.

It was a mean little thing. Too small and easily breakable. Lena tugged at it, and it wouldn’t go past the first inch. She swore and started tugging a little harder.

Kara didn’t move away, but she did turn her head a little bit.

“Are you trying to have sex with me?” she asked softly.

“What?! Good God, no!” Lena exclaimed horrified, letting go of the dress immediately and stepping away. “Kara, no, I would never, ever take advantage of you like that. Ever. God!”

She clasped a hand over her own forehead.

“I’m sorry,” Kara whispered. “Didn’t mean to upset you. I was just wonderin’s all.”

“How – why – why were you wondering about that, Kara? Did I do something to make you uncomfortable?”

Kara turned around with big eyes.

“No, Lena. ‘s Just that Andy always wants to have sex with me when she’s tugging on my zipper.”

Lena’s stomach turned.

“I see,” she said. “Well I’m not Andy. I wasn’t trying to have sex with you.”

“Yeah,” Kara said, “you’re not like her.”

“No, I’m not,” Lena muttered. “Can you take off your dress now?”

Kara obliged, and with some help from Lena, she finally shimmied out of the thing. Lena did her absolute best not to take one peep at her friend’s body, and helped her put on her pajama’s solely by looking up. Kara was finally semi-ready for bed.

Lena went into the bathroom to get a washcloth with some make-up remover, and when she returned, Kara had flopped down on the couch.

Lena walked over, and sank to her knees before her. Kara put her arms forward, so Lena could easily clean them.

“I don’t think she likes you very much,” Kara said in a burst of honesty.

“Who, Andrea?”

Kara nodded.

“Yeah, I think you might be on to something there,” Lena mumbled, continuing her work.

“I don’t get it,” Kara whispered. “You’re my best friend, and she’s my girlfriend, and I don’t understand why she doesn’t think you’re the greatest, bestest person ever! Cause you are! The bestest!”

Lena smiled. “It’s okay, Kara. She doesn’t have to love me.”

“But I love you,” Kara said. “So I want her to like you. It makes me sad.”

Lena stilled.

She didn’t want to make Kara sad. That was awful. She couldn’t do that to her Kara.

“Well, if it means that much to you, honey, I’ll talk to her, okay? I’ll do better, I promise.”

“Okay,” Kara said, head lolling to the side so she could look outside her window, seemingly having already moved on in her mind.

Kara had finally calmed down. She didn’t talk anymore. She didn’t sing, or dance. Were it not for the fact that when Lena looked up, Kara’s eyes were trained on her, she would’ve thought Kara had been asleep. The alcohol mixed with the party must’ve caused some real excitement, that had finally died down with the new, calm environment. She wasn’t exactly sober yet, but at least the crazy, wild stage of her drunkenness was over.

“All done,” Lena concluded, standing up and depositing the dirty washcloth in the hamper. “You might need to do another take tomorrow, but it’s almost gone.”

“Lena?” Kara called over from on the couch.

Lena walked back. “Yeah?”

Kara looked a little embarrassed, like she couldn’t meet Lena’s eyes.

“Can you stay for a bit? Please?”

“Oh, actually, I have to head home. I still have some work – ”

“Oh, no, yeah sure. Forget I asked,” Kara said quickly.

Lena’s heart hurt at the sound.

She had her mind and heart fight each other on the issue for precisely six seconds before she said: “Well, it can’t hurt to stay a little longer.”

Kara beamed, and scooted back just a little so Lena could sit down. Once she had, Kara placed a pillow on Lena’s lap, and laid her head down on said lap.

Lena stiffened.

She shouldn’t do this. Andrea would already be furious that she’d stayed over, she would definitely hate this.

But then Kara started to brabble.

“There was a bird outside and it looked really freaky,” she mumbled.

And Lena decided she couldn’t go even if she wanted to.

“Really? How was it freaky.”

“It looked at me weird. Judging me, you know?”

“The bird was freaky cause it looked at you weird?”

“Well all birds are freaky,” Kara decided. “But this one was real nasty.”

Lena chuckled. “Why are all birds freaky?”

“Well we didn’t have birds on Krypton,” Kara said, playing with some strands of her hair. “So when I first saw them here on earth, I was terrified. Did you know they are actually descendants of real dinosaurs?”

The awe in her voice was so cute that Lena couldn’t help but smile and run her hand over Kara’s arm.

“I did know that. I suppose when you see them like that, they can be pretty freaky.”

“Right?!” Kara exclaimed. “The freakiest. Not dinosaurs though. Dinosaurs are cool. ‘Cept when I was like thirteen and Alex showed my Jurrasic Parc. Then I got really scared, and Eliza got like supes mad at Alex ‘cause she wasn’t s’pposed to show me stuff like that, ya know? Since I didn’t know back then that they were all dead!”

“Extinct,” Lena corrected.

“Yeah,” Kara agreed. “Really supes dead.”

Lena chuckled and let her hand rest on Kara’s arm. That was a bad decision, because Kara turned on her lap to look at her.

“No,” she whined, taking hold of the hand, “continue.”

Lena couldn’t deal with the adorableness of the situation.

A sober Kara was already a whole lot of cute in a whole lot of attractiveness. Kara being drunk didn’t exactly take her attractiveness away, but it made her even more pure. Even more adorable. So sweet and innocent, that Lena had a hard time reconciling the idea of this Kara with her Supergirl persona.

Lena was sure that if it came down to it, Kara would be ready to jump into her suit and go into attack mode in the blink of an eye. But right then and there, she was just an honest little drunk. A cute one at that too.

So Lena continued her stroking, and Kara made a sort of purring sound that completely overwhelmed all of Lena’s senses so much, it felt like her heart could burst. She didn’t think she could love Kara Danvers any more than she already did, but that girl on her lap proved her wrong once again.

“Andrea wants to have sex with me.”

Lena almost jumped up in surprise.

“W-what?”

“She wants to have sex with me,” Kara noted, staring out the window.

“I – I though… Never mind.”

Lena shook her head. It shouldn’t matter to her how far Kara and Andrea had gone. It was demeaning to Kara to even think about, to even ponder on the question for just a second.

She was Kara’s friend. She should help her out with any and all problems, and if her and Andrea’s (non-existent) sex life were part of that, then she would help her out there as well. Or at the very least, she would lend her an ear.

“And, ehm,” Lena cursed herself for her awkwardness. If it were her, she just knew Kara would be there, with blushing cheeks, but there nonetheless. Ready to listen, to help, and to do research if needed.

“You don’t want that?” Lena asked carefully.

“I don’t know,” Kara sighed.

Lena told herself to just act natural. Like it was any other friend.

“You shouldn’t do anything you’re not comfortable with, Kara,” she reminded her friend. “You shouldn’t ever feel pressured or pushed into anything.”

“I know,” Kara whispered. “It’s just that I think she’s getting frustrated of me always saying no.”

Lena tensed. “Is she pressuring you, Kara? Is she making you feel bad for not having sex?”

Kara seemed to think for a bit. “No, I don’t think so. She’s always nice about it. S’just that I think she’s not too happy. And I want to make her happy. She’s already not happy that I don’t wanna do sleepovers all the time.”

“Kara,” Lena said, momentarily shaking off the sudden news that Kara rarely slept over at Andrea’s. “Are you, ehm, uncomfortable with the idea of sex? Are you asexual? It’s completely fine if you are – ”

“I know it’s fine,” Kara said candidly, “but I’m not. Asexual. I like sex.”

“Oh,” Lena blushed. “That’s good I guess.”

She scraped her throat. “So then, ehm, what’s stopping you?”

Kara squirmed.

“Kara?”

“You’re going to think it’s stupid,” Kara said, the sound coming out slightly muffled since she hid behind a pillow.

Lena smiled. “I promise I won’t.”

Kara peaked out just a little to look up at Lena.

“What if I don’t like it?”

“Don’t like what?”

Kara blushed. “Having sex with women.”

“Oh.”

“I know it sounds bad,” Kara groaned. “But I just – what if it’s icky?”

“Icky?” Lena repeated slowly.

“You know!” Kara blushed. “The you know part?”

“Oh!” Lena blushed scarlet too.

“Ugh, I’m sorry, Lena!” Kara sulked. “I shouldn’t even be asking you this. You don’t even know about this stuff. I should ask Alex, but she always says she’s already given me my sex ed, and she shouldn’t have to suffer through it again.”

“Well that sounds like Alex,” Lena mumbled, before frowning as the rest of the words hit her. “Wait,” she paused, “why wouldn’t I know about this stuff?”

“Well because you like boys,” Kara said, as if it were the most evident thing in the world. “Ergo – ” she giggled, “that’s a funny word. Ergo,” she giggled. “But ergo, you don’t know.”

“Kara,” Lena said slowly. “I am not straight. I have slept with girls. A lot more than I have slept with boys.”

Kara turned around completely, so she was lying on her back, looking at Lena like she’d never seen her before.

“You like girls too?”

“Yes, Kara,” Lena smiled. “I’ve liked girls since before you dated a girl.”

“You have?”

Kara almost sounded undignified.

Lena nodded.

“What girls?” Kara pouted. “Nice girls?”

“Sometimes,” Lena said.

Kara frowned. “Smart girls.”

“Yes,” Lena said. “Some were very smart.”

“Pretty girls?”

“Very pretty girls,” Lena teased. “The prettiest.”

“Prettier than me?”

Lena laughed at Kara’s disappointed expression.

“No, Kara,” she smiled, leaning over Kara, so her jet-black hair fell over Kara’s eyes. “Not even close.”

Kara giggled. “Good.”

Lena smiled at Kara’s silliness.

The woman was playing with a strand of Lena’s hair that had fallen over her eyes. She started mindlessly braiding it, and Lena gladly let her do so. Her drunken fingers might not be very dexterous, and she might have left Lena with more knots and tangles than an actual braid, but Lena wouldn’t have it any other way. She liked it that way.

All of a sudden, something dawned on Kara. A sly smile spread over her face as she looked up at Lena.

“So you do know, about stuff.”

Damn it.

“What stuff?” she asked innocently.

Kara wasn’t fooled.

“The girl sex stuff.”

“I – yes,” Lena gave up. “Yes, I suppose I do.”

“So is it?”

“Is what what?”

“Is it icky, doing – _you know what_ – with a girl?”

“Kara, if you’re considering doing it, you might wanna think about being able to say it,” Lena teased.

Kara blushed to the tops of her ears, so much so that Lena felt a little sorry for teasing her.

“I’m just messing with you, Kara. And, no. No, I don’t think it’s icky at all. In fact, it’s rather wonderful.”

“Really?” Kara asked breathlessly.

“Yeah. It’s really nice.”

“Giving, and uhm, receiving?” Kara asked carefully. “And what if I taste gross?”

“What if you – Kara,” Lena frowned. “You’ve had sex before, right? With Mon-El and… others?”

“Well yeah,” Kara replied.

“So surely – I mean, did none of those people ever… eat you out?”

Kara squeaked at the wording.

“I – ehm, no, ehm, no,” Kara stuttered. “I mean I would, of course, ehm, do my part. But no, no never. Mon-El said it tasted weird, and that it was gross to do so.”

Just when Lena thought she couldn’t dislike that guy any more.

“Kara, it’s not gross!” she exclaimed. “And you’re definitely not gross! Goddamnit, is he the reason you think it might be icky? Or that you might be ‘icky?’”

Kara’s embarrassed flush more than answered her question.

Lena sighed.

“Look,” she said, starting out softer. She didn’t want to creep an already vulnerable Kara out by using a harsh tone. One wrong word and the woman might never sleep with anyone else ever again.

“Having sex with a girl is a wonderful experience. And it doesn’t just have to be that one thing, if that’s what you’re afraid of,” Lena explained. “There’s a lot of different ways to have sex with other girls, and all of them are equally rewarding. But you should only ever do what you feel is right, and what your partner feels is okay for them. But you shouldn’t start out with the idea that it is gross or ‘icky’ just because some boy who didn’t know how to please a lady said so.”

Kara went still for a moment.

“But what if I’m really bad at it, or I suck, and Andrea will be disappointed with me? What then? What if she breaks up with me?”

Lena would always contend that her following words were all partly due to the almost palpable anxiety in Kara’s voice, which really tipped Lena over the edge.

“Kara, sex with girls is nice, but having sex with a girl you like is…” Lena searched for the right thing to say. “It’s the most magical feeling on earth. Any girl who loves you would be so incredibly lucky to spend even a day by your side. Let alone spend the nights with you. You shouldn’t worry because, when you’re with the right person, sex can be fun, and loving, and nice. Anyone who doesn’t think that doesn’t deserve to spend even a second by your side.”

Kara became quiet.

“You really think that?” she asked after a while.

“I really do.”

“She won’t think I’m icky?”

“No one in a million years could think that having sex with you is icky,” Lena assured her.

Kara thought about it, and turned around, nuzzling Lena’s stomach. Lena almost jumped at the feeling of Kara’s hot breath so close to her core.

“Lena?”

“Yes, Kara?”

“I still don’t think I’m ready to have sex with Andrea, even if it’s not icky.”

Lena mindlessly ran her fingers through Kara’s hair.

“Then that’s okay too.”

“Thanks Lena,” Kara whispered. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”

Lena smiled sadly. “Me neither, Kara. Me neither.”

When Kara was on the brink of sleep, Lena had softly pulled her up, and led her into her bedroom. She’d tucked Kara in, who murmured a sweet: “Won’t you stay?”

Lena let out a shuddering breath.

“I don’t think Andrea’s going to like that, love.”

Kara made a sad sound. “Probably not. Y’r right. As usual.”

“It’s okay, Kara. I’ll fix it for you. Okay?”

Kara smiled, her eyes already fallen shut.

“Thanks Lena, you’re the best.”

Lena smiled sadly. “Good night, darling.”

She turned around to leave when she heard a soft: “G’dnight, Lena. I love you,” before Kara drifted off to sleep.

Lena resisted the urge to cry at the sudden longing she had to hear that sentence every night for the rest of her life.

She wanted to be the one who got to sleep next to Kara every single night. She wanted to be the one who got to wish Kara goodnight for the rest of her life. She was the one who wanted to tell Kara she was beautiful, and that she was worth the world, and that she was loved.

Instead Andrea got to be the lucky one.

Well, Lena thought with some grim satisfaction, at least she didn’t get to yet. Kara was not ready to take the next step, and that had to mean something.

She couldn’t fix her hopes on it, but it at least gave Lena a sliver of power. She was still the one Kara came to when she was drunk or sad.

And that had to be enough for now.

She finally came home around four in the morning, exhausted to the bone, and ready to sleep for years on end.

She ran her fingers through her hair in an attempt to brush it, and frowned when her fingers got caught in some sort of tangle. When she held it before her eyes to inspect it, she noticed it was a childish attempt at a braid.

Lena’s lip trembled at the sight. She removed her fingers from her hair, and didn’t make an attempt to get the knot/ braid out of her hair.

It was pretty anyway.

She walked to her bed, and plopped down on the mattress, falling asleep on her covers, still wearing the clothes she’d been wearing at Kara’s party.

She dreamed of Kara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys!!!
> 
> Just in time for the new Supergirl episode, and as a birthday present from me to you, (yay! International women's day birthday!!) I'm sending this new chapter into the world! I hope a whole lot of jealous Andrea managed to make the wait worth the while! Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed! Thank you so much for your enthusiasm, your love and your patience. I hope you liked this chapter! I had so much fun writing it! 
> 
> The comments on this fic really keep me going. They're so warm and sweet, and so much fun to read! It makes writing this story a genuine pleasure. So thank you all so much.
> 
> This chapter is dedicated to Batbutch916, What the What and Lagar for their support, as well as to Melody-fox, who proofread a part of this chapter when I was scared the quality of this fic was going down. Thank you all so much. 
> 
> Please let me know what you thought, either here or on [my Tumblr!](https://thingsanddreamsandstuff.tumblr.com)
> 
> If you have any sort of prompts you think I might like to write, please send me a message on Tumblr! I love writing fan fiction, and I can't wait to write some more :) 
> 
> See you next time!


	13. Chapter 13

Kara woke up the next day by the unbearably loud sound of incessant knocking on her front door.

Her head was throbbing in a way that it hadn’t for a long time, and the knocking really wasn’t helping. She dragged her body out of her bed and walked through her apartment.

“M’coming, m’coming,” she muttered, eyes still-half closed, fighting to stay awake.

The minute she turned her doorknob, the door was thrown open, and a furious looking Andrea barged into her apartment.

“Where is she?” she demanded, storming into Kara’s bedroom.

“What?” Kara asked confused, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

Andrea stormed back into the living room. “Where’s Luthor?”

“Lena?” Kara asked, completely befuddled by Andrea’s commotion. “What’d you need Lena for?”

“Don’t play dumb with me,” Andrea yelled, and Kara jumped back, eyes flying open.

The anger in Andrea’s face shook Kara awake completely, and despite having superpowers, she instinctively took a step back.

Andrea looked furious. Her skin was paler than usual, and her eyes were dark and threatening. Even her usually impeccably assembled suit seemed to have been thrown on rapidly and half-hazardly. The cuffs on her sleeves weren’t done, and her collar wasn’t straight. She’d tied her jacket the wrong way, and her heels were scuffed.

She looked like she’d run over to Kara’s apartment in a hurry, seconds after having woken up.

She looked very unlike Andrea. Though that also could’ve been the very uncharacteristic snarl on her face.

“Andrea – ”

“I know she was with you last night,” Andrea growled. “Don’t deny it.”

Kara thought back and vaguely remembered Lena coming over and talking to her on the couch. She pushed back the embarrassing details she didn’t want to remember right there and then.

“I mean, yeah, Lucy went home with some guy, so Lena stayed t – ”

“Did you fuck her?”

Kara felt like she’d been slapped in the face.

“W-what? No – Andrea, of course not!” she exclaimed horrified. “Where the – why would I – what the hell’s wrong with you?”

Andrea took a step closer to Kara, who instinctively leaned back.

“Don’t do that. Don’t gaslight me. Don’t act like I’m the fool. I know what’s been going on. She taunted me about it.”

“What?” Kara asked. “That’s insane. How – what – ”

“She sent me a text!”

“To let you know I was okay!” Kara shouted. “Andrea, what the hell is going on?”

“Don’t act like I’m stupid, Kara!” Andrea yelled. “I see how you two cuddle together, how she touches you, and how much you starve for her attention,” she snarled.

“Andrea!” Kara cried out, tears shooting in her eyes.

“I see how you react to her. I have done _everything_ for you, and you spit on me. God, Kara,” she ran a hand through her messy locks. “Am I not enough for you? Am I not – ”

“Of course you are!” Kara exclaimed, horrified. “Andrea – ”

“God, I fucking love you, Kara,” Andrea forced out.

When she turned to face Kara again, tears were shining in those blue eyes. When she spoke again, her voice was softer, more vulnerable. It pained Kara to see her like that.

“I love you so much, and I fucking adore you, and you thank me by fucking your boss?”

“I’m not!” Kara cried out. “How could you say that?”

“It’s just not enough, is it Kara?” Andrea choked out. “Everything I do – it’s just not enough. Not compared to her. I love you, but it’s not enough for you. You need more.”

“Andrea, I am not having sex with Lena, I don’t get – ”

“Don’t do that!” Andrea spat, and Kara recoiled.

It seemed that just Lena’s name could change the woman’s mode in the blink of an eye.

“Don’t act like I’m crazy, like I’m imagining things! I’m not crazy!”

“I never said you were!”

Andrea clenched her jaw. She released a shuddering breath. When she looked at Kara, her eyes flashed with anger and betrayal.

It almost made her look like a complete stranger.

Kara didn’t recognize her anymore. How could she, when the woman before her looked more like an evil villain from a movie than her actual girlfriend?

“Are you playing games with me, Kara?” Andrea asked lowly. “Are you just dating me until the next hot millionaire picks you up?”

“No of course not!” Kara yelled back through her tears. “That’s not fair.”

“Isn’t it? You don’t sleep over at my place. You’re always going on and on about Lena. Clearly I’m doing something wrong if she’s so much more interesting than me.”

“Andrea,” Kara cried out, hurt.

Andrea ignored her. “She gives you a pretty dress, you let her sleep over? Tell me, Kara. What’s your price?” she mocked. “Cause clearly I’ve been too cheap for you to stay true to me.”

This was unreal. This couldn’t be happening. This was surreal. Kara was stuck in a nightmare she couldn’t wake up from. Something was seriously, seriously wrong.

One minute she was sleeping off her inordinate amount of alcoholic drinks and the next Andrea was up there yelling at her, accusing her of terrible things, and basically calling her a slut.

This couldn’t be happening. This wasn’t okay. It wasn’t okay that Andrea was saying these things. That she was treating her like dirt. That she was insulting her to her face. It wasn’t okay that she wouldn’t listen. That she just barged in and started yelling, spouting the worst kind of insults Kara had ever heard in her life. It wasn’t –

“Get out,” Kara said, surprising herself with the coldness in her own voice.

That seemed to stump Andrea mid-speech too.

“What?”

“Get out! If you’re going to yell at me for absolutely no reason, then I want you to do it some other time, when I’m not having the worst headache of my life.”

“Kara,”

“You do not,” Kara yelled, “get to talk to me like that. I am not cheating on you. I never have and I never will. I don’t deserve the things you’re saying right now. No one does! If you think I would do any of those things, then you clearly don’t know me at all.”

Andrea’s lips pursed together tightly.

“Look,” Kara said slowly, her anger suddenly forcing back her hurt and pain, and making it so much easier to fight back. To argue. Her soul came alive just spitting back at Andrea.

“I don’t know who you are right now, or what you think gave you the right to talk to me like this, but when you’re ready to act like my girlfriend again, then you talk to me! But for right now?”

She took a step back.

“I want you to get the hell out of my apartment.”

Andrea looked at her with absolutely blazing eyes – the fire burning so intensely, so dangerously, that Kara wondered just for a second if Andrea would go any further. Would she hurt her? Was she capable of that?

In the end, Andrea merely clenched her jaw and shook her head. She seemed like she wanted to say something, but she changed her mind, and stormed out the door, slamming the door behind her.

Kara waited until she heard Andrea’s footsteps go down the stairs, and out on the streets. Until she was gone.

Then Kara took the nearest pillow and threw it at the door.

She heard a crack in the door, and realized she probably splintered some of the wood.

Kara balled her fists, feeling her nails dug in her flesh.

How could Andrea have just – how could she just…Why on earth would she…?

Kara screamed.

She screamed like her life depended on it, like she’d turned into Siobhan and her screams were deadly and could kill all of Andrea’s idiotic insecurities and all the stupid confusing thoughts in her own head, and all of Lena’s dubious glances and stares that she liked way too much and she could just….

She screamed.

She screamed like she didn’t have neighbors who’d probably be knocking on her door in minutes. She screamed like no one could hear her. She screamed out the frustrations she’d felt for so long.

Kara screamed until her voice was hoarse and painful. She stopped, gasping for air. She coughed a couple of times, feeling the burn in her throat.

Then she started crying.

Kara fell to her knees on the ground and sobbed.

How could Andrea say those things? How was this real?

She cried about Lena. About Andrea. About all the confusion and the pain, and all of Andrea’s sharp and painful words. She cried because she mourned the idea she had of Andrea in her head as the good, sweet woman who would never, ever think of hurting her.

She cried because it felt like she’d lost something she’d only just gotten. And she cried because all she wanted to do was talk to Lena about it, and cry it out on her shoulder.

The only woman who couldn’t be the one she went to.

She wanted _Lena_.

* * *

“Alright,” Alex said, “thank you everybody for coming. Especially you, Cat. I know we’re asking a lot of you. It means a lot to us that you came down.”

“Of course, dear,” Cat said, looking around the room. “But shouldn’t you wait to start the meeting until some of those very good-looking agents of yours can join us?”

Alex sighed.

“They won’t be joining us today,” Alex said. “This is a small team. We don’t have anything to go on yet. This mission has to stay secret, because we don’t technically have grounds to operate just yet. You understand?”

Cat sighed regretfully and over-exaggeratedly.

“Well that’s just a pity. Well,” she clicked her tiny purse close. “What can you do?”

Alex shot her a tight smile.

“Right. So,” she clicked on her pointer. “Let’s get down to business. This is our mission.”

“Now hold on just a moment,” Lillian spoke up and Alex sighed again.

Between Lillian and Cat, Alex’ early death seemed inevitable.

“I thought I was going to be the one on the mission. Wasn’t that our deal?” she asked with raised eyebrows.

“Yes,” Alex said. “It was. Unfortunately, we discussed it, and the team agrees that we don’t trust you – ”

“Don’t take it personal, Lillian, it’s just because they think you’re about as trustworthy as a Fox news segment,” Cat piped up, earning her a dirty glare from Lillian.

“So anyway,” Alex said pointedly, “we decided to go in a different direction. Cat’ll join to make sure that people approach the both of you, and that you don’t pull out a hidden knife to stab us in the back with.”

She smiled sweetly.

“You understand.”

“You’re putting me under supervision?” Lillian said icily.

“If that’s how you want to put it,” Alex said, putting on her presentation.

Cat smirked at Lillian.

“So – the goal of the evening is this gala,” Alex pulled up an invitation on the screen.

“You’ve both received an invitation to the event. The first thing you’ll do is just confirm that you’re going.”

Cat raised her eyebrows, but didn’t say anything.

“This is mission is strictly recon. Meaning, you keep your eyes peeled, you stay on the look-out for anything suspicious, and should anyone approach you about anything anti-alien related, you keep the conversation going,” Alex stressed. “We need names and faces. We’ve got a couple, but we think the leader of the group is among the party-goers. They’re the one we don’t have yet. They’re the one we have to catch.”

“Sounds easy enough,” Cat said. “But I doubt people will trust me with anything anti-alien related. They know about my history, my relation to Supergirl.”

“True,” Alex said. “Good point, Cat. That is why we initially thought of Lillian. However, we’re not sure how and why they approach people. A lot of the people involved have no history of xenophobia. In fact, some of them have businesses that support alien employees.”

Cat frowned.

“So they might be pushing a different angle,” she thought aloud.

Alex nodded, impressed.

“Exactly. Which is why we’d prefer two people instead of one.”

“And because you want to put me under supervision,” Lillian scoffed.

“Oh, don’t worry about it, Lillian. It’ll just be like those old days when we attended the same galas,” Cat said airily. “Shouldn’t be a problem.”

“I despised every second I had to spend with you at those galas.”

“Yet you smiled in front of the cameras.”

Cat picked up her coffee with a smile.

“It’s called acting, Lillian. You’ll figure it out.”

“Well anyway,” Alex broke up the bickering between the two women, “we need eyes and ears on the ground, so, Brainy.”

Brainy handed them each a pair of pearl earrings.

Lillian glanced at them and looked away in disgust.

“If you think I’m showing up to that ball wearing those _knock-offs_ , you’re dead wrong.”

Alex sighed tiredly.

“They have cameras and mics built in, Luthor. They’re not presents from the D.E.O. They’re so you can spy for us. Remember? Your job.”

Lillian scowled.

Cat chuckled.

“Cheer up, Lillian. With whatever atrocity of a dress you manage to find to wear, I’m sure no one will be looking at your earrings.”

Lillian took a deep insulted breath and Alex bemoaned her own fate.

How did she go from director of the freaking D.E.O. to babysitter of two of the richest, evilest, cattiest CEO’s the world had ever known?

“Need I remind you that I am one of the top – ”

Alex tuned out. Those two could fight out their differences while Alex went over security plans. Hopefully they’d cool down before the party.

* * *

The night of the party, Alex was a nervous wreck.

She was at the D.E.O. with Lena and Brainy, overseeing all of the activity of the gala. She’d shot Kara a text telling her to stay away from the party, as they didn’t want to attract any attention, but she hadn’t gotten a response.

Kara had read it though, so Alex couldn’t find it in herself to worry.

Cat and Lillian would each be taking separate cars to the event. They had gotten strict orders not to band together, just the two of them. They should always try to be in the same circle of speakers, but they shouldn’t give the illusion that they had met up beforehand. Everybody knew those two couldn’t really stand each other. It would raise suspicions should they suddenly talk and walk the party together.

Alex was biting her nails nervously. Two untrained agents on a stealth mission in the lion’s den. She truly was pulling out all the stops and signing her own obituary.

“Will you relax?” Lena said. “You’re making me nervous.”

Alex sighed and dropped her hand.

They were all staring at the television screen in the conference room, which would soon display both Cat and Lillian’s camera and audio recordings.

“It’s just – they’re not trained agents,” Alex said. “They weren’t trained for this, they weren’t prepared – ”

“You prepared them,” Lena reminded her. “They’re smart women. You shouldn’t underestimate them, but you shouldn’t underestimate yourself either. You know how to create a solid agent in a short amount of time.”

Alex cracked a smile.

“I remember giving you a quick training when Reign was our top priority. You did do pretty great.”

Lena scoffed. “Right, but you shouldn’t overestimate yourself either, I was already pretty badass.”

Alex laughed, and a bit of the tension in the room seeped away.

“I can attest to that,” Brainy spoke up. “The way you handled 31st century technology was truly impressive.”

Lena smiled softly. “Thanks, Brainy.”

Brainy frowned. “I was merely stating a fact, I do not understand your need for – ”

“Just take the thank you, Brainy,” Alex interrupted him.

Brainy’s eyes widened before he shook his head and attempted to smile at Lena.

“You’re welcome,” he said, a tad uncomfortable.

“It’s starting,” Alex said tersely.

Lillian showed up first. The party was already in full swing when she arrived, and she didn’t bother greeting anyone before she snatched a glass of champagne of a server’s tray.

“Classy, mom,” Lena mumbled.

“We have got to get a memo out about drinking on the job,” Alex muttered, folding her arms.

Cat showed up a little later. Someone must’ve forgotten to tell her that being ‘fashionably late’ didn’t apply to government missions.

Still, Alex acquiesced, they were both at the party, they were both ready. It was more than she could’ve hoped for a week ago.

Both Lillian and Cat moved through the crowd with an expertly natural ease, which Alex could admit her own agents would never be able to replicate. What rich CEO’s could be useful for, she mused.

The first hour of tape was incredibly boring.

Alex had slumped down in her chair after the first fifteen minutes of boring small-talk with godawful, annoying, self-centered rich folks. How Lena could remain attentive and interested was beyond her. But the other woman stayed on the video, meticulously following every small action she could observe, and diligently scribbling down every notable interaction she could observe, which granted, weren’t many.

Lillian and Cat both talked to an innumerable amount of people, but all of them were vague, non-threatening figures. No one stood out. No one asked them questions that could lead to anything more.

It was all so mind-numbingly boring.

Her phone rang, and she absentmindedly answered it, without tearing her already itchy eyes from the screen.

“Danvers.”

_“Hey, Alex, it’s Sam.”_

“Sam,” Alex sat up straight in her chair.

“Hi- I mean, hey, ehm, how are you? Are you okay?”

Sam chuckled, and Alex had to swallow the rush of feelings bubbling up inside of her.

Lena shot her exactly one unimpressed look before she went back to staring at the screen.

_“I’m okay, Alex. Am I calling at a bad time?”_

“No! No, definitely not. You could never, ehm… W-what’s up?”

She cringed inwardly at her lovesick, awkward way of talking. Sam just brought it out of her lately.

_“Well, I don’t know how big of a deal this is, but I was going to your apartment to drop your clothes off – ”_

Sam had insisted on giving Alex something fresh to wear after she’d stayed over last time, so she’d washed and ironed her old clothes.

“Thank you,” Alex blushed. “You really didn’t have to do that.”

 _“But I did,”_ Sam countered, and Alex could just hear the smirk in her voice. _“But that’s not why I’m calling though.”_

“Oh?”

_“Yeah, ehm, on my way up, I bumped into Kara.”_

“Okay?”

_“She didn’t look too good, Alex. She looked like she’d been crying.”_

“Crying?” Alex asked, a frown on her face. “Are you sure?”

_“Yes. At least, I think I am. She definitely didn’t look great, Alex. She was looking for you, and when I said you were at the D.E.O., she seemed to remember that. Still, she didn’t seem like she wanted to disturb you at work. I asked if she needed to talk, but she said she was fine and went home.”_

Alex leaned back in her chair and rubbed at her forehead.

 _“Do you know what happened?”_ Sam asked. _“Did she call?”_

“No,” Alex muttered. “She didn’t.”

_“Oh.”_

“Yeah.”

_“Well maybe she didn’t want to bother you. Or maybe I was reading too much into it, I don’t know. I’m sorry I called.”_

“No!” Alex said, a little louder than she wanted to. “I like when you call. And, ehm, I really appreciate you calling. It means a lot. Thank you. I’ll text Kara. It might be nothing.”

 _“Yeah,”_ Sam said. _“Maybe she was just upset about something small.”_

“Maybe they were out of dumplings,” Alex quipped.

“ _Exactly,”_ Sam laughed _. “I’m sure she’s fine. I just wanted to make sure she had someone to check up on her.”_

“I will,” Alex said with a small smile. “Thanks, Sam.”

 _“You’re welcome,”_ Sam said softly.

Alex smiled.

“ _By the way,”_ Sam added, _“I really enjoyed you staying over last night.”_

“I did too,” Alex said softly. “You’re an excellent host.”

Sam laughed huskily.

 _“Ruby was so happy to see you this morning,”_ Sam said, and Alex smiled at the memory.

She’d woken up on Sam’s couch to a bunch of squeals, and then the weight of a healthy sixteen-year-old had fallen on her chest, as said sixteen-year-old jumped on top of her – accompanied by Sam’s worried protests.

Alex hadn’t minded though.

Not even the throbbing in her head could stop her from grinning widely at seeing Ruby’s sweet, happy face. It had been a while since someone had been that excited to see her. Ruby and her had spent the morning eating breakfast on the couch, huddled in blankets, watching early morning cartoons. Sam had joined them only after she’d prepared an entire feast for Alex and Ruby.

Sam seriously was an angel. She’d prepared all of Alex’ favorites like it was no big deal, and she had spent her entire morning just… being with Alex and Ruby.

She’d looked so soft without her make-up, in just a soft woolen red and brown flannel over a blank tank-top and some skinny jeans. Alex had never seen her look like that before. It made her feel all kinds of confused.

 _“Just Ruby?”_ Alex whispered, a playful hint of a tone in her voice.

Sam paused.

 _“No,”_ she said breathily – making Alex’ head a little dizzy, “ _not just Ruby.”_

Alex wrung her hands, not quite sure what the next move was. She’d just gotten out of a relationship. Like, days ago. So it was completely insane to ask Sam out, right?

Yet somehow –

 _“Will you have dinner at our place tomorrow night?”_ Sam asked quickly.

Well that helped.

“I – sure. I would love to. What can I bring?”

 _“Nothing. I want to show off my amazing cooking skills,”_ Sam joked. _“Since you seemed to enjoy breakfast enough this morning.”_

Alex blushed.

“I can’t help it. You’re amazing at everything,” she whined.

Sam fell quiet on the other end of the phone.

“Sam?”

_“Nothing! I mean – You’re just too sweet, Alex. I can’t wait to see you again.”_

Alex beamed. “Me either.”

She heard Sam chuckle on the other end of the line.

 _“Well I should let you get back to work,”_ Sam said. _“Lena just iMessaged me to say that we should stop –_ Lena! _Well, that you should get back to work,”_ Sam coughed.

“Right,” Alex said, shaking her head. “I’ll let you go. Thanks for calling me.”

_“Please let me know if everything’s alright with Kara. I’m worried about her.”_

“I’ll text you as soon as I talk to her, okay?”

 _“Okay,”_ Sam smiled. _“See you tomorrow, Alex.”_

“See you tomorrow,” Alex blushed. “Bye.”

She hung up the phone and looked up. Lena was still standing up straight on heels that could impossibly be described as comfortable – staring at the screen. She hadn’t budged in over an hour.

“What did you text Sam?” Alex asked suspiciously.

“I told her to quit flirting. We’ve got work to do.”

“W-what? I wasn’t… we weren’t – ”

Lena turned around for a second to throw her a look.

“Fine,” Alex grumbled, standing up. “Anything new so far?”

“Not yet,” Lena said slowly, “but there’s someone else coming. People are buzzing about it. Some important guy or whatever. Someone not on the list.”

“Do we think he’s the leader?” Alex asked, leaning in closer, seeing the men in tasteful suits talking to women in extravagant dresses.

“I don’t know,” Lena said with a frown. “But I already told Cat and my mother to make contact with the guy.”

“Good,” Alex nodded.

She regarded Lena for a bit.

“I never thanked you for taking care of Kara last night.”

Lena stiffened.

“There’s nothing to thank me for,” Lena said, eyes trained on the screen before her. “Sam needed to go home, Lucy had a guy waiting for her, and you were drunk. It was only logical I helped her out.”

“Yeah,” Alex admitted, “but I’ve seen my sister drunk. She is not an easy drunk;”

That did get Lena to smile.

“No, she isn’t.”

“She give you a hard time?”

Lena smiled softly.

“No, no, we just… we talked.”

“About?”

Lena shook her head, and blushed just the tiniest bit.

“Oh, just, silly things. You know.”

“No,” Alex said with an arched eyebrow. “I don’t know.”

Lena blushed.

“Did you, I don’t know, talk about Andrea?”

“Sure,” Lena said.

“Did Kara say anything about her? Last night I mean?”

Lena frowned. “Can you be more specific?”

“I wish that I could,” Alex said. “Just… did she mention anything? Like, did they get into a fight or something?”

“No, not that I know of,” Lena frowned. “Why?”

“Well, cause Sam said she saw Kara, and that she looked upset.”

“Upset? Upset why?”

“Well, I don’t know,” Alex said frustratedly. “I just thought it might’ve been because of something Andrea said? I don’t know, she seemed off last night. I thought they might’ve gotten into a fight.”

“Well,” Lena said after a pensive beat, “she didn’t say anything about a fight. But to be honest, it wouldn’t have surprised me if she had. I mean, did you see how possessive she was last night.”

Alex sighed. “It was unbelievable. I’m going to have a talk with Kara about it. I don’t know what was up with Andrea, but she was way over the line.”

“Oh my God,” Lena whispered.

Alex turned to her with a frown.

“What? You don’t agree with me?”

“No, I mean look!” She pointed at the screen, the color draining from her face. “Speak of the devil.”

Alex turned to look at the screen in front of them.

There, captured by both Lillian and Cat’s camera’s, sporting a beautiful golden gown and a scarlet smirk, was Andrea fucking Rojas.

“Oh my God,” Alex said.

Lena’s wide disbelieving eyes mirrored Alex’ words perfectly.

The woman on the screen had apparently captured quite the audience there too. Heads turned, conversations halted, and people stopped to stare.

“Cat,” Alex said hoarsely into the microphone. “Lillian. _Her_. Talk to her.”

She exchanged a worried look with Lena.

This couldn’t be good.

* * *

“Cat Grant!”

Cat turned around with an air of practiced mild disinterest when she heard her name being called out.

From the moment Andrea Rojas had walked into the room, she’d been swept up in conversations by greedy rich people, all desperate for her attention.

Alex had called in and explained that it would be wiser for Cat and Lillian not to flock to Andrea like all the other people in the room but to let Andrea notice them herself instead.

And indeed, it had worked.

Andrea broke of a conversation with a pale, sweaty looking man Cat deduced worked in finances – based on the ever-present frown on his face and the nervous tick of his fingers – and made her way over to Cat instead.

“Yes?” Cat asked politely.

She couldn’t be overeager. She didn’t know the woman, it would be suspicious for her to act too familiar.

Luckily, Andrea Rojas seemed very excited to meet her.

The other woman beamed at her.

“Andrea Rojas,” she pointed to herself. “I hope you don’t mind. I am such an admirer of yours, I just had to come over and introduce myself.” 

“How nice,” Cat said politely, shaking the other woman’s hand. “Rojas from Rojas Fashion Industries, I assume?”

Andrea smiled widely.

“Yes! CatCo has featured our outfits in many an article!” 

Cat hummed and looked the woman up and down.

“All of them positive?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.

Andrea didn’t let the comment deter her. She let out a short laugh.

“Kara told me you were very honest. She didn’t tell me you were funny though!”

“Kara?” Cat piped up, the name giving her pause. “You know Kara Danvers?”

Andrea’s smile widened.

“Yes! She’s my girlfriend, actually,” Andrea said proudly. “We’ve been together a couple of months now.”

While that was definitely news to Cat, she couldn’t let her astonishment take over. She could deal with Kara and her inability to keep Cat up-to-date on her life later.

“Ah,” Cat said. “For a second there, I thought Kara had finally managed to get some sources for her articles, but, as I’ve seen time and time again – she doesn’t have sources, just people she befriends, and apparently,” Cat gestured at Andrea, “dates.”

“Oh,” Andrea laughed, “I wouldn’t say she has no sources in the journalistic world, she – ”

“No,” Cat cut her off with a glare, “I’ve seen this before. Every single time I think this girl has gotten a grip on journalism, when she’s finally snagged an interview with a high-profile person, I read about their friendship in some trashy gossip magazine the next day,” Cat said exasperatedly. “I called her out on it when I read about her and Lena Luthor having lunch – ”

Andrea’s smile tightened.

“And she just told me Lena was ‘so great,’” Cat quoted, “and ‘so wonderful’ that she couldn’t help but befriend her.”

Cat shook her head, although she couldn’t quite suppress a tiny smile from playing around her lips.

“That girl cares too much to have ‘just’ sources.”

“Her heart is indeed very big,” Andrea smiled tightly. “I can barely keep track of all her many, _many_ friends.”

“I’m sorry, I just had to interrupt.”

Cat rolled her eyes as Lillian squeezed past her to shake Andrea’s hand.

“Lillian Luthor,” the woman said with a smile so fake and sour it almost made Cat want to reconsider her deal with the D.E.O. entirely.

“Andrea Rojas,” Andrea said, but the glee and excitement in her voice when she met Cat seemed to have disappeared on the spot. “I didn’t know they still let ex-criminals into events like this.”

“Once a socialite, always a socialite, dear,” Lillian smiled haughtily. “The invites to these events just keep coming. I thought I had to show my face at at least one of them.”

“How quaint,” Andrea said dryly.

“Now,” Lillian said, “did I not just hear you mention my daughter’s name?”

“I… yes,” Andrea said reluctantly. “We were talking about Kara Danvers and then – ”

“Ah,” Lillian said dismissively. “The reporter. Yes, she and my daughter seem to get on splendidly.”

“So I’ve noticed,” Andrea said, Cat noting the dry distaste in her voice.

“Who wouldn’t,” Cat rolled her eyes. “That girl could befriend even the darkest of souls. Walking around CatCo with her was a trial – she greeted every person we passed, and knew them all by name.”

Cat shook her head.

“It was exhausting.”

She couldn’t help the little uptick of the corners of her mouth though, as she remember fondly how Kara would run around CatCo, stacks of paper in her hands, and tens of shopping bags on her arms – doing it all with a gigantic, infectious grin. Cat still remembered how much kinder people were when she was around Kara, simply because they loved the girl so much.

“Your daughter must be so lucky to have her as a friend,” Cat couldn’t help but say over her shoulder.

Lillian threw her a sour look, which Cat easily shrugged off with a smirk.

Andrea turned back to Cat with a full-on smile though.

“That sounds like my Kara!” she said cheerily. “I don’t think I’ve heard her say a bad word about anyone, ever. Not even my own security guard, who almost had her arrested!”

“Arrested?” Cat asked bewildered. “How could she get arrested?”

Lillian chuckled, and had a sip of her champagne, looking innocent enough when Cat glared at her.

“Ah, yes,” Andrea smiled, “that is a long story. One that I’d be happy to share with you later, but Cat! I’ve been wanting to meet you for so long! I have so much I need to discuss with you before we get to my girlfriend.”

She laughed.

“I’ve looked up to your management style for years!”

“Have you?” Cat asked politely, taking a sip of her champagne.

“Yes!” Andrea said. “I was devastated to hear you were leaving CatCo right around the time I decided to get more involved in Rojas Fashion Industries! I truly wanted to establish a partnership between our two companies.”

“Well my daughter owns CatCo now,” Lillian cut in. “I’m sure you could manage to strike up a deal over a business lunch?”

Andrea clenched her jaw and turned to Lillian with a smile faker than Courtney Cox’ cheeks after her Botox job.

“Yes, I just _have_ to set that up,” she said through clenched teeth.

“You should,” Lillian agreed. “It would be a superb collaboration, I’m sure. My daughter is a very capable CEO. Forbes even called her employer of the year, as you might have read.”

Cat rolled her eyes.

“Speaking of collaborations, Cat,” Andrea said. “I know you’ve given up CatCo and the whole management lifestyle, but I hear you still love to do a little investing, is that true?”

Cat could almost hear the palpable excitement from agent Alex Danvers in her ear, and she shook her head irritably, before putting on her business face.

“You heard correctly,” Cat replied. “Though I am very selective in which organizations I elect to support financially.”

“Of course,” Andrea beamed. “I would expect nothing less from a business-woman like yourself! But what if I told you,” she whispered conspiratorially, “that I knew of a great new investment? One with an excellent pay-off?”

“I’d say you were making me promises like you were a man about to go down on his knee for me. That’s to say,” Cat arched an eyebrow, “I’m twice divorced. I’d say I’m a sceptic.”

Andrea laughed.

“Catherine Grant,” she shook her head. “You sound exactly like the kind of woman I should go in business with. Please,” she gestured at a waiter to exchange Cat’s near-empty glass for a new one, “let me make my case for you.”

Cat sighed, playing her part well.

“Very well. This investment opportunity… you’re the CEO?”

“Oh, God no,” Andrea laughed, “I’m more of an outside investor. Though I have stepped in to deal with the financial side of things. Finding other outside investors, making sure the organization doesn’t go over budget, the boring stuff,” she concluded with a smile.

Lillian and Cat exchanged a glance.

“But I’m always eager to find new blood for the organization. Although, Lillian,” the woman added reluctantly, “you might want to hear us out as well. That is, if your name is still tied to any substantial funds?” she added with a slight sneer.

Lillian smiled sourly at the woman.

“Don’t worry about me, dear. I get by.”

“Wonderful,” Andrea bit back before smiling at Cat again.

“So what can you tell us about this… organization?” Cat asked, trying to sound as cool and disinterested as possible. “What’s its name?”

“Well,” Andrea teased, “I can’t go into too many details. Those are reserved for our investors only – which could include you, if you’re willing.”

“I like to know where my money is going before I write a blank check,” Cat said dryly. “I didn’t come this far in life by giving away all my money to the first beautiful woman with a business plan.”

“You flatter me,” Andrea chuckled. “But of course, I completely understand. What I can tell you,” she said moving closer, “is that we’re a one-of-a-kind organization – no other company has achieved what we have, or has even advanced enough in its field to try and copy us. We’re called Obsidian.”

“Obsidian. You’re a tech organization?” Lillian asked.

“Oh no, nothing of the sort. We are more of a – well,” Andrea smiled, “you could almost call us a philanthropic organization of sorts!”

“By my knowledge, philanthropic organizations rarely make profit, unless they’re doing it wrong,” Cat commented with an arched eyebrow.

Andrea laughed. “That would be correct. Let’s just say our business isn’t philanthropic then. But it sure is a positive organization with a focus on creating a better world.”

“Sounds very utopic,” Lillian noted.

“It does, doesn’t it?” Andrea chuckled. “Our organization was founded by multiple people working towards the same goal. That’s why we don’t have one CEO,” Andrea laughed. “We’re truly very progressive as an organization.”

“No CEO,” Lillian noted with arched eyebrows. “That sounds like an ineffective way to run a company. Then who’s in charge?”

“It’s very effective!” Andrea beamed. “More effective than I’d expected truly! All of us, investors, creators, brilliant minds – you name it – we work together to assure that our company moves forward the best way we know how. You could compare it to a board of investors running the company instead of just one person.”

Lillian and Cat exchanged a short glance, one Andrea luckily missed.

“But let me reassure you that we’ve found that our… services will be well-received in many countries. In fact,” she smirked cockily, “we’ve estimated that we’ll have an off-set market that includes Europe, North America and parts of Asia in our first months of business. Other countries and territories will follow suit after seeing our success, we’re sure.”

“Services,” Cat said skeptically. “So you’re not promoting a product?”

Andrea laughed.

“Forgive me, it’s hard to explain. Like I said before, I can only share so much with outsiders.”

“So far, you haven’t shared anything,” Cat said haughtily. “How do you expect people to donate money to an organization with no face and no clear substance?”

“Let me put it this way,” Andrea countered. “How many problems has our city experienced in the last couple of years, hmm?”

Cat shook her head confused.

“Kryptonian attackers, floods of crimes committed with aliens weaponry, hell,” Andrea took a sip of her drink, “three years ago we were wiped out by those Daxamite invaders.”

“You’re focusing on aliens,” Cat realized tensely. “Your philanthropical business is focused on alien life.”

Andrea smiled conspiratorially.

“Now I’ve already revealed more than I should. Let’s just say we’re in the security business. We’re an organization that’s based on the prevention of further attacks on our city.”

“By aliens,” Cat finished her sentence.

“Not exclusively,” Andrea shook her head. “We’re a versatile company. All we want to do is protect National City.”

“Ah,” Lillian noted with a smile, “this sounds familiar. If your goal is to wipe out alien life, my dear, I can tell you from experience that you’re running a mob, not an organization.”

Cat threw her a look.

“The DA’s words, not mine,” Lillian said.

“We’re not a gang or a mob,” Andrea interrupted. “We aren’t dangerous or evil, or anti-alien for that matter! In fact, we’ve even got alien contractors and employees who would gladly attest to that! We are nothing like the Children of Liberty or Cadmus, for that matter,” Andrea said. “The goal of this organization is not to gang up on innocent aliens seeking refuge on this planet. All we want is a fairer, more secure world, that evolves with the needs of the society.”

“Sweetheart, I’ve heard those words before,” Lillian said condescendingly, “in fact, I’ve used those same words – though I put it more eloquently, I’m sure – when I was in charge of Cadmus. I don’t know what kind of organization you think you’re running, but as far as I can tell, it’s not very legal.”

“Contrary to organizations like Cadmus, ours is a legit business moving within the confines of the law,” Andrea bit back, visibly insulted. “People like you are the reason we keep our business plans under wraps for now. Too many judging eyes on a wholesome project.”

“I thought you were scared people were going to copy you,” Cat countered. “Isn’t that what you said?”

“I – yes, but – ”

“It seems to me dear,” Cat said dismissively, “from what I’ve gathered so far, that all you have is money, a number of investors, a vague name, and a dubious consensus at best. At this point, I see no reason why I should invest any of my capital in your organization. Now, what can you say to me about your case to make me reconsider?”

Andrea grimaced, and it was not an attractive look, whatsoever, Cat noted.

“Because it seems to me, if you couldn’t attract investors with your actual business plan, all you had to pull them in were promises of safety, and crude remarks about aliens. Tell me, dear,” Cat narrowed her eyes, “what sort of investors does that attract exactly?”

Andrea scoffed and looked away, shooting a smile and a wave at some hesitant onlookers who’d caught wind of their heated discussion. She mouthed a quick “in a minute!” to an older looking couple, and smiled broadly as they toasted their glass to her.

When she turned back to Cat and Lillian however, that glee was nowhere to be found. Her smile was still there, but her eyes and voice were ice cold.

“You know,” Andrea said bitterly, “I’ve always admired you, Cat. You stomped CatCo out of the ground yourself, without anyone’s help. You created an imperium using your wit, your skills, and your charisma. I always, always wanted to be just like you when I took over Rojas Industries – ”

“Cute,” Cat said dryly.

“When I saw you here tonight,” Andrea continued, ignoring the older woman, “I thought my wishes had come true. We could form a partnership, an alliance. I thought that I could work with the woman I saw as my mentor for years, and I could be proud of the accomplishments I’d achieved. But unfortunately,” Andrea said, “I now see that such a partnership isn’t possible.”

“Dear,” Cat rolled her eyes, “if you can’t take the base form of a bit of criticism on your meagre presentation of your business, then I honestly don’t know if you’ve ever studied my style of management.”

“It doesn’t sound like criticism, more like a close-minded conservative attitude,” Andrea said snarkily. “What we as an organization represent is progress, innovation, and evolution.”

She scoffed.

“I guess it was too much for me for me to hope that someone as frozen in the old ways of business like yourself could ever opt to thrive in a new world.”

“Careful who you call old, my dear,” Cat said dryly. “Without CatCo, Rojas Fashion Industries would be just another Forever 21 knock-off.”

Next to her, Lillian did a bad job at suppressing a chuckle with her hand.

Andrea clenched her jaw, visibly suppressing her anger. The spark that flashed in her eyes would impress Cat, if she didn’t feel such deep disdain for a woman so fake, and so unnaturally cold.

Cat had met a lot of terrible people in her lifetime. People – that when she thought about them, made her miserable and sick, and on the verge of gagging – but Andrea Rojas… Cat couldn’t pinpoint what exactly made her so awful. Made Cat want to push the woman away so hard.

Was it her fake, broad smile?

Her obvious narcissism?

Or was it the fact that she was dating Kara Danvers, a woman so kind and pure, Cat couldn’t help but feel protective over her? Was it the thought of that wolf of a person devouring the light of someone who deserved so much better?

Whatever it was, Cat would surely have a talk with Kara about choosing eligible partners in the near future.

“When Obsidian is launched,” she said coldly, a broad fake smile still plastered on her face. “When all the governments and businesses in the world will be knocking down our doors to do business with us, then,” she sneered, “then you’ll be sorry. Sorry you ever missed the chance of investing in our company. You’ll come crawling back, clinging to the hope you’ll ever _be_ someone again. And I will tell you,” she whispered, “to fuck right off.”

“Sweetheart,” Cat said sweetly, “with the way you’re handling things, if your business ever takes off, I’ll send you a fucking fruit basket.”

“Don’t bother,” Andrea sneered. “I don’t need anything from a washed out fifty-year-old CEO who couldn’t even hold on to her own fucking company, losing it to a Luthor of all people. And then not even a real one,” she laughed disbelievingly. “You lost your company to a third-rate heiress knock-off, who can’t even be bothered to actually get involved. What a legacy.”

In a twisting turn of events, before Cat could even open her mouth to retort with yet another witty comment, Andrea’s comment was met by someone else entirely.

“It’s rather rich of you to criticize someone like Lena, don’t you think, dear?” Lillian noted, almost politely.

Andrea sighed – rather like an annoyed sixteen-year old, Cat thought – and turned to Lillian.

“Excuse me?” she asked bored.

“Well,” she said with a small smile, “if I remember correctly, you both inherited a billion dollar company, but only she has managed to bring hers out of the depths of an economic crisis, public downfall, and near-bankruptcy only to quadruple the highest profit margins the company has known throughout its existence.”

“What’s your point?” Andrea bit.

“Well, by the last accounts, since you’ve taken over Rojas Industries a couple of years ago, your profits have largely stagnated. You’re not losing anything,” Lillian said condescendingly, “but you’re also not actually doing anything with the company. Progress without progress, dear,” Lillian narrowed her eyes, “is failure. So before you think to call my daughter a – ”

She paused and looked at Cat.

“What was it again?”

“I believe it was a third-rate heiress knock-off,” Cat smiled. “That’s what you said wasn’t it?”

Andrea clenched her jaw.

“Right,” Lillian smiled, “before you ever call my daughter a third-rate heiress knock-off again, you should keep that in mind. But also – ”

She took a step closer to Andrea who stiffened, alarmed.

Lillian’s expression turned ice cold, and Cat remembered just how this woman had been involved with many of the most dangerous movements in the history of National City.

“If you ever insult my daughter again, I will personally assure that the FBI – who’s relying closely on my intel, you might have heard – gets their hands on some less than savory transactions in your business, and I will make sure that within weeks, all that’ll be left of Rojas Industries will be the letters they managed to tear down from what used to be your building, just to throw them at your feet, as you weep and wonder how in the hell you could’ve been stupid enough to piss off a Luthor,” Lillian concluded icily.

Andrea paled considerably.

Her mouth opened a bit, almost as if her body was trying to stammer its way out of the situation, before she regained her momentum and shook her head.

She put on a fake smile and looked at the two women again. Clearly trying to suppress all the anger and hate she felt towards the two women at the moment.

“I’m saddened we couldn’t entice a spark for Obsidian with you two,” she said mechanically. “Obsidian will regretfully continue its search for new investors. We would politely request that you do not share the information you’ve acquired here tonight, as the name is still being patented. Please enjoy a drink on us, and some of the best appetizers to be found in the City, curtesy of Bistro Crème Fraiche.”

She excused herself with a smile and a: “have a nice evening,” and then Andrea Rojas walked away.

The comms in Cat’s ears were completely quiet. It seemed that even Director Danvers couldn’t quite comprehend what had happened just now.

Cat pursed her lips and looked at Lillian.

“Well I can’t say that was very fruitful.”

Lillian smiled sourly.

“On the contrary,” she said, taking a sip from her champagne, “I think we’ve found a lot.”

“How?” Cat asked annoyed. “She couldn’t even tell us the name of the person in charge! We don’t even know what they’re planning.”

“We know enough,” Lillian said. “She’s clearly delusional. She thinks that her project, whatever it is, is legal. So we know she’s trying to stay within the confines of the law, but – ”

Lillian bumped her shoulder against Cat’s.

“Look around you, Cat. Don’t some of these faces look familiar?”

Cat frowned and looked around.

At first glance, the people in the room simply looked like well-dressed rich people. Like the people she used to meet on a daily basis.

However, at Lillian’s insistence, she observed her surroundings more closely. And indeed…

“Is that… George Forman? Wasn’t he part of the Agents of Liberty?”

Lillian smiled.

“Yes, although he was smart enough not to go public, and to get out before it was too late. He was never arrested or named in the case against them. And that woman over there – ”

Cat looked at a classic looking woman in her seventies, clad in a golden dress and a perfectly manicured hairstyle.

“She was a big investor for Cadmus – Elaine Doherty. Rich socialite. Never got involved, she was just a big believer in our cause and was willing to donate money to make sure we succeeded.”

“Tragic,” Cat said dryly.

“Don’t I know it,” Lillian responded. “And again, her involvement was kept quiet so – ”

“She was never arrested,” Cat said softly.

It dawned on her.

“All these people in the room… they’re involved with Andrea’s Obsidian, aren’t they?”

“Well, from my tour of the room, I think many are potential investors. I think the most part haven’t even heard of Andrea’s organization yet. She’s heard to persuade them to join her.”

“But the people you just mentioned…”

“I think they’re already involved, yes.”

Cat took a deep breath, glancing around the room.

“How many people here tonight do you think have ties to previous anti-alien organizations?” Cat asked, head held high as she tensed up visibly.

“From what I can tell,” Lillian said. “At least a dozen.”

“And they all got away with it,” Cat stated, not really needing an answer.

“They all got away with it,” Lillian confirmed.

“And you didn’t think to mention this until now?” Cat hissed.

“They’ve only gradually been pouring in,” Lillian snapped back.

“Fine, fine,” Cat barked. “So a room full of ex-alien haters.”

“Precisely,” Lillian replied, glancing around the room.

Cat swallowed.

“Well, then, I hope Agent Danvers is listening,” she said tersely. “Because so far the only thing we’ve discovered is that the company these people are involved with is called Obsidian.”

“And that it’s involved in the security business,” Lillian added. “Combine that with some anti-alien investors and dubious circumstances – ”

“And we’ve got ourselves a nasty new Cadmus,” Cat said.

“Or something like it,” Lillian agreed.

“Either way,” Cat realized, “Andrea Rojas is deeply involved with them. I can’t say how deep, but she certainly seems to be very enthusiastic about the whole project.”

“Did I really hear her say she was dating Kara Danvers?” Lillian asked.

“Director Danvers?”

Cat only got static in return.

Cat sighed and shook her head.

“I think we should go,” Lillian said. “I don’t think we’ll get anything more out of these people.”

Cat looked around and realized that Lillian was right. Doubtful, suspicious and haughty glances were thrown their way, and people weren’t even trying to cover their gossiping.

“Yes,” Cat said slowly, “I think we’ve overstayed our welcome.”

“Director Danvers,” Lillian asked sarcastically. “Do we have permission to leave now?”

It took a couple of seconds, but eventually, Alex Danvers’ voice came through their audio receivers.

“Yes,” a hoarse voice said. “Leave separately please.” 

Cat and Lillian exchanged a glance before silently bidding each other goodbye, and leaving in opposite directions.

* * *

Alex put the mic down on the table.

Her hand was trembling. She swallowed hard, before taking a deep breath and daring to glance sideways.

Lena was next to her, her face so pale Alex was almost afraid she’d faint.

They’d been quiet for the entire duration of Cat and Lillian’s interaction with Andrea, too dumbstruck to even react. But now…

Cat had stepped in her limo, heading to her penthouse in the city, so Alex turned her screen off. Lillian stayed for a handful of minutes more, mingling politely with a couple of people she knew well, before she too, left to go home.

With her camera turned off, there were no more excuses. Eventually, one of them had to speak up and address the elephant in the room, Alex knew. Might as well be her.

She took a deep, staggering breath.

“So,” she started, her voice coming out hoarser and more painful than she would’ve liked.

Lena turned her head slightly.

Alex saw her own pain, her own confusion, her own anger and helplessness reflected in Lena’s eyes.

“Andrea,” Lena said in return, her voice just as raspy.

“Maybe she is just an investor,” Alex said, but her own words sounded hallow with disbelief.

“You don’t actually believe that,” Lena said.

“No I don’t. At best she’s an ignorant accessory to a multitude of crimes…”

“And at worst she’s orchestrating all of it.”

A beat of silence and then –

“Fuck!” Alex exclaimed suddenly, breaking the silence in the room. She buried her face in her hands as her muffled shouts filled the room. “Fucking fuck! Goddamnit!”

“Alex – ”

“This isn’t fucking happening! This is just – ”

Alex shoved her hands down, and looked almost maniacal. She started pacing around the room, and kicked her frustration out against a trashcan, which shot through the room, and landed with a loud thud against the other wall, spilling its contents over the floor.

“Let’s just go through it again,” Lena insisted. “Alex, kicking things isn’t helping. Let’s just – ”

“What?” Alex interrupted harshly. “Go over the facts again? Like we’ll somehow find that two plus two equals five after all? It’s useless! We’ve turned this case over and over again,” she seethed. “We can’t keep looking at the same fucking papers and expect to see something different!”

“You know what, Alex?” Lena bit back. “How about I go through it again, and you kick another trashcan! Afterwards we can discuss which one of us made the most progress!”

Alex balled her fists, almost itching to take her anger out on Lena, before she pulled herself together.

“Fine,” she snapped, running her hands through her short red hair. “What do we know?”

“Well, first of we have the missing aliens,” Lena frowned. “The one who called us in a panic – ”

“James Hue. He’s a meta-human, not an alien. Disappeared from his house, Supergirl documented a struggle. She said they’d had to have come and gone in under three minutes.”

Lena figured it was too hard for Alex to pronounce her sister’s own name right now. She let Alex dissociate by using Supergirl as if she was somehow a completely different entity.

“We haven’t found a trace of him since he’s disappeared.”

“Okay,” Lena noted, “so meta-humans and aliens. Because what followed was the break-in at the D.E.O.”

“Again, no traces were found. No DNA, no tracks, no nothing. All of our detained aliens gone.”

Alex almost wanted to scream in frustration.

“Some of them were set to be released this week, and I can’t even tell their friends and family whether or not they’re still alive.”

Lena shot her a pitying look, but Alex refused to look her way. She closed her eyes for just a second before taking a deep breath and straightening up.

“So,” Alex rasped her throat. “Missing aliens, missing meta-humans.”

“Right,” Lena said, allowing Alex to switch subjects and ignore her feelings for a bit. “And Andrea spoke of a security organization, right? Something about protecting the city?”

“You think the organization only targeted aliens with a record?”

“Didn’t you say James Hue had been in and out of the D.E.O.?”

“Yes, for minor offenses,” Alex frowned. “He was a pain in my ass, but I wouldn’t exactly classify him as dangerous. More like a stupid idiot with self-destructive tendencies. But he’s not _bad_.”

“Right,” Lena said, “but that doesn’t take away from the fact that he had a record. What if that’s instrumental? What if that’s the pattern?”

“Aliens and meta-humans who’ve gotten in trouble with the law at one point in their lives?”

“Exactly!”

Alex saw the spark in Lena’s eyes that always indicated she’d come up with something. Whether it was discovering her brother’s alter ego’s in Kasnia, or the formula to an invention that could save Kara’s life, the spark of knowledge always meant Lena had made a connection in her mind, one that could always help them.

Alex leaned in.

“Aliens with a record,” she murmured. “You think that’s what Andrea’s after.

“She did say her organization was related to security and protection,” Lena reminded her. “She was quick to mention her ties with aliens. Maybe she’s just targeting the ones she thinks pose a problem to society.” 

“But the aliens we had were already detained!” Alex argued. “What’s safer than having them locked up and doing their time? Shooting them on sight?”

“I don’t know,” Lena sighed.

“Plus,” Alex added. “Not all of them were violent offenders! We’re just the only alien detention center in the city. You can’t lock up aliens and humans, because there’d be way too many incidents.”

“Right,” Lena noted. “So, the aliens at the D.E.O. would’ve gotten out eventually.”

“Well, yes,” Alex said. “After they’d done their time, of course. You can’t lock them up forever, that’d be inhuman.”

Lena nodded.

“Yes,” she said, “but maybe that’s what Andrea was talking about. Maybe her organization wants them locked up forever? I don’t know.”

She sighed and rubbed her brow with two fingers.

“I don’t know what to make of it.”

Alex sighed too, and sank down in a chair.

“But we know Obsidian’s dirty, right?” Alex asked.

Lena nodded.

“And we know Andrea’s in on it.”

Lena looked down, more tired than she’d seemed in weeks.

“So two plus two…”

“Andrea’s got something to do with the alien disappearances. And the attacks on the D.E.O. and that building.”

Alex nodded to herself.

“Fuck!” she yelled again, but this time, Lena couldn’t help but agree with her.

“How are we ever going to tell Kara?” she wondered aloud. “How on earth are we going to break this to her?”

“I don’t fucking know! I mean God!”

Lena shook her head.

“I never proclaimed to be a huge fan of Andrea’s, but that doesn’t mean I thought this was going to happen,” Lena argued. “I mean, Kara adores her! How could this… How could she – ”

She shook her head again, while Alex massaged her throbbing temples with a frown.

A short silence fell over them, before Alex could speak up. When she did, her voice sounded rough and painful, and way older than she would’ve liked.

“How do you tell a girl who’s gone through so much _shit_ in her lifetime, including but not limited to; losing her entire planet and family, losing her boyfriend because his mother hated her, almost dying a gazzilion times and discovering that her friend was moonlighting as a monster out to kill her, that her fucking girlfriend – her first girlfriend, her first partner in fucking _years_ – is part of an organization that kills and captures aliens?”

Lena looked away with a pained expression.

“I mean we’re clear on that, right?” Alex said desperately. “Her girlfriend is doing fuck knows what, and people are getting hurt! How can I tell her?”

“She loves Andrea,” Lena whispered. “It’s going to break her heart.”

“Fuck!” Alex yelled again, tears of powerlessness filling her eyes. “Goddamn fuck!”

Alex gave the empty trashcan another kick for good measure.

“Goddamn fucking hell!”

“Is she even going to believe us?” Lena asked suddenly. “Will she hear us out? I mean,” she looked worryingly up at Alex, “would you believe me if I told you? What if she won’t listen?”

Alex paused.

“I don’t know.”

“Would you even want to hear it?”

“I don’t know.”

“What if she gets mad, Alex?”

“God, I don’t know, Lena!” Alex burst out. “I don’t know. All I know is, I don’t want to be the one to tell Kara!”

“Tell me what?”

Lena and Alex turned around with a start, and saw a pale-looking Kara Danvers stand in the door-opening.

“What’s wrong?”

* * *

“Kara!” Alex called out, ushering her sister in. “Hey, Lena and I were just finishing up some mission reports. What brings you here?”

Kara frowned.

Lena noticed that her eyes were red-rimmed, and that she looked so much paler than usual. It was upsetting to see the lack of a smile around Kara’s lips, and the clasped hands in front of her tense body.

The blonde woman hesitantly stepped inside.

“I went by your building,” Kara said softly, “but you weren’t there. I waited, but I… I needed to see you.”

“I’m sorry, Kara, we were still on the case. We, ehm,” she shot Lena a nervous glance, “we did the infiltration mission tonight.”

Alex ran a hand through her short hair before trying to pull herself together.

“But what’s up? You okay? You eat yet?” Alex asked with a fake, trembling smile.

“I’m good, what did you find tonight?” Kara asked.

Her voice didn’t sound as enthusiastic and curious as it normally did, Lena noted. Her eyes were emptier, more guarded. She barely looked at her, instead choosing to address her sister. Kara’s usually vibrant blonde curls lay flat against her back, unwashed and unkept.

Something was wrong with Kara, and Lena was itching to ask what was bothering her.

But the idea of knowing how bad Kara was feeling before having to inform her of what they’d just seen was too much to bear.

So Lena kept her mouth shut, and instead locked eyes with Alex, who seemed to be on the verge of panicking.

“Kara,” Alex started.

“Maybe we should go somewhere,” Lena suddenly suggested. “Get some food. What do you think?”

Kara frowned, confused.

“I’m good,” she said, “I already ate. Let’s just go over what you found.”

Alex opened her mouth, but no sounds came out. The woman seemed to be flailing helplessly, unable to say anything.

It was clear that Kara wouldn’t take the news easily. In fact, she might end up turning on whoever decided to tell her about Andrea, and Lena knew Alex was fragile. She was hurting over Kelly leaving her, she was hurting because she didn’t know how she felt about Sam…

Lena knew Alex’ hesitations stemmed from a deep fear of having Kara push her away. Alex was mentally preparing herself to be the bad guy again, and Lena’s heart just clenched at the sight.

Alex’ hands were fidgeting, her brown eyes were big and worried, and her entire body seemed to tense up whenever Kara looked at her inquisitively.

On the other hand, Lena mused, Lena had had to fight so hard and so long to get to this point with Kara. To regain their friendship to a place close to where it once was. She could never take away the hurt, the lies and the pain on both sides, but they were trying. With every tentative smile, with every laugh, with every conversation on the phone before bed, Lena and Kara were finally, finally coming closer again.

Was she prepared to lose all that by breaking Kara’s heart? Was it even fair?

Lena looked from Kara to Alex.

Alex’ hands were fidgeting, her brown eyes were big and worried, and her entire body seemed to tense up whenever Kara looked at her inquisitively. The woman was a mess. She was terrified, mad and if Lena’s feelings were any indication of how Alex was feeling, completely floored by everything they’d seen tonight.

Kara’s eyes were tired, but not dull. She was still very aware of her surroundings, and by beating around the bush, Lena realized she and Alex were just heightening Kara’s concerns. Kara looked at Alex like she could provide all the answers in the universe, and she just couldn’t comprehend why Alex was hesitating now.

Lena took a deep breath, and decided that she couldn’t do it to Alex. She couldn’t let Alex hurt Kara, or let Kara by hurt by Alex. It was up to her, no matter how much she dreaded it, and no matter how long it would take for Kara not to associate her with the pain and misery that came from Andrea’s betrayal.

“Kara, maybe you should sit down,” Lena suggested softly.

Kara finally looked Lena in the eye.

Her worried blue eyes looked at Lena with slight apprehension and fear.

“Why?” she asked. “What’s wrong?”

“Kara – ”

“Alex?” Kara asked. “What’s wrong?”

Alex just shook her head.

Kara froze. Then she brought her hands up to squeeze her own upper arms.

She looked so small and insecure. So unlike Supergirl.

Kara turned back to Lena.

“Lena?” she asked, her voice just barely keeping out a tremble.

Lena nodded to herself, before shooting one last look at Alex – who looked almost as scared and insecure as Kara, like she too was waiting to hear about what had happened.

“Kara, it’s about Andrea,” Lena said quickly. Like ripping off a band-aid.

Clearly, Kara had expected literally anything but that.

“Andrea?” she asked confused. “What about her?”

Then her expression suddenly blanched.

“Did she come to see you?” she asked Lena. “Oh my God, did she come by your office?”

“What, no!” Lena said, shaking her head. “Kara… wait, why would she come look for me?”

“She…” Kara changed her mind and shook her head. “It’s nothing. Why are you bringing up Andrea?”

Lena swallowed her nerves and tried to keep her face cool and collected.

Just like any other business meeting, Lena reasoned. Just an impersonal, dry meeting.

Except the second she looked into Kara’s confused eyes – eyes she could stare in all day if she could – she knew that all along, they’d made things personal.

“Lena?”

“Kara, we have some bad news.”

Quick and honest.

Quick and honest.

Kara froze for just a second before she nodded slowly. Maybe she was grateful for the honestly.

“Okay,” she said cautiously, shooting a glance her sister’s way, “what is it?”

Quick and honest.

“You know my mother and Cat went to the gala tonight.”

“Yes,” Kara said impatiently, “I know. What did you see?”

“Kara,” Alex spoke up, “we were looking for people in charge of the organization, right?”

“Yes!” Kara said. “The people who were also responsible for the attacks around the city and the abduction of the aliens at the D.E.O.”

She shook her head.

“This isn’t new to me, guys.”

“Right,” Lena said tensely, “we just want you to keep that in mind, okay? We agreed that the organization is bad news.”

“Very bad,” Kara agreed. “I’m convinced, I’m keeping it in my mind.”

“Okay,” Alex said, “okay.”

“Well,” Lena scraped her throat, “Cat and my mother were there for a long time. They walked around but didn’t see anything suspicious.”

“So we didn’t find anything,” Kara frowned. “The case was a bust?”

Alex and Lena exchanged a glance.

“Not really,” Lena said. “There were talks of someone important showing up. Someone with ties to the organization.”

“So we found the leader?” Kara piped up. “That’s great!”

“We’re not actually sure there’s a single leader,” Alex said. “The organization seems to be made up of a lot of different people. Not just the person who showed up at the party.”

“So?” Kara said impatiently. “It’s a start! We just get that person in an interrogation room or we shadow them or whatever, and boom.”

Kara snapped her fingers.

“We get the organization, find the missing aliens, arrest the bad guys, case closed.”

Lena looked at Alex.

“Okay, can you stop doing that?”

Lena jumped a bit at the words.

“Sorry?”

“You and Alex have been sharing looks ever since I got here!” Kara said irritably. “There’s clearly something I’m not in on, but can you at least make it less obvious? The sharing glances thing is really annoying.”

Lena nodded.

“Sorry,” Alex whispered.

“Didn’t mean to,” Lena said.

Kara softened and interlaced her fingers.

“I’m sorry,” she said, bowing her head. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you for something so silly. Sorry. I don’t know why I – sorry.”

“It’s fine, Kara,” Lena said softly. “You’re right. There’s something you need to know. And we want to tell you, but we’re also – we know you won’t like what you’ll hear, and we’re scared you’ll be mad at us.”

“Lena,” Kara said softly. “I think I’d rather know. You can tell me. I won’t get mad at you.”

She smiled a tiny smile.

“You two are the most important people in my life,” she whispered. “I can’t get mad at you for trying to be careful around me. But still,” she implored, “I want to know. Whatever it is,” she smiled carefully, “I can handle it. _We_ can handle it.”

Lena nodded, swiftly.

“Remember that,” she whispered, as her throat suddenly felt uncomfortably constricted. “Please.”

Kara nodded.

“I will.”

Lena took a deep breath.

“While Cat and Lillian were waiting for someone to arrive, ehm, they were surprised.”

“Surprised how?”

“Because the person who walked in – the woman who walked in – ”

“Woman?” Kara asked.

Then she still completely.

She froze, with not a muscle twitching, or a hair moving in place. It was like she’d turned into stone right where she was sat.

Kara wasn’t stupid.

Over the years of their friendship, Lena had been frequently baffled by her friend’s ability to connect with people, to gauge reactions and emotions, and to understand whatever was playing in people’s lives within seconds. Kara could sift through piles of information and draw quick, logical conclusions. Kara could quickly see through lies and betrayal, and she was always aware of the events happening around her.

Kara was smart.

And it seemed she put two and two together right before Lena’s eyes.

“The woman,” Kara paused. “The woman who came into the party… It was – ”

She seemed unwilling to say it. Or maybe her body was physically incapable of saying it. Whatever the case was, Kara’s eyes seemed to be begging Lena to finish the sentence.

“It was Andrea,” Lena said.

Silence fell over the room.

Kara nodded. In fact, she kept nodding, staring straight ahead. Lena could see the thoughts racing in those distant eyes, clogs turning in her head.

“Okay. Okay. So Andrea was at the gala,” Kara said, trying to sound as neutral as possible. “She’s a business-woman, it’s not unthinkable that she would be at such an event, right? Lena,” Kara said, almost relieved, “you were invited too right? So was Cat, so was Lillian. It’s a business event.”

Lena wasn’t sure who she was trying to convince more.

“Kara – ”

“Was she looking to invest in anything? Or maybe she was looking for business associates? Was she there to- to, I don’t know, sell Rojas Fashion Industries?” Kara rambled.

Each suggestion came out more desperate than the previous one.

“I mean, she was invited, right?” Kara asked, eyes flitting between Alex and Lena, who looked at her with an increasing amount of pity.

“Right?”

“Kara,” Alex said, a sad tremble in her voice, “the woman in charge was Andrea. She was the one involved with the organization.”

“No.”

“It’s called Obsidian.”

“No, Alex – ”

“Andrea spoke to Cat and Lillian.”

“No.”

“She tried to get Cat and Lillian to join, Kara,” Alex tilted her head empathetically. “She’s the one in charge.”

“No, no, no,” Kara shook her head, and turned around, facing the door. “No, no, it’s Andrea.”

“Kara, she’s involved in some dark things.”

“No, she’s – no!”

Kara brought a hand up to cover her eyes.

Lena and Alex fell silent.

“It’s not possible. It can’t be – ”

“Kara…”

“Why – ” Kara paused. “How – ”

“Kara, we can handle this, if you need some time you – ”

“No!” Kara shouted. “No you can’t just drop this on me and pretend that it’s no big deal! I can’t just go home and forget about it, Alex!”

“And no one’s expecting you to, Kar, it’s just – ”

“She’s my girlfriend!” Kara shouted. “She’s my fucking girlfriend! I’m around her all the time! I’ve kissed her, I’ve slept in the same bed as her, we – It’s Andrea! My girlfriend, Andrea! She’s always doing nice things for me, and – ”

“We know, Kara,” Lena cut her off. “But this is serious. Andrea is in on this organization, and we’ve got the evidence to back that up. You know we do. If she weren’t your girlfriend, you know for a fact you’d be on her in a hot sec.”

“Lena,” Alex warned.

Lena ignored her.

“I heard every word she said, Kara, she’s delusional! She thinks she’s doing this for a good cause!”

“Lena,” Alex hissed, stronger this time.

But Lena didn’t have the patience.

“Who does that remind you of, huh?” Lena insisted. “Harming aliens and people for the sake of doing something good? Who does that make you think of?”

“I can’t do this,” Kara shook her head. “I can’t.”

“That’s perfectly, okay – ”

“No,” Lena cut Alex of, ignoring the cutting look she got in response. “No. When you told me my mother was involved with Cadmus I didn’t want to believe it. You insisted she was involved in some bad shit, and I believed you. I worked with you!”

Lena shook her head and tried desperately to catch Kara’s gaze.

“You have to believe us too now.”

Next to her, Alex almost held her breath in anticipation, waiting for Kara to say something – anything.

“Where – ”

Kara paused.

“Did she put it in those exact words?” Kara asked.

“What do you mean?” Lena frowned.

“Did she say her organization was planning on hurting aliens to serve some higher cause?” Kara asked harshly. “Did she say it like that?”

“No,” Alex said. “Not exactly like that, but Kara – ”

“Then maybe she doesn’t know! Maybe she doesn’t – do you even know anything about this organizations apart from the fact that Andrea might be involved?”

“Not might be, Kara,” Lena cut in. “She’s definitely a part of this.”

“We know nothing about this organization!” Kara shouted. “We don’t know what they’re doing, we don’t know why – ”

“Oh cut the crap, Kara! You’re smarter than this!”

Lena couldn’t stand to see her friend’s denial spiral out any more.

“You know that we equated the organization to something bad a long time ago,” Lena said seriously. “We know they had something to do with the break-in, with the deaths of these D.E.O. agents.”

Kara flinched.

“Andrea said the company was all about protecting the city. Something about defense. When Cat and Lillian asked her to expand, and her mind didn’t go to prisons, or human attackers, Kara, no.”

Lena willed Kara to look at her.

“She talked about alien attacks. Her organization has something to do with protection against aliens. When we couple that with the things we’ve seen and heard in recent months, Kara – ”

Lena shook her head.

“I know you’re smart enough to put it all together. Please,” she added softer, pleadingly. “You know Alex and I love you. We love you more than anything in the world. We don’t want to hurt you.”

She exchanged a look with Alex, who looked anxious, almost teary-eyed.

“We wouldn’t say these things if we weren’t actually afraid.”

“Of Andrea?” Kara asked disbelievingly.

“ _For_ you,” Lena implored, her heart breaking.

Kara’s features tightened.

“You really think she’s capable of harming anyone? That she would hurt me?”

“Honestly?”

Kara nodded.

“Yes,” Lena said decisively. “I don’t doubt that she could.”

Kara let out a disbelieving scoff.

“Rao, help me.”

“Kara – ”

“Just stop. Stop.”

Lena bit her lip, but stopped talking.

Kara took a couple of deep breaths, turning her back on her friends. Then, she wrapped her arms around herself, almost protectively.

After a beat, she finally turned around.

“It’s not possible,” she whispered. “I’m sorry, but something must’ve gone wrong. Andrea would never hurt anyone – least of all me! She’s not perfect, I understand that! But she is not evil!”

“Kara, you don’t understand, she – ”

“No you don’t understand!” Kara countered. “It’s Andrea, for Rao’s sake, Alex! It’s my girlfriend.”

She looked around, almost like she was helplessly hoping for someone to back her up.

“She can’t be evil, Alex, she’s – she’s my girlfriend! We’ve been dating for months!”

“We know, honey,” Lena said softly.

Kara looked at her, desperate tears in her eyes.

“She helped me. She was nice to me from the very start. She was sweet even when she didn’t know me.”

Kara shook her head and covered her mouth with one hand, suppressing a sob.

“She’s warm and kind, and I know you two don’t love her, but she’s sweet to me!”

“I believe you,” Alex whispered.

“She always knows just what to say to make me feel better,” Kara continued, a mixture of a laugh and a sob following her words. “She laughs with me, and she dances with me. She makes me happy. It’s been so long since anyone – she’s good to me, Alex!”

“I believe you,” Alex repeated. “But I also believe what I saw, Kara. I believe people aren’t all good or all bad. And I believe that Andrea might very well be genuine and loving with you,” she reasoned. “I just don’t think her loving sentiment extends very far. You understand me, right?”

Kara’s bottom lip trembled.

“But she loves me,” she whimpered. “She loves me.”

“I know,” Lena whispered, sounding almost as broken as Kara. “I know.”

“Kara, we’re not saying – ”

“She loves me!” Kara repeated, stronger this time. “Goddamnit, she loves me! She loves me, she – ”

And then Kara buried her face in her hands and broke.

“She loves me, she told me so, she loves me.”

“Oh Kara,” Alex whispered, quickly striding forward and taking Kara in her arms.

“She loves me,” Kara cried.

“I know,” Alex whispered, pulling Kara as close as she possibly could.

Lena wanted to join in, she really did. But some higher power kept her rooted to the spot. Maybe it was the universe’s way of punishing her for ever wishing she could have something that wasn’t hers to have.

Or to love, in this case.

She wanted Kara all to herself, and now everything was falling apart.

Kara’s already pale face was tear-streaked, she was clinging to herself like she was trying to keep all of her broken pieces together, and Lena had never felt guiltier in her life.

This wasn’t what she wanted.

It wasn’t what she wished for.

“How could she do this?” Kara cried. “I don’t understand, it’s Andrea.”

“I don’t know,” Alex whispered. “But we’ll get to the bottom of this, I promise.”

“Andrea hinted there were many people involved,” Lena added. “It’s possible she wasn’t personally involved in every attack?”

Even to her own ears, that sounded like a flimsy excuse.

“I just don’t see how,” Kara whispered helplessly. “I don’t – between all her work at Rojas Industries, and then me, galas and other public events… I just don’t see how she found the time to do it.”

“I think I could’ve loved her back,” Kara whimpered against Alex’ shoulder. “If I’d just gotten a little more time.”

“I know,” Alex whispered, wrapping her arms around her.

“Maybe, maybe if I could just talk to her…”

“No,” Lena stopped her, quickly followed by Alex’ own no. “Kara I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“We don’t know what Andrea’s capable of,” Alex agreed.

“But if I could just explain then – ”

“Kara,” Lena interrupted disbelievingly. “This isn’t a woman you owe an explanation! This isn’t someone who’ll take the time to listen!”

“You don’t know that!”

“Of course I know that!” Lena yelled back.

“You don’t know her like I do!” Kara countered. “If I could just talk to her about aliens – about alien rights, I could – ”

“Oh my God!” Lena exclaimed before she could stop herself. “You’re delusional!”

“I am _not_ delusional,” Kara seethed.

“Guys,” Alex tried, looking between the two women worriedly. “Calm down. This isn’t the way to solve this.”

Kara and Lena ignored her.

“If I could just tell her – ”

“Tell her what?” Lena exclaimed. “That aliens are good, the world is a happy place, and her entire organization should be dissolved so we can all sing and live happily ever after?”

“No!” Kara shouted, anger burning in her eyes.

Maybe the anger was what she needed. Maybe the anger was keeping her from admitting to herself that Andrea was up to something terrible, and maybe it kept her from losing it and falling apart. Either way, Lena was just as happy to entertain Kara’s rage.

“If I could just tell her that I’m Supergirl – ”

“You tell her you’re Supergirl and she’ll kill you!”

A deafening silence fell over the room.

Lena’s mouth fell open in horror when she realized what she’d just said.

Kara was facing her, her face pale as a sheet of paper, her eyes had widened almost comically.

Though nothing was really funny about the whole situation.

Lena brought a trembling hand up to her mouth.

“Kara,” she whispered, “I didn’t – I shouldn’t have said…”

But Kara didn’t say a word. She just stared at Lena with an almost childishly confused look in her eyes. Lena almost expected her to pout.

“Okay,” Alex said slowly, eyes flitting between Lena and Kara like she was dealing with two wild animals instead of two perfectly sane women. “Okay, let’s all just… take a deep breath, alright?”

Neither Kara nor Lena uttered a single word.

“Look,” Alex implored. “This has been a very long night, and we’re all exhausted. I think it’s in all of our best interests to calm down and go home. We don’t want to say things we don’t mean.”

Lena felt Alex’ stare directed at her when she’d uttered those words.

“We can reconvene tomorrow and talk about this, but we can’t do it when we’re all yelling at each other.”

She looked around the room and arched an eyebrow.

“Well?” she asked. “Lena?”

Lena swallowed and nodded.

“Kara?” Alex asked, turning to her sister.

Kara didn’t move. Her face showed no indication that she’d heard Alex at all. She was staring blankly ahead, like she was still turning old words over in her head.

“Kara?” Alex asked again. “Did you hear me? I was – ”

Alex was interrupted by Brainy, swinging the door open. Lena almost jumped up, and clutched her chest when she saw who it was. She briefly closed her eyes and counted her lucky stars that at least this time they weren’t interrupted by another attack.

Sure wouldn’t be the first time.

“Jesus, Brainy, next time, knock, will you?” Alex said, equally perturbed by Brainy’s interruption.

“Apologies, director,” Brainy said, but you’re needed in conference room A.

“Can’t it wait?” Alex asked irritably. “I’m kind of dealing with something here.”

“I’m afraid it can’t,” Brainy said theatrically. “There is some urgency regarding the matter which needs your expert opinion.”

Alex sighed.

“Fine,” she said, “I’ll be with you in a minute.”

She turned back to her sister. For a few seconds, all she could do was stare worriedly at Kara, who still wasn’t showing any signs of improving. She ran a hand through her short red hair and shook her head slightly.

Eventually, she walked up to her sister and kissed her temple.

“It’s going to be alright, Kara,” she promised softly. “We’re going to get to the bottom of this, I swear.”

When Kara didn’t nod, Alex just shook her head and turned to Lena.

“Please take her home,” she asked. “I don’t want her to go home alone, and I can’t tell how long I’ll be busy.”

“Of course,” Lena said softly. “Whatever you need.”

Alex nodded tightly, a small indication of how grateful she really was, and with one lingering look at Kara, she left the room.

Kara and Lena stayed silent for a while. It was an awkward, tense sort of silence, one Kara and Lena hadn’t shared in quite some time. It felt suffocating and awful in the tight confines of the conference room, and Lena wanted nothing more than to shake Kara out of the state she was in and beg her to get out, to flee, to run away, just the two of them.

After a beat, Lena spoke up.

“I can text my driver,” she offered. “We can have a car out of here in five minutes if you want.”

Kara finally looked at her, dazed and a little confused.

“What?” she asked.

“I said I could get us out of here,” Lena repeated. “I can text my driver.”

“I don’t need a driver, I can fly home,” Kara said, sounding a little confused.

“I know that,” Lena said, brows knitting together worriedly. “It’s not about being able to, Kara. It’s about us worrying for you.”

“You’re worried I can’t find my way home?”

Lena pursed her lips.

“Or are you worried Andrea’s going to be there?”

Lena sighed.

“You don’t actually want me to answer that,” Lena said eventually.

Kara scoffed.

“But yes,” Lena said, irritated by Kara’s muted state. “You know what, yes, I think it’s a terrible idea to be with Andrea right now. Especially now that we’ve established just how she feels about aliens.”

Kara shook her head.

“She’s my girlfriend, Lena,” she whispered bitterly. “She’s allowed to be at my place. She’s allowed to be _with_ me.”

“Yeah, I know that,” Lena said dismissively, shaking off the stabbing pain that came with every mention of the world ‘girlfriend’ in correlation with Andrea’s name. “Still. She’s up to no good, and I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Kara shook her head.

“It doesn’t matter,” she whispered. “Besides,” Kara looked down, “you don’t have to worry. She won’t be coming anywhere near me for a while, I’m sure.”

Lena looked up sharply.

“What do you mean?” she asked. “What happened?”

Kara shrugged.

“Doesn’t matter now, does it?”

“Yes it does,” Lena insisted. “What happened?”

When Kara just looked away, Lena bit down her frustration and forced herself to calm down, and to help her friend. Just like Kara would if the situation had been reversed.

“Kara,” Lena asked softly, “what happened? Please tell me.”

Kara shrugged, but Lena could see her physical demeanor change. Kara’s shoulders dropped slightly, and she pulled her arms around her middle a little tighter.

“Kara?”

“We had a fight.”

“Oh.”

Lena didn’t expect that. Not at all.

“That’s ehm, well. That sucks.”

Lena cringed at her own robotic words. How she had been able to land a friend as compassionate and open as Kara was truly a miracle. But what else could she say to the notion that a potential alien-hater and the object of Lena’s affections just had an argument? Truly, the situation couldn’t get more out of hand if she tried.

Kara hummed in agreement, but didn’t look up.

Lena sighed, and shook her head. She walked over to Kara, and gently took her hand in hers.

“Kara,” Lena asked again, gently, sweetly, she hoped. “What happened? What was the fight about?”

Kara swallowed, and Lena could see the hurt in her blue eyes. The shame. The fear.

It broke her heart.

“I think,” she whispered hesitantly, “I think she… I think she called me a… a slut. But I’m not so sure.”

Lena’s mouth fell open.

“She what?!” Lena hissed.

“I don’t know,” Kara shook her head and sniffled. “I don’t know, it all happened so fast.”

“Okay,” Lena closed her eyes, and willed herself to fight against her Luthor genes that told her to race to wherever Andrea Rojas was, and to slap the woman so hard she would see stars.

“Okay,” Lena said again, calming herself down. “Tell me what happened. Slowly.”

“Well,” Kara whispered helplessly. “I don’t know. She barged in this morning, when I was still half-asleep. She started yelling and screaming, and – and I think she was looking for you.”

“Me? Why would she…”

Lena’s voice stocked in her throat when her mind suddenly put the pieces together. Andrea’s jealousy. Andrea yelling. Andrea looking for her. How Kara thought Andrea might’ve called her a slut.

“No,” Lena said slowly.

Kara let out a dry sob.

“No.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Kara shook her head. “Not after tonight – it doesn’t matter.”

“Yes it fucking does,” Lena hissed. “Kara, did she, or did she not, accuse you of cheating?”

Kara looked away, tears in her eyes.

“Kara,” Lena demanded.

“Yes,” Kara let out. “Okay? Yes. Yes, she thought I was cheating on her with you. She was so mad.”

Lena looked away in horror.

“Oh my God,” she whispered to herself. “Oh my God.”

“It doesn’t matter though,” Kara babbled. “It doesn’t matter.”

“She yelled at you?” Lena demanded to know. “She yelled at you for this? She blew up at you?”

The hopeless look on Kara’s face said more than her words ever could.

“Jesus Christ, Kara,” Lena mumbled. “Jesus fucking Christ.”

“Well it doesn’t matter anymore now!” Kara exclaimed. “It doesn’t matter because Andrea’s involved with God knows what, so it doesn’t even matter that we had a fight because… because…”

Seeing Kara on the verge of a panic attack, so incredibly broken by that bitch, Lena couldn’t help but react.

She pulled Kara into a hug, just as Kara’s tears started rolling down her cheeks.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Lena said quickly, as Kara’s tears soaked through her blouse. “It’s going to be okay.”

Lena didn’t know if Kara was listening, but she figured that if her words didn’t calm Kara down, they might at least calm her down. Because what kind of mess had they stumbled into.

“It’s going to be okay, Kara,” Lena whispered, as her arms closed around Kara’s back, pulling her close to her own chest. “It’s going to be okay.”

But inside, Lena was raging. She couldn’t believe Andrea. She wanted to rip that woman apart for making Kara hurt. For making Kara cry. She wished she could do things to Andrea that would make even Lex uncomfortable.

“I knew it was going to end bad,” Kara suddenly whispered. “I knew it was.”

“What?” Lena asked confused. “What was going to end bad?”

“This always happens,” Kara murmured in Lena’s shoulder, eyes closed tightly as tears stream over her flushed cheeks. “Everytime I let myself get close to someone, something bad always happens.”

“What?”

Kara let out a sound between a sob and a laugh.

“I think I might be a conductor for misery,” she said, her borderline laugh making the hairs on Lena’s skin rise up. “I think I might actually attract terrible situations. Like I just mess relationships up.”

“Kara,” Lena said slowly, “that is just not true.”

“Isn’t it?” Kara cried, pushing herself away from Lena.

Lena’s heart broke at the sight of Kara, so lost, so confused and so ridiculously heart-broken over a woman who didn’t even deserve to occupy even one cell in Kara’s mind.

“I kissed James, and then Myriad started.”

“That was – ”

“I loved Mon-El, and I wanted to stay with him, and then his mother attacked our planet and he was forced to fly off into space – lost.”

Lena flinched.

“Kara, that’s hardly your fault, it’s – ”

“And now Andrea,” Kara whimpered. “Now Andrea is mixed up in all of this, and I just – ”

“It’s not your fault, Kara!” Lena said forcibly.

Kara stopped talking, looking up at Lena with hopeless eyes.

“Kara… you are not responsible for Andrea’s bad decisions,” Lena shook her head. “You do not attract misery at all, Kara – ”

Lena shook her head, and almost – _almost_ – gave in to the urge to cup Kara’s face.

“You are an amazing person, and you do not deserve a single ounce of the hurt that you’ve been given in this lifetime.”

Kara scoffed and looked away, almost dismissing Lena’s words completely. It broke Lena’s heart.

“I mean it, Kara,” Lena insisted. “You are the most beautiful woman this world has ever known, and while I can admit that you haven’t been dealt a fair deck of cards, you are not a causational factor. You were in unlucky circumstances, Kara,” Lena maintained. “But _you_ are not unlucky. If anything, you bring more luck and happiness to people than anyone I’ve ever known,” Lena finished softly. “Anyone would be lucky to have you.”

Kara shook her head.

“You know I think of you as the smartest person on this earth, Lena,” Kara said with a sad smile. “But you’re wrong about this. Everybody I love gets mixed up in some terrible situation, and you can twist and turn it anyway you want, but I’m always in the middle of it. I don’t think anyone should have to deal with someone who’s at the epicenter of so much pain, hurt and misfortune. It’s not fair.”

She let out a sad laugh.

“Who in their right mind would even sign up for that?”

And maybe it had all led up to that. Maybe, this had all been for something, and maybe the universe had aligned all the elements in Lena and Kara’s lives to lead to this exact moment. Maybe Kara had to experience a pain like the one caused by Andrea’s bad decisions. Maybe it was all for something higher than just this bad relationship, or so at least Lena hoped.

Or maybe it was just dumb luck that Kara had phrased her question just so, and Lena was here instead of Alex or Brainy, and Lena could blame it on her own exhaustion and over-emotional state.

But whatever it might be, Lena didn’t think, didn’t blink, and didn’t wait, as she foolishly, blindly and stupidly – blaming it on the deep burning love she’d felt for Kara for so, so long – whispered hoarsely:

“I would.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys!  
> Happy Supercorp Sunday!! 
> 
> Here I am again with my +15k word update for Wonderland! I am so incredibly sorry about the long wait, but I want to thank you all for being so patient and kind during the wait! I worked on this in between studying for my finals and writing my thesis, but I promised myself to have it out before the two-month mark (8th of May). I have been so busy and stressed out, but I wanted to give this to you guys as a sort of consolation gift for having to stay home and enduring this pandemic. I hope everyone is staying safe, and I hope you are all doing well.
> 
> Special thanks to Melody-fox for all the help and for reading all the drafts I send her way! And a really big thank you to the people who supported me, like Nadine and 42Forever, thank you so much for everything! Thank you xx
> 
> And thank you so much to everyone for the encouraging messages, both here and on [my tumblr](https://thingsanddreamsandstuff.tumblr.com), they’ve meant so much to me, and got me writing even when I didn’t feel like it. You guys are the best, thank you.
> 
> Let me know what you guys thought of this – very plot-heavy – chapter. I hope you all enjoyed it. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you all have an awesome day/ night, and I’ll try to update my other stories in the next couple of weeks (hopefully – I can’t promise anything, sorry :( ). Lots of love!!!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! You can come talk to me on Tumblr right here: http://thingsanddreamsandstuff.tumblr.com/


End file.
